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thatdesklamp · 8 months

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Writing advice from la lamp de desk

Summary of my tip-top writing tips:

‘Said’ is your best friend; avoid adverbs, you don’t need them; never use adjectives instead of someone’s name; avoid clichés like the plague; don’t mix metaphors; use the Emotion Thesaurus; just practise, all the time, and you’ll get better.

(I also feel the need to say that I was asked for writing tips on multiple occasions--I am not this wanky and conceited to offer this unsolicited)

Dialogue

‘Said’ is your best friend. You do not need to use other ‘dialogue verbs’ (shouted/explained/whispered/replied) as much as you think you do. ‘Said’ is like proper punctuation; it blends in and you don’t notice it… unless it’s not there. Use ‘said’ all the time, because your reader will not notice it. The reader always notices other ‘dialogue verbs’ (they stick out and draw the reader’s attention quite a lot) and so overuse of them becomes confusing. Often, too, people can use them redundantly, especially if the reader can figure out the character’s tone from the rest of the scene. For example: if Sally has just realised Mark has been cheating on her, you really can just have her say: “I hate you!”. You don’t have to write: “I hate you!” Sally shouted. The reader gets it.

An exception to this rule is often said to be when the dialogue verb (the ones that ‘stick out’) provide more detail. For example, if the scene with Sally and Mark was very tense and heated, the reader expects the “I hate you” to be shouted, and said viciously. Of course! Context clues. If instead, you write: “I hate you,” Sally whispered.”, then suddenly the words takes on a whole new meaning. It’s something unexpected! The ‘whispered’ verb was necessary, when the ‘shouted’ verb was unnecessary. ‘Whispered’ stands out, but it stands out for a reason.

(As with all writing ‘rules’, there are no rules, and this doesn’t mean you cannot use other dialogue verbs: I do, all the time. It’s just important to remember that you can use ‘said’ much more than you think, which allows you to use other dialogue verbs judiciously, and not unnecessarily.)

(Here’s a full post I made about dialogue going into more detail with more advice)

Adverbs

Avoid adverbs, you don’t need them. It’s often said that adverbs are unnecessary because they can always be replaced by something better. It’s a common trap to add them on to a word redundantly, when a stronger, single word would be a better fit: why say ‘walked clumsily’ when you could say ‘stumbled’, etc. Another common saying is that adverbs are used to tell and not show: why say ‘he spoke nervously’ when you could say ‘his voice trembled’. Also, see my section on the emotion thesaurus for more detail on this ‘show not tell’ idea.

(This doesn’t mean you can’t use adverbs; simply recognise that, potentially, there is a better and stronger way to write that one sentence that, likely, doesn’t include an adverb.)

(There will be a silent disclaimer like this for every section, but I can’t be arsed to write one every time, so just remember that there are no hard and fast rules in writing, but it’s good to be aware of the general rules, so you can choose to break them when it works well).

Names and adjectives

Never use adjectives instead of someone’s name. Please, please, 99% of the time you never ever have to do this. Someone’s name is like ‘said’; it blends in, and the reader doesn’t notice it, so you really don’t have to worry about overusing it as much as you feel you should be. Some writers will use adjectives in place of someone’s name because they’ve heard the rules against repeating words: they’ll instead write ‘The brunette hummed’ or ‘The older said’ or ‘The lawyer considered’, etc etc.

The issue? Why does the reader need to know this?! You are introducing new information to the reader, and they do not need to know it! The reader does not need to know that the character has brown hair, and, in fact, it doesn’t make any sense within the context of the scene to draw their attention to the character’s hair colour. Why do we need to know? The answer: we don’t. At all. All this does is interrupt the flow of the scene, and make the reader’s brain stumble a little. It feels clunky—you do not need to do this! I see it all the time (often when the two main characters are the same gender and use the same pronouns, and the author is struggling to show the reader who’s doing what). It’s a real pet peeve of mine—just use the character’s name! Or use a pronoun! It’s okay!

The only time this should be used is, similar to the ‘said’ rule, if you are intentionally drawing the reader’s attention to the information you are introducing via the ‘name-substitute adjective’, but this would be a pretty rare occurrence. E.g., Johanna is a high-flying lawyer, but is currently giving out really really poor advice to a friend of hers. Using ‘the lawyer’ instead of her name ‘Johanna’ would remind the reader of her profession, and could serve as something mildly comedic.

Clichés

Avoid clichés like the plague. This is explained really really well in the video, ‘How to Bore your Audience’ by the YouTube channel, The Closer Look. To summarise: when I talk about clichés, I’m talking about the writing phrases or situations that have been so widely said and used and overdone that they no longer generate and effect in the reader. Idioms (turns of phrase, expressions) count here, too. The video gives a really good example: ‘He looked like a deer in headlights’. When you read the phrase, you don’t think of what the simile is intended to convey; the wide-eyed look of fear, the franticness of the car swerving, the horror of innocence being slaughtered, etc. You just think: oh, yeah, they’re probably scared, or whatever. Clichés don’t work as a literary technique, because they don’t affect the reader in any decent way: they just tell the reader what they should know, rather than show them. (Watch the video: there’s loads more detail there, and it’s fab.)

Metaphors

Don’t mix metaphors. This ties in with clichés, when people don’t realise they’re using clichés, or turns of phrases/idioms. Using more than one metaphor in a sentence, when the metaphors have contrasting meanings or use contrasting analogies, can be confusing and won’t generate a clear image in the reader’s head. Good example adapted from Daily Writing Tips: “The pastor warned of impending danger lurking just beneath the surface, which had been hanging over the town’s heads in recent years.” So, first, the danger ‘lurking just beneath the surface’: you’re imagining that, with all the sinister images like murky water, the close-to immediate threat, the danger rising up to meet you… and then, suddenly, it’s above you, and the metaphor’s been switched, and it’s very confusing and the reader is jarred. Not fun, not fun.

The Emotion Thesaurus and ‘show-don’t-tell’

The Emotion Thesaurus is the new love of your life. Most budding authors have heard of the ‘show-don’t-tell’ rule. Don’t ‘tell’ your reader that a character is upset, ‘show’ them; it’s less impactful to say ‘Chloe was smug’ than to say ‘Chloe’s lips curled into a smirk, her chin jutting out’. Etc etc. But how do we think of all of these ‘show’ phrases? How do we remember how humans actually… behave?

USE THE EMOTION THESAURUS! Linked here, it gives loads of body language etc. examples that are so so helpful as a jumping-off point for how to express emotions.

The website, One Stop for Writers, is just a general godsend. There are also masterlists of character motivations, positive and negative traits, and billions of checklists and worksheets and ticksheets. Take some time off and just scour it: it’s the best thing ever, trust me.

Just practise, man.

Nothing comes naturally. I’ve been writing for years and years and, since I’ve been publishing on ao3, I can literally see how I’ve improved over the course writing IW. You will get better, and you will write faster (when I first started, it took me multiple hours to write one page), and you just need to write more. That is it: that is the only way to improve. You don’t need to publish anything if you don’t want to: write for yourself and yourself only! I still abide by this, to be honest; I know I’d be able to get loads more interaction with IW if I published quickly and regularly, but I would end up seeing writing as a chore, and as something solely for the readers, rather than as something that I genuinely enjoy and do as a hobby alongside everything going on in my real-person life.

Just work at it. Do it for enjoyment, and don’t worry if it’s bad. It might genuinely be bad: but everyone’s was, at the beginning. No-one starts off being amazing. Everyone keeps improving; I know I am, and I know loads of things that I need to improve at, and so I’m going to keep on writing and I’ll trust that I’ll get better with practise.

Just write. Please please please, just write.

#fucking that Eng lit a level uppppp!!#ALSO #JUST WRITE YOU DON'T HAVE TO PUT IT ONLINE TRUST ME #IT'S OKAY TO WRITE WITHOUT GETTING VALIDATION FROM OTHERS #FOCUS ON ENJOYING IT FOR YOURSELF FIRST OR ELSE YOU'RE GOING TO STRUGGLE TO ENJOY IT WHEN YOU PUBLISH IT I PROMISE

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qwertyfingers · 3 years

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Hi, I'm curious, could you elaborate on what things people in SPN fandom produce that you wouldn't have been able to filter out as a teen? I'm not really sure what you're referring to. Problematic porn? Bad takes? Wanky fan activity?

okay uh CSA, incest, and suicide trigger warnings for my answer here lol

first off i dont. really think you actually need me to explain this to you and the way this is worded really feels like either an attempt to minimise some truly atrocious shit or like, imply that i think highly of myself which is not true? i'm full of bad takes bro. i don’t care what people are posting as long as it’s not harmful. but there’s a few layers to the issues i was referring to yesterday

1) while it’s gotten a LOT better over the years, the defense of john’s parenting still happens fairly frequently, and as a kid who related extremely deeply to dean’s specific brand of Menhol Eelness that kind of defense of abuse would have really messed with my headspace! it’s messed up in and off itself to defend people who harm their kids - even unintentionally! - but the way that it specifically affects children who are still being abused is the worst of it. every kid with CPTSD who’s ever had to see someone defend behaviours they recognise from their own abusive family as done out of or as excusable because they had a good reason remembers that shit for the rest of their LIFE

there are echoes of what happened to me in dean, both in the abuse and trauma itself and the way it affects him in the aftermath. to see those things minimised by fans can be really re-traumatising for people. i’m very glad that my exposure to it comes at the end of several long stints in hospital and several years of intensive therapy. i don’t know that 18yo me who attempted suicide on a near weekly basis and hallucinated my abusive step father in my house all the time could have coped with takes like ‘its okay because john was drunk and alcoholism isn’t his fault’ or ‘john wasn’t abusiv he was just grieiving’ or ‘john didn’t abuse dean, everything he did was reasonable for their lifestyle’ without becoming deeply unwell.

2) we also all already know how much deeply fucked up incest content gets made and shared in spn circles. like, okay, have made peace with the existence of incest shipping. i blacklist that shit and i move on. most of it is avoidable and i can kind of forget about it if i’m being careful. but some of spn fandom is on another level. people write and draw some shit that is like, actively triggering on the ‘call my therapist and beg to be sectioned’ level. i had to renew my lorazepam prescription for the first time since lockdown started lmao. one of the fandom darling artists literally posted graphic dean/jack porn on their blog next to their really popular castiel art like. i’m not kidding when i say that would have made me hurt myself when i was younger

3) there are a LOT of really weird interactions btwn minors and adults in this fandom and while thats noit something that the corner of tumblr/discord i move through has any real problems with, i still see shit go down in other circles / servers, and the things i saw on the periphery when i was younger tell me it used to be wayyyyyyyyyyyy worse. adults actively encouraging like 13yos to read/write porn, children being pressured into incest content, 30yo+ people having intensely sexual interactions with minors like.

as someone who is generally of the belief that ‘minors n adults shouldnt interact online’ is the dumbest shit i’ve ever heard, supernatural fandom does sometimes make me think im wrong and wish i could set everyone under the age of 18 in a safe enclosure away from some of the insane people that go here like.

in general i think that teens having adult friends in fandom is good becuase it allows an avenue for discussing legitimate issues you have and they can be really helpful to help rpotect young people! I literally owe my adult fandom friends from my own childhood for giving me the lagnuage to talk about the abuse i faced and they were the first people who ever made me feel like i had a way out of my situation. without older online friends i might never have found out that the reason i had no interest in sex was because of trauma, or figured out that the reason reading fic about women or trans men upset me so much was because i was projecting my trauma onto them, and with cis mens bodies i didnt have that issue. i owe all of those things to adults who in the modern day might be chastised for being friends with me because i was young, but i needed them!

all this is to say that i think the breadth of inappropriate adult/minor interactions over the years have led to an environment where a generation of 20-somethings are now terrified of interacting with teenagers (for fear of becoming the adults who traumatised them), and a generation of teenagers who are largely terrified of talking to adults (for fear of being traumatised) and miss out on guiding hands that some of them really need. if the adults in your physical life harm you, and you cannot turn to adults on the internet, what do you do?

4) i’m so tired of people writing underage porn, bro. there are enough adults in this show, grow the fuck up

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bonniemansfieldd · 3 years

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My Pet Goblin Grief

I wouldn’t say I’m overly experienced in many things; baking - perhaps; exams maybe; tactical chundering - I’m pretty good; but grief? Me and her go way back.

Of course, everything is relative and I’m grateful to say that I’ve never lost someone as close as a parent or sibling but I definitely have had a bigger taste of the Grieving Life™ than most which is an odd feeling. A running joke we have is that I have one of those stamp loyalty cards to the local cemetery and now I’m only 1 off of my own free burial- wahoo!

Death-focussed conversations are a centerpiece in our house and the question “What do you want as your funeral song?” is as easily asked as “What is it you want for Christmas?” (For the record, mine’s Only One Who Knows by the Arctic Monkeys, Day N Nite the Crookers Remix by Kid Cudi and probably the Moulin Rouge version of Your Song - but the last one is still up for debate). I never realise these sorts of things are a bit odd or macabre until I ask the same questions to Ungrieved friends who always respond with the same notion of “why are you asking such morbid things” or “are you planning on killing me?” or “This isn't a fun birthday drinks convo.”

For context, my first experience with death was when my grandad died when I was 3, I have little memory of this other than my mum breaking the news to me when she was stark-naked, post-shower and drying her hair; a weird image in hindsight. My second and third were very close together and now feel fused in my brain; my mum was the eldest of three and within the space of 50 days her sister died due to alcoholism and her brother committed suicide due to depression and a psycho ex wife. Also my dog died a month or 2 later, rule of 3 and all that. At the age of 12 I was properly introduced to the beasts that are grief, depression and the aftermath of a suicide, none of them I would give good Yelp reviews tbh.

Nobody teaches you how to grieve. There is no handbook on ‘How to Navigate the Loss of a Loved One’, never mind one on ‘How to Deal With Traumatic Deaths Whilst Dealing with a Now Suicidal Mum Alongside All the Other Shit of Your Teenage Years’ (although there should be given its catchy title ) Now here��s where I made my first mistake when learning to live with these things - I just Kept Calm and Carried On like a fucking Dweeb. No major lash outs; no therapy, no rebellious phase (yet), no prolonged mourning period, no deep conversations with my parents on how i was feeling. I’d wake up, go to school and be a good little boffin, come home, ignore the fact mum had not gotten out of bed in 3 days or spoken in 30; do my homework, have my tea, go to bed, be awoken by the sounds of my mum blasting their funeral songs and scream bawling downstairs; put in my earphones and watch Flushed Away; cry a bit; eventually fall asleep; repeat.

Looking back now my chosen ignorance was ridiculous and really came back with a vengeance when I was 15 and my mum was back to relative normality. I started to face what I’d pushed down and I released all the pent up icky-gross-wtf-feeling via trying to fuck anyone I could, developing an eating disorder, fancying only the most wastemen of boys, binge drinking and thinking Morrissey was the pinnacle of God’s creation. I mean, it did the job in the end but FUCK ME it was the dumbest way to do it and ultimately caused a whole load of other problems in my wee noggin that I really didn’t need.

Thankfully (she says with sarcasm and one solo gunfinger), I got to perfect my craft at Grieving in 2020, aged 18, when another Auntie died unexpectedly of bowel cancer and then my childhood friend killed herself, aged 21, due to cripping BPD. I really mean it when I say I’m sick of people dying. This time round I’m really trying to do it the proper way and not suppress it for 3 years and get myself in a knot like last time, although what is the proper way to grieve? Since this is not my first rodeo I know what NOT to do but that’s all I got so far.

Now, I have a few key points I’m really trying to abide by, the first one being for the love of GOd put your own grief first. I now have deep rooted mummy issues which partly stem from trying to pick up the pieces of her grief whilst burying my own with Aardman Animations and wanky Morrissey lyrics. She didn’t support me, in all honesty not many in my family did (which is understandable!) cause everyone was trying to keep their own heads above water which ultimately I should’ve done too, but didn’t. Learning to say “I am in pain, I am grieving, I need to put myself first right now or else my future therapy sessions are going to be hella expensive” is really fucking hard, ESPECIALLY when everyone else is crumbing too. But it’s the whole air mask on a plane scenario where you cannot help anyone else until you’re breathing clear too.

My next point; some days you actually feel okay and you’re not the worst person ever for feeling like that. It’s the whole ball in a box grief analogy that I cba to explain but highly reccommend looking up. Grief doesn’t leave you, you just learn to live with it and it’s kinda as simple as that. Therefore, there will be days where you do manage it, maybe even forget it for a while. It becomes a feeling so ingrained into you, you don’t even notice it’s there and just get on with things. You’re not a terrible person for having a nice time with your mates if your Gran’s just died. You’re not the spawn of satan if you go out on the pull a few weeks after your mate’s topped themselves. Yeah, their lives have stopped but why the fuck should yours?

It’s a difficult moment, immediately after you lose somebody and venture out into the world to see that it hasn’t stopped turning. One example I have of this is when I met my cousin for a coffee the morning after my friend had taken her own life. I woke up feeling fairly normal, got ready and hopped on the bus to town and looked out the window to see the city moving as usual. I got off the bus two stops later when I realised my sudden snotty crying was getting a bit loud. I don’t remember starting to cry but I do remember walking up the High street amidst the Christmas shoppers blatantly sobbing and intermittently vaping (please laugh at this image cause I do- I also had a glazed donut in hand if that helps.) These experiences are also not limited to the immediate aftermath of a death, I’ve had similar experiences years after they’ve passed at gigs, on nights out, at the cinema, at bus stops and even watching The Simpsons (screw Matt Greoning for having Close To You as Marge and Homer’s fucking wedding song). My point is, big jabs of grief happen as randomly as moments of peace, acceptance and even contentment - it’s all just a big clusterfuck cocktail that adds a bit of spice to your life.

One thing I am trying to practise more when taming my grief goblin is actually talking about it which I failed to do before. As previously mentioned, people around you can get a bit awkward or uncomfortable when talking about all things death, ESPECIALLY when they haven’t experienced it themselves and you’re actually reaching out to them for support. I’ve had some advice that was great and some that was fucking awful, I even have grief pet peeves now which is not something you see much of on Room 101 (although I am willing to put my argument forward to Frank Skinner if he’s interested in that sort of thing).

So, what shouldn’t you say to someone who’s being RKO’d by their very own grief goblin? Never- and I cannot stress this enough- say how “StRoNg” or “bRaVe” you think they are. Never. Cut that shit out, it’s fucking GROSS. THis is an especially common thing from those Ungrieved and it honestly feels like an Alexis Rose Pity boop on the nose or pat on the head. To me, those words mean “awwwwww, sucks to be you pet.” which may sound harsh but hear me out. The wonderful Maya Richardson describes the frustration with this in regards to racism/transphobia/homophobia but I also think it applies to grief perfectly:

“You’re so brave comments often feel like a microaggression as it’s a form of ‘othering’.This is to view or treat someone as intrinsically different and alien from oneself. The comments Basically say “your life is harder than mine” and feels like a back handed compliment Or an insensitive power move even if they meant well.”

The “you’re so __” comment gives you no support and is alienating, it makes you feel like you’re a freak who’s fighting a one person battle that you can only fight on your own cause no one else is as “strong” or as “brave” as you. Also, I’m not fucking strong or brave. I don’t want to be strong, I didn’t ask to be brave, and if not being these things means I don’t have to meet my grief goblin every morning then I’d rather be a weak coward any day.

The best response I’ve ever had when telling a friend I’m grieving or I’ve just lost someone is “Fuck me! Another one? That’s wank. Do you want to talk about it?” Not only did this not isolate me and it gave me the opportunity to talk through things to process them better, but it also validated everything I’m feeling. Yes it is wank thank you for acknowledging how utterly wank this situation is - it’s the biggest pile of wank I’ve ever waded through and no, I’m not “brave” for doing that.

Let them talk about it, listen to them, hug them, recognise the wank they're wading in and give them a hand to pull them through. Also, if they don’t want to talk about it then,for the love of God, just treat them as you would normally. When you’re walking on eggshells around someone they can also see the shells you’ve scattered about the place and it makes it all so lonely - cut that shit out. I’m someone who handles pain via humour cause if i don’t laugh i’ll cry and if i cry i wont stop so, if I make a joke about cemetery visits being more like European tours due to how many graves we visit and how fucking long it takes, PLEASE just laugh; I’m trying my best here.

Ultimately, I see grief as a pet for life that you learn to train and care for, but it still does piss on your floor or bite your heart every now and then; and if you know a friend who has one of these funny little creatures you should treat it as such- a new pet of theirs thats learning to be obedient. They may leave it at home sometimes or introduce you to it if they feel comfortable but, in the end, it is here to stay. And that’s okay.

Treat them and their grief goblin with the respect and love it deserves and then, I assure you, we’ll all pull through together - eventually.

#grief goblin iteasssswhatiteasssss yolo funnythoinnit

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thefearofcod · 6 years

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☆Writer Asks☆

This was a ‘Get to know the author’ meme on twitter. Originally, you were supposed to answer a question if you got so many likes, but screw that. Let me just answer this ALL for you and tag some of my writing friends.

1. Explain your AO3 handle.

It’s my old tumblr handle, I should probably change it. (bottlecapmermaid)

2. Favorite fanfiction trope?

For kylux, DEFINITELY galactic empire aus, or other politically-charged things. I love aus, I collect them like a dragon.

3. Favorite place to write?

curled up on the couch like a scrunchy gremlin, or longhand at a desk because i am an old man.

4. Favorite ships in your current fandom?

THE K Y L U X. I love trash. I love awful men. I love space. I love villains. This hole was made for me. My other, non-star war ships are Queequeg/Ishmael (Moby-Dick), Sly Blue/Mink (dmmd lmao i’m from the past), Parian/Foil (Worm), Kanda/Lavi (d.gray man)

5. What are your steps to get into the Writing Mood™?

I don’t have a Writing Mood, i usually have at least an hour to kill and an idea chewing on my brain for a few days. Then I start it, stare at it, and then work on it for about 70 years

6. What program/app do you use to write?

gdocs on everything, or else I longhand and transcribe it when I really hate myself.

7. List your zodiac sign, favorite ice cream flavor, Hogwarts House, and your opinion on pineapple pizza.

libra, coffee, slytherin, if it’s not spicy i’ll eat it.

8. Link us a fanfic that made you cry.

Foxtrot Uniform Charlie Kilo by @heyktula is one of my FAVORITE fics and it FUCKED ME WAY UP I LOVE IT, i got so fucking!! invested!!!! in Ben’s shitty life choices and Hux being so FUCKING GODDAMN MEAN and yes i cried ok i can admit it

9. Link us a fanfic that made you laugh.

I don’t really search out humor, but guys please understand that the following is one of the most beautiful things i have ever seen and it moves me to tears every time i see it, which is often because i read it when i am feeling poorly: Cannibal Rumpus Asshole Factory

10. Link us a fanfic that left you in complete awe at the writer’s ability.

yeah i link it every time but nobody said i had to stick to one fandom so HERE’S BLUTRUNST AGAIN KIDDOS. I laughed. I cried. I learned to cook. I overanalyzed a painting. I developed a deep and abiding crush on a leper. I was and still am hot for every main character in this fic. I got obsessed with Bluebeard. I learned to go to the opera every chance I get. @incurablenecromantic improved my life in ever-evolving ways with this fic and I will never fuck off about it. Fuck dude i love this heckin book so much

11. List your kinks.

Gore, power imbalances, blood, choking, knives, gore, poor life choices, cannibalism, emperor Hux.

12. How do you come up with your ideas?

I make a joke and then riff on it for a while, and then realize to my total horror that I am now serious. This is how I create nearly everything.

13. How do you implement said ideas into a cohesive narrative?

Very bold of you to assume I do at all! I don’t really write longform fic, so I usually just do either riffs on fairy tales or brief and wanky psychological pieces. I have an emperor Hux thing in the works and it’s gonna be long and i’m like who are you and how did you get in my house. Probably my best bet is to do a series of related one shots.

14. What are your working on right now? Share a little snippet or a description.

I’m a WIP monster so i have roughly 700 things going, but please take this funky fresh piece of Emperor Hux funtimes:

And before him on the white steps of the dais kneels Kylo Ren. His robes are his customary black but finer stuff than usual, thick raw silk, not worn ragged and stinking of the gore of his enemies. There is a time and a place for a shambling giant caked in blood and filth, but Hux’s coronation is not it.

“Kylo Ren,” Hux says, even and magnanimous, “do you swear your loyalty to the service of the empire?” On pain of death goes unsaid. Hux does not need Ren to hunt down those who betray him.

Ren’s eyes, when he looks up from Hux’s, are wet and shiny with relief. “I swear myself to the Emperor, his Imperial Majesty,” he replies, voice unusually steady.

“I accept your fealty, Master of the Knights of Ren.” At this point, the Knights are mostly Hux’s personal ghosts, carrying out assassinations and coups where he or Ren cannot. He can’t see them from his vantage now, but he knows a couple are in the crowd, subtly armed to the teeth in case of unrest, and the rest are in whatever scraps of shadow they can find. Hux extends his gloved right hand, gold ring flashing in the light.

But instead of kissing the ring, Ren lowers his head again and slowly, deliberately bows until his lips press against the shined toe of Hux’s boot.

Such flagrant acting out would ordinarily warrant punishment, but Hux’s first act as Emperor cannot be to kick his terrifying right hand in the face in front of the whole galaxy. Even a display of devotion like this, always welcome behind closed doors, is not what Hux outlined for Ren and is, as such, disobedience. Ren must know this, and must know that Hux knows. However loyal Ren is, part of his nature is to push and strain against boundaries, even when he has no idea what he would do upon breaking them.

Tagging: @a-flickering-soul, @causticchemist and uh anyone else who might like

#askbox memes #morgan writes a thing #what is a Fore Matte

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ellarotteveelmaterialsandmedia · 2 years

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Provided Resources from AUT

https://www.viva.co.nz/article/at-home/design-director-zoe-ikin/

Zoe Ikin

According to Type: Design Director Zoe Ikin

The nitty-gritty aspects of design are Zoe Ikin's life

By Claire McCall

Saturday April 1, 2017

Zoe Ikin is in the business of going un-noticed. “Graphics are not meant to get in the way of communication,” says the design director at Alt Group, the Auckland design agency that has been called a “super power of creativity”.

It’s a contrarian thought because, such is the 30-year-old’s immersion in her craft that she cannot help but notice. “It sounds wanky but we build our image by what we wear and all the stuff around us, so yes I notice everything.”

The daughter of architect and furniture designer Humphrey Ikin, Zoe grew up with a healthy respect for the prototype and one-off pieces that very often entered their lives, and stayed forever. Now that her parents have moved to the Kaipara to farm — “the fences and gates are meticulous. Dad designs every detail” — she and her partner, fellow designer Sam Trustrum, live in Kingsland, with a collection of her dad’s furniture. Which means Zoe’s had first-hand involvement with several items in the home, including the dining table made from tanekaha (a coniferous native). “Mum, my two sisters and I would help Dad in the workshop, especially during ‘glue ups’ when a piece had to come together quite quickly.”

READ: New Zealand at the Venice Architecture Biennale

Although she learned to value the physical process, Zoe says she is too impatient to be an architect: “I like the quick turnaround of graphic design”. Nevertheless on joining Alt Group six years ago, she soon realised her potential lay in the “doing” rather than conceptualising. “I’m still a craft person,” she says. “My focus is on properly set type, images, layout and digital execution.”

Zoe has scooped her fair share of awards over the years, including multiple Gold Pins at the New Zealand Best Design Awards and internationally, and has had the privilege of working with household names such as NZ Opera and Fisher & Paykel where a shift in perception was on the cards for this home-grown business.

Alt helped move the appliance company from a commodity supplier to a premium player. “When we first came on board, they had the world-leading technology but the ‘cupboards were bare’,” Zoe explains. By which she means the photography was inconsistent and incomplete, as was the typographic standard and brand messaging.

The self-confessed typography geek was happy to change that. “Typography talks in a certain tone; it helps copy and imagery tell a story in meaningful way.” Subtle tweaks to kerning and leading are also important. “If you saw some Apple copy on a billboard, even without the logo, you’d be able to recognise it.”

Zoe’s love of typography spilled over into a personal endeavour: hand-soldered silver letter brooches. “It was fun but ended up being too much work and I made no money.” Another labour of love is Studio Magazine, an ongoing project with Sam and Clem Devine that explores creative workplaces around the world. “That idea was born at an after-party for Semi-Permanent and was really an excuse to get inside other people’s studios.”

That is exactly what the emerging designer did when Alt sponsored her on a three-month working sabbatical to VSA Partners in Chicago, an American agency that counts Harley Davidson, M.A.C Cosmetics and Converse among its clients.

Being exposed to a different visual style and immersed in the culture was an epiphany. American design is either rooted in history, with references to woodblock type or layered texture, or future focused and digital with a visual emphasis on gradients and transparencies.

READ: Why Wicker is Cool Again

Returning to the New Zealand context was exhilarating. “If we design a beer label, we can choose to make it feel ‘Midwest’ or feel like a piece of refined Swiss design. As Kiwis, we are so outward looking. There’s great freedom in that.”

Forging an identity for a brand is a weighty responsibility and Zoe feels it keenly in her current assignment, branding Pacific Gardens in Manukau, a large-scale housing development. “It’s a whole new suburb and, while we want to give it identity, a sense of place, we don’t want it to feel gated. It needs to be aspirational but not out of reach.”

Apart from marketing collateral including developing a logo, Alt Group has, as is their way, become involved in a broader sense. They’ve designed the building that will showcase the terraces and apartments, even making suggestions on the type of hospitality required to do the job well. And they will design elements such as door numbers and directions signs to maintain continuity.

Is this not all a little contrived?

“A reliable experience instils faith,” argues Zoe. “It’s good for the client and good for the customer.” If that means controlling the whole shebang, from coffee cups to uniform and the on-line engagement, they make no apologies.

Not surprising then that this discipline flows through to her after-hours: Zoe and Sam’s wedding was in the design stages for six months. In the evenings, once the couple’s 2-year-old daughter Mia was tucked up, she’d get busy. “I never watch TV and I can’t really switch off,” she says.

Apart from the usual bridal decisions, Zoe stencilled street signs so that guests didn’t get lost en route, made 120m of scalloped bunting, foraged for flowers and dried grasses with her mum and sewed linen aprons for the caterers. The event was a sequenced “slow reveal” from the ceremony at a tiny iconic church on the hill to the reception in a woolshed on her parents’ farm.

As it turned out, getting married to the person who “doesn’t think I’m crazy when I obsess over detail” was the perfect opportunity for expression. “I don’t just love design, I live it.”

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piccolina-mina · 5 years

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I love you @witchwolfmouse. I love you with my whole heart

Honestly, and respectfully OP, it's literally EVERYTHING said above with a big cosign. Since I mentioned the pair the spares bit myself, I can speak for myself in that regard when I say it's literally everything said above and that's it.

The irony of this is no one, absolutely NO ONE has said Maria and Kyle are an awful ship. Even those criticizing those in fandom desperate to pair the two spares together to protect the ships they care about aren't saying Kyle and Maria is a bad ship. I'm literally one of those people who is side-eying some people's motivation behind shipping two characters that haven't even interacted, but I have also admitted (as have others like myself) that I'm totally game for the show exploring it for a lot of the reasons you mentioned, and I cannot wait to actually see the two of them interact because they probably will have fun chemistry and could be a cute ship.

There are like a handful of genuine Kyle and Maria shippers, and not content (can't wait for it though so bring it on), and they're more than entitled to have fun with their ship. I say the same thing for the Kyle and Alex shippers out there. Nothing delighted me more than seeing Kylex shippers too, so wholesome and sweet and I lowkey started shipping it myself thanks to them. 😘

But the people who are treating Maria and her love life or Kyle and his love life like an afterthought by shoving them together as an afterthought for the sole reason of them not interfering with their Malex and Echo ... those people are the only people who some fans are side eyeing. That's it. You can usually find them literally stating how cute the pairing would be in part because it wouldn't affect Malex. They're usually the same ones passive aggressively saying "this friendship is cute" under anything that remotely has to do with Michael and Maria. So, yeah, in that sense it's transparent, and those people and only those people are who some fans are annoyed by.

Those same fans who think it's fucked up to entertain the idea of Maria sleeping with her best friend's soulmate if it's Michael are pairing the spares with Maria and Kyle even though Kyle is Liz's ex. If we really hated the ship itself, we'd bring that up a thousand times more because Maria knows about Kyle and Liz's history. She doesn't know about Michael and Alex's, right? But it isn't about that at all.

This fandom at least on here isn't the most open to those who aren't talking about the majority's issues, so any Maria and Michael fans on here mostly stay out of fandom or go elsewhere. They don't even have the space to discuss anything here. So what is this imaginary war if you will between two subsections of fandom with more similarities than differences who you need a telescope to find anyway?!

Especially when the issue brought up is explained. It's not the ship that anyone has an issue with, it's the motivation of some people for shipping it that people are annoyed by.

It's true. I don't even think anyone realizes that literally anyone who says anything that can remotely be perceived as anti Malex has to insist multiple times that they are in fact a Malex shipper or express how much they like the ship before they can state their opinion. Even then, one still runs the risk of being called homophobic or other things. Seriously, pay attention to how often people do that, like they're trying to prove something, or apologizing, or trying to make sure they don't get attacked, and then think about how messed up that is. Because that is mesed up.

All anyone wants is to be able to discuss all parts of this series. They want to discuss all the characters. They want to be free to discuss any and all ships, hell even crack ships without putting disclaimers up to make sure they aren't attacked or having what brings them joy shat on by the majority telling them they are wrong or not respecting them. Or reminding people that it's a reboot all the time, like no one knows that.

And Maria fans just want to talk about Maria. Maria's life. Maria's storylines. Maria's friendships. And yes, even Maria's love life whether it's Michael or Isobel or Kyle or someone else. They don't want an entire tag dedicated to a fantastic character to ONLY be filled with people speaking of her as a contrivance. That's it. That's the only complaint here, and it is annoying that it keeps getting turned into other things that it isn't about.

It's true that there has yet to be a single person who said a hateful word about Maria and she's well liked. But that doesn't mean that the way in which she is discussed isn't hurtful, and inconsiderate, and annoying, and problematic.

Simply put, people want to be free to discuss more than just one particular ship or topic or a couple of characters without those discussions or tags or photo sets or meta getting derailed or taken over etc. And the only reason the Kyle and Maria thing is brought up is because of how it ties in with everything else going on with fandom and Maria and even fandom and Kyle. The ship itself isn't the problem. It's actually cute af in theory and could be in practice when they give them screentime together to see if the chemistry is there. They're my favorites and I lowkey ship them with everyone myself, but whatever.

OK, I’m not trying to be wanky, but I find it kind of hilarious how offended I’ve seen some people get over the fact that there are those who ship Maria with Kyle. They are mad because the two of them have not yet shared scenes so apparently it’s a bad and offensive thing to ship them.

So, while I’m not a Maria and Kyle shipper per se (though I’ve considered the possibility of a future relationship between them), I’m gonna lay a few things out.

1) First off, let us acknowledge that both the books and OG has everyone conveniently paired off. In this version, we have the two major pairings of Max/Liz and Michael/Alex. Isobel/Noah are married but still presented as a lesser couple compared to the epic drama of echo and malex. Yet even they are shown to be deeply in love with one another, and Noah is not giving up on Isobel during her current crisis.

2) Kyle and Maria are both single as a pringle. Even with Kyle’s fooling around with Liz, they’re not in love or even in like. They are friends who have fooled around.

3) While the only scene they’ve shared is the brief pilot flashback scene with Max looking through the window, it can be established that Kyle and Maria know one another and have since high school. (And if it wasn’t for Heather having prior filming obligations, she would have been in HS scenes with Liz and Kyle, it’s very likely.)

4) Kyle and Maria have some similarities. They’re both trustworthy. They’re both smart. They’re both loyal friends. They’re both funny and kind of sassy. Neither are afraid to tell it like it is.

5) Yet their differences make for some fun potential and an interesting balance. Kyle- man of science. Maria- woman of faith. He’s a doctor. She’s a bar owner and psychic. He was a quarterback douche in HS, she was a hippie protester. There could be a fun dynamic.

6) People can ship whatever. And nothing against crackships, but it’s not even as though Kyle and Maria are one though some like to act that way. The two have some sort of established relationship even if we haven’t seen it on screen yet. And even if it’s in the past. You can’t use the argument of them not having scenes (even if they really haven’t run into each other in town in the last 10 years which is highly unlikely). Because Max and Liz didn’t see each other for 10 years either. And no one doubts that they have an established relationship of some sort.

7) Those those same people that I’ve seen complaining about shipping Maria with Kyle seem to think that shipping Maria with Michael is much better. Since they’ve shared two whole scenes together. And Michael is in love with Maria’s best friend (and him with Michael) and this has been the case for the past ten years. Like you can’t make this up. 🤣 But hey. That’s also perfectly fine. I mean why not? Just don’t act like you’re somehow above Maria and Kyle shippers or that your reasons for shipping M&M are more valid.

#roswell new mexico #maria deluca #kyle valenti #kyluca #rnm discourse #rnm notoriety #needless drama again #rnm fandom fkery

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brokensmilefanfiction · 7 years

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Chapter Two

The Emmy’s after party wasn’t as posh as I thought it would be.

Everyone may have been in suit’s and floor length dresses, but it was the same as any after party I’d been to. The alcohol flowed freely and the socializing was at an all time high.

My plan had been to go straight to the bar, the typical Australian route, but the moment I stepped in the door, I was getting congratulated.

Not just from the likes of the Big Bang cast, Jim Parsons and Kaley Cuoco, but from the likes of Sofia Vergara and a personal hero of mine, Amy Schumer.

“I loved your character. You were so funny.” She smiled.

“Thank you. Thank you so much. That means so much coming from you.” I smiled, still clutching my award.

With that she said goodbye and I headed towards the bar. I had only just gotten my drink when I was approached by two men.

One was bald with glasses and the other was tall with dark hair. They approached me as a due and given they were both wearing suit’s, I got a strong ‘Men In Black’ feeling from them.

“Can I help you?” I asked, momentarily started.

“Yes, my name is Weiss.” Said the Bald man, “This is my friend David Benioff.” He said gesturing to the dark man beside him.

Their names sounded familiar but I couldn’t place from where, “And what can I do for you Mr. Weiss and Benioff?” I asked, but as I said their names I suddenly realized who I was talking to, “Oh hey, you guys are from Game of Thrones!” I said in delight.

“Yes, we’d come to talk to you about possibly working together.” Said Benioff.

“Hey I don’t know if you guys know this but I’m a comedy actress. I don’t think I’d suit the world of Westeros.” I joked.

They smiled.

“No actually we’re hosting a variety show for charity. We were wondering if you’d like to be one of the guest acts.” Said Weiss.

I blinked, taken aback. A HBO show was doing a Comedy Show for Charity and they wanted me for a guest act? Well that was bizarre! But I wasn’t about to turn down a gig for charity. It was for charity!

They must have taken my silence for reluctance because very quickly Benioff began to tell me the details, “We’re looking at doing it in early November. It’s for the Red Nose foundation who we’ve had a close working relationship with for a while now. It would consist of some of our main cast coming out and doing skits as well as a bunch of acts from some known comedians.” he said.

“Sure. When is it? If I can don’t have anything else booked, I’d love to be a part of it.” I smiled. Though a question began to nag at me and I had to ask, “What made you think of me?”

“Well Kit is a really big fan of yours and he recommended you for it.” Explained Weiss.

Kit? Kit Harington? He had recommended me for a job?

My conversation with Andy quickly rushed back to my mind. Now I really had to go and speak to him, at the very least to say thank you for the recommendation.

I gave Benioff and Weiss my agents details and we went our separate ways. After that, I looked around the room for Kit, sipping my drink as I did. I’d almost finished it when I spotted him over in a corner, sitting on a stool by a table, talking to an unfamiliar man.

I took a moment then to check him out. Now that he seemed to be a lot more relaxed, I could actually see the physical appeal he had. His dark hair slicked back and a resting bitch face, he had the dark and brooding thing going on.

Downing the rest of my drink, I placed it on the bar and made my way over to him. He didn’t notice me approach so I simply placed my award on the table in front of him as I sat down on the stool next to him.

He jumped in shock at seeing the award on the table in front of him, then he turned to look at me and a smile broke out across his face, “Hi.” He smiled.

“Hi.” I smiled back, “I thought I better show you what one of these looked like, seeing as you didn’t win.” I said seriously, “Its probably the closest you’ll ever get to one.” I teased.

“Actually Thrones broke the record tonight for most Emmy’s a show has ever won.” Said the man Kit had been talking to.

“Oh, well there you go. I guess you do know what they look like then.” I shrugged as I grabbed my award and moved it to the side of the table. I felt a little unsettled at having my joke not landing the way I had planned but Kit was still smiling as the guy he was with excused himself and left us alone.

“Congratulations on your win.” He said gesturing to my award.

“Thank you.” I smiled, “I keep thinking someone is going to take it off me and that this has all been some big mistake.” I said honestly.

“It’s not. I saw your episode, you were hilarious.” He smiled.

“Thanks.” I smiled, “I just got done talking to Benioff and Weiss, they offered me a part in the variety show you guys are doing for the Red Nose foundation. Said you recommended me for it.” I said.

“Ah, yeah.” He said, seeming suddenly bashful as he rubbed the back of his neck, “I was watching a lot of your stuff on you tube and I just thought you’d be a great addition.” He explained.

I nodded in understanding, “Well thank you. I’m touring for the next couple of months but that’s right before my movie comes out so I should be able to do it.” I told him.

“Really? Well that’s great.” He said, seeming genuinely excited.

There was a moment of awkward silence where the two of us simply sat smiling at each other and I desperately tried to think of something else to say to him. Surely I had fulfilled my favour to Andy by now? Yet, I felt compelled to talk to him a little longer.

“So how do you know Andy?” I asked conversationally.

“We did a movie together. Sort of a mock documentary.” He explained.

“Oh yeah? I’ll have to watch it.” I smiled.

“Don’t. I’m terrible in it.” He said, flushing in embarrassment.

What an odd thing to say. Actors and performers in general were most often the most confident people you would ever meet. Yet Kit seemed to be the exact opposite. He was awkward and obviously self-conscious. It made me curious.

“What makes you say that?” I asked curiously.

“It’s a comedy and I’m not very funny.” He explained.

“I’m sure that’s not true.” I assured him.

“Oh no it is. Comedy is so hard. I don’t know how you do it.” He said pointedly.

“It’s a lot of trial and error. For every ten times I’m trying to be funny, I may only get one laugh.” I explained, though he didn’t look convinced, “Dramatic acting, now that’s hard.” I said seriously, “I dreaded the days on set when I was filming my movie when we were doing serious scenes because I had no idea what to do.”

He was listening to me so intently. I don’t know what it was about him, perhaps his awkward and vulnerable nature, but I found myself revealing more than I normally would.

“I felt like I over acted in all of those scenes. It was terrible.” I revealed.

“Well it’s called ‘drama’ for a reason. Sometimes you have to over act things.” He explained, “But dramatic acting isn’t that hard in my case. I just walk around looking like I’m in a bad mood all the time.” He shrugged.

“Yes I call that a resting bitch face.” I told him.

“A what?” he asked in confusion.

At that I laughed and he joined me.

“Seriously though, I’m really looking forward to seeing your movie with Emma Thompson. I’m a big fan of hers and she says your great.” He said seriously.

“Emma is a darl.” I commented, thinking back to the woman whom had essentially taken me under her wing throughout the filming of out movie together, “she’s got nothing bad to say about anyone.”

“No, I was watching an interview with her and she said that your brilliant in the movie and she’s betting you’ll get award recognition for it.” He said, “She’s actually the reason why I started watching your shows.” He explained.

I blinked in shock, “She is?”

“Yeah, I thought if the genius that is Emma Thompson thinks this girl is something I better see what she’s on about. Next thing I know I’ve been on You Tube for three hours, laughing hysterically.” He told me.

At that I laughed looking down bashfully. It hit me how ironic that was.

“And comedy is so much harder than drama because everyone’s sense of humour is so different.” He continued, “I mean, when I was working with Andy I just did my best to make a fool of myself.”

“Self-deprecation will get you a laugh every time.” I smiled, “But drama is so much harder because you have to go into all that wanky acting stuff.”

“Wanky acting stuff? I’m afraid to ask.” He grinned.

“I took one acting class and when they asked me to breathe through my elbow, I was out. Like I understand acting in the sense of creating characters and creating everything about them, that I can do.” I told him.

“Case in point, your monkey.” He added.

“Yes.” I agreed, “He’s made in china but he sounds like Sean Connery. Its fine.” I said dismissively.

He laughed again.

“But for the life of me I cannot figure out how me somehow breathing through my elbow works. Or throwing a ball with intention? What the hell is that? I’m just throwing a ball for god’s sake.” I said my voice going high in disbelief as I recounted the disastrous experience that was my one and only attempt at an acting class.

“As someone who has gone to drama school, I know exactly what you’re talking about.” He replied.

“And?” I prompted, “How is that helpful?”

“Well it’s about having different tools to help you get out the performance that you want.” He explained.

“And do you use any of those tools?”

“Some. To get the physicality of a character.”

“You see for me, that comes with the costume. I mean, the costume is what the character inhabits so obviously that is going to affect the way they move.” I told him.

“True but it’s good to have a basis to have.” He reasoned.

“So,” I asked, settling down in my seat a little more as I propped my head up with the heel of my hand, my elbow on the table, “Does Jon Snow breathe through his elbow?” I teased.

Surprisingly I actually found myself enjoying my conversation with Kit. I understood that he was a fan of my work, but when he wasn’t stumbling over his words and trying to get out his admiration for me, he was actually quite interesting to talk to.

He laughed, seeming a little more at ease now that I was, “Jon actually breathes through his hands.” He told me.

“He what?” I scoffed.

“He does.” He revealed, “Whenever there is any tension or anything, it’s either built or released in his hands.”

“And that’s an acting choice you’ve made?” I asked.

“Yes.”

“A conscious acting choice?”

“Yes.”

“Wow!” I marvelled at his attention to detail, “See I would never have thought of something like that.”

“Well what do you do when you need to play a particular emotion?” he asked curiously.

“I just try and think of a time when I felt that emotion or something similar and try to replicate that.” I shrugged.

“That’s called emotional recall. It’s an acting technique.” He explained.

“See?” I said, throwing my hands up in disbelief, “I didn’t even know that! I’m such a fraud.” I said, suddenly feeling very inadequate, “You should have this.” I said, shoving my Emmy across the table towards him.

He laughed as he grabbed the trunk of the statue and held it, “Well I’d like to thank the academy… my parents…” he began in a fake posh accent.

“Ok, that’s enough. Give it back.” I said, reaching out for the award but he pulled it out of my reach.

“No it’s mine. You gave it to me.” He said, with a teasing grin on his face.

“Give it back! I defrauded a lot of people to get that.” I said as I leaned across him to reach out and grab the award, placing my hand on his knee as I did to balance myself. Being so close to him, I got a whiff of his musky after shave and the scent of the hair gel he had used. He smelt great.

He laughed as he let me have it and I sat back in my seat, sitting the award in my lap securely. It only occurred to me after I had done the action how flirtatious it could have been construed as, my hand had been on his knee and I’d leaned across him in a way that pressed the side of my chest into his…

If I was prettier, I actually would have considered flirting with him. But I wasn’t. I wasn’t pretty and I was just being funny. That was who I was.

“Seriously though, people go to acting school to learn how to do that. You just do it naturally.” He told me seriously.

“What screwing up my face and crying on cue?” I asked as I smoothed the material of my dress, “That’s not that hard.”

“You’d be surprised.” He told me, “There are a lot of people out there that shouldn’t be actors. Their just pretty faces.” He said seriously.

“Says heart throb.” I quipped.

He laughed and if I wasn’t mistaken, he actually blushed, “I’m serious though. A lot of people just want to become actors for the fame and a lot of people are hired because they are good looking. Case and point.” He said gesturing across the room.

I followed his eye line and saw that he was pointing to my sister, who was looking particularly lovely as she laughed at something James Spader had said.

“Ah yes, the beautiful Carey Mendez. You know she didn’t even have pimples as a teenager?” I asked, turning to look him again.

He had gone white, “Oh god, that’s your sister?”

“Yeah.” I said, he didn’t know that?

“I’m sorry. I wasn’t implying anything…” he stuttered.

“Yeah you were. You were saying that she can’t act and gets hired because she’s good looking. And it’s true. I don’t disagree with you.” I said simply.

“Yeah, but I shouldn’t have been bad mouthing your sister.” He said looking regretful.

“You weren’t saying anything I haven’t said. She can’t act. She’s never taken an acting class in her life, yet she keeps getting hired. It’s not for her talent so it’s got to be for something else.” I shrugged.

He looked uncomfortable so I decided to change the subject.

“Well hey, at least I tried to take an acting class.” I joked, “Key word there is tried.”

“You see, now I’m jealous. You naturally have what takes people years to learn.” He told me.

“Oh please, I’m funny. I couldn’t do real acting to save my life.” I dismissed.

“You looked like you were doing some pretty dramatic scenes in the trailer for your movie.” He said pointedly.

“God, I’m so nervous to see how that thing turns out. Like a part of me doesn’t want to watch myself on screen that’s why I do stand-up because nobody films that anymore. I hate seeing myself on camera. How do you deal with it?” I asked.

“You get used to it.” He shrugged, “When do you get to see the first cut of it?”

“I’m not actually sure.” I said honestly.

“Well hello there!” interrupted a voice.

I turned to see Carey standing next to me, a flirtatious smile of her face as she looked at Kit, “What are you up to little sister?” she asked, not bothering to look at me as she spoke.

I hated when she called me ‘little sister’ it was so diminutive.

“Just discussing Pythagoras.” I said dryly, “What are you doing?” I asked, though it was pretty obvious what she was doing as she batted her eyelids at Kit.

“Well I came over to see what you are doing.” She said sweetly as she continued to stare at Kit, “Are you up for sharing any spoilers on what’s happening next season on Game of Thrones?” she asked.

“What do you want to know?” asked Kit seeming wary.

“I don’t know. Do you have another shirtless scene?” she giggled.

“And on that note, I’m going to get a drink. See you later Kit.” I said as I slipped off the stool and headed off towards the bar.

If he said goodbye, I didn’t hear him as I went to the bar and ordered a shot. I couldn’t help but be a little annoyed. I had been talking to an attractive guy and he had actually been paying attention to me. It had felt nice. Then Carey swept in and I knew it was because she hated seeing me get any sort of attention at all.

Siblings. It wasn’t enough to fight for our parent’s affection growing up, now she had to fight for media and male attention? I was so over it.

I downed my shot and then made my way over to the familiar Big Bang Theory cast, “Hey Johnny! Look what I have!” I called, shoving my Emmy in his face, “You jealous?”

“I’m not jealous.” He laughed.

“You are. You’re so jealous. Your lime green jello and you can’t even admit it.” I teased.

He laughed harder.

I wasn’t sure how it had happened, as I had been drinking, but I ended up on the dance floor with Sarah Hyland, Ariel Winter, Maisie Williams, Sophie Turner and Kaley. We were having a competition as to who could do the most ridiculous ‘Dad Moves’.

So far I was winning, all the girls were in stiches laughing as I demonstrated not only ‘the sprinkler’ but ‘the shopping troller’ as well.

This was where I was the most comfortable; making people laugh. I may have been making a fool of myself, but I was making people laugh and I enjoyed that. I loved to make people laugh.

“Hey Kit!” called Sophie as a dark figure approached us, “You should get your dad over here to do some real dad moves.” She said as Kit joined us on the dance floor.

“Nah, he and my mum went home a little while ago.” He explained with a smile.

“You brought yours parents to the Emmy’s? That’s so cute.” Cooed Kaley.

“Come on Kit! Show us your Dad moves!” encouraged Maisie, “No one has been better than Bridgette yet.”

“Stir the pot!” I said as I moved my hips in a circular motion, “Then add the salt. Add the pepper.” I said as I shook my hands.

They howled with laughter.

“I just do the hair move.” Said Kit as he mimed licking the palms of his hands then smoothing them over his hair.

I laughed. I don’t know what possessed me to do it, but I stepped forward and grabbed his hand and pulled it above his head and motioned for him to twirl. He did a small spin, laughing as he did. I then pulled him into my arms and did a small dip before I set him back on his feet.

He’d turned red again and I simply giggled along with the rest of the girls.

“Hey we’re gonna go do some shots, you coming?” Kaley asked Kit as she grabbed my hand and wound her fingers through mine.

“Sure.” He smiled.

“Urgh, I hate the legal drinking age in America.” Said Maisie.

“I know right?” grumbled Sophie.

“Shut up! You’re taller than I will ever be. Content yourself with that.” I told her pointedly.

Kit laughed loudly.

Once we were at the bar, Sarah, Kaley, Kit and myself ended up doing shots with Rami Malek, Eric Stonestreet, the old guy from Downton Abbey whose name I couldn’t remember, I think he played the dad…

“Oh god, I can’t do anymore.” Said Kit after we had our third shot in a row.

“Keep up you pussy.” I commented.

Everyone laughed as our fourth drink was poured. I turned to Kit, grabbing my glass, I clinked it with his and he smiled before we downed them once again.

“How can you drink so much?” demanded Sarah, “You’re the same size as me.”

“She’s Australian. They’re all alcoholics over there.” Said Rami.

“True.” I said as I did my fifth shot.

“I’m out.” Called Kit as he gripped the bar, seeming unsteady on his feet

“Uh oh. You want me to call you a cab?” I grinned.

“I actually think I’m gonna be sick.” He said as he swayed.

I could tell he was serious, he’d gone pale and his eyes were unfocused. I practically threw Kaley my Emmy as I wrapped an arm around Kit, “Come on.” I encouraged as I guided him towards the toilet.

I had no reservations about pushing open the door to the men’s room and practically pouring him into a stall. The moment he saw the toilet he was violently sick. I of course leaned over him and held his hair back.

I couldn’t help but feel a little bad for him. I had been the one egging him on, when he clearly couldn’t handle anymore and because of that I felt the need to look after him while he was sick, even though I barely knew him.

Once he was finished, he slumped against the side of the stall. I crouched down and grabbed some toilet paper and wiped his mouth, “There you go.” I said, smiling sympathetically, he looked so vulnerable sitting there.

“You’re so pretty.” He told me.

I snorted in amusement, “Ok, now I know your drunk.”

He grumbled in disagreement.

“Come on, do you think you can get up?” I asked as I stood up.

He nodded.

Stretching my hand out, I pulled him to his feet and we stepped out of the stall.

“I’m so embarrassed.” Kit mumbled as he went to the sink.

“Don’t be. No one saw you. This can be our secret.” I said, leaning against the sink counter.

He sent me a shy smile and I couldn’t help but smile back, the was something so honest and earnest about the way he smiled at me. For some reason, he had never been more attractive to me than he was in that moment because in an industry where everyone lied, he just seemed so honest.

But before I could ponder that thought, the door to the bathroom opened and a man stood in the doorway, “Hey! You can’t be in here.” He said pointing an accusing finger at me.

I pulled a face at Kit, “My bad.” I said before I scurried out of there.

I had intended to stand outside and wait for Kit to make sure he was ok, but Carey came over to tell me that our car was here.

“Can we wait like, five minutes?” I pleaded.

“No. I want to go now.” She said firmly.

Sighing in defeat, as I knew it was no good to argue with her, I went to the bar, collected my Emmy from Kaley and left.

#chapters #fanfiction #fanfic #real person fanfiction #Broken smile #Kit Harington #Emmy awards

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