hewwo can i request some sweet mckirk smoochin? :') jim turning up that patented Kirk Charm and showering bones with affection, bones getting all flustered and absolutely melting 🥰 your style is so lovely!

hewwwo !!!!! thank you so much for the request and the kind words<33 sorry for making ya wait (i made a bunch of things tho >:33 hope ya like em! (⁠*⁠´⁠ω⁠｀⁠*⁠)

(i swear ONE DAY ill finally have the kiss-drawing epiphany and draw lips actually touching. today is not that day but im getting closer !!!!! fingers crossed)

NOW FOR COMIC<33

(since i now have a squeaky clean inbox yall feel free to send in some reqs (hc word dump reqs also open tbh might be fun!) see ya on the other side of the inbox<33)

edit: FORGOT TO ADD MY FUNNIEST TAG IDEA YESTERDAY IT GOES HERE NOW IDGAF

#@the painting: it CAN be platonic mckirk if youre brave enough. itd be in character 100% just LOOK at the tos bloopers. tell me they wouldnt i dare you

ok finally one good update that you can put a read more on posts in the app like you don't need to see this yessss

anyway i watched la piscine and face to face yesterday bc i had a realization recently that when i was binge watching the romy filmography and during that i've read her biography it really made me lose all motivation to watch la piscine in particular so i skipped just that one and when i was doing the same w the gian maria filmography and read his bio also the same thing happened w face to face jsvshwnjs. and it was such a funny connection to make so i was like what if... i watched these after all, back to back, even though i still don't care about either films? like the line of thought was that bc of this experiment it would make the films at least a little bit interesting. like two negatives making a positive. well did the films turn out to be good? no they were fucking annoying i was right all along. was making myself watch two films that i was sure i would hate, funny? yes a bit.

although they varied a little like w face to face i knew it'd be a blatant didactic eye rolling moment and in the first place i didn't want to watch bc in the bio they say almost a comical amount of times how much he hated doing these westerns and i was like fine fine i won't watch any more of them then. on this note there's almost something sad about reading the letterboxd reviews calling this his best performance but what can you do. and well the film in question was not very good yes. rather annoying i would argue. the way it was put together was kind of sending me like the unbelievable dialogue, gian maria blue eyes moment (i was very hurt by that) tomas milian in an absurd wig leading the people out of the desert jshzvsubsjzjsjs uh purgatory city? random sex crazed underage girl who i think was supposed to be the mary magdalene of the group?gian maria fascist speech? him eating those weird little outfits up? so it had the potential to be trashy fun but it was too much of a mess that it became kind of a drag. but i won't lie looking back it's almost a fun film in its own bizarre way. in a sense a two star classic

but what was more enraging actually was la piscine bc i was expecting a lot of bad things (namely the presence of the lead actor in question hence my reason for not watching it before. like i really don't care to see them together. at least in christine there was jean claude brialy camping it up and in the assassination of... uh. there was richard burton also. camping it up. anyway.) but the final straw was not giving romy enough screen time like are we out of our minds. like yes the (barely existent) plot was annoying, the characters made no sense, the dialogue was verging on terrible, i only care about 2 people out of the 4 in here, but i suspected all that. and to think even in her limited screentime she tried her best and there is that confrontation at dinner scene where i was like yesss finally go give us everything queen but then we're back to alain delon staring at nothing with a nondescript expression. maurice ronet at least tried to do something, i like his performances and he had a good chemistry w romy in all their films. but people always have to hype up untalented people so tragic. and like it's literally miserable that this is one of romy's more famous roles like this is not all that she can give.... the people need to wake up. eh. also i really don't get why this film has so many remakes like what reason is there to watch besides the cast (ehhh) and the late 60s vibes. well one star for romy being cute but otherwise this was. torturous!

all in all wasn't really worth it that much but at least it reinforced in me what i already knew. and we must take all the little scraps of entertainment while we can i suppose. this was me to myself while watching these

Cerebus #11 (1979)

The only weapon you need to provoke a police officer to violence is scorn.

Sorry! The above caption had nothing to do with The Cockroach's first appearance in Cerebus and everything to do with how the Omaha Police arrested peaceful protesters by claiming that they're purpose was to "attack and/or provoke police officers to violence." Also, you can tell they're already spinning and lying by adding the "and/or" so they can imply that the protesters are planning on attacking police. And, well, even if they weren't (and they did say "or"!), their other main plan was to provoke them. But of course everybody whose ability to perceive reality isn't clouded by their incessant need to defend police no matter what understands that police will abuse their power at the drop of an eye roll. They believe any slight disrespect is an excuse for a violent rebuttal. They force physical violence on people whom they have no reason to arrest simply so the person can struggle against the assault, as any normal person would do, and then claim resisting. Police should be confronted by scorn and disrespect at every turn. Only when they learn not to instantly resort to violence and threats will they deserve to not be. Welcome to my comic book and/or police review blog! Deni's "A Note from the Publisher" continues on a theme that I hadn't noticed until just now: every new issue of Cerebus now seems to be a landmark issue! It's an interesting self-promotion take that I have to admit I'd never thought of trying. "Every new Eee! Tess Ate Chai Tea review is a landmark review!" You know what else is a landmark? Places & Predators, my Cribbage-based Roller Playing Game! You don't even really need any friends to play it. Just read it like a book and enjoy it! Or play it like a Fighting Fantasy Adventure Book! Use some online Cribbage app! Figure out how to use the crib in ways the online app definitely won't let you! Oh, the reason this is a landmark issue is because more letters came in than normal! It's a hit! Deni also reveals that she'll be making the Cerebus plush toys that were advertised in previous issues and at half the price! So kudos for stealing that job from the person who originally made them! It probably wasn't anything so dramatic but what fun is going through your life defaulting to the best, most optimistic possibility in every given situation? Have some fun! Act paranoid! Purposefully misunderstand your father and scream in his face! Kick a dog! Sorry! I got carried away! I would never kick a dog unless it was attacking me. But even then, I'd be wishing I was kicking the owner who let it go off leash. The dog doesn't deserve my epic self defense tactics in its soft face. But the owner certainly does!

The basics on the origin of The Cockroach.

I didn't realize Dave came up with The Cockroach because it was gross and disgusting. I just thought it was a more clever version of a bat, keeping to the shadows, hiding, surviving, a constant annoyance to poor people. In any case, The Cockroach is the greatest parody of The Batman, hands down. Because The Batman has become such a parody of himself time and time again, you just need an absolutely Batshit insane version of him. I don't do segues so Cerebus has come to Beduin to sell the Black Blossom Lotus. Just look at all the continuity Dave Sim is giving his readers! I wonder how many comic book fans would list "continuity" as their number one favorite thing about comic books? Like, are there people who would list that above great writing or terrific art? Judging by how terrible a lot of mainstream comic books are and how rabid many of the fans, I'd suspect it was a fairly high number. Maybe 65 out of 100, Bob. Change that card! The Merchant Cerebus deals with is a kook who might just have a super secret identity. It's weird to think of the Roach as being capable of actually living an independent life! I suppose he's just barely hanging onto his sanity at this point (and, of course, only during the day). But then he comes into the mystical aura of strangeness that aardvarks apparently exude out of their buttholes and he just loses it completely. He becomes less a merchant slash superhero and more a superhero slash zombie cosplayer. Also he becomes one of the greatest characters ever created! There are like four of them in the entirety of Cerebus! The exclamation point is because I think that's an incredibly high number and not because I think it's an incredibly low number. Most comic book's protagonists never quite make it to the greatest ever! Plus I'd probably give Cerebus more than four but a lot of them are just really good parodies, satires, and slightly-off representations of characters and people who already existed. The merchant buys the Black Blossom Lotus from Cerebus for 100 gold pieces and then promptly drops it out of the window and into the Feld River.

Not only does Dave Sim come up with a bunch of memorable plots across three hundred issues, he also comes up with a lot of good Dungeons & Dragons campaign ideas.

The Merchant pays Cerebus a sack of gold and gets ready for bed as Cerebus begins to leave. Before Cerebus can even exit the hallway outside the merchant's bedroom door, Cerebus begins to hear loud ranting coming from the other side. It's a lot of hissing and threats of murder. Against his better judgment, Cerebus decides to see what's happening and gets his first look at the guy who will be a huge headache to him for the next two hundred issues or so.

One thing I like about Dave Sim is how honest he is when recounting where he came up with or stole his ideas. He gives plenty of credit for the Cockroach and his hissing to Marshall Rogers and Jules Feiffer. It's admirable because a lot of people would just figure, "It might make me look less of an artist and who's going to know anyway?!"

Just a few days ago, my old elementary school friend who was blown up in Iraq and then became a comedian playing to Christians and patriots (which I mention so you'll understand how, as a wounded veteran, he'll never be criticized by his audience and he'll never really grow as a comedian) posted a Tik Tok on Facebook that was just a film of a television set capturing the "Masked Debate" bit on Last Week Tonight with John Oliver. The clip only shows all the clips of news readers saying "masked debate" and none of Oliver's or the show's set-up. He then watermarked it with his Tik Tok name. Now all of those naive followers who can only seem to reply to his posts with the laugh/cry emoji probably think he wrote it. Better yet, they're probably mostly Trump followers who would never admit to finding that libjerk Oliver or his show funny. What's even better is that the Tik Tok has some quote along top that's watermarked with somebody else's Tik Tok name! So it looks like Bob doubly stole the bit. Man, I wish I'd joined the army and gotten blown up and then found Christ and developed an audience of uncritical naive yahoos who would wildly applaud everything I wrote! Why didn't I join the army?! Oh, that's right. Because I believed I had a future right out of high school. Well, I guess Bob is having the last laugh now! Cerebus follows Cockroach across the rooftops to find out what's going on. He eventually witnesses the Cockroach confront a man in an alley, accuse him of killing his parents, knock him out, and steal his gold. The gold part of the night helps Cerebus to ignore all of the other confusing stuff. The Cockroach doesn't gloat for long. He's off to find another victim! Cerebus witnesses him mug another guy whom he also accuses of killing his parents. He also admits to doing this for thirty years. So now Cerebus thinks the guy is crazy but also crazy rich. At the end of the night, the Cockroach returns home and drops the gold purses into a secret panel in the wall. He falls asleep, wakes up, and, when he sees Cerebus, acts as if Cerebus were just leaving. So Cerebus realizes that the merchant doesn't have any idea what the Cockroach is doing. Which means Cerebus is going to recover those gold purses before the Cockroach comes back! At the moment, Cerebus doesn't realize that he's going to be finding thirty years worth of gold purses in the merchant's walls. Can you imagine how boring the last two hundred and eighty-nine issues of Cerebus would have been if Cerebus managed to steal all of the Roach's gold?! I'm sure some of you are thinking, "It wouldn't have been any worse than the last hundred issues we did get!" Also, can you imagine how fat Cerebus would have gotten drinking tons of ale and eating loads of rich foods? I'm laughing so much just trying to picture it! Ha ha!

Eight feet of gold would make Cerebus fatter than a domesticated raccoon!

In the end, Cerebus only makes it away with three sacks of gold. But in the process, he manages to completely screw up the Roach/Merchant equilibrium that's lasted for thirty years. In trying to exploit the man's mental illness so that he'd help Cerebus move the gold, Cerebus drags the Roach personality into the daylight. From here on out, the Roach will simply be a pawn of others, susceptible to almost any second-rate demagogue (although most of the people who subsequently control the Roach are of the first rate variety). The Aardvark Comment section was two pages this issue and had this letter that I don't think was being sarcastic?

I guess I also wouldn't necessarily consider a chainmail bikini as "a disgusting costume." He's probably thinking about Power Girl.

Also, and I admit it might have been a joke, but Dave Sim reveals that Ronald Reagan is Cerebus' father. That, um, makes sense! Cerebus #11 Rating: A. I almost gave it a B+ for variety but then I remembered I just read the first appearance of the Roach. I also forgot that my ratings don't actually mean anything.

Recommendations (1/2)

This was written for a @mrs-captain-evans 2,5K followers Writing Challenge. Congratulations on the milestone and here’s for 2,5K more!

I chose “Well, this is awkward…” as my prompt because as I was scrolling through the options the scene that particular scene just jumped at me.

Summary: Twitter is a strange place. But once in a while, you connect with someone.

Word count: 3,564

Warning: mild language, 35 seconds of angst, could be less if you read it fast.

Warning2: there will be a lot of Trump bashing at the beginning of this story. If you’re offended then maybe this isn’t a story you should read.

Author’s Note:  All rules regarding verified accounts and how they behave were taken from Twitter.com.

It all started innocently enough.

Chris had opened Twitter to post a video of Dodger playing with his stuffed lion, knowing his dog was a fan favorite, when Trump decided to give his opinion on a National Geographic article about Global Warming.

GOD, he was a moron. A dumb, squinty-eyed, toupee wearing, orange moron. Chris seethed as he clicked on retweet with comment and called out the man he had the displeasure of calling President.

A few seconds later his notifications started to pop up. He switched tabs to Mentions and Replies where thousands of retweets with GIFs and other memes were pouring in before he filtered the tab so only verified accounts were shown. Mark retweeted his reply, Don wrote a snarky and an awesome comeback, Ellen Page tore the man a new one and an MIT professor he met during a flight home to Boston mentioned him and your account as prime examples of the generation who could make a change. He liked some favorites, retweeted a few others and was about to close the app when a new mention popped up, this time from your account, thanking your mentor and sharing a blurb about being cool because you were now linked to Captain America.

Curiosity got the best of him and Chris clicked on your handle. The header was a picture of Diagon Alley at the Warner Brother’s Harry Potter Tour in London and the picture to the side was of a woman dressed up as a Gryffindor student, wand, scarf and a pointed hat. He noticed you were also a verified account and your small bio read ‘Y/N, 30something.’, ‘You can be anything you aspire to be. I chose to be a nerd’ and ‘Director of Media Studies at MIT’.

That is an interesting combination, he thought while looking through your latest tweets. Chris immediately found your own retweet of the orange moron and he laughed when you called him a dweeb, deeming the man unworthy of being president of your dog’s agility class, much less president of your country. You also quoted him in a series of articles that could be found at the Congress Library website and citing other articles from different countries, asking him to please trade his Rich Richie comics for something an actual president needed to know ‘You know, like Obama’.

You had an incredibly sharp mind for a woman who spent her free time dressing up as a fictional character, he thought before shaking his head when he looked down at his costume. Yeah, better not judge.

Chris spent a good chunk of his downtime between takes that day going through your tweets. Every time his PA called him to block a new scene or to film a close-up, he would carefully lock the phone without closing the app so he wouldn’t have to scroll down again.

Later that day he was back on his trailer resting, they wouldn’t be going home that night till the first Thanos fight scene was over but he was now free of his Captain America clothes and could relax. He took a shower in the small trailer bathroom, put on a loose pair of boxers and picked up his phone again, opening the Twitter app, happy to see it was exactly where he left.

Chris was now looking at your tweets from two years ago. He scrolled down on some retweets, mostly articles about social media and its influence on people, thoughts about the latest Game of Thrones episode, a tweet about watching Captain America: The Winter Soldier again after the results of the presidential election and how it had changed your views of the movie and a trip to London to guest lecture on a seminar in Oxford, with a link to watch your lecture on Youtube.  You’re funny, witty, and after watching your lecture on Book to Movies Adaptions: Bridging the Gap in the Fourth Dimension, he realized he was enthralled not only by your pretty eyes and lush lips but also with your mind.

He saw pictures of your adopted one-eyed blue merle Cardigan Welsh Corgi aptly named Captain Hook which you confessed was rarely used because you liked to call him Hooker, calling his name out loud around Cambridge Square just to get a reaction out of people. He laughed long and hard imagining you walking up and down Tudor Street asking if anyone had seen a one-eyed Hooker prancing around.

He worried his bottom lip for a moment before closing the app and opening up Safari quickly founding what he was looking for on his saved links. A new window opened and Twitter.com was now on his screen but instead of the usual @chrisevans handle, the account belonged to @BostonBrains81.

The Patriots logo stared back at him from the top of the page and a random shot of the crowd in one of the home games stood over a simple bio: Boston. Beer. Patriots.

The account he used to interact with his friends back home, like their baby pictures, sign in to various sites and go even crazier over the Patriots than he normally would on his main.

He looked nervously around his trailer before he searched for your handle, clicking the follow button before he lost his courage.

You are now following @Y/H

Was he really going through with this? His index finger hovered over the reply button on your latest tweet, the one where he was also mentioned.

“Ok Chris, you can do this.”

BostonBrains81 @Y/H you’re a lot cooler than Captain America. Wicked answer to the resident Oompa-Loompa, but I gotta ask, you think he knows how to read?

There, he did it.

_

That had been the first of the many 280 characters conversations you had with each other.

At first, you wondered if he was just a creep that followed you because Professor Travis mentioned you and Chris Evans on the same post; you had gained almost a thousand followers because of that, but they quickly unfollowed you when you didn’t gush about Chris Evans or they realized you didn’t actually know the actor. Not @BostonBrains81 though, he stuck around, commenting on some old articles you shared, liking all the pictures of Hooker you posted and even replied to the one where you shared his name asking if calling out for a Hooker in Cambridge had you stopped for solicitation at any point. You laughed at his joke and decided to follow him back.

The guy, you assumed it was a guy, was incredibly intelligent, always had a smart comeback to your jokes and could make you laugh in less than 100 characters. You shared most of the same views, from politics to music and books, the only point of contention was football. He was probably the biggest Patriots fan you had ever met and you being originally from the west coast was a Seattle Seahawks fan. He told you he had a working buddy who was a huge Seahawks fan as well and they had watched the Superbowl together in Arizona a few years back.

He’d ask you for a new book recommendation every few weeks and confessed his line of work had him waiting around quite a bit. You believed he was a flight attendant because he more than once replied to you from different parts of the country. You wondered if you should let him know the location settings were turned on.

You quickly got into a routine of checking his page to see if he was online that day and a little over two months since you first ‘talked’, you moved on to Direct Messages and conversation become more serious. Thoughts on religion, the #MeToo movement, gay rights, all were candidly discussed and you now actively sought his opinions on some of the subjects you taught your classes.

For a flight attendant, the man had some strong opinions and knew how to keep a conversation going. You chastised yourself for your classism, just because he had a blue-collar job didn’t mean he couldn’t have a sophisticated mind.

Some people are incredibly well educated and never set foot inside a college corridor, you remembered Professor Travis lecturing an advanced Media class you sat as his aide. Take Captain America for an example, I met the young man who portrays the superhero during a recent flight from Atlanta to Boston and I was highly impressed. He could very well be a post-doctorate student here, but he chose to follow his own footsteps to Hollywood and I thank him for it. I quite enjoy the dichotomy he brings to his portrayal of Captain America and Steve Rogers during The Winter Soldier and Civil War. If you haven’t, please watch those movies as we’ll be discussing them in our next class.

Professor Travis had been your theses supervisor and was one of your closest friends, even though he was thirty years your senior. The man had one of the sharpest minds you knew and his classes on Comic Books and the Juxtaposition to Modern Politics was always full, with a waiting list that never got any smaller. You usually sat those classes as his aide and he called on you often to share your views on what the media contributed to the political storm brewing on the horizon and what comic books contributed to that. Captain America had become one of Travis favorite subjects as of late, the whole Hydra and Nazis making a comeback after the last presidential election.

The fact Chris Evans engaged in politics and wasn’t afraid to speak up his mind played a huge part in why you started following him after Professor Travis met the guy. Sure, the man was eye candy to your often-tired eyes but he had a lot to offer than just those huge biceps, that amazing tight ass, and that soft-looking facial hair. You got a kick of his self-deprecating humor and once or twice you had jointed down a few books he mentioned and truly enjoyed them.

It was a really nice coincidence @BostonBrains81 had read them as well.

By the end of summer you were feeling lonely and thinking of asking another professor out. You wanted a male opinion on the idea, preferably one not in the same circle of friends and your best online friend was just the person to ask.

Well, does he make you feel nervous?

No, why would he made me feel nervous? He’s a very nice guy.

See, if you’re not nervous around him that means he doesn’t make you feel anything. If you don’t feel anything for the guy, why waste your time? And a nice guy? God, that’s the worst thing a woman can say about a man. A nice guy is as bad as saying a girl is okay. Is she beautiful? Meh, she’s okay. Does he melt your insides? Meh, he’s a very nice guy.

Seems like you gave this a lot of thought.

I’ve had more girlfriends than… jobs. When I broke up with the last one, I decided to wait for the right woman instead of getting into another destined to fail relationship. There’s no shame in stepping back and deciding you’re worthy of more than just an okay girl.

Or a nice guy.

Exactly.

Being alone is not easy though. We jump from one relationship to the next because we’re already used to the normalcy of having that steady presence in our lives. It doesn’t matter if we know that person isn’t right for us or they might even be prejudicial for us in the long run. The relationship fills a void we don’t like, that feeling there’s something wrong with us because we can’t maintain a partner.

Who let you in my head when I wasn’t looking?

Sorry for getting too deep.

You’re absolutely right though.

Thanks for the talk, no dates with nice guys from now on.

Don’t go for the bad guys either.

Well, that considerably narrows the option pool. Who am I dating then?

How about me?

Good one funny boy.

What’s wrong with me?

Barring the fact that I don’t even know your real name and you could very well be catfishing me, not much.

Catfishing?

You know, trying to make me believe you’re someone you’re not.

.

You there?

Sorry. Yeah, I’m definitely not trying to make you believe I’m anyone but myself. Name’s Chris by the way.

Nice to meet you, Chris, I’m Y/N.

Your conversations with @BostonBrains81, better yet, Chris, were now a daily occurrence and included questions about your daily lives and personal family stuff, Chris had three siblings, the youngest had been adopted and you spent a whole afternoon discussing the effects of adoptions on both the family and the child, you commended his parents for going through the processes and he opened his heart about normalizing the girl when she first came to live with them but now she was his favorite sister and he couldn’t imagine life without Shanna in it. He told you about moving away from home at eighteen to pursue his dream job, you shared how difficult adapting to Boston was at first but how you couldn’t see yourself living anywhere else now. He confided in you his work had him burned out a little and how much he missed home. Since his location had been stationed in Atlanta for the past three weeks, you deduced he worked for Delta Airlines.

Hey, you there? Can we talk?

Sure, I’m just lounging, you good?

I’m still at work, everyone is being a dick today and I’m having a hard time coping, plus I’m tired and a little cranky.

I’m sorry. Coworkers can be a pain in the ass sometimes, no matter what the field. Have you tried the exercises you told me about?

Yes. More than once. They seem to work for a while but then I have to head back in and someone else decides it’s his turn to be a dick. And now the… execs are here and they want to change some of the stuff that’s already done so that means more work and more dick-headed people all around.

When it’s your turn?

Uh?

Well, since everyone is having a bad day, why can’t you lash out? Be a dick too?

It’s never my turn. Chris is always the good guy, Chris is never a diva.

You don’t need to be a diva to demand respect. Demand respect while being respectful, but put your foot down. The old you get more flies with honey. Do you need to be there?

I’m supposedly done for the day.

So go home, take a bath, sleep in clean sheets. I know how hard it is to turn off work, sometimes I stay in my office for hours after I’m my shift, but it��s not healthy. If they truly need you, they know where to find you.

They do yeah.

Go home, Chris. Pass on the shield.

What?

Like Captain America did in the comics. Let someone else do the job.

Oh. Okay, yeah, that makes sense.

I make a lot of sense when I’m drinking wine.

So your advice comes from your inebriated mind?

I’m hardly inebriated. It’s one glass of wine while reading a book in the bathtub. This is my me time.

I’m sorry for interrupting your naked me time. Thanks for the visual though, it’ll help me with my own time when I get home.

Go home, Chris. It’s the wine’s order.

You were now on a territory you swore you’d never slipped into; flirting with a stranger online. You tried to talk yourself out of it, tried to curb this insane idea manifesting inside your head and your heart, you were a scholar for goodness sake, you taught your students to never engage romantically online, therefore, you should know better.

You most certainly didn’t.

I’d like to take you out for coffee sometime, you could show me around MIT.

Maybe. When you get back from Atlanta, let me know.

How do you know I’m in Atlanta?

Your location setting is turned on.

Is it? Damn.

Yeah, I should have told you sooner. Working for Delta Airlines must nice though.

Yeah… I guess. Blue collar job though.

Don’t be like that, you should not be ashamed of what you do for a living. If it makes you happy, it’s all that matters.

You’re right, I’m pretty happy doing what I do. So, coffee?

Sure. I usually get my caffeine fix from ‘Bean there, Doughnut That’ over at Arrow St. It’s always full of students.

Smart girl, going for a place where you can find a friendly face if we don’t get along.

That, and you could be a serial killer, I need witnesses to remember your face. It’s not like I *really* know you.

I look forward to changing that. I’ll be home after Columbus Day. Could we meet then?

Yes, sure. I want to finally put a face to the man I’ve talking for the past four months. It’s a date.

A date uh? I like that. I like that very much. I hope you like my face when you see it, I kinda have an ugly mug.

I’m sure your face is fine. Besides, I already like your personality and that’s the part I always have trouble with.

Checking Twitter had become your new guilty pleasure and you’d close the app with a frown if Chris didn’t post anything every few days, exactly what was happening right now.

He had been offline for a whole week and you missed your usual banter, his witty sense of humor and how he took to calling you Professor Hottie. The Patriots lost the second game of the season and you wanted to gloat a little but most of all you just wanted to know if he was okay.

Biting your lip, you clicked on the direct message button.

Been a while since you’ve been online, did you get lost on the way back from Boston Market?

I see that you turned off your location sharing. Was I being too stalkerish?

I guess you’re busy or maybe you just don’t want to talk to me. I’ll leave you be.

Had you come on too strong? Did you sounded desperate and scared him off? You read your past conversations and nothing sounded too eager on your part, maybe he just wasn’t interested anymore.

Well, that was that.

You sighed and refreshed your home page one last time, checking your latest tweets and was surprised to see a new Tweet from Chris Evans, another Chris who had been MIA lately.

ChrisEvans Officially wrapped on Avengers 4. It was an emotional day, to say the least. Playing this role over the last 8 years has been an honor. To everyone in front of the camera, behind the camera, and in the audience, thank you for the memories! Eternally grateful.

Interacting with celebrities were never really your thing but you would miss Captain America, you were sure they would have to kill him if Evans would not play the iconic soldier anymore, so you took a chance and clicked on reply.

Y/H @chrisevans thanks for making Cap cool again, you made him justice and gave the tired soldier a new and improved multifaceted personality. We’re gonna miss him.

Satisfied with your chosen words you smiled as you hit send. You got a few likes notification right away, some of your students and MIT faculty retweeted your post, Professor Travis included.

ChrisEvans @y/h thank you. Having people like you and @TravisMIT giving Cap your stamp of approval certainly makes me think I did a good job.

Wide eyes blinked back to the screen when you read his response. He not only thanked you but for some reason he held your opinion to a higher standard? How was that possible?

Your mentions exploded with people asking you similar questions and you had to switch to verified account only to stop the barrage of notifications for new tweets coming through.

Your phone beeped with a new direct message and a small glimpse of hope that your Chris was back made you forget about Evans.

Hey, sorry for the disappearance act, work has been crazy lately. You’re definitely not stalkerish, that title actually belongs to yours truly but I’ll tell you more over coffee. Don’t ever think I don’t want to talk to you, our conversations are the highlight of my days. I missed you a lot these past ten days.

You cocked your head side to side while reading the message, twice, three times, trying to understand exactly what was going on. You should be happy, it was exactly what you wanted to read after being ghosted for over a week.

There was only one problem. The DM did not come from @BostonBrains81. It came from @ChrisEvans.

You hovered your mouse over the reply button but your brain was short-circuiting. You started and deleted dozens of replies, none of them conveying what you were feeling well enough. Deceived. Betrayed.

New direct messages appeared one after the other.

               Well, this is awkward…

               I can explain.

               Please talk to me.

               Look, I was stupid for not telling you sooner but doesn’t change how I feel about you. Can we talk? Please?

You’re now blocking @ChrisEvans.

You’re now blocking @BostonBrains81

Get to know me tag 🌙

I was tagged by the lovely @fourfinefreshfishforyou and @rosymiel . Thank you!

I tag @dafadolly  @early-grape  @simulationcowboy @bratsims @obi-uhie@crescentcrustacean @cupidlet @ridgeport @faaeish @herbalbrew and anyone else who would like to do it. (Also you dont have to do this if ya dont wanna. It’s a lot of questions lmao)

1. WHAT IS YOUR FULL NAME? Eliav somethin somethin

2. WHAT IS YOUR NICKNAME? Eli...?? I sometimes go by ben

3. BIRTHDAY? 1st of September

4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE BOOK SERIES? None

5. DO YOU BELIEVE IN ALIENS OR GHOSTS? Aliens probably

6. WHO IS YOUR FAVORITE AUTHOR? Toni Morrison or David Sedaris

7. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE RADIO STATION? NPR or this one french music station once awhile. 

8. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE FLAVOR OF ANYTHING? Ah either spicy anything or a nice fruity flavor with vanilla

9. WHAT WORD WOULD YOU USE OFTEN TO DESCRIBE SOMETHING GREAT OR WONDERFUL? “Oh Cool” or just literally great/wonderful

10. WHAT IS YOUR CURRENT FAVORITE SONG? Railroad Bill - Andrew Bird or Sabor a Mi - Kali Uchis

11. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE WORD? Orke / Gide or anythin with hard “ch” 

12. WHAT WAS THE LAST SONG YOU LISTENED TO? You Are The Light - Jens Lekman

13. WHAT TV SHOW WOULD YOU RECOMMEND FOR EVERYBODY TO WATCH? Uh Dark! I recently watched it and it was good!

14. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE MOVIE TO WATCH WHEN YOU’RE FEELING DOWN?  The Ritual. Its a good horror movie.

15. DO YOU PLAY VIDEO GAMES? Yes. But not like...hardcore? I dont like online multi player just like casual games. I will however become a hardcore gamer once I get my lil goblin hands on Red Dead Redemption 2. Yeehaw.

16. WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST FEAR? Idk why but I think it’s bad luck to name your fears out loud. 

17. WHAT IS YOUR BEST QUALITY, IN YOUR OPINION? Mm...Humour? 

18. WHAT IS YOUR WORST QUALITY, IN YOUR OPINION? I lack...empathy ...and have a very hard time relating to people

19. DO YOU LIKE CATS OR DOGS BETTER? I like both.

20. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SEASON? Autumn.

21. ARE YOU IN A RELATIONSHIP? No.

22. WHAT IS SOMETHING YOU MISS FROM YOUR CHILDHOOD? Being able to just be...loose? Just not have to worry about things.

23. WHO IS YOUR BEST FRIEND? I’d like to say my highschool “bestfriends” but we havent talked in a hot while.

24. WHAT IS YOUR EYE COLOR? Hazel

25. WHAT IS YOUR HAIR COLOR? Dirty Blonde

26. WHO IS SOMEONE YOU LOVE? Hm.

27. WHO IS SOMEONE YOU TRUST? No one lmao

28. WHO IS SOMEONE YOU THINK ABOUT OFTEN? Not a specific individual but just...people who’ve left my life? People I dont talk to or see. Just wonderin how life goes for them.

29. ARE YOU CURRENTLY EXCITED ABOUT/FOR SOMETHING? Uh, not in a longterm sense, but just being in the apartment alone and going to work.

30. WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST OBSESSION? Small deviances.

31. WHAT WAS YOUR FAVORITE TV SHOW AS A CHILD? Courage the Cowardly Dog, Hey, Arnold or Country Mouse City Mouse.

32. WHO OF THE OPPOSITE GENDER CAN YOU TELL ANYTHING TO, IF ANYONE? Hmm...No one? 

33. ARE YOU SUPERSTITIOUS? Somewhat.

34. DO YOU HAVE ANY UNUSUAL PHOBIAS? No.

35. DO YOU PREFER TO BE IN FRONT OF THE CAMERA OR BEHIND IT? Behind.

36. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE HOBBY? Gardening.

37. WHAT WAS THE LAST BOOK YOU READ? Calypso - David Sedaris

38. WHAT WAS THE LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED? Ballad of Buster Scruggs. 

39. WHAT MUSICAL INSTRUMENTS DO YOU PLAY, IF ANY? I used to play violin and clarinet.

40. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ANIMAL? Wombats.

41. WHAT ARE YOUR TOP 5 FAVORITE TUMBLR BLOGS THAT YOU FOLLOW? I like just sorta weird aesthetic blogs or overall blogs with no general direction.

42. WHAT SUPERPOWER DO YOU WISH YOU HAD? Shape-shifting or just like bein immortal but the kind where, if for example, my head were to be chopped off from my body, I’d just be a conscious, bastard head.

43. WHEN AND WHERE DO YOU FEEL MOST AT PEACE? In my room or a quiet cafe while it rains outside.

44. WHAT MAKES YOU SMILE? Small things. Nothin real specific

45. WHAT SPORTS DO YOU PLAY, IF ANY? I used to do track and lacrosse. I hated both.

46. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE DRINK? Lavender Lemonade or a Cappuccino. 

47. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU WROTE A HAND-WRITTEN LETTER OR NOTE TO SOMEBODY? Yesterday. I write post-cards to a ceramic teacher that I still keep in touch with. He’s a very funny man. 

48. ARE YOU AFRAID OF HEIGHTS? Depends.

49. WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST PET PEEVE? Sloppiness. Just general disorganization. (Also loud chewing)

50. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN TO A CONCERT? Yes.

51. ARE YOU VEGAN/VEGETARIAN? I dont generally eat heavy meats. Especially red because I vomit if I do. I eat a lot of fish though.

52. WHEN YOU WERE LITTLE, WHAT DID YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GREW UP? An Undertaker. I met one at a friends funeral, she was very interesting.

53. WHAT FICTIONAL WORLD WOULD YOU LIKE TO LIVE IN? Hmm. Maybe a rural-ized time locked town? Or a cabin in the middle of a foggy evergreen wood, not really fantasy I suppose.

54. WHAT IS SOMETHING YOU WORRY ABOUT? Health.

55. ARE YOU SCARED OF THE DARK? No.

56. DO YOU LIKE TO SING? If it’s a rock ballad in the middle a long road trip with friends, yes, but mostly I sing when alone.

57. HAVE YOU EVER SKIPPED SCHOOL? Yes. Alot.

58. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE PLACE ON THE PLANET? I’ve tiny places, or just moments that I enjoy.

59. WHERE WOULD YOU LIKE TO LIVE? A lot of places. Mostly rural.

60. DO YOU HAVE ANY PETS? Two Dogs. Zelda and Charlie.

61. ARE YOU MORE OF AN EARLY BIRD OR A NIGHT OWL? Night Owl.

62. DO YOU LIKE SUNRISES OR SUNSETS BETTER? Both.

63. DO YOU KNOW HOW TO DRIVE? No. Im gay.

64. DO YOU PREFER EARBUDS OR HEADPHONES? Earbuds.

65. HAVE YOU EVER HAD BRACES? Yes.

66. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE GENRE OF MUSIC? No specific genre.

67. WHO IS YOUR HERO? ...No one

68. DO YOU READ COMIC BOOKS? Not recently.

69. WHAT MAKES YOU THE MOST ANGRY? Selfishness.

70. DO YOU PREFER TO READ ON AN ELECTRONIC DEVICE OR WITH A REAL BOOK? Physical copies are nice. I like the smell.

71. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SUBJECT IN SCHOOL? I’m not in school but uh Math. Art.

72. DO YOU HAVE ANY SIBLINGS? 1

73. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU BOUGHT? Vanilla Extract.

74. HOW TALL ARE YOU? 179cm

75. CAN YOU COOK? Yes. I bake for a living. I make a mean puff pastry.

76. WHAT ARE THREE FOUR THINGS THAT YOU LOVE? Smelling spices, like cinnamon, red peppers, hard rain, when my dog snores.

77. WHAT ARE THREE THINGS THAT YOU HATE? Sweat, being yelled at, alcohol

78. DO YOU HAVE MORE FEMALE FRIENDS OR MORE MALE FRIENDS? More male identifying friends.

79. WHAT IS YOUR SEXUAL ORIENTATION? Bi. More lenient towards male identifying individuals.

80. WHERE DO YOU CURRENTLY LIVE? The US.

81. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TEXTED? My Manager.

82. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED? Thursday.

83. WHO IS YOUR FAVORITE YOUTUBER? None really. Just the weird video once awhile. Like “will it blend.”

84. DO YOU LIKE TO TAKE SELFIES? Yes and no.

85. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE APP? ????

86. WHAT IS YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH YOUR PARENT(S) LIKE? I get along with my mother when I can. Father could be dead for all I care.

87. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE FOREIGN ACCENT? Any accent.

88. WHAT IS A PLACE THAT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO, BUT YOU WANT TO VISIT? Too many places

89. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE NUMBER? I like 8 I suppose

90. CAN YOU JUGGLE? No.

91. ARE YOU RELIGIOUS? I was raised under a Jewish household, but as I’ve gotten older and more bitter, I’ve grown out of faith. However, I still identify as Jewish.

92. DO YOU FIND OUTER SPACE OR THE DEEP OCEAN TO BE MORE INTERESTING? Yes and Yes.

93. DO YOU CONSIDER YOURSELF TO BE A DAREDEVIL? Sometimes. Depends.

94. ARE YOU ALLERGIC TO ANYTHING? Peanuts.

95. CAN YOU CURL YOUR TONGUE? Yes.

96. CAN YOU WIGGLE YOUR EARS? No.

97. HOW OFTEN DO YOU ADMIT THAT YOU WERE WRONG ABOUT SOMETHING? If I act wrongly to someone I apologize right away.

98. DO YOU PREFER THE FOREST OR THE BEACH? Both.

99. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE PIECE OF ADVICE THAT ANYONE HAS EVER GIVEN YOU? None.

100. ARE YOU A GOOD LIAR? Yes.

101. WHAT IS YOUR HOGWARTS HOUSE? Ravenclaw?

102. DO YOU TALK TO YOURSELF? Once awhile.

103. ARE YOU AN INTROVERT OR AN EXTROVERT? Introvert.

104. DO YOU KEEP A JOURNAL/DIARY? Not anymore.

105. DO YOU BELIEVE IN SECOND CHANCES? Yes and No. If its absolutely awful, then I’m quick to cut ties.

106. IF YOU FOUND A WALLET FULL OF MONEY ON THE GROUND, WHAT WOULD YOU DO? If there’s cash, take it. Return everything else. Sorry. 

107. DO YOU BELIEVE THAT PEOPLE ARE CAPABLE OF CHANGE? Yes. As long as they keep accountability for there actions. 

108. ARE YOU TICKLISH? In certain areas, but hardly.

109. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN ON A PLANE? Yes.

110. DO YOU HAVE ANY PIERCINGS? I did, but they closed up.

111. WHAT FICTIONAL CHARACTER DO YOU WISH WAS REAL? None really.

112. DO YOU HAVE ANY TATTOOS? No.

113. WHAT IS THE BEST DECISION THAT YOU’VE MADE IN YOUR LIFE SO FAR? Seeing a psychologist.

114. DO YOU BELIEVE IN KARMA? Somewhat.

115. DO YOU WEAR GLASSES OR CONTACTS? Yes.

116. DO YOU WANT CHILDREN? Probably.

117. WHO IS THE SMARTEST PERSON YOU KNOW? The best friends I havent talked to in a while.

118. WHAT IS YOUR MOST EMBARRASSING MEMORY? There’s a lot.

119. HAVE YOU EVER PULLED AN ALL-NIGHTER? Yes.

120. WHAT COLOR ARE MOST OF YOU CLOTHES? Black. Earth tones. Problem Patterns.

121. DO YOU LIKE ADVENTURES? Sometimes

122. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN ON TV? Yes.

123. HOW OLD ARE YOU? 19

124. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE QUOTE? None.

125. DO YOU PREFER SWEET OR SAVORY FOODS? Both

Well, that went quickly...

What day is it? I’m starting to lose track of how long I’ve been here...

Well, it’s been a week since my last post, and it seems that a lot must have happened, but honestly I feel like I’ve just been cranking through a bunch of comic books.

But I do know that Friday and Saturday involved a good deal excitement, so I guess we had might as well pick up pretty much where we left off!

Last Friday was Orientation for ICB, which meant getting all of the 35-40 instructors, 10 staff members, and the 6-8 people in charge of this program together in a room to introduce us to...basically what we’d been doing all that week. Also, aside from a couple study-abroad-undergrads and my officemate and me, everyone there had probably already heard the spiel.

It was scheduled from 5p-6p with a buffett afterwards, but a bunch of the Communications people from my floor were going out to eat (again?) afterwards, so I made plans with NR. She wanted to try this Mexican restaurant in what I’ll describe as the “international district” of Beijing. Most everything around us when we got there looked like it belonged in literally every metropolitan area in the world. Every major brand you can imagine had a store. Multiple. Too many...

But the Mexican restaurant we visited is owned and managed by a Mexican expat, apparently. He even stopped by our table to ask how the food was, and let me tell you: that quesadilla was the BOMB!!! And the margarita was pretty good (not as good as MHO’C’s, though!). By the time we finished up dinner, it was kind of late, so we wondered around the shopping center, found a bookstore. You know: the usual.

Fun fact: when a store or restaurant wants to indicate to their patrons that they are getting ready to close, they play smooth jazz and turn the lights down. Like for real. Had their not been windows open to the pavilion outside with it’s hundreds of light displays, I would have been seriously concerned when the lights in the place just went out and Kenny G popped up on the speakers.

We entertained the idea of finding the cinema nearby to see Alita Battle Angel, but during the 15 minutes that we spent wondering around in search of the complex, it seemed to elude us. Plus it was getting close to that time when the subway shuts down, and I wasn’t exactly hankering for a taxi ride this early in my stay....if at all.

The next morning, I got up early to meet back up with NR at the National Museum near the Forbidden City. Now, for the most part, the stairs I get don’t bother me. But I will say, if you’re going to stair at the pasty white guy with a hard-to-describe-its-color-accurately-beard, maybe don’t do it when you’re going 15 mph on a bike, facing in the wrong direction! *sigh.....Some people’s kids...

But what really bothered me, especially at the time, was the father-of-three who straight-up filmed me on his phone from 5 feet away for a solid 6 minutes, three hallways, and two escalators! I get it, I’m funny looking. But I really think I a picture would have done just fine...

One of the things that bothered me the most about that experience was that (a) he had a shit-eating grin plastered on his face, (b) his daughters seemed rather embarrassed, (c) he filmed me with the screen aimed at me so I could watch myself on his phone, (d) there was text on the screen, and (e) it went on for a solid 6 minutes.

In hindsight, I was wearing sunglasses and a hat, in a subway system, in the morning, heading to the center of Beijing. Maybe he thought I was a celebrity? I had spoken to a Communications graduate student the other day who happens to be black, and he told me the story of how a citizen here pull out their phone with a picture of Samuel L. Jackson on it, and gestured to him as it to ask if it were him...even though SLJ is for sure at 70 years old and this kid is no more than 35. And he looks 25. #smh

Anyway, after dealing with whatever the hell that was, I got to visit the museum! They, for whatever reason, were not allowing people to bring their charging blocks into the museum (external battery that you can use to charge your cell phone and other devices on-the-go), but more surprising to me was just how many people carried one with them! At least, it was surprising until I took a moment to think about it. As I’ve mentioned before, basically every payment made in Beijing is through WeChat, which needs internet access, so I guess it shouldn’t be too surprising. You also really can’t navigate through the city with some sort of Maps app; there are just too many bus routes, train routes, terminals and stops to keep logged in your head.

As far as the museum itself goes, the gifts to China from foreign governments exhibit and the Ancient China exhibit themselves took most of the day. Also, no surprise: the gift that took up the most floor space was given by a U.S. President. I also got a refresher in 8th Grade Social Studies. Too many small countries to remember all of them, and that space made me feel somewhat moronic.

The Ancient China exhibit was exceptional, though. They broke up the last, oh...750,000 years of human-ish life in China into 8-10 separate eras, the first few cataloguing the life and evolution of Homo erectus pekinensis into Homo sapien, while the latter eras were segregated dynastically. I’ve never seen the progression of human evolution laid out in such detail! The rock tools became better rock tools, then pottery and paper, stamps, buildings and so much more! There were even ceremonial helmets that would put the Juggernaut to shame!

It was strange, though, to have all of this knowledge just beyond my fingertips both literally and figuratively. The literal sense isn’t too shocking, as I’ve been to a museum before and know not to touch the pieces, but to have placards written in a language that would take years to learn was frustrating. Fortunately, NR has a never-ending supply of patience, and she translated much of the text. She even quizzed me on several of the characters. I’ve worked out how to write “rock” for sure.

After the museum, we wondered over to a nearby mall that, honestly, puts the Mall of America to shame. No joke. This place was huge! It just kept going and going and going! There was a particular alley that has all of the “exotic foods” that you might see on The Amazing Race, which I haven’t tried yet but intend to, but the rest is mostly-outdoor shopping center. Our reason for being there was to find food (we had been in the museum for a bit over 7 hours), and then sit our fine asses down in a movie theater to watch Alita.

We found a restaurant that served food traditionally found where NR grew up. It was exceptional. And the beer just made it better. :P

The movie experience was something else entirely. I’ve gotten used to watching television and movies with subtitles so that, when people decide to talk to me, I can follow along with both bits. Or if people are just talking near me while I’m watching television, I don’t have to rewind the show. That helped a lot; the movie was still spoken in English, but there were Chinese subtitles. I recognized the Chinese character for “1″ frequently enough, but that was about it.

The movie itself was way more than I expected. I shouldn’t be surprised, given that one of the primary characters is played by Christoph Waltz. If you haven’t seen it yet, you should definitely consider it.

Also, additional fun fact: I’m thinking that most (if not all) showings of major motion pictures here are in 3D. *shrug* Side note: we’re going to see Captain Marvel tomorrow and I’M SO FREAKIN’ EXCITED!!!!

After the movie, we wandered back to the subway station and parted ways mid-subway-ride to head home. The next day I spent playing Kingdom Hearts 3 and sipping some beer in the 3rd Floor Lounge. All day. It was blissful.

This workweek has consisted of four main things: teaching responsibilities, a bit of dissertation work, trying out another one of the cafeterias on campus, and reading comic books. Oh, and beer. But that kind of goes without saying, doesn’t it? There’s a convenience store on the other side of the building in front of the Guest House that has cans of beer. You can buy them individual for 3 yuan, or roughly 45 cents. I won’t lie to you: I bought 12 of them and it didn’t cost me more than 6 bucks. And it’s really not bad, and even more convenient than the liquor store I lived by in Denver.

Anyway, as I said, I’m going to see Captain Marvel tomorrow, then to “W-Town” (originally Watertown...so glad they shortened it...) in northern Beijing, which sits at the base of part of the Great Wall. More than 20 people from ICB will be heading up to their on Saturday, so I imagine one of them will take pictures. Probably ML or S. So you’ll have those to look forward to since you know I won’t be taking any!

Oh!!! I almost forgot the biggest thing that happened this week! Actually, it might be the biggest news of my entire stay!!!

I did laundry.

And I washed my slippers. I’m not convinced that they’ve stopped smelling, but I’m holding out hope that I’ve finally figured out how to resolve an issue that I know humanity has been seriously struggling with for decades. I’m on the verge of a breakthrough, people, I swear!

Anyway, time to finish this beer, read a bit more of Scott Lynch’s Republic of Thieves (WE FINALLY FIND OUT ABOUT SABETHA!!!!), and head to bed. Big couple of days ahead...

Sláinte,

BeardyAllen

P.S. I bet you thought I was gonna forget! After class on Wednesday, I worked out how to make a phone call from here to the States to wish my Mom a Happy BIrthday. Caught her at work, and we got to chat for a good long while. It really put a nice cap on my evening, and it seemed it gave her a good start to her day. Anyway, I hope you had a great evening, found something nice at C&B and enjoyed that glass of wine you mentioned! Love you!!

get to know me tag!

tagged by @literalite (thank u lamer clone!) n im not tagging anyone bc.............. every1 i think i know has already been tagged so thats calm, there r 125 questions below!

1. WHAT IS YOUR FULL NAME? Pat[REDACTED] [REDACTED] [REDACTED] [REDACTED] [REDACTED] [REDACTED] [REDACTED] [REDACTED]

2. WHAT IS YOUR NICKNAME? pat

3. BIRTHDAY? 23rd of nov!!!!! <3 (2001)

4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE BOOK SERIES? hmhmhnnnn,,,,, lotr, the hobbit, harry potter, anything from the grishaverse,,, idk man i like books a lot,,, the raven cycle,,, hnmgmg,,

5. DO YOU BELIEVE IN ALIENS OR GHOSTS? aliens 100% i believe in them! ghosts? i mean... i half kind of do half dont but my kind of ghost aint the same as the usual idea of a ghost yanno? mine r nicer <3

6. WHO IS YOUR FAVORITE AUTHOR? leigh bardugo, tolkien, i would say j.k rowling but shes trash! her books r good tho ://

7. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE RADIO STATION? ??? idk so im gon pretend this means podcast and in that case im listening to the black tapes rn! 

8. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE FLAVOR OF ANYTHING? matcha or strawberry!!!!!!

9. WHAT WORD WOULD YOU USE OFTEN TO DESCRIBE SOMETHING GREAT OR WONDERFUL? thats swag (i began using it ironically but now i cant stop)

10. WHAT IS YOUR CURRENT FAVORITE SONG? uhhh eve or the wonderful world by mark joshua! orrr shiloh by little chief!! 

11. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE WORD? grinned

12. WHAT WAS THE LAST SONG YOU LISTENED TO?  walking back to georgia by jim croce

13. WHAT TV SHOW WOULD YOU RECOMMEND FOR EVERYBODY TO WATCH? honestly.... drop dead diva... im sorry.... but tbh i dont watch tv all that often!! ACTUALLUY HECK i would def recommend merlin the bbc tv series and ofc sherlock the tv series but keep in mind both those recs will rip out your heart MULTIPLE times,

14. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE MOVIE TO WATCH WHEN YOU’RE FEELING DOWN? .......... im down all the time lolol but tbh all the harry potter films + the 1st fantastic beasts movie, all the lotr films and all the hobbit films AND sherlock both the rdj and jude law films and then the bbc sherlock christmas special the abominable bride

15. DO YOU PLAY VIDEO GAMES? yah! my all time favourite game is tes oblivion!! it has been my fav since i was 6!

16. WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST FEAR? my life not working out the way i want to!! i want my life to be happy and long and spent with the people i love and not having 2 worry abt money or health!!!

17. WHAT IS YOUR BEST QUALITY, IN YOUR OPINION? i think maybe my ability to find everything funny??

18. WHAT IS YOUR WORST QUALITY, IN YOUR OPINION? my temper is beyond vicious honestly like im not kidding my temper is.... disgusting

19. DO YOU LIKE CATS OR DOGS BETTER? birds

20. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SEASON? winter

21. ARE YOU IN A RELATIONSHIP? nah!

22. WHAT IS SOMETHING YOU MISS FROM YOUR CHILDHOOD? im still a kid im only 17!!! and uh,, i miss the innocence!! i miss being oblivious!!

23. WHO IS YOUR BEST FRIEND? i dont have one!

24. WHAT IS YOUR EYE COLOR? brownn w/ a bit of green!

25. WHAT IS YOUR HAIR COLOR? dark brown!

26. WHO IS SOMEONE YOU LOVE? my parents and my family!

27. WHO IS SOMEONE YOU TRUST? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

28. WHO IS SOMEONE YOU THINK ABOUT OFTEN? jude law, sebastian stan, emma stone

29. ARE YOU CURRENTLY EXCITED ABOUT/FOR SOMETHING? back to school shopping!! also i get to eat fried chicken and cheesecake tonight because even tho my birthday was yesterday im celebrating it today!!!!

30. WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST OBSESSION? stationery??? video games?? FOOD??

31. WHAT WAS YOUR FAVORITE TV SHOW AS A CHILD? jane and the dragon!

32. WHO OF THE OPPOSITE GENDER CAN YOU TELL ANYTHING TO, IF ANYONE? i dont know what a male is sorry

33. ARE YOU SUPERSTITIOUS? a baby bit only

34. DO YOU HAVE ANY UNUSUAL PHOBIAS? n’aw i dont think so!

35. DO YOU PREFER TO BE IN FRONT OF THE CAMERA OR BEHIND IT? i mean... if i weren’t as ugly as i am id love to be in front of a camera doing fun acting stuff or whatnot! but bc i am ugly im usually behind the camera + i do film at school!

36. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE HOBBY? lettering/calligraphy!

37. WHAT WAS THE LAST BOOK YOU READ? what if its us by becky abertalli + adam silvera (its so cute but the ending was.... not satisfactory...)

38. WHAT WAS THE LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED? fantastic beasts the crimes of grindelwald!!!

39. WHAT MUSICAL INSTRUMENTS DO YOU PLAY, IF ANY? used 2 play piano, accordion, and violin! but i dont do tht anymore!

40. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ANIMAL? bird!! 

41. WHAT ARE YOUR TOP 5 FAVORITE TUMBLR BLOGS THAT YOU FOLLOW? too many 2 pick from !!! im srry!

42. WHAT SUPERPOWER DO YOU WISH YOU HAD? gdgs all of them!!!!! maybe the power to warp reality bc i could do anything then?? a reality where im married to jude law or emma stone? done, a reality where i have all the powers in the world? done

43. WHEN AND WHERE DO YOU FEEL MOST AT PEACE? a cliff somewhere where its cold and the water is vicious underneath!

44. WHAT MAKES YOU SMILE? babies, animals, happy couples, pregnant people, old people, a lot of things really!

45. WHAT SPORTS DO YOU PLAY, IF ANY? i used 2 do karate but now i dont do sports!

46. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE DRINK? idfsng idk! strawberry milkshake maybe?? matcha boba??? milk!!

47. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU WROTE A HAND-WRITTEN LETTER OR NOTE TO SOMEBODY? last week!!! i love handwriting!

48. ARE YOU AFRAID OF HEIGHTS? nah!

49. WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST PET PEEVE? ppl who r rude for no reason and also ppl at school who just pick on other ppl for no reason looking at you rahni teagan and the other f*ckheads!!! hope u die literally i know thats a horrible thing to say but you all deserve it

50. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN TO A CONCERT? i went to two twenty one pilot concerts!! the first one was in the forum in melbourne and then the other one was a few years or one year later and it was in a sold out stadium!! both were in the mosh! and then idk if this counts as a concert but i went to and did the meet and greet for dan and phil’s first tour! i dont like them anymore tho ! ://

51. ARE YOU VEGAN/VEGETARIAN? no way in HELL!!!!

52. WHEN YOU WERE LITTLE, WHAT DID YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GREW UP? a lot of things!!! famous actress, spy, war general, prime minister, pro wrestler, explorer, cartographer, filmmaker, architect, interior designer, dragon, PIRATE

53. WHAT FICTIONAL WORLD WOULD YOU LIKE TO LIVE IN? i know this is a bad idea but honestly the harry potter universe PROVIDED i had magic!! bc like,,, yah

54. WHAT IS SOMETHING YOU WORRY ABOUT? a lot of things! my future mainly lol :(

55. ARE YOU SCARED OF THE DARK? no but i gotta say sometimes in the middle of the night when i wake up and the undefined shape my clothes sitting on my desk chair looks like That i get a bit worried yanno it looks like a demon im not gonna lie

56. DO YOU LIKE TO SING? ya but i dont htink im any good at it!

57. HAVE YOU EVER SKIPPED SCHOOL? only due to sickness, funerals, or holidays!

58. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE PLACE ON THE PLANET? my house! OR the cliffs of moher :o)

59. WHERE WOULD YOU LIKE TO LIVE? in some old old old european castle in the middle of nowhere on a mountain and next to the sea

60. DO YOU HAVE ANY PETS? nuu :( but i do feed a lot of birds that come to my house and ive named them and love them even if the lorikeets dont love me back which is fine!!!! :(

61. ARE YOU MORE OF AN EARLY BIRD OR A NIGHT OWL? early bird i guess

62. DO YOU LIKE SUNRISES OR SUNSETS BETTER? sunsets??

63. DO YOU KNOW HOW TO DRIVE? yes! but i dont have my full lisence only my learner’s permit!!

64. DO YOU PREFER EARBUDS OR HEADPHONES? headphones (noise cancelling!!)

65. HAVE YOU EVER HAD BRACES? yup!! they were green!!

66. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE GENRE OF MUSIC? soft rock, indie folk, indie-everything mainly except for indie-rock,,, country music dont hate my i love country music as long as its certain country music!! aint having none of this keith urban rubbish in my house!! we only listen 2 the james taylor brand of country music in this house!!! so i guess country folk. folk music in general is my jam!!! i love ballads as well and ofc blues!! theres so many more jbdsgjbas but i cant possibly list all of it!!!

67. WHO IS YOUR HERO? the idea of me living out the future i want if that makes sense!

68. DO YOU READ COMIC BOOKS? yah!!

69. WHAT MAKES YOU THE MOST ANGRY? a lot of things honestly!!!! 2 many to list im really passionate!

70. DO YOU PREFER TO READ ON AN ELECTRONIC DEVICE OR WITH A REAL BOOK? real book but i read more on electronic devices bc its easy and i dont have to worry about lights !!

71. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SUBJECT IN SCHOOL? idk!!!!!!!! maybe history!

72. DO YOU HAVE ANY SIBLINGS? nup!! im an only child thanK GOD

73. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU BOUGHT? movie tickets to crimes against grindelwald last night!!

74. HOW TALL ARE YOU? i think im like 176cm??

75. CAN YOU COOK? only if i have a recipe! but i can make really good drinks (non alcoholic ofc!!)

76. WHAT ARE THREE THINGS THAT YOU LOVE? rainy weather, good literature, my family

77. WHAT ARE THREE THINGS THAT YOU HATE? hubris, wrath, pococurantism

78. DO YOU HAVE MORE FEMALE FRIENDS OR MORE MALE FRIENDS? female

79. WHAT IS YOUR SEXUAL ORIENTATION? ?????????? who knows

80. WHERE DO YOU CURRENTLY LIVE? australia!!

81. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TEXTED? my group chat

82. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED? my birthday yesterday lol

83. WHO IS YOUR FAVORITE YOUTUBER? dont want youtube tht much anymore tbh

84. DO YOU LIKE TO TAKE SELFIES? nah

85. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE APP? procreate

86. WHAT IS YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH YOUR PARENT(S) LIKE? incredibly close with both parents but fight with my dad like cats n dogs

87. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE FOREIGN ACCENT? irish or strong strong american or posh english also scottish

88. WHAT IS A PLACE THAT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO, BUT YOU WANT TO VISIT? israel, republic of ireland, and so many more places like nksgskbgs i cant list them also all the nordic countries

89. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE NUMBER? 3

90. CAN YOU JUGGLE? no

91. ARE YOU RELIGIOUS? nah 

92. DO YOU FIND OUTER SPACE OF THE DEEP OCEAN TO BE MORE INTERESTING? both!!!!!! 

93. DO YOU CONSIDER YOURSELF TO BE A DAREDEVIL? daring in terms of i like to do things that could potentially kill me for the adrenaline rush but not daring in terms of introducing myself to other ppl lol

94. ARE YOU ALLERGIC TO ANYTHING? nah thank GOD

95. CAN YOU CURL YOUR TONGUE? oui

96. CAN YOU WIGGLE YOUR EARS? non

97. HOW OFTEN DO YOU ADMIT THAT YOU WERE WRONG ABOUT SOMETHING? ill happily admit i’m wrong provided the other person wasnt a douchebag about it but even then ill admit im wrong! aint no shame in recognising ur wrong ma dude

98. DO YOU PREFER THE FOREST OR THE BEACH? dont like the beach but i love the sea?? so forest i guess bc i dont like sand

99. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE PIECE OF ADVICE THAT ANYONE HAS EVER GIVEN YOU? "two things stand like stone, kindness in another’s trouble, courage in your own” - adam lindsay gordon

100. ARE YOU A GOOD LIAR? an excellent one, but i dislike lying and value honesty so!!

101. WHAT IS YOUR HOGWARTS HOUSE? ssssss slytherin!

102. DO YOU TALK TO YOURSELF? ya

103. ARE YOU AN INTROVERT OR AN EXTROVERT? cop out answer here but it depends on the situation

104. DO YOU KEEP A JOURNAL/DIARY? yes

105. DO YOU BELIEVE IN SECOND CHANCES? depends

106. IF YOU FOUND A WALLET FULL OF MONEY ON THE GROUND, WHAT WOULD YOU DO? try and find the owner and track em down but if i cant ill hand it in to the place where it was lost

107. DO YOU BELIEVE THAT PEOPLE ARE CAPABLE OF CHANGE? yes

108. ARE YOU TICKLISH? yes

109. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN ON A PLANE? yes

110. DO YOU HAVE ANY PIERCINGS? ears but theyre closed up!!

111. WHAT FICTIONAL CHARACTER DO YOU WISH WAS REAL? thorin oakenshield

112. DO YOU HAVE ANY TATTOOS? nah

113. WHAT IS THE BEST DECISION THAT YOU’VE MADE IN YOUR LIFE SO FAR? ? idk man

114. DO YOU BELIEVE IN KARMA? no, too many bad people are living good lives right now

115. DO YOU WEAR GLASSES OR CONTACTS? nope! perfect vision here my dude!

116. DO YOU WANT CHILDREN? in the future i want 1 child only

117. WHO IS THE SMARTEST PERSON YOU KNOW? my little cousin

118. WHAT IS YOUR MOST EMBARRASSING MEMORY? a Lot

119. HAVE YOU EVER PULLED AN ALL-NIGHTER? a few times only, but i value sleep

120. WHAT COLOR ARE MOST OF YOU CLOTHES? black and green

121. DO YOU LIKE ADVENTURES? hell ya !

122. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN ON TV? audience member for the xfactor!

123. HOW OLD ARE YOU? 17

124. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE QUOTE? “so comes snow after fire, and even dragons have their endings.” -tolkien OR “always seek the giant.”

125. DO YOU PREFER SWEET OR SAVORY FOODS? savoury

-Get to Know Me-

Find the icons HERE :)

SOOO the point is to make a simself (yup, that sim up there is me) and put your traits, things you like and whatever you wanna share. You don’t have to do it if you don’t want to! After the keep reading thingy are +100 questions I found that you can answer if you want, but you don’t have to (it’s tiring as hell) . . . 1. What is your full name? Christopher 2. What is your nickname? Topher, NEM, Plaisha 3. Birthday? August 9th 4. What is your favorite book series? Xanth book series by Piers Anthony 5. Do you believe in aliens or ghosts? Aliens I need a bit more proof on but Ghosts, yes. 6. Who is your favorite author? H.P. Lovecraft 7. What is your favorite radio station? Creepypasta podcast 8. What is your favorite flavor of anything? Cinnamon 9. What word would you use often to describe something great or wonderful? “killer” 10. What is your current favorite song? “Breathe” by Through Fire 11. What is your favorite word? Monsterful 12. What was the last song you listened to?   “Dirty Diana” by Shamans Harvest 13. What TV show would you recommend for everybody to watch? Chuck 14. What is your favorite movie to watch when you’re feeling down? Anything in the Horror Genre. 15. Do you play video games? Yeah. 16. What is your biggest fear? Silence. 17. What is your best quality, in your opinion? I am a great listener. 18. What is your worst quality, in your opinion? PTSD Episodes 19. Do you like cats or dogs better? Dogs, but I wouldn’t reject a Cat. 20. What is your favorite season? Autumn 21. Are you in a relationship? Yes. 22. What is something you miss from your childhood? My little pony and He-Man XD 23. Who is your best friend? His name is Eric. 24. What is your eye color? They change but sit mostly in the hazel to amber range. 25. What is your hair color? Dark Brown 26. Who is someone you love? My husband 27. Who is someone you trust? Not many, mostly my husband. 28. Who is someone you think about often? My mom. 29. Are you currently excited about/for something? Not really. 30. What is your biggest obsession? Art. 31. What was your favorite TV show as a child? He-Man or Magic School Bus 32. Who of the opposite gender can you tell anything to, if anyone? Sounds funny but my EX. 33. Are you superstitious? No. 34. Do you have any unusual phobias? Sedatephobia, and Trypophobia 35. Do you prefer to be in front of the camera or behind it? Behind it. 36. What is your favorite hobby? Photography, Art, the sims. 37. What was the last book you read? The Watchmaker of Filigree Street 38. What was the last movie you watched? Hold the Dark 39. What musical instruments do you play, if any? Guitar and Keyboard 40. What is your favorite animal? Llama’s and Sloths. 41. What are your top 5 favorite Tumblr blogs that you follow? @scelesticsimsstuff @nolan-sims​ @mysteriousdane​ @slythersim​ @wardenofmyheart​ @grimcookies​ @quirkykyimu​ @gerbits​ theres a lot TBH 42. What superpower do you wish you had? Time Travel 43. When and where do you feel most at peace? At night eating Nachos. LOL 44. What makes you smile? Dirty Jokes or people with my sick sense of humor 45. What sports do you play, if any? I don’t sport. 46. What is your favorite drink? Black Tea 47. When was the last time you wrote a hand-written letter or note to somebody? Early Middle School 48. Are you afraid of heights? To a degree, Yes. 49. What is your biggest pet peeve? Depends on my mood greatly. 50. Have you ever been to a concert? Many. 51. Are you vegan/vegetarian? Used to be. 52. When you were little, what did you want to be when you grew up? An Interior Decorator. 53. What fictional world would you like to live in? Tuck Everlastings 54. What is something you worry about? Life. 55. Are you scared of the dark? Depends on my mood. 56. Do you like to sing? I used to, too much negative feedback. 57. Have you ever skipped school? Yes, a few times. 58. What is your favorite place on the planet? I want off this planet. 59. Where would you like to live? The wilderness 60. Do you have any pets? A chinchilla and two Cockatiels 61. Are you more of an early bird or a night owl? Night Owl 62. Do you like sunrises or sunsets better? Sunsets. 63. Do you know how to drive? Yes. in the USA and Ireland. 64. Do you prefer earbuds or headphones? Earbuds 65. Have you ever had braces? No 66. What is your favorite genre of music? My music taste is quite eclectic, I don’t like Mumble rappers....lol 67. Who is your hero? My Grandfather was. 68. Do you read comic books? Yes, whos asking? 69. What makes you the most angry? The Two I’s, Ignorance and Intolerance. 70. Do you prefer to read on an electronic device or with a real book? eBook if I can, but paperback is Cathartic. 71. What is your favorite subject in school? Science and Economics 72. Do you have any siblings? Sister 73. What was the last thing you bought? sweats and animal treats. 74. How tall are you? 5′8, I am short for my species...lol 75. Can you cook? Learning to 76. What are three things that you love? My Husband, My pets, my nephews and niece. 77. What are three things that you hate? Ignorance, Intolerance, and Injustice 78. Do you have more female friends or more male friends? I have like 3 friends IRL, 1 male 2 female. 79. What is your sexual orientation? Bisexual with a lean towards Men  80. Where do you currently live? Washington State 81. Who was the last person you texted? Kailey 82. When was the last time you cried? When I found out my cousin was going to be a paraplegic for the rest of his life  83. Who is your favorite YouTuber? No idea too many to name 84. Do you like to take selfies? eh not really 85. What is your favorite app? Pinterest 86. What is your relationship with your parent(s) like? Mom has passed but we were really close and my dad has issues so visits are limited. 87. What is your favorite foreign accent? A cross between Scottish and English 88. What is a place that you’ve never been to, but you want to visit? New Zealand 89. What is your favorite number? 11 90. Can you juggle? No lol 91. Are you religious? No, I am an Atheist 92. Do you find outer space of the deep ocean to be more interesting? Terrifying and exciting at the same time. 93. Do you consider yourself to be a daredevil? No 94. Are you allergic to anything? Penicillin 95. Can you curl your tongue? yus 96. Can you wiggle your ears? That would be a no 97. How often do you admit that you were wrong about something? Right, until proven wrong. 98. Do you prefer the forest or the beach? forest 99. What is your favorite piece of advice that anyone has ever given you? “It isn't the falling down in life, its staying down that damns you” 100. Are you a good liar? In person No 101. What is your Hogwarts House? Ravenclaw 102. Do you talk to yourself? Yes 103. Are you an introvert or an extrovert? Omnivert 104. Do you keep a journal/diary? No 105. Do you believe in second chances? Really situationally 106. If you found a wallet full of money on the ground, what would you do? Depends where I was but turn it in somewhere safe 107. Do you believe that people are capable of change? Yes, but it seems to be rare 108. Are you ticklish? somtimes in certain places 109. Have you ever been on a plane? Yes 110. Do you have any piercings? Ears Gauge 00, Right nostril...wanting to get my left nostril done too. 111. What fictional character do you wish was real? Cthulhu -evil grin- 112. Do you have any tattoos? Yes 113. What is the best decision that you’ve made in your life so far? Going back to school 114. Do you believe in karma? No 115. Do you wear glasses or contacts? Contacts 116. Do you want children? Someday 117. Who is the smartest person you know? My husband 118. What is your most embarrassing memory? I can only pick one? 119. Have you ever pulled an all-nighter? yes, more than once 120. What color are most of you clothes? black 121. Do you like adventures? LOVE 122. Have you ever been on TV? Yes, cable tv show, when I was 5 or 6 reading Green Eggs and Ham, with Dr suess 123. How old are you? 31 124. What is your favorite movie quote? “You have no power over me” 125. Do you prefer sweet or savory foods? savory

July 28 2017

1: when you have cereal, do you have more milk than cereal or more cereal than milk? More milk than cereal 2: do you like the feeling of cold air on your cheeks on a wintery day? Yes I love winter 3: what random objects do you use to bookmark your books? I just fold the page 4: how do you take your coffee/tea? I don't take it at all 5: are you self-conscious of your smile? Yes I'm super self conscious of my smile I used to not be until people started pointing it out 6: do you keep plants? No cause they die really easily 7: do you name your plants? No 8: what artistic medium do you use to express your feelings? I write in a journal 9: do you like singing/humming to yourself? I love singing so much I wish I was good at it more than anything lol 10: do you sleep on your back, side, or stomach? Back and side always 11: what's an inner joke you have with your friends? To many to list or count 12: what's your favorite planet? Neptune and Uranus ;) 13: what's something that made you smile today? I hung out with one of my sisters friends and we always have a good time 14: if you were to live with your best friend in an old flat in a big city, what would it look like? MESS 15: go google a weird space fact and tell us what it is! No 16: what's your favorite pasta dish? Chicken alfredo always and forever 17: what color do you really want to dye your hair? Purple would be so cool 18: tell us about something dumb/funny you did that has since gone down in history between you and your friends and is always brought up. Me and my two very close best friends decided to make slime and throw it at my ceiling and pieces of it are forever stuck to my ceiling. Me and my friend were peeing our pants everywhere 19: do you keep a journal? what do you write/draw/ in it? I keep notebooks around that I randomly and rarely write and draw in but I have a notebook app that I frequently write in. Just about my day or my week 20: what's your favorite eye color? brown and hazel like yesss they're so pretty 21: talk about your favorite bag, the one that's been to hell and back with you and that you love to pieces. Can't say I have one 22: are you a morning person? Noooooo 23: what's your favorite thing to do on lazy days where you have 0 obligations? Lay in my bed and go on my phone 24: is there someone out there you would trust with every single one of your secrets? Yeah kinda 25: what's the weirdest place you've ever broken into? A car at a car dealership lmao 26: what are the shoes you've had for forever and wear with every single outfit? I used to be obsessed with toms but currently my converse 27: what's your favorite bubblegum flavor? Watermelon forever bitch 28: sunrise or sunset? Sunset of course 29: what's something really cute that one of your friends does and is totally endearing? She's really really smiley and I pick at her for it but it's actually really nice 30: think of it: have you ever been truly scared? Yes 31: what is your opinion of socks? do you like wearing weird socks? do you sleep with socks? do you confine yourself to white sock hell? really, just talk about socks. Socks are make or break situation. 32: tell us a story of something that happened to you after 3AM when you were with friends. Spent 3 hours making a video star to its everyday bro by Jake Paul. All the words are engraved into my brain 33: what's your fave pastry? Cheese danish bitch 34: tell us about the stuffed animal you kept as a kid. what is it called? what does it look like? do you still keep it? Lamb pillow pet. Named lamby. Just look up lamb pillow pet but the fur on it is all fucked yo because my mom put it in the dryer. And yes I still have it 35: do you like stationary and pretty pens and so on? do you use them often? No 36: which band's sound would fit your mood right now? None my brain is literally white noise right now I'm so tired 37: do you like keeping your room messy or clean? Clean 38: tell us about your pet peeves! There's so many I'm not abot to get into that mess 39: what color do you wear the most? Dark colors for sure 40: think of a piece of jewelry you own: what's it's story? does it have any meaning to you? I have a necklace with my name on it. Got it from my grandma I wore it a lot in seventh grade aka one of the worst years ever 41: what's the last book you remember really, really loving? Elenor and park 42: do you have a favorite coffee shop? describe it! No because I hate coffee and I'm not a hashtag Tumblr aesthetic girl so I don't go running around trying to find aesthetic coffee shopsn 43: who was the last person you gazed at the stars with? I legit don't remember 44: when was the last time you remember feeling completely serene and at peace with everything? Probably at night in a car when I was like 10 45: do you trust your instincts a lot? Yes 46: tell us the worst pun you can think of. Ok found this joke from a vine don't @ me. Anal with her made my day. But it made her hole week. Bitch I die 47: what food do you think should be banned from the universe? Twinkies. Beef sticks. Tomatoes. Mushrooms. 48: what was your biggest fear as a kid? is it the same today? Car crashes. Thunderstorms/ natural disasters. And yes 100% 49: do you like buying CDs and records? what was the last one you bought? No it's dumb I pay Apple Music 14$ a month for a reason 50: what's an odd thing you collect? I used to collect snow gloves but for some reason and somehow I have a lot of turtles from a bunch of different places. Like little turtle souvenirs 51: think of a person. what song do you associate with them? My crush and it's so dumb but hey Stephen by Taylor swift damn. 52: what are your favorite memes of the year so far? All of them 53: have you ever watched the rocky horror picture show? heathers? beetlejuice? pulp fiction? what do you think of them? No.no.yes.no. Idk I haven't seen like any of them 54: who's the last person you saw with a true look of sadness on their face? Ummmmm my face in the mirror idk 55: what's the most dramatic thing you've ever done to prove a point? Ummm not sure everything I do is dramatic so 56: what are some things you find endearing in people? It's 1am and I can't remember what endearing means 57: go listen to bohemian rhapsody. how did it make you feel? did you dramatically reenact the lyrics? It reminds me of glee. And ps I didn't listen to it just in my head I imagine Jessie sprinting around stage whilst Quinn gives birth so that's an image 58: who's the wine mom and who's the vodka aunt in your group of friends? why? My friend abby is the vodka aunt and my friend julia is the wine mom 59: what's your favorite myth? Mermaids 60: do you like poetry? what are some of your faves? No 61: what's the stupidest gift you've ever given? the stupidest one you've ever received? Little einsteins singing toy when I was 9 years old from m great grandma. Lol love! 62: do you drink juice in the morning? which kind? No 63: are you fussy about your books and music? do you keep them meticulously organized or kinda leave them be? No I own like 4 books 64: what color is the sky where you are right now? Black 65: is there anyone you haven't seen in a long time who you'd love to hang out with? Yeah some friends from school I miss 66: what would your ideal flower crown look like? Ew shut up (roses) 67: how do gloomy days where the sky is dark and the world is misty make you feel? Sad and gross 68: what's winter like where you live? Brutal but I <3 it 69: what are your favorite board games? Uno and spoons and don't come at me saying they're not board games because I don't care 70: have you ever used a ouija board? No im not about to release that shit in my home 71: what's your favorite kind of tea? I don't like tea but if I had to choose sweet passion green tea from Panera fucks major shit up 72: are you a person who needs to note everything down or else you'll forget it? No 73: what are some of your worst habits? Biting my nails. Chewing the inside of my gum and picking at the skin on my thumbs 74: describe a good friend of yours without using their name or gendered pronouns. Awesomely cool dude 75: tell us about your pets! Annoying but cute sometimes I guess 76: is there anything you should be doing right now but aren't? Sleeping 77: pink or yellow lemonade? Pink always 78: are you in the minion hateclub or fanclub? Hateclub I would say j always have been but I'm gonna be honest and expose myself for wearing a minion shirt to school in fifth grade. Soo. 79: what's one of the cutest things someone has ever done for you? Ummm not sure 80: what color are your bedroom walls? did you choose that color? if so, why? Dark purple. No I did not. I wanted lilac but since I'm the younger sister I don't get to choose 81: describe one of your friend's eyes using the most abstract imagery you can think of. Ocean 82: are/were you good in school? Yeah 83: what's some of your favorite album art? Ummm the flower boy album that just came out is really cool 84: are you planning on getting tattoos? which ones? Eh they seem cool and I like them but I feel like trendy tattoos are the most regretful 85: do you read comics? what are your faves? No 86: do you like concept albums? which ones? Yeah. Not any in specific 87: what are some movies you think everyone should watch at least once in their lives? Cuberbully lmao it's kinda cringey but it's so good and hatchi because that shit has made me hyperventilate. Omg and titanic 88: are there any artistic movements you particularly enjoy? ???? Again 1:30 am brain doesn't understand 89: are you close to your parents? Yeah 90: talk about your one of you favorite cities. I love philly don't get mad at me for loving trash 91: where do you plan on traveling this year? My home and my school 92: are you a person who drowns their pasta in cheese or a person who barely sprinkles a pinch? GIVE ME ALL THE CHEESE 93: what's the hairstyle you wear the most? just done or in a ponytail 94: who was the last person you know to have a birthday? The boy I like lol 95: what are your plans for this weekend? Well I hope it's to hang out with my friends but work is a stupid bitch 96: do you install your computer updates really quickly or do you procrastinate on them a lot? Procrastinate 97: myer briggs type, zodiac sign, and hogwarts house? Idk off the top of my head. Aquarius. I think gryffindor 98: when's the last time you went hiking? did you enjoy it? For a school field trip and no becaue I was sweating and dying 99: list some songs that resonate to your soul whenever you hear them. I won't mind by zayn <3 that song because it explains my whole life that literally any body I like will not be mine ever! 100: if you were presented with two buttons, one that allows you to go 5 years into the past, the other 5 years into the future, which one would you press? why? 5 years in the future maybe?

best seen in 2019.

This is way overdue, nor is it important, but I’d like to clear out my cache on the notes app, so that I can track things more accurately in this hellstorm of a year. Usual caveats apply: I don’t watch many current things, and my tastes skew away from typical award fare, but that’s why this is MY list.

Anti

Tag - Wanted to love it, it wasn’t good.

Welcome to Marwen - Spaghetti approach means that it was too much of all things. It should have been more heavily edited and would have been better for it.

Midsommer - I know everyone went gaga for it, but it wasn’t for me. I mean, I got it. And it was well made. But it was neither pleasing nor entertaining to me.

Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker - I’m honestly not even interested in re-litigating this, and maybe this movie is why I never wrote this list, so let’s just leave it alone, eh?

Marvelous Ms. Maisel - Again, I know this is a popular pick for some of the best TV “now” but it doesn’t hit for me. I want more from her, or from him, but the story just wants to meander. Hell, I’d love a focus on just the manager. 

Titans - I wanted to love it. It’s terrible.

Legion Season 2 - This was too much. They saw how well they did with S1 and were like, fuck it, we’re going to 11. Well, that was too much.

American Gods Season 2 - Singlehandedly turned me off the show. I can take the deviations from the book (and some of them were GREAT!) but when you’re being gratuitous JUST for the sake of gratuity, there’s not much point to me tuning in. 

Black Mirror Season 5 - There might not have been a single good episode in this season? It’s a bad sign when the Miley Cyrus one MIGHT have been the best? 

Runaways Season 2 - Less Spike = less good. 

Honorable Mentions

Bird Box - Remember when this was a thing? Yeah, it was fine.

The Farewell - It wasn’t as funny as I thought it was gonna be, and that’s probably more on me than on the adverts, but I thought it was quite good. 

The Edge of Seventeen - This was quite funny, but the most hilarious parts are the ones we already saw in the preview. Still very good.

Daredevil Season 3 - It took me a looooonnng time to get to it, but it was still good. I’m not sad it’s over.

Bohemian Rhapsody - I appreciate the movie and the respect it’ll put on Queen’s name for a whole new generation. But. It wasn’t as good as it could have been, IMO.

Jessica Jones Season 3 - The last one not to make the cut to the Best Of list. Just too much ridiculousness in it, especially compared to the tightness of S1. This was the best of the Netflix MCU shows, and it’s sad that it kinda petered out this way. I’d probably watch JJ over any season of any of the other shows, though, even this S3. It’s just head and shoulders above the rest of the nonsense.  

Best of the Year

American Gods Season 1 - Like I said above, while it eventually went off the rails, I loved the boldness of most of the changes, and Anansi was dope. 

Black Mirror: Bandersnatch - A worthwhile experiment. I think it’ll grow in esteem as time passes, even though it’s not a FANTASTIC “show” - there’s just a lot more going on than its mere existence.

Rocketman - The bolder of the music movies of 2019. I’d rather have my actors actually sing the whole parts, and hell, if it was gonna be crazy, let’s go full crazy, not just have this half-hearted attempt to hedge our bets. 

The Mandalorian Season 1 - It was fun. It felt simultaneously like someone FINALLY realizing that Star Wars isn’t actually that GOOD, and it can just be a spaghetti western fun shoot-em-up time, while also indulging in the good parts of nostalgia. Baby Yoda, obviously, is cute. 

The Magicians Season 4 - Not as good as Season 3. No doubt. I’ll never try to convince anyone of that. But when it’s hitting on all cylinders, this is pretty much better than anything else on TV.

Legion Season 3 - One of the rare exceptions to the above praise. While S2 felt like a misstep, S3 was the correction to that overreach. Clearly, they knew where they were going, and they did it so well. Was it perfect? Obviously not. But I’m so happy that something this far afield exists in the MCU, even if only tangentially. 

Vice - Well, this was just a tour de force for Christian Bale, and the party didn’t stop there. Jesus. I thought I didn’t need to see it because I’d lived through it, and I wasn’t sure I’d learn anything, but damn. It was brutal. 

Zombieland 2 - The exact opposite. It was a totally fun time. Unexpected that it even exists, but it wrings out all that it can from a pretty gnarly premise in the first place, and then goes even further, both in making us laugh and actually trying to tell a story. 

Russian Doll - Obviously the best TV that I saw this year. From concept to execution, all the parts were exquisite. Even though I ended the series with some big time looming questions, I never hold that against a show. It did exactly what it wanted to do, I was never bored, and I was always entertained. What more could I ask for?

Avengers: Endgame - I mean, honestly, there’s nothing to say about this movie that hasn’t already been said to death, by people way smarter than me. The only shocking thing to me is that it’s so relatively low on my list. But there’s reasons, as you’ll see, that have nothing to do with this movie being bad, but rather the other movies being incredible. 

Mid 90s - The best “real” movie I saw last year? I mean, it was great. I know the comparisons to KIDS were abundant when it was coming out, and sure, I can see some part of that, but it was actually pretty radically different. I mean, they’re just coming from different places. It felt very...searching. Like, we could feel the kids trying to find their place. And who hasn’t been there?

Spider-Man: Far From Home - Fantastic. I mean, it’s Spidey, it’s Tom Holland, they’re in Europe, what’s not to like? Mysterio played out exactly like we knew he would, and yet I don’t know anyone who was disappointed by that. One of my friends said it was too much a Tony Stark movie, which I kinda get, but if you’re not cognizant of the universe in which this is taking place - both ours and his - I don’t get why you even see comic book movies. This was it for me. 

Captain Marvel - The only way to beat Spider-Man in my geek heart? Put a powerful woman face front to tell the fucking nerd boys who call anyone who can do anything they don’t like a Mary Sue, and have her LITERALLY save the day. The story being in the past worked perfectly for her intro to the larger MCU, and paid huge dividends in Endgame, but this is a way better movie than that one, because it CAN stand all on its own. She’s the truth.

I switched from iPhone 7 to Google's Pixel XL, and I have some feelings about it

Last year I bought an iPhone 7 Plus, but I struggled to enjoy the experience when it became obvious that iPhone is still not a top-notch device if you need it as a work tool. The lack of a full-function keyboard, primitive media sharing tools, and the multiple extra steps iOS makes you go through to navigate from app to app, all wore me down.

So, after less than a year with iPhone 7, I took the plunge and switched to Google's Pixel XL, running Android 7.1.2 (Nougat).

It's great.

Not perfect.

But it's certainly better than iPhone 7 Plus in my opinion, by a small margin.

The Pixel feels faster than the iPhone, the camera is very good, and the battery life is excellent. In addition, it comes with the most advanced version of Android, with guaranteed updates direct from Google, so there are no security issues.

And that verdict comes from someone who was pro-Apple before I picked one up. Here's why:

In January, I flew from London to attend a conference in the Swiss Alps (#FirstWorldProblems, I know). I arrived at night and got lost in waist-deep snow on the way to my chalet. It was very cold and very dark. There was no one else around. By the time I found my front door I had spent 45 minutes staggering around in sub-zero night air. I used my iPhone flashlight app as a torch and the battery held out the whole time, with juice to spare, even though it was at the end of the day. My iPhone saved me from hypothermia that night.

That made me realise why people stick with iPhone: If you want a phone you can rely on, iPhone is your friend. The battery life was the best of any phone I have ever owned. It was probably the most reliable — least buggy, non-crashy — phone I have owned so far.

The problem is that on most days I am not lost on a Swiss mountain. Most days, I need my phone to help me work: Email, calendar, camera, social media, notes and news take up 99% of my smartphone's life. And iPhone 7 Plus was not great at many of these tasks.

So, when I dropped the iPhone one day and the screen shattered into a thousand pieces, I decided it was time for change.

After several weeks with the Pixel XL here are all the positives and negatives.

POSITIVES

The Pixel feels faster. If there is any delay or lag when you're using the phone it's imperceptible.

The touch-to-wake fingerprint scanner is excellent. It doesn't just switch on your phone, it unlocks it at the same time. That reduces two clunky steps on the iPhone into one flawless, fluid movement on Pixel. Having the scanner on the back turns out to be the right location, too. That's how you hold your phone when you look at it.

No home button is cool. iPhone is about to copy the "no home button" trend that started on Android. I can tell you it looks awesome and works just fine.

The snooze alarm is actually 10 minutes. And not Apple's overly fussy 9 minutes.

A swipe keyboard that actually works. You can buy a swipe keyboard app for iPhone, but it's not as good as the free built-in one on Android.

Google's apps all work properly. One of the final incidents that tipped me out of iPhone and into Android was when I met a source who works for Spotify and saw he was using a Pixel. I asked him if he liked it and he said he loved it. Spotify uses a lot of Google apps internally, he said, so he needed a phone that worked with them flawlessly. I don't know why Google's apps are so truncated on iPhone, but they are.

The built-in gif keyboard is awesome. So much easier to send funny gifs on Android than it is in iPhone.

An actual "back" button that works. Apple's refusal to create a fully functional back-button inside iOS, and to rely instead on a jumble of different functions that differ via app, just feels dumb by comparison.

An actual "menu" button that works. Android lovers know what I'm talking about here. This is the button you push to find out what else you can do right now, wherever you are in your phone or in an app. It's like having a trusted friend giving you good advice on how to use your phone.

The Android notification screen. There is no way to explain this adequately to iPhone users: Android's biggest strength is its notification screen which lets you jump into any area of the phone from a single place. iPhone has a simplified version of this but it's just not the same.

Battery life is great. Not quite as good as iPhone 7 Plus, but in the same ballpark. I have never run out of juice in a single day, and I never carry a charger.

It is very, very reliable. Android phones were once known for having all the most exciting new functions and designs, even when they weren't ready for primetime. That often made them buggy. Restarting your Android to get it to work properly was a normal condition of life in Androidland two years ago. Not anymore. Pixel just works.

NEGATIVES

The system folder is baffling. Android has almost comically endless system options. If you are a hardcore user, this is a plus. But at the moment, tapping Android's system icon is like diving into the movie "Inception" — it's tough to tell which level of the dream you're in, and whether you need to go down a level or escape back up while you still can.

The phone did not come with earbuds. WTF Google. This is entry-level stuff.

The Uber app is worse. To be fair, this is Uber's fault not Google's. But my phone is now my car, and so I need this basic service to function properly. (And as Apple is discovering in China, users tend to be more loyal to apps than they are to the devices they sit on.)

The selfie camera has excessive "beauty face," and you can't nix it. If you think I'm looking a little bit pink these days, that's why.

The volume buttons are next to the on/off button. For right-handed people holding the phone with their left hands, this puts your fingers gripping those buttons — leading to many accidental button pushes.

Android phones come with everything in the default "on" position. There is a ritual Android users go through in the first few weeks when they own a new phone: You spend that time hunting down functions and apps that came in the default "on" position out of the box, and switching them to "off" or "silent." I understand that Google wants to show me what the phone can do. But it's a drag on battery life when every little thing inside your phone is screaming for your attention all day.

The Pixel, in short, is proof that high-end Android will continue to threaten Apple's dominance of the smartphone market.

There is something about Android done properly — as opposed to cheaply — that is very, very compelling. After all, now that Android is as reliable as iPhone then the two systems compete head-to-head on functionality and usefulness, which are both areas where Android has long been ahead.

Don't believe me? Check out Samsung's mobile revenues recently, and bear in mind that the 15% increase in unit sales came despite its flagship product literally blowing up in people's faces.

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