#i'm getting more comedy vibes from this than creep vibes
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q!Philever
So all I’ve seen is sad q!Philever angst fanfics about Forever locking up Phil and separating him from his family. But have you considered this?
Forever being an absolute failure in kidnapping Philza and Philza just. breaks out every time. Sometimes it takes him five minutes. Sometimes Chayanne breaks him out without Forever even noticing.
Forever gets so frustrated that he can’t have Philza that he starts crying and Philza makes him a cake to cheer him up for being a bad kidnapper all the while trying to stop cackling like the gremlin old man he is.
#idk#philza is not the right person for being a pathetic crow man unable to break out of a dungeon#i'm getting more comedy vibes from this than creep vibes#take your creepy dungeon angst#i need more 'self-proclaimed love interest played for laughs' in my life#q!philza#qsmp#q!forever#q!philever#philever#sugarduo#forphil
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Worm characters rated on how funny I think it'd be if they were trans:
Taylor: 2/5. Neither particularly funny nor unfunny. Just sort of neutral. She fits the bill for a stereotypical east coast white transfem with a stick figure build, but there's not much of a punchline.
Brian: 0/5. Almost any way you slice it this is kinda sad. Either "transfemme continually overcompensates by trying to be as masculine as possible in a way that never really can or will satisfy her" or "transmasc overcompensates into masculinity to maximize stealth even if it's harmful to him."
Lisa: 3/5. This is also fairly neutral in terms of funniness. But the idea of her being stealth is not entirely implausible to me. 4/5 if you subscribe to the "blonde hair is actually a wig" theory tbh.
Alec: 2/5. Too obvious, too easy. That said, scumbag transvestite is pretty funny as a punchline.
Rachel: 4/5 in basically any way you interpret this. But critically, Rachel does not know what a trans person is. If you called her transgender person she'd think you were trying to insult her until you carefully explained what those things meant and then she'd be like, "Well, I guess I am. But I don't know why you'd need a word for that. I just wear what I want." She's accidentally achieved gender nirvana.
Aisha: 2/5. Again, I think this is too obvious! She already has scumbag transvestite vibes.
Colin: 2/5 normally, but 4/5 if the transition happens during the Armsmaster / Defiant career change. "What do you mean? Obviously Defiant is a totally different person from Armsmaster, she's a woman and Armsmaster was a man!"
Dragon: 4/5. Has the same approximate funny value as SHODAN, GLADOS, or AM being trans, but slightly knocked down by her not being particularly evil. That said if Colin is also trans in this scenario, then we could imagine some kind of weird double force-femme scenario where Colin is reprogramming her to be more free in her gender while she rebuilds Colin's body into something more fitting and suddnely I think I hauve COVID.
Dennis: 5/5. If Dennis was transfem she would make indefinite puns about her chosen hero name. She would lean into it constantly I think. Very funny to think about.
Chris: 3/5. ADHD transgender failgirls / failboys will always rank well with me.
Dean: 4/5. Closeted the whole time he's with Victoria is a pretty funny scenario here. Gradually bringing up transgender people and then watching her aura very closely.
Missy: 1/5 Again, we're looking more at a "this is deeply depressing" scenario than "this is funny." "Why would I medically transition? Odds are pretty good that I'm not making it past puberty anyways."
Sophia: 0/5. Just not much here to go on tbh! Not funny!
Sveta: 4/5. Vial gives her the body she always wanted -> she gets confused and thinks she's supposed to be a man, so she transitions again -> she realizes that she's a woman again and de / retransitions. Just a comedy of gender errors.
Amy: 1/5. Eh is all I have for this.
Victoria: 2/5. Any implication in this descends more into a territory I would call creeping dread regardless of how funny it is.
Bakuda: 4/5. Pretty solid Unabomber-style "could transitioning have made her worse?" punchline.
Manton: 3/5. Insane cannibalistic transfem projecting her ideal, ripped, indefinitely strong, statuesque body into physical reality to hunt down her prey and I think I hauve COVID again. 4/5 if the Siberian also hangs schlong tbh. Just makes the whole image more comedic.
Riley: 5/5. "I transitioned at ten, but then later removed my own ovaries that I grew for myself for unrelated reasons."
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Something just annoys me when people say that Neverafter failed as a Horror Season. .
It was a horror season. It just moved through various horror sub genres. Did the vibe change after episode 3? yes. Did it still be a Horror season? Also Yes.
The Subgenres: Body Horror. Comedy Horror (That was the most one used, because it was 7 comedians in a HORROR SETTING), Dark Fantasy, Folk Horror, Cosmic Horror.
Horror doesn't need to be scary 100% of the time. Horror can just be creating a world of dread and uncertainty. A world where anything can happen. It was tense, it was spooky, it was a horror season.
Fucking hell. .take the video game Alien Isolation. The xenomorph learns how you play, but occasionally you know it's around, but you cant fucking see it or it's not that. That is the horror of the game. That is the tension. The pay off, you get enjoyment out of it.
Also I read a lot of horror books at the moment. The times I have been scared by a scene in a book, i can't count that high, but the reason why? The tension and the building to a reveal. The pay off. It's amazing. For Example: I got creeped out in The Ritual because of the style of writing and descriptions of the forest. You don't even see or read the description of what is chasing the main characters until literally the last chapters. I'm not kidding. That book is pretty much a Folk horror.
I've read some crazy body horror / splatterpunk that I'm not going to describe fully. Been creeped out so often and scared.
Also read some insane haunted house / psychological horror books as well. Those scare you because of the tension, the atmosphere and the build up to a moment. Like I have been fooled by a moment, where I think a scare or a jump is coming then nothing until it actually hits you.
The reason why people occasionally say it failed as Horror Season, just have one view of what a horror style TTRPG is. The common examples I believe are, Call of Cthulhu, Vampire the masquerade and Curse of Strand. Or just think horror is just how much we can scare people, jump scares galore right. It's not.
For example horror moments I loved in Neverafter:
The Spider fight. . Anything and everything could have gone wrong. And pretty much the aftermath. the description of the town being that fucked up because of the spiders.
PiB with the giants at the end - if he rolled badly, who knows what would have happened. But also he is a tiny black cat.
EVERYTHING WITH THE STEPMOTHER. Just my god. The description of her eating her children. Like the description of that moment of the group fleeing from her in the Library. Her treatment of Pinocchio. "I don't even have a name in my own story" speech (yeah that creeped me the fuck out)
Everything about Candlewick. . Yeah it was played for laughs because of Lou throwing away a Nat20 but Candlewick was just terrifying. My favourite Zac moment of that "so Brennan, who is being eaten"
Honestly the whole deal with the world between pages - that's Cosmic Horror, especially with the ink pot etc.. not going to lie, I was on edge with that episode, because my mind was going, something is too good to be true here, something is going to happen.
Ylfa - yes, 100%.. just her story, on one hand it's heartbreaking but the other the description of her eating the wolf to become the wolf..
Rosamund - got to admit I think why people think it failed as a horror season is because they were expecting more scenes like we got at the beginning. That opening sequence is incredible. The other briars moment that sticks in my head is the final fight one with Thumbelina.
Sorry for the ramble rant about Neverafter.
TLDR: THERE ARE MORE SUB GENRES FOR HORROR THAN PEOPLE THINK. BESIDES IT WAS A HORROR SEASON BECAUSE OF THAT.
#dimension 20#d20 neverafter#wulf ramble tag#im not kidding if i didnt read horror before going into Neverafter i dont know whether or not i would have enjoyed it as much as i did#wulfneverafterchat
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Just for the record, guys? I've seen the new Haunted Mansion movie multiple times now, and it's really good. Like -- really good. It's like the filmmakers took into account all of the problems I had with the Eddie Murphy film after my mum and I first saw it in theaters back in 2003 while working on their project.
In the Eddie Murphy film, I felt like just about everyone -- excluding the actors playing Edward Gracey and the butler -- were miscast. The child actors weren't that great, the two servant ghosts weren't that memorable (aside from Wallace Shawn reminding me of Vizzini the entire time), Jennifer Tilly as Madame Leota was as terrible of a casting choice as Kristen Chenowith playing Maleficent (sorry, Descendants fans, but -- what??), and Eddie Murphy himself...yeesh. Worst of all though, the woman playing Eddie Murphy's wife was a wooden plank of an actor, which made it so hard to engage with her when she's arguably one of the most important characters in the narrative.
In this film, just about every single person is perfectly cast. Every last one. Danny DeVito, Rosario Dawson...even Owen Wilson surprised me! Chase Dillon as Travis...that kid is going places, I'm saying it now! LaKeith Stanfield in particular was absolutely stellar: I even cried at one point, watching his performance, when I almost never cry at movies. Even Jared Leto -- who I admittedly don't know if I would've hired, given his history -- wasn't a bad choice, just as an actor. He certainly gave off "unlikable creep" vibes as the Hatbox Ghost -- so hey, I guess we have type casting, at least! I admittedly wouldn't have picked Jamie Lee Curtis to play Madame Leota, but she was still an infinitely better choice than Jennifer Tilly.
In the Eddie Murphy film, it leaned a lot on slapstick and pop culture humor, as opposed to any of the macabre dark comedy that the Haunted Mansion ride is known for. Eddie Murphy's style of humor really just didn't fit in with the tone of the original ride and the objectively beautiful Gothic sets the filmmakers had designed.
Yes, admittedly, the new Haunted Mansion movie uses pop culture references too (often in the form of rather forced product placements), but I won't lie, they still got a chuckle out of me, particularly since they weren't the only source of humor in the film. There were snappy retorts, cynical asides, subverted expectations, and -- of course -- dark humor, on tone with the ride. One rather funny bit ends up involving Ben and Father Kent trying and failing to convince elderly Bruce not to come to the Mansion after the old man says he's having heart surgery the following week, and later on, Bruce gets the particularly macabre one-liner "I'm too old to die!" right as he's being thrown in front of a speeding truck. We have Bruce cracking a joke to offer comfort during a really heartbreaking scene, rather than just to divert attention away from Ben's grief. We even have the rhyming headstones at one point!
The Eddie Murphy film focused way too much on Eddie Murphy's character being a "bad" father for working so much, rather than the way more interesting ghost story about Master Gracey and Elizabeth. We also get almost no references to the Haunted Mansion-canon characters aside from "Master Gracey" and Madame Leota.
In this new film, the backstories and personalities of the human characters tie INTO the story line with the ghosts, rather than distracting from it. Ben's dealing (very badly) with the grief of losing his wife Alyssa, which makes him particularly vulnerable to the Hatbox Ghost's machinations. Gabbie and Travis are similarly coming to grips with the loss of their husband/father. Travis is also having to contend with being the new kid in town and not having any friends while living in this haunted house that makes both things even harder. "Father Kent" gets hired to do an exorcism for Gabbie and Travis, only to get trapped by the ghosts himself, when he's not even a real priest, but he ends up using his own skill for persuasion and his strong emotional intelligence to bring in the other people they need to stop the Hatbox Ghost. Bruce has been obsessed with the lore surrounding the Mansion and similarly haunted houses for years, which makes him a valuable resource for exposition about the Mansion and later about the Hatbox Ghost's backstory. Harriet, as the resident medium, not only serves as the main combatant force against the Hatbox Ghost at the end since she has the power to banish him, but she gives great exposition about how our world fits in with the spirit world and this universe's "rules" about how they relate to each other. I kind of miss any real use of the Ghost Host, and I admittedly don't love this film's interpretation of Constance Hatchaway, since in the ride she's much more greedy and conniving, rather than just a flat-out maniac (plus, I'm sorry, but the story has both a ghost who chops people's heads off and another ghost who lost their head via decapitation and didn't connect their backstories together??) -- but we still have WAY more love for both the Disneyland and Walt Disney World's incarnations of the ride in this film than in its predecessor. There are even references to the creepy wallpaper and the bat-gargoyle stanchions in the queues!
And then there was my biggest gripe with the Eddie Murphy film -- that at the end, the curse is broken and all the little ghosts are "set free," leaving the "Haunted Mansion" largely abandoned. You know -- when the whole POINT of the Haunted Mansion is that it's filled with 999 happy haunts who want to be there? It'd be like ending a Pirates of the Caribbean film with Captain Jack Sparrow joining the Navy! Yeah, screw that -- this new film has their ghosts stay and make themselves comfy alongside their new living residents. Talk about an awesome fantasy for kids -- I would've loved living in a house like this Mansion, full of fun happy haunts who host rocking parties every Halloween!
But yeah -- I wouldn't say this film is perfect, of course...but if you're a fan of the Haunted Mansion ride, and want a film that captures its sense of creepy, Gothic beauty and dark humor without being needlessly gory or graphic, there's a damn good chance you'll love this. I know this movie should've been released in October and it's not really the "spooky time of year" right now, but please consider giving it some support in theaters, where the actors and writers who deserve your love will get a larger piece of the profit pie for their hard work than when films go to streaming.
#haunted mansion#haunted mansion (2023)#disney#reviews#the haunted mansion#opinion#analysis#seriously though this is why the film was released now -- we all know disney's trying to plug it up the wazoo on disney+ for halloween#and yeah again -- writers and actors get paid much less for streamed films than from box office totals :I
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friday! and a nice friday too, the sun is out and everything!
books:
(finished) This Wretched Valley - Jenny Kiefer: I maintain this would have been better/scarier if they had been good at their jobs lol, like I said last week. Like imagine how scarier if you're doing everything right and still can't escape and slowly realize there's some*thing* keeping you in the wilderness? Personal preference.
(finished) (phone book) Into the Dark - Claudia Gray: You know, I didn't love this one as much as I did on the first pass a couple years ago. A weird opinion shift: I really don't like Cohmac haha. I remember liking him before and this time I'm like...no you can't have custody of Reath, I don't like you. Ok, that's...not the most mature book critique but still. I wish either Jora hadn't died or Dez or Orla had taken custody of Reath :( But it does make me consider giving Midnight Horizon a second chance, because my opinions shifted so much, maybe the opposite will happen with that one. Or maybe I'll just be able to further justify my Cohmac dislike.
(in-progress) (phone book) The Rising Storm - Cavan Scott: Bell is back! I missed Bell and Ember. Not too far in yet but at least I am back on track. I feel like this is where things start getting sadder which makes me happy (sorry Bell) :)
(in-progress) The Hobbit - JRR Tolkien: I'm like 30 pages from the end lol, I only read this while I have my morning coffee, just to explain why it's taken me like three weeks to read a 250 page children's book.
tv:
(finished) Anthracite (Netflix): What an insane amount of subplots for 6 EPISODES?? Either Netflix needed to greenlight like...4x as many episodes or once they got their budget the writers needed to cut like half the subplots and tighten up focus. I'm still honestly reeling. It did do a good job getting you to care about the main characters despite all the insane plot stuff. Also this was weird: like 90% of it was really well shot, and then randomly there would be a scene that looked like it was shot by someone in high school. I don't know if they had to go back in for reshoots or what but occasionally it was like oof that's not good.
(finished) Baby Reindeer (Netflix): Everyone was talking about this so I had to check it out. It's very intense. Is it bad I found the comedy shows were the hardest scenes to watch, despite everything else?
(in-progress) Under the Bridge (Hulu): Seems like sort of a standard mystery but I'm really just here for Riley Keough and Lily Gladstone and the moody vibes and so far am satisfied.
(in-progress) Constellation (AppleTV+): Nice little bit of unreality/space horror so far. I actually got got by a couple scenes, I'm so desensitized to horror that it's nice when I actually get creeped out by something (the ARM in the second episode!!). Looking forward to seeing where this is going, judging by the first two episodes, seems like my pet conspiracy theory (the Lost Cosmonaut theory) is getting a high budget AppleTV adaptation, never thought I'd see the day. Also I got kind of hyped about the Canadarm cameo in the first episode. The shot panned over the space station and I out loud shouted 'it's the Canadarm!', startling the cat
film:
The Apology (2022): Apparently this was the only movie I watched this week, it was ok, mostly just background noise for making lunch/writing. I wish it had leaned more comedic, which is not something I usually say but I think it would have fit if they'd committed to making a really dark horror-comedy rather than flipping between predictable melodrama and some pretty funny catharsis.
craft update: I am free of the tyranny of having to purl! I joined up the two sides of my sweater so I'm knitting in the round now yay! It turned out I didn't have a problem with needle size, the whole thing did fit on one circular needle so now we're cooking with gas.
to do:
finish the work day. ick. but depending on how long it takes me to get through actual work, I can probably get some writing done too
laundry, both clothes laundry on my lunch hour (now) and sheets/towels at my parents'
I'm through 8 out of 12 chapters of current wip! Unfortunately chapter 9 is SO action-focused. why did I do this to myself. I mean I know why because then chapter 10 gets to be angsty but damn I have to block out so many action scenes. why.
I ordered a filing cabinet. it arrived. most of the negative reviews were about how hard it was to put together. so I should put 'assemble filing cabinet' on this list but I think 'let filing cabinet percolate' is a more realistic entry
I might go to a local yarn store on my way up to my parents' tomorrow, because it's local yarn store day and I do not need any more stitch markers but BUT I want more stitch markers. don't @ me I know I have plenty of stitch markers.
pick a new book: I'm torn between giving Kill Show another shot, starting the other book I have checked out of the library (The Deep Sky) or a secret third thing
have a good weekend everyone!
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live "tweet" books with me (via the goodreads progress bar) pt.2: Lore by Alexandra Bracken
idk who the narrator of the first part was, but I'm very confused...if he's not a god anymore is her love interest...or maybe her dad?
who is gil...how did he die?
her grandfather? wasn't gonna guess that
potential love interest spotted..hey masked dude
oooooo does she know him? intrigue
SEVEN YEARS HOLD SHIT THIS IS GONNA BE GOOD
potential love interest #2...van hello
I cannot stress enough how happy I am that her name isn't actually lore
wait nvm it is actually her name...that's stupid
Annabeth come get you mom, this is embarrassing
Percy come get your namesake ancestor...this is embarrassing
they are saying a lot of words that mean absolutely nothing to me?
happy to report that her name isn't actually lore...thank God...gods? whatever
"the Olympics but with murder" Nothing better happen to Miles bc I love him already
HAH poseidon and perseus reference
(I'm gonna spend this whole book talking about pjo just fyi)"
I get this feeling that apollo let Castor kill him
nooooo not the doggg
castor out here with the Olympians shittiest moments highlight reel to remind athena that he's cooler than her
oooo are miles and van gonna be a thing..that would be cute
athena deciding to keep miles around like he's a puppy is peak comedy
just because you're pointing out that the names are getting stupider doesn't mean you don't lose a point for continuing to name your characters stupid things
van and miles going on a secret special side quest together? mmmmhhmmm checks out
don't get me wrong I love a good enemy's to lovers but istg destiny if she gets with the guy who killed her family I will never forgive you
EW CREEPY PEDO GUY GET BACK CREEP
I am directly halfway done with this book, and there has yet to be one single ounce of romantic subplot...This is extremely disappointing"
WAIT IS GIL HERMES!!!
IS AEGIS THE NECKLACE
MILES HAS IT
I asked for romantic subplot but idk if this is what I wanted...however I'm a suckered for childhood best friends to lovers so we'll see"
"do that again when you mean it golden" period you tell her castor (I 1000% agree)
also him calling her golden is cute...even if I'm not sure why he does it"
hehe miles and van bonding time.. thats a romantic subplot I can get behind"
"oh so you're in love with him" YOU TELL HIM MILES
throwing away the necklace as if it's not extremely likely it's the thing you need...aces move lore, stop pouting and think
istg if you kill castor rn I'll never forgive you
IRO YOU MOTHERFUCKER IF YOU REALLY KILLED THAT BOY
HES ALIVVVEEE
ATHENA YOU MOTHERFUCKER...I should've know better than to fucking trust you
MELORA I KNOW YOU DIDNT JUST DO THAT
SHE WASNT EVEN LINKED ATHENA WHEN I FIND YOU
it doesn't make sense that she's had aegis the whole time and wasn't even thinking about it enough to hide it from readers...im sorry thats just lame"
this book lacks interesting romantic subplot but " I was born knowing how to do three things: how to breathe how to dream and how to love you" is the smoothest shit ever"
him calling her golden? cute...her calling him big guy? really fucking weird
istg don't pin with a couple separated by mortality, I can't handle that rn
HEHE lore calling van out for staring longingly at miles
lore and miles bestie vibes only
I get the sickening feeling castor will not be making it out of this book alive
holy shit she killed athena"
holy shot did athena just redeem herself
apollo let castor kill him CALLED IT
YAY FOR STAYING MORTAL AND STAYING WITH OUR FRIENDS!!!
This book wasn't bad but after the literally masterpiece that is the darkest minds series I expected more from miss bracken...the only reason I was able to read this as fast as I did was bc I had to finish it to read iron flame LOL
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🥊 - What do they love to do? What do they hate to do?
🌂 - What genre do they belong in? (Personally I believe all our OCs live in dark comedy horror flicks but I'm kicking that under the table right now)
🍥 - What age were you when you created the OC?
Give me some Victor. 🤲
• Ask Game for Someone's OC(s) •
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
🥊 WHAT DO THEY LOVE TO DO? WHAT DO THEY HATE TO DO?
Victor loves to solve things, as we know. His prowess as a P.I stems from the satisfaction garnered from solving the puzzle. He also loves to drive his car over the speed limit and watch his stories films. Spending time with his little family and friends are in there, not that he'd admit it in the early days, but coming home to his People is what he loves. Even more than shenanigans, which is saying something.
He hates waiting. He hates paperwork. He hates, with an undying passion, listening to lectures about red tape and protocol. He also hates ironing. He hates it so much and yet he must toil the domestic chores lest he get his ears chewed for looking like a crumpled paper bag.
🌂 WHAT GENRE DO THEY BELONG IN?
Victor best suits gritty neo Noir/creeping horror type settings given his whole vibe. But I agree, dark comedy horror really is the crux of them all. Albeit I think we're the only ones laughing LMAO.
🍥 WHAT AGE WERE YOU WHEN YOU CREATED THEM?
Uh. Before or around we met Koil, so a long ass time LMAO. Victor is one of the Core Barbies; Jen and Victor are some of the oldest I have in terms of builds that cemented extremely early. Their names haven't changed either, that's how you know they glued in during the early era. I'm going to say ... I must have been about twelve? So fifteen years ago.
#C Files#OC: Victor#I put Victor into your hands like a rag doll#Then smack him across the room#He makes a sound like a squeaky dog toy#and brother I love to chew on him#(Subject him to horrors)
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Which au (or au’s plural) of yours are you currently the most excited about, and what certain things are you most excited to explore (I love it when creators ramble about their works, so this is your permission to do so!)
Okay so!
Since one of my fics is coming to an end (only, like, two chapters are left. So I'll probably finish posting it this week) I'm now split between three main AUs:
My dsmp pokemon AU
My esmp x dsmp AU
And the AU @ladycatland made with the 50 Tommy clones and Quackity as their single parent (the number of Tommy will probably get decreased for practicality)
I genuinely don't know which one I'm more excited for because all of them have something different going for them.
Like, my Pokemon AU gets Ranboo being a very unwilling pokemon protagonist with all the evil villains going after him because he just passed the vibe test a bit too fast. And Tommy as a pokemon nurse that helps Tubbo realize his full potential as a trainer, so plenty of clingy duo interactions.
I also obsessed over every little detail of that AU. I know all of their teams as well as exactly what moves and abilities their pokemon have. And I use a damage calculator for the pokemon battles to make it a bit more accurate.
I may have hyperfixated just a tinsy tiny bit. But at this point it's too late to go back.
The Empires x DSMP AU meanwhile has my new fixation in it (which is Empires, to literally no one's surprise, I know) AND messed up crimeboys dynamic in it. As well as my beloved outsider pov because it's all gonna be written from various Empires' characters povs, so they see the whole shitshow go down only from the outside.
It's a bit more tricky to write because I have only ever written one Empires fic before, but I am watching literally every single Empires pov multiple times for a reason! I'll do my very best to keep them in character because god do I adore these funky block people!
It is based on Season 2 of Empires though, so I may have to change some details as I go.
Now, the last one is a bit different because it's something me and Cat just talked about at random that my brain for some fucking reason latched on and is refusing to let go.
The base idea was that Tommy dies in exile, Dream tries to revive him, but the Revival Book doesn't work. So Dream kinda loses his mind a little bit more than he already had and studies cloning.
He tries to create a perfect clone of Tommy to sort of bring him back but, well, Tommy's personality is just never there because none of these clones have lived through any of his life experiences. Dream doesn't destroy them anyway because at least he's not completely alone in his cloning factory.
During all this, Quackity follows Dream one day and he ends up stumbling onto this and getting caged down there to be dealt wth later. He's the first thing from the outside world the Tommys get to interact with so they all latch onto him and, gotten passed the creep phase, Quackity is more than happy to engage with them (mostly because it's better than slowly losing his mind in solitary confinement).
Eventually, Quackity manages to run and bring the Tommys with him to New L'Manburg to honestly mostly the horror of everyone there who now has to deal with a few imperfect copies of Tommy running around and slowly learning to be human.
It's the horror-comedy aspect of it all that makes it so fun to write, I think. I just love that mix of "ha ha random" mixed with existential dread.
#anon ask#dream smp#dream smp au#empires smp#empires smp au#esmp x dsmp#pokemonAU#5TAU#long post#this got long but then again how could it not when I was given free range to ramble about my aus?
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This movie quickly started out as a 'hell no,' but I ended up giving it a shot (mostly out of boredom) and it did, eventually, become a bit better. Not much, but a bit.
The scene with Dustin Hoffman and Rachel Weisz was all sorts of creepy/disturbing - though, honestly, Hoffman's character was that almost every time we saw him.
I know I'm seeing this like 20 years after it released, so there's been a lot of 'con' movies since then - maybe this was more novel then. But, looking at it now, all the twists were super predictable and none of the characters were really there to make you fully sympathetic to them. Like sure, by pitting them against a creep, you want them to 'win' and all that, but it's not so much you like them as you really don't like Hoffman's character (and that first scene where our protagonist forces a kiss on Weisz to 'sell a con' doesn't exactly make him endearing either). And Price, or whatever his name was - the intermediary they're trying to swindle - well, you don't care at all about him.
The guy that is making our 'protagonist' tell this story - I don't even fully understand the purpose of all that, other than to give you an 'intermittent flashback' storytelling approach.
The 'twist' with Weisz, and then the second twist with her, were pretty obvious. The twist with Andy Garcia too. And with the guy Hoffman sent to keep an eye on them (and naming him Lupus? what?). Them getting away with the money was inevitable. And really, at the end, the worst part was that our main character is fine and that 'being shot' he goes through was so obviously a fake/part of the con - so he's just gonna up and do this again somewhere else.
This had the feel, at times, of one of those Bollywood 'black comedy' movies, but those usually end not so great for our main characters (live, but lose the money; get killed at the end; etc.) - this had no such thing. Everyone walked out unscathed (well, except the guy who died early on). Also, there wasn't much comedy.
I also got strong vibes of the movie Ek Khiladi Ek Hasina ... which apparently makes a whole bunch of sense, because a quick Wiki search just right now just informed me that EKEH released 2 years after Confidence and was, in fact, a remake of this movie. (Patting myself on the back for recognizing this.) I think I preferred EKEH (apart from that iffy Nolan-esque ending) because I thought the characters were better overall (poor Kay Kay Menon's character, though; he didn't deserve the shafting he got), and the friendship between protagonist and 'early death' guy was also better displayed (of course, that is one advantage to Bollywood movies having songs; this movie, you just had to take his word that he was close friends, and hurt about it). Of course, I also saw EKEH like 10 years ago, so maybe I'm slightly misremembering - though I do vaguely remember sorta enjoying it.
First movie of 2023 in the books. Lets see if I can top the 180 movies from last year (not looking great, honestly, unless a lot of good new stuff comes out; I feel like the number of older movies I still wanna see but haven't as of yet is dwindling quickly, aided by Bollywood's disastrous 2022 not really adding much to my 'to watch' plate).
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48, 61 & 82 for Yael and 12, 31 and 97 for Ariel <3
048. Do they have any allergies?
Yael discovered late in life that xe has a mild shellfish allergy, after having an allergy panel done. This doesn't really affect xyr life since Kosher forbids shellfish, but it does mean xe has to be more careful about possible cross-contamination and sticking to Kosher-certified products.
061. Does your character prefer adventure or safety and security?
Yael is a certified control freak. It's very hard to get xem into new experiences unless xe is 100% sure at all times how it's going to go. Which, sorry Yael, that kind of defeats the point of the experience being new.
082. What are your character’s sleeping preferences?
Xe is definitely the type to have researched the Optimal Environment in which to sleep. Xe keeps xyr thermostat at exactly 68, has a weighted blanket, and sleeps on xyr back in order to prevent facial or skin-related issues as a result of sleeping on parts of xyr face. Xe also uses an app I'm fond of called 'Sleep Calculator' which helps you follow 90 minute sleep cycles in order to wake up naturally after 7.5 or 9 hours of sleep.
_____________________
012. What makes your character embarrassed?
Everything. Ariel is a very rejection-sensitive person, even if he doesn't betray it on his face. He hates watching second-hand embarrassment comedy in movies or shows. He hates when he's Perceived a little too hard in public. He hates when he stutters or talks too fast and makes slips of the tongue. He despises when he's called out in front of authority. He's just gotten good at brushing it off with apathy or jokes outwardly rather than showing his embarrassment.
031. Are they superstitious about anything?
Ariel's probably the least religious one in the office besides Dev. Still, it's hard not to be 'superstitious' when you literally work with ghosts for a living. He always side-eyes things or situations where it gives him Bad Vibes, even if he can't describe what those vibes are beyond a gut feeling. He also tends to get creeped out by patterns that carry on a bit too long, like seeing a certain item or sequence of numbers.
097. How well do they adapt to change?
I would say it's a toss-up. Ariel often has difficulty transitioning from one task to another, or one frame of mind to another. If there's a logical set of jumps, maybe, but if there's a sudden shift, he may struggle with it. This counts even if the change is positive, like going to bed earlier or getting a clearer set of expectations at work.
Thank you for asking!!
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oppa, oppa | victon
➞ victon as your older brothers
➞ fluff, comedy, siblings shenanigan
➞ brothers, they either leave you alone or won't stop annoying you. how are the seven guys of victon as your older brother?
seungwoo:
the prepared type
first of all if you are another han sibling then your visuals are out of this world anyway...
this type of brother has experience in dealing with sisters and he knows what to do to make you feel better
a pro with dealing things that are related to your period or maybe just you being you
best at helping you through hard times
his overall presence is just calm and warm
can and will tease you though
one of it includes intentionally placing things too high and out of reach
he is still your brother so 🤷♀️🤷♀️🤷♀️
might be the only brother who has no problem introducing you to the other members
still kinda iffy with the idea of you dating one of them. he knows he can trust his members but overprotective brother tendencies can't be stopped
if ever you are somehow mentioned on tv, a lot have noticed how he suddenly brightens up
there are even jokes that he has favoritism and prefers you over sunhwa and your other sister
"is my younger sister dating someone? well i hope not."
the other mother type
seungsik:
aka a border of lucky and unlucky
this type of brother is almost like your mother. they nag at you to do a lot of things but they also basically just do all the chores
yes, i can see seungsik taking over your chores when he thinks you're busy to do so
and maybe he is more of the chill mom
your mother is still there after all, she can take the strict role while seungsik is still a reliable brother
all those difficult chores he does on victon's dorms? same applies back in your home
always the first one to text you asking if you have eaten already and many more questions regarding how you are
the members, as always, teases him and that also includes you
"wah seungsik your sister is a better dancer than you are" "if she becomes an idol, you are doomed"
will just laugh it off. to some degree he does view you as someone talented
your biggest hypeman
"go [name]! you can do it!"
the best friend type
chan:
how does it feel like to have two brothers that are idols?
this type of brother can be treated as your best friend and would even help you with your cover up stories
basically an mvp brother
want to sneak out of the house? he already has plans to save you in case you get caught, that is assuming he'd let you get caught
going through heart break? he's right there for you
period problems or class struggles? well he tries to help but might rely on heojun (sometimes your older brother needs help from the oldest brother)
seriously though he cares so much for you
he might not share his problems to you, as a brother he just wants you to be as stress-free as possible
i think to a certain extent, chan would make you his dance student
like especially when the both of you were much younger, he'd like to teach you how to dance
speaking of dance... he doesn't necessarily stops you from meeting the other members but like he also doesn't make an effort to do so
as much as possible he wants to "protect" you from them
also as he loves shoes i can see him gifting you one way too much
"whats your shoe size again?"
the annoying type
sejun:
sejun stans forgive me but he really gives off this vibe
this type of brother just makes your blood boil. teases you, repeats your words, and basically just act annoying
if ever he finds out who your crush is, may your soul be at peace
if you already think that he is annoying... it just gets worse
he will tease you so much and go through a lot of times where you thought he would expose your crush
sejun wouldn't go that far though — you can do the same afterall
there are moments where he really seem like your older brother
like one time someone creepy was following you, when you called sejun he quickly arrived and scared of that creep
most of the time he just shows his love for you by being annoying — sejun means no harm and would never intentionally cross the line
"oh? that container you left in the freezer? yeah, i'm the one who ate whats inside."
the "you worry for him" type
hanse:
i am sorry for this slander hanse and hanse stans
this type of brother might seem scary and intimidating at first but looks are deceiving. he is scared of everything
you might be even the one taking out bugs that somehow found its way inside your home
just imagine watching horror movies and he is the one screaming 😭😭😭
however, despite being this type of brother he is quite protective of you
will not — in any circumstances — allow the victon members to date you. he has discovered many things in his time with them
might bring the guys as back up if someone ever breaks your heart
also the type to have matching tattoos with you
just picture hanse in a live and then he suddenly brings out his new tattoo and the story behind it
"oh, this? my sister and i got matching tattoos! she did the design. it looks so pretty right?"
the everyone's crush type
byungchan:
you absolutely can not stand the sight of someone flirting with him
this type of brother is the one your friends (and many others) simps for. that means he always receives things from his admirers and at times people would even ask you to give it to them
don't worry though he will share the chocolates with you
totally see him getting away with a lot of things and when the injustice starts hitting you, he will do everything to make you laugh and forget about it
he is caring like that
also he tries to scare off your admirers. you are still his little sister and its hard for him to see you grow up (will be very accepting if you start dating though)
can also see him dancing girl group songs with you and would even teach you if you want him to
"what are you doing? thats not how you dance rollin', let oppa teach you."
the sort of indifferent type
subin:
basically my older brother tbh
this type of brother is someone you don't necessarily spend time with but if you need help or just someone to talk to they will drop everything to do so
as he has 3 sisters before him, i think he'd be similar to seungwoo in the aspect where he knows how to take care of you
texts with him might be cold and detached but he has already shown how much he cares for you (maybe he even has a lot more care for you than you thought of)
unless there's an event where you might meet victon, subin will never introduce you to them
the most they can get of you is through a picture or hearing one of the rare phone calls between the both of you
#chairman subin protects
also i think if he is endorsing a brand or something, he would send it to you
"you know i'm modeling for a cosmetics brand right? if you receive a box its from me."
©9h4mn | all contents belong to me. do not modify or repost.
#victon#victon reactions#seungwoo#seungsik#chan#sejun#hanse#byungchan#subin#han seungwoo#kang seungsik#heo chan#lim sejun#do hanse#choi byungchan#jung subin#victon headcanons
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I'm a little confused about what the movies/tv shows timeline would look like for the series, could you clarify?
So, pre-Avengers I think Audrey makes a variety of cameo roles. She’s in the Iron Man films briefly, she’s featured in an epilogue of Captain America: The First Avenger, I know this technically isn’t first but she plays a minor role in Captain Marvel. Generally, she’s just kind of present in a lot of the movies before she becomes a lead.
The way I structured this list is so that each movie that’s canon is just listed with its corresponding fic, but all the ones I’m making up have a little summary too lol. Spoilers below so beware of that. I hope this helps!
2012
The Avengers (May 2012) – covered by Monachopsis
Cross-Country (July 2012) – this one would look like the oneshots/shorts that Marvel used to make about its side characters, but it covers Steve’s birthday and the road trip that Steve and Audrey take cross-country
Lady Liberty: Legacy (September 2012) – this covers the arc of Nodus Tollens that I just finished, which is about Audrey’s mission in Europe, DIVUS, Delphine, etc.
The Tower – Season 1 (October-December 2012) – This show focuses on the found family aspect of the Avengers and is like a dramedy. In my head, I picture it as being filmed as a mockumentary with little talking heads because I like those and I think it suits the format well. Content wise, I feel like it airs on ABC. Takes place from October 2012-December 2012, runs for 8 episodes.
2013
Black Widow: Opus (January 2013) – Covers the Siege of Chicago, another arc I write about in Nodus Tollens. Explores Natasha’s backstory with ballet and kind of has Black Swan meets Atomic Blonde vibes. Set in January 2013
The Tower – Season 2 (June-August 2013) – Picks up where its predecessor left off and runs for another 8 episodes. It also corresponds to Nodus Tollens and builds/develops Audrey’s relationship with Bruce as well as Steve’s relationship with Darcy
Thor: The Dark World (2013) – Set November 2013, also corresponds to Nodus Tollens lol (this book is long)
2014
Agent 13 (February 2014) – Marvel oneshot about Sharon Carter, Audrey, and the transfer to DC, as well as Peggy’s legacy with SHIELD
Captain America: The Winter Soldier(April 2014) – corresponds to
Hawkeye(s) – (May-August 2014) – Kate Bishop and Clint Barton work cases in Los Angeles, where they meet America Chavez and other members of the Young Avengers. I’m not totally sure if I’m gonna write this or not, but basically it corresponds to Matt Fraction’s Hawkeye comics. This one is an action-comedy, like if Community met Veronica Mars
The Falcon – Season 1 (October-December 2014) – Okay I’m just a little Sam Wilson stannie but I feel like they should have done more with him, so this series focuses on him primarily, but features Steve, Audrey, and Natasha as side characters. They’re looking for Bucky, but it’s also about him living in the tower and falling in love with Olivia Perales. This corresponds to a spinoff oneshot (probably 10-15k words long) called Fear of Flying. It airs on Netflix and receives rave reviews for its bingeability. The tone is comparable to Scandal or other Shonda Rhimes dramas.
2015
Agent Carter – Season 1 (January-March 2015)– this is what it is and it corresponds to Midsummer, which is just a series of oneshots about Audrey growing upu
Avengers: Age of Ultron (May 2015) – Corresponds to Aurora
Quicksilver & the Scarlet Witch (released June 2015) – set throughout 2015; about Pietro and Wanda’s adjustments to their new lives as Avengers. They’re both like 19? 20? This is written like a sitcom, kind of like what they’re doing with WandaVisionbut without Paul Bettany bc I hate that little man….anyway this technically takes place at the same time as Elysian but tonally they’re very different because Elysian is about Audrey going crazy and grieving Bruce’s “death” but the show is about the twins and their relationships with each other and an assortment of other employees from the base, who aren’t superheroes but are like medics, etc. I think the tone is like Scrubs
2016
Agent Carter – Season 2 (January-March 2016) – same as the above; about Peggy’s life in LA kicking ass and her romance with Sousa
Captain America: Civil War (April 2016) – this corresponds to Allegiance, while also unpacking unfinished business from Lady Liberty: Legacy and Captain America: The Winter Soldier
The Falcon – Season 2 (September 2016) – this is about Sam, Bucky, Steve, Nat, Pietro, and Wanda’s life on the run, but it especially focuses on Sam and his own missions/the villains targeting him. Tonally, still Shonda Rhimes.
2017
Lady Liberty and the Angels of Mercy (February 2016) – Marvel’s second R-rated film, but the MCU’s first. Think about it like Birds of Prey in terms of general vibes. Set immediately after Civil War and features an epilogue that connects Audrey to Thor: Ragnarok. The story is set in Los Vegas. Corresponds to Eternity, which is even longer than Nodus Tollens
Defenders – Season 1 – features overlap with some of the characters from Angels of Mercy as well as Annie Esposito, a mob princess of New York. Corresponds to Pernox
Thor: Ragnarok (November 2017) – Happens as it does, except for the part where Audrey has a short-lived romance with Loki and the part where Audrey and Thor realize that they are connected in their powers. Considering including Lindsey Dubois in this just so I can have a romance play out between her and Valkyrie (Janelle and Tessa 4ever…) but also, I might not. Corresponds to Eternity
2018
Avengers: Infinity War (April 2018) – So yeah they fight Thanos, etc. I’m changing the way Thanos is portrayed though bc I could not get over how he looks like a thumb long enough to actually feel afraid of him so this time he’s played by John Hamm and he’s a lot more well-connected than we all thought he was. Also, the children of Thanos are actually all children because um I think that ups the creep factor some more. Corresponds to Eternity as well
The Real Hawkeye (October 2018) – Kate Bishop and America Chavez fighting crime. After the snap, there’s a spike in crime against vulnerable people who have lost their caretakers. Might be set in a cult that actually worships Thanos? And promises that it’s all a very good thing, what’s happened? Very much a noir, might even be in black and white a la The Lighthouse.
2019
Lady Liberty: Resurrection (January 2019) – Audrey wakes up on the other side of the universe after being kidnapped and decides to make her way home. Featuring Carol Danvers, Loki, Nebula, and Valkyrie. Corresponds to Eternity and kind of feels like Star Wars/GotG
Avengers: Endgame (April 2019) – Does not happen as it was written, because it was written like trash, but the same stuff needs to happen. They fight, they win, etc. Corresponds to Eternity.
2020
Black Widow: The Long Thread (whenever covid ends 2020) - just the existing Black Widow movie lol
2021
Avengers Academy – Set 20 years in the future, Avengers Academy is a TV show that follows the next generation of heroes. Kind of soapy, kind of witty. Like if Riverdale was good. Driven by an ensemble cast: Margo Banner (Bruce & Audrey’s daughter), Anastasia Barton-Romanoff (Natasha and Clint’s daughter), Morgan and Leo (Tony and Pepper’s kids), and some others I have not invented yet.
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(Photo from the Variety review)
I'm so into Ready or Not that I could write fanfic about it. Fair warning, this film includes heavy gore and death and a few jump scares. Those usually put me off a horror film, but this was recommended by a friend. At this stage in my ongoing bad relationship with the horror genre, I only watch things people rec me.
This is good stuff. Really, really good stuff, falling strongly in the black comedy or horror comedy subgrenre. The thing that gets me about it; gets me until I'm sitting here composing a love letter to a horror movie in front of all of you, is the characterization.
You heard me. Characterization. In a horror movie.
This film is chock-a-block full of people who have clear motivations and backstory. You get why people are doing what they're doing. You get their struggles. Even the truly awful people - you get them too.
Grace, the unlucky bride who becomes the prey of a half dozen detached and desperate psychopaths, is the kind of protagonist you want from a horror movie. She's you, the person yelling at the screen through a lifetime of dumb jumpscare-driven cinema. Her progression throughout the movie, while not necessarily 'realistic' (because the situation itself is so ridiculous), comes across as both logical and human. Grace is tenacious. She's determined - first to impress this family she's always wanted, then to Not Die. She's a badass, but she's a badass who can be hurt and terrified and emotionally compromised, cry out of frustration and scream at the OnStar. Then she gets up, tears off her sleeve to bandage her hand, and gets back at it.
The writing in this film is excellent. It's clever, darkly funny, and gives away tiny, shiny pieces of motivation and backstory for every character no matter how incidental. It's like a horror D&D campaign devised by the best DM you've ever met. It never feels overburdened by exposition. There's just enough to move the story and no more, and it's broken up throughout the film. Every character is different and consistent, and the cast acts the hell out of it. Every character logically pursues their motivations. Every character with conflicting goals struggles with that. I mean, you wouldn't think that's a high bar, but in the age of streaming-exclusive churned out goreporn clogging the horror categories of Hulu and Netflix, it's higher than you think.
The set is beautiful. It walks the line between the candleglow warmth of an old house and the oppressive air of a labyrinthine medieval castle. There's little touches of displays and design that reflect the family fortune as game makers. The whole business creates an aura of a polished antique game box and drives the backstory home a little harder, with the something-isn't-right-but-ohgod-isn't-it-delicious vibe of electroswing and haunted old theaters.
The soundtrack is fabulous. Think Addams Family; a lush solid orchestral composition that swells and scurries and ratchets up the creep while also gorgeous as standalone classical music. The soundtrack is on Spotify, including the creepety-creep-creep-creep Hide & Seek Song and the hard rock version of Love Me Tender from the credits.
If that's not enough, the ending is satisfying and - as Variety puts it - explosively funny. It's the kind of ending I want from my horror but rarely get.
I can't recommend Ready or Not strongly enough. If you enjoy dark humor and can stand a few gore splatters; if you liked the underlying critique of humanity from Torchwood's Countrycide or Supernatural's The Benders, this film won't disappoint. People are the real monsters here. The worst part is, they know.
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