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#i am just BRAINDUMPING on the train after work now
tsukana · 8 months
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theres another universe where q!phil WASNT left behind by forever and bad for that final investigation, where q!phil was there for that federation office argument/explanation, and im so sad we didnt get to see it. Because it absolutely wouldve such an interesting turn to what we got. because we have-
forever, stuck between bad & baghera, whom he still considers himself a trio with, and tubbo, the drive of the investigation and stunning verbal proof of a kidnapping, but no physical. in addition to the personal aspects, he is still president, and might consider that part an obligation of some objectivity
baghera, who has promised bad not to tell, but dont mistake her personal support and loyalty to bad in this for a support of his actions in capturing and keeping WB011 locked away underground. she may be complicit now in onr aspect, but not supportive
phil, who is there having promised tubbo to back him, but dont mistake his support for tubbo as support for the federation. phil who respects bad and knows he would do anything to keep all of the eggs safe and bring them back. phil who bad in turn respects for taking in an egg who has become his own (he gets the feeling) and knows would do anything to keep them safe.
i dont remember where i was going with this fully but like. i feel like the addition to someone who in the conversation was solidly on q!tubbos side out of personal loyalty the way a!baghera was for q!bad wouldve made the scene a lot more even? if not interesting if only because i genuinely cant figure to what extent phil mightve joined in from cc!phil being tired af, or phil definitely being more anti-federation than ambivalent like tubbo is (aside from flying in the face of create rules and other general limitations), or also just because we definitely havent seen the full impact of cucurucho and the federation fucking gaslighting q!phil into thinking what happened with the birdhouse was a dream, and literally still feeling like he's unable to tell apart if something is reality or a dream
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jellyjays · 6 months
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transfem kuai liang headcanon
hi. as a precursor to this whole post, i'm going to give the forwarning that i am absolutely batshit insane about this. if one could call an avid fan of something 'down the rabbit hole', then i am in the core of the fucking planet of this. i am thinking about her at all hours of the day. i have a several thousand WC braindump doc that i still need to elaborate on. with that said, if you're willing to give a look-see, jump down the rabbit hole with me as i give you the rundown.
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i have many, many, many words about her. many of them. but i'll try to summarize my reasoning for this particular headcanon because it's actually much much deeper than the initial vibes.
THE DEEPER REASONING
kuai as a character seems really closed-off and disconnected. especially when we first meet him. he's duty first, no-nonsense. he's quiet. and then we get to know him more, and to know bi-han more, and there's this... sense of unease, somewhat? like bi-han, we can see that he is standing on firm foundations of his ideals. we know what he wants. we know who he is. he stays true to these ideals, even by betraying his brothers to join the side of shang tsung and quan chi. he is a character who knows what he wants and we can predict his actions based on it. on the other hand, in contrast, kuai liang seems almost... unstable, in a sense, and adrift. we only really get to know the fact that he valued his father's teachings. and bi-hans betrayal seems to throw him even more adrift.
and being adrift and unstable on his foundations is a trait i see VERY often in my own experience and in the experience of my transfem friends (and here we hit my biggest point on why i headcanon kuai liang as transfem-- the sheer number of parallels between his story and trans experiences).
when bi-han betrays the lin kuei, and in turn, kuai and smoke, kuai has no issues taking down SEVERAL fighters along with general shao-- and you can sense the rage that fuels it (yet another parallel with trans experience). that feeling of 'i put faith in you, i trusted you,', and in this case, 'i followed you, i am who i am because of you, i changed myself for you, and you repay me with this?'
it's unbelievable pain and anger and betrayal, and though he eventually calms enough that he goes back to his quiet, calculative self, it's earth-shaking. this parallels a lot of the feeling, in the trans experience, of the betrayal you feel when your loved ones, the ones you trusted, you changed yourself for, turn to transphobia and terf rhetoric. turn to the beliefs you know hurt people (earthrealm, or your trans friends) and hurt you, and make you their new target.
i'm sad we don't get much focus on kuai liang after that chapter of the story-- i'd pay good money to get an expansion of his story. we know at the very least that he goes on with smoke to form the shirai ryu, and train the young hanzo hasashi, but that tells us nothing, so i don't have a lot to work with. but that gives a lot of wiggle room when making guesses at his character.
reviewing what we know, i reiterate that parallels make kuai liang's character incredibly readable as trans-coded. and i will say now that i know nothing about him screams 'fem!', but i see his character as transfem because of other things-- once again, parallels. kuai liang, as a character, is very clearly honor-driven. he values, above all, his family. his lost father, his bonds with his brothers. his clan. and on top of that, none of his character reads... as 'man' to me. kuai just doesn't read as someone who identifies with a man to me. by that, i mean that he does not seem... comfortable or confident in his masculinity. and that disconnect, once again, is a DIRECT parallel to trans experiences.
THE FUN STUFF
ok now that i've gotten that out of my system i can tell you about the more fun headcanons i have around her heheh
uses she/he pronouns
smoke gave her a golden scorpion-shaped hair claw and she uses it ALL THE TIME.
she likes to wear eyeliner in everyday life and do fancy eyeliner for battle
he and smoke have bonding time while smoke braids her hair. she very frequently falls asleep during braiding time.
smoke is also her biggest supporter, but hanzo is very frequently fighting for the title.
i will be adding more as i think about it. this is all for today. i hope you enjoyed this post. ok byeeeee
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wild-ditto-appeared · 3 years
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Duelist Kingdom but with Ditto
What would Yu-Gi-Oh! (OG) be like if Ditto was there from the beginning? How would Ditto have gotten there? Why would Ditto be there?
Here are some Sylvia braindumps from my most recent pacing session:
Ditto arrives on Duelist Kingdom Island, helpless and afraid and very VERY confused. There are no animals on this island, no trees bearing fruit or bushes with berries or, frankly, most food of ANY kind except the fish that swim down the streams--and Ditto is very much an herbivore, thank you very much.
So Ditto quite frankly, nearly starves to death on that damn island. Then it's startled by the sound of fireworks.
No, the Duelist Kingdom Tournament hasn't begun yet--won't begin for quite some time, actually--Pegasus just wanted a private show of fireworks that day.
Ditto Transforms and makes its way to the direction from which the fireworks came from--and when it gets close enough, it spots the giant castle (thanks to Ditto's small size, it's a lot harder to spot the castle when surrounded by tall-ass trees, so it needs to be much closer to be able to spot it on its own).
For story-telling reasons, Ditto never considered Transforming into a Flying-type Pokemon and just. Surveying the land. Like a sensible Pokemon. It was too young and never had to really do that before, so it wasted a lot of energy out there.
When it finally trudges all the way to the castle, sometimes Transforming and sometimes not because at this point Ditto is really really tired, Ditto stumbles onto the brick steps of the castle--not the front ones, mind you, but one of the rear entrances/exits meant for guards. And it can't get into the castle, so after considering giving up, it scales the wall as an Aipom, flips over onto the wall's walkway, and de-Transforms, using up the last of its energy before it falls asleep. This is where Ditto is found by some of Pegasus' guards.
They... don't know what to do with Ditto at first. So they grab it and lock it in a dark black box with only a little hole to breathe out of, then go on their way to lock it in the dungeons, never to be seen again when Pegasus finds them and asks what's in the box.
The guards tell him they found something suspicious on the balcony and they would throw it in the dungeons for trespassing. Pegasus analyzes the interior of the box with his Millennium Eye and ultimately decides Ditto is harmless, asking that the box is handed over to him. The guards, knowing better than to question him, oblige and go back to their respective duties.
Pegasus frees Ditto from its little prison, but Ditto is asleep still, clearly hurt and worn. At a loss for what to do, Pegasus panics slightly, ordering all sorts of food from his chefs. The whole castle is in panic. "Is Pegasus ordering a feast of some kind? Who is coming over that's so important? Why wasn't anyone notified?" Really, Pegasus just wants to know what Ditto will eat and he has nothing to offer of his own except wine and cheese.
Although lots of food is made, Ditto only eats the fruits and vegetables, and even then it's mostly the fruits and berries whose plates are wiped clean when Ditto finishes eating. So... all of that meat and fish and other such things are... sort of wasted.
Pegasus doesn't seem to really care, though. Ditto is sleeping with a full belly now, and he allows it to stay the night. Then another. Then another.
Fully befriended, Pegasus and Ditto become close enough friends that he even refers to Ditto as "his pet," which it doesn't seem to mind. Even after Ditto has shown off its transformative abilities--which in fact makes it appeal to Pegasus even more--Ditto is accepted wholeheartedly into the castle and treated with almost the same amount of respect by his guards as Master Pegasus himself.
Then the Duelist Kingdom happens and something changes in Pegasus. He's suddenly a lot moodier, a lot more serious, a lot less jovial than Ditto is used to him being. He seems to carry the weight of guilt and distress on him at all times. Ditto tries to relieve it, but Pegasus brushes off its attempts. Eventually, four duelists make it to the castle--plus one Seto Kaiba. For the duration of the duel, Pegasus orders the guards to keep a close eye on Ditto to make sure it doesn't leave its little box, so that Ditto doesn't have to see what happens to Kaiba when he loses.
After Kaiba has lost his soul, Pegasus allows the guards to release Ditto--and Ditto had obediently listened to Pegasus because it trusted him, thinking that he would not make me do this if it wasn't important. When it was allowed outside of its box, Ditto went straight to Pegasus to cuddle, because it had been scared something serious was happening. Pegasus tried to reassure it, but his voice was still heavy.
Ditto was present, however, for the finals. For Mai against Yugi and Joey against the "In America" guy because I don't feel like looking up his name right this second. Ditto sensed when Yugi's Millennium Puzzle activated and when he switched into Yami. Ditto then realized--wait, why does that somewhat feel familiar? A little different, but still familiar in a way.
And then it realizes that other similar feeling had been coming from Pegasus this whole time: the Millennium Eye.
But Pegasus was nice, and although the power Yami wielded was frightening to Ditto, he didn't seem to be doing anything bad with it... well, yet. So Ditto gave Yami the benefit of the doubt.
Then the final duel, Yami versus Pegasus. At first, it was fine. But when they reached the second phase of the duel, which took place in the Shadow Realm, Ditto felt BAD VIBES. LOTS OF BAD VIBES.
But not from the Puzzle. No, they were coming from Pegasus. From the Eye.
And for the first time, Ditto grew afraid of its friend. It grew afraid of its caretaker and followed Tea and the others when they ran to Yugi's side of the duel to try and reach him. Ditto tried headbutting the bubble headfirst as a Dreepy, as if being missile-shaped and going as fast as possible would break the barrier. It didn't, and Ditto nearly fell before Tea managed to catch it.
And it started to cry, because that was scary. Where did Fancy Man and Spiky Man go? Why was Fancy Friend fighting? Why did it feel so WRONG and BAD?
When the duel was over and Pegasus lost, Ditto flew straight to him as a bird, ignoring Yugi's friends' protests. It snuggled with Pegasus, buried itself in his hair, nuzzled his face, everything it possibly could to ask if he was okay, if the bad stuff was over.
Pegasus barely responded to Ditto, merely plucking it from his shoulders and carefully setting it down on his dueling field. With a sad smile, Pegasus spoke--half to Ditto, because his eye was trained on it and half to Yugi, who won the duel.
"Very well, Yugi. You win. I am a man of my word. I will release everyone I have captured."
Ditto was in shock, hearing this. Its feathers fluffed up, it stared at him incredulously, its eyes trained on him and almost shaking, as if to ask, "You... you had people captured?" And suddenly Ditto realized what the duel was about.
Yugi, Tea, and the others saw Ditto's reaction--didn't miss it for the world, despite having been taken aback when they first learned of Pegasus' transforming little pet--and felt sad for the little fella. Ditto truly cared about Pegasus, truly loved him, and now, like many others, Pegasus had managed to hurt Ditto too.
Pegasus told Ditto that he knew it would most likely not forgive him for what he'd done, that he wouldn't blame it if it wanted to leave, then left Ditto with that decision while he went to release the souls he'd captured.
Pegasus didn't come back.
Ditto witnessed the guards giving Yugi his prize money and title, and when they demanded to know that everyone whose soul Pegasus stole was okay, the guards simply said that Pegasus was handling it. Ditto was still confused, still lost.
What... what now?
When Yugi and the others went to check on him to make sure he did, in fact, keep his word, Ditto went with them. It wanted to know what happened to its caretaker, its friend.
Pegasus wasn't there. In fact, he was missing from the entire castle.
When Ditto found out about this, it cried. With Yugi and friends as witnesses, Ditto sobbed and grieved for Pegasus because he was gone. He was gone and Ditto hadn't even been given the opportunity to answer with its decision.
Ditto was there when it heard the reason why Pegasus had done all of this. Ditto was there when Yugi and friends met Kaiba and escorted Mokuba back to him safely and soundly. Ditto was there when they moved to leave, but Yugi hesitated.
Yugi turned to Ditto, pitying or sympathetic or empathetic or whatever, but he was clearly concerned for Ditto when he bent down and extended a hand in offer.
"I know Pegasus is gone now, and... and we'll never be him, but... maybe you can find companionship in us until Pegasus comes back," he offered Ditto.
And Ditto, with nowhere left to go and no other friends to turn to, nodded and accepted Yugi's offer, burying itself in his shirt to grieve. Then, they take the ship home.
Let me know if you wanna know how Battle City should go with Ditto, too. Just something I thought of earlier today. I'm gonna be real, it probably doesn't sound that great, but I don't think it sounds like trash either, sooo... //shrug// maybe it works? What do you all think?
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isolavirtuosa · 3 years
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Cass & Dean's Infinite Playlist 6-10
[fanfiction] Dean/Castiel
Canon Compliant Coda
The one where Dean makes a lot of mixtapes.
Parts 6-10/26 under the cut.  Previous parts here. Referenced songs playlist on Spotify.
- 6 -
“Hey, Cass, you wanna go for a drive-”
“Yes,” he said agreeably, appearing out of thin air.  Then his nose wrinkled.  “Motörhead?”
“What’s wrong with Motörhead?”
“Nothing, it’s just… loud,” Cass said, loosening his tie.
“You say that a lot,” I said, “but you know that we could just turn down the volume?”
“No, not loud like that,” he said, shaking his head.  “It is… difficult-to-have-a-conversation loud.”
“I don’t really see the difference, but okay, what do you want to listen to?” I asked.
Cass seemed to freeze.  “…me…?”
“Yes, Castiel, Angel of the Lord, what do you want to listen to?” I asked, nodding my head towards the cassette collection.
“I can… choose?” he asked, sounding genuinely confused.
“Yeah, sure,” I said with a shrug.
“But I am… the passenger,” he said, baffled.
“So you want to listen to Iggy Pop?”
“No, I… I mean, the passenger is to shut his cakehole, is he not?”
“Generally, yes,” I agreed.  “But just this once.”
Cass seemed flustered.
I had just said it offhandedly.  It wasn’t supposed to be a big deal.
The way Cass was reverently flipping through the tapes seemed like A Big Deal.
“I get final veto power,” I mumbled, trying to regain some semblance of my authority.
Cass hummed his assent, then pulled out a tape.
I held my hand out to him and he placed it into my waiting hand.  I felt the warmth of his fingertips, then held up the tape for inspection.  “You really like Bowie, huh?”
“Yes.”
“Okay,” I said, ejecting Motörhead and putting in The Man Who Sold the World.
Cass rolled down his window, letting the wind blow against his face as he watched the passing scenery.
Our conversations always meandered, about Cass’s work, about what was going on in my little patch heaven, about the past.  I felt relaxed, listening to Cass’s low voice talk about organizing angel tree planters floating over heavy guitar and a cacophony of drums.
He paused when the title track came on, his mouth tilting into a little smile.  “I like this song.”
“Yeah?”
“Yes, it’s hard to put my finger on it, but… it makes me think of you.”
“Me?”
“Yes.”
“Really?”
“Yes.
“Did I sell the world?”
“You might have.”
“Huh.”
“I like the Nirvana cover, too.”
“Really, Cass?  Grunge?” I scoffed.
“Kurt Cobain was an exceptional poet,” he informed me.
“Oh, man, are you trying to recommend music to me now?” I asked, amused.
“You know Dean, they did not stop making music after the 1980s.”
“Might as well have.”
Cass exhaled a little laugh, turning to look out the window again.  He started singing quietly to the chorus, “who knows?  Not me.  We never lost control.  You’re face to face with the man who sold the world.”
I liked listening to my tone-deaf angel sing, joining him in the final lines.
When the tape finished, I ejected it, then nodded my head to the cassettes again.  “What’s next?”
“I can choose again?” Cass asked, surprised.
“Pick something good.”
He grinned happily as he started going through all the tapes.
- 7 -
I drummed my fingers on the steering wheel, rocking out to Van Halen.
Cass held out the bag of donuts he’d brought for our drive and I took one, taking a bite and continuing to mouth the words.
“I like sprinkles,” he decided, staring very hard at the strawberry donut he was eating.  “They do not seem like they add anything of value, and yet without them, the donut is lesser.”
“Rainbow sprinkles for Cass, check,” I said, going back to singing.  “I can barely see the road from the heat comin' off of it.  Ah, I reach down between my legs.  Ease the seat back.”
“Apparently there are many people who think this song is called Animal,” Cass put in.
“But it is actually called…?”
“Panama,” he said, beaming at me.
“Look at our little Cassie, all grown up,” I said, reaching over and patting him on the shoulder.
“The younger angels all come to me to learn about the ancient music of the 1970s and 80s,” he said proudly.
“Ancient?” I repeated.
“Quite,” he agreed.
“Anciently awesome,” I muttered.
“Are songs about strippers… anciently awesome?” Cass asked, his tone implying that they might not be.
“Strippers are awesome,” I declared.
Cass snorted at that.  “Dean, your performative masculinity is unnecessary.”
“Performative… what the hell is that supposed to mean?” I growled at him.
He shrugged, a bizarrely human gesture on him.  “If your idea of a good time is watching scantily clad women struggling to pay their bills while dealing with issues of paternal abandonment-”
“-which I do-”
“-then you should spend your time in heaven doing that instead of driving around in your Impala with me.”
“I can do both,” I protested.
“When have you…” Cass trailed off, squinting at me.  “Dean, I think you need feminism.”
“You sound like Sam,” I groaned.
“No, our tones are significantly different.”
I just rolled my eyes.
“I am going to make you a mixtape,” Cass decided.
“Oh?”
“Yes.  Of only female artists.”
Something inside of me rebelled against the idea of it.  But another part of me thought about that catchy Taylor Swift song that I couldn’t quite get out of my head.  “I don’t need weepy chick music,” I said dismissively.
“Deaaaaan,” he sighed heavily, like my name was ten syllables long.
“Do you even know how to make a mixtape?”
“I am very good at figuring things out.”
We all knew that wasn’t true, but I didn’t say anything more, and the next time Cass appeared in my car, he was proudly waving a cassette at me that read in very tiny lettering, ‘A Mixtape of Various Female Artists Made by Castiel for Dean as a Means of Edification'.
I shook my head at him.
He just grinned.
“You gonna put it in?” I asked.
“No,” he said, adding the tape to my collection.  “You should listen to it alone.”
“That sounds ominous,” I said with a snort.
“I just mean that your reaction will be more authentic.”
“Okay,” I said, squinting at him.  Like I was performative.
“Can we listen to Led Zeppelin today?” he asked.
“Um, we can always listen to Led Zeppelin,” I said.  “Whaddya wanna hear?”
“We could start at Led Zeppelin and proceed chronologically?” he suggested.
“I like the way you think,” I said, feeling around for the tape and then pushing it into the deck.
After Cass had left, I could feel his mixtape sitting there, staring at me.
I glared at it.
What had Cass said?  That I needed feminism?
This was going to be so annoying.
I pulled the tape out and pushed it into the deck.
The guitar that greeted my ears was familiar.
“Busted flat in Baton Rouge, waiting for a train.  When I was feeling nearly faded as my jeans.  Bobby thumbed a diesel down, just before it rained.”
I felt a little smile tugging at my lips.  I could respect some Janis Joplin, and the fact that Cass had chosen to open up his mixtape with Me and Bobby McGee actually had me a little impressed with his mixtape-making skills.
Then the song ended, and I could hear Cass’s faraway-sounding voice in the back of the recording.  “Did it record the song?”
I cracked up, listening to him struggle to figure out how to stop the recording before putting on the next song.  I had no idea what kind of equipment he’d decided to use for this, but the sound quality was a little scratchy, suggesting he might have just been holding up a microphone to a tape player.
Then the twangy guitar of Fleetwood Mac suddenly filled the speakers.
I listened to the tape from start to finish.  There were some random moments of Cass mumbling to himself, trying to figure out what he was doing.  There was also a very loud crash in the middle of Patti Smith, followed by some cursing that had me laughing so hard I had tears pricking at the corners of my eyes.
And at the end of it all, I couldn’t help but wonder how the hell Cass had known enough to pick out each of those songs.  Sure, Metatron had braindumped him with a bunch of pop culture references, but there was a depth to his choices.  It was obvious he was mostly trying to choose songs he thought that I would like, with rockers like Suzi Quatro and Heart.  But then there was Joni Mitchell, which was just so Cass to me.
“I am on a lonely road and I am traveling, traveling, traveling, traveling.  Looking for something, what can it be?”
It was kind of beautiful, and I found myself rewinding it and listening again.
[Listen to Castiel's full C46 mixtape 'A Mixtape of Various Female Artists Made by Castiel for Dean as a Means of Edification' on Spotify.]
- 8 -
Me and Cass sat on the hood of the Impala, drinking beers while Black Sabbath blasted through the speakers.
Cass suddenly leaned back, staring up at the sky.  “The stars are beautiful here,” he observed.
“Yeah, no ambient light in heaven,” I said, laying back beside him.
“Shooting star,” Cass pointed out happily.
I was looking at him instead of the sky.  I looked back up, but it was already gone.  “Haven’t you seen a million of them?”
“And I hope to see a million more.”
“How can you be like that?” I asked, shaking my head.  I sat up again and took a pull from my beer.
“Like what?” he asked.
“I dunno,” I said.  “Hopeful?”
“Is it hopeful to enjoy the beauty of my father’s creation?”
“I got no idea.”
“What’s on your mind, Dean?”
“Whaddya mean?”
“You just seem like you want to talk about something,” he said, sitting up next to me.
“Not really,” I said with a shrug.
He stared at me for a long moment, then looked away with his own shrug.  “Don’t tell me, then.”
“Don’t be like that,” I complained, nudging him with my elbow.
“Then talk to me,” he said with a scowl.
“Hey, Cass,” I said.  “How you doin’?”
“Crappy,” he responded, crossing his arms over his chest.
“Don’t be like that,” I repeated, nudging him harder.  That of course did nothing because he was an immovable lump of celestial intent.
“I am just being myself.”
“A grumpy-ass angel?”
“A grumpy-ass angel,” he agreed sarcastically.
“I like when you’re a happy, non-grumpy-ass angel,” I said, looking him in the eye.
“I am very happy, Dean,” he said, staring back unbothered.
“Why?” I asked before I could help it.
His expression took on a more thoughtful countenance.  “Well, to be happy is to be ‘characterized by well-being and contentment’,” he said, like he was reading from the dictionary.  “Heaven is still a work in progress, but it has been greatly transformed by Jack, and I am able to be a part of that.  I derive great satisfaction from my work.”
“And that’s enough?” I asked.
“No, it’s not enough,” he said, shaking his head.  “Work is just one part of life.”
I found myself chewing on my bottom lip.
“I have my friends and my family,” he continued, leaning in a little closer and trying to maintain eye contact.  “When my work is finished, I can visit with them, go for drives with my best friend.”
“And that’s… good enough?” I asked.
Cass gave me a scrutinizing look.  “Are we talking about me…?”
“Yes, we’re talking about you, who else would we be talking about?” I grumbled, feeling annoyed for some reason.
“Dean.”
I looked at him.
He looked at me.
I looked away.
“I find great satisfaction in my personal life,” he finally said.  “And I am enjoying my new hobby immensely.”
“Hobby?”
“Earth music,” he explained, his expression softening into a smile.  “I want to listen to it all.”
“Yeah?” I said.  “That’s a lotta music, Cass.”
He nodded happily.
“So me makin’ you mixtapes… that makes you happy?” I asked, weighing the words out before I spoke.
“Yes, Dean, so very much,” he said sincerely.  “It’s like you’re giving me a piece of your soul with every song.”
“Um, I don’t think it’s quite that deep.”
“Music is truly powerful.”
“Not that powerful.”
“And yet…”
I let him have the last word, shaking my head and taking a drink.
“Dean, are you happy?” he asked quietly.
“Yeah, sure,” I said with a shrug.  “Ya know, for a dead guy.”
Cass sighed very loudly.
I gave him my most charming grin.
“You are in heaven,” he said to me.  “You are supposed to be experiencing the ultimate form of contentment.”
“I am,” I said, knocking our shoulders together.  I realized he was starting to get upset, and I didn’t want that.  I liked Happy Cass, as unsettling and foreign as he was.  “I am experiencing many forms of contentment right now.”
He looked at me.
I let my hand drop to his knee, resting there.  “I’ve got my baby, I’ve got my beer, I’ve got my tunes, and I’ve got my angel.”
That got him to half-smile.
I squeezed his knee.  “I’m okay, Cass.”
“I wish that you were more than okay,” he told me.
“How much more okay do I need to be?” I asked, rolling my eyes and reclaiming my hand as I took a drink.
He just looked at me.
I raised an eyebrow at him.
“Can we listen to something else?” he asked abruptly.
“Too loud?”
“Yes.”
“Put in whatever you want,” I said, nodding my head back towards the car.
He reached into his pocket and pulled out a tape, smiling at me hopefully.
“What’s that?” I asked, holding out my hand.
He passed it to me.
“Joni Mitchell?” I asked, raising an eyebrow.
“Blue is a masterpiece,” he informed me.
I looked at him.
“You said whatever I want.”
“Yeah, yeah,” I said, handing it back to him.
Cass looked pleased as he slid down off the hood and headed back into the car.
Ozzy Osbourne’s voice cut out, and suddenly the night was quiet.  It was only a moment, and then Joni Mitchell’s acoustic guitar kicked in.
“I really like this song,” he told me as he climbed back up on the hood.
“It’s alright,” I said.  “For chick music,” I couldn’t help but add.
“Dean, there is no such thing as chick music.”
“Uh, it’s music made by chicks.”
“So music made by men is dick music?”
I spit out my beer.
Cass shrugged, playing it off like he was just making an observation.  Like he didn’t know exactly what to say to make me laugh.  “I might like chick better than dick,” he decided.
I was dying.
Cass smiled a happy, pleased smile.
I slung my arm around his shoulder and drank my beer, contentedly listening to the haunting sound of Joni Mitchell’s voice.
- 9 -
“This album is a revelation,” Cass informed me.
“Really, Cass?” I asked incredulously.  “Beyoncé?”
“Queen Bey, yes,” he said with a sincere nod.
“Oh, is this a monarchy?” I asked.
Cass sighed loudly.  “Be quiet and listen.”
I was quiet, but I couldn’t guarantee that I was listening.  “What is the point of sampling?” I grumbled.  “Come up with your own music.”
“Sampling is like a storyteller passing down the oral history of one generation down to the next,” Cass explained, using that voice that sounded like he was talking to a child but usually meant he was talking to me.  “It is actually incredibly intricate and beautiful when done well.”
“I don’t know, Cass, I don’t think Andy Williams reggae is for me.”
“Listen to the words,” he growled at me.
I tried.  “I’m just not into jilted lover chick music.”
Cass straight up scowled at me.
I groaned.  This was going to be a long ride.
Then something caught my ear.
“…is that Zepp?!”
Cass gave me a haughty look.  “Funny how excited you get at hearing a lowly ‘sample’.”
“Zepp rules,” I said with a shrug.
“You should try being more open-minded, Dean.”
“I’m very open-minded,” I said incredulously.
“Because you like that one Taylor Swift song?”
I opened my mouth, but nothing came out.
Cass ignored me and started singing along.
I decided to ignore him, too.
We got through a few more tracks that had me really thinking this wasn’t an album for a middle-aged white guy, but then out of nowhere there was a country song blasting through the speakers and Cass had gone quiet, touching my arm.  “Listen,” was all he said.
“Came into this world daddy's little girl.”
“So relatable,” I mumbled, and Cass pinched me.  “Ow!”
“And daddy made a soldier out of me.”
That gave me pause.
“Daddy made me dance and daddy held my hand.”
Losing me again…
“And daddy liked his whisky with his tea and we rode motorcycles.  Blackjack, classic vinyl.  Tough girl is what I had to be.”
I swallowed.
“He said take care of your mother, watch out for your sister.”
‘Watch out for Sammy,’ Dad’s voice echoed in my ears.
“Oh, my daddy said shoot.”
‘All right, if somethin' tries to bust in?’ Dad asked.
‘Shoot first, ask questions later,’ I found myself answering.
Cass didn’t say anything for the rest of the song.
I hit the ‘stop’ button.
His head tilted as he gazed at me, waiting.
“The fuck was that?” I finally ground out.
He blinked at me.
“I didn’t like it,” I said abruptly.
A frown tugged at Cass’s mouth.  “I’m sorry, Dean.  I did not mean to upset you.”
“Who’s upset?” I growled, speeding up.
“You are,” he said, like he was pointing out the obvious.
“Whatever.”
I almost jumped out of my skin when Cass put his hand on my arm again.
“Sorry,” he said softly.  “I didn’t know that things between you and John were still so… unresolved.”
“Dad and I are fine,” I lied, and no one believed me.
Cass left his hand on my arm, and after a while he reclaimed his Beyoncé tape and put in some Metallica.
- 10 -
Cass left the damn tape mixed in with my collection.
I kept rewinding it, listening again and again.
“Oh, my daddy said shoot.  Oh, my daddy said shoot.”
Cass caught me, appearing in my passenger seat out of nowhere without the customary invitation.
I hit ‘eject’, and neither of us said anything about it.  “What do you want to listen to?” I asked.
“Driver picks the music,” Cass said.
I shrugged.  “Fish out some Lynyrd Skynyrd.”
He did so, pushing in their debut album.
I started singing along to I Ain’t the One.
This was what we did.  Except, usually I called Cass.
“What are you doing here, anyway?” I asked.
“Hm?” he said, looking away from the window to face me.  “Oh, I just wanted to see you.  I hope that’s okay.”
“Of course,” I said.  “You don’t need an invitation.”
“You have said that before, so I thought… I thought I might take you up on it.”
“Good.”
Cass leaned back more comfortably in his seat, rolling up his sleeves to his elbows.  He’d been taking off the trench coat and the suit jacket more and more often lately.  “Sam said the same thing, but I didn’t know that kitchens were a place for sexual intercourse.”
I slow blinked.  “I’m sorry, what?”
“Sam told me to stop by any time,” he said.  “Then he told me to knock first.”
“Wait, wait, so Sammy was hitting it on the kitchen table?”
“He wasn’t hitting anything,” Cass said, squinting at me.
“Cass, come on, you mean to tell me that you still haven’t figured out the art of the sexual innuendo?”
“Sam and Eileen were… in a compromising situation on the kitchen counter,” he explained.
“Nice,” I said agreeably.  “Good for Sammy.”
“Sam was not quite as enthusiastic about the situation,” Cass said, shaking his head.  “At least Eileen thought it was funny.”
I leaned back against my headrest, chuckling.  “Eileen is so cool, how did she ever end up with my dorky brother?”
“Opposites attract?” Cass suggested.
“Apparently,” I said.  “So you got a real eyeful?”
“I saw more of Sam than I ever wanted to, if that’s what you’re asking,” he said.
I cracked up.  “Gross, man.”
“Indeed.”
“Pick up any new techniques?” I asked, waggling my eyebrows at him.  “Knowing Sammy, probably not…”
“Sex techniques?” he asked, making a face at me.
“Yeah, man,” I said.  “Never know when some lovely lady- or uh… dude, uh… might, ya know, walk into your life.”
“I am not interested in having sex.”
“Dude, come on,” I said.  “You don’t ever get the urge…?”
“No.”
“Cass, you’re killing me here.”
“I don’t know why it bothers you so much,” he said with a shrug.  “Your sexual activity decreased significantly after the whole Mark of Cain skulduggery.”
I was scandalized.  “I did not-” and then I thought about it.  “How would you know?” I blustered, deciding to take a different tack.
“It is very obvious when you’ve had sex, Dean,” he said, like he was talking about the weather.  “Elevation in mood, increased winking and eyebrow waggling, excessive cockiness…”
“How is that-”
“Also, the smell.”
“I’m sorry, what?”
“The pheromone smell,” Cass said, nodding his head.  “Very distinct.”
I sniffed the air around me self-consciously.
“There’s also the ritual,” he said, gazing ahead thoughtfully.  “Primping yourself-”
“Hey, now, I do not primp-”
“Fixing your hair, making sure your clothing lies just right…” he explained.  “Then it is off to the bar, a few drinks, a few well-placed aw-shucks country boy smiles-”
“I do not-”
“Find a willing partner and take her to where it is convenient to fornicate-”
“Dude, really?”
“All I am saying is that you stopped having a strong interest in such superficial acts, so I do not know why I should have to be interested in them.”
“I am still very interested in those superficial acts,” I grumbled.  “I just… there was always so much going on, ya know?  And I just… well, okay, maybe I didn’t just want to pick up some random girl at a bar and take her home.  I…” I trailed off, at a loss to explain.
“I understand,” Cass said.  “I wonder if I would be more interested if sex with the person I love was possible, but since it is not, it all seems rather frivolous.”
“You can’t just dismiss it like that when you’ve barely even tried,” I said, shaking my head.  “Look-” I started and froze, the synapses in my brain finally firing.  “Wait, I’m the person you love.”
“Yes,” Cass agreed.
“Wait, wait, wait.”
He waited.
“So… you would want to have sex if it was with… me?” I asked slowly.
“Yes, I think so,” he said, nodding.
“And I’m not… interested… so, you’re just gonna be celibate…?”
“Correct,” he agreed.
“Cass, man, I can’t be the reason for you not getting laid.”
“You’re not,” he said, giving me an amused look.
“You just said…”
“Dean, I have experimented with human sexuality, and I do not find it fulfilling without a ‘connection’,” he said, making air quotes.  “Maybe someday I will make a ‘connection’ with another being who returns my feelings, but for now I am content without sexual contact.”
“But-”
“Perhaps you should worry more about your own sex life than mine,” he said.
I glared at him.
He held his hands up.  “I just mean that if sex makes you happy, then why aren’t you having it?”
“Oh, you watch,” I muttered.
“Are you inviting me for some sort of voyeuristic experience?” he asked, looking perplexed.
“No!” I cried, but then I couldn’t help but laugh.
Cass was quiet, but he had a little smile on his face.
“Is this really enough for you?” I asked softly.
“What?” he asked, eyes flicking to mine as he studied my expression.  “You and I?”
I nodded.
His smile went soft.  “Of course it is, Dean.”
“Okay,” I said, because when he looked at me like that I had to believe him, as improbable as it seemed.  “Cass, I…”
“Yes?”
I struggled for the words and finally gave up.  “You can drop by whenever you like.  You don’t even have to knock.”
“Thank you, Dean,” he said, looking pleased.
“Yeah,” I said with a shrug.  And that was all there was to say.
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yessoupy · 4 years
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okay here is my braindump of my election day experience as an election clerk.
this was my 3rd election to work. the other two i was the presiding judge. this meant that i hired my workers and was responsible for everything and the ultimate judge of the election law for that precinct...... lot of responsibility!!! hated it!!!! so stressful. so when i was hired on friday i asked the presiding judge (pj) if he’d worked an election before and he said he’d worked 6, and that his alternate judge was also experienced, and so i was like yessssssss i’m not even remotely in charge.
so i arrive at about 5:45am, call time at 6am, and just about everyone is already there and kind of...milling about. when the first student clerk arrived she started setting up the ePollbooks (which are a saving grace good GOD) and then the other one showed up and both had worked early voting so they knew what was going on.
anyway, we get going and it’s not an hour in before i’m realizing that the pj and aj are both .... not quite experts. and like ... i really do know more than they do. FUCK i think, grabbing the election manual off the pool table (we were in a tiny little community center) and flipping through to find the answer to the question.
as the day goes on, i get called in to handle ANYTHING that is not an ideal voter or one who just needs to fill out a statement of residency (SOR). curbside voter? skye! oh, the curbside voter requested a mail-in ballot but never got it or -- decides she never even requested it? skye, what do we do? (not only what do we do, but can you handle this difficult person? she’s angry. well no shit she’s angry you’re clueless!!!) an election clerk scanned herself in to vote and then forgot to scan the code into the judge’s booth controller (JBC) so she never got an access code to vote so now it says she voted but she didn’t? skye!! how do we fix this??? (..... “the training i attended on friday said there IS a way but the presiding judge would be trained on it.” and did the pj know what to do? nope. so my response was, “get on the phone on the judge’s hotline.”) more curbside, skye!!! oh wow this guy is wearing a MAGA hat, did no one else notice? (so i nudge my JBC partner to go ask him to take it off bc she’s a nurse and knows how to be firm etc). 
voters coming in not registered and having us go through the scanning and searching for them and they call me over to do my search magic when they can’t find them in the system and i say, “do you happen to remember when you registered to vote?” (because if it was awhile ago and they haven’t voted in a presidential election in awhile -- next questions -- they would have been on suspense for a 4-year period and then dropped off the rolls as inactive which is WHY YOU CHECK TO MAKE SURE YOU’RE STILL REGISTERED) and their answer is, “oh i haven’t registered to vote.” “well okay, i can issue you a provisional ballot but i’ll be honest with you, since you’re not registered to vote it will not be counted.”
the other one that was ‘fun’ (read: kind of heartbreaking) was not being able to find the voter in the ePollbook but calling the registrar and getting their certificate number and STILL note being able to find them and me telling the pj to call the registrar AGAIN and check the “valid as of” date and that call taking forever on hold so I take the pj’s personal cell phone and search the county registration system MYSELF to see that the voter’s registration is valid as of november 15. 
infuriating was being called over to see why the registration wasn’t in the system when the voter had their certificate in their hand and it said “valid as of november 5.” 
so anyway, like every election day i am reminded how stupid people can be (my first curbside blamed democrats for getting rid of straight ticket voting and ... it was definitely the republicans; a voter going through the whole ballot and being pissed off at the end when everything was listed as “not selected” because he hadn’t pressed enter after each selection so i showed him how to do it and he said, “i was doing that!” when he clearly wasn’t) and also how this completely decentralized way of running elections with human beings who are literally temp workers meeting each other for the first time on election day is the BEST security against fraud lmao. so fucking weird.
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puppyluver256 · 5 years
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OKAY SO NOW I HAVE SOME DESIGN CONCEPTS FOR MY SFMxSPLATOON AU HERE YOU GO and now I’m gonna try to run down what this is all about outside of the braindump post that I kept adding onto.
Splat For Me - A Summary
The basic gist is that Habit owns a flower shop in Inkopolis and Kamal is his partner of both the business and romance types. Habit’s a shark, specifically a porbeagle (I’m gonna refer to him as a “Sharkling” due to working on similar logic to Inklings and Octolings), and Kamal’s an octo. The flower shop would have an in-game function kinda like a combination of the Crust Bucket (in that they have floral accessories that players could add to their hat/clothing for exp boosts, cash boosts, and temporary ability add-ons) and Salmon Run (in that you’d get another play mode where you fight weird enemies, more details below).
Sharkling Habit
I had a hard time makin him not look like Garbage so my efforts should be appreciated at some level. I know the only precedent for sharks in the Splatoon universe is Fuka Bottom of the Bottom Feeders (one of the in-universe music groups that AREN’T Squid Sisters or Off the Hook, look ‘em up), but they’ve got that “I’ve turned this shark vertically and am now looking at their mouth and underbelly” look to ‘em that I most definitely did not want, but I managed to make something more in my vision yaaaaay
Habit managed to get away from his nasty abusive parents before becoming a dentist in this AU (besides, being a dentist isn’t THAT lucrative when the dominant species doesn’t even have bones let alone proper teeth), so he’s not Dr. Habit here, he’s just Boris the flower shark. He’s gotten a lot of attention for his little flower shop, partly because the kids participating in turf war are getting some really good use out of the shop’s floral accessories and partly because they like coming around just to see Habit. S’not every day that you get to hang around vertebrates in this society, and they think his teeth are cool. Yup, that’s why I made him a shark, to make the too-many-teeth face not so unnatural. And being a shark, sometimes those extra teeth push themselves forward and knock out the old ones, which if still in decent condition never go to waste. The really nice-looking ones get turned into authentic shark tooth necklaces (after they’ve gone through a good wash, of course, don’t wanna give the customers his mouth germs), the others that don’t have any significant wear and tear get either ground into bone meal for his flowers or occasionally just shoved whole into the soil, with the erythronium responding to these treatments the best.
While there is some flower growth going on in the shop itself, most of the work there is keeping them healthy for sale and the major growth time for the flowers are off-site in various greenhouses that he refers to as Habitats. (before he had these set up, he was caught several times trying to grow flowers in the Kelp Dome and subsequently removed, took five times for him to realize that maybe he shouldn’t be doing that and also maybe don’t try to swipe a nearly-ripe artichoke on your way out gdi) They’re a bit more than just a normal greenhouse, actually; they’re self-contained areas that seem to be made with materials and techniques that are incredibly similar to Octarian technology. How’d he get ahold of that stuff? No one knows, not even Kamal, and he’s the most likely source of such tech who’d be close to him. One thing that is for certain is that he’s procured something that lets non-inking beings use ink-based weapons, and it’s been incredibly helpful given certain recent developments...
Turns out that his Habitats are starting to come under fire from some very tricky troublemakers. Weird little crafts somehow breaking in from the skies, piloted by...snails? Are they really snails? They certainly don’t look like the Super Sea Snails that everyone’s used to, they look more like the typical image of a UFO piloted by snail-like creatures (snailiens?), but they’re here and they’re hungry and they’ve got a taste for flowers. And Habit’s friggin’ pissed. That’s where the player would come in if this were a real game element: once you’d get to a certain freshness level, you’d make your way to the flower shop only to see Kamal manning the counter instead of Habit, and he’d suggest you go help Habit deal with his pest problem because you “look like you’re pretty capable with slingin’ ink”. After a tutorial where you learn how to deal with the big boy snailiens, you could join up with some other players and take ‘em on. You would, of course, be rewarded handsomely for your help.
Funny little image I also had in mind: he’s been known to get stuck in shark form at inopportune moments, and when this happens he’ll need someone to crack his back to make it easier to shift back into humanoid form. No one knows how to handle this unless they’ve done it at least once because no one else around him has booooones XD (also his humanoid form is prolly gonna still have green skin despite no part of the porbeagle being green because I don’t currently feel comfortable assigning natural skintones to any of the SFM characters who are canonically green/blue/purple/etc, unless their canon design makes it Very Obvious what natural skintone would be most likely, ie. Tiff)
Octoling Kamal
Kamal was significantly easier to work with due to my experience with drawing Octolings already hahaha
Kamal’s the assistant manager at Habit’s flower shop, which is basically a fancy way of saying he’s the only other person there who could legally be a full-time employee. He handles most of the logistics of keeping the shop stable, because as much passion the boss has for their work, passion alone can’t pay the bills and he’s often a tad too distracted to deal with the numbers and paperwork. They work pretty well together, even if they do both have a tendency to goof off on the job.
I seriously doubt that Marina and the various incarnations of Agent 8 were the only Octolings to migrate topside after the events of the first game, so Kamal was probably one of several who found a way out. I haven’t hammered this part out yet entirely, but I’m pretty sure that he would’ve been on staff for a weapons/tech r-n-d group before leaving at his first opportunity and grabbing some random gadget in the process. He hated the place he ended up emerging in because it was near a small town where everyone was so spread out and him being used to (not necessarily comfortable with, just used to) constant sounds at all hours made the silence of just the first night unbearable. So he tried to hop a train to any urban area that he came across but in his haste to get topside he forgot to bring any moneeeyyy, not even Octarian money just no money at all, left it all behind like a goof. He ends up freaking out to himself because even though he’s got a valuable Thing on him it’s not like the train people are gonna recognize it as anything but junk or even be able/willing to accept it as replacement for standard currency, then out of nowhere this huge-ass shark man just shows up and buys a ticket to Inkopolis for him? Okay, sure, he’ll take what he can get, even if the guy was all “u owe me a ‘favor’ ;-)” once they were on their way. And of course that’s how he met his future boss and bf. ;P
At some point Kamal gets a little jealous of all the kids having fun with the turf war stuff and kinda wishes he could try it out at least once, but of course that’s kid stuff and he’s got Adult Responsibilities to worry about... Oh wait, there’s actually an adults’ league? And Habit’s insisting on giving him time off to go try it and see how it is? 
(also those flower seed bags say “bloomy” in one of the Inkling alphabets, and yes it WAS a “woomy” joke on my part)
Other details (to be expanded upon)
Putunia and Flower Kid are often seen at the flower shop, even though I don’t have any designs for them yet). Putunia is there so often because she’s Habit and Kamal’s adopted kid, and while she REALLY wants to get into turf war she’s far too young. (if you’ve ever seen the Inkling growth chart, she’s at stage 3 of growth) Flower Kid’s there because they are a part-time employee, often delivering products around town, but they spend enough time with their employers and Putunia that they might as well be their honorary child as well. They’re old enough to participate in turf war, they’re just not interested in doing so.
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examarea-blog1 · 5 years
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hotcerts-blog · 5 years
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tipsycad147 · 5 years
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HOW A LITTLE SELF-CARE CAN GO A LONG WAY
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Why is it so hard to take time for yourself?
My first feeling is guilt. Taking time for myself means someone else needs to be “on the con,” and I feel guilty asking for them to sacrifice their time and energy.
My second fear is time. Is there enough time in my schedule for “me” moments?
Then, I worry - what will I do with my time? What activity will provide the most nourishment for the shortest amount of time and the smallest of amount of money?
And when I finally get some time, I still end up thinking of my children and my partner. How do I escape?
Wait, what? Escape? Is that what I really want?
I crave a space and time where I am the focus of my love and light. Just me! NO ONE ELSE. Peace. Quiet. Sacred alone time.
CREATE A NEW NARRATIVE
Caregivers are biologically and culturally wired to put others first. This is our superpower. We will heal the world (if we don’t burnout beforehand). Taking time for yourself is not just about self-care, it is the key to healthy relationships, happy family, and a vibrant community.
Activate this new narrative: Self-Care is Good for My Marriage, Family, and the World.
This is not selfish work, this is sacred work. When you nourish yourself, and allow your reserves to fill back up, you can be a better caretaker, lover, and activist. Everyone burns out if they don’t balance their lives.
Got it? Ok, good - take care of you so you can be your best self.
AND, let us teach our children the value of self-love. As parents, probably don’t require your kids to love themselves, you do that work. We love them and love them and love them. But, are we helping them love themselves? One radical way we can do this is to model what it looks like. So, take your “me” time! It’s good for everyone, today and in the future. Self-care is a radical act. Do it and change the world, one act of self-love at a time.
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BIGGER IS NOT ALWAYS BETTER
Alright, so you get it: self-love is good for everyone. But how to get it? I used to think self-care happened on a special day where I scheduled hours away from my family. I felt I needed hours to recoup and reconnect with my voice and my power. The problem is - that hardly EVER happened. It was such an adjustment on everyone’s part that I seldom asked for the time. And, it would usually mean taking time away from precious weekend hours spent with my whole family. My grand expectations were difficult to meet. And the worst part - I rarely felt the kind of rejuvenation I was seeking. Call it buyer's remorse, but I never felt like the time off was worth the amount of strength and joy I got in return. I actually made me feel worse, especially if I spent a bunch of money on a spa day.
LITTLE THINGS ADD UP TO DEEP JOY
Showering was the first small act of self-love that I consistently fit into my life (if you are a mama, you know how hard it is to find time to shower when you have small children in the house). I even asked my husband to help me get this habit going.  We even discussed language he could use such as, “would you like to…” or “what can I do so you can...?” Seriously, I needed a lot of help to get this habit started. Now I have added on a 15-30 minute yoga practice after the shower. This is life-changing.
Take it to the next level trace the words “love” and “kindness” and “strong” on the surface of your skin. These healing and loving words will work magic through your whole body.
MORE SIMPLE ACTS OF SELF-LOVE:
Use the fancy stuff: Today is special and you are special! So bring out the fancy shower gel, or use that lovely stationary, or eat on the fine china. Treat yourself.
Take a walk in nature: Connect with the elements, breathe in the fresh air, and observe the plants and animals that we share this planet with.
Make art: Paint, cook with intention,  rearrange the furniture, knit, sew, origami
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MINDFUL MORNINGS
My greatest gift in the pursuit of self-care has been carving out time in the morning. I love sleeping in...as long as possible. But, I learned that the morning is precious. It is an opportunity to touch base with myself before the chaos of the day begins. And, I have trained myself to wake before the children.
HOW TO WAKE UP EARLY?
Go to bed earlier
Say a few affirmations before sleep (say each three time): “I love waking up early” “Waking up early is easy for me” “I wake up to my alarm and eagerly start the day” ”I wake up feel refreshed and enthusiastic”
Have a plan. What is the first think you will do when you wake up? I have a 10 step process that begins with recording my dreams and taking a shower.
Turn off the snooze button. When the alarm goes off - it’s final!
Put your alarm/phone across the room so you have to get out of bed to turn it off.
HOW TO BE MINDFUL?
Start with meditation. Two minutes can be enough to get your practice started, then build yourself up to 10-20 minutes a day. It’s a game changer.
One of my favourite morning practices are “Morning Pages.” Julia Cameron, author of The Artist’s Way, created this idea. She writes, “Morning Pages are three pages of longhand, stream of consciousness writing, done first thing in the morning. They are about anything and everything that crosses your mind… Morning Pages provoke, clarify, comfort, cajole, prioritise and synchronise the day at hand.” I incorporate my daily Tarot readings into my Morning Pages. It is a writing meditation, allowing thoughts to come to the forefront of the mind, and then letting them pass. It is a braindump, a clearing of mental clutter. In this way I make space for peace and heart-centred actions. This is a practice in listening to intuition and connecting with my wisest self.
Most mornings it is still hard to rise from my cosy bed, but I do it. This morning time is divine.
MORE MINDFUL MORNING PRACTICES:
Yoga / Stretching
Divination: Tarot Cards / Oracle Cards / I-Ching
Readings on Spiritual / Personal Development
Nature Journal (document the weather, animal sightings, garden activity)
Daily Finance Check-In
Gratitude / Appreciation Journal
Exercise
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FIND WHAT WORKS FOR YOU
The challenge is finding the activities that fill you up. Everyone is going to be different. I have a friend who needs to be immersed in water; she needs a hot tub or an ocean. An introverted friend of mine is replenished by intimate one-on-one dates with friends. Another friend needs to go out dancing.
Find what brings you joy and make the time, and do it regularly. As it turns into a habit, your family will begin to expect it. It will become strange when you don’t do it. For me, I need regular hangouts with my friends. I need daily journaling. I need to make art. And, actually some of these things I can do with my family. I can sew while the kids are playing, and the feeling I have upon the completion of a project is self-love! Painting with my kids is soul-nourishing. Baking warms my heart. Therefore, I made a list of things that bring ME joy, like baking, painting, and walks, and I fold them into our weekly rhythm. Experiment with different activities. Share your findings! Spread the word on self-love. What works for you?
I’m not saying it’s easy. I am saying it is worth it. YOU are worth it.
https://magicalhomemaking.com/blog/a-little-self-care-goes-a-long-way
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