AAAAAH THIS TOOK SO LONG!!!!!!!!!! But it’s done!!!!!!!!! ngl I started thinking about my grandmas when I was painting Yumie n started tearing up a lil :’) 💚💙💚💙

AND ANOTHER TAG THING {warning: strong and possibly strange opinions, LONG ASS RAMBLES (which most definitely include strong and possibly strange opinions), frequent oversharing}

tagged by the lovely Angel <3

1. If you could go backward in time, what would you do first? #2008 Log- Don’t pretend to not be bothered by HC and co’s behaviour and actually call them out on their shit. Note to self: You don’t owe anyone anything. #2009-2014 Log- Start homeschooling earlier. Maybe actually tell people how you felt too? You might have gotten a diagnosis, and thus the treatment that has drastically improved your life, sooner and you’d probably have a lot less scars. Maybe none. And also might not be immune to the effect of regular painkillers. Also maybe then you’d be able to just get said painkillers from the cupboard where they used to be instead of having to ask your mother permission on whether you can have some- at age 22- and having to swallow them there to prove you’re not hoarding them for later (cause that’s right, you did that once, ya dumb little bastard). #2012-2013 Log aka You STILL don’t owe anyone anything- Also do not engage with HS AT ALL. Just nip that one right in the bud. Don’t even go there. PTSD ain’t fun. Also do not allow HC to worm their way back in later. PTSD still ain’t fun.  Though then you probably wouldn’t have written that one VIXX story and not only was writing that story enjoyable (sometimes???? ... maybe?????????), that story did also apparently help a lot of people too...so... maybe don’t fix yourself for the sake of those people who told you your writing helped them through a lot of their own shit. **Particularly never forget the one person who said they hadn’t cried themselves to sleep a night since finding your story. Taking that back from someone is not a nice idea.  LOTS OF SHIT THAT BASICALLY MEANS: stop trying to kill yourself, dumbass. people aren’t lying when they say things get better. well, somewhat. also don’t let people take advantage of and abuse you. or maybe do a bit. because your suffering has helped others and that’s all that really matters right? BUT JUST A BIT. definitely not all of it cause that was Shite. 

2. Conversely, if you could go forward in time, what would you want to see? Dumb men (I was going to say ‘straight, white, cis, American’ men but realised I’ve seen other types of men also being equally idiotic, SO I GUESS JUST MEN) being deleted from all youtube comments please. Also maybe shut down tumblr. I think we’d all benefit from that tbh. Also while I’m at it, can we have a game similar to Pokemon GO but instead of catching Pokemon you catch hot anime bishies. Get exercise and also get five thousand hot boyfriends :D Also retaining the nickname feature. Because that’ll be entertaining. 

3. What’s your favorite word and why? I’ve always been fond of kerfuffle. It just sounds so cute and happy. A kawaii way to say you fucked someone’s shit up. Petrichor is also a DAMN FINE word. It sounds satisfying and the meaning is EVEN MORE SATISFYING. 

4. Hot chocolate with milk or with water? Toppings? Marshmallows? It tastes better with milk, but as I at times have more than 3 a day (since I don’t drink coffee and need caffeine), if I plan to have more than 2 I will make them with water. I believe I have already stated my opinion on marshmallows as well lmao. 

5. If you could change one thing about your favorite fandom, what would it be? Tbh delete all appreciation for my absolute NOTP. And no, I don’t actually mean Akashi/Furihata like most other Akashi/Kuroko shippers; I occasionally state I don’t particularly care for that ship, but I tend to just ignore it and its existence for the most part. Whereas my actual ‘I FUCKING HATE THIS’ ship, NOPE I WANT THAT OBLITERATED> DELETE ITS EXISTENCE. WIPE IT CLEAN OFF THE FACE OF THE EARTH. This can also be said to apply to one particular person in said ‘FUCK NO’ NOTP. I have frequently expressed my disdain for this character, I do not make it a secret, so it should be no leap to assume who, and which ship, I’m talking about here. 

6. You now have the ability to permanently alter one character from any fandom. Who do you pick, and what do you change? -Lmao. Okay. Well, I’ll name some names after all then, shall I?  -Can I just. Completely erase Momoi’s existence from KnB entirely? Jfc I cannot fucking stand her one bit. The only redeeming quality of her very 2D, bland, and at times downright offensive character, is her desire for the GoM to be friends again. And I could live without that somewhat nice sentiment if it meant the remaining 99.9% of her shittiness was gone. I will never like her. -I can occasionally stand her in fanfiction if she does’t have a major appearance, and also if she’s not being monumentally annoying. And even then I don’t feel any issues with killing her off due to dislike of her canon characterisation. I could literally care less what happens to her. Harsh, maybe, but I personally feel she brings nothing of value to this series, and tbh it would be far better, and certainly less cringey, without her.  -I have essentially been awake for 3 days so this is probably said with much less delicacy than I would normally use, though regardless of insomnia-induced aggression levels, the base feeling is the same. 

7. What is your philosophy on life? (Is it pointless, is it meaningful, is it what you make it, etc…) I honestly don’t care about things such as ‘the meaning of life’. We’re never going to know who put us here, if anything did, or what we’re meant to do, if there is anything, or why we are here at all. Just do whatever you want. Everyone’s going to die and the sun will turn into a black hole and swallow the earth and the universe will ultimately end in a rather unpleasant manner anyway. As long as you’re not harming anyone’s way of life, do what ever you want I could care less.  (that got kinda dark... I guess that’s what happens when people ask philosophical questions)

8. Would you consider getting a tattoo? If you would, what would it be and where would you put it? -Well the first tattoo I ever planned on getting (decided upon when I was 15), and the one I still want to be my first, is my recently passed dog’s pawprint tattooed on my left wrist; where I used to frequently self harm. The original idea was to get a tattoo of something meaningful there that would remind me every time I went to hurt myself that there’s still reasons for living. I stopped self harming around the same time my dog died in 2015, and even though I didn’t really need the reminder to not hurt myself in that way, I decided that getting his pawprint (which I was given a print of when he passed) would be especially nice, and would serve as a reminder of things I survived, and should I ever need a reminder in the future. My plan is now to get his paw on my left wrist (where the majority of damage was done, as he was my first pet), and when my cat also passes (hopefully not for a while still), I will get her pawprint on my right wrist.  -In less meaningful directions, I’ve also wanted the Grey Warden’s emblem tattooed on me for the longest time. I’m thinking thigh in terms of placement. idek what it is about them, or about the DA series in general. I mean, being a Grey Warden is arguably (is it tho) kind of a shitty thing?? You don’t really want to aspire to that if you enjoy, idk, LIFE? But their tagline of ‘In war, Victory; In Peace, Vigilance; In Death, Sacrifice’ IDK BUT IT JUST GOT ME.

9. What’s your favorite headcanon? (Could be your own or someone else’s) Shit, I have A LOT. *These are all mine as well! (mostly lol) -One that I’m still fond of is the hc that Kuroko becomes sleepy after eating a lot (particularly sugary things) which is one reason he eats quite lightly, and that the GoM during Teikou would always be attempting to overfeed him because they thought it was adorable when he curled up in their laps and went to sleep.  -Another I came up with is Akashi not being allowed to play videogames (and probably also not watch much TV) after his mother died. Thus, the GoM (and later Rakuzan regulars, YES YOU TOO MAYU WITH UR LOVE LIVE RHYTHM GAMES) would bring in their DSs and PSPs to school to let him play them as a much needed break from all the pressure being put on him.  -Ideas conceived with 6ubblegum earlier such as Masaomi actually having an unrequited interest in Kuroko’s dad when they were younger, and obviously him becoming quite upset when Kuroko’s dad married Kuroko’s mother. We also came up with the idea that Masaomi and Shiori’s marriage was arranged by their parents for mutual family benefits and that the pair never cared much for each other, and also that Shiori was aro (also I angstily suggested ‘imagine her crying under her veil as she walked down the aisle tho’). Then I also suggested the idea of what if Shiori and Kuroko’s mother were friends, going on playdates with their sons (and also the humorous idea of them putting baby Akashi+Kuroko in matching dresses). So in the end, Masaomi has never been much interested in his own son, and the only person who cared about Akashi truly was his mother, who is now gone. Also Masaomi becoming understandably VERY opposed when Akashi begins dating Kuroko in school.  -Anything involving mentally ill GoM + others (though a chunk of these aren’t even headcanons and more: I am 100% convinced these characters actually have these conditions). Especially fond of self-harmer Akashi.  -Also literally any hc where any particular character is either aro, ace, or both. I reeaaaally love ace Kise actually.  -AGENDER REO!!!!! -I’ll end it with a somewhat nsfw one. The shameless guilty pleasure with 6ubble of Kise and Kuroko being known as the sluts of the Teikou. They’ve definitely boned all the regulars (including NIji) at least once. Probably more. definitely more

10. Do humans have souls? Do animals? I’ve been awake far too long for these kinds of questions XD UHHH in my personal belief I’ve always maintained the idea that all living creatures (this includes humans, as humans are primates) have a sort of.. living energy?? My belief is that once a creature dies, of its lifeforce/energy/soul/the magic keeping it alive/whatever you fancy calling it, the personality part (which I would say comes from the brain and is made up of memories and of course the individual’s unique personality) goes to a plane with other deceased energies (suppose you could call this heaven of a sort - tbh I always pictured it as kinda like the pyreflies in FFX), while the rest of the energy (which I would say comes from the heart and is, I guess, the emotions the individual has experienced through life) is recycled and returned to the earth to be used again. SOOO a sort of somewhat logical theory that combines both afterlife and reincarnation. I also think that the recycled energies can recognise other energies they knew in previous lives. Not in a literal sense, but more like, they might feel an inexplicable connection, be it between two people, a pet and a human, etc etc. I kinda like the idea of this also explaining real life cases of supposed ‘soulmates’. Two energies meeting that once knew each other and were compatible in a previous life (sounds really YA romance I know). This could also be potentially used to explain some conditions or mental illnesses. Recycled energy that previously had lots of negative experiences may be renewed as someone who is also troubled (blame ur disorders on your energy ancestors lmao). This could explain troubled people who have no family history of any similar experiences. IT ALL SOUNDS VERY FANTASTICAL BUT YE. This has all come together after years of viewing and researching many different spiritual beliefs and recounts of spiritual or other ‘incredible’ events, in an attempt to kind of merge everything into something that could potentially be real and/or believable. Idk if scientifically this would make any sense, but I feel it’s logical enough to suit me anyways. 

11. What’s your favorite holiday and why? Well I have mentioned I’m pagan before, sooooo, my answer to this will probably be weird? XD LONG AND BORING BACKSTORY TIME: I didn’t really become self identified as pagan until the age of 13-14, and before that I grew up typically celebrating Christian holidays (Easter, Christmas) despite my immediate family not being religious at all. I always saw these holidays as more just time to be with family than anything else. So I do still celebrate Easter and Christmas as I’ve grown up with them in a culture that celebrates them whether you’re religious or not. I guess Christmas was always my favourite? It’s roughly a month after my birthday, far enough that I get double presents, but close enough that there’s still lots of ongoing excitement. And growing up it was typically the only time each side of my family would all be together (we’d alternate, one year at my mum’s parents, the next at my dad’s). But as I’ve gotten older, and grandparents have died and families have drifted apart, I’ve become less interested in both Easter and Christmas, seeing them now more as just times to buy stuff for people when you really can’t afford to, and tbh now I find myself more drawn to things such as Samhain (also ref that if you have seen spn, they butchered the pronunciation. it’s more akin to ‘sah-ween’ it’s an Irish word I think, which explains everything tbh) in particular. Before last year I had never sought out other pagans in my area and thus was a bit lax in my celebration of sabbats, so when I actually started meeting up with other people in my city early last year, it actually really changed things for me (so emotional sobsob). The Samhain I celebrated with this group earlier in the year (as I’m in the southern hemisphere, Samhain for me is in May) was actually a really really special thing that I did. It also happened to coincide around the 2 year anniversary of my dog’s death, and as Samhain (which has become modern Halloween to most) is a day for celebrating loved ones who have died, it was just a really nice experience to think about my dog, as well as my grandmother who died 3 months before him.  THAT WAS A LONG, BORING, AND MUSHY WAY OF SAYING THAT BASICALLY: ‘pagan Halloween’ (tho that term doesn’t even make sense lmao) is actually really lovely and memorable compared to almost every other ‘traditional’ holiday of my life. 

Geez you just happened to ask all The Big Questions. And you literally went from 100 to 0 to 100 and then probably to 1000. Or maybe that was just me. I AM VERY TIRED AFTER VOMITING ALL THAT OUT. also my finger joints hurt. 

WELL, if you got all through that, here are my own questions, which I totally Did Not steal from other question memes already in existence. I’m definitely not lazy. No I’m actually just very tired lol. These are all going to be fandomy/OTPy questions because WE REALLY NEED SOME LIGHT CONTENT AFTER ALL THAT. Plus everyone loves talking about their fandoms and shit. 

1. A pairing you initially didn’t consider but someone changed your mind? 2. What’s the longest you’ve ever been in a fandom? What fandom was it? 3. Your favourite fandom {for the people, not the thing you spazz over}? 4. Are there any fandom popular ships that you don’t like or just don’t get? Alternatively, are there any typically overlooked minor ships that you think are really underappreciated?  (hay this one i made up myself lol) 5. What was the first thing you ever contributed to a fandom? 6. What’s a popular romantic/sexual ship that you can only ever see as a brotp? (also me!) 7. If you had the chance to make your OTP canon, and your NOTP very clearly stated as ‘definitely not canon eVER’, how would you express this in your ‘new canon’? (i’m on a roll) 8. Which character is Daddy Material? (there’s always at least one, admit it) 9. Character you relate to and why? (please share all tragic similarities) 10. As either a reader, writer, or both!, what’s your favourite fanfic genre and/or tropes? Are there any you always stay away from? 11. Opinions on omegaverse (in any and all forms, ranging from early spn fics, to the surprising amount of BTS/kpop fics, or have you tried the Japanese manga take on omegaverse - or even.... Life From the Ashes)? 

Tagging: @6ubble-gum AGAIN LOL cause these are new questions and I want to see your answers | @the-chibi-sempai | @justsimplyl | @humanitys-shortest-soldier | @kelandry5 | @seijuurouus | @sugaless-coffee bro r u still alive | @kagabutt bcuz we still need to talk moar |

Tagged by @branch-chief--faba!

RULES: answer the questions and tag 15 blogs you want to know better.

Nicknames: Bunni, Dan (irl)

Star Sign: Libra

Height: I dont think ive measured my height since i was a teenager, but around 5′6″ or 5′7″ or something? average height i guess

Time Right Now: 15:45

Last thing I Googled: “Endellion” cos its the username someone had in a game or something that was on my dash, and i wanted to know what the name means cos its cool. Apparantly its the name of a saint?

Last Movie I Watched: rewatching Finding Dory and CRYING AGAIN

Last TV Show I watched: Black Butler Book Of Circus, and before that it was ERASED/The Town Without Me. My picky side is so frustrated that the dub changed a cool name into something generic as hell :P

When did I create this blog: cant really remember, is tehre any way to find out? a fair few years I think, i cant recall if it was just after i ran away from home or just before?

Why I choose my URL: I’m bad at remembering stuff so I tend to use the same username and same password everywhere. (Tho spelling the password differently just in case. But cos bad memory i end up having to roll thru every single spelling every time I log in XD) Bunni89 was just the first username I had as a nine year old and it stuck. I wanted to be Bunny cos... it was the name of my plush rabbit doll. And my fave animal in general. I’m not very creative! And then the ‘lets spell it internet speak’ bit and the random number was just to try and find a version of bunny that wasnt already taken. Then I’ve just used that username for the next 15 years and its stuck so much that its even kinda my irl nickname now! Aaaand then just tumblunni because puns.

Gender: agender/nonbinary

Hogwards House: Slytherin cos i always feel sorry for anyone generically written off as a villain for stupid reasons, hufflepuff is probably more likely cos i have no special traits except being huggable.

Pokemon Team:  I try and have a different one each generation, like Ash. But i still keep all my previous teams pride of place in a special box in each game and I love doing postgame stuff and minigames with them. I get really attatched to my mons! I’m so guilty feeling that I lost two mons from my unova playthrough during the transfer bck and forth from friends’s games back when i didnt have a DS for a few years. my poor samurott and leavanny... :( Anyway, my current team in sun and moon is primarina, mimikyu, goloisipod, alola raichu, alola muk and lurantis! I wanted to have a drampa but i bought sun by accident instead of moon. And I also really like mareanie and that mossy anchor pokemon but they were so impossible to find that i only got them late in the postgame. I actually fished up an anchor friend myself but i had to trade for a mareanie :P

Favourite Colour: blue! and just the general aesthetic of black and white with one bright colour highlighting small details. thats a cool!

Lucky Number: 74 is my favourite number!

Favourite Character: TRESH GROMP GROOMPLE GRIMPLES GREMPY GROO y’all know who it be, i am not able to be silent about my faves aaaaand I have a bunch of other obscure minor character villain faves in other fandoms too, and just generally i am lame

Number of Blankets: Two, and a sleeping bag sometimes cos weather is so cold lately. We had like one unbearably hot day and then straight back to ice!

Name: Dan

Birthday: October 12th

Siblings: A half sister I havent seen in a decade... i hope she’s okay...

Favorite Smell: I have a really bad sense of smell and generally i can only smell really strong bad smell,s alas. Tho i do think gasoline smells nice and thats such an EVIL TRAP cos its all deadly gross fumes n stuff!

Pets: Had a cat, rabbit, fish and hamster as a kid, but havent had another pet for years. i really wanna someday be able to take care of one on my own!

Wake Up: consistancy is for the weak

Sleep: see previous question

Type of phone: i have no idea what this phone is, i dont know anything about phones. its some super cheap super bad touchscreen thingie i got in a christmas sale for twenty bucks

Love or Lust: aromantic asexual here giving a big ol shrug at this question

Lemonade or Tea: Lemonade. I am the worst brit, i hate tea XD

Cats or Dogs: Cats

Coke or Pepsi: Coke

Day or Night: Night

Text or Call: Text

Make up or natural: no makeup aaaa its a sticky face prison

Met a Celebrity: nope

Smile or Eyes: ??? WHAT DOES THIS MEAN. how can you compare the two. im just imagining someone smiling and their mouth is full of eyes. WHY DID YOU INSERT THIS IMAGE INTO MY BRAINMEATS

Light or Dark Hair: having dark hair is annoying when you wanna dye it, so i’ll go with light hair just for the practicality 
 Shorter or Taller: oh was all this meant to be about what you find sexy in someone instead of yourself?? cos im average height and i already answered that... 
 Intelligence or Attraction: wait this is a question about what you find most attractive so how does that make sense. unless it isnt...?? thing you most want to be: intelligence or sexyness? well i want everything except sexyness so there u go. 
 Chapstick or Lipstick: havent used either in over a decade 
 City or Country: both have their own good and bad points, ive had different social anxieties living in both :P 
 Last Song Heard: this cool amv for a movie i love pointless fact: it was legit made by the same director and animation team as the first digimon movie, its like the version of the script he wished he could have done as its own property. he also made wolf children!

Fruit or Vegetables: Froooooot

Anime or Cartoons: I like both in different ways. Mostly I just like a certain sort of story/art style/character lineup/etc and i like it no matter which genre it appears in. And i tend to really like the stuff that takes inspiration from both genres cos it seems they’re more likely to have that sort of stuff! Combining all the goodness! 
 Phone Case: wait you can buy cases for phones?? 
 Showers or Baths: showers are conveinient, baths are lazy. depends on how bad my day has been! 
 Dream Job: i dont have any dreams really, im a weirdo. ive never been able to find one. at best i flip through a few current hobbies and have a vague idea that it could be fun to be paid for doing them, but its never a really huge interest and i never try and work towards it cos i know im flaky and ive changed my mind a million times before. I hope someday i can find something that just clicks and i wanna do it forever!

Milk and Cookies or Doughnuts and Coffee: WAIT YOU EAT DONUTS WITH COFFEE?? WHY?? donuts are already soggy! thats weird! milk n cookies forever yo. or donuts on their own, but donuts are too sugary for me, i can never eat more than one without feeling sick.