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painsandconfusion · 2 years

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Anon Ask Lineup!!

I got SO many gorgeous lurker confirmation asks, and wow I love you guys so much. You're way too sweet to me. Ahhhhhhh.

That being said, a lot of you had questions and I said I wouldn't rb those asks, but there were several overlapping ones anyway, so I'm just going to make one biiiiiiiggggggg post answering questions here!

How long did I lurk? Six years or so? Longer? I knew I loved whump since I was a little tiny kiddo, but didn't know there was a word for it (I feel like this is a common experience lol), and started following hero x villain things (also a common experience) that eventually lead me to the whump community. I didn't make this blog (well, the same url - it used to be a sideblog and it moved but I'm counting it) about two years ago? But I only started making my own content one year ago.

Have I ever regretted making my blog instead of lurking? Since I started this one? No. But there was a time before where I made a side blog (same url) and started making some whumpy gif sets? And I loved it and was having a nice time with no one knowing or following me, but it was immediately picked up by the kink community instead of this one. While I don't have any problem with that, I felt like I wasn't in the right place and that no one was really listening and I was getting sucked in the wrong direction, so I panicked and deleted the blog. Cut lurking again for two years before making this one.

Was I ever ashamed of whump? Um. Yes. Still kind of am (I'm working on it), but I grew up in a very religious household, and I'm an extremely kind and gentle person irl, so it felt like this horrific denial both of my faith and of myself. I read a post a year and a half ago or so that clarified the difference between fiction and reality for whump, and something about it just made the pieces fit together again for me. It wasn't long after that that I got started making my own content.

How I moved from being a reblogger to a creator? There was one prompt list (here) that I just fell in love with and had a few ideas to continue? So I did. And it got SO many more notes than I expected and I just........fell in love with it? I found I have a knack for prompt lists - much more than gif sets. So I started making prompt lists. They got popular pretty quick. Then I was challenged to do Whumptober, and I did. After that, I felt comfortable starting my own series and doing drabbles and I haven't looked back.

How many irl people know about whump/my blog? Four who I didn't meet through this. I've told three friends and my sister - all of whom took it FAR more gracefully than I expected. While whump isn't their thing, they're incredibly supportive and generally confused why I'm so embarrassed about it. Oops-

Is my whump fixation purely whump, kink, or both? Uhmmmmmmmm....I like whump. I like whump in any context. That bleeds into kink as well. I don't post NSFW things here because a lot of my readers are minors and I genuinely don't trust the tagging system to keep their sweet lovely eyes off the abominations I create asdlkf. But if I'm in an 18+ area where people are chatting, I'm more than willing to discuss it or put out ideas/content. I'm getting more comfortable with it by the day (everyone has hurtles to get over in self-acceptance - that's one of mine).

Do I use whump as an outlet for something else? I know a lot of people have turned to whump to process trauma, but that's not my story. I have loved it since forever, and my ptsd isn't something I ever want to encounter in whump. I have those tags blocked so fucking hard, I don't want to be triggered in my safe space (that's just me - everyone processes differently). But. I do find that it greatly eases my anxiety and nightmares. If I go a week or two without writing or consuming something terrifying, my anxiety doesn't really have an outlet? And it bleeds into dreams. I often have very whumpy dreams, but I don't consider them nightmares, they're just lovely. But the nightmares? Nope. Nuh-uh. Don't want. It's a very small part of why I write, but it's a lovely bonus.

Whelp I think that's all of them?? Shoot me another ask if I missed one - it wasn't intentions.

Love you all so so much - I'm glad you reached out!

General disclaimer: all these are my own expeiance and do not speak to or dictate in any way how others interact with this community or their pasts - everyone's journey is their own, this one is just mine.

#sand asks #whump community #lurker interactions

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princesshalfdemon · 2 years

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anyways if it seems like i’ve been thinking about religion more based on some of my points

a few months ago there was a really bad tornado warning. i’ve lived in chicago my whole life. i go through 3-4 tornado warnings every year. one time when i was little (and now this COULD have been a dream or something bc i don’t remember details) i think ia ctually did see a tornado.

a really bad tornado warning happened while i was at work at the clinic. let me be clear: we do not have basements in the clinic, and it go so bad so quick there was no way to feasibly safely get anywhere else. i was fucking terrified. on discord i literally. sent several messages to those very close of me because i genuinely, sincerely though that was... a really good chance at being it. if a tornado actually had hit the clinic directly? realistically? that’s game over. clocking out. it wasn’t a long life but i could say it was a good one.

nothing happened and it was the biggest sigh of relief i ever had but it DID have me questioning my religious beliefs. i’ve always been agnostic- i don’t know if there’s one God, a million gods, or none- but i think there’s... something in us that lives after death. something that can’t be explained by science. i think there’s too much things in the world that can’t be explained by science for that to be the case. and i also accept i could be wrong and that’s clocks out.

i had thought about going to church again. i then learned my childhood church was a mega church and the pastor might’ve tried to hire a hitman. i THEN learned that very close by there’s this really nice pro LGBT methodist church. a church i drive by almost every day that’s always flying an LGBT (and now ukranian) flag visibly. and i went ot their website... and it looked really nice. i really thought about going that weekend. i chose not to. saturday is one of my only days i can really spend the night with my friends... that’s important to me. marston actually showed me this one really cool pro lgbt preacher on youtube who’s content i might watch but

idk

i’m some kind of agnostic heavily leaning on Christian. idk what i’ll be in the future. i can say that i don’t intend for that to be a very consistent thing. like, i’m an anime blogger mostly that rbs anime titties. worst case scenario, maybe i follow a few more religious blogs i trust and occasionally rb something inbetween. i’m nmto changing my things entire content fo rthis...

just

you know. it’s something important to me, you know? something that events in my life (most notably being a near-death experience) are making me consider re-exploring. either nothing changes, or i can have a bit more peace of mind about my life and religion in general is all. it’s my blog and i don’t... appreciate asks like that about an aspect of my life i’m exploring again. ty for understanding

#i think ia cutally lost a few followers for that last night which.#actually. kinda really hurts. but oh well #about me

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ummidkego · 10 months

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⏩ If you're seeing/following this blog, you're either a) someone I trust enough b) a bot c) a person I reblogged from? d) wh.. who tf are you? 👁️👀? Did a keyword lead you here or... ?

⏩ This is a blog where I'm more unhinged and let my ego out, and am generally more open!

⏩ I don't tag cw/tws, and I don't rb/post graphic content at the same time.

⏩ I'm self-aware and try my best to make emotionally mature/healthy choices despite xyz/anything expressed on here.

⏩ Also, know that if I'm using a word wrong, I'm definitely likely to be (aware) unsure about that vs being oblivious. I don't feel like being that cautious when posting on here.

⏩ I know what cognitive distortions are. I don't care *here.*

⏩ My brain? I'm dx'd with a few things already, and I question some more (which could just be tendencies and overlaps). I might rb from blogs related to those.

⏩ Gonna use this as a collection of logs to look back at "later," and take note of thought and behavioral patterns.

⏩ I don't have this on private bc I sort of want to be seen? Please don't ask/point out mental health related concerns/etc. unless I know you.

🐙 22yrs + She/They!

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koujakubf · 2 years

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Whos grooming kids? wtf i wanna report their account

permission to post from enbynoizkinnie / ok to rb to spread the word !!

i have no issue calling out friends on their fucked up behaviour, and i don’t condone this shit at all. she isn’t a friend anymore and i now have her blocked out of respect to the victim. what jazz did was fucked up and i’ll quickly elaborate on the matter.

jazzthesapphicqueen (18) has been grooming and emotionally abusing enbynoizkinnie (16) for what i believe is the duration of their friendship. jazz likes to guilt trip and have this sad little pity party which is a manipulation tactic used to keep her victim in a self-doubting and intimidated state. she has inflicted a tremendous amount of trauma onto a minor and i think it’s time for people to become aware of jasmine’s behaviour so we can let this kid heal.

please keep in mind that enbynoizkinnie is only 16 and autistic, and individuals such as themself may fall victim to manipulative abusers because of their vulnerability. abusers such as jazz typically choose vulnerable people as their prey because they will be able to get away with a lot, and she has… until now.

screenshot from one of enbynoizkinnie’s posts:

jazz is perfectly capable of understanding how wrongful her actions were and should’ve known when to fuck off but she didn’t. and that says a lot about herself and the type of person she truly is.

another screenshot:

seriously jazz, if you left because of this then you’re a fucking coward. i don’t want to see you around at all, what you have done to this kid is fucking disgusting and please know that you’ve just lost many friends who trusted you. don’t fucking return.

this post just merely scratches the surface about jasmine grooming a minor, but you can read more on enbynoizkinnie’s blog. please send love their way but also give them space because i can’t imagine what they’re feeling right now. my heart goes out to them.

#ok to rb #my big brother instincts kicked in #literally woke up noiz-brainrot to show them jasmine’s bullshit she was our friend and we were livid #i have a 16 yo sibling and if anyone did this to them then i’d beat their ass so i have a lot of sympathy for this kid #jazzthesapphicqueen #dmmd #ask to tag

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djarrex · 3 years

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Hi everyone, just wanted to address what happened last night along with some other things from before that all tie in together.

There’s multiple parts to the following post - please make sure you read all of it if you’re gonna take the time to even start.

It was midnight and y'all were still jumping in on anon and telling me how I'm awful for not commenting, owning up, or taking responsibility - I should have been in bed. I have a life and job outside this app; and with the several of you in my inbox and it being too late at night to address each, I’m gonna do it now. I can’t not say something about all of this. I just can’t keep quiet and ignore the problem - it’s not fair to you all. Deleting one post already has you guys even more riled up and all I wanted to do was offer something better than a “half-hearted apology” (it was very late at night when I wrote that very short apology, and wanted a redo tbh).

I really didn't want to make a long post like this. I reached out to a select few on here because I care about them (there's more of you, but like I said, it was at the time after midnight and I was fucking exhausted). but I was being demanded for accountability. So here I am.

Allow me to be real with you all, if that's ok. If it's not, well, idk. First I wanna address all you anons, who, instead of speaking to me one on one about all this, want to criticize me and shame me and my writing when truthfully it feels like you haven't even read more than a handful of my work. I didn’t realize that I write the clones all the same way? That I always make them super aggressive and uncaring and dom? “you write every single clone as so dominant instead as unique individual men with their own personalities” Interesting. See, that right there tells me you haven't read nearly enough of my stuff for me to believe that's true. That's one accusation I absolutely will not back you on because I know it’s inaccurate - saying how I group the clones into some overly-aggressive, and uncaring category - that I always write all of them as mean in bed because they're men of color. And hey, if I do write rough smut - which yeah, it's out there and I write it, as do a lot of you - there are warnings at the beginning, aftercare, dialogue, reader sharing their feelings, and most importantly... consent between the two. That’s what warnings are for, so that you know what you’re going to be reading. That’s why I, as we all do, appreciate warnings listed at the tops of fics; honestly, write them sub or dom or switch or however you want but don’t come at me like that. I’m sorry if I'm coming across as rude because I'm usually not, I’m one of the nicest people you’ll meet, but I will not stand idly by while you chastise my writing (writing that is pretty much the same type of stuff a lot of you write & rb with the same characters) that you haven’t read enough of to back such claims.

Next: Sincerely, from the bottom of my heart,

I get it. Really, I do. I fully understand the problem of whitewashing in SW along with almost everywhere else, and I do not agree with it. It's a huge problem, and it needs to be rectified. Now just because I don't speak publicly about it and opt out of publicly shaming TBB, doesn't mean that I agree with what’s going on. Not everyone is comfortable with sharing their opinions on a subject, no matter what that subject is or which side they're on. You live and you learn when it comes to that.

It has never been my intention to fetishize POC in my writing, which btw, the same people who are saying that it is my intention are the ones claiming I portray all of the clones as the same, aggressive men, lacking their individuality. It’s a claim that is simply not true, and I know I have followers on here to back me up on that. I know what I've written; how about you check it out and tell me that you don't see the words "soft" or "fluff" or "cuddling" or “gentle” or “tender” within my work linked in my ML. Clone character being a good partner and father? Tender love making? Holding each others faces in their hands? “We/you survived” sex? Taking care of their partner? Saying “I love you” to one another? Confirming the safe word and going slow at first? Oh my - riveting and harsh stuff - totally unacceptable.

Now: My admittedly problematic writings of Rex + Zygerria,

I went into writing that rp fic totally unaware and unknowing of the true implications. For that, I sincerely apologize. When I posted the NSFW alphabet, that’s when I was called out on that rp fic - not when I first posted it. Which the timeline doesn’t matter, I know that, but it concerns me a little bit that no one spoke up about it sooner - letting me dig myself deeper into a hole that I didn’t realize I was inside of in the first place. I've apologized once, and I know that doesn't negate what happened; I acknowledged my mistake back then, but I suppose that wasn’t good enough. I had asked you, anon, to message me to give me guidance, to teach me on what to do about the fic - you stayed hidden. Well, respectfully, what the fuck? I know we're all adults but don't lecture me and avoid me when I’d literally reached out for guidance on how to properly rectify the issue. I fixed my wording in some of my fics (the things I’ve caught upon rereading them) because I recognized and more importantly learned about and from my mistakes along with the unintentional negative implications of how I wrote those characters. Some of y'all wanna tell me that I "haven't learned"? Who are you, my personal blog police? My professor? My life coach? Are you even my friend? If I'm wrong and haven't learned, then fucking educate me. I worked hard on that rp fic, just like I do with a majority of what I write, but it doesn’t matter because I will delete it knowing that it’s harmful to others and I apologize for inadvertently romanticizing slavery with what I wrote - it was unintentional, and I’m truly sorry to those who have been hurt by it. I know it’s wrong, and there’s no proper excuse for it. Can’t go back in time, but consider it gone now.

Since that first wakeup call, I’ve been working hard to ensure I avoid using certain words and ideas when describing the clones in my fics. If there’s still something you see that isn’t correct or is inappropriate, please tell me! Don’t hold it in but then jump on the “attack M” bandwagon. Private message me, or come peacefully off or on anon, there will be no hard feelings. I don’t mind being corrected when I make a mistake - that’s just part of life, we all make mistakes and we live and learn from them. Making mistakes doesn’t = scumbag human. When you hold your breath and choose not to take the time to guide me, and if I appear to still be making the same mistakes, well, idk. I’m telling you right now that I do not mind if you message me with the good intention of pushing me in the right direction. When you come at me with hostility on anon, well, no thank you. To the anons that came without rage: thank you! I read what you wrote, and I have a better understanding as to how my writing had hurt the lovely followers of mine, and tried to address as much as possible in this post. See, angry mob anons? It costs zero credits to be kind and offer up your thoughts and advice with a good heart. I’m not going to hate you or block you if you try to correct me. I don’t block unless you’re a snoopin’ minor. Just don’t hold a knife to my throat.

Now: Why did I delete the tags and then my response to that anon ask?

Simply put: I felt awful. Deleting it doesn’t immediately mean I’m hiding from it and ignoring the issue. I wanted to come up with a better apology, explanation, whatever you wanna call it, because my followers deserve that. The ones who enjoy my work, the ones who interact, the ones who I call my friends, the ones who know that I’m a good person. Didn’t want to leave the tags/post floating around all night, giving more people time to sharpen their pitchforks and join the mob while I attempted to sleep. Trust me, I know saying that I had no ill intentions when tagging that post doesn’t make it better nor does it make it go away. I’m just trying to show you my point of view, that I knew immediately how I should not have tagged it that way, so that’s why I deleted them. I corrected my mistake. But y’all are too fucking quick I swear.

One more thing:

I know some of you who had called me out with the passive-aggressive inbox messages are still following me, and for what? You don’t like what I post, which is why one would follow another in the first place, so why bother sticking around? Do you feel like you need to police my blog? You want to be there the literal minute I make a mistake? I’m gonna turn off anon for a bit, so if you wanna discuss, message me. Just know that if you’re going to come at me with knives out, I probably won’t reply to you.

To conclude:

I’m sorry. Truly sorry for the entire Rex + Zygerria outfit + slaver ordeal with both the fic from a while ago and then the tags from last night. We can’t go back in time; the only option is to correct past mistakes that are able to be corrected, and then move on with new knowledge that’ll aid in me working even harder to ensure my writing isn’t inappropriate or offensive, and doesn’t hurt my followers nor the characters I write for. I’m still going to write self-indulgent filth and fluff, post-order 66 Rex, and other misc shit. I enjoy writing fanfic, as I know a lot of you enjoy reading what I write and love to talk to me about it. I hope that this didn’t come off as me being a bitch, because I’m really not. I enjoy interacting with the handful of people on here that I’d call my friends, and I love reading your reactions and tags to my fics when you’re excited and/or horny (LOL). It’s just after lunch time where I’m at, so I hope you have a great rest of the day/night/morning whatever for wherever you are.

#long post #m personal

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kanmom51 · 3 years

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I hope you don’t mind me sending this as I love yoir blog and the way you approach things and I had a downer today. As someone who has similar views as many of you on here when it comes to KM e.g not believing everything and being rational but also having life exp which strongly suggests KM are something special etc, I recently saw an adorable video from 2017 MMA which I hadn’t seen before where 2 things were pointed out aka JK singing about a first kiss to JM and Jin smiling and then JK smiling at JM across the room at words in the background that said “do you want to start our love again”. It has all been debunked as it was all about JK’s crush on the idol IU. She was the one singing and both moments were related to her as JK idolised her and the boys were teasing him a lot through the whole MMA 17 and JK was enamoured all evening. I instantly felt foolish because now I think “am I just being stupid” when it comes to jikook? I see a lot of love and affection there but I just felt like maybe were seeing what we want to see rather than accepting there’s nothing romantic there? And if they’re extra close and they’re “brothers” as people keep banging on about then I’m always happy for them as they both deserve tons of happiness but I just feel like one day we will get a rude awakening and all of the things we’ve held dear will be proven to be fantasy. I am rational to know the difference between shipping and supporting but part of me struggles with the latter as I learn about some moments that aren’t actually as we see them, they’re proven to be something different. Sorry for being a downer but your blog provides a lot of comfort so I sought you and a few other precious bloggers out ❤️

Hey anon. I’m happy you reached out, because it helps to talk to others when you feel insecure, no matter what the issue may be - Jikook related or anything else that causes you stress.

I will start by saying this:

I am a whole hearted Jikook supporter. I believe that JK and JM are very close, I believe they have a special connection, I believe they are romantically involved.

These are my personal beliefs, that are based on my initial gut feeling and a hell of a lot of original content viewing. This is my opinion.

I am fully aware that there are many that think otherwise, and I am fully open to hear what they have to say and assess it objectively. But I don’t have any patience for stupidity (sorry for being so blunt). When nay sayers come up with unsubstantiated shit, it ticks me off.

So, my advice to you is:

don’t let yourself be swayed so easily by others. Be strong in your belief. Yes, check yourself from time to time, it’s healthy. But don’t let others sway you so easily.

“I recently saw an adorable video from 2017 MMA which I hadn’t seen before where 2 things were pointed out aka JK singing about a first kiss to JM and Jin smiling and then JK smiling at JM across the room at words in the background that said “do you want to start our love again”. It has all been debunked as it was all about JK’s crush on the idol IU. She was the one singing and both moments were related to her as JK idolised her and the boys were teasing him a lot through the whole MMA 17 and JK was enamoured all evening. I instantly felt foolish because now I think “am I just being stupid” when it comes to jikook?”

I think this is the moment you are referring to.

This whole story about JK’s crush, him ‘idolising’ her, being teased ‘all night’ etc. where did that come from? Did one of the members tell this story? If yes, where?

When you say “it has all been debunked”, that’s when I have an issue. Because, who ‘debunked’ it? Did the boys come out and explain the moment?

Hell no. You are actually relying on other fans that came up with this theory and have named it as factual, and let me guess, they are not Jikook supporters.

Go with your initial gut feeling. Look at the interaction between the two at that moment. Look at Jin’s reaction (smile, then wipes it off). JK is singing to JM. He is looking him in the eye. Jin looking at the interaction between the two and mouth curling up, but then remembers cameras around and goes back to neutral face. If this was about IU and not Jikook, why hide your smile? If this is about IU why sing to JM, why say those lines and look JM in the eye?

“as I learn about some moments that aren’t actually as we see them, they’re proven to be something different.”

How and when where those moments “proven to be something different”? that’s my question to you. To be proven doesn’t mean based on hearsay.

Every conclusion I come to is based on what I see with my eyes and what I hear with my ears. That is why, for example, I don’t trust the lip reading at MMA 2018. They might be true, but I can’t read lips or understand Korean, so no, I can’t base anything on that.

I also don’t do Tweeter, don’t believe gossip or theories that god knows where they started. I suggest you do the same. Believe your gut feeling. Watch original content, lots of it, the less it’s edited the better.

I know sometimes we can let ourselves be swayed by our insecurity. When this happens, when something undermines your belief, go back to the drawing board, and go over those moments that did make you believe.

Re-watch, rethink, and you will see how this will restore your belief, because there is soooo much out there with those two. It’s not about one moment. Not about one award show. It’s about a plethora of content that leads to that conclusion. Just go back to GCFT, GCFS, RB, MMA 2018. Listen to what JM and JK have to say themselves.

As I said, I believe in the connection between JK and JM, with all it entails. But if one day I will be proven wrong, so what? I love those two, they are gorgeous human beings, and all I wish for them is happiness, be it with each other or be it with someone else.

I am also aware that there is a very big chance that we will never really fully know the true nature of their relationship, them being part of such a traditional society, one that doesn’t look kindly on the LGBTQ+ community.

So, if one day we are proven wrong, then yes, it may make me question my detective abilities (that btw have been proven right over the years), but that’s it. I won’t be disappointed, because all I wish is for them to be happy. I support Jikook because I support JM and JK, and believing they are together, I support their connection, their love, and I think that most Jikook supporters, including yourself, feel the same. xx

#Jungkook #JK #Jimin #JM #Jikook #Jikook are real #Kookmin #KM #BTS #don't believe everything you hear #MMA 2017

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canarypoint · 3 years

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Hey! I hope your day is going well!

I saw your rb about wanting to date only women and nb people. If you’re not comfortable or simply just want to ignore this ask feel free to do it. Do you feel attracted to men but only want to date women/nb people or you’re just attracted to women and nb people?

When I was figuring out my sexuality I thought I couldn’t be a lesbian if I was still attracted to nb people, but once I discovered that lesbian means non-men attracted to non-men I felt more comfortable labelling myself as lesbian! When I identified as bi men made me uncomfortable with that label since they still thought I was attracted to them

hi! my day has been pretty okay, i got some writing done for a project i've been working on for a while that i was scared of losing interest in, and i'm currently catching up on the flash, so i'm doing pretty good! hope you're day has been good, too!!

this got unnecessarily long so i'm just adding a cut for anyone who doesn't want to read it, so it's easier to scroll past lol

i'm completely okay with answering that, and i wanna make sure anyone reading this knows that i'm always open to discussing labels and sexualities (assuming it's appropriate/not offensive/the obvious stuff lol), so i'm always here for that! as for your question, i'm actually not sure?

like don't get me wrong, yes i can see that men are (at the very least aesthetically?) attractive. i mean just look at grant gustin (lol sorry again, watching the flash s7 so he's kinda on my mind rn). but am i attracted to them in that way? i'm not really sure...

i've had "crushes" (i'm using that term loosely rn) on guys before. sometimes multiple guys at once... but i've never been in a relationship with anyone, and i know that sometimes i can confuse romantic feelings with platonic feelings? (or at least that's what i did when i first started discovering i was attracted to more than just the opposite gender/sex, i don't know which word to use, sorry about that).

as for the other kind of attraction that i will not mention on this blog at this time... i just don't know.

what i do know, is that i can't see myself dating a guy. i can't see myself going on dates or any of that sort of thing with one. a girl or a nb person (is there another term for that)? yes, definitely. so i know, that regardless of whether i'm bi or a lesbian or some other label, i prefer to not date men.

but overall? yeah, i'm just not sure, and i'm not sure how to figure it out.

it's to a point where i can't even read fics about male character(s) x reader, unless it's a poly relationship with a woman involved (like for example, i can read buckynat x reader, but i can't read stucky x reader, if that makes sense?). but even then, i find myself struggling to focus on the parts centered around bucky (or whoever the male character is) and reader.

sorry, this probably wasn't the answer you were looking for at all, but it's the best i can give. feel free to reply if you want (trust me i'm more than okay with it), or if anyone else reading this wants to join in, i don't mind!

#anon ask #keep sending me asks!#i have another tag like that but without the exclamation mark??#i don't need tws for this post do i?#if i do please tell me slkdhglsf #i hope it made sense #my thoughts are kinda jumbled #and i got dizzy halfway thru writing it??#that's not important everyone ignore that #i probably just need water #speaking of everyone reading this go drink water ily #also yeah i'm afraid of telling a guy i'm bi and then him being like #'oh well i still have a chance'#but also ew who would wanna date me lmao #answering asks is so anxiety-inducing wtf

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weaselbeaselpants · 4 years

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I have a lot to say and not enough time to say it. It hurts, but ya’ll know what this is about so if you want my full fandom retrospective opinion thing guys, here.

I’ve been following Vivienne’s art and career since I found her on dA in 2009. I’ve basically grown up with her and have a wide range of opinions up and down her collective work. I must stress that I do not know her as a person and no matter how critical I get in my personal time if I somehow met her in real life or converse with her online again (like, back in the day we went back and forth. She was pretty nice to me), I’d be humble and congratulate her for her success.

Critique does not, EVER equate to attacking people.

But

the reason I don’t call myself a VivziePopVivzmind-fan is the exact same as to why I don’t like the proud use of ‘anti’. Let me try and explain -

The vast majority of Viv fans are just that: fans. Viv’s one of their favorite artists and they’re happy for her and obviously defensive when some mouth breather pops into their fan discussion calling her and all of them trash. Quite a lot of the Hazbin fans I know in my circle of friends are all pretty accepting and agree on the problematic notions and implications of her work.

HOWEVER, there’s a vocal minority in the VivziePop fandom that were and still are toxic. Their specific interest in Viv back in the day was toxic...and now that she’s moved on into a successful career I doubt they’ve gone away, considering the things I’ve heard. These people - they’d flood Viv’s comments sections and stuff with messages like they were talking to her when they weren’t and they’d unironically call her a god in a way that feels like gaslighting, ex: “I’ll NEVER be as good as you Viv! My art is just sooooo unpopular oh god you are incredible no one will ever like you as much as meeeee”. It made me uncomfortable. It made me not want to be around her because these people took Viv’s role in their lives so seriously and their demand for her attention...it struck a nerve.

These same fans have been around long enough to see actual shitlords - the likes of Kiwifarms and tapatalk wikis - come in and actually harass Viv. Viv’s been sent revenge porn by sick freaks who think they’re funny and believe she deserves it. No. In my non-name fan bystander opinion, Viv’s got some shit to work on, but no one deserves raperevenge porn. EVER. It was genuinely bad and yes Viv and her base have every reason to NOT TRUST these communities. Unfortunately, when these incidents happened, these particular fans took it upon themselves to gatekeep the fandom and act like Viv’s unofficial guard against any kind of decenting opinion of her, all without her say so.

((to the critics who will be all “but Viv or Faust said THIS to their fans-”, like I said, Viv’s far from perfect but regardless of how much she prolly wanted people to side with her I’m gonna guess that she didn’t want people sending transphobic death threats to DollCreep. Again, and this is coming from a bystander here, I have a feeling Viv knows about some of the toxicity but doesn’t know how/want to address it - which is a conversation all it’s own.))

This particular breed of VivziePop “fan” holds so much toxicity in her fandom(s). They aren’t the only cause, but they’re there. They feel entitled to her attention and her approval. They creep me out. Having spoken to other much-less critical admitted fans of Viv around me, these fans appear to creep everyone else out and put the rest of the fandom on edge. They’re gatekeepers. They’re creeps. Like the bronies and SU fans of yestertodayyears, they know harassment exists and that people have crossed the line - so they think any means is necessary to prevent that is automatically good. I could pile together all the incidents and folks who’ve had bad runs ins with this aftershock of Viv-obsession, but I do have a life of my own and this post is already stupid long so I’ll just list out the biggest examples and provide receipts when asked.

Critical blogs have gotten RAPE and death threats because they don’t like Viv’s art. HonestZoophobiaCriticisms, a blog I interracted with back in the day, def got one. Now Viv’s opinion of crit-blogs is that they’re “bad takes” but I can assure you she doesn’t want that shit being said on her behalf.

I’ve seen young artists get blacklisted from sites and forums cause they so much as post a redesign. Viv and co get told through the grapevine that someone’s making hatespeech and so preemptively block said person (prolly cause they’re in the middle of WORKING and can’t deal right now) only to find out after the fact that no, it was just a kid drawing their version of her characters. There’s serious miscommunication issues within the fandom about who’s ‘good’ or ‘bad’ and once you get the actual staff involved in this game of telephone you’re begging for trouble. The problem acknowledged, however, it’s souly from the “Viv never did anything wrong camp”. No word is said about how ugly the fandom is under the surface it’s all one type of person’s fault and not complicated’. Blah

I’ve only ever had ONE obsessive ‘fan’ who’d stalk me, mock me, and then redraw my art just to get attention from me. That shit fucked with my head. As a follower hundreds of miles away from Viv who’s agreed/disagreed with her through the years - I absolutely believe her when she says she hates ‘creeps’ and that she doesn’t want anyone in her fandom spreading hate on her behalf. It’s the one thing about her I’m POSITIVELY sure of. Whether she believes that said underlying harassment exists and/or is even a problem within her fandoms is anyone’s guess. That’s not what I’m here for. I’m here to write stupid blog entries like this, talk about fandoms and media and how they and the real world affect one another, and rb fan art I like. I’m cautiously optimistic fan with a side of salt.

Mixed opinions and critique within a fandom CAN and SHOULD exist. Hazbin Hotel has been greenlit by a studio! It has a product line of merchandise you buy. Helluva Boss is getting eight more episodes this coming year (yeeee:3yeeee). Two of Viv’s properties are now products. Nothing is immune from critique. And in critique you will find a lot of people who are not ‘nice’. Critique or analysis doesn’t have to be nice. There will be, in Viv’s words’ ‘bad takes’ on her writing. Maybe they will be actual CinemaSins-styled bad takes or maybe Viv is just mad that people don’t love and feel inspired by her characters the way she wants them to - it’s a fact she’s going to have to get used to.

((TBH, I’m pretty sure she’s already realized that criticism of all types need to exist. It’s just that, again, her and the SpindleHorse staff are kind of overwhelmed by all matter of takes and opinions coming their way they kinda can’t deal weeding out the fair ones from the assholes, so she lumps them all together.))

Shitposters, ironic fans, unironic fans, critical fans, just critics of Hazbin and Helluva CAN and WILL exist. They should exist and not feel threatened by the megafandom. There are people out there who are one step further and rightfully bothered by Hazbin/Helluva’s use of incorrect symbols, portrayal of certain topics, and the response by creators. These people have strong opinions and are actually disgusted by Viv. They deserve to exist too and should not be vilified because, like me, they’re commentary doesn’t consist of anything personal towards the people at Spindlehorse or the fans of her works. They can rant, they can be professional, they can be petty and they can be fair. But they will exist. You have to deal with it.

I am an ADD/OCD ridden autistic woman with serious anxiety issues who has no one to talk to half the time and so only HAS my fandom to communicate with. But that’s just it - it’s a fandom. A community. You have to learn to not think souly of yourself and of others in a community. A fandom doesn’t exist just for you or any one person. You have the right to be angry and defend or be offended. And it’s in the spirit of that that I ask, prrraaaaaay even, that I please

NOT BE CALLED AN “ANTI-ANTI” for not liking the moniker?!

I DON’T TO BE AN “ANTI”. Not ironically, not unironically. ‘Anti’ should be for politics and shit like pedophiles, necrophiles, nazis, serial killer stans, Trump, racists, antisemites, terfs, animal abusers, rapists, and antivaxxers. Anti should only come into critical media analysis when these ethical issues follow suit IN TO fandom discussion. ((EX: Anime and MLP proudly waving their cp and non-con into the public eye; Hazbin appropriating cultural symbols which are not satanic; Basically anything that concerns John K or Butch Hartman.))

If your DNI list unironically consists of the entirety of one fandom: CONGLATURATIONS! You have done the exact same thing these particular creepy Viv fans have done: monopolize the conversation. And yes, people I’m referring to, IT’S STILL A PROBLEM EVEN IF YOU’RE FIGHTING RACISM/SEXISM/HOMOTRANSPHOBIA.

There are hundreds of Vivziefans who ARE more critical, accepting of faults, interested in discussion and especially rewrite and redesign stuff who would LOVE to engage with you and give you a follow. There’s hundreds of people who no doubt agree with you!

But the thing I’ve seen these very proud AntiHazbinVivzieHelluvaWhatever blogs do is lash out at fans for continuing to like Viv and consume Viv’s art in a healthy way. What the actual fuck is your problem?

I get it. Say a crazy Hazbin fan gets on your case for even SUGGESTING Viv could be homophobic ((”SHE’SBIANDWORKSWITHGAYPPLblahablahblah”)). They get in your face, make some callouts, try to rile up support against you, leave disgusting harassment throughout your social media? Absolutely ban worthy. After that it’s perfectly understandable why you don’t want to engage with anything HHHBZPVivzierelated because you’re so fucking tired of being labeled an abuser or “just jealous” for having an opinion on a show you don’t like. I’m with you!

But,

A fan agrees that something in the canon is bad or that Viv did something they don’t like?

A fan likes your silly shitpost meme?

A fan asks if they can like Hazbin and follow you at the same time?

A fan does fan art of something you don’t like?

If your response to any of these ^^^ things is to get LOUD and accusatory, Vivsplain them about how they’re an absolutely awful person to ever question YOUR opinion, or just block them without a second thought? You’re a petty, vendictive shit and you also need to learn to let things go. I’m sorry but you do. As I already said, Viv’s work is a brand at this point, not just the work of a singular person. As such, there are gonna be mixed opinions and you can’t judge every single one of these people by what they like. You’re a shitty critic with a shitty attitude and yes that will demean the value of what you’re saying. This is bad because, if you’re trying to point out how Angel Dust’s abuse IS handled terribly; gay rep in Viv’s work is weak and terrible; the show appropriates closed practices; the fandom makes excuses for predatory artists and creepy behavior and individuals who have sketchy pasts - I’M WITH YOU. WE NEED TO BE TALKING ABOUT THIS SHIT. JUST BECAUSE THESE ARE ADULT CARTOONS SET IN HELL MEANS THERE SHOULD BE ANYTHING CLOSE TO 2013 PONY-TUMBLR. <<<---- this shit is as important to me as it is to you and I really don’t like being called an abuser or apologist for saying “hey maybe blowing up at ppl for the shows they like ISN’T the way to go about this”.

But I have, just like the good old days of 2015 Zoophobia of yore, been blocked because I admit to being tired of ‘Anti’ being equated to ‘critical’. Same with hater.

Critical DOES NOT = Anti+Hater. I’m fucking tired of people saying it does and I’m tired of people taking up the term as some weird form of fandom reappropriation. It’s stupid.

Tl;dr: Once upon a time, I was in a budding fandom for something I liked made by an indie artist I watched on dA. I wanted to be a bigger fan than I was already, but was told by toxic people within said fandom that I couldn’t be part of it for reasons they’d made up in their head about my ‘motives’ against Viv. My admiration for Viv or what I liked about Zoophobia didn’t matter because I thought the story was really rushed and people weren’t being truthful with how they really felt about it - ergo, I HAD TO GO.

Flash forward 8 years later- My opinion of Viv’s body of work has changed but I still find myself in love with her style and some of her characters. I want to be on a forum or service that gives a healthy look at the problems there are with this series and fandom...and I’m met repeatedly by petty bs where people are again at each other’s throats. And yes, I do think it’s causing more harm than good especially when you insist there’s a “x person shouldn’t be trusted” mentality when fighting actual fucking racist, xenophobic, predatory bullshit.

#vivziepop #vivziepop critical #vivziepop drama #hazbin hotel #hazbin critical #hazbin hotel critical #critical hazbin hotel #anti anti #antis #anti hazbin hotel #cause I want both sides of this debaucle to see this and I'm tired #K?

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dumbassscout · 4 years

Text

i see a lot of 13 yr olds on tumblr these days, so id like to share some advice i wish i had known using tumblr at age 13.

this is also probably not an original idea from me lol, someone has got to have done this before. i would usually put this under a cut but ive decided not to for now

be aware that this site is like NOTORIOUSLY harmful. you may think you’re above it or too mature for it to hurt you, but trust me, you aren’t. since you will probably not be stopped by that warning, maybe take some precautions/keep some stuff in mind to stay safe.

i had tumblr savior for my first experiences with the site. im pretty sure it still works and it’s regularly updated, so take a look into that. it blocks posts with certain keywords from being seen on your radar, and can also push/allow posts with other keywords to always be shown. i would advise getting it or a similar extension to custom block triggering/harmful content.

don’t put other/more popular users in your fandom/community on a pedestal. they’re people behind a blog, just like you are. don’t feel intimidated by the people in your own community, they are just people the same way you are a person. they can mess up at times, and so can you.

making friends is a great thing on this site, but keep an eye on new online friends’ behaviors. it is exciting to meet new people, but you want to be aware of toxic friends. same goes for your mutuals. overall, keep people on this site at an arm’s length until you’ve gotten to know them enough personally to know that they’re genuine people. as you get older you can relax on this, but as a young teen it’s better to be hyperaware than to be blissfully ignorant as you get hurt.

onto more broad things, your theme doesn’t have to be perfect. you dont have to make a custom html/edited html website theme for your blog, you can leave it as tumblr default. if you enjoy organizing that, then by all means go ahead! but don’t feel like it is necessary for your blog, most of the time you will get a new theme set up and check on it on a month and find that it actually looks terrible to you. if you’d rather just have it as a basic/default site, then that is perfectly normal.

your blog’s theme/topic is your choice, and can be uniquely you. some people have many blogs for many things, just a few, or just one with everything. it is up to you how you want to do it! the themes you choose, topics, are up to you. fads and trends are cool but finding what works for you personally is way more fun. your blog is supposed to be fun. you are supposed to enjoy using tumblr. don’t compromise that for a trend. make your blog(s) however you want, however it pleases you. it can feel pressuring to have a perfect blog, but it’s better to just make your appearance the way it would make you happy.

also, tag systems are awesome! but they are not necessary unless you’re tagging trigger warnings. always tag those! but i know a lot of people have personal tagging systems to organize their blog, which is totally cool! but again, personal tag systems are not necessary, and if they feel unnecessary to you, don’t use them. but again, tag triggering content, especially if you are asked to.

archiving/deleting/creating new blogs is a whole other process. some people like to start with a clean slate every time they switch to a new fandom, and let their old user be archived or deleted. this is perfectly respectable (and probably the right thing to do) personally, i just switch my blog over to whatever im feeling that month and people can unfollow if they no longer enjoy my blog (i dont have that big of a following on this blog). it’s really a personal decision, and if you want to restart your blog you will know when to/if you want to.

reblog art, but never “repost” it. aka dont take the image and post it on your own blog, just reblog it from the original poster. its common sense but not everyone knows? idk

if you end up having some or many followers, make sure to check yourself. appreciate your followers, respect them. they are people with blogs. just like you. don’t let a high number inflate your ego way out of proportion, it’s easy to fall into that sense of power.

respect people’s pronouns. even if you for some reason have a disagreement with them, or you don’t understand why/how their identity works, just use the correct pronouns that they ask you to. it costs you zero dollars and zero cents, and is incredibly respectful

as a young teen, don’t get involved/let yourself get buried in tumblr-wide discourse. examples of this include the bi vs pan debate, flag discourse etc. most ppl who i know who were attentive to things similar to that at a young age ended up being affected negatively by it. pay some attention to what pertains to you and also pay attention to what you can identify as right or wrong, but don’t let people’s opinions on your dash influence you in times of discourse. go and look at both sides of those kinds of debates if you’re interested, and form an opinion from there.

speaking of which, sometimes people will just post their takes on literally anything and youll come across it. take everything with a grain of salt unless there is links to proof (if applicable, not always needed). sometimes bad takes just havent had someone to reblog and disprove yet.

speaking of discourse, there is always discourse on this site in every fandom, every community. form your own opinions always, but keep your moral compass in mind. don’t compromise your morals and sense of right and wrong to enjoy certain fan-media. if something seems off, it probably is.

people make mistakes, and if someone did something kind of shitty/had a terrible take/belief (not irredemably shitty, those ppl do not need ur attention) and they genuinely apologize for the shit they did and learn from it, move on. leave some shit in the past, holding grudges isnt good for your mental health and people change. but again, always take things with a grain of salt.

you dont need a high follower count to get traction on your posts. it might help, but you can have a low follower count with high interaction or a high follower count with little to know interaction. the best advice i have is to tag what it is relevant to, whether it’s a fandom, aesthetic, etc and people who regularly check those tags will find it.

if you ever get anon hate for some reason, just delete it from ur inbox n move on. ppl who send anon hate want to see you post it and respond to it. if they said some really really MEAN shit though, it may be best to talk to a friend about it for comfort, or take a break from tumblr for a hot min. most importantly, report it, close your ask box/change it to no anonymous asks.

if at some point you choose to voice your opinion about a highly debated topic at the time, be aware that people who disagree might attack you for it. be aware, and be safe about it.

a lot of people swear by xkit. i have never used it in my life, but from the looks of it, it makes using tumblr so much more bearable. it breaks sometimes with tumblr updates, but apparently it’s worth it. again, look into it, but it’s not necessary to use the site.

do niche shit. start sideblogs without a plan in mind. make aus, make art, make writing, or make nothing at all. reblog the things you love wherever you want them to be reblogged. comment on people’s creations if you love them, they probably would love to hear how much you enjoyed it. appreciate how wonderful the better part of this site is, enjoy the free access to view and appreciate others’ creations and ideas.

i would put a lot more on here, but i feel like 20 is probably too much already. if anyone has anything to add, definitely rb with ur addition

overall, do the things you love on here, keep yourself safe, and be respectful of others.

#i dont shut up

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sometownie · 4 years

Note

1, 4, 8, 20

Thank you so much for asking and Happy New Year! ♥

1. Favourite hood you’ve played this decade?

I’ve had a few major hoods this decade: RB Strangetown, Green Valley, Sometown and Whitewave. They’ve all played a part in my life and in me getting better and better at handling this game. I think this is a tie between Green Valley and Whitewave - Green Valley was a hood where I mostly focused on playing, and some of the most memorable families are from there! However, I currently love Whitewave more than any other hood I’ve had, during Whitewave I have found my love for simblr and this community and everything!

4. What creation this year (build, hood, original sim, writing, cc, art, photo-set, etc.) are you most proud of?

Already answered here!

8. How has your game’s aesthetic changed this decade?

Please refer to this post!

20. Something from the 2010s you want to talk about but never get to.

This is going to seem a little self-indulgent and personal, but I would like to talk about mental health.

I have had mental health issues ever since I think middle school, which means it has been more than 10 years now. I was bullied in school and some high school era “friendships” have left me with scars that don’t seem to heal. I have problems with black-and-white thinking, perfectionism, some sort of mood disorders and most likely some level of ptsd. I started my road to recovery two years ago, and I have been going to therapy for 1½ years now. I’m also on medication, which I’m not sure is right for me, and I have a doctor’s appointment later this month to figure out whether it should be changed towards something that treats bipolar.

My point here is that you can heal. A few years ago I didn’t think it was possible to have so many balanced days in a row for me. My moods went from extremely depressed to over-extatic every few days, but I thought it was normal. I just thought it was who I am, but it was also extremely difficult to get anything done. I have learned so many things about myself and about the human brain through my therapist, and I honestly don’t know why we aren’t taught these things in school. It took me this long to seek help, because I always thought I wasn’t really sick. I wasn’t as bad as some others were, I didn’t have symptoms every day. I was wrong, and I did need help.

I don’t think I will ever be completely healed, however. Some of my scars are so deep in my being that I will most likely live with them forever. But the point is that I can learn to live with them. I can learn to control my body and my mind and decide what matters and what doesn’t. It takes effort, and sometimes I don’t have the energy for it, and sometimes it seems hopeless and sometimes I feel like I’m never going to feel better, but then I wake up the next morning and I already feel a little better. Life goes on, and so do I.

Mental health is something that is in my mind all the bloody time. Which is why the first thing I think about from the last decade is exactly that: How I have suffered, survived and have begun to heal. I have had support, of course. I don’t know if I could’ve done any of this without the support of my girlfriend. I have severe trust issues especially towards friends, so for a long time my girlfriend was the only one I dared to talk about these things.

I think my mental healing also shows in the way I run this blog. I am not afraid of posting anymore, I dare to post my builds and decos that I am not entirely sure of, I sometimes hit ‘Post’ even when I’m not sure if the post is as perfect as it could be. And I talk more! It’s way easier today to just send asks to people or to comment on someone’s post. I know for some online relationships are something that helps when being social irl is difficult. But not for me - I have always feared talking online just as I have feared it in real life. And having been welcomed into the simblr community (even though I have been here for almost ten years lol) quite warmly this past year has definitely helped me along my way to healing.

Okay so this got way too long! I’m probably gonna regret writing this later, so this is a message for the future me: DON’T DELETE THIS POST.

#challenge tag #personal #dreadpirate #i hope this didn't get too personal #i could've made a separate post #lol i forgot the links at first

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jadecringecomp · 5 years

Text

it took me the longest time to realize this, but jade had only befriended me for self validation abt their abuser, broden. i have screenshots and further information under the cut.

i initially befriended jade after they informed me broden was worse than he had made himself out to be. and so i proceed to block him off everything i had him on. soon after, me and jade became close. however, jade was... incredibly weird abt it regarding broden and would constantly point out how they ‘stole’ me from him. i can only show screenshots to show what i mean.

“[jade] LOL i was going thru brodens whining tag again

[image from broden’s blog reading “You, Jade, are worse than evil. Worse than a cyberbully, even. Rae is blocking me because of you and your so-called ‘act of justice’ against me. Well you know what? You’re the monster made by your own heinous ambition, slowly abusing me to death with threats and insults towards me.”]

[jade] now we’re best friends lol die mad freak

[jade] ‘worse than evil’ takes ur friends anyway”

“broden you know that even if me and rae werent friends they’d still hate you lmao”

“’lose/lose’ idk man im the one who gained a bunch of awesome friends who support me....and you have none....”

“[screenshot of a post from broden reading “There is also no reason to include anyone else in this situation besides you, your boyfriend and me. Nobody else, not even Rae, should’ve gotten involved with this situation.”]

broden you can’t get mad at ME after i gave you like dozens of chances to stop being a piece of shit before outing you to the people you were lying to. and you literally cannot get mad that rae (and everyone) fucking hates you now because you literally make no effort in any of your friendships! anytime anything happens you just completely give up and throw yourself a pity party like ‘well i guess this is goodbye’ or something and put absolutely 0 effort into fixing any of your relationships so the only person you have to blame for the fact you have no friends is yourself. also me and rae are best friends now are u mad? sorry i helped one of your victims broden. die mad about it.”

“broden im sorry im so much fucking better than you, have an amazing boyfriend who loves me and super awesome friends who are funny and i have fun with and dont abuse and that im actually likable as a person“

“if im just stirring up old drama and youre just some innocent uwuwu then why do i have so many friends and support from them and you’re all alone bc youre repulsive...”

“broden are you mad i exposed you to your friend and now we both validate each other as victims of you and i’m a better friend than you could ever dream to be“

“[screenshot from brodens blog reading “anonymous said: so like...why do you hate abuse survivors tho” broden responding “You may be an abuse survivor but it doesn’t give you the right to be abusive. I don’t hate you, I’m disappointed that you are not able to be something else than the thing that you hate. You gazed into the abyss, and the abyss gazed into you... I’m sorry.”]

[jade] this is so fucking edgy like shut the fuck up and stop shitting on abuse survivors you fucking idiot. why dont you explain to @gravecores and @pyjuumun how we’re idiots for standing up to our abuser and how that somehow makes US abusive. fuck off.”

even putting posts i made abt the broden situation into their broden tag which broden does go through (#b)... and sure i did give them permission to rb these but the fact they threw some of this into a tag they have dedicated to broden and they know he sifts through says a lot.

“[me] broden, to me: jade said it wrong i actually only rped rape and pedophilia many years ago

broden, right now on his blog: rping rape and pedophilia

[jade] broden: says fucking anything

me: *fucking sorting through all the proof of himself digging his own fuckin ass grave* mhmmmm go on go on”

“broden… the themes you do in your threads are extremely explicit and to me its genuinely hilarious how you try and excuse your fetishes with “but its fictional!!!!!!” and. its not the fact you rp those themes that makes her call you an abuser. theres so much more to that. the fact you want to sit there and type out how someone is involved in incest and how exactly someone is raped just shows to me that it isnt just some story plot or whatever. if you have the balls to sit there and type that out, it shows me you have rape and incest as some sort of fetish.

trust me broden if it were just mentions here and there i wouldnt think much of it. but in your story ive seen the incest and pedophilia being normalized and ive seen you type out in detail how someone is raped. im begging you to please realize that can only show you have all of these as a fetish or kink or whatever. again, if they were just mentions here and there i would think nothing of it.

broden im literally on my knees and BEGGING for you to realize that your actions are speaking so much louder than your words. ik you like to think jade is on your ass for “fictional rp themes” but! she has a valid reason to be + all the other things youve done to her! im sorry broden you are just. not in the right in this case.”

“[me] idk what kinda fuckshit is making ppl believe “oh yeah the victim is now being the abuser” but im almost sure its because ppl have no idea how abuse works.

[jades tags] #hm i would die for you? #b”

theres probably more to it, but i think you could get the gist of it. jade befriended me for nothing more than self validation and using me to take jabs at our abuser and it really fucking shows. after all during our friendship all they would talk abt was him. we barely had any normal conversations. if it wasnt abt broden, it was abt smth else that was bothering them. so go figure.

so before jade wants to throw out there that i was a fake friend for making a single mistake they never even allowed me to apologize for, maybe they should think this over abt how they used me to get back at their abuser.

#i didnt see this as callout post worthy but #its still real shitty so im just making an entirely different post

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thedogsled · 6 years

Text

Hi anonymous gencest person in my inbox! First of all, I wanted to reply to you thoroughly, I just happened to not be online at the time that you sent your first message, and as a result it’s taken a little time to write this reply. You seem to be really hurt by this, but the tone of your message is understanding and kind, and you deserve to be spoken to with the same respect that you did in your messages to me. I’ve put your message under the cut to protect you a little bit (I hope that you find it).

For the folks on my dash, please don’t think this is me jumping back into it. Mostly that’s because, as you mentioned in your message, I feel like everything has gotten very out of hand. The tone of the original conversation changed underneath me, because while my issues were only with tagging, I feel like some people perceived it to be something else. I’d like to clear that up. Ad hominem attacks are always unnecessary, and they derail reasonable conversation. I also think that a lot of this jumped off the back of already raised tensions and preconceptions, and the divisions in fandom are wholly responsible for that. So that’s mostly why I haven’t mentioned it on my blog since the scuffle happened, and why I’m happier putting the rest of this under a cut. I don’t agree with what this turned into (kink shaming, and making genfic people into some sort of commodity to be shot across the battlefield like human cannons), and it’s left a bad taste in my mouth how the whole thing was handled, much as it seems to have done with anonymous.

This post is about that.

Anonymous said:The gencest wank is reaching new levels. Now people on twitter are claiming that participants "support child abuse" (which child?) and are "grooming" other people. There is disagreeing with the ambiguity the term gencest imply and there is straight up calling content creators who just want to write on their favorite characters predators. Now I feel even worse about writing Winchester Gen fic and I'm not even a participant! Are yall even going to care about that?

Anonymous said:(same g*ncest wank anon) Look, nevermind. I dont really expect anything. I was hurt by both sides when I'm at a low point and just wanted to write some S&D gen fic to cheer me up. I came to vent but it wasn't called for. I'm sorry. Have a nice day.

I’m going to start right back at the beginning. This wank started on Twitter, and it’s still continuing over there. I think a lot of the reason why things are never let go of on Twitter is because the format has a toppling effect. With things only loosely dated, and Twitter sending you notifications for things you might have been interested in, it tends to keep fires burning a lot longer. The viciousness of the conversations is one of the reasons why I’m not a very big presence of Twitter myself, not to mention block and let block isn’t considered to be a social default. People just engage with material no matter the consequences, forgetting that other people on the internet are living breathing emoting human beings.

Part of it, too, is Supernatural fandom’s divisions in general. If you look just at the wank that crossed my dash just in the last week - one week! - there’s the gencest wank, wank from old meta writers about new meta writers, wank at people who wish Cas had been in this episode, wank about Danneel--it never ends. And instead of those wanks being considered as separate incidents, they instead build one on top of another, so people come into conversations with a lot of baggage, which they aim at each other in quickfire succession.

It’s not okay. That’s part of the reason why I try and avoid engaging in ‘antis do this, antis do that’ drama, fandom dividing into sides etc. because it’s draining, it’s tiring, and it stops you from doing things you want to be doing. Trust me, I know all about the pain of just wanting to write/draw/reblog so and so, and feeling like you can’t because the fandom is a trash heap. Other multishippers feel the same way, like they can’t reblog content from certain bloggers because it’s only going to cause drama. I haven’t written or drawn anything but Destiel (apart from that one Sabriel fic for the RB last year) since I started this blog, despite being a multishipper at heart myself, because I don’t feel like that content is welcome or will be engaged with.

This fandom cultivates that kind of unwelcomeness, in my opinion, to almost everyone in it. It also prevents people from blogging on their own blog, because again people feel they need to seek out and engage with content (even untagged content) that they disagree with, or they’re not interested with, instead of just blocking it. I like talking about ships, and I like discussing how problematic some of them are. I like discussing dark fic. I like discussing tagging practices, and how to keep people safe from being triggered in a fandom which is full of people carrying their traumas with them. While I like engaging with the dark potential of characters, I do my best not to do so at the expense or harm of others. All of those things lead to conflict, and conflict I avoid so much I don’t end up using my blog as I want to. For example, just last year I got involved in a Megstiel conversation which ended in people saying rude things about me and wearing it as a badge of honor that I blocked them. I like Megstiel. I have RPed it and I like the potential the two characters have with each other. It’s not my OTP, and I’m not a relentless wave of positivity about it, but that’s okay. That’s my opinion, and not an opinion I should have to defend, and it’s okay to block people rather than argue needlessly and spread ill feeling around even more.

Staying out of other people’s opinions didn’t happen, this time. Blocking didn’t happen (the gencest mod did use her block later on, which I wholly support, when I was still following the drama, but the block wasn’t respected. When people log out to get around blocks, it isn’t respectful, and it’s part of what fans the drama higher). Not to mention all this drama came in at peak level because all this fandom is is Us Vs. Them until everyone is in a frenzied final battle situation during every incident. Sometimes the drama is being exacerbated and misrepresented, and there are absolutely trolls trying to stir the other thing to being much worse than it is “for fun”. Fandomwank and the anon comms on Dreamwidth (formerly LJ) and to a certain extent Reddit, love making Tumblr and Twitter fans go at each other, and even if we’re pretty shitty with each other already, that’s being driven and exacerbated constantly by forces unseen.

(Note: People may accuse me of making this up, I suppose, but we’re a powderkeg and people love to start fires. The fake Cas stan on Twitter from this summer is a GREAT example of this, they had Misha’s name in their URL and dropped shit on the writers and cast for a long time just to make people froth at the mouth “How could they say that to Jared” etc. I think people really underestimate how much rubberneckers love drama, and if there isn’t any they will happily start it. That said, a fair amount of drama starts organically, and I’ll concede as much, but if you think cackling supervillains are crazytalk let me introduce you to MS Scribe...)

Rambling about drama aside, because I’m quite passionate about how stupid this fandom gets, I want to get back to your ask. I haven’t touched your actual comments yet, and that does a disservice to them because this drama has genuinely hurt you. Fandom should know that. Their words hurt real people. The bickering hurts real people. It drives people away. It drives people I know away, and it’s hurting this anon as well. It’s like anon says: are we going to care about that? Because we should. We should be making this fandom a better place. We should be mending bridges, not distancing people and telling them their pain doesn’t matter. It matters. At least it matters to me. I want you to know that, anon.

That it matters, that’s why I got so passionate about the tagging issue. We should care for everyone’s comfort in this fandom, and that matters to me too. We shouldn’t shout names at each other. And maybe if people hadn’t been at a default level of at each other’s throats, we could have had a conversation about this. I honestly believe the gencest mod came at this from a reasonable position originally, with no ill intent. I may not have made that clear in my previous posts, but I was determined to give them the benefit of the doubt. I don’t think their definition was even that wrong, given that they weren’t trying to redefine the brodependency, imo. My issues only came from a need for fandom itself to invoke the terms Wincest and incest where necessary to protect the people who seek protection from those terms, who are harmed by it, and blacklist it. So that their blacklists work, and continue to protect them. That’s okay, I think, to ask for that, not at the exclusion of the gencest tag, but alongside it where it’s necessary. Incest isn’t what the exchange is about, as I understand it, but obviously the inclusion of ‘wincest’ in the portmanteau does make the real intent cloudy, and excludes people who might otherwise have been interested in it. You mentioned in your ask that the term was ambiguous, and that was my only issue with it, not whatever it’s gotten turned into, especially if that negativity is explicitly anti-Wincest. If the mod wants to use a term that invokes incest for her non romantic gen fest, then that’s the mod’s prerogative. Re. tagging, I think it matters, but tagging is different to the challenge. I’ve tried to be clear on the difference I feel about it since the beginning.

I think that when you are inside the bubble of a ship, it becomes difficult to see the issues with that ship. Let’s take it outside of the fandom and look at Buffy, for example. The fair and honest truth is that Spuffy is an abusive ship. It was literally abusive, then framed as love, Joss Whedon’s gross projection of being able to creepily stalk women and do whatever he wants to them because ~love~ and the woman will ultimately forgive him for being a ruthless monster and they’ll get together. (coughMarvelcough). It’s my OTP for Buffy, but it is what it is. In SPN fandom, Wincest has a similar problem, because it’s been around right since the beginning of the show, and there’s some people I feel who have forgotten that it’s an incest ship, you know, and forget that other people don’t say “It’s just incest” in real life. Only on the internet. (The response to poor Jason Fisher’s defense of Superwiki from the GA made that disconnect really clear to me. The GA literally have no idea why this show would defend incest, because how we speak about incest within fandom is wholly different to how it’s discussed in the real world.)

That said, boy oh boy. I’m about to open a whole other can of worms here.

Wincest folks get constantly attacked. Like I said, it’s an incest ship, and between the GA and people who are triggered by it and purity culture, you’ve got these people who just wanna write their ship and they’re constantly on the toe of everyone’s boot getting a right kicking. I’m not going to argue about the moral rights and wrongs of writing incest, because it’s none of anyone’s business. Writing incest isn’t a gateway drug to performing it any more than if you write stories about murder that’s what you’re setting up to do next yourself. No matter why someone writes it, generally speaking that’s between them and their catharsis. People get uppity about other people’s ships and kinks when they should stay in their own lanes, really.

Tagging is the key to that. Acknowledging your ship has issues and then making sure you tag those issues responsibly. That’s important. It protects us. It protects me when I write darkfic. It protects people who write darkfic because they’re survivors, and helps people to deal with those things when it’s tagged properly, when it’s given the name of what it is, rather than sanitized. That’s my issue with gencest as a tag (not as a fest), because it felt like sanitized incest. You need to call that what it is. You need to identify it. Your older brother climbing into bed with you naked and without permission isn’t gen. To some people within the ship, the identification of it is half the battle. When we tag considerately, we are being kind to people we don’t know, as well as protecting ourselves. Tags make fandom better and safer.

With the way things have unrolled, it’s made it so engaging in either fest seems like picking sides. That’s not okay. That’s not just this battle; this is just another casualty of the whole ship war, something which has sucked the fun out of many things people enjoy doing, and driven many many people out of fandom. I’m sorry that this one hit when you were already feeling so low, not least because we all deserve to have nice things. Fandom is supposed to be the place to go to when life is shitty, to give you fun and relief. It’s not meant to feel like getting sent back to the trenches. Not for anyone.

We need to mend our bridges. We need to keep making our content, and stop seeing it as ride or die. We need to keep our nasty opinions to our own blogs and stop calling each other names when we don’t agree. We need to stop seeing blocking as unreasonable behavior and not proper curation. We need to stop raiding ship tags for wank, or dumping our crap on other ship’s tags in the first place. We need to give more people the benefit of the doubt, and engage on conversational levels about out fandom and our ships. We need to call out issues from within our own fandom, so when drama is getting splashed around we need to say “hey, they have a bit of a point, here, maybe we can talk reasonably about it”. We need to stop shadowboxing with an enemy we think is the boogeyman, when in reality we’re punching real people in the face. We need to tag proactively, and kindly, and keep our fandom corners clean so that when people come to visit we can say “hey, we take our tagging really seriously, you can’t call us out on it.” That’s the fandom I want to be a part of.

Most of all we need to be kind to each other. Be better. For this anon and for everyone else who’s ever been hurt by fandom. Enough shittiness is enough.

To anon. I’m sorry you’re hurting. It fucking sucks, and I’m so sorry things got driven to the point they have now. I’m sorry you got stuck in the middle of it. That said, I want you to write. I want to read your content. Shippy or not, I love the relationship that Sam and Dean have, and seeing all parts of it, fluffy and dark and codependent and cute and playful and snarky. I love G rated fic as much as I love dark NC-17 fic, and I don’t care for people who gen shame, like fic isn’t interesting if it doesn’t have sex in it. Screw that noise. I hope you write. I want you to write. As part of a challenge or not. I hope you will. Everyone I’ve spoken to about this tells me they want more gen S&D content.

You, and anyone else, are welcome to send me any content you want, any time you like. I don’t reblog NC-17 content that isn’t under a cut, or content that attacks other fans, but you can send me any ship, anytime - anyone who loves any ship in this crazy fandom, regardless of what circle of affiliation you usually sit with - and I’ll share your content. With the right tags, of course! We don’t have to be this dysfunctional with each other. We can cooperate and coexist.

To anon: write it. Write it just for you. Write it to make yourself feel better, and write it to stick it in the eye of everyone who’s made you feel bad about it. When you feel powerless, doing it anyway is the power that you have, and you don’t need anyone to give it to you; it’s yours entirely.

I’m sorry this took me so long to post back to you. As you can see I wrote a little more than I initially expected to, and it took a while. If it makes you feel even a little bit better to read it, then it was worth it.

Thanks so much for your ask, for your patience, and for your respect. I hope next time you want to drop me an ask, it’s in happier times.

#dogsled replies #wank for ts #incest mention for ts #this is a multiship blog #ship and let ship #purity culture can eat my whole entire ass #but tagging is important

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aion-rsa · 3 years

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A Comprehensive History of George R.R. Martin’s NFL Draft Takes

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Game of Thrones author George R.R. Martin loves three things above all else: writing exhaustive descriptions of feasts, killing Starks, and watching NFL football.

When the “A Song of Ice and Fire” creator is not writing the most impactful bit of fantasy storytelling since The Lord of the Rings, he follows his two favorite football teams: the New York Giants and the New York Jets (yes, supporting two teams in the same city is highly unusual and yes, he’s apparently fine with it).

Martin is fond of expounding upon his fandom in interviews (including this one with ex-NFL defensive end Chris Long) and also documenting his sports pain on his LiveJournal blog, “Not a Blog”. The Westeros story shepherd has been blogging steadily since pretty much the dawn of blogging in 2006. And over the past 15 years, he has marked 235 posts with the “NFL” tag.

Perhaps it shouldn’t be a surprise that Martin is using a blog the way blogs were intended to be used – providing professional updates with some informal sports observations sprinkled in. But I’ve personally never been able to get over the novelty of one of pop culture’s most important, sagacious figures, jotting down his ill-conceived sports takes just like the rest of us weirdos. I mean, get a load of this (which is baseball-related, not football):

Grown men wishing to bear the child of their favorite professional athlete is the sort of thing usually left to fringe sports talk radio shows or drunk group text chats. And yet, here is the writer of A Feast For Crows’ genius “broken man” monologue just throwing it out there for public consumption.

It’s like finding out that J.R.R. Tolkien used to submit his sports takes to The Times in the 1940s. “Yes, Stanley Matthews is talented but I fear his training regimen too rigorous for him to maintain the proper energy for the Three Lions to overcome France this year.”

Sadly, we do not have Tolkien’s football takes (apparently rugby was more his speed anyway). Since we do have Martin’s though, it’s worth examining how his many NFL opinions and predictions have held up over the years, particularly his commentary surrounding the NFL Draft.

The NFL Draft, in which NFL teams select college players to augment their rosters, occurs every year near the end of April or beginning of May. Martin, bless him, frequently likes to record his thoughts on the Jets and Giants’ draft during or after the event. Of the 235 NFL posts on NotaBlog, at least 12 of them deal with the draft.

Every Game of Thrones Spinoff and Prequel in Development

By Nick Harley

15 Best Game of Thrones Warriors

By Alec Bojalad

This year’s NFL Draft begins on April 29. A GRRM post about it is sure to come soon after (unless The Winds of Winter is taking up too much of his time). Before George offers his thoughts on this year’s selections, let’s take a trip back through memory lane to grade some of his previous years’ takes.

Bear in mind, that this list of Martin’s draft takes isn’t truly exhaustive. His blog for the 2020 draft, for instance, doesn’t include too many spicy opinions so it’s left out. But should you want the entire list of George R.R. Martin’s sports musings, I know a guy who wasted countless hours compiling all 235 posts.

George R.R. Martin’s NFL Draft Takes

The Post: April 26, 2019 – Day One The Takes:

The Jets should have selected defensive end Josh Allen over defensive tackle Quinnen Williams

Daniel Jones at 6 was an overdraft from the Giants. They should have chosen Dwayne Haskins

Analysis: It’s probably too early to tell on George’s first prediction though Williams looks to be the slightly better player now. George’s second take, however, is way off. Not because Giants QB Daniel Jones has been particularly great but George’s preferred QB Dwayne Haskins had a disastrous tenure in Washington, getting released midway through his second season. Cumulative Take Score: 0 for 2 (0%)

The Post: April 7, 2018 – Feeling a Draft The Takes:

The Giants should take Saquon Barkley

The Jets should take Baker Mayfield

Analysis: One of George’s most charming sports quirks is an avowed love of running backs. The running back position isn’t as important in the modern NFL as offenses become more pass heavy. The Giants drafting running back Saquon Barkley was very defensible though and hopefully he will recover from the knee injury that wiped out his 2020 season. George was also dead-on in urging the Jets to take Baker Mayfield. Unfortunately for him (but fortunately for yours truly) the Browns took Mayfield with the first overall pick. The Jets took Sam Darnold as a consolation prize and he is already no longer on the team. Cumulative Take Score: 2 for 4 (50%)

The Post: April 29, 2016 – NFL Draft Round One The Takes:

The Jets did well in taking linebacker Darron Lee over Memphis QB Paxton Lynch

The Giants should have picked pass rusher Shaq Lawson

Running backs Ezekiel Elliott and Derrick Henry will be good.

Analysis: George sniffed out Paxton Lynch’s futility like a Lannister plot. Darron Lee was pretty much a bust but at least he wasn’t Paxton Lynch. The Giants should not have chosen Shaq Lawson – their Eli Apple pick worked out perfectly fine. Here, George once again reveals his great taste in running backs. Though the position may no longer be as important, GRRM is one hell of a RB talent evaluator. Zeke Elliott and Derrick Henry are among the best backs in the league. Cumulative Take Score: 4 for 7 (57%)

The Post: April 27, 2013 – NFL Draft, Day 3 The Takes:

Ryan Nassib is Eli Manning’s successor

Taking Geno Smith will set the Jets back years.

Analysis: Ryan Nassib was not Eli Manning’s successor. Who’s to say if Geno Smith set the Jets back years or if they are just a poorly run organization? Either way, we’ll give that one to George since the team has had only one winning season since picking him. Cumulative Take Score: 5 for 9 (56%)

The Post: April 27, 2012 – NFL Draft, Round One The Takes:

“I am not at all happy with (the Jets) choice of Quinton Couples (sic).”

Cleveland had a good first round.

Ryan Tannehill will be a bust.

Analysis: George was right to be upset with the Coples pick. Unfortunately, George erred severely in trusting the Cleveland Browns to draft well. He undoubtedly was excited about the Browns drafting one of his beloved running backs, but that running back, Trent Richardson, was out of the league within a few years. George’s Ryan Tannehil prediction looked prescient for the first half of his career. Now – not so much, with the QB turning his career around in Tennessee. Cumulative Take Score: 6 for 12 (50%)

The Post: April 25, 2009 – NFL Draft, Day 1 The Takes:

The Jets and Giants were right to not draft Percy Harvin.

Kenny Britt is the best receiver among himself, Hakeem Nicks, and Brian Robiskie

Analysis: The Harvin concerns were understandable but he had a pretty decent career, all things considered. Hakeem Nicks was better than Kenny Britt. George was surely happy to be wrong though as Nicks is who the Giants drafted. Cumulative Take Score: 6 for 14 (43%)

The Post: April 28, 2007 – NFL Draft, Day One The Takes:

The Jets had a better day than the Giants

Brady Quinn will have a better pro career than JaMarcus Russell

Analysis: George nailed prediction one. The Jets drafted Darrelle Revis, who ended up being one of the best players in franchise history. George also nailed prediction number two but that’s because just about every other player in football history had a better pro career than JaMarcus Russell. Cumulative Take Score: 8 for 16 (50%)

The Post: February 5, 2006 – Super Bowl XL The Takes:

The Jets should draft D’Brickashaw Ferguson

“So another NFL season is now done, which means that Sunday becomes a work day for me once again. That should please everyone waiting for A DANCE WITH DRAGONS.”

Analysis: George’s first take here was absolutely correct. Ferguson was a Jets stalwart for a decade. Of course, I couldn’t help but share that second, non-football prediction. It turns out the people were not pleased as A Dance With Dragons would not arrive for another five years. Cumulative Take Score: 9 for 17 (53%)

Bonus George R.R. Martin NFL Takes

And now, a few other George R.R. Martin NFL Takes that have nothing to do with the draft…

The Post: September 1, 2017 – The NFL Is Coming The Take: “I have the feeling that I am going to be starting a lot of blog posts with ‘Life is miserable and full of pain’ this fall, at least where the Jets are concerned.” Analysis: Yup.

The Post: January 15, 2015 Locker Room Shuffle The Take: “(Rex) Ryan’s opening press conference with the Bills was very impressive. He seemed to be the old Rex again, brimming with confidence and swagger, all leavened with a healthy sense of humor. He promised to make the Bills a “bully,” a team that no one will want to play. I believe him.” Analysis: Of all the Jets coaches in Not A Blog history, Rex Ryan might be Martin’s favorite. He believes (pretty accurately) that Ryan did not get a fair shake in New York. But things in Buffalo did not pan out well for Ryan either. He was fired after two seasons and a 15-16 record.

The Post: March 15, 2013 – Free Agency Follies The Take: “Oh, and the Patriots… what a vile thing is Evil Little Bill (Belichick). The way he treated Wes Welker is disgraceful. Man has absolutely no loyalty to anyone. Watch and see, when Tom Brady’s talents start to fade — and they will, it happens to all of them — Evil Little Bill will ship him out as well.” Analysis: I don’t doubt that George was right that Bill Belichick would send Tom Brady packing the moment his talents start to fade. Where George erred, however, is that Tom Brady’s talents are never going to fade. He will never retire or even die. Brady left Belichick and New England in 2020 of his own volition…and promptly won a Super Bowl in Tampa Bay.

Jets or Giants: Which Team Makes GRRM More Miserable?

Indulge me on one last bit of George R.R. Martin NFL nonsense. Occasionally, Martin will begin or end one of his football-related blog posts with the phrase “Life is meaningless and full of pain” (sometimes, he swaps “miserable” for “meaningless”).

This is a notion that many sports fans should know quite well. Following a professional football team is mostly a never-ending series of woe and disappointment. And since Martin supports two NFL teams, he gets to experience twice the level of disappointment. But which New York football franchise causes George more pain? To find out, I tracked every “Not A Blog” post that contains the phrase “life is meaningless/miserable and full of pain” and figured out which team was making his life miserable. More often than not, it was both teams, but occasionally only one team was the culprit. The finally tally is:

New York Giants = 25 blog posts mentioning “life is meaningless and full of pain.”

New York Jets = 23 blog posts mentioning “life is meaningless and full of pain.”

cnx.cmd.push(function() { cnx({ playerId: "106e33c0-3911-473c-b599-b1426db57530", }).render("0270c398a82f44f49c23c16122516796"); });

This is a fairly surprising result given that the Giants have actually won two Super Bowls in the time since Martin has been blogging. But it turns out that pain cuts deeper than victory.

The post A Comprehensive History of George R.R. Martin’s NFL Draft Takes appeared first on Den of Geek.

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radio-charlie · 6 years

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♧ 'eyyyy

@maimakan tagging you in this coz it will get pushed p far back by reblogs (I’ll be up all night tonight) and you might not get the answered ask notification

You’re my: absolute brainiac mutual!

How I met you: God I hate this question. I so very rarely remember these things. I think I saw a huge comment you left on someone’s post and not only agreed with what you said but loved how you articulated it, so I took a look at your horusporus blog after that

Why I follow you: I follow the maimakan one because which Malaysian doesn’t enjoy looking at copious photos of food, and I follow the horusporus one because I love your opinions and some of your tags are super funny in this kind of bo-chap (Hokkien for ‘don’t care’) way. I also just like you as a person!

Your blog is: A lot of good shit in the tags. Excellent opinions that I always make myself read even when I got no reading spoons. And just like with no-ipsum I sometimes wish you’d make more personal posts because you are an interesting person. Lots of SJ and politics reblogs I find super trustworthy, like you are one of the few people on here where I’d look at something you reblogged and go ‘ok if horusporus reblogged this in agreement there fucking has to be something to it’. Sometimes it’s funny to scroll through your horusporus blog because it’s like ‘intellectual stuff intellectual stuff socially-conscious stuff eh suddenly got one post of nothing but Zayn looking handsome. ok”

Your URL is: maimakan is a truly good-ass pun 10 gold stars. Horusporus is a very fun thing to say out loud. It reminds me of that photo of two people in Egyptian deity get-up drinking coffee together. Is Horus your favorite Egyptian god? Is there some emotional significance attached to Horus? Sorry if you’ve already talked about this I forget a lot of things these days

Your icon is: For maimakan it’s… french toast? Is it? Or a cut-up grilled cheese sandwich? Omg I’m really bad at this idk man. For horusporus it is no longer the very suspicious-looking default icon, it’s you as a Powerpuff girl… tbh it’s a bit disarming because Powerpuff icons are what I’d expect from a blog that rbs a lot of did-you-know posts and diet white feminist stuff, but you have claimed it from that crowd and made it cool……. congrats

A random fact I know about you: You seem to like all these old uncle types…. why la like that…………………. you also have some mondo psychic powers! I remember you saying your mom used to use you as kind of a magic 8 ball. It’s kind of cool.

General opinion: You, like pekorosu, have a really special place in my heart because you always layan my stupid sobby personal posts and one time you took the time to talk me out of this dumbass self-loathing funk I was going through… I will always remember that. Idk you seem like someone who has to like, not care about shit (not SJ stuff, talking about more ‘personal’ things) to protect their heart, like you’ve gone through a lot of sadness and loneliness and you gotta do a bunch of shit to keep it at bay. But the small stuff really counts for a lot to you and so it ends up sort of mattering anyway? That’s the feeling I get. It’s also always seemed like you got a lot inside of you that you don’t really feel safe trusting people with, and that you are sad sometimes because it feels like people don’t really see you. Sometimes I think about you and wonder if you’re doing ok. I think you’re an incredibly smart person and there are times when I read your longer comments on SJ and politics and my face turns into that gawpy Ted gif from Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure lol. It seems like you are so smart that your whole life you’ve been sien at the world for getting so much wrong. Another feeling I have is that what you think may not always be very kind but more often than not it’s just you being out of fucks to give instead of you being actively malicious. I think that you are fundamentally a kind person though, it’s a big part of why I like you so much

A random thought I have: Sometimes when I read your ‘correct’ tag I hear you saying it as ‘korek’…. is that how you say it

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oysterchalk72-blog · 5 years

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The Linc - Kobe Bryant shared a funny anecdote about Nick Foles

Let’s get to the Philadelphia Eagles links ...

Four Downs: Everyone stays in their lane - BGN Earlier in the week I noted that the Eagles are, far and away, having the best offseason of the division. That guarantees nothing, but there’s little reason to believe that the Eagles aren’t the best team in the division. I sat on it for a couple of days because I figured a division rival would do something stupid. I should have waited a bit longer, because later that same day the Redskins signed Ereck Flowers. I am laughing as I type that. Not to some minimal signing bonus, non-guaranteed contract in a “hey this guy was a first rounder and we’ve got a pretty good position coach what’s the harm” type of deal. That would be defensible. No, they gave him a $3 million one year contract and guaranteed half of it. For a guy who couldn’t cut it on two 5-11 teams last year. They did sign another former first rounder to a no guaranteed money deal though: Marcus Smith. Yes, that Marcus Smith. If the Cowboys had a 1st round bust they’d probably have signed him too, though there’s still time to trade for Taco Charlton.

NFC East free agency grades: Eagles edition - PhillyVoice Part of the reason Michael Bennett was traded was because his personality clashed with some in the organization, I’m told, and apparently he graded out poorly against the run.

Josh Jacobs - Iggles Blitz Obviously you can’t say for sure what the Eagles should do since we don’t know who will be on the board. I like Jacobs quite a bit, but if a uniquely talented DT like Ed Oliver is somehow there, I’m taking Oliver without a doubt. Then again, we don’t even know if Jacobs will be on the board at 25. Daniel Jeremiah had him rated seventh in his latest Top 50 rankings. I don’t see Jacobs going before 25, but never say never. Teams down in the 20’s can do some crazy things at times. I do think the Eagles have to strongly consider Jacobs if he is on the board. Normally I’m not a big believer in taking RBs in the first round, but Jacobs is an interesting case. He is 220 pounds and a tough, physical runner. He’s also a gifted receiver.

Lawlor: How do Eagles stack up in new-look NFC East? - PE.com You can argue that the Giants were adding resources as they try to rebuild. OK, there is logic to that. Their roster needs help. There is one big problem, though. They kept 38-year-old Eli Manning around. He is not part of the future. The Giants think they are doing the right thing by keeping their veteran quarterback and two-time Super Bowl winner around. They think he can help young players develop while giving the team a chance to win games. It should be noted that in the last six years, the Giants and Manning have one winning season. The Giants also traded their best pass rusher, Olivier Vernon, and let their best defensive back, Landon Collins, walk in free agency. Again, the goal is to add talent, not lose it.

When the NFL Gives Away Draft Picks, You Better Take Them - Sharp Football It’s no surprise that two of the smartest teams over the last decade at understanding how to build winning rosters (Bill Belichick and Ozzie Newsome) are at the top of this list. It’s also no surprise that when you look back at the last 5 teams that have won a Super Bowl (New England, Philadelphia, Denver, Seattle and Baltimore) that 4 of the 5 teams dominated the comp pick process. The lone team that did not (Philadelphia) didn’t receive comp picks from 2015-2018. (Note that Howie Roseman didn’t reassume control from Chip Kelly until 2016, and needed to take some time to settle the roster.) By letting 2018 free agents walk, they received 2 comp picks in the 2019 draft and by letting 2019 free agents walk, they are set up to receive the #1 most draft value from the 2020 comp picks. Now that the roster is more settled, Roseman clearly appears to be focused on exploiting this rule when possible.

Eagles Mailbag: Faith in Nate Sudfeld, Vinny Curry signing, spreading it around - NBCSP I got a few questions about Nate Sudfeld this week and I certainly understand why. He’s now the Eagles’ backup quarterback and Carson Wentz has finished the last two seasons on the shelf. I think there are legitimate reasons for concern. From the time the Eagles got Sudfeld, I thought he was a possible QB2. The problem here is that he is unproven; we haven’t seen much of him outside of summer practices and minimal game action. It’s somewhat of a gamble for a team with Super Bowl aspirations to go into a season with an unproven backup, especially because of Wentz’s injury history. But, to be clear, I like what I’ve seen from Sudfeld. He seems to be pretty athletic and has a big arm. The Eagles have shown how much they like him at every turn. This is one of those situations where I’m skeptical, but just kind of trust their evaluation.

The Bizarre Path of the NFL Draft’s Most Unlikely Sleeper - MMQB He got good enough to warrant interest college programs, but Liggins wasn’t interested in playing college football, instead looking into a military career. That summer he had a change of heart. Rather than reaching out to big-time programs he called the coach at NAIA Dickinson State, in Dickinson, North Dakota, one of the only schools that haddn’t harassed him for initially not wanting to play college football. He ended up becoming the school’s best defensive player. Now, the cornerback is a hidden NFL draft gem in the process of being unearthed. From a training facility in Mesquite, Texas, where he’s currently working out, he’s already talked to more than a dozen NFL teams, including the Jaguars, Broncos, Chiefs, Eagles, Bills, Saints, Ravens, Cardinals, Buccaneers and Browns, despite not attending a single all star or bowl game. The 6’ 2”, 205-pound Liggins was receiving some heavy interest from one NFC West team, so much so that the team sent him their playbook so he could get acclimated to it.

In injury-shortened pro day, Delaware safety Nasir Adderley impresses in front of Eagles personnel - PennLive Adderley jumped 38 inches in the vertical leap, posted 19 reps in the bench press and covered 10 feet, 9 inches in the broad jump. He pulled his hamstring during the 40-yard dash, but Delaware said he ran 4.54 seconds. He also checked in at a shade under 6 feet tall and 203 pounds. Eagles safeties coach Tim Hauck was among the representatives from Adderley’s hometown team at Delaware’s athletic facilities Friday. There were scouts and coaches from many other teams, too, like Detroit Lions defensive backs coach Brian Stewart and Oakland Raiders scout Raleigh McKenzie.

Former Eagles TE Clay Harbor eyeing NFL comeback | ‘I still have a passion for the game’ - NJ.com At this point last year, Harbor was a contestant on “The Bachelorette”. He was coming off a lost season with the New Orleans Saints, as he spent the entire campaign on injured reserve with a wrist injury. Ironically, Harbor re-injured his left wrist while playing football during the taping of the reality show. He tore a ligament in the wrist, forcing him to rehab the injury as NFL teams entered their offseason programs. Despite his ailment, Harbor received interest from a few teams prior to training camp. His first visit was with the Buffalo Bills. Harbor suffered a minor abdominal injury during the workout in Buffalo, so the Bills passed on signing him. Due to the new injury, Harbor was unable to work out elsewhere and spent the rest of the season unemployed.

Right or wrong Giants GM Dave Gettleman is doing what should have been expected - Big Blue View Angry. Confused. Disappointed. Anguished. Frustrated. Resigned. Bitter. Disillusioned. Whatever word or words you want to use to describe them, I have been thinking a lot about the emotional state of many New York Giants fans recently, especially in the wake of the organization’s decision to send Odell Beckham Jr. to the Cleveland Browns. Many in the media haven’t helped, with their poison pens turned menacingly in the direction of Dave Gettleman, who some might think of as the crazy old man in charge of making personnel decisions for the Giants.

Cowboys free agency: George Iloka set to sign with Dallas Cowboys - Blogging The Boys Safety was one of the biggest needs that Dallas was facing when the offseason began. Bringing in Iloka hardly prohibits them from still drafting one, or even signing another in free agency, but it does lessen the need to a degree. This is a great move to give the Cowboys options at places where they need them.

The statistical argument for trading down in the draft - Hogs Haven In the first two rounds, trade back: The general rule of thumb from this analysis is that teams with first round or early second-round picks should be happy to trade down in the draft if the terms of the trade reflect the NFL Trade Value Chart, and that teams holding picks in the middle rounds (3 - 6) should be hesitant about trading them away to move into the top-50 if the terms of the trade are based on the Chart.

Nick Foles gets more than $45 million fully guaranteed at signing - PFT Without per-game roster bonuses, the deal has a base value of $85 million over four years ($21.25 million per year). If he’s on the 46-man roster for all 64 regular-season games, the deal becomes worth $87 million ($21.75 million). The maximum value of the deal (if he earns all incentives, an extreme long shot) is $101 million. The practical guarantee is $50.125 million because the Jaguars can avoid the $5 million roster bonus only by cutting him after one season, which would mean that he will have received $45.125 million for one year with the team. Which surely won’t happen, even though the Jags cut quarterback Blake Bortles after only one year of his most recent deal.

Why the NFL proposed replay rule modifications, and what happens now - ESPN It’s true. After months of discussion and debate, the NFL’s competition committee has no answer for the officiating mistake that marred last season’s NFC Championship Game. There apparently will be no safety net in 2019 if and when two highly graded officials fail to penalize an obvious pass interference foul happening a few feet away. This is maddening and begs for future trouble. But while the committee is punting on that specific problem, it has nevertheless proposed an unprecedented rule change that would address some of the highest-impact officiating mistakes of recent years. If approved -- and to be frank, it will be a tough hurdle -- the league would add pass interference fouls to its list of reviewable plays for one season. The proposal would represent a massive shift in philosophy in its own right, and more importantly, would address a type of mistake that affects the outcome of games more than any other penalty.

10 dominoes that could fall if the Cardinals draft Kyler Murray - SB Nation So what happens if he is? Murray’s selection at the top of next month’s draft wouldn’t just impact the Cardinals, it would affect the plans of every team looking for a franchise passer in 2019. It would also push Josh Rosen out of his position as Arizona’s budding young starting quarterback and onto the trading block. Here’s how that could look, given what we know about teams’ draft needs and current assets so far.

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