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teresa-moyocoyotzin · 3 years

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short recap of my thoughts on 5x09

okay so i was gonna rewatch the whole episode and do a blow-by-blow reaction post but i’m not sure i’ll have time and i kinda wanna focus on watching my fave scenes from the show before tonight. also, everyone else’s reaction posts p. much sum up my thoughts lol

nonetheless, i just wanted to give my main takeaways on the episode a week later, in case anyone cares where i’m at going into the finale! gonna go over the things i liked first, anyone who wants to just remain positive and not see any salty takes might wanna just stick to reading the first part b/c i definitely rant a bit at the end lmao. we’re still having a fun time tho 😂

THINGS I LOVED

- i mean... i think we know LOL

- obviously. i loved james and teresa’s i love you scenes, and kisses, and OOF THAT SEX SCENE. if someone had told me we were gonna get that scene back in like 2017??? i probably would have started literally floating. i totally respect that people had very specific ideas of what they wanted out of those scenes and could have different feelings about it but NOT ME BABES I AM ECSTATIC!!! i did go into the episode with a ~feeling~ that we were gonna get at least one ILY in the episode, and i just had a feeling it would be james, or at least that he would say it first. i’ve already explained in my meta about the scenes why i think it makes sense that he said it first and why i love it that he did, so i won’t go into that here. but i went in having really no expectations for it other than that it was gonna happen! i was debating about whether it would happen really casually while they’re talking, or in like a big action scene, or really dramatic or what, and what i would prefer, and i came to the conclusion that i would love it no matter what lol, but i was really into the idea of james just. fucking. saying it. while they’re just talking about something really casually. so therefore i was pretty happy with it when we got sort of a mix! they’re talking about teresa’s insane death trap of a plan so there’s that drama of “i don’t want to lose you esp. not before saying ILY” kinda thing, but it’s also just. so simple and sure! and then teresa’s i love you is like the perfect scene for me where one character is super focused on something else (in this case, trying to protect the woman he loves! agh!) and the other is just like.. i love you!!!! SO GOOD

- let’s see, what the hell else happened in this ep?

- oh okay i really liked james and teresa’s vibes this episode, they were so focused on each other and had this very ride-or-die feeling about them like they knew that each of their plans was increasingly stupid and desperate and might not even get them where they wanna go, but they were IN IT TOGETHER no matter what 😭i wish we had gotten a callback to that line but at this point, i’m p. sure they Know they’re in it together, and we do too. so it’s okay. i love that teresa still asks his input and considers his opinions even if she does her own thing anyways haha

- oh on that note, i LOVED the moment where their plans to kill Kostya aren’t working and Teresa says something like “If I can meet with him in person, I can kill him myself” and James just has this LOOK that just is the epitome of the “I am in love with a women who is DESIGNED TO STRESS ME OUT” meme lol, it made me giggle, v classic QOTS moment

- oh and of course, I LOVED that scene with devon and james at the end!!!!!!!! i was also confused about how james was showing all his emotions in that scene esp. since he tries to be stoic about his feelings for Teresa around Devon, but now that i’ve read a few people’s thoughts about, it i’m fully on board w the theory that james and teresa already knew this was coming, b/c they’re smart, and b/c james knows devon wouldn’t have let him walk away to save Teresa at the beginning of the season without motivation (like having him in place to kill her when she’s no longer useful to the CIA) and THEREFORE james was sort of “overacting” to make it believable to devon (and the audience lol) that he didn’t know this was coming, didn’t want to do it, but felt like he had to, rather than the fact that they were already plotting a fake death. that makes a lot of sense to me and makes me really love all the layers to that scene. it does give me a little bit of hope that the finale ~teresa’s not really dead~ reveal will be at least a little well executed and not just shoved in at the very end. we shall see though!

- alright i think that’s what i loved about the episode, if u don’t wanna hear me bitching about the little things then u should probably stop here!! just have to get out some of my saltiness lol

THINGS I WAS ANNOYED ABOUT

- i’m just gonna get it out of the way, yes, i too was supremely annoyed at the amount of KA and Pote take suburbia; it was all 1000% predictable down to the raccoon and the cookies, and the point could have been accomplished in exactly 1 scene, maybe 2, certainly not like 10 or however many we got. whatever. ugh.

- okay. OKAY. chicho. we need to talk about chicho. i for one, am not mad that he called pote, my boy was stressed. I AM HOWEVER, mad at the writers for making pote come back after saying he trusted chicho to take care of teresa now. like. it totally devalued THE WHOLE THING!! imo, pote shoulda stayed his ass at home where we had to watch him settle all episode, and chicho should have gotten THE HERO MOMENT HE DESERVED (esp. cuz he’s on first name basis w teresa now??) which ALSO WOULD HAVE MADE THE SCENE WHERE TERESA GIVES CHICHO THE DISTILLERY AND THE BAR SO! MUCH! MORE! MEANINGFUL!!!!! or just made it make sense at all? like .... i’m just so confused by that whole plotline like what was the point? chicho does nothing but call pote and gets T’s whole legacy in NOLA?

- and don’t even get me started on how it makes ZERO sense that pote would have had to charge in at the last minute to save teresa when JAMES THE SNIPER W AMAZING AIM WHO IS LITERALLY. IN LOVE WITH HER. is standing outside like. ur telling me james and chicho (who again, is supposed to be her #2 after james now) just stood there like “oh hey pote yeah you go ahead we’ll wait here good luck” like WHAT also.. how did pote get past all the guards that made james stay outside? are we meant to believe pote is that sneaky? y’all. it just. doesn’t make sense. this whole plot situation maddens me more than anythings tbh UGH JUST MAKE IT MAKE SENSE

- oksana’s daughter..... what’s her name again? idk b/c we only MET HER THIS WEEK....okay this amuses me but i’m also annoyed b/c like. there were so many other women who could have taken that spot in the opening sequence... Lil T, Castel, hell even Isabela??? Like idk how they could have done it but they put so much effort into her plot in the first seasons that i really thought she was gonna end up w/ Teresa in the end.. idk that would have been kind cool, Camila’s two “daughters” eventually working their way out of the life together..again idk how they could have realistically done it but i really do wish it had been someone we met before. if it had to be someone new this season, they could have introduced her earlier instead of one of the seemingly dozens of random guys we knew for 1 episode before they died... like.. give her some depth please. is she even gonna be in the finale? honestly she better be after making us listen to pote welcome her into the family... like the family u were supposed to leave so u could have an actual baby pote? the family that’s literally dispersing as we speak? also.. since when did pote love oksana so much anyways? also...... just.. if teresa’s gonna have some sort of daughter figure or whatever she’s supposed to be, wouldn’t it make sense to have her be the one to give the big welcome to the family speech? idk y’all..... i’m amused but also baffled at the sheer lack of planning behind this. did no one realize they needed someone for the opening scene until like. halfway thru the season? did they plan to have it be castel but they couldn’t get her for filming (hence all the weird castel plots?) INQUIRING MINDS WOULD LIKE TO KNOW. it’s whatever tho lol

- i just hope that what’s-her-name gets a lil bit of plot in the finale esp. since otherwise it might just be pote running around being pissy (i don’t actually think that haha but i am a lil nervous that teresa won’t come back until the last few mins and i’ll have to spend all episode looking at boaz and devon and pote and KA.. i haven’t looked at any spoilers tho so i’m still hopeful! i will probably make a post about my hopes going into the finale a lil later, both realistic and unrealistic :)

#ik it's all been said before but i just had to get my feelings out before i could move on to the finale #the finale!!! wow.. crazy shit y'all #qots #queen of the south #jeresa #qots 5x09

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astringofmadhousefloozies · 3 years

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Magicam Live

Vil’s guest is a pest. Contains coarse language, people being catty bitches, and more telling than showing.

You want more, check my Twisted Wonderland Fanfiction tag. If you liked it, let me know!

~*~*~*~

Transcript of Last Week's Magicam Live From *schoenheit_official

Vil: Hello my dearest fans! As promised, I will be showing off my newest capsule makeup collection, to be released this Monday exclusively at Feathersweep Cosmetics. However, due to high demand, instead of simply demonstrating on myself, I thought I would show that anyone could be half as beautiful as me with these!

[He holds a hand out to the side.]

V: Please welcome my fellow student at Night's Raven College, Yuu.

Yuu: Yo.

[A girl with short, dark hair and tired eyes sits down beside him. Spotty and plump, with a notable double chin. She's notably underdressed, compared to Vil.]

Y: I am she. I'm *donegotisekaid, if you haven't seen yet. Full of genuine memes from another universe, as well as me figuring this place out, and pictures of my not-cat.

V: She's simply been begging me for a makeover!

Y: He asked me if I'd do it, actually.

[Vil stops and takes a deep breath, clearly irritated.]

V: Yes, well. You've prepared?

Y: I scrubbed my face real good and managed to leave most of my pimples alone, if that's what you mean.

[Vil sighs]

V: As much as you're capable of, clearly. We'll start with the primer.

Y: [with a smile] Didn't you already give me one on how to act in this?

[Vil pinched the bridge of his nose, regret pouring from every cell in his body.]

V: Just lie back and be quiet until I'm done with you.

[Yuu looks at the camera, but says nothing. There's an audible snicker from behind the camera.]

[There are a few quiet minutes where Vil prepares her face, before selecting a foundation.]

V: So, is there a reason you don't wear makeup? You could look quite nice with it.

Y: Few reasons. It's a lot of effort, and I tire easily. I don't really like the feel of it on my face, and I tend to touch my face a lot anyways, so it doesn't last. It's a lot of money, and I break out very easily.

V: I can see that. Don't you use face wash?

Y: You should have seen me when I did use it! Much worse.

V: Ugh. I'll give you something later. And none of these have a good tone for you.

Y: Just pick the closest! I'll end up wrecking it by a few hours from now anyways.

[Vil rolled his eyes.]

V: Rook, any questions from the chat?

[A familiar accented voice from offscreen]

Rook: *stellargems wants to know how Yuu found herself at NRC.

Y: Transdimensional bullshit. I'm here until we figure out how I can get home. It's not bad, I don't miss it much.

V: Yuu even has her own dorm so she doesn't have to bother anyone.

Y: Not that it stops me.

V: [sotto voce] Don't we all know.

Y: If they kept you in a building with four usable rooms total and no electricity, you'd be out and about too. At least the ghosts there are really nice and help me out.

V: Do you kiss these ones too, or was that a one time thing?

Y: If I hadn't kissed her we'd be down a student and you and half the people I hang out with would be paralyzed, so don't make fun.

[Vil stops to regard the camera.]

V: To clarify, there was an incident with a ghost princess causing a lot of trouble at the school a few months ago. Yuu decided to kiss her to fix everything, because she's both stupid and deeply strange.

Y: It was really fun until I started dying.

V: All her blood was on the outside. It was disgusting.

Y: It did work though!

V: Keep telling yourself that, you didn't kiss the one you really wanted to.

[Yuu gives him the finger, and Vil shoves her hand down.]

R: *vilpleasefathermychildren asks-

[Yuu sputters with laughter. Vil just winks at the camera with a smile that doesn't reach his eyes.]

R: They want to know if there'll be a coupon code for the new release.

V: There will! It'll be released via the official fanclub email Sunday night.

Y: It'll be a whole three percent off and you have to pay to access it.

V: Stop that.

Y: [sweetly] No.

Rook: *getterbackback wants to know what your shirt says?

Y: Yeah, hold on.

[She stands and pulls the shirt out to be seen better. It says in large letters, I'M CUTE AND I BITE]

Y: You can do one yourself if you take a dark shirt, tape the parts you want covered, and scorch the area around it with diluted bleach. I've done a few of these, a few designs more than once.

V: Destroyed them?

Y: Nah, Lil wants at least one of every one I do.

V: [to the camera] That would be our fellow student Lilia Vanrouge, from Diasomnia.

Y: He's pretty great. He's *elderbatbrat if you want to look him up.

V: Sit back down so I can figure out which blush to use.

Y: Pinks and corals work best for my skin tone.

V: I thought you didn't wear makeup?

Y: Why do you think I know wearing it tires me out? It's not something I ever did a lot because of the effort.

Y: Except for highlighter. it's basically sparkles and it's light, so I like that.

V: You remember that, but not your proper name?

Y: Ain't life grand.

R: I'm getting several questions about that. Would you care to elabourate for the chat?

Y: Yeah. I don't remember a lot about where I'm from. Culturally? Lots. What I like? What I don't like? Everything. Names and places specific to who I was? No. And don't ask me to think about it too hard, I get the worst fucking headache and I stop seeing right.

V: You've never seen right in your life.

Y: Oh, fuck off, Vil.

[Vil stops blushing one cheek to point.]

V: Stop that.

[Yuu responds by biting at his finger with an audible click when her teeth meet, laughing hysterically as Vil pulls back in shock.]

V: !!! Dreadful little monster!

Y: Yeah, but you're the one who thought you'd get more views if I was here.

R: We indeed just surged another 20,000 views and counting! Excellent work, Yuu.

Y: Thank you, Rook.

[Vil looks ready to explode.]

Y: I won't bite again, that was just too easy. Please continue, I do want to see what magic you can do.

V: This is regular makeup.

Y: Metaphorically, you jackass.

R: *rosemassacre wants to know if you're always like this.

V: She's always this horrible.

Y: Vil first saw me and called me a dumpy little potato. I told him it's because I'm great all ways and everyone wants a taste, and slapped my ass at him. He's been obsessed with me ever since.

V: I am not obsessed with you.

R: You go into a rage over her at least once a week.

V: She can't go a week without being a pest.

Y: I went three after you kicked me out of the movie club.

V: You can't just project violence on the walls of Pomfiore because I said we weren't going to watch it!

Y: Vil, it was The Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2, and it is art.

V: A man gets sawed in half in the first ten minutes.

Y: To an absolutely bangin' soundtrack. Oh that reminds me. Ad time, hold on.

[She wiggles a little before puting on her best customer service face.]

Y: If you want to access media that is quite literally from another world, please go to MonstroMedia dot com and sign up! There's ebooks, movies, tv, music, and more. Much of it is horror, sci-fi and fantasy, as it's from my person collection of media brought with me on my laptop and backup drives. You can use the code SHOENHEITSAYSWHAT for the first month free!

[She put her hand up and lowered her voice to a conspiratorial tone.]

Y: I completely understand piracy, but I'd appreciate if you paid because this is the only way I get spending money, and I can only bat my eyes at these boys so much before they expect something in return for gifts.

V: How'd Ashengrotto talk you into that one?

Y: He was going to make me start paying for all the food I eat if I didn't.

R: *waterwitchesbetgitches says, and I quote, "so like if ur the only gal at NRC how many boyfs you have"

Y: So many. At least twenty. Even more if there were girls here.

V: That is a gross exaggeration. She has maybe three, if we're being very generous on the definition.

Y: [points] And he's mad he's not one of them.

V: [squinting] You are absolutely dreadful and I can't understand how you're so popular.

Y: I like you too, Vil.

[Vil pauses, visibly taken aback.]

V: ... Thank you.

V: You know you're going to have paparazzi on your tail now, right?

Y: Aw, shit.

R: *insertmagicamhandlehere wants to know what's on your neck.

V: An antique chain with an attached charm specially made for me by Soleil Atelier.

R: I believe that was for Yuu.

[Yuu snickers, as Vil looks for himself. When her collar is pulled down, it fully reveals a vicious set of hickeys with visible toothmarks.]

V: Eww.

Y: You should see the other guy.

V: Eww!

[Vil takes a moment to recover, while Yuu laughs.]

Y: That could be a second part! Everyone needs that tutorial. "Bruise Coverup How-to by Vil Shoenheit: For when you just can't keep them off of you."

[Vil mutters something under his breath that sounds suspiciously like "nerds shouldn't be allowed to fuck"]

Y: Then where would your fans be?

V: At least there's only setting spray after this and then you can leave.

Y: Won't you get bored without me here?

R: One last question! *shroudstreaming has asked... well, there's a lengthy keysmash and an all-caps "why".

Y: Ah. Hi, babe!

Y: Hey, everyone go follow him, he's a total fucking babe and he refuses to take my word for it, no matter what I do to him-

[Vil sprays setting spray directly in her face, leading to Yuu coughing.]

V: No taste at all, and gross to boot.

Y: Asshole.

[Vil offers a mirror]

V: No. Miracle worker.

[Yuu looks... well, the same, but with an even, well made-up face.]

Y: ... Aww. You remembered I like sparkles.

V: Less likely to scrub it off if you actually like it.

[Yuu's admiring herself for a few moments in silence, with Vil watching, quite pleased.]

Y: Hey, can I do you next?

V: Absolutely not.

Y: Ask the chat.

V: No.

R: Chat says yes.

V: [With a visible eye roll] Ugh, fine.

Y: Aight. Take your shirt off.

V: What.

[Yuu brings up a case and flips it open. Inside is a magazine with a gory cover, and various things like fake blood and liquid latex.]

Y: Alright kiddies. You wanna learn how to slit a man's throat?

[Vil gets up and walks away without another word.]

Y: You said I could! Get back here!

[Yuu follows. Rook emerges from behind the camera.]

R: That's it for tonight, ma belles. Next time.

[Magicam Live ends, but not before audible yelling and scuffling, quickly cut off.]

#twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland fanfiction #vil schoenheit

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realcube · 3 years

Text

What BNHA Heroes have their s/o saved as in their phone

Class 1A x Reader

+ Aizawa and Shinsou

tw// cussing, cringe smh, lots of love <3

Class 1A

Yuga Aoyama

he has you saved as ‘my ✨star✨’

and honestly you love it because he calls you that in real life too

Mina Ashido

she has you saved as ‘bubs 💞💓💖💝💘💕’

the only reason there isn’t more hearts was because of the limit smh

she changes it every few weeks to a new pet name though

also she calls you that irl sometimes

Tsuyu Asui

she has you saved as ‘my flower 🌺’

honestly, the only reason she put you as that rather than your name because of your intense love for flora

every date you take Tsuyu on is always to somewhere with beautiful scenery and an abundance of flowers

Tenya Iida

he has you saved as ‘beef stew’

he originally had you saved as ‘(Y/N) (L/N)’

but you showed him that you had him saved as ‘Honey’ so he wanted to save you under a pet name too

however, he couldn’t really think of one so he asked for you assistance and you told him that most cute pet names come from food

“So, what food do I remind you of, Iida?”

“Beef stew.”

Needless to say you both were laughing your asses off for a while after that

but it’s still cute because beef stew is his favourite food just like you are his favourite person

Ochako Uraraka

she has you saved as ‘(L/N) <3 ’

she wanted to use a heart emoticon but her flip-phone doesn’t let her smh

Also she doesn’t have a pet name for you yet but she is working on it

like she tried calling you ‘baby girl’ but then you explained to her the sexual undertones to that name so she stopped and she’s been too embarrassed since then to try again

Mashirao Ojiro

he has you saved as ‘tail boy’s s/o 🤪’

y’all had a whole-ass discussion about this one time lmao

y’all were brainstorming ideas for what you should save each other as in your phones

you didn’t want to have something basic like ‘babe’ or ‘my heart🥰’ but rather something funny and you suggested (jokingly) to save his contact as ‘tail boy’

and rather than being offended like you thought he’d be, you both ended up laughing your asses of together for a solid 5 minutes (at least)

so you saved his contact as that and since he couldn’t come up with a funny nickname in relation to your quirk, he just saved you as ‘tail boy’s s/o🤪’

Denki Kaminari

he has you saved as ‘ASH CECHUM 😩😳💦🌚💓🧀'

plz don’t ask about the emojis idek

anyway, he saw that you saved him as ‘Pikachu <3′ which makes sense considering his quirk..

so he took it upon himself to save your contact as - in his own words - “That guy who owns the Pikachu from Pokémon’

however, despite the fact he has watched Pokémon before, he had no idea how to spell Ash’s second name and apparently the thought never came him that; ‘hey, maybe I should google it.’

so he just sounded it out

as for the all caps, contrary to popular belief , he does know how to turn it off

he just chooses not to for the aesthetic and also it takes a lot of effort

that is why he doesn’t use proper punctuation either

Eijiro Kirishima

he has you saved as ‘love bug’

honestly, you’re not too sure of when or why he changed your contact name after y’all started dating but..

you thought it was cute but..a bit cringe

obviously you didn’t say anything about it though, you weren’t trying to be mean to your boyfriend for no reason

it’s not like he called you that irl

however, he’d be out of his mind if he thought you were gonna save him as something like that

the best he’ll get from you is ‘Kiri babe 🤘' (get it? bc...rock!)

Kouji Koda

he has you saved as ‘love bug’

ASKJFCWB YOU THINK IT IS OUT-OF-THIS-WORLD ADORABLE OML

like it makes sense because he like talks to insects and stuff and you’re his lil love bug cause you are his lover and stuff hhhhh

also because of the size difference between you and him, i mean, you are basically the size of an insect compared to him

in short, Koda supremacy 🙇‍♀️🙇‍♂️

Rikidou Satou

he has you saved as ‘sugar pie’

honestly, poor man

he was completely clueless when you asked him to save you as something cute

like, he know what you meant...but he had no idea what to go for

so you chose for him 👍

and you made a pretty good decision tbh I mean, it’s cute! it relates to his quirk and all

and he has started to call you that irl sometimes and it always makes your heart go brrrrrrr

Mezou Shouji

he has you saved as ‘hunk’

ok, i know i said Satou was a poor man but let me just say

THIS POOR MAN

you told him it’d be cute if you both saved each other as cute pet names in your phones and dead ass him response ‘you’re not my pet though..’

AAAAAAAAAAA

so after a lot of explaining, as an example you whipped out your own phone and showed him how you had saved him as ‘hunk’

...he really went and just copied you

you thought that was so funny and precious though so you didn’t ask him to change it

Kyouka Jirou

she has you saved as ‘my melody 🎶’

ok, so it started when she noticed that you use the same pen everyday - a My Melody one

she thought that was so fucking adorable and she kinda started teasing you for it; not that you minded though

she also thought it was so cute when you’d get all flustered

so one day she just decided to change your contact name to that

it also kinda tied in with her love for music (but mostly her love for you uwu)

Hanta Sero

he has you saved as ‘my honey nutter butter biscuit’

after Kirishima called his s/o ‘love bug’ infront of y’all that one time, you both spent the next hour taking the piss and laughing at how over-the-top couple nicknames are sometimes

so just #for the meme he saved your contact as a hyperbole of what those cringe couple pet names are like

oh and you have him saved as ‘My beloved sweet peach taco’

Fumikage Tokoyami

he has you saved as ‘Helena’

yeah, he wanted to be edgy and save your contact after a MCR song

(no, he does not know that Helena is about Gerard’s grandmother but don’t you dare tell him)

Shoto Todoroki

he has you saved as ‘(Y/N) (L/N) 💖’

you texted him something during lunch one time to see his reaction while you were sitting next to him but then you noticed that your name in his phone was simply ‘(Y/N) (L/N)’

you mentioned it briefly but you didn’t make a fuss out of it because it really wasn’t a big deal

however, he asked to see what his name in your phone was and you showed him

you had saved him as ‘Babey ( •̀ ω •́ )✧’

he went home and did some research on some good pet names to save you as in his phone

after that, his search history kinda looked like;

‘pet names’

‘pet names for humans’

‘pet names for lovers’

‘cute nicknames for my girlfriend’

‘cute emoticons’

he deadass came in the next day and the first thing he did was pull out his phone and show you the emoji he put next to your name

“Look, (L/N). I found this emoticon and put it next to your contact name in my phone.”

yes, he sound like boomer..obvs

he spends 90% of his free time training rather than on his phone

and the time that he is on his phone, he isn’t using emojis, he is searching shit like

‘how to hack into a credit card without the PIN’

Tooru Hagakure

she saves you as ‘❤😘’

no, she doesn’t need to save you as your name to remember who you are

she’s not a peasant

Katsuki Bakugo

he has you saved as ‘pretty stupid face’

originally it was just ‘stupid face’

but you noticed it and just dropped a subtle comment like “hey, that’s mean.”

so he came in the next day with ‘pretty’ added to the start

“i am genuinely too nice to you sometimes.” he’d say

“THE STUPID FACE PART IS STILL THERE”

“I KNOW BUT I ADDED PRETTY TO THE START!!”

“Wow, tch, such I gentleman-”

“I know-HEY WAIT WAS THAT SARCASM?!”

Izuku Midoriya

he has you saved as ‘sweetest love muffin’

you that one couple i mentioned in Sero’s headcanons?

yeah, that’s y’all

you are both literally that couple

“No, you hang up.”

“No, you hang up!”

“Nooo, cause I’ll miss you”

“I’ll miss you moreeee”

he literally threw a bunch of his favourite adjectives into a pet name lol

also your contact name for him is something on a similar wavelength

Minoru Mineta

I know most y’all would’ve even give him your number lol

but for those who would 🤮

he has you saved as ‘sweet cheeks’ or sumn

Momo Yaoyorozu

she has you saved as ‘My McMuffin’

HOL UP LET ME EXPLAIN

ok so she let you take her to McDonald’s cause you wanted to see her reaction since she is used to gourmet cuisine or whatever

so it was sure to be entertaining

and it was

but not in a good way

she was almost sick after she had a bite of a big mac and then she tried to wash it down with the Sprite but then she fainted for like a solid 10 seconds

once she came back, she obviously wanted to leave..so you did

A year later, y’all are in the town and both of you are starving

But Momo realised that she didn’t have her card on her or any money but that was fine because at least you had your debit card on you

You had enough money on it for a taxi back to Momos place and a McMuffin each

Obviously she didn’t want one but when you started eating in front of her, of course she wanted a taste

and so it was love at first bite

she loved it so much so of course you bought another one for her and she consumed it in a millisecond (not literally)

so now she has your contact saved as the one thing competing against you for her love - a McMuffin

Shota Aizawa

unfortunately he does not have your contact saved as ‘kitten’

instead, in his phone you are saved as ‘The One 💙’

simple, yet it effectively shows his admiration - just the way he likes it

and he only added the emoji to make your name stand out more so he could easily tell whether he was gonna ignore the following message or not

because if Mike is texting him telling his that he needs the extremely important documents that Aizawa keeps in his coded filing cabinet, Shota will be like -.-

but if you text him asking for him to pick up chocolate on his way home, he’ll be like 🏃‍♂️

Hitoshi Shinso

he has you saved as ‘big daddy’

plz don’t ask

it’s an inside joke between you and him

okay well, if you must know

y’all were trying to come up with the most absurd nicknames for each other that kinda sound legit

some other gems

‘Muscleman’

‘Big scary snookums’

‘sexy giant’

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faefictions · 4 years

Text

Stay

Harry Holland x Reader

Word Count: 2,839

Summary: Your best friend, Harry Holland, ghosts you while he’s away for work. The harder you try to get him back, the further he pulls away

Warnings: a lil angst

It had been three months. Harry, your best friend of 6 years, left for America and essentially forgot about you. You didn’t blame him, at first at least. He was following his dreams, and sure he was going to get busy. Working on set with his brother Tom left little downtime, but in the past he had always found time to send you stupid snapchats or tag you in memes he thought would annoy you (although they never did).

This time was different though. He ignored you for about a month. At first, he never opened your messages, and never sent any himself. After a couple weeks, he started to open all of them, but he never replied. Some of those messages were nothing but rude to leave without a response, and it hurt to see him instantly read them, but never reply.

After he did that for the 8th time in a row, you decided to call him. And when he didn’t pick up, you kept calling. You called until you eventually got sent straight to voicemail, and that was when the first message since he had left came through.

“Sorry Love, busy right now. Is it important?”

If it weren’t important, you wouldn’t have been blowing up his phone, and he knew that. You had no idea, but he knew exactly what was going on. There was no way in Hell he was going to help it along, though.

“Call me when you’re free,” was all you could reply with. You paced your apartment for an hour, thanking the forces of the universe that your roommate was out for the night and not experiencing your anxiety.

You almost forgot about the time difference between New York and London. When he called at 1 am, you were about ready to explode, until it clicked that he was 5 hours behind you. So you took a deep breath and tried to at least forgive that one understandable misstep before you started the dreaded conversation.

“Hey,” you awkwardly greeted, and he instantly read the discomfort in your voice. It was the conversation he had been dreading.

“Hey, what’s up?”

“Are you serious, Harry?”

You didn’t sound angry at all, and that may have been what hurt most. You just sounded…desperate.

“What do you mean?”

“Harry, why the fuck are you ignoring me?”

“I’m not. I told you, I was busy.”

“Busy all the times you’ve left me on read in the last month too? Look, I get that you and Tom are busy. I know that you’re working hard out there, but this is the first I’ve heard from you since you’ve left. So if I did something, please just tell me.”

“Y/n, I can’t just reply to everything you send me. I have more responsibility than last time, I’m doing a lot of shit. You can’t get mad over that.”

“Harry, I think we both know that’s bullshit. Paddy told me you were texting him last Saturday, complaining about how bored you were. I texted you twice that night, and was instantly left on read both times.”

“Ok, well Paddy’s my brother. Maybe I just wanted to talk to him. I missed him.”

“So you don’t want to talk to me then. Got it.”

“Y/n, no that’s not what-“

“No, I get it Harry. I’m not family. I don’t matter as much. You don’t have to say it.”

“God, you’re being fucking ridiculous.”

“Never mind, Harry. Forget I even called.”

“Really? You’re going to act like that?”

“I’m being serious, Harry. Forget I called, forget I texted, just forget I exist. You seem to be good at that.”

“Y/n, you’re being fucking ridiculous. I didn’t do anything wrong.”

“Ok, whatever, just… have fun in America, Harry.”

And with that, you hung up.

You weren’t sure if Harry would have kept leaving you on read after that, because you didn’t have the heart to send anything anymore. But he wasn’t reaching out either, so you took it as a safe bet that he didn’t care much anymore. And you didn’t blame him. Sure, you didn’t understand it before, but you had blown up on him. He hated confrontation, so no matter how much you hated him for the initial transgression, you had to remind yourself that this was partially your fault, and he now had reason to be just as upset with you.

You started losing sleep, and that never really stopped. Losing Harry felt like losing a big part of yourself. You tried avoiding his family after that, Harrison included. They were tangled into your life, and it felt like you were ripping a prickly barb from a poorly knitted sweater. You just couldn’t get them out of your life without it all starting to unravel.

After the first month, the second of which Harry had been gone, they all took the hint. Paddy and Nikki stopped inviting you over on the weekends, or to their lonely family dinners. Harrison stopped checking in on you. He had claimed that it was Harry’s idea at first, but you saw right through that lie.

The third month, your mental health dropped drastically. You were only getting a couple hours of sleep a night, you were working yourself to the bone. And while the money was nice, your boss was threatening to make you take time off. Even she could tell that that something was seriously wrong.

When you started to make mistakes in your work, expensive mistakes, she forced you to go midday. She told you to take the rest of the week off, pleading with you to get some rest. You were just glad that you hadn’t been fired.

That day, you went home and spent the rest of daylight in bed, nothing but silence filled the room. When your roommate, Kayla, came home and found you quietly staring at the ceiling, she offered to take you out to dinner, but you didn’t have the energy.

“Y/n when are you going to get over this? You’ve been depressed for over a month now. This isn’t healthy, and I swear you’re not even trying. I don’t want to be that bitch, but you need to get off your ass and get over it. So get up, we’re going out.”

You gave her a dirty look, but you knew she was right. You didn’t want to get over Harry, because you didn’t want it to really be over. But it had been long enough, and neither of you had heard from the other, so you let out a loud groan and got out of bed to put on some real pants so you could go out.

You didn’t look half as decent as you usually did on nights out. You barely put effort into your outfit, you weren’t even entirely sure it matched. You didn’t put on any makeup, so your under-eye bags were dark enough to almost seem like you had been in a fight.

Kayla would have encouraged you to at least try to look like your normal self, but just getting you out of bed was enough of an achievement for the night.

She ended up taking you to your favorite restaurant, but it did nothing for your mood. Harry had taken you there dozens of times. He always insisted on taking you to dinner for your birthday, and his brothers would always find a way to infiltrate your night, but you never minded. You loved their company.

Being there just reminded you of him. When your food arrived, you excused yourself to the bathroom, needing a moment alone to clear your head. Staring at yourself in the mirror helped you take a few breaths, but you couldn’t get Harry off of your mind. Half of you wished that he was there with you, but the other half was still mad at him. Mad at him for ignoring you for a month. Mad at him for pretending like that wasn’t what he had been doing. But most of all, you were mad at him for leaving things how they were. Of course you could have called or texted, it was a two way street, but you were afraid that he would just ignore you again, and you didn’t know if you would be able to handle that kind of rejection.

You tried to take one last deep breath before going back out, but when you opened the door to make your way back to the table, the breath was knocked out of you. Harrison was sitting at the table with Kayla, and she didn’t look one bit surprised to see him.

You weren’t in the mood for an intervention, so you made a beeline for the front doors, trying to keep your head down as you passed their table so they wouldn’t see you leave. In hindsight, you should have known that getting out of there undetected wasn’t plausible, but Harrison’s voice calling your name didn’t so much as make you pause.

The night air was colder than you had remembered it being just 20 minutes prior. It could have been the cold, the lack of food in your system, or the anxiety bubbling in your stomach just from seeing one of Harry’s closest friends, or a combination of all three that was making your body tremble.

You could only imagine how pathetic you looked. You already looked like you were sick from the lack of effort you put in to your appearance, and the tears rushing to yours eyes didn’t help either. You were about to ready to rush into an alleyway to hope for the best while you rode out the wave of tears, but as you took a sharp turn around a corner, you crashed into someone, almost sending you both to the ground if it weren’t for his steadying hand on your upper arm.

You knew instantly, the sweatshirt and cologne were a dead give away, but you were in denial. Sure enough, you looked up to meet those brown eyes that you loved oh so much, yet somehow despised even more. You thought you had looked bad, but he looked almost worse, which surprised you. The bags under his eyes were darker than you had ever seen them, and his hair was disheveled. You were almost embarrassed to admit that you recognized the sweats he was wearing as the only thing he would wear when he was throwing a fit, but this was much more than a measly tantrum. This was a heartbreak.

“Hey,” he stumbled breathlessly. You were a little relieved to see how surprised he was to run into you. You would have originally guessed this was all a big set up that he was a part of, but he seemed to be just as clueless as you. Still, you couldn’t muster up the courage to greet him like he wanted, so with a half hearted smirk, you tried to rush past him. He was having none of that though.

After you hung up the phone that night, he had known he fucked up, but he was too stubborn for his own good. You had told him that as a joke a million times, but now he knew what you meant.

He blocked your path just before you could pass, and if it weren’t for his pleading eyes, you would have just pushed right through him.

“Please, don’t walk away.”

“What do you want?”

“Are you serious?”

“Dead.”

“I-I just want to talk.”

“Really, Harry? You’ve had, what, four months to want to talk? Must not be that important.”

“Y/n, don’t do this again.”

“Do what, Harry? You fucking abandoned me, without so much as an explanation as to why, but I’m supposed to be happy to see you? Is that what you want? You want me to just forget how shitty you made me feel for four months and just jump into your arms?”

“No, I-“

“Then what the fuck do you want, Harry?”

“Y/n, you’re making a scene.”

“I will make a scene if I goddamn please, Harold.”

He let out a sigh, a moment of silence passed over the both of you. You almost took it as a chance to walk away, but something inside you was screaming to stay.

“When’s the last time you slept? You look like shit,” he asked, his eyes finally coming up to meet yours. You would have slapped him on the shoulder if his concern wasn’t written so explicitly on his face.

“How endearing.”

“You know how I meant it,” he gave you a sad half smile.

“Look, I can’t do this right now. Today has been shitty enough, I just can’t handle-“

“What happened today?”

“I’m not really in the mood to divulge that information to you. I just wanna go home.”

“I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine.”

“No, I don’t mean for asking that. I’m…I’m sorry for leaving you on read. For ignoring all your calls. For not hitting you up in my spare time. And I’m sorry for not reaching out after that last phone call.”

“Ok, thanks, but sorry isn’t going to change anything.”

“Well what do you need from me then?”

Need. That word almost made you stumble back. He didn’t sound annoyed by the fact that you weren’t immediately forgiving him after his apology, as he usually would. He wasn’t asking what you wanted from him, he was asking what you needed, and that seemed to make a world of difference in your heart.

“An explanation,” you murmured after a second of silence, but he heard you loud and clear.

“I don’t know if I can give that to you.”

“Ok, then let me know when you can. In the meantime, I’ll be walking home.”

“Y/n, please.”

“No, all I’m asking is why. If you can’t give me that, then this isn’t worth it in the first place. I’ll see you around, Harry.”

He didn’t block you as you walked away, but it may have just been because he saw the tears in your eyes. He knew you hated crying in front of other people.

You must have made it half a block away before he turned around and called something after you, but you couldn’t hear him over your sniffles.

“What?” you asked as you turned back around to see him jogging towards you.

“I missed you.”

“Ok… I missed you too?”

“No, I mean, it’s the shittiest excuse, but… I missed you too much. Talking to you, knowing you were a world away living your life without me, it just, it hurt too much. And I sound like a fucking idiot saying it out loud, and I think that’s partially why I didn’t want to tell you, but that’s why. So, please, don’t go.”

“You missed me too much?” you asked, implicitly calling out his bullshit.

“Yes, I promise that was the reason.”

“Usually when you miss someone, you just, I don’t know, fucking call them.”

“I know, and I should have. I should have replied to every single one of your messages, and I should have sent you one every single time I thought about you. I should have told you how things were going every night, just like I wanted to. I should have caved and just told you how much I fucking loved you, but I didn’t.”

“You what?”

Both of you could barely breathe as he looked nervously into your eyes, trying to gauge your reaction. He sensed nothing but surprise though.

“Loved you. Love, I guess, since I still do. Always have.”

“Well that’s terrible timing, because I fucking hate you,” you said finally cracking a smile.

“Ok, I deserve that,” he admitted, smiling right back.

“You really mean it? You’re not just trying to find a way out of the situation?”

“I mean it.”

“Promise?” you asked, more seriously this time, as you stuck out your pinky. Without hesitation, he linked his own with yours.

“Ok… I think you owe me a drink before I can reciprocate.”

“That sounds about fair.”

“Maybe dinner too.”

“You got it.”

He pulled you in for a big hug, and the faded smell of his cologne on that sweatshirt was enough to calm every nerve in your body. You had missed him more than you had cared to admit.

“Let’s get you home, I was serious about you looking like shit,” he said, and you decided to hit him on the shoulder this time. He laughed at you, knowing full well that he deserved it, and that smile melted your heart.

You walked the whole way back to your apartment with his arm around your shoulder. Sure, deep down, you still resented him just a little for putting you through the past four months, but it was nothing that a little teasing and guilting him into buying food for you for a month wouldn’t fix. Nothing, not even this, could come between the two of you, and you hoped that nothing would ever try again.

#harry holland #harry holland blurb #harry holland imagine #harry holland oneshot #harry holland x reader #harry holland angst #harry holland fluff #harrison osterfield

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scendant · 4 years

Text

THE POSITIVE & NEGATIVE; Mun & Muse - Meme.

fill out & repost ♥ This meme definitely favors canons more, but I hope OC’s still can make it somehow work with their own lore, and lil’ fandom of friends & mutuals. Multi-Muses pick the muse you are the most invested in atm.

tagged by: @zhrets aka THE stinky boy, Thank 4 teh Tag-desu uwu *glomps* tagging: @foxcharmed / @heroeth / @garuvusu (do it twice i dare you gabby) / @icarise

My muse is: canon / oc / au / canon-divergent / fandomless / complicated

Is your character popular in the fandom? YES / NO / KINDA

Is your character considered hot™ in the fandom? YES / NO

Is your character considered strong in the fandom? YES / NO

Are they underrated? YES / NO

Were they relevant for the main story? YES / NO.

Were they relevant for the main character? YES / NO

Are they widely known in their world? YES / NO.

How’s their reputation? GOOD / BAD / NEUTRAL.

How strictly do you follow canon? / I follow canon as much as I can, but it’s important for me to note that Elesis has many versions of herself depending on exactly which time I write her. For the most part, for panfandom interactions, I go for a more general approach incorporating canon into her story (as she did travel solo across dimensions for a hyper-extended period of time), but making it so that it wouldn’t have a tremendous effect on the actual canon of the story (by making her forget every world where she’d traveled, which gives opportunity for plots to revolve around that). I try to follow canon but, the game was a 2008 KMMORPG that was a patchwork mess and character identity is left highly to fandom and individual interpretation. My Elesis is nearly an original character at this point. I’ve thought about what made sense for her for a long time. She is a childhood character that had a significant impact on why I decided to rp, the kind of person I am today, and liking her and maining her in the original game inspire a lot of my love for similar characters.

SELL YOUR MUSE! Aka try to list everything, which makes your muse interesting in your opinion to make them spicy for your mutuals. / Elesis Sieghart provides a lot of introspection. She is interesting because she is multifaceted. She is a leader---a Savior, going by the way canon sees her. But she’s not. Several times in canon, namely in her background and in an implied alternate dimension, she leans towards revenge over justice. Her goal has been, and always has been, to enact revenge on the villainess who took her father away from her. Her reaction to seeing her father die in front of her is anger, and then a desire for vengeance. In the alternate universe mentioned, she is so overtaken with rage that she transforms into a shell of herself consisting of her determination and her desire to kill----something that isn’t common among characters like her. Likewise, all throughout canon, she forced her way into a leadership position that, gradually, she begins to doubt and resent. She was brash, had an ugly personality, trampled over others’ opinions and yet---she cares about them so much. She’s a leader because she treats everyone she meets as equals, but she isn’t a leader-type because she’d rather seek anger in her friends’ name rather than protecting them in the present. Elesis always, always, looks towards the past for her actions rather than the present and she is fundamentally flawed as a protagonist. Not to mention, she is selfish and she takes her enjoyment of battle to extremes. Rather than being a forgiving and kind protagonist, she is ruthless and nearly totalitarian in her desire to fight over doing the right thing. She would rather die than retreat for the safety of her friends. She is angry, but it’s kept inside. She is lustful for violence, but she has to keep up the image of a good leader. She’s constantly on a breaking point one way or another, and I love that about her and I hope my interactions can spark some of that curiosity to go beyond what she is on the outside.

She’s a character that has a lot of potential for relationships. She has so many experiences that have changed her over and over again that she cherishes and is referred back to often. She’s a lot of contradictions in one woman, and to weasel your way into that takes a lot of effort and it’s rewarding. That’s how I want to portray her.

Now the OPPOSITE, list everything why your muse could not be so interesting (even if you may not agree, what does the fandom perhaps think?). Elesis isn’t digestible. She’s kind of basic looking and her words are far and few in between. I think she’s a very difficult character to love----she’s an easy character to gloss over because she’s not bombastic like a lot of others are. Speaking not so much from a fandom perspective (because she is very loved in the fandom, namely GC’s Korean fandom, where she’s one of the most popular characters) but from the perspective of roleplaying and seeing the kinds of characters people tend to prefer----Elesis is just not it. She’s not that consumable, and threading with her (and me in general) takes a ton of time and back and forth before she gives way to cuter threads or in-depth things. She’s not really defined by anything outright. It can easily be said that she isn’t anything. Her character doesn’t seem consistent----she’s a lot of things at once, rather than being “a good girl” or “an evil woman” or “a villain” or “sweet and candy-like” or “a sultry femme fatale”----she’s none of the easily definable. She’s a lot of everything, but she isn’t any one of those descriptions. She’s a protagonist but she doesn’t act like one. She’s a warrior but she longs for something more normal, something more regular. She’s a knight but she has never been knighted. She’s not easy to take in and it can seem very pretentious, to make one character absolutely nothing. It’s off-putting and it turns people off. Also, I don’t tend to talk about her until prompted to, nor do I talk on the dash a lot about her, nor do I have many followers in the first place. All of those things make her a character that people might just not want to write with, and that’s 100% okay.

What inspired you to rp your muse? / She’s important to me. After leaving tumblr for 2-ish years following a lack of interest and seeing how toxic the dashboard was and how toxic the rpc twitter community was, I left and I didn’t look back until now. In the end, though, I want to write. Writing makes me happy. rping Elesis makes me insanely happy. I never brought her to tumblr because I didn’t want her to be ruined for me, and I’ve reached a point in my life where I’m confident enough in my own identity and my love for this character that I’ve been thinking of in silence for years to put it out in public and start writing with old friends again.

What keeps your inspiration going? / I love one (1) beautiful titty redhead sword woman. 8+ years in my lil’ brain still going strong 3:

Some more personal questions for the mun.

Give your mutuals some insight about the way you are in some matters, which could lead them to get more comfortable with you or perhaps not.

Do you think you give your character justice? YES / NO

Do you frequently write headcanons? YES / NO (though I want to)

Do you sometimes write drabbles? YES (all of my replies tend to be drabbles 3:>) / NO

Do you think a lot about your Muse during the day? YES / NO

Are you confident in your portrayal? YES / NO

Are you confident in your writing? YES / NO

Are you a sensitive person? YES / NO

Do you accept criticism well about your portrayal? / Truthfully---no. Not about Elesis. About any other character, or rather---about every other character besides Elesis, I will accept criticism. But I’ve thought about Elesis for way too long and for way too many years of my life, changing her as I go, so much so that it’ll feel too personal to me to accept criticism. But if it were any other character, I’d readily accept it.

Do you like questions, which help you explore your character? / Absolutely please please please please---it’s so hard to talk to people one-on-one about her as is, as it is for everyone about their own muses. I love questions. I love answering them.

If someone disagrees to a headcanon of yours, do you want to know why? / I’d be curious, truthfully. But it’s not bad. Anyone can disagree and if that’s the case, but ultimately, my headcanons for Elesis are my own and that’s not going to change even if someone else told me it was “wrong” or “bad”.

If someone disagrees with your portrayal, how would you take it? / I don’t really care. I’ve thought about this stupid meathead woman for far to long to feel offended at someone else’s disagreement of how I write her. Plus, Elesis Sieghart, as well as every single character of the Grand Chase, can have many, many interpretations due to how vague and up in the air their canon information is. It’s just how it is...

If someone really hates your character, how do you take it? / The only situation where I’d feel upset would be if it were a close friend telling me this after a while of talking about her---and it’s happened before. But overall, it made me sad for a minute and then it was “whatever”. They love her now, and things are good and right in the world. Someone else’s dislike of Elesis doesn’t really effect me outside of close friendships.

Are you okay with people pointing out your grammatical errors? / Absolutely! If something is off, please tell me or correct it in the reply <3

Do you think you are easy going as a mun? / I’d hope so. I don’t view rp as my life or as a main hobby, so I don’t tend to be here often and I write as I feel like it. As a mun I kind of just write here as I please because I know the people who are interested will continue to be interested and those who aren’t, I’ll know with time. In terms of friendships and rp, I do like to be talked to if I share my discord because I don’t share it often. I want to be able to develop and write and do all of those fun things I never got to do in the past due to the fact that when I used to rp as a main hobby, I was a minor---shipping back then was difficult for me, as a minor. 3: But now that I’m a lot older and, well, Legal, I can do a lot more things and explore more dynamics that I felt like I just wasn’t mature enough to do in the past. I guess, in that case, I’m a bit more higher maintenance. I hope I come off as easygoing, but I do get very intense about writing, I like it so much.

#MEMES / post #OUT OF CHARACTER / post #3:> )

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earwaxinggibbous · 5 years

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Top 10 Best Hit Songs of 2018

As I geared up to make the list of hits for 2018, I was prepared for difficulty, and I wasn’t wrong. Hence why there are a few little cheats here and there. Really anything that even had the potential to be a hit got on this list because the Hot 100 was fucking barren and I figure I’d rather give some exposure to some good artists that didn’t get what they deserved.

I do discuss alcohol/drug use briefly in my number 9 + 6 and abuse in my number 4. Let’s get this shit on the road.

10. Mine - Bazzi

This song is dumb. And I love it.

Mine by Bazzi, who no doubt will not show up on the charts next year, is a song that all of you know even if you think you don’t, because it’s the one with the memes.

You so! Fuckin! Precious! When you! Smiiiiile!

Yeah, it’s that one.

There’s not much to say about this one. It’s a quick and easy listen at only a little over 2 minutes. Bazzi has a nice enough voice, and the production manages to stand on its own. Honestly the reason it’s here is because the lyrics are adorable.

It feels very teenage, but not in the obnoxious way that Lucid Dreams is. It’s just very innocent despite the second line being about hitting it from the back. It’s a kind of innocence I can enjoy mostly unironically.

Like, whatever man. Just enjoy life.

9. Betrayed - Lil Xan

So I wasn’t actually sure when this song charted. I believe it was either late 2017 or early 2018, possibly with some crossover, but I’m counting it because I love this song so much.

Betrayed actually shares a lot of similarities with Juice WRLD’s Lucid Dreams. They were both towards the bottom on each respective list, they both have videos made by Cole Bennet, and they both have a sneaky anti-drug message.

Ironic considering his name is Lil Xan. Also I lied it’s not very sneaky at all. Which is good, if you’re gonna be anti-drug then just fucking do it. The beat is chill, the bars are chill, it’s all super chill. That’s probably in part due to the fact that Lil Xan has a super calming voice. This is weed music. Like Car Seat Headrest. And good weed music can be enjoyed when you’re sober, which Betrayed can be because it just sounds nice.

A good chunk of Betrayed is about the pitfalls of the rap game, and how suddenly everyone turns on you and wants your money, which is kind of neurotic but not entirely inaccurate.

This was actually the plot of a Jay-Z and Justin Timberlake song called Holy Grail from a few years back. And I hate to say it but this song does it way better, because it’s not trying to make fame out to be some horrible demon priestess who’s sucking your soul out of your ass, but rather, more of a lifestyle with very different complications.

Which is what it is.

So Jay-Z got outdone by a 12-year-old with face tats named Lil Xan, and if I heard about that my ego would be deeply, deeply bruised.

The only reason it isn’t higher is because, uh.

Oof, Lil Xan. Come on now.

8. King’s Dead - Jay Rock ft. Kendrick Lamar, Future and James Blake

So a lot of people actually didn’t like this song. Which... I kind of get.

Also apparently this was on the Black Panther soundtrack. I never saw that movie, but a lot of the lyrics on this, at least according to lyric genius, relate to that movie. Which I guess is why I have no clue what it’s about other than the average rap music cliches. The only thing I knew about King’s Dead for god knows how long was this gif of Kendrick eating corn in a palm tree.

I feel like the best argument against this song (other than Future’s high-pitched sampling of Slob On My Knob that made me lose my shit) is that there’s nothing really special about it. I mean yeah, Kendrick has a voice that’s smooth like butter, but King’s Dead has a generic beat and bars that just don’t stand out.

But I don’t know. I just love it.

This is just a nice fun song to chill out to. I can put it on, throw myself into bed, and let the cares of the day shloff off of my body as Kendrick whispers to me in the language of the ancient ones. This is nowhere near his best work, not even remotely close to it. All it is is nice and small and easy to listen to without being completely boring.

Maybe I also just like it because it’s been forever since a rap song really sounded like one. This is partially the fault of Future, who is on this song, and doing the same shit he usually does, but at least the rest of the song sounds like words. It feels like it’s been a whole decade since rap music wasn’t just an autotuned jumble, and while I’m easier on mumble-rap than most, I’d be lying if I said I didn’t miss good old fashioned regular rap.

Regardless of whether it’s blind nostalgia or some level of actual quality, I enjoy King’s Dead for what it is. It may just be a rock and not a diamond, but it’s my rock and I love it.

7. In My Blood - Shawn Mendes

So like, what the fuck happened with Shawn Mendes? He just kind of got really good all of a sudden. Like when every genre, every artist, every newcomer and every single is shitting the bed, it’s Shawn Mendes of all people to bring it home. That’s like if Charlie Puth turned out to be the savior of music. It’s like if Chingy developed into a rap legend. And this song, In My Blood, is about something we all wanna do! Giving up.

Okay, so that’s not exactly what it’s about. It’s about the feeling of wanting to give up, but refusing to, in a very chronological way. With the verses representing the low points and the chorus representing the swell of energy that forces one to get back on their feet. It’s an incredibly well put-together song where Shawn’s voice is actually put to good use instead of him gargling pus like he did on Treat You Better. I’d be lying if I said he didn’t emote wonderfully on this.

I haven’t heard any of the other singles he’s released around this song, but I’m definitely interested in doing so because In My Blood is an experience, kind of in the same way that like, a really good Panic! at the Disco song is. It just punches you repeatedly. You ever been punched by a song? It feels great. I wish more songs would punch me.

In a lot of ways In My Blood is also nostalgic for me, since it brings me back to an era where I actually got excited about pop music because it was important to me some-fucking-how. And I don’t mean like, I was interested in pop like I am right now. When I was littler my parents basically raised me on old alternative music and jazz, and while I definitely enjoyed it I had literally no idea what other kids at school listened to. The first pop song I remember hearing was Pokerface by Lady GaGa, I was on the school bus, and it sounded like nothing I’d ever heard before. Over time my sister began playing the radio so that her friends at her new school would stop goofing on her for not knowing any pop artists, and hearing all this new music was kind of an experience. Of course after awhile we both moved into individualized tastes and neither of us really listen to the radio unless it’s during the holidays, but hearing In My Blood somehow reminds me of a time when being a hit actually meant something.

It’s a song where you put it on and it just owns the room despite its minimalism, and with tons of easy listening alt-crap hitting the stations nowadays, it’s nice, albeit surreal, to know that Shawn Mendes is the one who gives a shit.

6. Genius - LSD

In case you didn’t know, LSD is the combined efforts of rapper Labrinth, singer Sia and producer Diplo. I hadn’t actually heard of this group until pretty recently, and I wish I had because if you know me, you know about my wretched obsession with Sia. Maybe I’m too forgiving, but I can’t remember a single bad track she’s put out. And Genius is no exception.

Lyrically this song’s a bit lacking, despite the title. But soundwise it sticks like gum, with a layered production. I always say that they should have Sia work with one of these sing-rappers, so having it finally happen is proof that god might be listening to me.

It’s like bubblegum for your brain, it’s sweet, it tastes good, it’s fun and it sticks. Even after only one listen I couldn’t get the tune out of my head. And god knows I just want the charts to be fun for once. No, I don’t think this song charted, which is an absolute shame. LSD should absolutely have the star power to hit the top 100, but I guess this just wasn’t a good year for them.

Regardless, I have heard that LSD plans to do a full project, and after listening to the rest of their short album I am more than excited. The only reason this isn’t higher up is that, judging by the group name I was expecting it to be way more of an acid trip soundwise. It’s definitely hard to compare LSD’s Genius to any other type of pop in recent years, but I feel like that’s moreso because Diplo and company have taken all sorts of elements from all sorts of pop music and sneakily fused them together.

Regardless, Genius is a highly enjoyable listen. Sia’s at top performance as per usual, Labrinth sounds really nice beside her and Diplo’s production is solid. Also I seriously recommend the music video. It’s super weird. I wish animated music videos were more common with pop, to be honest.

5. Better Now - Post Malone

I almost feel like I’ve sinned putting a Post Malone song above a Kendrick Lamar song, but god do I love Better Now.

The Post Malone conversation is still very much underway, with a lot of people saying they hated Psycho because it was boring (which I can get even though I don’t agree) and that they hated Jackie Chan because it was just really really stupid. But, much like Candy Paint, I have yet to hear anyone say they dislike Better Now. And I do honestly believe that he hit it out of the park on this one.

This one’s sort of the reverse of Genius. It has pretty basic trap production, but really nice lyrics. Possibly building on the story from I Fall Apart, though with a slightly more mature outlook, Post talks about an ex-girlfriend who he misses, trying to drown his feelings in alcohol, drugs and expensive stuff in the wake of the relationship.

A total bummer, but Post sells it pretty well.

Like damn. That’s a detail right there.

I mean, I could argue that nobody has a specific drawer for socks they don’t like, but who cares really.

Anyway, unlike I Fall Apart, which was a turn-off for a lot of people because it felt spiteful and juvenile, Better Now doesn’t really place the blame on Post or his ex, which is a much more realistic scenario. Because really, his ex isn’t at fault for no longer being in love with him, but Post isn’t at fault for pining. He’s only human. Judging by the lyrics, the story is that Post was dumped for being a druggie in this song.

Though Lyric Genius also argues this is a reference to the death of Lil Peep, who was close personal friends with Post Malone in real life. If this song is somehow in a weird roundabout way an ode to Lil Peep, honestly it does feel like it’s a good send-up to him from another rapper. Like yeah, a love song might seem weird as a tribute to a dead friend, but it definitely does feel like a mournful, sad song about longing for a close person who’s gone for the long run.

Whether this is a tribute to Lil Peep or just a breakup song, it definitely carries the weight of the emotions, partly since Post just generally sounds sad all the time. And in a year full of pissy break-up songs, this is the one that hits home more than any other for me. If Post is going off of past experience, it shows, and if he isn’t he’s just a really good actor I guess.

4. Freaky Friday - Lil Dicky ft. Chris Brown

This song is the bane of my fucking existence.

Why do I laugh at this? Why do I laugh at jokes about Lil Dicky having a small penis still? Why am I losing my shit at the idea that a white guy in a black guy’s body would immediately wonder if he can say the n-word? Why am I, a grown man with presumably mature tastes, going ‘hee hee hoo hoo’ over the phrase “I’m DJ Khaled! Why am I yelling?” And why the fuck, in the year 2018, am I actively enjoying a Chris Brown song?

Lil Dicky I have a soft spot for. We’re both Jews, we’re both stupid, we both look dead inside in every photograph taken of us. We’re basically like long lost twin brothers. Plus I do think he’s a skilled rapper, with his greatest track easily being Professional Rapper featuring Snoop Dogg, and if it had been my choice, that song would’ve been his first big hit. But no, it had to be Freaky Friday. A song that, for all accounts and purposes, is about as funny as an early Your Favorite Martian song, and yet still makes me roll into a screaming fit laughing my ass off.

I’m not gonna sit here and pretend I’m over the Chris Brown drama just because there’s plenty of worse artists charting right now. Forgetting it would be an offense to everyone involved. Do I think he’s probably matured since? Maybe. But that doesn’t excuse or explain away what he did. But for me to pretend I don’t enjoy this song would be disingenuous, and it breaks my heart to actually enjoy a Chris Brown song. In 20-fucking-18.

Everyone hates this song. And they’re valid, honestly. I just like the chorus, maybe? I don’t know. It’s hardly Lil Dicky’s best work, but fuck me. Of course I had to be the one suffering with the curse of enjoying Lil Dicky’s Freaky Friday to the point that I put it above a ton of songs that are probably objectively better, all because I laugh at dick jokes and love a catchy chorus.

But I will give it credit, this is the first popular comedy song in a long time I’ve been able to get down to. Selfie and What Does The Fox Say made me wanna scoop my eyes out with a melon baller, but of course the fucking Chris Brown comedy song makes me shriek in body-wracking laughter as if I’ve never heard a joke before.

It’s been at LEAST a year since I felt this shitty for enjoying a song, but that’s life I guess. Just enjoying bad music by bad people for bad reasons.

3. High Hopes - Panic! at the Disco

How is it that we’re having a Panic! at the Disco hit in 2018? Whatever, I’m not mad.

I mean, come on. A swelling Brendon Urie anthem about finally being able to achieve your dreams and shit? That’s really all I need on a bad day, isn’t it. Thanks 2018.

I don’t even remember if this song has good production or not. It’s really loud. Everything is loud. Do you think I care if it sounds good? I mean, Brendon sounds good, but like. Biz Markie’s Just A Friend fills me with emotion and it sounds like it’s being sung by a donkey. My standards are not high. Maybe I’d need higher standards to not like this song.

Frankly, I don’t care if the production is bad. Because this song is just good mood music, and I like that it’s loud. I want Brendon to scream in my ear about having high hopes. Do you think I care how it sounds?

No but really. It’s a perfectly well-built song, Brendon performs well on it. Bless this shit though. If there’s anything that represents hope in my mind, it’s Brendon Urie skittering up the side of a building while singing about having high hopes and his mama and whatever whatever. In a year full of dour break-up songs and people dying and abusers getting famous, all you can really have is high hopes. And that’s all there is to it.

2. Neva Lavd Yah! - Dusty Ray Bottoms

Can we all agree RuPaul’s Drag Race is kind of a hack show at this point? I mean, Season 10 was a disaster and so far AS4 has been a disaster too. I’m not even sure why I still watch it at this point.

Anyway, this is kind of a cheat. Neva Lavd Yah! charted on Billboard LGBT, and actually charted pretty high. Not the actual Hot 100, but do you think I care anymore?

So we’re all mad that rock music is dead, and that the only remnants we have of it is Imagine Dragons and other similar garbage. But don’t fret (unless it’s on a guitar) because Dusty Ray Bottoms, queen of my heart, is here to solve that problem. Full electric guitar and drums. No autotune. Just pure Dusty Ray on the track here to kick ass.

I guess Neva Lavd Yah! is a generic “fuck the haters” anthem, but for once I actually believe it. Maybe it’s because it’s being sung by a 50-foot-tall gay man with dots all over his face. Maybe it’s just because, with every drag queen doing techno music, Dusty Ray has done something completely different. God knows I was sick of every drag queen doing overproduced electronica about nothing at all.

Neva Lavd Yah! isn’t polished or clean. It’s screaming and loud and full of passion. Sometimes you’re just a 50-foot gay who wants to yell, sometimes you’re a 5-foot gay who wants to yell. Maybe you don’t feel like yelling right now, but you’ve probably been in that mood before. Neva Lavd Yah! is for when you wanna chill in a garage with an electric guitar and write songs and then scream with your shitty garage band and it’s the 90′s and you’re gay.

Damn right.

And before we move forward,

let’s hit those honorable mentions.

I Like It - Cardi B ft. Bad Bunny and J Balvin

This song really did almost get on the list, and I mean it was like a baby dick’s length away. I almost feel bad that I let Mine on instead. Cardi I am so sorry.

Nice For What - Drake

This was the only good song Drake released this year, and while Drake talking about “strong women” on the same album as I’m Upset seems like bullshit, I’d be lying if I said this wasn’t at least kind of a banger.

Now or Never - Blair St. Clair

This was the only other big drag queen hit I remember this year. It was released in the wake of Blair St. Clair coming out about a sexual assault, and while I do think it’s an empowering song, I don’t like the way it sounds that much.

Pray For Me - The Weeknd ft. Kendrick Lamar

How I liked King’s Dead more than this I can’t even explain to you. The beat on Pray For Me rocks my tight ass though. Plus let’s be honest, The Weeknd and Kendrick are a fucking dream team.

I Love It - Kanye West ft. Lil Pump

I can’t hate this. Fucking look at it. They’re in roblox costumes!

Famous Prophets (Stars) - Car Seat Headrest

Not a hit, which is the only thing that kept it off of here. Consider Song of the Summer by Remo Drive, Humanity by Gorillaz and When You Die by MGMT also in this spot.

On to number one, and if you know me you probably know it already.

1. Kamikaze - Eminem

Listen. I don’t care if this didn’t chart. I don’t care if it didn’t get close. I don’t give two fifths of a fuck if Eminem isn’t as good as he used to be. I don’t give a single rat’s ass.

Because I fucking love Kamikaze.

(The song.)

The album was fine, I wasn’t huge on the whole “call out everyone” angle it took. Sure sometimes it landed, but other times, like with the Tyler the Creator diss, it was completely pointless and kind of petty.

But the title song? It bangs.

The lyrics are good, obviously, it’s an Eminem song and he hasn’t been struggling with lyrics since... Revival I guess. The production on Kamikaze is interesting, the chorus is catchy. I just love it. It puts me in a good mood for reasons I cannot explain using words of the English language.

Maybe I just love Eminem too much. But in a year of stolid depression like 2018, all I wanted was for my favorite rapper Eminem to say “fuck” and yell a lot and just be kind of motivational in his weird way. And he did it. And I understand if people don’t enjoy Kamikaze (the song or the album) but I just can’t not love it, it makes me so excited every time I hear that intro. I feel like a child almost.

I saw Eminem live for the first time this year at Governor’s Ball. It was an experience. My feet were killing me because to get good spots, my sister and I had to sit through Chvrches. (Didn’t like them very much.) It was loud and crowded. It started raining, I was cold as shit and tired and this enormous drunk guy in a wifebeater nearly elbowed my head clean off of my shoulders just due to a lack of spacial awareness. And I didn’t even give a shit until it was over.

The music ended, and I realized I was freezing my ass off. And that’s what good music does to a guy I guess. And being able to download a new, really good Eminem song was like capturing that moment in a bottle. A bottle of white boy spite, but a good bottle nonetheless.

Of course I’m biased. God knows if this song is actually better than something like In My Blood or Genius, but I love this song too much to put it any lower than number one.

Whenever I need motivation or I’m just really pissed, this song is here for me to listen to, so I can lose my shit by the side of a man who I’ve literally begun referring to as my dad at this point. And that’s just what I want. A song that I can feel next to. A song that can feel with me. And as good as some of these other songs are, I don’t feel with them like I do with Kamikaze.

See you next year, I guess.

#top 10 #top 10 list #top 10 best hits of 2018 #year end countdown #panda posts #positive review #pop song review

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doc-boredom · 6 years

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I guess Valentine’s Day is as good as any to write up a sappy post.

Lots of love under the read more.

I wanna thank Jules ( @witch-of-bliss ) for being my best friend. You are absolutely wonderful, you are ridiculously pretty, you are talented and I cannot believe that fate and chance came together in order to make us meet. Could you imagine going back to fourteen year old Natalie and Jules and saying HEY ya lil binches, you’re gonna be moving in together ten years from now, in CHICAGO!!! They’d probably be like oh wow oh shit neither of you have bangs anymore what the hell???? why are you wearing a cone on your head what’s happening? and we’d be like “go play FFX you little nerds khimari likes chocobo brains ok gotta blast haha.”

Thank you for going to Colorado with me, for being that person in my life who is open and is the yin to my yang. We have always brought out the crazy in each other, but that’s what makes us so good.

I wanna thank Beefy ( @cremedoodle ) for being talented and wonderful and someone who I also came across by absolute chance. If it hadn’t been for my ex showing me a Wild Woody video, I would have never liked Oneyplays, and my life would have been absolutely different without it. I’m not here to talk about them, I’m here to talk about you! You have inspired me and I can only hope I’ve done the same for you. Without your art and your excitement, I would have never gotten this far. Plus, ur just a crazy kid and I love you for it. One of these days we’ll meet up and we’ll smoke and it’ll be chill AF

i wanna thank Sarah ( @agentduckorico ) for reaching out to me when I was just joining the TWRP fandom. You are awful and i mean it in the most loving way possible. You are my enabler, you are the source of me going “SARAH.” and “Sarah......” every time I check Discord because you’re so unapologetically you. Plotting sessions with you are always the best and you are a general joy to talk to. I still want your Bunbos. I will also visit you and I will hug the HECK out of him!!!!!

I wanna thank Jackie ( @checkitandbalance ) YOU ARE SO SILLY and I love it! Your art is amazing and I’ve watched you grow as an artist over what has only been a few months and I am so glad you made that stupid meme about Ring Rang. YOU ALSO LIVE IN FLORIDA, SO I’M GONNA TRY TO VISIT YOU TOO and trust me, we’re gonna have a grand ol time.

I wanna thank Tobi ( @julianloveblog ) YOU!!! I still can’t believe how we met! It’s too funny. We’ve already met IRL once and you were a lil punk and it was so much fun. Tobi, you are absolutely wonderful and you always surprise me with your maturity and your open mindedness while also just being a lil fandom troll. That’s the best of both worlds. Can’t wait to see you again in April. Soon you’ll be 18 and we can go to ALL of the concerts, most importantly TWRP!!!!!!!!

I wanna thank Uru ( @uruhead ) never forget how i found you at 2 AM on GOOGLE after working an audit shift (prompting us to find out we were hotel buddies when I told you.) I LOVE YOU. I really, really do. You are amazingly talented and fun to be around and I’m so glad you had the patience to wait when we were running late so we could finally meet. Your cuddles are also just PERFECTION and I can’t wait to see you in April as well.

I wanna thank Katie ( @woahtwrp ) KATIE. YOU are the coolest kid on the block. You are a hoot to talk to. You’ve got sass for days but you’re just also the easiest/nicest person I find myself talking to. I wanna read more books with you, and scream about Havve, and just keep being ur mom cos ur the best kid anyone could ask for ;-D

I wanna thank Chloe ( @chlogay ) I don’t remember what prompted us to start talking but you are over the top insane and I love it. Your another kid that I wanna just adopt and take home. You never fail to make me laugh and while I worry about you, I know you’re doing great and I love you, you got it?

I wanna thank @wvant8786 for being one of the chillest, coolest, nicest people I’ve talked to about TWRP. You are an absolute treat and I’m glad we talk so often. Maybe one of these days we can meet up for a TWRP show.

I wanna thank @aishisa for doing the podfic for SLM. Seriously, I mean it still, I want to pay you you punk.

I wanna thank @garbage-boi-stink-man for being one of the first people who wasn’t Beefy to make fanart of SLM (that I knew of???) Ross, you are lovely and talented and Pea Bee is gonna get a chance to shine one of these days, I promise you.

I wanna thank @davie-freedom-jones for making the Amino for SLM. I promise you I’m gonna talk to you about Discord soon. I ALSO JUST LOVE YOUR ART.

I wanna thank @chaoticmindelectric. Dylan, you are just- like i cannot believe you are 17 and so GOOD at art. It’s insane. Plus you’re just a joy to talk to and I wanna put an effort to talk to you more. Sometimes I just need a lil push or reminder. Thank you again for your commission work, your positivity, and just general BEING.

I dont know if I’m missing anyone, but y’all know I love you all. Seriously. Talk to me more, come to me about stuff, I wanna be there for you all cos you’ve all made me feel so loved and confident and you gave me the strength to make some tough decisions. Thank you for that. Thank you all.

#GAY ASS EMOTIONAL POST

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nikkithomas · 6 years

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Save The Butterfly

It’s been two years since my doctor told me that I needed to start keeping a journal of my daily diet and working out. I told him that I HAD been doing all of that for 6-8 months and seeing no real results. That’s when he stopped dead in his tracks and said “we’re checking your thyroid”. Sure enough...my thyroid appeared to be for ornamental purposes only.

I’d been through this before. Most doctors test your TSH and when the values look normal...they just let it go and tell you that you’re fine. Thank goodness this doctor looked even closer at what was going on and knew to test my T3 and T4 as well. It wasn’t until over a year later when I felt horrible even though I was taking medication (levothyroxine andl then later liothyronine) that I went back to another doctor (I had moved to a different state at that point and really hadn’t been in to see a doctor since moving) and it was discovered that my levels were way off. The second doctor tested my TPOab and they were way out of whack.

Doctor #2 took me off of the levothyroxine/liothyronine combo...and took it down to just the levothyroxine and upped the dosage. By spring, I felt like garbage again and sought out an endocrinologist with the help of my primary physician. It took MONTHS to get into her practice...but when that time rolled around...she sat me down...looked at my blood work and told me that she would have had me hospitalized if she had seen the blood work that my primary saw several months before. She diagnosed me with autoimmune thyroiditis. Hashimoto’s disease.

I started reading everything possible. Dr. Internet had a whole lot of nothing to say.

Fatigue? Yeah. Swollen face? You betcha. Weight gain? Damn right. And lots of it. Sleep problems? Uh...yeah. Big time. Anxiety? Yep. Muscle pain? OMG yes. Sometimes so bad that it brought me to tears. Hair loss? Lil’ bit. Brittle nails? Yeah Weird swelling? Mmhmm I even had problems with my tongue. WTH?! EXTREME Vitamin D deficiency? Oh yeah...that too. Weird low body temperature? I average around 97.3 degrees to the average persons normal of 98.6. I am truly...cold-blooded. I burn up all the time though. Odd.

It was so frustrating. It was as if everything that had gone haywire in my body was now readily explained with this diagnosis.

First off...I was worried and relieved all at the same time.It was like a light went on and everything fell into place. THIS is why I was so tired. I’d work 12-14 hours a day and go home and go straight to my couch or to bed. I still do. I’m not complaining because I love my job. BUT...I have to admit that it had become increasingly difficult to push through for all those hours. Even now with medication it’s tough but I do it. When I wake up at random hours in the night and can’t get back to sleep...I find things to work on. It’s how I’ve adjusted to the situation. This has been going on for YEARS.

Secondly...it was concerning because I wondered how much damage had been done and was now irreparable because it had gone untreated so long.

Third...even with an explanation about my weight...that didn’t really help me feel any better about it.

I started thinking back and it was overwhelming to process things like my erratic body temp issues...my face getting red in the past (and even now to some degree...) having TWO major surgeries for things that could have been controlled and treated with medication. The crazy weight gain. (I am basically the size of a small to medium size village at this point.)

What a ripoff.

How in the hell did this go on so long without being diagnosed!?!?!

The levothyroxine sucked. I had felt better with the mix of synthroid and cytomel. My friend Amy in Arizona had Hashimoto’s and had recommended Naturethroid. I begged my endocrinologist to switch me out and she did. It was awesome!! I felt so much better. Not great....but better. Not like a melted candle on a summer sidewalk...but more of a semi-melted ice cream cone on a spring day.

THEN...there was a national shortage?! No. Seriously. That happened.

Walgreen’s ran out of Naturethroid. Almost all pharmacies ran out. That’s when they put me on Armour. Garbage. Lame. I might as well have been licking chalk every day. I gained even MORE weight. Was super tired. Depressed. It was terrible.

Finally...I found a pharmacy that carried Naturethroid and even though it wasn’t an accurate dose...was able to break it into something that seemed to work.

One of the hardest things about this stupid thyroid disease...disorder...whatever you want to call it...is that it seems to take forever to get the dosage correct. I’m still not 100 percent. I’m still getting bloodwork done more often than I’d like. Just to function. Just to live. I keep reminding myself that there are so many others who have things that are so much more difficult to live with...and that puts it into perspective. It still sucks though.

I hate the memes about this disease. Annoying. Basically...there are two varieties: the “omg I’m so tired and you don’t understand” garbage...

Okay. Seriously?

Just STFU.

If you feel like you have to put that out there...the people around you suck. Stop talking to those losers and caring what those bitches think. Just...STOP. The whiny memes are not inspirational. They’re just...whiny. Yeah yeah. You’re sick...I’m sick...we’re all sick. We’re all trying to get by...blah blah blah.

Sorry sweetheart...but we’re all on a one horse open sleigh...straight to the grave. All of us. No one will make it. There will be no survivors. Suck it up. We’re all dying. There are people out there with cancer and a bajillion other things that are excruciatingly painful. Hypothyroidism sucks...and it isn’t easy...but come on. Try not to live in that head space. We all want to take a nap...under our desks...ten minutes after we get to work...but still...

Listen...if you feel like you have to explain yourself and your battle to people...maybe those people aren’t really worthy of being around you? Something to think about. Your pain is real...the fatigue and symptoms are real...people who genuinely love and care about you...will understand. Anyone that would try to make you feel bad about what’s going on with your health...probably isn’t worth your time and effort anyway.

(Thyroid Cancer...is pretty scary. I literally had one doctor tell me that if I ended up having thyroid cancer...that it was the “best kind”. For the people that have lived through that...you go ahead and you post the memes. You’ve earned that right.)

And then there are the dicks that make fat jokes. I don’t mind the fat slurs. I have to admit though...the acceptance of that form of discrimination makes me laugh. It’s totally fine to trash someone for being fat and treat them like they’re less than human...but a lot of those same people that discriminate against the “glandular challenged”...seem to get offended over other forms of discrimination. The hypocrisy...is awesome...not really.

Except for this quote...this one is actually my favorite...

Gets me every time. Fat or not...that’s just...funny.

They can make all the gravy jokes they want...deep down...I can’t wait until their glands fail them and they start to chub up later in life...or until their wives leave them because of their impotence issues. But...I digress...

If you’re living with this garbage...I’m sorry. If your “journey” (that’s my least favorite blog buzzword EVER...”journey”)...is anything like mine...I wish you the best of luck and hope that you find the right mix of medication for your condition. I’m still on the struggle bus trying to find mine. As you work your way towards a workable solution...and maybe start losing the weight and get some of your energy back...just remember the people who weren’t there for you or made you feel like less of a person...and make a note of it. That’s who they really are...deep down. Don’t you deserve better than that in your life?

I’m going to go grab 45 minutes of sleep and then go to work. Namaste’ people.

#thyroid disease #hashimotos #thyroid-hypothyroidism #stress #insomnia #i need sleep #thyroid #thyroid problems #weight #angry #frustrated

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pyrrthea · 7 years

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I really have no excuse for this, I just wanted to see if I could brighten up the days of people who really brighten up mine

@crowndefiant cassie, you are literally my best friend in the entire world and i love you a lot. thank you so much for always being there for me, even when i probably didn’t deserve it, and for brightening up my day by literally just putting up with me. i love you so so much and you mean the entire world to me. as for your writing, you already know i think it’s phenomenal. be it some dumb crack on this hell site, or your gorgeous novel that’s going to turn you into a new york times best selling author, you could write about a cardboard box and i would die for it <3 your dumb jokes, your kindness, your willingness to always be there for me by my side all makes me so happy to have you in my life, and i want you to know that i’m always going to be here for you no matter what.

@anorablespark josie!! you’re about 95% of the reason why this blog exists and probably why i still roleplay at all. you following me all the way back on p//bg was a shock because you seemed like such a high quality blogs and back then i was a total mess (i still am. that is beside the point). despite my total lack of confidence in any of my abilities, you were nothing but kind and caring to me in a time where i was considering giving up writing all together, and you made me a lot less nervous joining this fandom by introducing me to some of the most amazing people here that i love and admire, you are one of them. you’re nora is one of my favourite muses ever on this fucking hellsite, and even though we say we have to plot and we never do, what little we’ve done with nora and pyrrha’s relationship makes me smile, and your nora makes pyrrha smile a lot too. your backstory for her has so much though, love and care put into it, and i want you to know that i love it, and i love you, and all of your muses and headcanons. don’t forget that.

@starsetdiva maaaaaayyyy~ as someone who has tried, struggled, and failed to take a background character with like five lines of dialogue, and turn them into my own, let me tell you this, you have done a phenomenal job, with both neon and arslan. the care and effort into everything you do for your muses makes me so happy that there are people like you, who are willing to do all that for a character they love, and i respect you so so much for that. you’re always there to make me laugh, be it ooc or ic, and i’m glad we live in the land of fucked up timezones, because being able to see you on my dash, and talk to you, makes me so happy. i know how self-conscious you are about your writing, and i know exactly how you feel, but i want you to know that i genuinely love and enjoy all of your writing, and i would so so so so soooo love to write/plot with you some more, i just,,,, need to come up with some plot ideas <3 i’d follow you on any muse to the end of the fucking earth, and rest assured, i will always be around to icon whoever or whatever you need lmao

@mirrornium chloe, you’re pretty okay for someone who shits on my lawn. nO BUT REALLY, in all seriousness, i was really sad when you just sort of disappeared off my dash a while back, because you always made me laugh a lot with your drake bell icons buT NOW YOU AND YOUR DRAKE AND JOSH SHITPOSTING IS BACK AS WELL, and i could not be happier. we haven’t talked a lot one on one but everytime we speak, be in privately or in a group of people, you never fail to make me laugh until i’m in tears, and i couldn’t ask for anything more from you.

@bloomess stELLA WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU SO NICE TO ME. you’re literally the best, like god damn woman, you are so kind and funny and you’re always doing nice things for me and saying nice things to me, which i don’t???? deserve??????? like dang man what’d i do to deserve you, like, what the fuck. ad you!!!! put up with me sending you memes that make me think of you/ur ruby, who is the absolute cutest think i lov okay. i lov you, and uhhh i love ur ruby, and pyrr lovse rooby 2, her lil cowgirl gf yeehaw. wE HAVEN’T HAD A PROPER THREAD YET BUT UHH I RLLY WANT 2 WRITE WITH YOU BECAUSE I LOVE HOW YOU WRITE RUBY IT GIVES ME A REASON TO LIVE LIKE DAMN WOMAN. but yes i love you a lot and i would die 4 u but u already know that so okAY BYE NOW Y’ALL

@saecris meh. NO I’M KIDDING I LIKE YOU A LOT MORE THAN JUST meh. you better full well know how much i love you and how much i love your ren. you are so kind and funny that it like genuinely confuses me like how is??? that possible like dang. i really really really enjoy talking to you ooc so much, and our ic interactions are a lot of fun too, even if it’s just pyrrha and ren acting like children and also that one time they were being nerds about books or something. speaking of, i love your ren. so so so sos os sosososoooos o soooooo sooooooo much. your headcanons and backstory are so well thought out and genuinely interesting and make me want to care about him so much more and i just 👏 👏 👏 👏 👏 👏 👏 👏 👏 👏 👏

@nctdamsel how and why do you even put up with me mack. you let me yell at you about greek fire and it means so much to me that you care about these two nerds as much as i do lmA O. all of your headcanons and oc’s are so well thought out and all the care and detail you put into them shines through and makes me smile. you’re always kind and sweet and just in general way too good to me???? i love all the cute threads we do together and it makes me so happy to see you on my dash, to talk to you, write with you, plot with you, waTCH YOUR FUCKING SNAPCHAT STORY I’M LOV U MAC K

@kingdommark helL O HUSBAND <3 we’ve known each other like what, two weeks and we’re already married. i haven’t known you for nearly as long as a lot of other people, but you’ve never been anything but kind and caring to me, and it really means a lot to me that you take time out of your day to talk to me and be a nice person???? and seeing you be a nice person to other people makes me so happy, because i think we both know that this website is a place filled with unnecessary toxicity, so to see people like you who are always doing their best to be kind is so heartwarming to me. obviously i don’t know shit about KH but your sora is a massive cutie who i love a lot and enjoy seeing on my dash so much, and you can bet your ass i cannot wait for sora/pyrrha interactions

@saintlyhilt aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA??????? hello yes, shi did you know that you’re an absolute blessing and idk how we haven’t interacted much outside of crack/dash comm, because i’m pretty sure our first ooc interaction was just me telling you how thirsty i am for jaune so. i lov seeing u be gay on my dash and the rare times we talk make me happy because you’re so kind and caring and i don’t know if you know it but you never fail to make me smile all the gosh darn time, and i literally cannot thank you enough. your writing and headcanons for both sun and jaune are so well thought out, interesting, and so much fun to read. i just want you to know that you’re really important to me and i appreciate you a lot.

@adornedscars jhuwan, you may be one sassy fucking piece of shit, but you know what? i wouldn’t have it any other way, because you make me laugh and smile a lot, especially when i need it most, and our stupid running joke of fox calling pyrrha a bitch is one of my favourite stupid thing to happen on this blog. you’ve literally taken a character with nothing and made him your own in a way that literally just???? makes me forget that he doesn’t even have a canon fucking voice actor. you are one of the most important people i see on my dash, and one of the funniest too, and even though we don’t talk a lot, i’m glad we’re friends.

@baddrunkcharm hEY ASHE DID U KNOW THAT UR LIKE MY FAVOURITE QROW AND I’M LOV U AND THE WAY U WRITE SO MUCH AND U HAVE TO SHARE THOSE COOKIES WITH ME. no but seriously you’re another person who i just??? haven’t talked to a lot because i’m a nervous bean and you’re just super cool and i love your writing and characterization so fucking much man like dang. and!!! i super hope we can interact more, both ic and ooc, because!!! i’m going to fight you either way!!! but with hugs, and puppies, and love, because,,,, i love seeing you on my dash, and talking to you, and just knowing that you exist.

@miragesque heLLO YES WE HAVE LIKE NEVER SPOKEN BEFORE BUT LIKEDANG SEEING YOU ON MY DASH MAKES ME REALLY HAPPY DA N G. seeing how much you love and care about blake makes me so happy because i 101% absolutely know how you feel to be absolutely in love with your muse, and to see other people that just care so much makes me get all emotional, and it all really shows through in your writing because like????? you’re probably one of the most stand out blakes i’ve ever seen on this god forsaken hell site and it makes me all giddy and smiley and happy to see on my dash because you’re an amazing writer, and i am just a small bean, hoping that one day i’ll build up some more courage to sAY HE L L O.

#█▐ ᵒ●✧ ┊ ➳ 「 ιѕ тнιѕ eαѕy мode? 」 OOC.#aLL O THESE TURNED OUT WAY LONGER THEN THEY WHERE MEANT TO BE #I'M SO SORRY GUYS #anyway i'm going to sleep because it's late!!!#this is about 2000 words #why can't i write this much about my headcanons #or in my replies #or my fanfictions #hold me someone #i'm going to make another post with more people on it tomorrow because this started as about 30-ish people but i had to cut it down #it was getting so fucking long

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ancientcalamity · 7 years

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『 193 out of 200 followers... Pfft, close enough! Hello, everyone! Thank you all for following me. I'm grateful and... it's been many years since I last made a Follow Forever or anything like this; been years since I've trusted people enough to really bother, so it was hard for me to do. There's going to be that bias list below, the different people I know/have come to know/am in the process of getting to know and that have changed me for the better I guess you could say? So, to all of you, even if you aren't on the list,

thank you.

I’d like to put a warning here that it gets pretty personal below the cut, so for a tl;dr of the names, they are as follows:

@guidcnce

@blessedbisha

@divineveena

@hafuriyuki

@calamitouscyan

and last but not least, @shinxki.

Not only are they extremely skilled as writers, they’re extremely wonderful people altogether.

Now...

If ya continue to read, it’s yer choice now. It’s long. 』

As a child to early teen, I'd gone through multiple different types of abuse ranging from sexual to mental and while I'm not a coo-coo person going out to murder random people (lol) or anything like that, I do have mental illnesses and I've had physical disorder(s?) that I'm still going through/getting past thanks to my history.

Each day, I feel horrible waking, honestly.

Don't feel worth it. I'm obnoxious. I'm pushy. I'm clingy. I'm a creep. Still getting to know myself as a person. Still getting to understand emotions again. Still getting to being normal in some way. Still trying to get to the point of not blaming myself for any and everything bad that happens to me or my loved ones.

Those sorta things and of course the other usual stuff besides depression.

Anxiety.

Mild schizophrenia.

Extremely mild dissociative disorder.

aaaaand lastly paranoia.

I don’t think I’m too ‘out there’ with my mental issues and I think I’m sane enough to handle myself out in the world so yeah. My eating disorder isn’t here any longer but I do forget to eat by accident (woops!) so my anemia decides to go

and so, I, in return, go

“-dies-”

I came to the Noragami roleplaying fandom on October 22nd, 2016, but I wasn’t really... out there and not known to much of anyone. I didn’t post for long periods of time, too, and I just sorta accepted it cuz ya know? I was new. I met a few blogs here and there but low and behold that didn’t work out but I’m pretty used to having shit go down the drain for me. It wasn’t odd or anything for me and for a bit I’d though about deleting, remaking, and going to another fandom.

Fast-forward to late November-beginning December and I get a follow back by @guidcnce. “Whoa! Cool! A Kazuma! Holy shit a Noragami blog is following me!” I said, getting overly excited as I ate my Oreos that day-- “Lemme check out their blog!”

Lil’ ol’ me goes to see the blog, I’m happy, excited-- and my eyes fall on @calamitouscyan, @divineveena, and @hafuriyuki.

“....Shit.”

“Okay, so 1.) There’s another Yato and holy fuck, his blog is great, 2.) There’s a BISHAMON ( @divineveena ) but she talks to @calamitouscyan too (fuck me sideways) and 3.) A YUKINE! ( @hafuriyuki ) YAAAA- fuck he tALKS TO @calamitouscyan too?!?!? HOW FUCKING FAMOUS IS THIS DUDE?? Shit, they must’ve been here for such a long time, shit shit shit shit shit--”

Insert panicking and anxiety filled Cel here! -pops party streamers- WOOOOOOO! Yer not good enough!! Fuck yeah! You got people that’ve not only been here WAY longer than you but your blog LOOKS LIKE TRASH AND SO DO YOUR ICONS! NICE!

Yooooooooooou suuuuuuuck!

I suck it up, keep my emotions to myself and wing it with @guidcnce; I got new followers, I meet with OCs and canon rpers, I talk and plot with people, things goin’ great! Kazuma’s bitch ass is being one of the nicest people I’ve met and holy fuck if it wasn’t for them being so nice/lenient with me I wouldn’t-- WAIT. THAT’S NOT IT!

DID YOU KNOW MY YATO IS NOT A /NORMAL/ YATO??? NO?

...

why the fuck are you reading this then?

Go read my About and Rules, you fucker I swear to GOD I WILL FUCKING END YOUR LI-

....

..........

...moving on.

Kazuma had the NERVE to not ONLY reply to my starter with them in canon (well written canon might I add if you don’t follow them you might wanna do so cuz ya know they’re great and stuff and mhm good shit-- A-ANYWAYS-), but also responded to my character AS IF THEY WERE IN THE SAME VERSE AND WORLD AND SPEAKIN’ NORMALLY-- I just...

I WAS EMOTIONAL OKAY???? I STILL AM.

I STILL AM DAMN YOU.

...They didn’t just treat me right when we met and talked in private but they did so in rp and... I think because of them I started to open up more. Finally, I got in gear with my blog and icons and every thing in general for Tumblr. I made a brand new follow post and I was excited and--

....why are @divineveena, @calamitouscyan, and @hafuriyuki following me??? ........no.

no.

NO.

NONONONONONONONONONO--

I’M NOT READY FOR THIS WHAT IF THEY THINK I’M SHIT WHAT IF THEY MOCK ME WHAT IF THEY TALK ABOUT ME THEY SEEM LIKE FRIENDS I’M NEW WHAT IF-

aaaaand here goes panicking Cel x2.

These people are following me, reblogging from me, SENDING ME ASKS--

I get invited to a group of other people and... I’m afraid. Skeptical and looking back at it, I still am sometimes but... that’s something for another day.

@calamitouscyan, @divineveena, and @shinxki are the main others there and it feels like going to a party in the Office and you know how everything is awkward? Yeah that.

There are a few others that I’m sad to say are no longer there but... I don’t hate anyone. Was raised differently than that.

A month goes by and I feel better to talk to others, a few events have happened, and it looks like I have a brand new roleplay partner! Not only did @calamitouscyan and @shinxki include me in something I never thought I’d do- having an OC shinki, a LIVING-- ...dead? ... breathing? ...

fuck it, whatever-- AN OC SHINKI THAT WE LITERALLY FIGHT TOGETHER, but they were supportive during the whole time. @hafuriyuki joined us soon and both of the shinki got along and just...

Everyone was together. An actual family and a group. @calamitouscyan turned out to be another ‘self’ (DICEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE) ((don’t ask, they’ll get it)) in not just rp but /outside/ it too because of our cultural similarities and it moved to the point I showed a game I was playing and they joined. THEY JOINED AND WE DANCE TOGETHER IN GAME!

I’M NOT KIDDING, LOOK!

I have a friend to play with!

Outside of the game, @divineveena ruins my FUCKING life because we managed to make a relationship for Older!Yato and Bishamon, you wouldn’t be able to tell that they tried to kill each other at one point.

A BrOTP to such a point-- ugh it’s been years.

YEARS.

Trusting people has not been something I do and after YEARS of agony she managed to be my literal best friend and it makes me want to cry.

FUCK WE CAME UP WITH STUPID AS FUCK ‘CRINGE’ MEME ICONS. SHE HAS ONE OF BISHAMON. HERE’S YATO.

It’s AMAZING.

The amount of memes we make it fuckin’ stupid. I love it.

and now there’s another Bishamon- not giving me two of the same type of person but a Bishamon who’s tragic and heartbroken and has problems @divineveena but another who’s ALSO tragic but also healing and softer. @blessedbisha

She has tried her fucking hardest to bring up spirits and cheer up others and just do what she can for each of us- she’s like a mom. I’m Satan of the fandom so someone has to even out my evil deeds-

SERIOUSLY, though, when things are down and horrible, they keep moving.

It’s encouraging.

Both of them.

They both try so hard for everyone, even in the worst times.

Even though I know @divineveena more, I highly doubt @blessedbisha is less caring and both of them fuck up my life as Bishamons because...

ya know.

Bishamon likes beating me up and ruining my day SO YEAH.

....then there’s @shinxki.

I believe I met her around two or three months ago, after meeting the other Yato and Bishamon.

.......

...............

-deep breath-

When I ‘like’ a friend or someone it’s not /that/ type of crush. Not lovey dovey so don’t go cringing away from this post just yet.

It’s like... earlier I said I get clingy; I’ve been abandoned before, multiple times, whether it be for my sexual orientation, my race, my gender issues, my mental issues, my bluntness, or whatever the fuck else people have blown up on me and told me before they left, I’ve been dropped and left. Even recently, when I first started this blog, someone did it within a week because I left to give them space after we had a disagreement. It’s still affecting me, even now. I don’t...

I don’t do well with people hiding things or forgetting me or leaving me behind. I have the phobia about being forgotten or abandoned. It’s full blown and it isn’t pretty. I hate it, but when there’s someone who puts effort into me or something I like and at the same time they talk to me about their issues and don’t hide those things from me and trust me and want to actually bother with me and put up with me and it’s just

-rambling-

IT’S LIKE

“THIS IS MY FRIEND. THIS IS /THAT/ FRIEND. THIS IS THE MAJOR FRIEND. LOOK AT THEM. LOOK. DO YOU SEE THEM? THIS IS THE BAE OKAY LOOK.”

I guess what I’m saying is she’s close. She means a lot and I’m grateful that she

-puts up with me -likes me as a friend -is my shinki -is my ship-friend -is honest with me -is blunt -goes off on me -snaps at me -gets mad at me -doesn’t put me on a pedestal -doesn’t hide things from me

the list goes on but I guess you get the point.

......When I was either 11 or 12 or somewhere near that age, I made a promise to myself, not a nice one and the date of that promise is coming but/and for the first time in a long while, and I mean years again, I don’t know what to think about it and I’m not sure if things will end up going to that point.

To be fair, the only thing I really want now is a job and to go to school. I have a great mom and I actually have friends so... that’s all I want and...

...I think I’d be okay if I had that.

Maybe a therapist and/or a counselor again, too (lmao)...

but... I have these guys to thank for helping me get as far as I have. My life only seems like it’s a downward spiral but they all make me so happy and I owe a lot to them. I’m brash, harsh, blunt, depressed, anxious, and all around a not very pleasant person to be around and all of them try for me and each other. ...They all put themselves down or they’re unhappy in some way and it hurts, because they mean so much more than that and I don’t know what else to do for them.

I’m a person behind a computer screen so... -shrugs-

A ‘thank you’ isn’t really enough. Not a simple one, anyways.

You each mean a lot to not only me but others and I want you and other people to know that. I’m not dead yet, so ya have to be doin’ something correct, right?

...

I’mma stop rambling and leave this here for you all, alright?

𝑚𝑎𝑦 𝑜𝑢𝑟 𝑓𝑎𝑡𝑒𝑠 𝑖𝑛𝑡𝑒𝑟𝑡𝑤𝑖𝑛𝑒.

- 𝖈𝖊𝖑.

#♔ follow forever #guidcnce #blessedbisha #calamitouscyan #divineveena #shinxki #♔ personal||anxieties #personal;#♔ Promos #♔ long post #♔ large promo

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florafraser-blog · 7 years

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OOC WEEK: this or that

RAPID FIRE:

Tea or coffee? tea. leaf juice over bean juice.

Stars or planets? planets. pluto is my girlfriend.

Sun or moon? moon. u can’t stare directly @ the sun, but u CAN stare directly @ the moon.

Black or white? black, like my Soul.

The zoo or the aquarium? aquarium!!!!!! lemme watch the fishes!!!!!!

Drama or comedy? drama drama drama drama

Thriller or adventure? thriller Always.

Short walks to the fridge or long walks on the beach? can i have a short walk on the beach?

Indoors or outdoors? both. both is nice, as long as there are no bugs in either environment.

Animals or plants? animals.

Time alone or time with others? listen, human beings exhaust me, but i also require constant attention.

Introvert or extrovert? introvert.

Silence or music? music.

Darkness or light? light, but like, only well lit light.

Cats or dogs? dogs.

Dancing or being the wallflower? dancing my lil toosh off.

Right or left? right.

Werewolves or vampires? i had a rly long ‘the vampire diaries’ phase ok. immortality fascinates me. vampires.

Dressing stylishly or dressing comfortably? as i’ve said to carlie before, my style is “cultivated messiness” aka i look like i put 0 effort in but in a cute way, but i actually put 0 effort in. so dressing comfy but in a stylish way!!!!!

Sunrise or sunset? sunset.

Lead or follow? a lil bit of both. sometimes, u gotta lead when nobody else is doing jack shit, but sometimes, u gotta keep ur mouth shut and follow so that other people are responsible for the Anarchy

Optimist or pessimist? lil bit of both. it’s hard 2 be optimistic when a tangerine is in charge of ur country.

Staying up late or waking up early? staying up late!

Speaking up or staying silent? speaking up always and forever.

White lies or brutal honesty? depends on what the situation calls for. as a rule, i like to be honest, but with the people i’m close with, sometimes that will do more harm than good, and sometimes, you just have to let people come to a conclusion on their own.

Ask for permission before doing the stupid thing or ask for forgiveness after doing the stupid thing? 100% ask for forgiveness after doing the stupid thing.

LONG FORM:

Pet peeves: ppl leaving the toilet seat up, ppl who walk slowly, ppl who eat tuna in public (that shit is STINKY), ppl who stand too close to u in line, ppl who don’t ask permission before they take something of urs or touch something of urs, ppl who sneeze into their hands

Bad habits: not eating enough fruits and vegetables or drinking enough water, spending too much $$ on useless crap, liking boys, not wearing my orthotics, not finishing my food, procrastinating on my work (GUESS WHAT I’M DOING RIGHT NOW), ignoring all of my problems in hopes that they’ll go away, not charging my devices.....ever....., never cleaning my glasses, undoing the hems on all of my clothes

Favourite scents (your amortentia!): peppermint, nail polish remover, freshly baked bread, lavender, dryer sheets, petrol

Favourite animal: ORCA!!!! WHALES!!!!!!

Favourite colour: green~

Favourite place to go (local or otherwise) (photos get bonus points): there’s a student run coffee shop on USC’s campus called “ground zero” and they have the best milkshakes known to man, but they also just in general have such good study vibes and writing vibes, so i spend like 98% of my time there.

Favourite meme: the evil kermit meme

Do you have any creative or artistic abilities? i goddamn hope so!!!!!!!! i would like to think i can write semi well, and that’s about it. i can’t draw or sing or paint, so writing is basically all i’ve got. i also feel like i have Some Aesthetic sensibilities, so i’d be somewhat ok at photography and cinematography, but i’m not actually that interested in the latter, just the former.

Talk about something that made you happy today, yesterday, this week: one of my best friends came w me to see the movie “lion” on monday. i’d already seen it, but i really wanted her to see it, and she got us FREE TICKETS at this beautiful theater in santa monica, and we went, and she loved it, and just seeing her enjoy this thing that i loved made me rly rly happy :’)

Talk about an experience that made you feel proud or confident: OK i bought overalls over christmas break, and let me tell u, i have never felt more confident than i feel in these overalls bc not only do i look Good, i look Gay, and today i put them on, and curled my hair, and i feel like the prettiest goddamn human being in existence :’)

Talk about something/someone that makes you feel relaxed: carlie!!!!!!!!!! this is gonna get sappy i’m trying 2 kill her when she wakes up!!!!!!! but talking to carlie alway makes me feel really calm and chill, even if we’re being super high key about something. and if something’s going Wrong, i know i can talk to her because she always has a Good Perspective that Soothes and Supports, and i love her very dearly :’))))))

Talk about something you’re yet to try for the first time but want to: this is dumb, but i’ve never done a face mask before??? i rly want to??? i want my Skin To Feel Soft And Nourished. i also want to dye my hair and become even more of an aesthetic hoe than i already am

Who are your role models and why: 1) david fincher, for just saying fuck u @ everything and doing whatever the hell he wants 2) viola davis, for her constant intelligence and perseverance and strength 3) shonda goddamn rhimes, for creating an empire 4) amy elliot dunne, for being a BAD ASS BITCH 5) peter paige, for continuing to bring nuanced queer stories to the screen, as an actor, as a writer, as a person 6) all of the friends in my life who are just.........amazing and complicated and driven and heartfelt who constantly give me a reason to want to be the best version of myself

Talk about something you want to do this year: i want to start flossing. flossing and i have never gotten along. but my dentist told me i was like THIS close to having perfect teeth, if only i flossed more, so i was like....u know what.....why not go the extra mile......this is my new year’s resolution, and it’s lame, but it’s Mine.

#olooc #I JUST wasted mY enTIre MOrniNG IT'S fine

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aeschylusresigned-blog · 7 years

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all of them

((I’m guessing you mean the mun thing because I didn’t reblog anything else and if not and you’re just sending all of them out of context then wh o o boi I just put myself through An Ordeal for nothing.

☯ Is there a muse you’ve always wanted to play?

Yes! Nepeta!!!! I’ve always wanted to play her but I don’t have the confidence because I lack proper grasp of her character.

♣ Is there an author(s) that you look up to with your writing skills?

Ooo yes definitely. Beloved, for one, has the most amazing prose I have ever seen. I’ve learned a lot from their writing and I still aspire to someday be able to write something as breathtaking as their works. Quenive as well has spectacular writing and their stories and dialogue flow so well and j u st ohmy g od.

♧ Is there an RP partner(s) that you credit for becoming a better writer?

Definitely. I would say it was all of the people I’ve roleplayed with before that allowed me to develop Hal so much. The people in my old group chat definitely helped me flesh out different aspects of Hal that I could play (ie: sadist demon while still managing to be an angsty know-it-all) and the spontaneous connections on parp really helped me figure out how to play Hal in stupid situations while still keeping him ic.

♥ What’s your favorite ship with your muse?

Ha ha h a,,h,a,,,,wh ee zes

♡ Would you ever write a poly ship?

If anyone were actually interested in writing a poly ship with me, then yes definitely.

♦ What’s an AU that you’ve always wanted?

Oh boi there are just s o m a n y. That one godstuck au maybe. That would be fun to play out. Also the generic vampire aus I am weak for them. There’s also the au’s I’ve made that would be fun to play out but they’re difficult to explain. Merstuck au’s are also amongst the favorites to play along with dragon rider au’s I love me my fantasy genre. Whoops that was more than one but listen ok I want a lot of AU’s.

♢ What’s an AU that you think just won’t work with your muse?

Hmmm I’m not sure. I can’t think of any at the top of my head but any AU that revolves around Jake probably wouldn’t work well with Hal.

♔ What’s your opinion on teacher/student verses? Do you have any of these as threads?

I’m not personally a fan of them and I can’t say I see the appeal but if that’s what rocks another person’s boat then I’m not going to be the one hating on them. As of the moment I don’t have any as threads.

♕ Do you like magic!anons? Why or why not?

Yes!! They’re a lot of fun and I always think throwing the unexpected at my muses is the greatest thing ever.

⚜ What is the best time to write for you? Why?

Late afternoon or evening because that’s the time I’m awake and Functional and have actually thought of Creative ideas to write.

★ What type of historical AU would you like to do one day?

Maybe something based on the Renaissance period? Or the classic medieval period. Ancient Greece would also be fun to play out.

☆ What type of fantasy AU would you like to do one day?

There are many. Just, anything that is fantasy I probably want to do it. I’ve never really tried the whole AU with the fae/faeries so perhaps that would be fun to look into.

☄ Do you think your muse would have liked going to high school sports games? Do you or did you go to high school sports games?

Nope, he wouldn’t be interested in the actual sport. Going to see hot guys though? Definitely. I don’t generally go on a day to day basis because I understand like nothing. If a friend wanted me to go or a teacher was giving extra credit for me to then yeah I’d go.

☾ Do you like writing smut? Why or why not?

I have actually never written smut so I can’t really say. I think it’d be difficult for me to having had no experience whatsoever with anything relating to smut.

☽ Do you like writing angst? Why or why not?

Yes and no. Yes because I love to make my muse suffer and it’s great and fun to throw Tragic headcanons to my rp partner and to watch them suffer(not really) a well. No because,, I am a simple person,, who wants my muses to be happy,, and roleplaying angst fucking h u r t s.

☼ What’s an FC that you’re dying to use? Why?

Uhhhh???? I don’t really have one of a Real Life Person but I pretty much draw my own interpretations of Hal so? That probably counts maybe.

☀ What’s an FC that you desperately want to play with? Why?

See above.

☁ What’s an FC that you refuse to play with? Why?