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common-blackbird · 4 years

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Started!

This is my Inquisitor (so overjoyed you can be a qunari), her name is the default Herah and I decided I’m going to approach this game by staying true to a character and not looking to do everything and be on everyone’s good side u_u

I want to make a good background for her so i’m not telling anything. Yet. I’ll just say she’s a qunari mercenary and prefers using two-handed weapons.

Highlights from today:

Studying history does pay off! This was a reference to the famous book in environmental history - Guns, Germs and Steel by Jared Diamond. So proud i recognised it x)

Also i don’t have a good shot of solas but he cracks me up so much.. The guy has a posture of the typical retired grandpa (the only thing missing is to have him walk with his hands on his back). And there’s a scene where the party sees the rift and there’s the inquisitor facing it, cassandra bracing herself and solas... just standing like an old man

On a side note, Cassandra is so gorgeous and good and i already love her, i just keep taking shots of her TAT

As for varric, it’s so different than from da2, this is so much more “official” and you can see he’s the same as ever, but you’re not hawke, hawke’s not here, the gang’s not here and there’s nothing casual about the whole situation T-T

And lastly, my inquisitor has a horse now, i didn’t know that was possible in the game ;__;

played some more...

Let me start with.... The advisors! (+ cassandra... or is she also an advisor too?)

What a bunch. I love Cassandra’s and Leliana’s faith having a crisis bc they believe that Inquisitor is the Herald of Andraste and the way they deal with it. It’s really interesting. Leliana is completely opposite than what she was in origins and i’m surprised it doesn’t bother me at all! I love seeing this whole darker side that was only hinted at in origins, though it’s also sad when i think how she used to be. I wonder how she’s gonna overcome her doubting of faith.

Josephine is a delight. I keep using her for almost every war table mission for now. She radiates capability. She reminds me of those bureaucrats that are super nice and helpful and chill and even if you’re doing everything wrong she’ll just smile and say “it’s ok, we can fix it” and then goes and fixes everything herself (and you feel this insane amount of gratitude you send a whole separate email to thank her for her patience and help )

As for Cullen... It’s interesting... I got impression from what i saw in the fandom that he’s supposed to have had his allegiance changed and him rejecting the templars should have been him ultimately siding with the mages (or at least being anti-templar(?)), and that turning point that could have been a great way to show his character development during the game. Which i agree, only... i did not get that impression from the game so far at all. I mean, so far everything that i can remember him saying is totally smth he’d say in da2... He didn’t leave kirkwall bc of his disappointment with the templar order, he doesn’t seem to have any issues with the templars except those who go full war mode instead of trying to balance the situation. And it’s a really chaotic situtation, i love how they did it.

This line was amazing, i wish there was a special cutscene for that.

I’m loving the way they made this huge religious organisation in crisis have a complete collapse with the death of a key figure. I love the concept of inquisition and problems that it poses. I love you can see everyone’s reasoning and doubts reflect their background, but also see why inquisition can be understood as another power-grasping organisation trying to topple the templars, the mages and the chantry. Everything is divided. We got templars leaving the chantry, seekers leaving the chantry(?), rebel mages, loyal mages, rebel mages gone rouge, templars gone rouge, and suddenly there’s another organisation forming that you can totally believe is just another powerhungry force trying to get the piece of the cake by taking advantage of the power vacuum left by the sudden lack of the religious authority. (and only we know we’re The Good Guys). I love that we have characters who need to believe in the greater plan, characters who question the greater plan, and characters who want to utilise the power of belief and characters who don’t care for divine plans. The chaos is real and it feels real. I love that the centre figure of the whole holy business is a heretic of another culture. For the chantry this is the lose-lose situation (unless the inquisitor becomes religious by the end of the game). Which is why this line works so well.

Ok, now shorter updates:

Red Jenny! I know it’s not her actual name but it is in my head. Where’s that box i delivered ages ago >_> Anyways, she makes my brain work on 150% capacity. I can understand what she means only after i go over it for 5 times.

Forgive me but oh my god, i can’t believe that i can recognise one voice actor and now i have another mental image whenever he speaks. Like, he’s really good at bringing out a new character, but when he gets more casual he sounds like kanan jarrus from star wars rebels and i’m just “what are you doing here, space dad” ;__; Hopefully it’ll get old and i’ll be enjoying more iron bull. he seems nice...

Vivienne on the other hand is like a reverse Josephine(?) She seems insanely capable but hates customer service, however somehow she likes you very much and will do everything you need for reasons you can’t fathom. Have a screenshot. So classy. I already feel humbled.

and lastly, BREAKING NEWS: aveline finally hired carver ;__;

Tbh Kirkwall is still a mystery and i have so many questions but i don’t think i’ll get any answers... If a powervacuum of the divine cause this much chaos, how’s kirkwall faring without a new viscount? Like, yeah, aveline can keep in check, but umm it’s in a very vulnerable state which makes it a good target for any invasion... didn’t sebastian promise bloodshed?

That’s all for now, bc otherwise i’ll start writing an essay on cassandra.

We befriended a bear in the hinterlands!

lets start with this cool shot

so, i have been to the mages and to the templars and... i sided with the templars.... First i was all for mages since they offered negotiations while the seeker just walked away, but then it turned out that was a trap, there’s also tevinter mages there (which is a red flag for my inquisitor) and then there’s some time magic involved (which is a big no for me), and i just walked out. Felt bad for the mages but my inquisitor comes from a culture where mages have their tongues cut so...

Also this guy deserves a medal for putting up with corrupted superiors and annoying nobles.

And i met cole ;__; Where are Rhys and Evangeline ;___;

the templar mission was ok i guess... I was surprised that red lyrium was apparently circulating around for some time, not sure if that means since meredith or even before. I love the stories of corruption tho and to imagine what it’s like to be trapped in this organisation that just keeps breaking everything it stands for

As for the important mages, i’ve Dorian twice since i bailed out on him in Redcliffe :I I love the guy, he seems arrogant yet so kind (like, no one would have carried that annoying priest and yet he did, after he ran from his own people to warn us after i ditched him in Redcliffe? man ;A;) Every time i go with “ok the inquisitor fears tevinter and distrusts this rando who just popped in” i am marinating in guilt.

and then we fight some mages and die several times but we succeed and we meet the bad guy...

Is it an unpopular opinion to say that i like him as a villain so far? i saw so many jokes on his incompetency. Idk, i like that part where he said that he reached the fade in someone’s name, it makes me think he’s not just power-hungry person(?) who’s just evil,but was originally serving someone, and he said that the gods were either gone or corrupted and he spent hundreds of years thinking what to do with whatever happened so he seems like he knows what he’s doing and maybe(!just maybe) he is trying to fix things that are wrong but we can’t see that? And of course he hates the inquisitor, he has to redo his stuff all over again, i’d hate the inquisitor too. im probably looking too much into it. My wish is that, if he’s evil, he became so gradually, but originally had good intentions? Or there’s more to things going on that we just don’t know and he does... Maybe this was his tragic attempt to fix things but he would ultimately fail and be branded as a villain etc etc. I’m getting carried away

If it turns out he’s just evil for the sake of being evil then feel free to tell me so now so i don’t embarrass myself further with plotting myself lol.

A side note, is he the Architect? Or the same? In DA2 he says he’s a tevinter magister, right? and he ceased to be a human. Also in DA2 it seemed like he was the boss, and here he said he reached in the name of someone (probably more important than him). But what is the Architect then?

And with that we reach the skyhold.

in skyhold

I didn’t know you meet hawke so soon ;__; i thought that was like, somewere more to the end of the game, since the big decision and all. But the mission is already opened and i am going to procrastinate on it until i finish every side mission :<

Also he is so sad ;__; i understand, but at the same time... all that humour now bitter sarcasm :’(

(also, very shallow remark, but i really really prefer his looks in da2 than here... it’s like they softened him. He’s more...oh god idk bearish(???) than hawkish(????) you know what i mean? the nose isn’t as sharp anymore, the beard is... what is it with the beard... anyways i get the game has its limits so it’s fine. it’s fine! fine.)

then there was the fight that i remember since twitter >:D

It’s what made me want to play dragon age and i finally reached it T-T so good! I love how you can see the both sides and everything they say is true but they’re so angry at themselves they’re taking it out on each other TAT

Cassandra later says Hawke probably wouldn’t have joined the inquisition even if she found him, and i wonder now if that’s true... At first i thought, nah, Hawke has too much of a hero complex, he would feel too responsible to just say no. Besides, he’s with the inquisition now (tho i can’t find him anywhere anymore!). But at the same time, the way da2 ends was such an iconic walking away from everything, and not taking into account the hocus-pocus rift stuff, i can imagine him refusing, especially seeing how bitter he is now. It’s also a question of how much would have cassandra told him i guess. idk, what do you think? Would he lead or nah?

another person i want to find but can’t in skyhold are the templars with ser barris. i can use them on war table missions but otherwise they’re non-existant? i forgot to talk to him back in haven but now i wonder if it was even possible and if he was even available there, since he isn’t here. I spent hours just running around skyhold looking for the guy :(

and then everything becomes unimportant bc aaaaa!! she! is the arcanist! Dagna! im so happy and proud(?) she went and reached her goals x)

anyways that’s all for now, laters

some random updates:

so i did the halamshiral and gave up to my “stick to the character” mode, and nothing went my way, but that’s life. Met morrigan! i almost forgot she appears lol. And, despite also jumping on the wagon of give-morrigan-better-clothes train, i have to admit seeing her in her old clothes was a relief after that dress at the ball. It’s not the way the dressed looked, but the way she moved in it... god im shallow

i also initially didn’t like morrigan being at orlais court of all places, but after the conversation that’s supposed to explain why she’s there i’m kinda ok with it. I mean, i still need some more info. Wouldn’t Tevinter be better? she’d practically become a magister overnight if she got this good in the game so fast. It’s also unconvincing how everyone knows everything in orlais but somehow nobody connected that the random kid that has no bakcground whatsoever with morrigan who keeps checking on him? But at skyhold she’s just “hey i have a kid, he’s no trouble, right?” but hey, it’s morrigan. She can do anything. I’ll just have another story idea in my head.

Then there was news of the new divine that could be either cassandra or leliana and i don’t honestly know whom to choose. I’d prefer leliana over cassandra simply bc cassandra is more of a military mind, while the position of the divine would be more political. But lately every mission with leliana was spy spy, kill kill... Do we really want that for a religious leader? On the other hand, it would nicely round up her story from origins to inquisition... But cassandra is more of a public figure than leliana is...

when cassandra said:

“I want to respect the tradition, but not fear change. I want to right the past wrongs, but not avenge them. And I have no idea if wanting any of them makes them right.”

great moment. She’s usually so convinced and rash, i forget she’s more doubtful and open minded than what she looks like. Everything about cassandra is different from the impression she gives ;__; I love her so so so so much. (when she says she considers the inquisitor her friend i melted, next time varric pulls up the “seeker has no friends” joke, my heart will no longer be breaking).

I did a bunch of personal missions. Some were cool, some were ????. Also there were war table missions with zevran, that was cool. Also i love the codex entries in skyhold. The archery competition with varric banned? Dancing lessons failing bc lace harding is on the move all the time? Perfect.

And i met chargers, i like them, and aaah that staff-bow from the trailer is such a cool idea ;A;

What i don’t get with bull’s chargers is - they’re a mercenary group right? But isn’t swordselling seen as the complete misunderstanding of the qun? I get only bull is qunari, but he’s the leader of them? How is that not frowned upon?

And lastly, i don’t think i’ve said this, but i love that they added codex entries in the loading screens. love it.

update

After months of procrastination, i have faced my fears and have met alistair. it was very anticlimatic beating 11 level monsters when i was level 21...

but.. ALISTAIR TAT He’s changed... but not changed... but changed! Like, his personality is the same, but he’s more serious, doesn’t run from responsibilities, isn’t as bitter as hawke (also, why do i get impression that i am supposed to get the impression that they’re friends? they’ve met like, once, and talked for less than a minute.. whatevs. let’s pretend they’ve met again when on the run), i really love the inquisition alistair ;;__;;

Also, i managed to get that awkward demon baby family reunion :D

know that morrigan says the vaguest generic thing “i told him his father was a good man” bc of various world states, but i also think she’s come a long way not to mock alistair, and then when he notices that she didn’t use the opportunity he mentions that the kid changed her and she’s like “pfft, yea right, you wish”....

... when she was the one who said that in the first place ;;__;;

Awwww :> I love that they bicker but softly. Kids have grown up :’) Anyways, when will alistair start paying alimony

The only weird one is Leliana bc when morrigan was introduced she was like “danger danger” (smth i’d sooner think alistair would do), and when alistair is (supposedly) in skyhold, Leli doesn’t even mention him, only hawke. bruh, what were they to you, you almost died together ;;__;;

oh i also slayed a dragon. I didn’t even want to fight that dragon. It was a hillarious feat of inquisitor, solas, cole and blackwall, all on level 21, having to chug all the health potions right at the beginning while fighting a dragon that was... level 13, after which i just let go of controls and suddenly everyone was hella good at fighting and slayed it (only cole needed revival several times).

And, befitting the wild-dream feel that it had, when i got back to skyhold and visited companions, suddenly i was drinking pelin with iron bull, and he’s reminiscing on that fight with the dragon and i’m like

it was awful and you weren’t even there.

i forgot to update

but last time i was playing i finished the hawke/alistair sacrifice and all the torture i went through with deciding whom to sacrifice vanished bc frankly, at one moment, i wanted to sacrifice both of them, but in the end it was much more easier to sacrifice hawke bc inquisition hawke just didn’t feel like hawke to me, while alistair improved since the origins!

and now i remembered why i didn’t update, in the same day cassandra rejected me so i was sad and didn’t continue playing since then (i think last time i played it was around easter?)

new update

BLACKWALL!! or should i say Thom Rainier? Wow, what an arc! It was also so fun bc i was all strict mode, picking the third option, telling him his life is in inquisitor’s hands and all that, but in the end i set him free. He’s so good, a true knight T-T

Also i romanced sera. we’ll see how that goes.

Also, fave point in the game so far, i wanted, for so long, to sit at that val roeayoux (can’t spell) cafe and finally did it with cole’s personal mission. THANK YOU COLE YOU TRULY CAN READ PEOPLE’S MINDS.

another interesting thing was that after specialising as a reaver, cassandra said that drinking dragon blood makes you grow scales and become mad. Iron Bull said that inquisitor smells better bc dragon blood and that qunari generally smell better than humans. So i’m guessing qunari have fractions of dragon in them? ok...

and now i started that mission with morrigan and the puzzles are killing me lol, i am this 👌 close to just go chase calpernia and give up on a well of sorrows.

#it's a terrible time to start a dragon age game but it's the only time #meet me at val royeaux with my pal cole fixing people's lives every sunday 5 pm

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minejiro · 3 years

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hi, tee <3 this is a moot who's a little to shy to ask you this off anon, but how did you come up with the courage to archive your blog after 8 months? i've been planning to move for a couple of weeks now, and i have a new account set up and everything, but i feel conflicted about leaving my 10 month old account.

i'm about to reach 2k, which is something that holds me back; i'm not planning to delete anything or change aliases, but i just feel like it's really difficult to let go, even though i'm not making an intense move. thank you for listening to me ramble <3

hi bby omg im about to spill my whole tumblr experience to you LMAO jvhufdbv but maybe itll put things into perspective for you and youll be able to tell if its something that you still want to do or not !!

so im just gonna be transparent here, i had 14k ppl on mine when i left and that was kind of hard to leave no matter what anyone says. ofc its always about the writing first and foremost, but i built so many anons and inside jokes and interactions and i had a name for myself and stuff, and thats definitely hard to let go of bc i built that up you know ?? but then i looked at it in a more narrowed view than a "bigger picture" view and it was a matter of am i happy on here anymore ??

now thats partly bc i was just drained of writing hq in general, but even when i was happy to write for hq, the blog just got tiring. that blog made me happy and i was proud of it, so i was attached, but at the end of the day being that big was also draining me more than i realized bc i was dealing with ppl being pushy or expectant, or rly rude comments to rly hateful ones, and i felt like the interactions themselves werent as genuine anymore as they used to be. ppl brought up things about the blog itself, its stats, how my writing wasnt what it used to be, how i was just doing things that were "popular" to get notes, etc instead of what it was about — haikyuu

so i took a leap and kind of started a new fandom (tokrev) and that was my excuse to start a new blog from the ground up and it seemed less scary bc it didnt seem like i was starting over per say, i was just adding something new, but it still needed to built up again

and then thats what changed my worries tbh bc once i started my tokrev blog and i posted and built interactions, i realized it wasnt as awful as id been telling myself it would be you know ?? the interactions slowly built, my work was being read and slowly gaining more interaction, and overall my blog was just being built up and i realized that building a blog back up not only wasnt as awful as i thought it would be. it also gave me a chance to redo things better and take what ive learned from the last one to set better boundaries for my followers and myself. and also, it helped running a blog be fun again bc as ive said before, my blog in its smaller days was a lot more fun bc ppl talked to me bc i was just me, not tee whos in the top tags all the time (im sry hfbehfb that might sound kinda bad and maybe a little conceited but i mean that in the least self absorbed way bc in all honesty the size of my blog was rly what a lot of my asks and even some moot interactions were centered around anymore)

in the end, the followers you built up will come again bby they will, trust me i was sad about seeing all my hard work be "left behind" too but the restart is so refreshing and it gives u a chance to organize and set up everything to make this an even safer space for you. if you stick it out for a bit, youll start to get rly excited about the growth and progress you made, and the last blog wont be on your mind as much because youll want to start pouring more into building the new one, and i think thats the part that made me take the full leap and just drop hq blog all together

i was actually gonna deactivate that blog if im being honest, but there some extremely touching asks that made me rethink bc i didnt think my writing meant that much to ppl, so ive left it as an archive, and i think thats honestly the best thing i can do at this point, just leave it to be appreciated for what it is instead of trying to make it fun again and drain myself more

oferfirhgb this was so long im so sorry LMAO but idk i hope that maybe helped a little bit sobsobsob

feel free to dm me if you wanna talk about this !! dont be shy omg i love all my moots <3 even if we dont get a chance to interact as much

#love letters #no return address

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kisstheashes · 5 years

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👀👀👀 Got anything you can tell us about SP?

OH BOY! Alright. Since you didn’t ask for any particular chapter, you’re getting a SHITTON of info. *cracks knuckles* Let’s get started.

This ended up being long af so there needed to be a cut!

1) When I first had the idea for SP, I was heavily inspired not only by SAW in general but SAW II in particular. SAW II takes place in an abandoned house (SP takes place in an abandoned warehouse for the first 8 chapters), and every person had an individual trap made specifically for them (the first 8 chapters are split up by person, and Anti has unique methods for all of them).

2) SP was the first story I’ve planned out for years. And still YET, it’s not what it was supposed to be. The original ending for SP was basically…nearly everyone dies.

2.5) What almost became the real ending (not the original ending, a different idea) was something like this: Anti kills Chase and has Schneep, but that’s where the similarities end. (suicide TW ahead) Anti was supposed to take Marvin and make him a puppet. And Jackie, traumatized and desperate to find his brothers, leaves a barely functional JJ alone and without help. So JJ ends up killing himself with Chase’s old gun while Jackie is looking for Anti’s hideout. Jackie comes back and sees a dead JJ and loses it. He can’t cope. It was supposed to end with Jackie standing by JJ’s grave, feeling like an utter failure, and Anti approaches him, tells him that since there’s nothing left for him here, what’s he to lose by becoming a puppet? And Jackie goes with him. I can’t tell whether that’s more or less tragic than the real ending.

3) When I FIRST sat down to start writing the very first lines, I had no idea who my main character would be. It’s such a little moment, but I remember it so so clearly. I was sitting on the edge of my bed, just waiting to see who would wake up first (a la SAW style) and I actually recoiled when it was Marvin. I never paid him any attention before SP. And I just went “Ma…Marvin?? Are you sure brain?? MARVIN??” Yes, my brain was sure XD

4) First chapter. Everything happened as planned, which if you are a writer or know us, you know this is very rare. Everyone woke up, the narration was smooth, the characters were introduced so nicely, and their relationships with Anti were automatically all so different from each other. It went beautifully.

5) Chapter 2: Static Corruption. This chapter gave me issues. I originally wanted Anti to force Schneep to “operate” on one of his brothers, but the pieces weren’t moving in that direction. Then I was like ‘oh, I’ll still keep the operation table there because he’ll likely need it since Anti won’t want his puppets to die.’ That…was supposed to happen but didn’t. The operation table ended up being there simply to mock Schneep. I would 100% go back and redo how I did that so that would come across clearer, since I know it’s purpose was left very vague.

5.5) I am so SO proud of Schneep’s corruption. To be honest, I had no fucking idea what I was doing. I was still learning about Anti and his powers, how he does things, and honestly I should go back and reread it because it came together so well. And Schneep was the first to go because he had already been corrupted, and weakened. He was an easy target, and Anti KNEW he needed Schneep because he can’t easily heal wounds. Anti’s smart like that.

6) Chapter 3 & 4: Burn Marks. Anti had to take out Marvin early. He knew this like he knew he needed Schneep. Marvin was not only powerful but he was hard to break. He was controlled. He wasn’t easily moved to rash decisions and as long as his breathing was steady, he was in control. Hence the collar in ch 3. Anti also knew that Marvin could not use as much magic if he didn’t have his wand, hence taking it from him in the beginning of the chapter. And he knew Marvin was scared of fire.

6.5) Character analysis aside though, this chapter was my first true dive into torture. I’d never written torture before this chapter. Never. I surprised myself, honestly. When I wrote Anti sticking the raw blowtorch into the cauterized cut, I was floored. I kinda didn’t know it was happening until it did. XD And Anti forcing Marvin to eat his own flesh was…somehow logical to me? I was like ‘maybe since Anti eats flesh he thinks Marv will like it too.’ Which was wrong. He just wanted to torture my son. But these two chapters are everything to me, being my first delve into torture. Really, these chapters, and especially chapter four, started it all. I was really excited to write more gore.

7) Ch 5: Consequences. Everyone hates this chapter. When I get new readers now, about half of them who ‘like’ every single chapter will skip ‘liking’ this chapter. Because I was ballsy and killed Chase. In front of his daughter. Not only did I kill Chase, I dismembered him and had Anti eat his organs. That’s ballsy as fuck, but at the time I had no idea it was so ballsy. What I did think might be too much and what I do regret is not killing Jasmine instantly and only making that an illusion. I’ve said this before. I still hate myself for it. I should have just outright killed her. I wrote it to showcase how awful Anti is. I took it out because I ws scared. I regretted it the moment I uploaded it, and that’s when I told myself I’d never censor my writing again. So I don’t. While that’s an awful moment in the series, I did learn a very valuable lesson that I will pass onto every writer I know. When it comes to awful deeds, don’t censor yourself.

8) Ch 6: Questionably Human. First of all, this chapter wasn’t supposed to exist, point blank, period. When I originally wrote SP, this chapter wasn’t there. I added it in because as I edited through and understood Marvin more, I knew Anti would understand he couldn’t leave Marvin alone through dealing with all of the other Septics. He’s too resilient. So I added this chapter in. And it was also my first true delve into psychological toture/manipulation with Anti. Which is very interesting with my Anti, because he can’t lie. Working an entire chapter around half truths and whole truths was tricky. It was a challenge. But y’know, I think it probably helped me be able to do other tricky dialogue, like with Maze.

8.5) Because writing Schneep as a puppet deserves it’s own bullet. I had NO idea how I was going to do this. Because of how my Anti’s puppets work, I didn’t have a clue how to do this. Anti’s puppets keep their base personality so he can have them out in the world, undercover ect without anyone seeing anything weird. But they also don’t have thoughts of their own, or really wants of their own, besides very basic needs. This is a tricky combination when it comes to the stubborn, mood-swingy, irritable, mind of his own doctor. And honestly, I don’t know how I pulled it off. I can’t remember how I did this so well. It’s just a blank XD

9) Ch 7: Broken Toys. This is my personal favorite chapter. JJ’s chapter was unqiue in so many ways, because he had a legitimate past with Anti. Anti pretended to be his friend, then tortured him for days on end. So we have long flashbacks that portray this, and I was really nervous they weren’t blended well. They have a dialogue where JJ speaks only in his head, which is very unique. And in this chapter, I faced one of my squicks. I hate eye gore. Yet I braved it and took JJ’s eye out with a melonballer, then Anti ate it. That was fuckin gross, tbh. XD The ending of his chapter though. It changed 3 times. The original ending did make use of the operation table, but I hated it bc I didn’t know how to write puppet Schneep and scrapped it. I think the second ending was JJ bleeding out on the floor. The third ending is the meathook ending. Absolutely horrific ending, when you take into account 1) its fucking meathooks and 2) they had to be ripped out of healed muscle and skin. I went balls to the walls for this chapter as well, and it fucking payed off.

10) Ch 8: Glitched Death. This is the start of the chapters that are like ‘I’m writing it but idk where it’s going.’ I had no idea any of it was going to happen, but damn I’m glad all of it did. And again with the ballsy moves, disabling Jackie was ballsy as fuck. It shocked a lot of people like nothing had before. Though my most proud moment of this chapter was the fight scene. The last time I’d written a fight scene was when I was ten. I didn’t do any research or nothing. I just DID. And I remember a comment was “I didn’t know you could write fight scenes!” I didn’t either. But I remember being really happy to write Marvin as such a badass :D To show that he was ready to kill Anti no matter the cost. The worst part of the chapter was writing Jackie pulling the meathooks out. I hated that. I hated it so much. Listen, I know JJ deserved better. And how many of you caught that Anti was very weak as this chapter ended? ;)

11) Ch. 9: Irrepareable Damage. This chapter was hard to write. I hadn’t jumped time like this for a long time. The first 8 chapters all take place in one night. Ch 9 took place over a month and a half, showcasing the immediate aftermath of what happened. Chase and his daughter were dead. Jackie was wheelchair bound. JJ had limited sight and mobility. Marvin’s panic disorder grew worse, and they all had night terrors. It was endlessly emotional. And then…you get to the end. And it hits you in the fucking gut. Anti carves his name into Marvin’s skin, while essentially having him drugged. And Marvin comes to, and sees the wound, and cries. He’s reaping what he sowed and he hates every minute of it.

12) Ch 10: Torn Stitches. I still don’t care for this chapter. It feels too dull. But you guys seemed to like it, so I guess that means its good, right? This chapter was special to me though, because I’d never touched on Marvin’s backstory much. And it was important to me that you all knew it, for some reason. Plus his old friends just fit into the narrative, so I indulged myself. And that’s the other thing. First chapters with OCs. I don’t care for Silas that much, but I really like Whitney. She’s fun. This chapter was necessary as well, so you could see all of the aftermath slowed down. See how damaged they are, and see the aftermath of the carving. Which I again smack ya’ll in the face with the end.

13) As closing, this story is my baby. And i’ve got a lot more angst coming for it, even if only 2 chapters are left (supposedly). 42.5k words, 11 chapters, and we ain’t done yet. I’ve got huge plans for the next chapter, so watch out for it. ;)

Author Commentary?

#ask #anonymous #self preservation #writing stuff #jacksepticeye #it took me a whole ass hour to write this pls appreciate it

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jisokai · 6 years

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hello there! I love your writings a lot ❤️ and I was wondering if you could do a HC of how the RFA + V/Ray would react to MC who is not confident about herself or comfortable when she doesn't wear make up even if it's just light make up? Like for example whenever her s/o is around she'd have to at least wear some light make up or she'd hide or something. (sorry if it's a weird HC, it's my first time requesting one..!) Thank you and I hope you have a great week! x)

hello and thank you for sending this!! i do this at school (until midterms and finals bc i just show up with no makeup and a the same hoodie for a week), so i feel you! just remember that youre beautiful no matter what you think!!

rfa+ray+v reacting to an mc who needs to wear makeup 24/7 to be confident

yoosung- he probably doesnt notice much if its light makeup, so he thinks its just how you look- until one time you make an off hand comment about smudging your mascara and start fixing it- ?????????? he so confused??- were having a late night cram studying session why are you wearing makeup?????- he says you should just take it off and not worry about it since its late- but you insist to fix it and he just frowns and asks if youre okay- you sigh and explain to him that you just dont feel comfortable without it and even just a little makes you feel better…- he tells you that he wont judge you!! youre beautiful no matter what and you should feel comfortable with him- he understands if you leave it on but he tries his hardest to remind you that youre so pretty and you dont need makeup!!

zen- he definitely notices it- being on stage so much, hes had light makeup himself so he can see the clumps of mascara and powders- but he doesnt say anything- he doesnt want you uncomfortable!!- but when youre getting ready for bed in the bathroom one night, he nonchalantly hands you a makeup wipe- you slowly take it, but dont actually use it- he looks over at you questioningly and does his little “hm?”- he asks whats wrong and you quietly explain that you dont like being seen without makeup- he just smiles at you and softly gives you a hug, saying youre beautiful and dont need to worry about such things!! but its not good to leave it on, and you should take care of yourself- hes gonna get you comfortable with him no matter what

jaehee- she notices- i mean she probably wears makeup too, so she wouldnt think anything of it- but she notices that you wear it all the time- she makes an offhand comment about it not being good for your skin and that you might want to take it off- you dont really say anything, and she can pick up on the fact that youre not confident- she just hugs you and tells you that youre beautiful!! shes explains how she gets insecure too and know the pain- she helps you gain confidence around her and feel more comfortable with yourself

jumin- he notices it too- being around so many women who doll themselves up, he notices you like to do the same- and even when youre relaxed and casual with him, he sees the light makeup you put on- hee doesnt think much of it, guessing that you just liked that kind of stuff- but once you were out together and your makeup smeared when you hugged him,, getting on his shirt and smudging on your face- you panic when you see his suit and try to wipe at it with a removal pad, but he brushes you off and says not to worry about it- instead, he takes the wipe and gently tries to removes the smudges from your face, but you back away and tell him you can handle it- he just needs to wait a moment so you can touch up- but he tells you not to worry about it, you look fine without it and itll take too long to redo- you kind of insist and it makes him frown, asking whats wrong- you fess up and explain why, saying you feel weird without makeup around him, especially in public or when hes surrounded by so many men women jdsfjg- hes so extra, probably taking your hands and looking you in the eye while delivering a speech about how beautiful you are- youre so embarrassed jumin pleas but it makes you feel a lot better and he works to make you more comfortable and confident

seven- ok he loves makeup- he loves it so much have you heard his calls??- but he loves when you wear it and asks you to do his (and vice versa)- but he notices that you always have a little on when around him- youre so cautious about it, you make sure to have it on even around the security cameras- he can guess why and just asked you upfront about it- you confirm his suspicions and tell him how you like the security,, it makes you feel insecure when you dont have it- he gets it!! boy has many insecurities himself- but he doesnt want you feeling the same :((- he tries to coax you into taking your makeup off when he does, so itll feel like someones there experiencing it too- and he always compliments you on your skin or general beauty when you dont have any makeup on

ray (in his route - at the ME building)- i think he would always notice it, but never really ask in fear of offending you- but he finally got courage to mention it and kind of blurted out a compliment- you smile and thank him and it makes him so happy oh my god hes so precious- but one day he came in when you werent exactly ready and he saw you without any makeup on- he noticed the difference and didnt comment, but it didnt help your discomfort with him seeing you like that- you ask for him to leave and he turns into a puddle, apologizing profusely and trying to leave asap- but you call for him back, telling him its not his fault, you just dont like being seen without any makeup- hes reassuring!! dont worry!!! he tells you that youre beautiful without it and hes happy to see you like that!- it comforts you and he tries to mention how pretty you look whenever he checks up on you

v- i headcanon that he wears eyeliner BITCH have you seen the cg of him standing behind yoosung after graduation- eyeliner- anyways, he notices and hes really just concerned for the health of your skin- he wants you comfortable so he doesnt say anything against it, but he knows that you feel uncomfortable- you stay with him for a night and after taking it off you kind of shy away and avoid meeting his face- but hes NOT HAVIN IT!! so he just pulls you to him and kisses you right on the lips, telling you he doesnt care about you not having makeup on and that you should always feel comfortable with him- he starts complimenting everything and its too much hes such a cinnamon roll- like everyone else, tries to compliment you more and remind you of the beauty you have under all the makeup

masterlist

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the-space-case · 7 years

Note

Hi! I really like your comic and your style and I was wondering: do you have any tips for people like me who would like to make their own comics? I've tried before but I never seemed to reach the 5th page without giving up.

Hiya! I have a few tips. I’m not trained or anything these are just some of my personal methods. it might not even work for you since everyone is different but it might help? They’re not really in a particular order either haha.

1.) Like what you’re making. This one is kind of obvious but really if you’re not completely invested in the story you’re making it’ll fall flat due to a lack of interest. Make your comic about things you like! Not like fleeting things like actual things you’ve enjoyed for awhile generally. Like spooky things, or cute things for example.

2.) Make alot of rough drafts. All at once. Flesh out an entire chapter really roughly. I mean real rough. like gesture drawing rough that takes like fifteen minutes or less a page. I’ll make about seventeen rough draft pages at once, simmer about it for a few days, and then go back to add more if im satisfied OR i’ll redo the chapter entirely. If you have a whole chapter roughed out it’ll be easier to work on it later because its already there for you.

3.)double back to check the pacing. Sometimes its weird in the rough drafts so you gotta throw some panels around or add an extra page. if it feels a bit off leave it and the come back a few hours or days later. youll find it out pretty quick after a break.

4.)dont be afraid to fix mistakes. If something looks weird or clashes with the page when you’re still doing lineart, go back to the roughdraft layer and fix it. zoom in and out of the page and check to make sure the drawing isnt tilted oddly or disproportional. i myself have issues with proportion so im constantly fixing bits and pieces using cntrl+T haha. It’ll save you trouble if you do it early instead of later when all the layers are in the way.

This next one is a little bit counterproductive to #4 but its for after the page is done.

5.) accept mistakes. You’re making alot of art for one page. you’ll notice looking back on finished pages that theres gonna be a lower quality over it bc of sheer quantity, but you’ll fall into a rhythm and realize you’re making a steady incline in quality overall if you keep moving forward. once you declare that a page is done, leave it.

6.) just do it. Youre gonna be afraid to start, wondering how its going to be received, wondering if its good enough. You have to shove the anxiety down as violently you can and draw it as if you’re your only audience. Do it for yourself, because you know that you’ll improve your skill and even yourself by making it.

7.) keep your files organized. I label every page for recovery as RECOVERY and then a number--for example, RECOVERY2.17 is for recovery chapter two page seventeen. your files, if placed alphabetically, will all be in a row for an easy browse. keep it all in their own place for easy finding.

8.) make a palette and references. Consistency is IMPORTANT. I drew Will a few times to get a feel for him before i started the comic, and used the eyedropper tool repeatedly so the colors were consistent in the comic. (I didn’t do the same for the pine twins and it shows if you go through the comic a bit fast lol) The palette doesnt have to be fancy, just make sure you know what everything is for. Also make sure you know your kerning and leading settings so the panels are consistent as well. (mine is below!) make a checklist if you need to for the math stuff, i use the stickies app on my laptop for a checklist of things to make sure to add before i say im done--like shading, for example, that for some reason i always forget. Also the font type, gen font size, details like tattoos and quirks.

9.) HAVE FUN. Inject some humor into your drawing to keep yourself entertained when you work--for example, i label my layers in puns and quips. the skin layer is usually called “skiiiiiiiiin” and copies are usually called “___ 2: electric boogaloo”. when i made homestuck drawings id label them with a character quirk instead haha. Also its good to listen to podcasts or music when you work. I listen to music, The Adventure Zone, Welcome to Night Vale, Game Grumps or The Yogscast when i’m working. Audiobooks are also a good idea! Have it in a playlist so you dont have to stop drawing to change it.

10.) Don’t let yourself get distracted, but take breaks when you need them. Food and hydration as well as bathroom breaks are v important. You cant survive to draw if you dont eat, and keep in mind that being dehydrated gives you headaches and messes with workflow. eat that food. dont die. not eating messes with your psyche--youre more likely to be depressed/make it worse/stope working if you dont eat so do that shit. keep some snacks and a waterbottle handy. also lower the caffeine shakes are good for some styles but not others lmfao.

also: avoid tumblr when working. give yourself a set time/timelimit to work. you’ll realize that once you start its easier to keep rolling but you cant be interrupted or itll be harder to get back to in the middle when scrolling the many delightful distractions of the internet. be brisk in your breaks.

11.) i have depression so this is especially important--REMEMBER TO TAKE YOUR MEDS IF YOU HAVE ANY. p self explanatory. i go through withdrawals if i dont and get the worst migraines so i mean keep on top of that shit.

12.)Uh hhhh thats all i got OH WAIT reward yourself for finishing pages. Be it a treat or a nice bubble bath or some videogame time. Whatever you want. just reward yourself for working. even if its work you weren't entirely satisfied with, have something to look forward to when you finish, and tell yourself you did well because you just did a fuckton of work. BE PROUD

(also some people say to tell other people about what youre doing so theyll check up on you to make sure youre working but?? i kind of feel like im being nagged if thats the case so that just depends on you lol. )

#personal jazz #making comics #comics #artists on tumblr #tips and tricks #recovery #Anonymous

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