I'm begging you to reread TFOTA and think after every sentence which leaves Cardan's mouth that he CANNOT LIE. And I'm not talking about our basic stuff like "You want to hear me scream." "Yes I do and maybe one day I will.", but more about basic stuff he pops out, like when the folk was eating Snardan he was just like "I always new I taste delicious." Sir, what?

ttpd is all i can think of

Jude: *walks into the room* 

Oak: She's covered in blood again. Why is it she's always covered in blood? 

The Roach: Well, it looks like it’s her own blood this time.

Do you call it The Tortured Poets Department or the Tortured Jurdan Department? I mean, just look at it:

Jude: My Boy Only Breaks His Favorite Toys (so Jude's pov). Down Bad (fuck it if I can't have him???). Florida!!! (Guest in/arrested/shitstorm). Guilty as Sin (they don't know how you've haunted me). Who's Afraid of Little Old Me? (self-explanatory). The Albatross (ha!) I Can Do It With a Broken Heart (again, self-explanatory). The Black Dog (my longing state unspoken)? Fornight (what about your quiet treason?) But Daddy I Love Him (they slammed the door, on my whole world!!!) Clara Bow (the crown is stained...!!!) The Prophecy (oh my god, just shut up). thanK you aIMee (there wouldn't be this if there hadn't been you)

and then there's Cardan, the tortured poet, ofc: Fornight literally starts like it's for him (here's the kinda detail you can expect a separate post from me on). So High School (are you gonna marry, kiss, or kill me?). Who's Afraid of Little Old Me? (the scandal was contained, eh?) The Tortured Poets Department (I mean, he owns the title but also the ring part??) Clara Bow (alright, maybe I'm not saying the song; only lyrics, like: This town is fake but you're the real thing). But Daddy I Love Him (honestly, I didn't think I'd put it here, but hello?? I just learned these people only raise you to cage you? And more there, yeah) Fresh Out The Slammer (SCREAMS HIM! all I wanna say: the letters plzzz)

how it feels when i get really excited to talk ab a special interest and my friend goes "yeah you've said that before"

Fuck all love letters except whatever Cardan Greenbriar had going on when he wrote “my heart is buried with you in the strange soil of the mortal world, as it was drowned with you in the cold waters of the undersea. it was yours before i could admit it, and yours it shall ever remain”

Cardan Greenbriar:

Jude x Carden - The Cruel Prince - Artist: scribbubbles

I'd like to think that Cardan gives thanks to lady luck everyday for his marriage towards Jude

Mr Cardan how did I get so lucky? Greenbriar

I actually adore the thought of Cardan and Jude’s everyday life. Like that “I pretend like I hate you, but you know I love you” type of banter, is EVERYTHING. Like he’s so obsessed with her, and everything she does. Jude could kill someone (she has, multiple) and he’d still adore her. I do like how his first instinct isn’t murder though, when compared to hers. They balance each other so well. I find myself thinking about them often, and that’s when you know it’s a good book. When I went into that first book, I did not expect it to become so beloved among my collection.

"And you think it was sunrise I was waiting for and not my queen."

CARDAN FREAKING GREENBRIAR THE MAN HE IS

Jude: *sitting in court on trial of murder*

Cardan:

Jude: God forbid women do anything like-

there's two ways this could go...

Cardan: I have a question for you

Jude: Yes I’d cry if you died Jude: Yes, I’d still love you if you were a worm Jude: Yes, I still love you Jude: No, I don’t want to break up

Cardan: Thank you

ⓘ This user wants to be someone's sweet villain and darling god, dearest punishment and sweet nemesis, who they think is the only real thing in a land of ghosts, and by who they are forever undone.

the cruel prince in a nutshell

jude: *is insulted* i beg your pardon?

cardan: *smirking* then beg.