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zzoguri · 2 months

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familiarity (it’s all sticky) ➵ lee seokmin

peter parker!lee seokmin x spiderman!reader

you’re not sure why you decide to show up at your ex’s place all wounded up from tonight’s battle.

genre/warnings ➵ exes (to sort of lovers?), angst, touch of fluff, afab reader (no gendered terms), hurt/comfort (both physical and emotional), discussions of wounds and depictions of blood, lowercase intended, ghost-spider au (though please don’t expect it to be accurate!), reader is obviously spiderman while dokyeom is peter parker i mean HELLO?? i am right, dokyeom is a lil a slob here, reader’s hair is long enough to be tucked behind their ear, based everything on google when it comes to patching up wounds omg, kissing fingertips, mentions of non-sexual stripping and showering (let him take care of you)

word count ➵ 4k words

playlist ➵ nonviolent communication by metro boomin, james blake, a$ap rocky, & 21 savage // hummingbird by metro boomin & james blake

a/n ➵ my svt writing debut <3 i thought this fic would also work really well for my silly dk and i wanted caratblr to have a chance to read this lil baby of mine <3 here's the original work if you're interested! and ofc, thank you to my cat @wuahae for betareading the original :’) you know how much i love you! don't forget to reblog and leave feedback!

want to be part of my taglist? send me an ask! want to request? check out my guidelines! masterlist

new york city never falls silent. the bustle of every new yorker can be heard through their footsteps, the wheels that glide against the train tracks along with the beeps of taxis sound throughout the city. the metropolis stays alive in every street, every alleyway, every corner. no matter what hour it may be, each pavement is wide awake.

but the lights seem hazy tonight; the luminescence pours out of every building, the led boards are only blurs of silhouettes and illegible words. normally, you would warn against going out if someone could barely make sense of what these signs say, but you never seem to follow your own advice.

as you swing through the city, web clinging onto every building, blood continues to seep through the white spandex that covers you from head to toe. your body feels heavy, the pain in your lower abdomen continuing to spike with every movement—every swing—you make.

you bite on your lip, holding back the whimpers. your eyes dart through every street sign you pass. with every swing, you realize you’re nowhere close to where you should be. instead…

you don’t allow yourself to think it over. maybe the loss of blood has you moving out of impulse, but for now, you can only think of getting rid of the pain.

you swing around the corner before landing down at the familiar fire escape, paint-chipped and rusted just like you remember. a hiss leaves your mouth as your hand reaches out to the spot where the blood continues to seep through, holding it down to keep pressure on the wound.

you’re face-to-face with the window; the reflection of you all suited up in some persona is a sight you’re accustomed to—but not on the glass of his window. you’re not sure why you came back here, injured in an identity he only knew of through word of mouth.

but the throbbing in your abdomen doesn’t give you enough time to think more about it. pushing the window up, you throw one leg over the edge into the apartment. your eyes quickly scan through the familiar space—a room you once treated as yours.

pillows scattered and bedsheets wrinkled, the walls are littered with the same posters of anime he swears to be the best of all time (which you agreed with), along with his desk, littered with trinkets you haven’t seen since the day you left him—ones that he talked about to you back then with so much joy.

as you attempt to get your other leg over the edge of the window, you yelp at the sharp pain that strikes. “fuck,” you whimper, gasping out a breath. another groan rips out from your throat as you force your leg over, head resting on the frame with closed eyes, bracing yourself through the wave of pain that follows.

as pants continue to leave your mouth, your senses tingle as your ears catch the sound of footsteps on the other side of the room. you attempt to stand up only for another groan to leave your lips, and you realize it’s too late—the door creaks open, revealing the man you haven’t been face-to-face with since you said your farewell months ago.

dressed in an oversized white tee and a pair of black shorts, dokyeom stands with a bag of chips in his hand and disheveled hair, eyes wide and gaping. you can only assume he was fresh from bed.

“s-spiderman?!” he looks around, noticing the mess that you’re being exposed to. before you can register it, he rushes in, dropping the bag of chips somewhere near the doorway, and tries to tidy his bed. “w-what are you doing here? i think you might’ve entered the wrong room,” he stutters as he attempts to fix his pillows and bedsheets (poorly, if you may say).

somehow, the sight of dokyeom all frazzled makes you smile behind your mask. the idea of your—no, you mean, this guy all worried about you seeing how untidy he lives makes you chuckle.

but as you laugh, pain shoots through your lower abdomen once more. you cough out before hissing, pressing onto the wound. it takes everything in you to keep your body upright until you feel a pair of hands rest on your shoulders. you look up only to be met with his worried expression.

and you spot the way his eyes trail down to where your hand rests. you’re thankful that the mask could hide the heat that rises to your cheeks.

“oh god, you need that treated,” dokyeom’s eyes snap back up to you, and your breath hitches. even after all these months, he still holds stars in his eyes.

it’s been a while since you last saw him up close. the bags on his under eyes have turned a few shades darker, and you notice an eyelash that rests on his cheek. you don’t think about what you do next, your free hand reaching out to his face, and his breath hitches. once you pick it out, you flick the strand off of your fingers, and that’s when you realize the mistake you committed.

“s-sorry,” you choke out. although you try to keep your voice as low and gruntled as possible, he frowns. he bites the inside of his cheek as his eyes flicker between your masked face and the wound.

“i-i don’t know how to help. i can call for an ambulan—”

you grab onto his arm before he can leave. as you shake your head, he gulps. “i can’t really help you,” he says, but your grip doesn’t falter. with that, he lets out a sigh before kneeling in front of you. his hands find themselves on the ledge, his arms now caging your frail figure. “do you have someone in mind who can help you?”

dokyeom’s question is innocent. you’re sure the last thing he meant was to mock your situation—showing up in a “stranger’s” room unannounced—but it strikes a chord in you.

you haven’t spoken to him since you broke up a few months back. when you’re outside of your suit, you avoid him like the plague. in the hallways of campus, you take any possible route to not cross his. but when you’re covered in your second skin, you find yourself on top of buildings watching him from far away. with the distance, you allow yourself to learn about what he’s been up to since you two last spoke.

so you don’t know why you sit in front of him all injured and dressed up in white, black, and pink spandex, because you haven’t spoken to him since that day. shame bubbles within you all while reality slowly slips from your fingertips. and the way your body gets heavier with every second that passes has him mumbling profanities.

his hands hold onto you as he makes you lean your weight on the frame of the window. “wait,” he says as he stands up and walks into his bathroom. before you know it, he comes out with a box.

dokyeom finds his spot back in front of you and he opens what he retrieved. as he looks through the supplies of bandages, alcohol, gauze, and more, he says as his eyes flicker up towards you, “i don’t know how much this will help but it’ll do for now.”

and you should be thankful that someone is willing to bandage you up after the rough night you’ve had, but it feels like a lie to have dokyeom be the one to do it, especially when you haven’t told him the truth.

so when he grabs onto the supplies he needs to treat your wound, your free hand reaches for the underside of your mask. his eyes follow where it rests, and he freezes in his tracks. your fingertips curl on the fabric as you take a deep breath.

“you don’t—”

you shake your head, cutting him off, and you close your eyes before pulling off the mask.

you’re afraid to look at the boy kneeling in front of you, for you can only imagine the annoyance—the disgust—that will paint his features. it’s not like you had a choice to show up at his fire escape this one night, but it was your choice to reveal who spiderman really is behind the mask.

a beat passes.

you’re not sure what to do at this moment. what are you supposed to do after a vigilante reveals who they are?

but when you open your eyes, dokyeom looks back at you with an emotion you can’t pinpoint. he averts his eyes, trailing down to your wound. “let me see it,” he whispers.

you gulp, an attempt to clear your throat and thoughts, before letting your hand move away from the puncture. your hand grips the hem of the top of your suit, peeling it upwards to reveal a bloody wound. from the sight, it looks like you were stabbed, but it’s only a deep cut.

he pulls out a piece of cloth, reaching out and pressing it to your wound. you yelp, eyes squeezing shut at the contact. “i’m sorry, but we need to stop the bleeding a bit more.” it takes everything in you to open your eyes. you’re met with the sight of dokyeom whose face holds a thousand emotions—you can’t identify any of them.

“can you keep pressure on it?” you only nod before you remove your gloves, afraid to touch the wound with fabric covered in grime. you dump your mask and gloves on the space beside you before letting your hand reach to where the cloth is held against. your hand brushes against his for a split second—you retract your hand immediately at the contact with his skin.

at the sudden motion, the cloth against your stomach drops with nothing left to hold it. dokyeom curses in a panic, hand shooting out in an attempt to save it, but you react faster. snatching it mid-fall, you grasp it tightly, placing the cloth back onto your wound. his eyes dart between where your hand rests and your face, a twinge of worry cast on his features, but he doesn’t give you an opportunity to say anything as he stands up quickly and walks back to his bathroom.

you hear the water run for a moment. the noises of the street fill your ears. the lights from outside cascade the floor, hues of yellow and purple filling the room. and then thunder rumbles; it shakes the floorboards. the sounds of raindrops follow, and you feel your back start to get wet from the storm that has entered new york city.

you try to push yourself off the ledge, a groan ripping out of your throat once more. and you’re finally on your feet. but at any moment, it feels like you may collapse.

“wait, wait! what are you doing?” dokyeom exclaims as he rushes out of the bathroom. he quickly grabs hold of you in an attempt to keep you steady. “don’t stand up or that wound might get worse.”

“i-it’s just the rain. i don’t want to leave the window open.” as you turn your torso, another spike strikes where your wound is. the yelp that leaves your mouth has dokyeom grip onto your arm tighter.

“no, just sit. i’ll take care of it,” he says as he brings you to his chair, his hand never leaves your arm. you let out a hiss until your bottom meets the cushion. as soon as your back rests on the chair, you close your eyes for a moment from the pain.

his hand leaves you. you hear the window shut; the car horns and barks from stray animals are now muffled.

when your eyes flutter open, dokyeom crouches in front of you with a wet towel in his hand. “i need to clean it.” you only nod before removing the cloth on your wound. he grabs it from you and places it on his lap.

as he raises the wet towel to your wound, you flinch at the contact. he quickly retracts it and asks, “does it hurt?”

“no, it’s just cold,” you mumble back. he only nods before attempting to clean the area around your wound. while he keeps his eyes on the puncture, your eyes remain on his face; hues of yellow cast upon him.

his skin glows under the city lights—did anyone know about the stars you once carved on it?

“is this why we broke up?” his eyes snap toward yours as he asks that question.

you cannot help but bite the inside of your cheek. “y-yeah,” you choke out.

he hums before his eyes go back down to your injury. “i’m guessing this is why you were distant then, right?”

you don’t bother to speak, letting the silence speak for itself.

he removes the wet towel; the white cloth is covered in patches of red. as he crumples it into a ball, you spot that his white shirt holds splotches of blood as well.

dokyeom stands up to drop the pieces of fabric on the table behind you. “your dad obviously doesn’t know,” he mutters to himself.

it’s a rhetorical question. of course, your father has no clue of your late-night rendezvous. you’re sure he could never look at you the same if he found out because to him, he would never understand what you do. he would see you only as a low-life criminal in the same way the nypd does.

dokyeom then dabs a cotton ball soaked in betadine on your abdomen. you bite on your lip as a hiss leaves your mouth. “fuck,” you curse, and he only continues to clean up your wound.

silence takes over you two. as he bandages you up, you allow yourself to close your eyes. you were thankful to find rest in these small moments. but you don’t miss the warmth of his fingertips on your skin; they feel just like last time.

“why did you come here?” his question has your eyes snapping open, and you are met with a frown resting on his face.

you bite the inside of your cheek. “i-i don’t know.” it’s a lie—one you both know. you had every chance to change the route you were taking. instead, you chose to go to his place—even if it may be on the other side of where you live.

he lets out a sigh. it’s clear that he’s disappointed by your words, but all he says is “okay,” as he gets up. “you can stay here for the night.” he stands in front of you in a shirt covered in patches of blood—it’s proof that his heart still holds a spot for you.

despite the venom that was laced in your words the night you cut ties with him, he leaves you a space for you to fill. it’s another choice you can make, but one you’re not sure if you should take.

dokyeom walks to the desk behind you and flips the lamp on. you swivel the chair so that you’re face-to-face with his slouched figure. you would’ve scolded him, but you’re not in the place to do so—not after what you two had.

but a part of you wishes to chide those words—hey, keep slouching and your back will get worse—for old time’s sake. it takes everything in you to hold back from saying the reminder, but it takes nothing to let your hand grip the back of his shirt. his movements halt.

as you sit up, you let your face bury into the arch of his back. the scent of his laundry detergent (it’s still the same smell of lavender) fills your nose, and you let your hands trail around his torso until they find their home on his waist. even after all these months, your hands knew where to rest—your spidey senses knew who to go to.

you feel his hands rest on your arms, his thumb drawing circles on your forearm. you breathe at the same pace as him. whenever his shoulders move up, yours follow. and you allow yourself to cherish just this once the familiar warmth of dokyeom. you let your soul mesh with his once more.

with closed eyes, you whisper, “i still look for you.” his thumb stops moving, and a shaky breath leaves your mouth. “i’m here because all i know is you.”

it’s half of a lie, but still a lie nevertheless. you shake your head against his shirt. “no,” you rescind. “i know i shouldn’t be here, and i had every chance to go back home, but,” you take a deep breath. “would you let me, just this once, be honest with you?”

your question hangs in the air—it’s not for him but for you. all the choices you took led to this moment, from embracing the persona you were handed through a single spider bite all the way to removing the mask in front of him.

dokyeom spins to face you. he stands in front of you with the remnants of you covering him, his shirt coated in hues of red and your blood dried up on his hands. the light behind him causes a shadow to paint his face.

but when he kneels once more in front of you, you get a good look at his features. he still looks like the same boy you first met—the same one you fell in love with—but you wonder if he was still the one you knew?

that is until his hand reaches toward your face. you hold your breath as it finds its spot on your cheek. but as his thumb grazes your cheekbone, a trembling breath leaves you. you gulp everything down—your fears and anxieties—so that you can finally be honest with dokyeom.

“i wanted to tell you who i really am.” a flicker of confusion flashes through his eyes. “and i know i’m not doing it in the best state,” a chuckle leaves your mouth. “but with every day that passes, and every injury i need to endure, i didn’t know when i would be able to tell you what went wrong with us.” a beat passes. “what went wrong with me.”

he shakes his head. “nothing’s wrong with you. what are you talking about?” a frown takes over his face. “i mean, you’re spiderman, for god’s sake.” you weren’t able to hold back the giggle that slipped from your lips.

but it wouldn’t be fair to just accept his words as is, not after the damage you’ve caused.

you let a hand rest on his, the one that rests on your cheek, and you curl your fingers so that you hold it. “i’m sorry that this is me.” the whisper is loud enough to fill the silence of his room. “i’m sorry that i crashed here all injured and left you to deal with the mess,” your eyes flicker to his bed. “especially on a night when you were resting.”

as soon as your eyes go back to dokyeom, you notice that he’s biting the inside of his cheek. “why are you telling me this?” it’s an honest question, one he couldn’t figure out the answer to. “we haven’t seen each other since you broke up with me.”

and he has every right to be confused with your sudden appearance. after all the months spent avoiding him in the halls while still seeking him on top of buildings, dokyeom was left with no clue as to why you come to him first in such a dire situation. why is it that you chose to reveal such an intimate part of yourself months after you two have drifted?

“do i have to say it?” you ask.

and he looks back into your eyes before saying, “it’s the least you can do.”

so you grab onto his hand, moving it so that it rests in yours. the sight of his fingers and palms covered in splotches of you fills your heart with warmth. it’s proof of the time he spent to patch you up. no matter who you may be—spiderman or not—you will forever be at his mercy.

“we can’t be together. it will only be another cycle of pain.” for both of you. as your eyes land back on his face, you spot sorrow coating his features.

“but i still do.” it’s an unfinished thought on his end. despite the frown you show, all he does is flash you a bitter smile. “i always have and always will.”

and it clicks.

“n-no, dokyeom,” you shake your head. “you can’t.”

he brings your hand close to his lips, letting it linger for a moment. “but you do,” he whispers into your fingertips. “right?”

even after revealing who spiderman truly is behind the mask, you expect dokyeom to rethink everything he knows. the months spent away from you should be enough reason to reconsider how much he knows of you now. but even if you two were to spend years apart, he would still read you as well as he does now.

“i can’t,” you choke out. “i can only offer so much, and you deserve so much more.”

he smiles at you—the same one you used to see every day, no matter what time of the day it may be—as his free hand reaches for your hair, tucking it behind your ear.

“i couldn’t care any less.”

you shake your head. it’s clear he doesn’t understand the gravity of it all; to be with you means to remain in constant danger. “no, dokyeom. you don’t understand. i broke up with you because i’m batshit scared of what will happen to you.”

because it seems to always occur—anyone you come close to becomes another target for your enemies. it’s already hard enough to handle the responsibility of being a masked hero, but you don’t think you could handle a possibility where dokyeom’s death would be on your hands.

but all he does is shake his head and says, “i don’t care. i still love you.”

you haven’t heard him say that to you in months. such a simple phrase causes warmth to fill your limbs and heat to rise to your cheeks. he still has the same effect on you after so long.

there are consequences that this conversation bears. you should have stood up and left as soon as he patched you up. it should’ve been obvious that the longer you stayed, the more you would pour out sentiments that you tried to keep under wraps—under the mask—and it seemed that dokyeom knew how to undo them even better than he did then.

and hearing dokyeom say those words has you falling into a perpetual cycle of torment, one that makes every day intolerable for you can only watch him from afar. but aren’t you already living it the more you deny what’s in front of you two?

so you only nod, and bring his hand close so you can feel his fingertips on your lips. with closed eyes, you whisper, “okay.”

it’s a testament to everything—one to his offer to let you sleep in this very room you once treated as yours, one to his confession that tilted your world’s axis, one to the very situation you’re in—and you’re sure he knows it, too.

he smiles as soon as your eyes flutter open. “let’s go to sleep.”

you know that sleep meant to be wrapped in his arms all while he would leave kisses on your temple. you don’t remember the last time you got enough rest, but you remember that the last time you slept in dokyeom’s arms was the last one you were able to fall into slumber at ease.

so you nod, allowing him to help you out of the chair. and he helps you through it all—shedding the suit off of you, cleaning you of all the grime from tonight’s adventure, and getting dressed in fresh clothes—until you two find your place on his bed.

nothing is said for the rest of the night. for once, you drift into slumber without any secrets stashed away.

taglist ➵ @kflixnet @blankjournal

#works of moni #kflixnet #bjnet #k-labels #seventeen #lee dokyeom #lee seokmin #dk #dokyeom #seventeen x reader #lee seokmin x reader #lee dokyeom x reader #seventeen imagines #lee dokyeom imagines #lee seokmin imagines #lee seokmin angst #lee dokyeom angst #lee dokyeom fluff #lee seokmin fluff

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rusty-gloinks · 9 months

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MASSIVE MD SPOILERS UNDER CUT!!!

This show obviously contains killing, blood, gross stuff, angst, and robo gore!!! Just a heads up!!

Again, massive spoilers for episode 6 of murder drones, please go and watch if you haven’t done so yet!!

A bunch of apps in the beginning of the episode, one of them being labeled as "ydrone", except it’s cut off and impossible to read as the frame zooms out,,,

"I use as much fossil fuels as possible - I hate the environment 💯" I LITERALLY GIGGLED.

Tried to save their friend and ended up getting their oil on their face. I just thought that was a pretty neat detail, but also being a bit sad at the same time.

Area of one of the teaser images, nice one , glitch!!

Wonderful parallel to episode 5. I love how she has to make herself taller to hold him. SO SILLY….💥💥

Pretty sure everyone’s been talking about this scene, so hopefully this comes handy in future episodes.

I absolutely love depictions of digital hologram screens, they are so awesome to me!!!!! This looks so cool , i am normal i am norma

She is so fucking scary like this. I love her.

Anddddd another…

tinkering with his hair, OUGH…. shes so silly (aside from her evil silliness)

BITING HIS HAT💥💥💥😭,,i love how he even looks up !!!!!!

There is a literally human handprint (2 of them) and what looks like if someone ran into the glass? Unless there was an "incident". Also, the raptor scratch marks don’t help either,,,erm

This show is SO fucking good at making me feel uncomfortable/unsettled, dude if I saw this I would send my ass right back up. aint no way I’m staying down here for more than 3 minutes

In fact, Human made security this human can’t control. "Maybe".

I get so abnormal when Uzi blushes it’s just so SILLYYY!!!!! like shes genuinely happy!!!!!

Uzi nodding her head when N’s right about the elevator being labeled. These 2 idiots I swear /pos

Childgiggle.mp3

SHES SO.COOL ..also Blue eye, interesting:3

"System standby" and also I believe this is the first time we get a glimpse of Uzi’s screen??

Sentinel doodle on red sticky note paper, and an override code labeled = 1234, dunno if that’s anything but here you go,,

The worker that was trying to save their friend in the beginning?? Yeah, there she is, on the table being dissected

Also, I may be stupid, but if that is yet ANOTHER Peter griffin death pose reference i am literally going to explode.

The bottles are labeled with names, and also ones that say "Corrupted core". I don’t know if anyone pointed this out but I just found it interesting to me.

I LOVE HER SO MUCH /p

N you idiot i also love you so much,what was even the point of saying this😭😭

Gross robot gore, also why is he so smiley…i understand he wants to be supportive but like.cmon your fucking rib cage is showing dude

—— CONTINUED IN THREAD/PART 2!!!!!

#Murder drones #murder drones spoilers #Wrenbles #!!!!! these are so fun to do #Long post

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thegloweringcastle · 5 months

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A Million Lifetimes

Happy holidays to @sideralwriting!! My dear, I appreciate your patience with me as I navigated life (& the gift swap) this holiday season. It has been SUCH a delight getting to know you these past few weeks and I look forward to hopefully staying in touch after the swap! I'm sorry this isn't my best work, but I hope you like it nonetheless. I tried my best to add small little details you might appreciate, and I know it's not great but I hope it may bring you some joy. <3

And the absolute biggest hug and thank you to @acotargiftexchange for being so patient with me - I'm sorry I had to be *That Person* this year. Thank you all from the bottom of my heart<3<3<3<3<3

No warnings to be found! Just silly feysand fluff and shenanigans.

_~_~_~_~_~_~_

Many people use the holidays as a time to reflect on all which has changed. Some measure how much they’ve grown as individuals, others use it as a way to mark the end of a long, grueling year - seeing the short break as a way to signify a year’s worth of change and prompt improvement for the months between the next holiday.

Feyre and Rhys, on a similar note, liked to use it as a way to track how many times they have found each other, over and over again.

***

This time the wind blew gently; not hard enough to urge people inside, but not so gentle that it went unnoticed. In the crowded holiday market of Velaris, two people huddled closer together, sharing heat and smiles.

“I’m just saying,” Feyre’s words formed between them as frosty clouds. “I still think that the winter we spent in Greenland was better than the one in London.”

“But Feyre darling,” Rhysand’s words were not as clear as Feyre’s, thanks to the scarf he kept tight around his face. “London!”

“Yes, London, but it was early nineteenth century London and we had just run into each other - quite literally - from slipping and sliding through sewage.”

“Oh, darling, you forget how I so smoothly saved us from certain doom.” He tugged the scarf away from his face, rewinding it around both of them.

“You didn’t save my shoes, that’s for certain.” She huffed. “All I’m saying is I believe you’re looking at it through rose-colored lenses.”

He chuckled. “I’m not going to win, am I?”

“No, my love. You’re not.” She offered him a pat on the cheek - a consolation.

They wandered between stalls of vendors, watching the holiday lights and decorations in quiet awe. Feyre itched to blend the colors together on canvas, perhaps make a mashup of every holiday she’d ever spent with Rhys. There would be golds and reds from the market they currently walked through, but there would also be greys and browns and greens. Light and shade, with a fair share of tears to balance out the smiles. It would be… chaotic. And perfect. A strange, haphazard image that perfectly depicted their lives.

She tugged on his hand, drawing them to a stop in front of a Bavarian craftsman.

“What about that christmas in Germany?”

“That was a pretty good year. Bloody cold though.” He shivered, as if just the thought of it sent chills down his spine. “I think it’s still one of my favorites of our firsts. It was refreshing to see you so at ease. Remember how simple it was that year?”

Yes, Feyre remembered that life well. It was among her favorites, she supposed; one of their cozier lives.

***

Feyre could feel the cold seeping through the window of the train even on the farthest side of her bench. Her lace gloves didn’t do much other than look pretty, and not for the first time she grew irked at women’s fashions for being so terribly impractical. Sure, petticoats galore were plenty warm in such low temperatures, but not very easy to maneuver; and narrow-heeled boots weren’t especially stable in slush and ice.

Nonetheless, she was enjoying her travels. Watching the world blur past the window was meditative - reassuring. There may not have been much left for her to escape, but being on the move was the only way to ensure peace and quiet - and the only way for her to feel less adrift in her search for… whatever it was she thought was missing.

The train drew to a halt, wheels screeching against the tracks as it stopped for a station in Munich. The hustle and bustle of people unboarding began immediately, luggage being jostled down the aisle and people rushing past. It was a wonder Feyre even noticed the booklet which tumbled to the floor - she wouldn’t have, if it hadn’t fallen from the pocket of a man with violet eyes.

She leaned over, snatching it during a break in the crowd while trying to keep track of her stranger. Right before he stepped off, his gaze found hers.

Her heart tugged, and before she knew it, Feyre was out of her seat - belongings snagged at the last minute - and braving the crowd to follow the man with violet eyes. The notebook couldn’t have been more than thirty pages or so, yet it sat heavy in her hand as she navigated the crowded station, ducking between people and dodging around suitcases. Feyre realized that she had lost sight of her stranger, but there was a sense of urgency she couldn’t shake. It wasn’t until she was panting for air and had almost certainly gone in circles that she slumped onto a bench, setting her things down with a clatter and letting the book fall open on her lap.

She knew it was rude to look, but it was unlikely that she would find the owner to return it. One peek couldn’t hurt; if it was a grocery list - well, nothing terribly personal there. If it was notes, or perhaps a novel in the making… She was an artist too. It would be fine.

Still, she wasn’t quite prepared for what she found on that random, worn page.

In that icy chill

Of those depthless blue eyes

I see only warmth

I wonder

How might it feel

To succumb to you

Adrift in your blue

“There you are,” A voice deep as night stood out over the din of the train station. “From the train. I’ve been looking for you.”

Feyre snapped the book shut with a resounding thwack and stood abruptly, only to be pinned in place by a pair of violet eyes.

“I’ve been looking for you too. For a while, I think.” She held out the journal. “This is yours?”

“Indeed. Thank you for finding it for me.” Their hands overlapped, making it impossible for Feyre to let go.

“This may sound odd, but for quite some time I’ve been looking for something I think I lost. You seem to be good at finding things,” She could listen to his voice forever. “Perhaps you could help me once more?”

Even as he asked, the pieces began to fall into place. Sounds of past lives ringing through to the present, urging her to hang onto him. Memories returned to both of them, and his grip moved from the journal to her hand.

“Of course.” She smiled, watching carefully for a crinkle around his eyes. “I would love to.”

***

“I have to admit, all those skirts were warm, but they sure were a pain to deal with when nature called.”

Rhys’ laugh boomed between the aisles of vendors. “And it made it much more challenging to undress y-”

“That’s enough!” She clapped a hand over his mouth before he could say anything too filthy. “We are in public, Rhys!”

He smirked. “I wasn’t going to say anything.”

“Yeah, sure you weren’t.”

“I think it’s you who let her dirty mind get carried away.” His grin was impish.

“If I have a dirty mind it’s only because you’ve rubbed off on me.”

He put his hands up, surrendering. “Whatever you say, love.”

They wandered some more between vendors, debating over their favorite holidays together and which first-meeting was their best.

“I thought it was funny when your friend introduced us,” It was a memory that Feyre often thought of, no matter how plain it might have been. “Not sure if it was the best, but it was… normal.” Out of everything, that had to count for something, right?

Rhys laughed loudly, grabbing her hand even tighter. “And he kept meddling in our business no matter how clear we made it that we were together.”

“It was flattering to know he thought we went well together, at least.” She wagged a finger at him, laughing slightly. “At least it was better than the one where you saved me from being burned at the stake. That was pretty horrid, wasn't it?”

He pulled her close, teasing and hinting at a kiss. “At least I got to play hero for you.”

“Oh,” She dragged it out. “That’s right, because we were early in the game and I was, at the time, still half convinced you were a complete prick. Yes, you did need those extra points.”

He hummed, half in amusement and half in agreement. “What about that one we spent at that inn? That was one hell of a time.”

“The place with the armadillos?” She shivered. “Unfortunately, I do remember that.”

***

Feyre did not like the high desert for two reasons. Reason one: The air was too dry, it hurt her skin and chapped the inside of her nose. Reason two: there were too many creepy crawling critters that wanted either to kill her, to eat her, or to steal her body heat.

It didn’t matter if it was winter and most animals had either migrated or gone into hibernation underground. She did not. Like. The. desert.

“Almost there, darlin’.” Rhys encouraged, ignoring the fact that she had just chewed him out in an hour-long tangent for “dragging her into the middle of nowhere for a single, stupid job in the blasted desert during a snowstorm”.

“I thought the desert didn’t get snow.” Feyre was pouting. She knew she was pouting. Unfortunately, she was too uncomfortable to care.

“This is the high desert, love. It’s a bit more dramatic than what we’re used to.”

“Rhys,” She pulled their horses to a stop and faced him. It was getting harder to see as the snowfall grew heavier. “Please tell me we’re close. I don’t want to cut this life short, I especially don’t want to cut this life short because of one stupid decision.”

“I promise you, darlin’, we’re not far.” He turned to face forward, pulling out his compass. “There’s a small town just around this bend. We’ll stay there ‘till this weather clears up.”

Feyre didn’t waste her energy responding - she wanted a hot drink and soft bed now.

Sure enough, Rhys hadn’t been lying. There was a town - small and rundown though it was, Feyre was just grateful they wouldn’t freeze to death in the most miserable place on earth.

Rhys held the door for her, the two of them stepping into an inn and stomping the snow from their boots and shaking the ice from their scarves and coats.

“Howdy there and welcome, I’m Shirley and I sure am happy to see you. What can I do for you lovely folks tonight?”

Feyre looked up from where she was struggling to undo her buttons, ready to charm the lovely owner for a room, before letting out a startled gasp.

The woman - Shirley - held an armadillo to her chest as one might hold a cat or puppy. A snake rested coiled on the hearth, another few armadillos trundled between tables at the restaurant. Other patrons sat at the bar normally, seemingly unconcerned with the lizards crawling around the counters.

“W-we um-”

“Howdy ma'am.” He stuck his hand out, not once looking at the armadillo the lady held. “The name’s Rhysand, this here’s my lovely wife Feyre. We got caught in the snow and were hoping you might be able to spare a room for the two of us?”

“Of course! I hope you two don’t mind cacti too much. Any concerns? You know what, doesn’t matter. I’ll grab a key and show you two on up!”

“That’s perfect. Thank you, ma’am.”

Not even thirty minutes later they had gotten a room and were getting ready for bed. Or, Rhys was getting ready for bed.

“Rhysand, you know I love animals. I adore animals. I do not, however, adore snakes. Or any desert dwelling creatures. They're gross, and dusty, and out to get you. Remember that Christmas in Australia? Boiling hot and everything was trying to kill us.”

“But darling, that’s Australia.”

“That’s irrelevant!” She huffed. “My point is, I want to celebrate our first christmas in this life somewhere other than an Inn filled with wild animals.”

He grabbed her hands, stopping her pacing and making her meet his gaze. “We will. I promise.”

Sure enough, the storm had passed by the time they woke in the morning. They were up and at’em in a hurry, Rhys’ compass taking them to the next town over in time for a holiday spent indoors, together, and most importantly away from wild animals.

***

“I think I still have that compass, somehow. I remember finding it again in an antique shop in that area a few lives ago, then I tucked it away for safekeeping - and the future. Sort of like you do with our rings.”

At the mere mention, Feyre brought hers up to the light. It glimmered beneath the street lamps, scratched and nicked from centuries of wear. Some people may have been bothered if their wedding rings had been so damaged, but Feyre just saw it as lives well lived and loved.

She shrugged. “So that may not have been my favorite, but it wasn’t the worst. In hindsight, it was a more entertaining year, so I can’t hate it.”

Rhys’ shit-eating grin dimmed, shade by shade. “I know which one was my least favorite.”

It was Feyre’s too.

They both sobered and held one another a little bit closer.

***

In all of their lifetimes, through dozens of centuries, it was the longest they had been apart; the loneliest they had ever been, too.

War had a tendency to do that.

In this particular life Feyre had been teaching art classes at an elementary school, biding her time while waiting for something. Someone. There was a pain in her heart amplified by a holiday season spent alone. It felt like every day the rain would just fall and fall and fall, unbroken by sunshine or snow. Even ice would have been welcome - anything to cut through the long, unending shadows.

She sat in a late night diner, avoiding returning to an empty apartment while sipping burnt coffee over a half-finished portrait of a man with raven hair and violet eyes. Something familiar, someone unknown. Behind the counter a server switched the radio to a news channel broadcasting the latest updates from overseas.

Had she known that her next life would be so much fuller, she might not have been so hopeless. Had she known that, a lifetime from then, memories would come rushing back and the stranger in her painting would not be so strange, she might have been less disturbed by the sheer number of renditions she had made of the same man.

Alas, she did not know these things. She didn’t even know the cruel twist of the universe - the war? - taking from her the man she didn’t know she waited for. And so for many many more nights she sat in silence with a tepid, burnt coffee (she preferred hot chocolate) and endless half-finished portraits, always hoping for the rain to stop.

***

Children rushed past them, dodging around holiday shoppers and festival booths with shocking agility. Silence hung between them like a clock’s pendulum at its peak, ready to come falling down at any second.

He squeezed her hand. “It made our next-first-meeting even better, I would say.”

Sparkling lights of all different colors turned to smudges in the background as Feyre focused her gaze on Rhys; on his violet eyes. Some things about him had changed, especially after the war, but his eyes stayed the same. The way he smiled with his entire being remained the same. Reliable. Constant.

“I think I would have to agree.”

***

With time their memories would fade. They would begin again, growing into new lives and apart from each other, but they were inevitably always nudged back together. And each time, they remembered one another a bit more easily.

So when Rhys settled in after the war and his new neighbor felt like home, all he needed was a light push in the right direction.

That day in particular had been windy and icy. Roads were closed, businesses were shut down, students were off of school. The universe handed Rhys an excuse to seek out his neighbor on a silver platter: the power went out, and Rhys knew his apartment was the only one with a classic wood-burning fireplace.

She answered after only the first knock.

“I have hot chocolate at my apartment and a working fireplace - if you need. Hot water too.”

Her gaze was soft, and she didn’t hesitate before agreeing.

They kept that year simple, soft, easy. It’s what they needed - something comforting. She stayed even many hours after the power had gone back on and the world had returned to operating in full-swing. They fell into easy company as years long since passed came rushing back, and a new promise was made to never be separated for that long.

***

They still had yet to break their promises.

“I thought that was very domestic, even for you.” Feyre grinned, exchanging a few coins for a small cone of roasted chestnuts.. “But I wonder if maybe we’d earned it. So many different adventures and lifetimes… maybe it’s good that we finally have the time for things like hot chocolate and wood fires. And roasted chestnuts.”

His lips turned up, the creases around his eyes softened. “Maybe you’re right.”

When it inevitably grew too cold outside and even their shared scarf and intertwined hands weren’t enough to keep them warm, the couple navigated through the crowded streets towards their shared townhouse.

Cozy, small, but most importantly - theirs.

He took her jacket, she put away his hat. He put the kettle on, she got their mugs and measured out the tea. They moved fluidly together, silently; familiar over so many different lives spent together. It wasn’t until they had settled in together on the couch, warmed pumpkin beside steaming tea on the coffee table, that Feyre spoke again.

“I still don’t know which of our holidays is my favorite. Maybe I don’t have one.”

Rhys reached out to tuck a lock of her hair behind one ear, cupping her face with the movement. “My favorite one is the one with you.”

“That’s most of them - I don’t think that counts as any single one, as romantic as it is.” She placed a kiss on his cheek. “But you sure are a sweet talker.”

“Then it’s this one, right here, right now, with you. When we can finally have forever.”

***

In every one of their meetings and partings, Rhys and Feyre fell together into one single life. Whether it grew from eye contact across a supermarket, a quick handshake in a business meeting, or simply bumping shoulders on a crowded sidewalk, and no matter how it ended, there was another life waiting for them. Homes to be lived in and loved, holidays to be spent bundled up together in a bubble outside of time.

It was the general consensus between the two of them: The best lives were the ones spent together.

#secret santa 2023 #acotar gift exchange #feysand

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ask-the-suite · 4 months

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> Hello! I am BOS. I'm sure you're wondering why you are recieving this broadcast. Well, I have been tasked by my group leader to inform you all that we are opening communications!

> Here is a list of us, to help any unfamiliar:

US (She/Her)

[Undefined Serenity]

Group Leader

TFS (He/Him)

[Three Flaming Spires]

Lead Researcher

SUS (He/They)

[Seven Undying Souls]

Maintenance Iterator

BOS (They/Them)

[Bright of Silhouette]

Comms Manager

> I will be delegating all incoming messages and sending out responses. And I will do my best not to accidentally peek in on sent broadcasts! Feel free to ask anything of us. I look forward to meeting you!

Rules vv

Hello! This is Void (@luci-datum), OOC to talk about some rules and base concepts.

First off - my canon is a little messy. Here are a few TWs that you can expect going into the lore or experiencing the story:

- Depictions of trauma, mental illness, abuse and manipulation

- Body horror/Mutilation

- Iterator experimentation

- Animal cruelty/experimentation

- Death

- Dark themes

The story is chronological, and you will be able to tell where we are off the pfp of this page. If you are unsure of what I mean by this, don't worry it will be cleared up later. That does however mean that some characters may become unavailable to speak with, however momentarily. I will do my best to keep things flowing smoothly, however.

RULES:

1) Please specify who you are asking. If you do not specify, I will choose one for you. I may also include other interactions with characters as well. Idk i find that fun

2) I will not answer asks that are NSFW.

3) Please try not to break asks into multiple posts.

4) No magic posts (IE: "I want to turn x into an animal"), but you can give characters items.

Rules may be added or changed.

5) IF YOU ARE AWARE OF THE STORY, please do not spoiler it for others. There are other characters that are brought up and added later, though these are exclusively animals and companions at the given moment.

6) I will not answer asks regarding your own OCs. I do not know them, and I do not have the capacity to remember every single one.

Non-Ask Posts

Sometimes, and especially if the story is reaching a critical moment, I will post things without asks being involved. These will be tagged as such.

Tags

#funny for silly goofy fun

#serious for serious posts

#tw for potentially triggering posts (see tw list at the top of the break)

#lore for lore and worldbuilding

#serene for US posts

#spires for TFS posts

#souls for SUS posts

#bright for BOS posts

#ooc for out of character, update or admin posts

#mod ask for asking me uwu

#fanart for fanart

#mod art for reblogs of art by me

Please be kind, respectful, and have fun!

FAQ goes here if I need to add it

Not giving personalities here is purposeful, I would like people to meet them as if it was in character. Just a silly preference I suppose.

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seawing-vibes · 5 months

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HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYPONY ! ! Here’s some art summary thangs <3 ! Template is by Mintcokev on DeviantArt !! I did one of full pieces and one of Sillay Doodles

Explanations of every piece & stuff is below read the readmore ! + links to the full work if its posed online !

First Template:

January -> This Sora Piece ! I am honestly still super proud of how it turned out , it was fun to work on and looking at it still gives me that nice vibe I was in while drawing it

February -> This headshot of my OC Elk! I developed and expanded on her story this year and did some headshots for their TH, still super proud of how the shading came out here ,,

March -> lmao nothin , not sure what happened in March but I dont have anything there aside from sillay Doodles

April -> This design of Blaze! One of my fav designs I’ve done recently .. shes just so sillay To Me

May -> This piece of my friend and I’s cat ocs ! Stickpaw & Frostclaw, two silly fellas <3 something possessed me here I’ve never drawn a kibby this well since and Im still super proud of this

June -> This reference of my oc Dee!!!! ITS DEE ! ! EVERYONE SAY HI TO DEE <3 ! ! ! ! ! I was so happy to finally give her a proper ref , shes one of my favorite ocs of all time and this came out so well , it looks so much like her!!!!

July -> This artfight attack! This piece was honestly just a blast to work on, the background and frame design and expression were all fun to illustrate

August -> These refs of my lomp ocs! Lomps are fictional guys made by my good friend and August was just the Month for them. These guys are (bottom to top) Fizz, Roe, and Skipper! They’re . Normal <3

September -> This piece of my fursona Kenny ! ! Just a fun piece to work on again, the colors came together way better than I thought they would

October -> This piece of my oc Houndcall! They’re feeling normal about their leader being possessed! This was like a weird experimental painted piece and ou .. I really loved working on it I wanna do more things with that method

November -> Not posed online! Surprisingly, this is a wip of a self-portrait I’m doing for class! Fathead Minnows and Rainbow Trout !! This canvas is massive (taller than me ,, which aint much but still!!) and I’ve been cracking at it for a while but hammered out the details of the trout in November so! It’s acrylic but I really wish I could’ve done oil instead .. acrylic dont blend well

December -> The final fella ! My idiot son ! Also not posed online , this is a linocut printed on hand-made paper! Fun fact, I make my own paper and my own Lino cuts as my main medium, I just cant afford the proper transfer ink, but I got some from school to use so ! My idiot dragon linocut son was born ! I hate him because he wont print proper but this piece ended up working out. Its lino-ink on handmade paper with red micron pen over it

Second Template:

January -> DNA Helicase

February -> Valentine’s Day Gift <3 !

March -> Not (publicly) posted online doodle of my epic oc Anton Bayheart giving his grandson a thumbs up :)

April -> Not (publicly) posted doodles of my ocs Sebastian (left) and Dee (right) (you saw her ref earlier <33) having a normal convo !

May -> A shot from This video of my friends ocs … the one depicted is Quickpaw <3

June -> Not posted doodle of Breezewhipser giving Rippletooth some good advice (it was not good advice) (ripple just learns hes aro)

July -> Not (publicly) posed doodle of my Oc’s Garret (BALD) and Benny (TIRED) . Also just two normal guys (they’re divorced) (and obsessed with eachother)

August -> This doodle of my ocs Savi & Skipper (Skip’s ref is in August first template <3) . Music taste

September -> a small part of this cat sketch page ! Beetlekit getting bullied by his cousins

October -> This doodle of Skipper . I appreciate him

November -> I dont know where this came from actually. Its my friends oc’s Redstone and Bumblebuzz staring kitty-like at my oc Specklestep (she is married to Red and Bumble is their daughter)

December -> Doodle of Tide from this whiteboard ! !

Have a great new year everyone ! ! ! Thanks for reading through all that if you did lmao

#Its new years in Germany so uh . hiiii ! ! ! happy ‘24 !!! thank you to everyone whos been fallowing me despite the lack of art !! ! im #super greatful to have met and interacted with so many amazing artists and people through this account ! ! ! !! hope everyone has a lovely #new year ! !#HAPPY YEAR OF THE DRAGON RAHHHHH #tideart

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cthulhuswaifu · 1 year

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dudes i started watching trigun stampede and having seen like half of the og trigun I have many thoughts!!!

unfortunately i am Bad at articulating my thoughts so I will try to list a couple:

The animation feels like what the og show was supposed to feel, yknow??? like the crusty 90s animation was a huge reason I decided to tap out halfway through bc it feels like they wanted a lot of movement but due to budget or just technological limits they weren't able to and it just looked. not good sometimes. I'm not trying to bash the animation and I'm also not an animator so i have no real idea of what the original production was like or what limits they may or may not have had. However! Putting studio orange on the job was a fuckin stroke of genius bc they know their 3d. and what with the frenetic energy the show should have had, the freedom that 3d animation allows for camera movement and whatnot is what the story deserved. Vash's bugs-bunny style character movements look so much more convincing and energetic (listen i love the of ep 1 crab walk too it was delightfully animated but i think the 3d lets them fully encapsulate that scrambling, frantic energy he carries in action scenes). once again i am not an animator and i have not outlined this at all and I'm absolutely not trying to be some credited critic i am just a Guy.

Subpoint!! the depiction of violence/death/destruction works way better. Once again I'm not going to go after the animators for not having the time/budget/whatever to give the violence and death in the story the weight they should have had. However, it is way more convincing and striking and works better with the tone etc etc i put this in after writing the next two points and my root-beer-fueled sugar high is starting to fade rip

I do miss milly, shes a delight, but i think replacing her character with a more jaded and serious one was the right move for this remake. already the tone is diving into the darker themes of the story and having someone like roberto be the voice of reason between him and Meryl matches the tone of the show better than having the more lighthearted dynamic milly and Meryl had in the original. The original took f o r e v e r to touch on the darker themes of vash's backstory and the overall tone was absolutely more on the quirky, comedic side. This worked well for the dynamic-duo-insurance-girls thing but stampede changing both milly's character AND their careers works way better for what the show is going for. like. if meryl and Roberto were still insurance agents trying to keep a handle on vash, that comedic value would have been totally undermined and had to have been scrapped after episode 3. The tonal dissonace would have been too strong and would have totally killed the mood. Milly is still my girl tho i love her with all my being

I do prefer the slower worldbuilding of the original. I understand with the focus on vash's relationship with his brother instead of the story the original focused on means we need more context for his character and the world the characters live in. But i liked vash being a mystery to both the characters and the watchers! it felt cool to see this goofball of a dude just. let down the facade and make us want to wonder who this guy really is, yknow? but again! as i have said many times! stampede is focused on the darkness in vash's story and the world of trigun so it makes total sense that they introduce vash as a tragic character first! and i love it! i love me a good dark story and instead of the "silly dude with a dark backstory who changes tone at the drop of a hat" character the "guy who has seen some shit and still tries to do good and be kind and funny in spite of it" character just works better there.

Anyway as previously stated i am kind of flagging so ill stop there and I'm sure ill have more thoughts later because I just cant be normal about these things

I think both versions have their merits and drawbacks and I'm not trying to say one is objectively better than the other (even if I do prefer stampede bc I'm a hoe for good animation and dark storytelling) so please do not kill me

i wrote this mess instead of studying for midterms pray 4 me

#long post #what can be generously described as media analysis #trigun stampede #i am also a big dummy and my brain is fried from school and school-related stuff so like if I said anything stupid uh #sorry lol

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how-tarotble · 4 months

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hi, cvtyvvitch on tumblr :) wondering if I could please have guidance on if I have any glaring blindspots in my life right now, relative to my highest path. current life plans are to travel to a specific country in the spring, keep practicing music, etc, but I worry I am missing something I cannot see. thank you, and if you’re interested I also read cards if you’d like a reading in return!

So this one took a couple of days for me to get done. I originally used my Hieronymus Bosch deck, which works a little bit differently than your average tarot deck. I did that reading when I was tired, and so when I woke up, I did the same reading using my Tarot of The Divine (the one I normally use when doing readings on Tumblr) and combining both readings, I think I have everything I need. I didn’t find anything too damning, so no life-ruining events as far as I can tell but there were certain things that I did take notice of. Reading 1: The shadow card is the Baron of Skates, a troublemaker, which makes sense with your desire to know if there’s anything you might be missing. The card I pulled to represent your highest path is the Kings of The East, and the ones that I pulled to represent blind spots are the King of Birds and Knight of Berries. The supplementary oracle card that I pulled was The Elements.

Throughout the cards (minus The Elements) there are depictions of birds. The King of Birds is one, one of the Kings of the East carries a golden bird statue, and the Knight of Berries has birds balancing on top of them. Hell, it could even be argued that the Baron of Skates is a type of bird. In the Hieronymus Bosch deck, the suit of birds represents travel (we’ll come back to this) and the element of air. The Elements being pulled alongside these cards tells me that the elements represented are something that needs to be paid attention to.

Reading 2:

Our shadow card this time is the Ace of Cups. The card that represents your highest path is the Page of Swords, and the ones that represent blind spots are the Six of Swords (Reversed) and The Empress (Reversed). The oracle card is Stage of Play.

I find it interesting that the Ace of Cups and Page of Swords both reference new beginnings. The King of Birds, too, represents purification and cleansing in a sense. It gets even more interesting when we reach the Six of Swords (Reversed) where one of the key terms is canceled travel. You mentioned traveling to another country, so I find this to be particularly relevant. I can’t say for sure that your travel will be canceled, but it could suggest that your plans may be interrupted. Now, the Knight of Berries and The Empress (Reversed), I feel, are communicating similar things. The Knight of Berries represents a person who is more talented than they realize, and the Empress (Reversed) is a card I associate with things like artists block, and it also represents anxiety and insecurity. Stage of Play (a card that also depicts birds and flying bugs) is a positive, lighthearted card which leads me to believe that everything will ultimately be alright. Conclusion: Both of these readings had a lot to say and they worked very well together, but there are three major takeaways from them: 1. You may encounter difficulties with traveling and this could be due to no fault of your own.

2. Regardless, a new beginning in a new country could be incredibly beneficial for you. Going outside and getting a little silly (according to The Elements and Stage of Play respectively) can help to refresh you.

3. In regards to your music or any other project, you may be more talented than you think. Appreciating what you can do now will go a long way in improving your quality of life.

That was ten cards I had to interpret, so there was a lot here. Wasn’t anything too bad, so I don’t necessarily think you have anything huge to worry about (maybe unless your travel plans get canceled, idk.) I could go for a free reading, I’d just need to figure out what I want it to be about, thank you.

#divination #free tarot reading #tarot #tarot community #tarot reading #tarotblr #tarot reader

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multi-lefaiye · 1 year

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MUTUALS POWERPOINT NIGHT: MULTI EDITION

HELLO gamers! it is i, tumblr user xavier multi-lefaiye, here to present my very good powerpoint to y'all. i am posting this early because i like being early <3

as some of you may know, i had a few other ideas for powerpoints, one of which i finished before going "hm i wanna do something else" and doing something else.

as i am sure you are all very well-aware by this point, my biggest fixation is tales from the gas station. so i decided to do my powerpoint about that instead of explaining in-depth how i'd rewrite every episode of notable bad horror tv series lost tapes. you're welcome <3

tagging the participants real quick (if i forgot you i prommy i am just forgetful and it was not intentional, ilsym): @wherearetheplants @nicola-writes @cnnamonrolls @abouttogetshellshocked @approximately20eggs @yourlocal-lichen @astralrunic

anyway! my slides will be under the cut, but if you'd rather see the actual presentation, here's the google slides link: [link]

comments are enabled but no one is obligated to leave any for any reason! i mainly enabled them because i may send this to some discord folks later who enjoy leaving silly comments.

anyway let's gooooo

[Transcript:

TALES FROM THE GAS STATION: A BRIEF SUMMARY

OR: an explanation of my blorbos

by tumblr user multi-lefaiye

/ End Transcript]

[Transcript:

what the fuck is this series?

Tales From the Gas Station started as a creepypasta series on the NoSleep subreddit

Then it kinda blew up and became popular enough that the creator reworked and rewrote the series to make them into books

There are four books total and also a seven-part comic series in the works!

Essentially, this is a horror-comedy series centering around a character named Jack Townsend, the minimum-wage employee of a shitty gas station at the edge of an even shittier small town, which also happens to be the epicenter of many supernatural happenings

/ End Transcript]

[Transcript:

DISCLAIMER

I haven’t finished reading the full series yet because [redacted] redacted] [redacted]

But regardless I’m MOSTLY basing this presentation on book one to avoid spoiling later events for people who wanna check this out themselves :)

This is not an exhaustive presentation unfortunately.

Look at this raccoon

/ End Transcript]

[Image Description: An image of a raccoon behind the wheel of a car, positioned as though it's driving. End ID.]

[Transcript:

Content warnings!!

So I’m not gonna go into the triggering stuff in this presentation, but if you wanna check out TFTGS yourself I wanna give a heads up where I can.

I also will try to give context to things where I can if I feel that it’s needed, but yeah point is I want to make sure anyone who checks this out knows what they’re getting into.

Anyway full list of warnings on the next slide let’s go

/ End Transcript]

[Transcript:

Okay here are the actual content warnings

There are a few side/minor characters who are really blatantly racist and xenophobic b/c TFTGS does not shy away from the fact that it takes place in a small, shitty southern US town--these characters are condemned by the narrative and clearly The Assholes but still, tread lightly.

Casual ableism, especially towards Jack, including the use of the r-slur (once again also condemned by the narrative but still)

Lots and lots of violence and murder

Suicide

Lots of talk of terminal illness

Drug use

Cults

Psychiatric abuse

SOME graphic depictions of blood n’ gore n’ corpses, but the gore is never the focus thankfully

/ End Transcript]

[Transcript:

CHARACTERS!!!

FULL DISCLAIMER: THIS IS ALL PRETTY MUCH MY INTERPRETATIONS OF THE CHARACTERS. Many of them don't have much in the way of physical descriptions and these are all just my personal designs for the characters :) Yay

/ End Transcript]

[Transcript:

JACK TOWNSEND

The universe’s favorite punching bag

He’s got that autistic tboy swag and I love him so so much

Chronically ill since he was in high school

Just fucking vibing

Frequently gets insulted and beaten down and it stresses me out but he gets less and less chill about it as the series goes on. I think he deserves to throw rocks at people

I relate to him a lot and idk what that says about me <3

Blorbo <3333

/ End Transcript]

[Image Description: A picrew of Jack Townsend from Tales From the Gas Station, a tired young white man with dark bags under his eyes, a small beard, and shaggy black hair. He looks worried and is wearing a blue shirt under a black hoodie. End ID.]

[Transcript:

ANTONIO / TONY

So I’m not quite sure how to talk about him without spoiling a bunch of shit

Ah well

One of Jack’s coworkers and his best friend in volume 1!

Kind of a sweet, anxious guy who’s just trying his best

What’s a little accidental murder between besties??? It was an accident, it’s fine.

King of being a really good and trustworthy guy with nothing else going on

I love him genuinely

/ End Transcript]

[Image Description: A picrew of Antonio from Tales From the Gas Station, a young Latino man with tan skin, curly brown hair, multiple piercings in his ears, and a beard. He has his mouth open as though he's speaking, and he wears a blue collared shirt under a denim jacket. End ID.]

[Transcript:

JERRY PASCAL

Jack’s emotional support human and bestie

Kind of like a puppy, except that puppy does a lot of illegal shit and kills people

Former member of a murderous cult called Mathmetism

Referred to as Marlboro for most of the first book b/c Jack doesn’t know his name

Big stupid energy but also the smartest bitch in the room. Depends on what would be funnier

Would fight god in the parking lot

If he’s being serious, something is wrong

/ End Transcript]

[Image Description: A picrew of Jerry Pascal from Tales From the Gas Station, a white man with shaggy blond hair, a small beard, and multiple piercings in his ears. He has a wide smirk on his face and wears a yellow t-shirt with a graphic of the sun across the front under a red hoodie jacket, and one hand is visibly holding a cigarette. End ID.]

[Transcript:

SPENCER MIDDLETON

MY POOR LITTLE MEOW MEOW

Too sexy and evil for gender

My design for him is very far from canon and I am aware of that. However I think everyone should draw him as a long-haired prettyboy <3

He’s just so babygirl <3

I hate him and love him in equal measure

God let him live another day and that’s everyone else’s problem

Anyway I just think he’s neat and should do more crimes

/ End Transcript]

[Image Description: A picrew of Spencer Middleton from Tales From the Gas Station, a white man with long ginger hair, a light beard, and pierced ears. He has a sharp grin on his face, showing his sharp teeth, and is wearing all black. End ID.]

[Transcript:

AMELIA O'BRIEN

Cop (unfortunate)

I have very mixed feelings about her as a character ngl and most of them tie back to her being a cop

I do think she’s interesting though

Wish she’d cool it with the casual ableism though <3 Like I know it’s not just her but goddamn

Anyway I guess she counts as a #girlboss

One time one of my friends compared her to the gay cop in Onward and I can’t stop thinking about it because God So True

/ End Transcript]

[Image Description: A picrew of Amelia O'Brien, a Black woman with dark hair pulled back into a bun and pierced ears. She has a stern expression on her face and wears a light shirt under a dark vest and brown jacket, with one hand holding a cigarette. End ID.]

[Transcript:

ROSA VASQUEZ

Sweetest girl in the world

Technically doesn’t show up until volume 2 but I love her so much so I’m talking about her here

Newest hire at the gas station and completely unprepared for The Horrors

She adapts pretty quickly though

Has a really huge really obvious crush on Jack and tbh I think it’s cute

Unfortunately he is oblivious

Besides that though she’s a very fun character and makes me very happy :)

/ End Transcript]

[Image Description: A picrew of Rosa Vasquez from Tales From the Gas Station, a young Latina woman with brown skin, dark brown hair that hangs loosely around her shoulders, and pink earrings. She has a wide smile on her face and is wearing a pink shirt under a dark denim jacket, with one hand held up in a peace sign. End ID.]

[Transcript:

SABINE

We don’t need to talk about her

So we’re not going to talk about her

You have to read volume 2 to get this backstory

/ End Transcript]

[Image Description: A picrew of Sabine from Tales From the Gas Station, a young woman with lightly tanned skin, pierced ears, curly brown hair, and freckles. Her mouth is open slightly and she wears a black choker, a black t-shirt with a skull on it, and a red jacket. Two of her hands are held up and her pointer fingers are pressed together. End ID.]

[Transcript:

MISC. CHARACTERS I'M NOT MAKING PICREWS OF

Kieffer - the world’s most killable man! A local politician and, arguably, part of the reason everything goes to shit.

Benjamin - a monster hunter who’s convinced that there’s something evil in the gas station. And he’s gonna kill it.

Vanessa Riggin - another employee at the gas station who unfortunately disappears during volume 1.

Brother Riley - local bookstore owner and ray of sunshine! Got basically excommunicated for teaching kids to read

Dr. V - psychiatric abuse: the character! (Jack’s psychiatrist who doesn’t seem particularly interested in actually helping him)

Deputy Tom - cop (unfortunate), but also Jack’s kinda father figure.

Agents Brick Roscoe - idk how to even get into this so I simply will not.

/ End Transcript]

[Transcript:

PLOT!!!

/ End Transcript]

[Image Description: Two edited memes featuring raccoons. One shows a raccoon facing the camera, with a photoshopped human hand holding a gun pointing at the viewer. The other shows a raccoon in front of a sunset and looking to the left, with a faded image of a screaming raccoon behind it. The second meme reads: "Physically pained, Mentally drained" / End ID.]

[Transcript:

Volume 1 Premise

The premise of volume 1 centers quite a bit around Kieffer, a local politician.

Picture this: your best friend pulls you aside at work and asks you about the guy who just came into the store. After you explain who the guy is, your friend says, “No, that can’t be him. I killed him last night. His body is in my trunk.”

That’s the day Jack is having.

A wild series of events follows, made worse when Jack starts documenting his experiences in a blog to keep himself sane

People start going missing! Other people start dying! Kieffer especially starts dying!

Jack is not being paid enough to deal with any of this!

/ End Transcript]

[Transcript:

Other things about volume 1 I wanna say, minus context

I think Spencer Middleton is babygirl material and I will not be silenced b/c I am so right

There is a genuinely really clever bit of writing in volume 1 centering around Jack’s leg injury but I don’t know how to explain it without spoilers so just know I think it’s really cool

The Bathroom Cowboy is a cool dude and I think I would like to be his best friend

I think Jack should be allowed to have a nice day for once in his fucking life

Rita the raccoon is a girlboss

The Man in the Raincoat is so gender

Agents Brick Roscoe confuse and frighten me. They’re also really funny

/ End Transcript]

[Transcript:

Here's a quote from volume 1 that I think captures the style of comedy well

She walked up to the counter and smiled and asked, "What do you think?"

What a great question. I think a lot of things, actually. I ran through a shortlist of answers. I think people spend too much time mowing their lawns. I think Marlboro's probably dead, and I may be somewhat responsible. I think no man ever steps in the same river twice. I think that, in terms of reality, perception outweighs actuality in every case, but if I were to say something like that in this town I'd get my ass kicked for being a pretentious dick. I think Tony was too hard on 'Temple of Doom.' I think every magazine is a scam. (Why should I pay for a magazine when it's already full of advertisements?) I think forcing children to recite the pledge of allegiance is creepy, and hot dogs are not sandwiches (they are, in fact, American tacos). I think things at the gas station are getting worse and I can't explain why.

/ End Transcript]

[Transcript:

by viewing this presentation you promise that if you ever read tftgs you have to tell me (tumblr user multi-lefaiye) all of your thoughts about it

/ End Transcript]

[Transcript:

i’m kidding, you don’t have to, i just wanna talk about this series with people

/ End Transcript]

[Transcript:

Thanks

/ End Transcript]

[Image Description: A picture of a raccoon sitting up and with its forepaws together, its teeth bared in a way that makes it looks like it's grinning evilly. End ID.]

#multi makes text posts #mutuals powerpoint night #god i love this fucking series #mutuals tag #typing up the transcripts took a while but it was worth it #tales from the gas station #anyway if you want to understand me. read tftgs.

18 notes · View notes

bucketnewt · 9 months

Text

losing my fucking shit!!!! i fear i may hyperfixate on good omens for atleast a month now what the fuck man!!! SPOILERS FOR GOOD OMENS SEASON 2 BELOW (really just general thoughts because i need tofucking write this down right now)

----

i have never vocally expressed my dismay at a season ending before until that fucking thing i haven't had such a strong and primal urge to draw two men kissing i want to fucking maul someone right now i swear to god i will KILL

if good omens season 3 doesn't end up happening i will be off the shits!!! or just a bit bummed out

i genuinely love crowley and aziraphale's dynamic oh so much and i just want them to kiss and make up and hold hands and live happily ever after but no!! the gays have been winning too much this year!!! we don't get this one!!!!

but also i really just love the universe in general it's so fun and cool and epic. i adore this take on heaven/hell and christian lore shit

AND ALSO ALSO I REALLY WASN'T EXPECTING ACTUAL ROMANCE BETWEEN THEM???

i thought it was just gonna be silly haha they look like they're gay and in love but they're actually just besties

i probably am gonna draw the two because i know tumblr is on a good omens high right now, but if i do i really want to make sure i don't dull them down or cast the de-aging beam on them these bitches are old and they need to be depicted as such!!!!!

#i am off the shits right now!!#it's almost 1 am!!!!#i want to KILL #newt posting #good omens #good omens season 2 #good omens season 2 spoilers

3 notes · View notes

penguin--person · 9 months

Note

i didnt know u had a milgram oc !! or i forgor... 12 for the ask game!!

hehe i do!! i made her back in like, april or may, and then did Nothing with her... n because we weren't like, that big of friends back then i think? we were close but we weren't divorced yet i think, i didn't know if you'd think me cringe or not for making a milgram oc i think !! n msotly chatted to arc about her... but i should have known better. shes like. girl loser. anyway!! gonna respond to this under cut:3 im gonna do every prisoner. sorry not sorry also i do wanna say, aiko is very underdeveloped. so if any of these things clash. 1) sorry:( shes silly like that 2) shes a hypocrite, sorta 3) some of this will probs change as i (if i) develop her

12. What is their relationship like with the other prisoners? as stated above, i will do every priosoner:3

Sakurai Haruka this guy... this dude.... hes sure a guy!!! what a dude.... i think, they're similar enough for both of them to dislike one another. aiko doesn't like him because he reminds him of her, in a way. he didn't get well cared for by his mother in his youth (neglected) and, i'm not sure about which one(s), but he has disorders also i think? or mental illnesses? i don't know boss . i like mahiru and amane and i only know things about the two of them. and also yuno. bc she's easy to know about. and muu. and umm . kotoko . twirls hair . i don't know much about the men ❤️as in, i while i do care about thinking about them, i prefer the girls, because, the guys are boring, to me . oh you're mentally ill? so am i. oh you're on twitter? im not. oh you have a guilty concience? youre actually pretty cool shidou btut fanon has ruined you for me. oh you, are? ok. oh youre a terrible depiction of did? why does the fandom like you so much. men cannot win in milgram. theyre all so. simple. and so are the women, to be fair, but. you get it. you get it mikey. you get it. anyway, i think aiko would act civil around him, if he tried to talk to her, but wouldn't go out of her way to interact with him. sympathises, though. pre-trial one results probs avoids him. thinks of him as a lost puppy. post-trial one, pre trial-two results, maybe envies the 'bond' he has with mu. post trial two resuls, she umm. well. haruka says "oh you wont forgive mu? ok well ill just kill myself then. loser" and umm uh. thats not. good for aiko. that was her murder, basically. yea also he has "born a guy, treated like a girl because parents wanted a girl" while aiko has "born. a secret. treated like a guy because, parents. something something. trans but never confirmed if she was a canon character, just alluded to."

Kashiki Yuno yuno my good friend yuno.. i think aiko would get along ok with her. again, doesnt seek her out, but! likes her:) thinks shes silly. likes listening to her talk and indulging in conversation. pre trial 1 results, aiko is generally very closed off, but, later on deems yuno a comfortable presence:) and post trial 2 results starts seeking her out to hang out.. likes sitting with her in silence. helps her take care of mahiru after t1. and umm . yuno also takes care of her. unsure if yuno likes her, too, or if she finds her. lame

Kajiyama Fuuta does NOT like him does NOT like how loud he is!!! thinks he should quiet down. doesn't like how brash he is. she doesn't stop him from acting out (doesn't really.. dissapprove of it? doesn't like the ways with which he goes about things, but, doesn't mind that he overall tries to do them? admires him a bit, maybe. but does think hes stupid and dumb). tries to help him after t2, but he'd propably go "psh i dont need your help" and, well, she wouldn't want to push her luck. she's injured herself, after all.. . does care about him and worry for his safety, though.

Kusunoki Muu pre-t1 results, aiko is too out of it to be annoyed with muu. tries to help her a bit at first, maybe, sympathises with her - but soon finds her annoying and stops trying to help her. after t1 results, she wishes muu would act towards her like she does to haruka, but, she doesn't. and. she was voted guilty, so! thumbs down. doesnt like her:( but . goes along with her schemes n such i think. relates to her also.

Kirisaki Shidou - suicide tw for this one hooo boy ok. this one is a big one. due to the nature of aiko's murder, she gets close to this guy. sorta. doesn't like him. so! aiko's murder. its more explained in the link, but, basically, tried to kill herself and.. huh? what?? how is she in milgram if she killed herself?? well you see, basically, i consider the milgram prison more of a concept than an actual prison in its universe. so. milgram just popped her conciousness out from her last moments and into milgram. idk. ✌️the explanation is too long for this but! so. a bit into t1 - either between her and kotoko's trial or after his innocent verdict - she goes to shidou and basically asks him "am i dead? can you do a check up please?" and, i actually think shidou would take her semi-seriously - of course, he knows she's not dead, but, is propably like. just worried for her. he's been declared innocent at this point, anyways - might as well help. so he tells her, "no, youre not dead." and she gets pissed and angry and upset and sad and depressed and doesnt talk to him again until kotoko attacks her. disappointed bc, if hes right, she failed. and. angry because he Must be wrong. he Must be. or. it all sucks and is shit.

SHIINA MAHIRU 🧡💛💗 likes her positive outlook on this. aiko is very 'love-starved', and, although i think mahiru finds her a bit creepy at first, they both warm up to one another:) theyre buddies... injrued buddies... tries to take care of her after kotokos attack, but, being injured herself, she umm can't that much. but they spend time together. shes very "our unlovable guilty verdicts... could be lovable guilty verdicts", and, just, rlly likes that mahiru is so lovely. she's so warm and always has love to give. and. aiko needs that so bad. it Is unhealthy, yes, aiko becomes sorta very dependant on her for most of her emotional needs... sorta like muu and haruka, but, not rlly, because, yuno is there to tell them "hey youre getting a bit too codependent" n keep them in line lol maybe a bit of girl yuri.. who knows

Mukuhara Kazui (why are all the guys blue?) kazui is the closest thing aiko has ever had to a father/parental figure in a long time, but, she will Not let him know she will Not she will Not let him protect her from kotoko because that would mean unraveling feelings and shit. so. yeah. thats all i will say about this. because. i am unsure if thats the path i will take she does dislike him tho. because hes 'stereotypical strong man' n she envies that she cant be that. and, again, the dad thing.. she doesnt like it. that she feels like that

Momose Amane 💛 Thinks she's silly:) likes listening to her talk about her religion pre kotokos attack- after, too, but the others probs kee the two apart (bc, amanes "you cant use medicine" actually works on aiko). but. yeah. feels bad for the kid, and, wishes she was in a better mental state to help her. at least recognizes shes unable to. doesnt stop her from trying to help her with the little things - which, amane does not like. bc. she feels like shes being treated likea little kid.

aiko mae herself:)

Yuzuriha Kotoko finds her intimidating. admires her resolve. rlly doesn't mind her attack all that much.. is a bit scared of her, but, dismisses it as admiration n such. really does Not mind her attack.

#aikocore #suicide tw #milgram oc

0 notes

howdoesagrapewrites · 3 years

Text

All yours, Babooshka.

Tags: Yelena x fem!reader, soulmate!au, fluff with a bit of angts, historically completely incorrect, happy ending.

TW: depiction of war, brief mention of sex, homophobic slur a few times, suicide.

Synopsis: War is no place for loving, it never was, but maybe you could love her again in the 21 Century, i mean, only if you could stop feeling so overwhelmed by her only existence, but no matter what, you can't stop something that's meant to be.

Notes: one, i don't like the part 4, it just feels lazy to me, and two, i'm not a native, so please tell me if i made a mistake <3

Part one: When she was beautiful.

Yelena Armanovna, as strong as ten soldiers, the jewel of the battlefield, once was just a kid, her land was destroyed by the war, and as the only child of the house, she was forced to join the army, or else die there, she became a soldier, and she desired that the war wasn't real, that she hadn't being born into this world, that no one had.

Everyone knew that she didn't talk a lot, most of their fellow soldiers didn't even knew where she came from, or if she was even from Russia, the only one she talked to was a nurse, her name was y/n y/ln, and like Yelena, no one knew about her origin, the nurse was way more talkative than Yelena, but she was assigned to other areas, staying with older soldiers, child soldiers, or severely injured soldiers, she was called by the child soldiers "angel", because of her comforting aura in hard times like those.

These women wouldn't be able to meet eachother if it wasn't for the near-death experience Yelena faced one time. She got shot by a hidden enemy, fainted from the blood loss and was taken to the nursery right away, they couldn't afford to lose her. That's when you saw the look in her eyes, that look, and you knew that death was upon the jewel of the battlefield, and you knew that if she died, everyone else will die, you tried as hard as you could to stay cool during the surgery, but you were breaking, because of all the hope that was layed on her shoulders, she was the hope of everyone else in that place to return home someday, even if Russia didn't won the war, her strenght will keep a few alive. So there you were, assisting the surgery of the one that could do something to keep everybody safe and triying to act like it didn't meant a thing. At the end, she survived, and with her, the dreams of returning to your home, you were the one assigned to take care of her, and you were going to make sure Yelena survived.

Part two: Uncanny how she remind her of her little lady.

—"¿Yelena Armanovna?" You asked to the blonde girl laying on the bed.

"Yes" she answered without taking her deep eyes out of the book.

You told her that it was your bed she was in, pointing at your last name on the post-it next to the bed, then showing her the same mark on the bed across the room where it said: "J. Armanovna".

"Ah, i hate when they misspeal it, it's Yelena with a "Y". Well, sorry, but this is the only bed i can sleep in, i'm kinda tall, you can use mine, i will give you a cookie for your kindness." She concluded with a little smile, you notices how her voice was way sweeter than you could think considering how menacing her looks were.

At the end you decided to let her keep the bed, thinking it wouldn't mean anything, how wrong you were, now you could look at her sleeping without moving from the bed, and you did it, you thought it was so creepy and you wanted to stop, but you couldn't, why? Why were you obsessed with the sight of her closed eyes and dry lips at night? Why did she gave you this insane feeling of comfort and loss at the same time? It was so uncanny.

No matter how weird It felt, you couldn't escape from Yelena, she was your roommate, and your classmate in some of your classes, on top of that, she was quite nice, a very smart lady with a pleasent personality, so you had no excuse to be mean or distant whenever she asked about your day, or started a small talk when the professor was late. Along with that sort-of friendship, you also knew Yelena's group; a beautiful girl with raven hair named Pieck, a blonde sarcastic man named Zeke, sometimes his brother Eren, and Hanji, a very excentric and funny person. These people were good friends to you, more than you expected, and that confirmed you: there was nothing wrong about Yelena, and you had no reason to be disturbed by her… Well, to be honest, there it was a little thing that made you upset, Pieck said that Yelena liked Zeke, again, you had no reason to be mad, but you were anyway. Why did you felt so attached to this lady? Why did you did what you did?

It was 2:00 am, you couldn't sleep and you were so ashamed of being doing what that thing, what thing? Writing a love letter, a love letter to Yelena, with a pseudonym, with the first word that popped into your head: "Babooshka". You put perfume on the paper, and you signed it under that name, a scented letter, when you were finished, you let the envelope under your bed, and let it on Yelena's locker.

Part three: How she was before the tears.

She woke up, feeling dazed and almost disappointed for being alive, when Yelena saw you, she recognized you for the stories of her colleagues, "Angel?" She guessed.

"Hello", you smiled and giggle a bit for that nickname, "My name is y/n y/ln, and i will take care of you until you are better"

"If i'm with you means i'm already dead, you only take care of the ones that are almost there." Yelena asserted with a careless attitude.

You wanted to protest, but it was meaningless, you wouldn't make her upset in her state, "May i ask how is your wound feeling? Are you in pain?" You kept that polite and sweet smile on your face.

You kept taking care of Yelena, she healed way too soon, her body wanted to stay alive, but you couldn't say the same thing about her. You got to meet the real jewel of the battlefield, she told you her story, and you told her yours, you two knew everything about eachother, likes, dislikes, and sad pasts. You noticed how Yelena cried softly whenever she thought about her life before, her life before the tears, before the war, when she felt happy. And you also noticed that you could erase that tears, the touch between your soft hands and her ser face, was something magical, something that nobody could understand in that moment, but you two? You knew everything about it, about that love touch, those secret beautiful instants you shared.

You were the one crying when Yelena got better, you were joyful for her recovery, but you knew that she had to go, and after that, you were going to lose her forever, or so you thought. "We can send eachother letters, and we can meet at night." She reassured you while you were laying on her chest, skin to skin, she kissed your forehead and caressed your cheeks with her strong and graceful hands, you purred at her cuddled your body in hers, you liked to kiss her scars, she had so many, it showed how determined she was on the battle and you liked that, the eyes and body of a soldier, and the heart of a suave lover, Yelena was always elegant, her movements could been rough and beastily, but she was soft and neat, whether i'll be fighting, talking, or embracing you. You could say with pride that only you knew this side of Yelena Armanovna, the subtle dominance she always established on her manner mixed with the chivalry and dulcet, that made the blonde woman truly enticing and amusing to anyone with enough luck to discover it.

You knew that your letters to Yelena couldn't be too suspicious, so you took advantage of the fact that no one knew a thing about her, "Babooshka", was the pseudonym you choose, because everyone was going to think that it was from Yelena's grandmother.

Your first letter to her, was this one:

"My dearest Yelena, even though i promised that i wouldn't miss you too much, you have been away for three days and i'm already feeling the lack of your touch, and missing your dark eyes that make me shiver every time. I always thought that i would die without having loved, but you prove me wrong, i love you, i love every part of you, if i could picture perfection, it would be you, your laugh, your hair, the way you talk about home, everything about you would fit the word "perfect".

I swear to God and every star on the sky, that someday i will marry you, someday i will call you my wife, and you will be fully mine, and i will be fully yours. I know that you may think i'm silly because of this wish, but i know in my guts that i will become your wife, no matter how many years or Centuries i have to wait to do it.

All yours, Babooshka."

When Yelena read the letter, she felt nothing but joy, she couldn't use words to describe how in love she was with everyone of your words, and giggled at the idea of marriage, of course she would marry you, she would marry you all the times that she could, she will make you hers every time, and she would submit herself to you every time.

The two lovers kept sending and receiving love letters, and meeting at the comfort and hacen of the night, with only starts and the moon herself as a witness, sharing the intimacy of loving, not always touching two bodies, but the touch of two souls, two tormented souls who found love in a hopeless place.

It has been almost a year since the letters and secret meetings started to happen, Yelena and y/n couldn't be more in love, but tragedy was upon them. A soldier named Floch, started to notice the letters, and one day, he intercepted one, the love words were obviously not from Yelena's grandmother, and with fear of the jewel of the battlefield getting courted by a man who could get her pregnant and useless, this soldier tried to trace the letters, he spend days getting up triying to catch the mailman, and when he did it, he noticed that there wasn't an adress, so it must have been another soldier. After waiting for the guilty one to put the letter on the mail box, he saw y/n y/ln, the nurse, the angel, being a witness of how Satán corrupted the two women into a sapphic relationship, he ran into his superior's arms, showing him the evidence and warning him that given the nature of the letters, he may be grossed out by the devil's pervertion in the two women.

The superior gave orders of keeping Armanovna here, and taking the nurse away, into a convertion field.

Yelena was lucky to hear it, and she ran the fastest that she could into the critical patients nursery, where Y/N was. "Babooshka", she whispered at your ear while grabbing your arm yo take you away, you followed her into the woods. "What happened?" You asked with confution, you saw the look of pure fear un Yelena's eyes.

"They are going to tear us apart, they are are going to take you away, they will torture you there", she was ay the edge of crying, and so did you.

"What can we do?" You couldn't think anything, you were all feelings

"Die, that's our only option, if we run away they will find anyway." The tall one tried to stay calm, failing

"You can't die, you mean hope for everyone!" Your conscience was heavy, you couldn't let Yelena die for you

"Y/n… You are the love of my life, if they take you away, i will kill myself anyway, i can't live without you, i can't just survive anymore, i need to live, when i'm with you i'm alive." Yelena wrapped you in a hug and you felt the tears falling on her face.

At the end, you agreed, Yelena already had a little bottle hidden in her uniform, you both took sips until the bottle was empty, and you kissed and felt eachother like never before, because it was the last time, those were your last hours of life. You passed away after two hours, you were sleeping in Yelena's arms, while she was singing a lullaby from her hometown.

She started with a cracked voice; "I know i do not have silver or gold like many others,

but i promise that i will wrap my bride in silk" she stopped to cry a little.

"and i will love her with such depht,

that all my lacks she will forget,

and she will love until the end… "

Yelena cried louder, and before falling asleep, and looked at your corpse with adoration.

I'm all yours, Babooshka.

Part four: Babooshka

She woke up, ready for the exams, dressed with her usual suit, and put a lucky charm on her pocket.

She was getting to class when she remembered, "my lucky pen is in my locker", so she went to get it, and saw a letter that fell sloppylly on her perfectly organized locker. She looked at the envelope and read "Babooshka", It clearly wasn't from her grandmother, one, because she would have written in "the tongue of mother Russia", two, because she was a bitter old woman that didn't write her, never, not even on her birthday, and three, because it was on her locker, not the mailbox. She opened it go find a love letter that has essence of a known perfume, she received the letter with a strange delight, smelling it and making a place on her locker for the piece of paper.

These letters came one by one every week, and she knew they were from y/n, but Yelena couldn't help to love the letters, and she wanted to keep collecting more and more.

She decided to shoot her shot after two months, when you two were studying together, she kissed your lips out of nowhere, leaving you completely confused and flustered.

"I- i thought you liked Zeke…"

"Oh, i did" Yelena acted so shamelessly "But then you came."

"Do you say that a lot?" You asked annoying trying to shield from your notorious blush

"No, just you, Babooshka. I don't know why, but you make me fee… alive? I feel so close to you since i saw you."

You didn't know what to do, you felt the same way, and you were way too nervous to think a witty reprise.

"Why did you choose the pseudonym Babooshka?" Yelena have been wanting to ask you for a long time.

"For real? I don't know, it just, familiar? I guess"

"Ok, then" she smiled and pulled you closer

"I'm all yours, Babooshka."

#yelena headcanons #yelena #yelena aot #yelena x reader #yelena snk #yelena supremacy #yelena fanfic #aot fanfiction #babooshka #Babooshka songfic

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nutty1005 · 4 years

Text

How “The Untamed” reversed its fate, Xiao Zhan went the hard way in his depiction of Wei Wuxian

Original Article: https://www.weibo.com/ttarticle/p/show?id=2309404476523863212216#_0 Original Author: 乍暖已寒 (Published by: 爱战DAYTOY_1005)

(TN: The Untamed was based off the novel “Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation” or “Mo Dao Zu Shi / 魔道祖师”. Bringing this novel to the silver screen had its fair share of troubles and many did not look kindly at this project in 2018, nor believed that it would fair well in China.)

I have said this before – when a new top celebrity with stunning good looks appears onto the scene, immediately accompanying it will be forceful criticisms of his/her acting. Xiao Zhan, who burst into fame because of The Untamed, is no exception to this as well.

Endless negative articles, out-of-context screen snaps with negative captions (e.g. the first 3 episodes where he had to act as Mo Xuanyu, a lunatic), slowed down GIFs, or even insinuating special effects… they really tried their best to smear his acting.

Just this once though, Xiao Zhan prevailed despite all of these. The endless waves of well-prepared negative articles did not prevent Xiao Zhan’s acting chops from appearing on Weibo’s trending topics (instead of his appearance). His unforeseen, exceptional performance in The Untamed proved them wrong – such a great refute to their efforts!

Xiao Zhan’s Exceptional Moments

He had multiple different ways in handling his crying scenes, and they were all able to invoke a lot empathy in his audiences. There were tears of helplessness, tears of doubt, tears of pain, tears of false bravado, tears like that of a lost child – and every teardrop touched his audiences’ hearts.

This scene was my personal favorite – it was as painful as it was beautiful. Besides grief and hopelessness, you could also sense Wei Wuxian’s helplessness, and it became extra heartbreaking. Yes, many would always forget that beneath the all powerful Yiling Patriarch, he was merely a teenage boy, and he had just lost his home.

Besides his crying scenes, Xiao Zhan also had similar delicacy and accuracy in managing the character’s psychology – for example, the scene which Wei Wuxian discovers the method to transfer the Golden Core. At the moment of discovery, he was filled with exultation, but the joy in his eyes slowly dimmed down, ending with relief. There was this sliver of sadness amidst the jubilation but it was quietly set aside.

Xiao Zhan used his “eyes acting” to great effect, and performed the series of complex emotions perfectly – from the discovery of a cure, to understanding that someone has to sacrifice his Golden Core, to deciding that he would be this person. This made the audiences want to ask, “What about you? What is going to happen to you?”

I also admired Xiao Zhan’s attention to details in the scene where Wei Wuxian brings Jiang Cheng and Jiang Yanli to Yiling Supervisory Hold – he was like a helpless prey trapped at a dead end.

Wei Wuxian was just an child when his family perished, and he had just went through another massacre – there was simply too much death and bloodshed. He was high strung and any bit of provocation could make him lose his rationality. He was instinctively biting his teeth and shaking as he forced himself to protect his only remaining kin.

In fact, after leaving behind the first 10 episodes of happy-go-lucky, Xiao Zhan had countless exceptional moments such as these. I could not even finish describing 10% of them in this long article of mine. For someone who was the lead actor for the first time, his future is really filled with endless possibilities.

As such, I could not even fathom why someone would blindly mock Xiao Zhan’s acting, even more so than when someone mocks his appearance. For someone who could weep while script reading with his fellow actors, how could he be someone with “zero acting chops”?

“Empathic” Style of Performance

The most apt words I can use to describe Xiao Zhan’s acting are “graceful” and “touching” – there appears to be no discourse to his acting, but yet his acting draws empathy and his characterization extremely believable.

To an actor, this is a solution, but this is one of the dumbest method as this is also one of the most harmful method. This is because this method requires the actor to breakdown his personality and restructure himself to suit his character. It makes entering and exiting the role extra difficult – every teardrop is created from the actor’s blood and soul.

To me, I am an extremely sensitive viewer and I like the acting to be natural; I cannot accept any bit of deliberation. I do not like it when performance leaves a trace of the techniques used, instead this “dumb” method is what that can touch me – to become one with the character.

This is probably why this silly child could weep like this during script reading. He might really be a natural born actor, but also a gentle angel – what kind of soul resides in him? How is he able to empathize entirely with Wei Wuxian such that he could tear up like this? Who would not love this boy, who is naturally extraordinary, but yet also incredibly compassionate?

He Understands Wei Wuxian

And because he understood the true meaning behind “becoming Wei Wuxian”, so he understood him even in the smallest details.

Have you ever wondered how Wei Wuxian was like beneath the manically cool Yiling Patriarch and suave youngster?

Firstly, he was an insecure person.

Below is from the author’s Weibo:

His childhood as a stray set the tone for him as person who is always filled with uncertainties – he will subconsciously attempt to change his facade in order to please his loved ones.

And it is evident that Xiao Zhan understands this – you can see that Wei Wuxian has a different facade when dealing with different people. To Jiang Cheng, he is his best buddy; To Nie Huaisang, he tries to be the friend who leads him astray; To Jiang Yanli, he is unashamedly a child begging for praises; To Madam Jiang, he is the most proper and obedient student.

In fact, this scene of an obedient Wei Wuxian gave me more affirmation that Xiao Zhan knows Wei Wuxian, more than any of his crying scenes. (Madam Jiang appeared, and he was the first person who stood up, in apprehension.)

Secondly, he puts up a false front.

Before the broadcast of the drama, Xiao Zhan gave an interview which caused displeasure among part of the novel fans. He said “Too many crying scenes, Wei Wuxian cried too much.” Some of these agitated fans expressed that Wei Wuxian was actually a cheerful happy-go-lucky person, he does not like to cry – he only cried twice in the books, Xiao Zhan must not understand his character!

However, is that really so? Evidently not. The novel was written from Wei Wuxian’s angle, therefore the story was told to us by Wei Wuxian, and hence we are actually reading his version of the story.

When you think about it, how is it possible for Wei Wuxian to not be devastated at the massacre of Jiang Family, the death of his brother-in-law due to his misstep, the death of Jiang Yanli, who took the sword on his behalf, or his own death, where he despaired and allowed himself to be devoured by ghosts? It is definitely not possible, but why were these not described in the books? Because, Wei Wuxian, who liked to put on a false front, decided to sidestep these in his own version.

Yes, our Wei Wuxian was the sort of person who only spoke of the good, but never the bad. No matter how much trauma he suffered physically or mentally, he kept smiling and kept his false front. He always looked like nothing mattered to him and he never suffered.

Hence, when he was battered and wounded by the demonic dog in the drama, despite being covered in wounds, after he took a bite of the bun he got from Jiang Cheng, he smiled brilliantly and said “delicious”. This part made me cry for him – I felt so much for this stubborn child.

Below is why, I was sure from the beginning that Xiao Zhan would do a good portrayal of Wei Wuxian. He told Wei Wuxian at the end of The Untamed shooting to “cherish yourself more, stop putting on a false front”.

He really knew him. He really felt for him.

He came from a boyband, he had no professional acting training, he did not even have much experience in acting, but he lived up to Wei Wuxian.

In the End

Finally I wanted to say, analyzing anyone’s acting using static pictures, GIFs or even short video clips, without script or character context, are all biased analysis. True performance is not pieced together by short clips, but by complete characterization. As such, perhaps my article may just be as truthful as those gossip articles online. You are welcomed to watch The Untamed in order to truly understand how Xiao Zhan did.

#xiao zhan #sean xiao #xiaozhan #肖战

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sagemoderocklee · 3 years

Photo

2020 has been a weird fucking year, to put it mildly. There have been a lot of ups and downs, and with New Year’s Eve and the start of 2021 upon us, focusing on the ~positive~ seemed like a better way to end the year, and hopefully start 2021 feeling inspired and proud for overcoming this horrendous year.

For many people, it was difficult--even impossible--to get anything done this year (myself included), and that’s okay! But if you were able to make progress on writing projects, even if it was just one or even if it was just part of one, you should celebrate that! I wish I’d thought of this sooner and organized it better, but regardless I wanted to celebrate my own accomplishments with regards to my writing, and encourage others to do the same! I was going to tag people, but I’m not sure with it being 2 hours til midnight for me if that would feel like putting too much pressure on others, so if you want to do this too please do!

This wrap up is honestly just a self-indulgent look back on the works I’ve made and what I learned/gained from each, maybe what I don’t like about them, some totaling on what I did, and some resolutions for the next year. It’s silly, but I think it’s kinda fun and if you missed any of the things I have posted this year, you’ll find them here!

2020 Fic Wrap Up:

Kado: Parts II+III (COMPLETED)

Kado was started in September of 2019 for the @puregaalee summer event. This was a last minute thing that I started the day the prompt was due and managed to write the first part in about 6 hours while sitting in a cafe--remember that? Sitting in cafes? Man, I miss that. I hadn’t anticipated working on Kado, but I decided that I was going to finish it this year, and I’m honestly amazed that I did. This fic is sweet and fun, and surprisingly popular, though it isn’t my favorite of my works. However, it is a light, fluffy little romcom modern AU, and I learned a lot with it because despite my struggles with modern AUs and their horrible lack of political intrigue, this fic forced me to work within set parameters. I was only writing a 3 part story, and each part could only be 9 scenes long. For those unfamiliar, kado is another term for Ikebana, and in Ikebana there are specific elements to follow. Certain styles will only use three branches, some will use nine. So my goal was for the structural elements of the fic to mimic Ikebana. In doing this, I was able to do something I don’t usually do, which is keep this story more concise.

I’m still not sure how I personally feel about the ending, but I think endings are always a struggle, especially with something like this.

Gate of Dreaming (COMPLETED)

This is a fic that I started last year, then left to sit untouched with only 2k words. Getting back into it was a bit difficult because I was writing something very different from my usual: stream of consciousness. This fic was very experimental for me not only because of the stream of consciousness, but also because of the changing tenses. This was another exercise--unexpected though it was--in brevity. With this particular story, it couldn’t be dragged on and on, because--despite the 100 year time span--the events take place within the Infinite Tsukuyomi. This was also the first time I’d worked from Lee’s PoV in quite some time, so that was fun because I do enjoy writing him, but usually write from Gaara’s PoV. This is definitely one of my favorites from this year, and since it had been sitting on the back burner for so long, I’m so excited that I could finally get it done.

Another one where the ending really wasn’t easy to achieve, but I did end up liking it more than I expected, and I think the best thing is that it’s open-ended which leaves room for others to guess at what the future holds.

It Eats Your Heart (WIP)

This was an unexpected fic for me in every way imaginable. Starting another fic? Making another modern AU? Tackling the horror genre? None of those were things I’d planned to do this year, but lo and behold, that’s just what I did. I really enjoy a good bit of horror, but it is NOT an easy genre to work within, and this fic has definitely been a push for me. But with it being such a push, the payoff is far more. Stepping out of my comfort zone is something I like doing, but I think this is the biggest step outside of that and I am so incredibly proud of how that first chapter turned out because of it. I was really able to surprise myself with this fic, and I am hoping to update the next chapter early on in the year.

Absolution (WIP)

This fic is probably the second oldest idea/longest unpublished fic I currently have up. Formerly a much longer title, the idea for this fic came to me in May of 2017 when a friend, @brianadoesotherjunk / @brianadoesart, posted a piece of GaaLee fanart that sparked inspiration. The fic took off, morphed into something much bigger than the one scene depicted by the art, and now 3 years later, the first part is up. Initially, this was meant to be a long shot, but after sitting with this for so long, I realized that I needed to split it up into 9 parts, which allowed me to use this for GaaLee bingo and finally publish it. Much of the first part was already written before this year, but I’d been quite stuck on it until now. This is actually probably one of my favorite GaaLee concepts to date. I remember back in the day, there weren’t a lot of different takes on getting Lee to Suna so he and Gaara could fall in love, so (at the risk of sounding cocky) I think that Lee as a nanny is rather inspired. I think with this fic, I pushed myself the hardest to get past the hurdle of writer’s block and accepted that publishing is probably the best way to motivate myself to keep going. The feedback for this fic has been really motivating, so I think I’m probably right about that.

I do think there are some parts in the middle or towards the end that could maybe use some tightening up, but I’m just happy to finally have this fic out in the world.

The Art of Love: Chapter 11 (WIP)

TAoL is such a ridiculous labor of love. The chapters for this fic are novellas in and of themselves, so each time I update it takes a lot of work to get them out. This fic is one of those like magnum opus type fics. I have put so much into it, and I’m honestly amazed that it’s only been up for 3 years because I’m approaching the halfway mark on it, and I don’t think I expected to be there by now. Despite being able to churn out 30k chapters, I have a hard time focusing on one thing and I often struggle with mental health related writer’s block, so big works are always sort of sporadic in their updates.

This particular update of TAoL was definitely one of my favorites though. Initially, I didn’t plan to go the sort of dark fantasy rout that I did with Shikamaru, but I actually really love what I’ve done with him, though I worry others won’t be as into it or that the execution isn’t quite there. One thing I would like to work on with future chapters of TAoL, however, is maybe pairing things down a bit--though I’m not sure that’ll always be possible. The next chapter is a Naruto PoV chapter, though, so I expect that one to be a MUCH shorter chapter than the last three and should be able to get it out sometime next year.

Before I could publish this chapter, however, I did go through and make some big changes, which is something I often struggle with because of such long breaks in between working on certain projects. I will say, though, that TAoL continues to push me to greater heights as a writer, and I look forward to actually finishing this fic someday.

Thirteen Strokes: 1 + 2 (WIP)

Another unexpected fic this year, however, this one was actually an idea for about a year, unlike IEYH. This fic has really given me a lot of perspective on my own writing and world building, and has inspired me to sit down and really start committing the things I’ve developed to paper to create a cohesive view of Suna, Wind, and the shinobi world. This fic is meant to be a Romance. Like just full on Romance. I write a lot of tragedy and focus on a lot of darker themes in my writing, so while I don’t think of this as stepping outside of my comfort zone, it is very different from my usual, and a really nice change of pace. I think, in all honesty, it is one of my best works, and I do hope I can continue to deliver on the remaining 11 parts of this story.

if this were the last i felt you breathing (COMPLETED)

Ugh. This fic has been my enemy for 2 long years. I signed up for a Secret Santa exchange, and of course, I regretted doing it when I found that I was not motivated and, after the month of October where I was churning out fic after fic for GaaLee Bingo, that I was massively burned out. I wasn’t able to think past writer’s block, and so I ended up settling on dusting off an old, unfinished piece for my giftee, and I hope they can forgive me for not coming up with something brand new for them.

This fic was a struggle. Working so closely with the canon--following the Rescue Kazekage Arc as closely as I did for this fic--made this a much bigger challenge and this fic sat and sat and sat for two years, untouched and incomplete. I’m still not sure how I feel about it. I know it’s not my best work, but I am glad that this fic isn’t hanging over my head and that I was able to deliver something to my secret santa giftee.

My goal with this fic was to rewrite this particular arc from Lee’s PoV to give more depth to the arc and shift the emotional core of it away from Naruto. Naruto as a character has a lot of flaws that never get addressed, and one of the things that is consistently frustrating for me is the way the emotional core of the series rests on him in unrealistic and often superficial ways. Naruto hasn’t spoken to Gaara in three years, but I’m supposed to believe he’s this affected by Gaara’s kidnapping? Temari and Kankuro are right there! Lee is right there! I wanted to see that, so that’s what I set out to do, and ultimately I don’t think I fully succeeded, but I tried. I guess not everything can be a resounding success

---

This year I managed to do a lot more than I realized. New works, updates, and COMPLETED pieces?! I never would have thought, but staying home gave me more free time, and when I was too broke to work on costumes, writing fanfiction was something free I could do.

Total new works: 5 Total updates: 9 Total completed works: 3 Total words this year: 143,587

---

I have a lot of goals for the coming year, and I know I won’t make all of them, but that won’t stop me from trying.

2021 Writing Resolutions:

Reach 1million words (+238,073 words)

Finish IEYH

Finish Pearl-Filled Lungs

Update TAoL (Chapter 12 and 13)

Update Absolution

Update 13S

Update Find Me (Chapter 6)

Start the Ballad of the Dragon and the Phoenix

Start editing Alliance

Return to working on Honor Bound

Return to working on We Need Not Be Yellow Tulips

#naruto fanfiction #gaalee #naruto #shippuden #gaara #rock lee #fanfiction 2020 wrap up #fanfic year in review

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fictionalquacker · 3 years

Note

FictionalQuacker: "Hello welcome to UchihaBucks what can I get you?"

Spell: *Looks up from phone* "I’m sorry what?"

FictionalQuacker: "YOU HEARD ME!"

(As long as you make yourself laugh eh? 😂)

May I have a number 8, and a number 3 please ❤️

One venti Sasuke-latté with oat milk and a vegan Mangekyou Meringue comin’ up!

(the grammar is very incorrect because this is dictated but I hope it’s ok!)

8. What is a scene you wrote that you are most proud of?

(copied off an earlier ask) :)

It's hard to say that I'm proud of it but my absolute favourite scene is the fight/argument between Sasuke and Fugaku in chapter 4 of the pride of the Uchiha. that chapter is very long and by the time you reach that scene you're hopefully very immersed in the day it is depicting and the events that are going on during it.

I think I've edited that scene over 9 times by now and it probably looks quite different from how it did when I first posted it but the core of it is still the same. the reason I like it so much is because I really think it is a realistic family argument within the context that these characters live in and it is both quite intense and quite painful. a lot comes to the surface and Sasuke’s emotions sort of slowly escalates and changes as it goes on in a way that reflects how I felt while arguing with my own parents back when I was his age (19).

3. How do you know if your writing is “in character”?

I think it's very hard to know and it takes a lot of time to figure out - especially writing from somebody's point of view it's almost like I have to get to know the character through many experiences and scenes with them before I have any clue of what they will be like.

another thing I do a lot is rewatch and reread parts of Canon and pay extra close attention to the body language decision making and speech patterns to try and get a feel for what they are thinking and feeling.

but at the end of the day I think it's more important that the character is consistent within the fic than it is to be congruent with Canon. Being Canon compliant does make a good impression on many readers but it is also basically impossible to achieve it completely and I don't think it's worth worrying too much about. everything we do in fandom isn't Canon and that's the fun of it - to me it feels like we're all playing. that is that no matter how seriously we take fan creations (and this includes shipping) we are at the end of the day not so much trying to add on or affect the original piece of media so much as we are contributing our perspectives to the community that surrounds that piece of media that we all like. I know that the word “playing” might sound childish or silly but I mean it in terms of how playing involves using our imaginations to learn and explore as well as socialise and bond with others… and sometimes also push or challenge ourselves as well.

so in short even if I have methods of trying to make sure I write as close to Kishimoto’s “in character” as I can (because I am borrowing them to tell my story) I also have to embrace the fact that every character will inevitably end up being my current interpretation of them and rather than worry too much about how kishimoto did them I should focus on just doing them justice by including them in a good way 😊

Thank you for asking for the only RP i’ve done in years! <3 xD

#a & a #fanfic writer asks #ask games #mangekyou meringue does legit sound good tho i bet it'd be raspberry & blackberry flavored for the colors

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mrsgreenworld · 4 years

Text

Sen Çal Kapımı Episode 14 aka The 5 Stages of Grief

This week brought us another SCK episode which was in one word just good. I had a lot of problems with and while watching the previous episode last week. There were so many questions to editing and the overall pace. I am no expert but even to my untrained eye the episode this week was easier and more pleasant to watch. However, for all the things I liked (which I will get to very soon) after rewatching the episode with the subs I am also left a bit disappointed. But let's start on the positive note.

The things I loved / liked:

☑️ Edser: even with this inevitable doom over their heads they're gorgeous, aren't they?

I love the consistency of the way they hold hands - palm to palm, entwining their fingers; not sure if this is the writers' decision or it was Kerem and Hande's acting choice or it's completely unconscious - whatever, it gives me all the feelings;

loved the gifts exchange and the choice of the gifts was so Edser; I know that Serkan's gift wasn't the most original or symbolic but it actually showed how attentive and attuned to Eda he is; he notices what she likes; a small moment when Eda said that there's nowhere she could wear such a dress and Serkan just easily responded with something like "We will find somewhere to go so you can wear this dress" - made me swoon 🥰 ; and then Eda's gift to Serkan - simple, may even seem silly and not functional but it's so Eda; because just like that world lamp it carries a meaning, it makes us and most importantly - Serkan - smile and laugh;

the next very important Edser moment is at the office terrace when Eda was planting flower seeds; I am not sure I got it right (feel free to correct me if you are a Turkish native speaker and I got lost in translation 🙂) but I think Eda said those were rose seeds; even if those were the seeds of some other flowers it's still very symbolic because flowers in general represent natural beauty and something devine; of course each individual flower has its unique meaning which can also differ depending on the colour (take roses for one: ⚪ roses mean purity and holiness, 💛 symbolise wisdom and joy while ❤️ roses are the representation of passion and sacrifice); roses in general symbolise God at work, the scent of these flowers makes us think about powerful sweetness of love, which is the essence of God; I think love is the first thing that comes to mind when we think about or see roses; so if Eda was indeed planting the seeds of roses it's very fitting because, as Eda said it herself, that very place is where everything started, where her and Serkan's love story began; plus these flowers have a very special and personal value - they represent Eda's connection with and love for her mom;

I loved seeing Eda open up to Serkan about her family, tell him her real last name... although it was bittersweet because we know how this conversation only served to cut Serkan more from the inside;

and speaking of Serkan - oh my god, the way he was looking at her in this episode 😭 we have seen a lovesick smitten look on him before but it's different now; it's painful longing; it's almost like he was committing her to his memory, wanted to imprint her looking at him with smiles and love ; because he believes that he doesn't deserve any of it and once she knows the truth she will never look at him the same way ever again;

I loved a bit of light-hearted moment between Edser in Serkan's office when they discussed evening plans and Eda suggested going to the cinema; Serkan's reaction - 👀; our boy is so social phobic 🙈😆; I love how Eda is showing him and teaching him these simple joys of life which he, unfortunately, never experienced;

and the cinema date itself - perfect; Serkan Bolat actually eating popcorn? - the planet must have gone off its axes🤣🤣🤣 Serkan asking Eda to put her head on his shoulder - swoon; his small kiss on her head - double swoon; him noticing her crying and trying to wipe away her tears - triple swoon; and finally - after the film, when he said that he would love to have the kind of machine they had seen in the film, the one that could erase bad memories, and he would love that for her, to relieve Eda from the pain of her past - I officially turned into a puddle on the floor after this;

I absolutely loved that throughout the episode Eda was very much attuned to Serkan; she immediately noticed that something was off about him; however, she wasn't pushy, she gave him space and time, she was waiting for him to talk to her when he was ready; her noticing his injured hand within the first millisecond and not believing him when tried to make up something involving Sirius - her stern "Are you really gonna feed me this crap?" look was priceless and his immediate surrender was even better 😏;

comments about Serkan's magic hands gave me all kinds of dirty thoughts 🙈😆🤣

and finally - Eda kissing Serkan's neck; it may seem a bit bold because, I think, neck kisses are considered a more sensual kind of kisses but Eda made it not about passion and desire, she managed to turn it into a show of her deep love instead and also forgiveness for Serkan's earlier outburst;

☑️ 5 stages of grief:

Call it a coincidence but just this week, on Monday, I posted a fic featuring future Edser where I actually wrote Serkan going through these stages. Fifi mentioned them as well in the episode. And finally - we got to see Serkan at very stage in this episode. Of course in reality it doesn't go like this - in just one or two days. If only that were true. But we all understand that we're dealing with fiction here so the process had to be accelerated.

As Meredith Grey once said: "There are five stages of grief. They look different on all of us. But there are always five".

1 - denial: we witnessed Serkan's denial after seeing the documents that his parents showed him; even Aydan said something like this to Alptekin: "He's just found out about it, of course he's going to try and deny it";

the moment in Serkan's office when he said to Eda that they should run away, disappear, just the two of them - another attempt at denying, it's him trying to ignore this; the cinema date - a small fleeting moment of escape where they could be a normal couple enjoying a movie together, eating popcorn and cuddling;

2 - anger: the very first scene with Serkan and his parents when they came to check on him - he lost his temper and yelled at them demanding that they bring him the damn files because he needed to see everything with his own eyes; in that very scene he almost broke a coffee table but ended up smashing the world lamp that Eda got him; let's talk about symbolism here for a moment - Serkan's whole world is smashed into pieces right now, just like this lamp;

another small depiction of his anger - after his date with Eda he slammed his first into the poor coffee table and did break it cutting his hand in the process;

his passive-aggressive behaviour towards Efe and finally losing it and snapping at Eda;

3 - bargaining: the conversation with Eda at the terrace in the office and asking about letting go of the past and if she had ever considered forgiving her grandmother; him trying to talk to her - he even wanted to do this when they went to the cinema; him trying to make up for his shitty behaviour and coming to her house with flowers and every intention of telling her the truth;

4 - depression: there were small snippets of it - when he broke the coffee table and didn't even flinch; when he was sitting on the counter in the office and telling Engin everything; him walking out of his office after the terrace conversation - you can see the heartbreak written all over his face; him mentioning to Engin that this secret was eating at him and how Eda's kindness and goodness were killing him;

5 - acceptance: the first step I think was made during that fight when Serkan said to Eda that "loneliness is better for someone like him anyway" and then just walked away; in that moment he seemed resigned to this fate - of being forever alone; then of course overhearing Eda and Ceren's talk about Eda's grandmother; and finally - the breakup scene where Serkan was completely resigned, he had realised and accepted that there's no winning for him in this situation and in his mind he had chosen the lesser of two evils;

I believe that we will see a bit more of Serkan's resigned acceptance next week but in this episode I think we walked through all of the stages;

☑️ Engin: love what a great friend he is - he immediately noticed that something was bothering Serkan; he patiently listened to Serkan (also loved that Serkan shared this with Engin instead of keeping all of it to himself), genuinely empathized and said how both Serkan and Eda didn't deserve this shit; I also love that Engin urged Serkan to be honest and tell Eda everything and pointed out that Eda deserved to know the truth;

love how he doesn't let Serkan get away with anything, just like in that scene in Serkan's office - after Serkan's fight with Eda, in the evening Engin finds Serkan in his office and when Serkan says "don't say anything" Engin is like "sorry, bro, but I will" and he did tell him that it was a shitty thing to do - saying all those things to Eda; but he also managed to remain understanding and wasn't pressuring Serkan too much or yelling at him that he had acted as an a*hole;

also loved Engin's silent support to Eda after Serkan's outburst;

while I don't really care about Engin's romantic entanglements with Pırıl the moment during brunch when he basically shut Pırıl up by feeding her something was really funny 😆;

☑️ The Girls: loved the scene where Eda tells the girls that Serkan was going to Italy with her and how he had already bought a house and rented an office there; their genuine happiness for her and their support of each other never seizes to amaze me;

the scene in the evening with all of the girls lying in a circle and telling how their day had gone - another testament to how beautiful this female gang is;

☑️ a series of smaller moments:

Eda hanging a new picture of Serkan on the wall and drawing a ❤️ on it with a red💄- this girl is so in love 😏😁;

Eda / Selin ripping Selin's wedding dress together - a great bonding moment;

Melek showing Selin her support at the brunch;

Aydan tending to and dressing Serkan's hand and telling him her own love story - a nice mother/son moment;

Seyfi spotting Serkan's picture and the star certificate in Eda's room - his genuine happiness for Edser gives me life, he definitely is the captain of this ship 🚢💟🕺🤝💪😎 ;

I love the list of Serkan's friends: Engin (he's numero uno because he's Yoda Diggle 🙈😆), Pırıl and Sirius (btw, where the hell is Sirius??? Mom & Dad are fighting again, you better drag your ass over here so you and Seyfi can help them make up)

The things I didn't like / was annoyed with:

🚩Selin: I am not saying she has no right to be angry with Ferit; what he did wasn't nice but she was ready to dump him any moment and I am sure had Serkan whistled at her while she was at the wedding table, she would have run to him then and there; so I think she should get off her high horse and stop being so freaking selfish; she has to take responsibility for her own actions and instead of demanding something from Ferit (like leaving the holding, not coming to the Art Life office) try apologizing to the man for being a bitch of cosmic proportions;

the cutting of the pictures scene - way to go girl if that's your kind of therapy; but the moment when she stumbled upon some pictures of herself and Serkan and left them untouched - god, give me a break; still being hang up on the man who clearly doesn't love you and probably never loved you, the man who, as you claimed yourself, you were never happy with... I don't know but it wouldn't have hurt if the writers had made her love and respect herself a bit more;

what's with that face after having overheard the conversation between the girls in the restroom? she looked as if she had heard them bad-mouthing her while there had been nothing negative said about her and the focus of the conversation had been on Ceren and Ferit;

🚩Ceren and Ferit: the thing with them has been developing kinda unevenly; while I enjoyed their first meeting and running into each other at the office in the previous episode, in this episode there was too much of them and the tone of their scenes almost gave me a whiplash; Ceren's passive-aggressive behaviour over the phone and near the office was just weird, the brunch interactions - awkward at first and then everything ended with Ceren being all sweet and supportive 👀;

🚩while I liked the scene where Selin and Eda were ripping Selin's wedding dress together and didn't like how they ended the scene: when Eda saw the pictures of Selin and Serkan together; I know it's not pleasant to see the pictures of the man you love with his ex while at the said ex's house after having helped her rip her wedding dress... but it's not a good enough reason to turn hostile and cold; and while Eda was not hostile, the look she gave Selin made me think I had forgotten to close the window in the room 🥶;

🚩 Aydan: I know that her heart-felt story was meant to make her likeable but it actually made me understand her even less; for a woman who was in love, who fell in love with someone who wasn't from a wealthy family - and to give Eda so much crap how she was not the right fit for their family; of course that was something she said at the very beginning, in the first episodes but it still annoys me;

and that unspoken advice that she kinda sorta gave to Serkan - really??? what kind of advice is that??? maybe I got it wrong but did she actually advice her son to just carry this burden on his own? did she mean it was okay to disappear into thin air without so much as a goodbye???👀🙄🤯

🚩 Pırıl and Engin: while their bowling date was kinda cute I didn't like Engin's comment about him wanting to boast in front of his friends that he finally "got the girl" so to speak; and Pırıl's initial reaction to bowling was a bit extra;

🚩Efe: liked his new hairstyle, the man looked smoaking hot🔥but☝️he is becoming more and more shady; it's like he's doing nothing wrong, he's being polite and friendly, learning things about the staff and organising brunch but it seems like he's trying too hard and there's something behind of all this; also - I see what you did there with Ferit and all that shares talk, very subtle 🧐🕵️;

There was nothing I hated but there's something I was disappointed with:

💔 Serkan not telling Eda the truth; I understand the motives and we saw the struggle and how he came to this difficult decision through all those stages of grief; however, I feel disappointed that the writers decided to go down this beaten path; I think I had a tiny sliver of hope that they would surprise us so I was sorry to see this story becoming predictable like many others; this won't, however, stop me from loving these imperfect characters and this imperfect show; sorry not sorry but "Deli gibi aşık oldum" 😊😍

#sen çal kapımı #sen cal kapimi #sck #sck long post #sck episode 14 thoughts #edser #eda ve serkan #eda x serkan #eda yıldız #eda yildiz #serkan bolat

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