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wolfganglupos · 7 years

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So My Friend And I....

This is my take on today’s world. It’s designed to be rambly. The Narrator rambles on going from one point in their life to another until the end.

I hope you guys enjoy. Also, I wrote this when I was baked out of my mind XD

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So my friend and I were walking down to the pier. Nathan, my friend, was trying to get us to hurry up. He was quite frank and honestly a little rude. However, I paid no mind. We had been friends for years. About 13 years to be exact. We had met when we were 6 and we both started school together. He was from the lower class housing area and I was from Uptown. His parents managed to get him into my school on a scholarship. He is very talented as an artist. At six years old he was drawing Banksy-like portraits….as a warm up practice! Well, naturally Nathan and I became the best of friends! Our most obvious common interest being art, specifically the kind you use a skilled hand and years of practice to create. I became more interested in the financial side of art as Nathan became more in touch the creative side.

For fun, when we were..oh I’d say 12? 13 maybe. Nathan would sketch on a standard print paper. After he would finish it I would then try to guess how much it would sell for. I would take everything into account. His reputation at the time, the subject matter. How the general population would react to the subject matter. You had to be very careful about what you let the world see. Usually, the general public would make hurried and uneducated assumptions of the subject matter and the message the sender was trying to communicate to them. You have to remember to always see what exactly the subject matter is trying to say. It could be a reference to something you have no idea about and should reference. Instead,you might misunderstand it and jump to an extreme the material satirically or not referenced to.

Once, Fancy Pigeon came out with a marvelous new lotion to soften and moisturize a woman's skin. With this brand new lotion came a new art piece showcased all over the world! Fancy Pigeon commissioned a great artist to represent the new lotion. The great artist and his apprentices craft a piece on which was depicted three women of different colors, all clad in towels. The darkest was on the left, the lighter one stood glamorously in the middle as the third and brightest on shined on the right. The artist also decided it was a genius idea to put behind the women, an example of a woman's skin before using the new lotion on the left and then another representation of the women’s skin, however, this time it depicted her skin after the use of the lotion. It obviously doesn’t work on men. Fortunately, Fancy Pigeon came out with a men’s version.

The general public became so enraged at this, that even the lesser public had to turn the attention from the ever growing riots and public unrest in the country of Russia and it’s neighboring countries. Just to show the general public that they agreed. Fancy Pigeon could have done something slightly different. And yes the slight over sight of the placement of the before and after depictions was obviously fueled by alt-right extremists and the entire Fancy Pigeon company is corrupt and racist. Not one company has ever come out and opposed the overly sensitive general public directly. One particular CEO, Wendy I believe her name was, revolted in a most humorous way. During public debates, of which not many were actually useful or constructive in any way. They mostly contained arguments over nothing important or discussions of cats. Every Time someone would speak out against Wendy and her company in a humorously un-intelligent way or any way really where she could humorously retort back, she would….as the kids say….”burn” Them.

My favorite had to be when one ruly member of society shouted at wendy saying: King Burger shall win!

Wendy politely retorted: Win what, my dear sir? Possibly a participation trophy, I highly doubt it!

Reading and using Wendy’s humorous commentary in our own ways, helped me and Nathan throughout highschool of which we dropped out. By this time, with my help, He was selling enough art to sustain us. We were quite happy together. He’d work on his art. I would create funny and sometimes helpful shows for everyone to watch. We lived in a small flat in the center of the city we loved it there. The size didn’t matter to us. What mattered was that we had each other. Eventually, we had to move to a larger flat. Nathan started to turn his art sessions into their own shows and shared them with me and anyone who cared to watch. With this new combined wealth, we were able to afford this new flat which enabled us to create more ambitious ideas! It was a glorious time in our lives.

At first, we couldn’t declare our love for each other. The country had declared that people like me and Nathan could be married. We didn’t in the fear. Religious Extremists were running a muck in the world. If they found us. No one could or would dare to save us. Sure the government would do something about it. But nowadays? I doubt it.

When we finally did declare our love. People were rejoicing! Hundreds of thousands even millions would flock to our shows. Some to mock and harm us, but mostly to support us.

We had earned quite a loyalty with the people who enjoyed our shows. Those who supported us outside of the show. Even those who may not attend but respect us and our shows.

The high is unfathomable. You feel the warmth of so many caring souls.

We had their trust and love so much so that we had to watch what we said.

Even on sad and drooly days, as if the devil himself just went to the john on all of us. We would force a grand and empty smile. Never did we want to offend any of those loyal to us. Never did we want to hurt them. Ever so often we would speak of our feelings and opinions on a subject that is conversed all across the world. But if at all too controversial, we would only mention it in a small and very polite way. Even if we so dearly wanted to express out selves on the matter.

Our government took note of this. We weren’t the only ones with such a large following. Everyone had their favorite show.

When it came time for the new officials to replace the old ones. We and many others like us were hired to push a particular officials message to our audiences. Could you guess which ones? Well, the ones we favored of course. We never knew how angry our audiences got. They grab their pitchforks! Surround us! Every word we uttered was analyzed. Nathan’s old art was cut up and put back together in another way to depict a much different message. Those who opposed us or profited from out pain and suffering were extraordinarily skilled at this.

The general public seemed to forget everything after a fortnight or so. Even some officials forget very important details. Just the other day. An official poorly attempted to recite an event were two religious extremists were arrested as a massacre. I don’t remember any killing. In Fact, the talk was that they were arrested before they could massacre anyone.

As you can see, the world Nathan and I live in is quite confusing and immature. I look up as Nathan tells me to walk faster for the 100th time. We’re only a block away, I tell him. Look! They haven’t even started boarding. Fine, Nathan said. But I want to get something to eat before we leave, we won’t have normal food for a while.

Good point, I said. Let's go there. I point to a restaurant across the pier.

While we were enjoying our lunch. I chuckle when I glance up through the window at the sign on the pier.

It read: Pier #1337 Shuttles to the Farnsworth Space terminal Farnsworth and great (x30) uncle: Getting You The Fuck Off This Planet.

By: Wolfgang_Lupos

#Story #Short Story #Futurerama #Comedy #politic #political comedy #life #world #weed #washighwheniwrotethis #story time #i #don't #want #to #live #on #this #planet #anymore

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