Sorry for the long rant- but--
I have been. Following you for what now...a few years ?
And while I knew you drew, I didn't... actually see your work.
Now...that I have seen your art..and that I have been reading your comic for a few hours now..I AM SO MAAAD IT'S SO GOOD WHAAAT !?? I NEVER KNEW ??? THE COMPOSITION THE WORK THE WAY YOU SPACE THE SENTENCE THE COLOUR LANGUAGE THE BACKGROUNDS THE CHARACTERS??? COLOUr LANGUAGE ??? EVERYTHING????? IT'S SO- IT'S SO GOOD ??? I- NEW OBSESSION ??? HELLO ??? HELLOOOO ???
I have NOT been this hooked on a comic in so long !!! The whole thing so far is so good and I get to read 200 more pages ???
I would so get a physical copy too omgfgbaaa I love your art so much omg aaaaaaaa it's so beautiful aaaa
Though you should know that.
I'm so super glad you like it! and if you do want a physical copy, great news! you can get the first three volumes of The Property of Hate right here!
We actually really need to shift some products to make room in the warehouse if we're going to be able to HAVE volume 4 of TPoH, so if any of you want to help out by shifting my stock there's never been a better time to buy! We're about to have a sale for TPatJ too, so keep your eyes peeled for posts about when that price drops :D
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contrary to the . . . uh . . . vibes timmers gives off, he actually isn't really all that (。・・。) when it comes to physical intimacy. i mean, it obviously has a bit to do with having to exude confidence and SwagTM while pretending to be jack for so many years, but then when he was trapped in the casino, well . . . ヽ(ヅ)ノ he and the other not crazy folks there had to find some fun somewhere, right—?
basically, he has nothing against "no strings attached" engagements of that ilk; trust me, he needs the stress relief. (and he is in fact more accustomed to flings and "friends with benefits" relationships than real romance, anyway)
where his stuttering and stumbling and fumbling and general cringe rears its head is when he actually has feelings for someone. you know how it is: emotions really do make everything way more complicated. so, like . . . if he's a disaster in the bedroom, it's probably a pretty good sign he has some hidden feelings, js ( ‾́ ◡ ‾́ )
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Me: I'm extremely traumatized to the point of literal CPTSD because I've never been good enough for anyone and the goddamn goalposts keep getting moved but if I give up I'm going to end up with bruises again so all I can do is sob and cry while I'm sprinting to catch up to a standard I'll never meet and goddammit I just want someone to love me and let me be a fucking lunatic about it as long as I'm not like genuinely being a hindrance to the relationship dynamic WHICH I'VE ALSO NEVER EXPERIENCED BECAUSE I'M SO JADED ABOUT THE CONCEPT OF LOVE THAT I REFUSE TO SETTLE FOR SOMEONE I'M ONLY PASSIVELY INTERESTED IN, BUT WHEN SOMEONE CAME ALONG THAT I GENUINELY FELL IN LOVE WITH I THREW MYSELF AT HIM AT FULL FORCE AND NOW HE HAS TO DEAL WITH MY NEUROTICISM BUT HE DOESN'T??? SEE IT AS A PROBLEM??????
Prestor: Hm, that's a lot.
Prestor: This is going to be a very interesting game for us.
Me: What?
Prestor: What?
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you know, bow took that better than I expected.
Anyways.
AOXOODOFOFOFOFO @robyn-goodfellowe YOUVE DONE IT AGAIN THESE NEW CHAPTERS WERE INCREDIBLE HOLY FUCK THE DESCRIPTIONS THAT FUCK ASS TITLE IM GOING TO FIST FIGHT YOU OVER THAT BOW timothy MU MY GIRL MU SHES DOING HER BEST I LOVE HER SO MUCH ALSO THANK YOU FOR THE CALM CHAPTERS I NEEDED THAT YAYAYYSYSYSYS THANK YOY ROBYN
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Hey do you think ya can explain Barnaby and his illusion smoke a bit? It seems really cool and I don't remember if ya talked about it in depth before
sure! this got a bit longer than i expected!
so i was thinking that Barnaby seems like more of a hands-off kinda guy when it comes to altercations. would rather sit back and make funny commentary! so if he Had to get involved, i imagine it would be from a distance and still in an Entertaining Way!
thus - illusion magic! for this au i've been picturing that he got his paws on some illusionary herb in his early teens. for making people laugh, you know! and help out with the farm - illusions could distract animals, convince them to move on to different pastures, calm the chickens for egg-collecting, etc!
Ms. Beagle didn't really approve, since smoking is harmful, but lucky for the both of them this particular plant doesn't deal as much damage when smoked as normal smoking materials would - like tobacco! something to do with the magic properties! so Barnaby mostly used it for chores (when his mama wasn't paying attention, ofc - it's still a bad habit in her eyes) and entertainment purposes.
how it works: on its own, it doesn't do much when burned. it's not like illusions will waft out of the pipe's bowl, or that sniffing it will give someone hallucinations. in order for it to work properly, the user has to inhale properly, form the Intent of what the illusion should be / look like / behave, then purposefully blow the smoke out with that thought firmly in mind. the reach of the smoke depends on the force of Intent, and the intensity depends on the amount inhaled. those that breathe it in / are surrounded by it will see hallucinations of whatever Barnaby - or whoever the user is - wants them to! it can be literally anything! whether or not the target is fooled depends entirely on the individual, but the herb is potent enough that most are convinced that what they "see" is real (auditory hallucinations only occur if the target breathes in the smoke)
upsides: this form of magic is great for distractions, cover, deescalation, and that kind of thing. if needed, Barnaby could stop a fight with one exhale! it's a pretty powerful trick! it also means that Barnaby has built up a tolerance to illusion magic over the years, so where most of the party would be tricked, Barnaby would be unfazed. the only one with total immunity to the form of magic is Wally!
downsides: if Barnaby uses too much in too short of a time, it will get to him. and since he breathes in the largest amount - undiluted at that - it can fuck him up! using it sparingly / using repeated small amounts doesn't do anything. the most it will do is make him feel slightly untethered, but he has an easy time ignoring it / shaking it off.
in mild cases of the magic getting to him, it's like a bad trip. his proprioception is messed with (basically he gets uncharacteristically clumsy & off-balance), he feels like he's falling, anxiety spikes, and his vision is just... off! there are blind spots (im talking actual blind spots, not spots of black), things are moving in ways that they shouldn't, he has mild auditory hallucinations. the others can help ground him by talking to him, touching him, and confirming what's real and what isn't.
in bad cases, it's like that but 10 times worse. on top of all of the previous symptoms being worsened, he gets extremely vivid hallucinations, and they're very often not fun! it's a simultaneous feeling of dying, going insane, and not knowing what the fuck is going on. Barnaby loses sense of where he is, who's where, what's happening. he can get lost in the hallucinations - he has no way to know that they aren't real. in these terrible trips, no one can really help him. they can't get through the hallucinations, and if they do, the magic morphs Barnaby's perception of them and they end up adding to the effects. honestly the best thing for him is to let him rest somewhere with as little sensory input as possible & leave him be until he starts to come down. physical contact does help, since Barnaby understands on an instinctive level that illusions can't touch him, but it doesn't help half as much as it does w/ the mild trips. and again, the presence of someone can make the hallucinations worse.
so! suffice to say! he doesn't like using the herb all that often, and it's why he Stays Out Of It unless absolutely needed. he has two pouches of the herb - one with the strong stuff, reserved for emergencies / one with just a tiny bit of it mixed in with Barnaby's own personal blend for recreational/everyday use. (he also has an emergency tobacco stash in his pack, but that's only for when he's completely out of his usual blend <3)
extra lil scribble that didn't make it into the lil doodle post... i broke his wrist...
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mojo dojo casa house
Howdy folks! Sorry for the delay, I was, uhhhh covering the Tour de France. Anyway, I'm back in Chicago which means this blog has returned to the Chicago suburbs. I'm sure you've all seen Barbie at this point so this 2019 not-so-dream house will come as a pleasant (?) surprise.
Yeah. So this $2.4 million, 7 bed, 8.5+ bath house is over 15,000 square feet and let me be frank: that square footage is not allocated in any kind of efficient or rational manner. It's just kind of there, like a suburban Ramada Inn banquet hall. You think that by reading this you are prepared for this, but no, you are not.
Scale (especially the human one) is unfathomable to the people who built this house. They must have some kind of rare spatial reasoning problem where they perceive themselves to be the size of at least a sedan, maybe a small aircraft. Also as you can see they only know of the existence of a single color.
Ok, but if you were eating a single bowl of cereal alone where would you sit? Personally I am a head of the table type person but I understand that others might be more discreet.
It is undeniable that they put the "great" in great room. You could race bicycles in here. Do roller derby. If you gave this space to three anarchists you would have a functioning bookshop and small press in about a week.
The island bit is so funny. It's literally so far away it's hard to get them in the same image. It is the most functionally useless space ever. You need to walk half a mile to get from the island to the sink or stove.
Of course, every McMansion has a room just for television (if not more than one room) and yet this house fails even to execute that in a way that matters. Honestly impressive.
The rug placement here is physical comedy. Like, they know they messed up.
Bling had a weird second incarnation in the 2010s HomeGoods scene. Few talk about this.
Honestly I think they should have scrapped all of this and built a bowling alley or maybe a hockey rink. Basketball court. A space this grand is wasted on sports of the table variety.
You would also think that seeing the rear exterior of this house would help to rationalize how it's planned but:
Not really.
Anyways, thanks for coming along for another edition of McMansion Hell. I'll be back to regular posting schedule now that the summer is over so keep your eyes peeled for more of the greatest houses to ever exist. Be sure to check the Patreon for today's bonus posts.
Also P.S. - I'm the architecture critic for The Nation now, so check that out, too!
If you like this post and want more like it, support McMansion Hell on Patreon for as little as $1/month for access to great bonus content including a discord server, extra posts, and livestreams.
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