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nasa · 3 years

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NASA Spotlight: Astronaut Mike Hopkins

Michael S. Hopkins was selected by NASA as an astronaut in 2009. The Missouri native is currently the Crew-1 mission commander for NASA’s next SpaceX launch to the International Space Station on Nov. 14, 2020. Hopkin’s Crew-1 mission will mark the first-ever crew rotation flight of a U.S. commercial spacecraft with astronauts on board, and it secures the U.S.’s ability to launch humans into space from American soil once again. Previously, Hopkins was member of the Expedition 37/38 crew and has logged 166 days in space. During his stay aboard the station, he conducted two spacewalks totaling 12 hours and 58 minutes to change out a degraded pump module. He holds a Bachelor of Science in Aerospace Engineering from the University of Illinois and a Master of Science in Aerospace Engineering.

He took some time from being a NASA astronaut to answer questions about his life and career! Enjoy:

What do you hope people think about when you launch?

I hope people are thinking about the fact that we’re starting a new era in human spaceflight. We’re re-opening human launch capability to U.S. soil again, but it’s not just that. We’re opening low-Earth orbit and the International Space Station with commercial companies. It’s a lot different than what we’ve done in the past. I hope people realize this isn’t just another launch – this is something a lot bigger. Hopefully it’s setting the stage, one of those first steps to getting us to the Moon and on to Mars.

You served in the U.S. Air Force as a flight test engineer. What does that entail?

First off, just like being an astronaut, it involves a lot of training when you first get started. I went to the U.S. Air Force Test Pilot School and spent a year in training and just learning how to be a flight test engineer. It was one of the most challenging years I’ve ever had, but also one of the more rewarding years. What it means afterwards is, you are basically testing new vehicles or new systems that are going on aircraft. You are testing them before they get handed over to the operational fleet and squadrons. You want to make sure that these capabilities are safe, and that they meet requirements. As a flight test engineer, I would help design the test. I would then get the opportunity to go and fly and execute the test and collect the data, then do the analysis, then write the final reports and give those conclusions on whether this particular vehicle or system was ready to go.

What is one piece of life advice you wish somebody had told you when you were younger?

A common theme for me is to just have patience. Enjoy the ride along the way. I think I tend to be pretty high intensity on things and looking back, I think things happen when they’re supposed to happen, and sometimes that doesn’t necessarily agree with when you think it should happen. So for me, someone saying, “Just be patient Mike, it’s all going to happen when it’s supposed to,” would be really good advice.

Is there a particular science experiment you enjoyed working on the most while aboard the space station?

There’s a lot of experiments I had the opportunity to participate in, but the ones in particular I liked were ones where I got to interact directly with the folks that designed the experiment. One thing I enjoyed was a fluid experiment called Capillary Flow Experiment, or CFE. I got to work directly with the principal investigators on the ground as I executed that experiment. What made it nice was getting to hear their excitement as you were letting them know what was happening in real time and getting to hear their voices as they got excited about the results. It’s just a lot of fun.

Space is a risky business. Why do it?

I think most of us when we think about whatever it is we do, we don’t think of it in those terms. Space is risky, yes, but there’s a lot of other risky jobs out there. Whether it’s in the military, farming, jobs that involve heavy machinery or dangerous equipment… there’s all kinds of jobs that entail risk. Why do it? You do it because it appeals to you. You do it because it’s what gets you excited. It just feels right. We all have to go through a point in our lives where we figure out what we want to do and what we want to be. Sometimes we have to make decisions based on factors that maybe wouldn’t lead you down that choice if you had everything that you wanted, but in this particular case for me, it’s exactly where I want to be. From a risk standpoint, I don’t think of it in those terms.

Can you describe your crew mate Soichi Noguchi in one sentence?

There are many facets to Soichi Noguchi. I’m thinking about the movie Shrek. He has many layers! He’s very talented. He’s very well-thought. He’s very funny. He’s very caring. He’s very sensitive to other people’s needs and desires. He’s a dedicated family man. I could go on and on and on… so maybe like an onion – full of layers!

Star Trek or Star Wars?

I love them both. But can I say Firefly? There’s a TV series out there called Firefly. It lasted one season – kind of a space cowboy-type show. They did have a movie, Serenity, that was made as well. But anyway, I love both Star Wars and Star Trek. We’ve really enjoyed The Mandalorian. I mean who doesn’t love Baby Yoda right? It’s all fun.

How many times did you apply to be an astronaut? Did you learn anything on your last attempt?

I tried four times over the course of 13 years. My first three attempts, I didn’t even have references checked or interviews or anything. Remember what we talked about earlier, about patience? For my fourth attempt, the fact is, it happened when it was supposed to happen. I didn’t realize it at the time. I would have loved to have been picked on my first attempt like anybody would think, but at the same time, because I didn’t get picked right away, my family had some amazing experiences throughout my Air Force career. That includes living in Canada, living overseas in Italy, and having an opportunity to work at the Pentagon. All of those helped shape me and grow my experience in ways that I think helped me be a better astronaut.

Can you share your favorite photo or video that you took in space?

One of my favorite pictures was a picture inside the station at night when all of the lights were out. You can see the glow of all of the little LEDs and computers and things that stay on even when you turn off the overhead lights. You see this glow on station. It’s really one of my favorite times because the picture doesn’t capture it all. I wish you could hear it as well. I like to think of the station in some sense as being alive. It’s at that time of night when everybody else is in their crew quarters in bed and the lights are out that you feel it. You feel the rhythm, you feel the heartbeat of the station, you see it in the glow of those lights – that heartbeat is what’s keeping you alive while you’re up there. That picture goes a small way of trying to capture that, but I think it’s a special time from up there.

What personal items did you decide to pack for launch and why?

My wedding bands. I’m also taking up pilot wings for my son. He wants to be a pilot so if he succeeds with that, I’ll be able to give him his pilot wings. Last time, I took one of the Purple Hearts of a very close friend. He was a Marine in World War II who earned it after his service in the Pacific.

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Thank you for your time, Mike, and good luck on your historic mission! Get to know a bit more about Mike and his Crew-1 crew mates Victor Glover, Soichi Noguchi, and Shannon Walker in the video above.

Watch LIVE launch coverage beginning at 3:30 p.m. EST on Nov. 14 HERE.

Make sure to follow us on Tumblr for your regular dose of space: http://nasa.tumblr.com

#launchamerica #nasa #spacex #crew1 #astronaut #rocket launch #space #science #STEM #Air Force #us military #hope #resilience #Spotlight

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obviouslyelementary · 6 years

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Disney

The Connor siblings belong to @thebunnyartist check them out! they are really cool!

This is just a little fanfic about my headcanon on how the boys would like their Disney movies hahaha. Disney is the best.

--------

Obviously that Hank would show Connor and his brothers the movies from Disney.

Everyone deserved to watch it, everyone should watch it, Disney was great. Specially the classics.

God, he remembered the times when he went to the cinema with his family to watch Tarzan. The little mermaid. Hercules. All classics now.

He was really old.

But in any case, he decided to gather all of them for a family weekend, telling Fowler they would only come back on Monday, and rented a few of his favorite Disney movies so he could watch with the boys.

He bought popcorn, snacks, soda, juice, blue blood and all of those things, all that they needed for a good family time together.

"Okay boys. Here is the deal" he told them as they came back from their respective works that Friday afternoon. "I called your bosses and told them that this weekend, you four are free to spend some time with me"

"Okay" the four of them answered together, each one in their own way, but still, their coordination creeped Hank out sometimes.

"So, I rented some movies I used to watch when I was a kid, like you-"

"We are not-"

"-And we are going to watch them" Hank said, firmly, and the four androids looked at the each other, with Connor and Colton smiling and Conan and Colin shrugging. "I bought snacks, drinks, and rented the movies, because I am nostalgic as fuck and I love animated movies"

"We are not going to watch... Shrek again right?" Connor asked, furrowing his eyebrows a bit out of what Hank could only guess was disgust, making the man raise his hand, pointing to him.

"Don't you dare do that expression when talking about the best movie ever made" he said firmly, and Connor immediately relaxed his facial muscles, looking down ashamed. "That's right. Shrek deserves respect. But no. It's not that. It's the real classics"

"Like Disney?" Colton asked, eyes wide and shining. Hank hummed, smiling at him. He really liked that kid.

"yes. Like Disney. Now go get comfortable, get off those uniforms and join your dad in the living room. We don't have all day long"

"We have an entire weekend" Conan said, and Hank waved him off.

"Go!"

They began with what seemed to be Colton's favorites: the classic princesses. Snow White, Cinderella, The Sleeping Beauty, and then some other classics, like Bambi and Robin Hood.

He seemed to like those the best.

Somehow, Colton knew all the songs (only after a long time Hank realized they could just look up the lyrics in their big brains), and sang them out loud to his heart's content. He even pulled Connor for a dance eventually, singing as they swayed around the living room, almost destroying all furniture and stepping on Sumo.

Eventually, by the fourth movie, Colin poked Hank on the arm and nodded towards Conan, and all of them turned to the youngest android, only to find him deeply asleep.

(he would never admit it later, that the animations Hank was so found of made him go in sleep mode, but Hank couldn't care less. He was adorable when he slept, and that was a rare occurrence)

Then, they kept going. Hank decided to focus the next segment on animal movies, so they watched 101 dalmatians, The Fox and the Hound, Aristocats, Mogli, the Lady and the Tramp. Those movies seemed to call Colin's attention the most, his eyes fixated on every scene, his hand 'accidentally' holding onto hank's blanket when something tense was happening.

But they were all surprised when they heard a sob coming from the quietest android as Colin hid behind his hands when the old woman left the fox in the forest in Fox and the Hound. Honestly, Hank himself didn't remember how upsetting that movie was, but he never knew it would make any of them so upset.

Specially Colin.

"S-she left hi-him!" Colin sobbed as they froze the movie, all androids and Hank looking worriedly at the middle brother. "Wh-why?!"

"She had to. He was an wild animal, she couldn't keep him inside forever" Conan said, as warmly as he could, which wasn't much, and only caused Colin to groan and hit him in the chest.

"Fuck that!" he said loudly, before hitting his own lap and wiping his eyes. "I want him happy!"

"Watch the end of the movie kid" hank chuckled, tilting his head. Colin frowned, eyes still teary.

"Will he be happy?"

"Yes"

Colin huffed and wiped his eyes some more before unfreezing the movie and curling up against himself, hugging his legs like a petulant child.

Gladly, the movie actually ended with the fox being happy with his girlfriend fox, which was a relief because Hank had totally bluffed. God, he needed to watch those movies again.

They moved on to the ones Hank had actually watched in the cinema. Hercules, Little mermaid, Lion King, Tarzan, Beauty and the Beast, Aladdin, Pocahontas.

Those were Connor's favorites. He really liked the ideas behind them, and made constant comments on it. He talked about costumes about the different places that they showed like China and Africa, he talked about the myths about mermaids, and about beasts and monsters and genies.

He was really into the whole fun.

At least, until they watched Tarzan, and his eyes widened at a certain song, something clicking inside his head.

"relate"

Hank furrowed his eyebrows and turned his face towards Connor while the others did the same.

"What?"

"Isn't that the expression? Relate? Relatable?" connor asked, looking back at Hank and making him chuckle.

"you mean you relate to the movie?"

"To the song, Hank" Connor explained, looking back at the TV. "Strangers like me. That was what I felt when I first met Markus. When I first saw all of those deviants."

"Oh. That's sweet" Hank said, smiling fondly, and Connor frowned, looking at him.

"it is intelligent, a really profound song Hank. It is not 'sweet'"

"I think he means you are sweet" Colton suggested, and Connor hummed, smiling a bit.

"Oh thanks" he mumbled, grabbing his pillow and hugging it as he looked back at the television.

But not before he leaned closer to hank and laid his head against his leg, while quietly mouthing the song to himself.

At last, they reached the movies from the 2000s. Since the android creator was born in 2002, he guessed they would know enough about those movies, and gladly, he wouldn't have to show many more from beyond 2020.

They didn’t even have that time anyway. It was already Sunday, after lunch.

He began with the ones he despised the least. Because yes, after he grew up, the movies began to suck. So they watched Atlantis, Brother Bear, The Emperors new Groove, Treasure Planet, Lilo and Stitch, Big Hero Six and some others. They finished it off with Coco, one of Hank's favorites. That movie was really good.

The only one he actually liked from the 2010s.

And, as he was guessing, those should be Conan's favorites. At least, he hadn't shown any particular interest in any of them, so he hoped he would like at least one to do something else other than raise an eyebrow or sleep.

But then again, maybe animations weren’t for him. And if that was the case, Hank needed to find out what was.

In any case, as the new movies played, Conan watched them attentively. Perhaps a bit more than the rest, seeming to really be analyzing them. However, unlike the other three, he remained quiet until the last one finished.

Hank couldn't really stand the silence, turning to Conan and humming.

"So. Conan. Did you like any?"

"yeah, you said nothing throughout the entire weekend" Colton asked, frowning curiously, and both Connor and Colin looked over at him, waiting.

Conan was still staring at the Tv, and his focused glance slowly turned to a frown.

"They were all... bad" he said, coldly, but clearly trying to say it in a way that wouldn’t hurt anyone.

"Conan!" Colton whined. "They are beautiful!"

"I enjoyed them quite a lot" Connor admitted.

"I wish they weren't so sad" Colin mumbled, crossing his arms.

"They are obnoxious, predictable, the voice acting could be better with the lip-syncing, the animations were reused many times throughout many movies, simply overlaid with different characters. The songs were weak, catchy and designed to be sung by children, there were morals to every single one of them and most of them ended up in the same complex. There were barely no morally grey characters, leaving the entire art as something very black and white and boring" Conan said, coldly, clearly irritated, and all others widened their eyes at his complains. "I'm sorry Hank. I did not enjoy it"

"... kid, you are the best" Hank chuckled, and Conan looked at him surprised. "Next time, we will find something you will like. Don't worry" he tapped his shoulder and shook his head, standing up. "Time to sleep boys"

"Already?" Colton complained, and Hank smiled at him.

"you four don't have to sleep" he chuckled, rolling his eyes. "Goodnight"

"Night!"

"Goodnight Hank"

"Sleep well!"

"Until tomorrow"

The silence remained for a while, as Hank changed. But as he laid down on the bed, the discussions began.

"I can't believe you didn't like Mulan"

"She was just crossdressing, Colton"

"Colin, you have no feelings"

"Do you think I should try it one day?"

"try what Connor?"

"crossdressing"

"... yeah!"

"Colton, be silent. Father is sleeping"

"Conan, you know he doesn’t sleep so quick"

"Does not mean you can be loud"

"Can we watch Lion King again?"

"Colin... why do you want to watch that?"

"I... like the songs"

"Fine with me"

"I agree"

"..."

"Conan?"

"... fine"

"Yay!"

Less then five minutes later, Hank could hear the opening song through his wall, and smiled lightly to himself.

He had the best kids.

#siblings au #my fanfic #thebunnyartist #thebunnyartist au #dbh #Detroit become human #hank #connor #conan #colin #colton #connor 60 #rk900 #oc

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marisheeran-imagines · 7 years

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Ed Sheeran Imagine - Guiding Light, Chapter #1

You got home around 7pm, a bit later than the usual due to your boss comanding you to train the new interns. You love working there, it’s always been your dream to work in a book publishing company, but you’re tired, craving for a hot relaxing bath, your mattress and warm blankets. London is getting cold, and you laugh by yourself as you remember the motto “The Winter is coming” from Game of Thrones, the TV show you love watching with your fiancé, Ed, you’d also love having him by your side, cuddling with you, but he’s on tour now, and probably won’t be here that soon. You go upstairs straight to your bedroom, when you hear some noises in the room next door and decide to check it.

You aren’t expecting to find your fiancé there, as he’s been on Tour for his fourth album for nearly a year (practically the time you moved in together), and you barely had time to see each other since then. He’s on his studio room, sitting with his back to you, doing something on his laptop. His ginger hair is longer than you remember, and he’s wearing one of those dark-grey-blue flannels you love on him, making impossible for you to see his tattoos. You heart starts beating fast in you chest, you miss this boy so much the tears quickly fill in your eyes.

“Teddy?” you whisper, astonished, unable to raise your voice, sounding a bit trembling.

“Babe?” he turns towards you, the brightest smile on his face and his eyes, beautifully blue, are looking at you so deep and with such love, the air gets stuck on your throat. Oh God, you’ve missed all of this so bad! Though you’re always watching videos of his performances and interviews (you also chat on skype and facetime from times to times), it’s not the same when he’s live. The tears you’ve been holding back just fall down your cheeks “document.write(Mariana), love, what’s wrong?” he asks worried, standing up immediately and starting to approach you.

“Teddy!” you repeat, this time louder, and run to him, wrapping your arms around his neck tightly.

“Love!” he chuckles, when he realises you’re not crying for being sad, hugging you tight as well “I’ve missed you!”.

“So have I” you murmur against the crook of his neck, breathing in his marvellous scent, and your brain automatically remembers you of it “What are you doing here? I thought you’d be doing gigs for at least a month before coming back home!” you say, raising your head to look into his bright blue eyes.

“Some of the concerts were unfortunatelly cancelled due to lack of security” he sighs. You know how much important this life is for him, which is why you’d never opposed to being away from him for so long. That is his happiness, and if he’s happy, so you are.

“Oh, I’m so sorry babe!” you caress his right cheek, right onto his scar.

“Yeah, well, now I have about two weeks and a half off. I can be with you, at least!” he gives you that smile. The one that makes your legs weaker and your heartbeating speeds up.

“Always the good side!” you smile back at him when he gently wipes off the tears from your face with his thumbs “What do you wanna do for tonight?” you ask, smiling wider when he lowers his hands back to your waist, holding you close to him.

“Hm…” he bites his lower lips and you laugh at his thinking expression “I thought we could stay here, and just chill out. Maybe order something to eat…”.

“Sushi!” you both say at the same time, giggling at each other. This is just one of your many compatibilities. Your tastes, your principles are so alike that it’s what makes your relationship so strong and beautiful, you believe.

“Alright, I’ll just change into something more comfortable and we can order it!” you say, pulling away from his arms slowly, not wanting to be apart from him for any other second. You’re reaching the door when something comes up to your mind and you turn around to face him, walking back to him.

You carefully remove his glasses document.write(glass), placing on the table beside you. You get on your tip toes and wrap your arms around his neck again so you can press your lips onto his. He pulls your body closer to his, hugging you and pushing his tongue into your mouth. It’s a kiss full of love, passion and missing, you can’t help letting a small whimper slip out of you when you taste him after so much time.

His fingertips press the small of your back, bringing you even closer as he moves his tongue slowly inside your mouth, carefully playing with your own. He lowers his hands to your butt, squeezing it a little and breaks the kiss as you need to catch some breath, smooching down to your neck, licking your flesh. Your heart jumps in your chest, your breath speeds up and you raise your hands to his fiery red hair, twisting it with your fingers and he groans into your skin, breathing heavily.

Suddenly you feel a hard form against your belly and you look down, frowning, only then realising that form is actually his manhood sticking you up.

You look back at him and you can’t help blushing deeply at his gaze. “I’m sorry” he says, his voice tone a bit lower and husky than usual, his cheeks also red. He looses the grip on your waist pushing you away slightly so you don’t feel him anymore.

You had already tried to make your mind up before so you can give yourself entirely to him, but your insecurities about your body and lack of experience never let you go any further then some kisses and clothed make out sessions. And as Ed is always controlling himself, extremely respectful of your “condition”, this kind of situation (you being able to feel him through your clothes) is kind of rare, unusual. He tries his best to not make you umconfortable, even if he has to stop himself from getting what he desires.

In addition, you know it’s been hard for him because he hasn’t being with any woman after his last relationship ended. Which happened about two years and a half ago, also the time you met each other and started dating a little while later. “It’s alright…” you say, biting your lower lip and smiling sheepishly “I’m gonna shower” you give him one last peck before heading to your shared bedroom.

Reaching there, you breath in and out slowly, gasping a bit. As you grab fresh and clean clothes and make your way to the bathroom, your mind flies back to the last moments you’ve spent together, and you are able to feel shivers of anxiety running through you. What if you had let him go ahead and make you his? Would he have liked you? Would he rather if…

“Love?” Ed calls you through the bathroom door, interrupting your thoughts. You’re almost fully undressed, except for the panties on your body. You quickly wrap a towel around yourself before opening the door enough so you can see his face “Yes?”.

“Hm… I just wanted to apologise again…” he pauses, sighing heavly, like when he’s disappointed with himself “I didn’t mean to make you feel uncomfortable or like I wanted anything else from you this way, as if I was pressuring you. I promise I’ll control myself better from now on” he says looking straight into your document.write(brown) eyes. His blue ones looking extremely sorry.

“It’s okay, Teddy!” you open the door wider, smiling at him. You know he had no intentions in forcing you to do anything you didn’t feel like, and his cuteness and worry makes your heart melt “I know all of that, you don’t need to explain yourself! Don’t be upset!” you kiss his cheek “And… I kind of…” you take a breath and look at your feet, blushing “I do want this to happen, Ed!” you speak in a lower tone.

Ed brings your chin up, making you look at him “Oh! Really?” he frowns and then softens his expression, giving you an embarassed little smile “You don’t have to worry nor rush about it, baby, when you feel ready, you’ll know, and I’ll know that too”.

“No, baby, the thing is, I am ready, I’m only not sure how to do it” you admit “You know how I just simply freeze every time I am closer to get more intimate with you”.

“There’s no reason to be nervous, love!” he sweetly kisses the top your forehead, wrapping his arms around you firmly “I’m yours!” he murmurs in your skin and lowers his head to look into your eyes. His are glowing beautifully and you can see the love he feels for you right through them. And only then you realise you don’t have to be afraid or insecure, he’s always been there for you, he won’t judge you for your little flaws or the ones you think you have.

“And I’m yours!” you hold the towel against your body tighter with one arm and hugs him with the other. Standing on your toes, you kiss him slowly.

He breaks the kiss and chuckles “Hm… I’m gonna order for us while you take your shower, alright?” you nod “Anything special?”.

“Nope” you giggle “The usual is fine!” you wink and he nods, kissing the tip of your nose and releasing your body “Be quick, baby, I don’t want to be away from you much more!” he says softly, walking out of the room.

You sigh and close the door again, looking at your expression in the mirror: you seem fascinated by your new discharge of confidence. You smile, removing the towel and deciding to shave yourself completely, thinking maybe that’s the night you’ll finally surrender yourself to the love of your life.

…

You put on some of your favourite body lotion, your long sleeved pajamas top and pants. Going downstairs, you see Teddy setting the living room small table to yourselves.

“document.write(Mariana)?” he smiles wide when he notices you “What about document.write(King)?” he picks the DVD of your favorite animation movie and you grin at him. “Perfect!” you nod, approaching him.

“Alright. The food has just arrived” he puts the DVD on and two cushions on the carpet, sitting on one of them and tapping the other beside him.

You take the seat and he gives you the hashi “Thank you, Teddy!” you kiss his left cheek “You’re welcome, love!” he turns his head towards yours, giving a peck on your lips.

Ed brings the table closer to you both, and you start eating the delicious food. You take your time, watching him, so close to you, after almost a year: it’s seem like a dream! He has rolled his shirtsleeves up and you can finally see his tattos. You smile at the little red hand in his arm, it’s one of your favorites, the meaning is so sweet and so Ed that you can’t help melting and falling in love with him more at every second.

You obseve his face, from the left side, his light blue eyes, already focused on the movie, the birthmark highlighting the left one, his nose pointing up, the freckles on it and his cheeks, those cute and squeezable cheeks you love so much, and the light pink lips you wanna kiss all the time. All of it framed by his messy curled ginger hair.

“What?” he looks at you, frowning, when he realises you’ve been gazing at him.

“Nothing” you shake your head, grinning “Just recognising the incredible man I have by my side!” you wink and he blushes deeply and adorably.

“Ah!” he bites his lower lips “Thank you?” he chuckles with himself. “Just the truth!” you shrugh, turning your attention back to the food.

“I must say the same!” he says grinning “I’m the luckiest man in the world for having you!” he hugs you by your side, resting his arm on your shoulder and you lay your head on his, giving a small kiss on his neck and you feel him shiver.

You stay in this position, just watching the movie and enjoying each other’s company for a little while, when you both sit up to eat.

…

After eating and watching document.write(King), you decided to lay on the sofa, Ed behind you with his arms around your body “How’s your job?” he asks, breaking the silence first.

“It’s fine” you answer, a bit tired. Cuddling always makes you feel so comfortable and protected, you know you can spend the whole day in Ed’s arms, just relaxing or sleeping “There are more work to do now that document.write(Luana) reopened the internship program”.

“They should make things easier for the other workers, shouldn’t they?” you can imagine the wrinkle on his forehead as he asks, confused.

“Well, babe, they’re all new on the job, I can’t blame them. They have a lot to learn” you shrug. “I remember when you joined the company, love, we had met each other, what? Three or four weeks before. You had just graduated at the best British University at such a young age; you were a little genious! And still are, to be honest! You had no problems in becoming the best worker there!” he kisses your cheek.

You shake your head, smiling at his words and lean against him better, feeling his soft shape perfectly pressed to your back, looking at him over your shoulder “Hm…” he murmurs in you ear after a while “I still think you should come touring with me!”.

“I can’t sing Teddy, you know that!” you playfully tap his hand that’s holding your waist “What would I do on tour with you?”.

“Well, you can do your job on the road with me!” he says, smiling “Write your own book like you’ve always wanted, instead of translating and publishing someone else’s. You and I know how great your potential is, you don’t even need to think too much to create a beautiful story. And I know you already have a few with you, just waiting to be shown to the world” he smiles wider. You laugh hard at his statement. This boy is so cute you turn around just to squeeze his cheeks with your hands.

He giggles, caressing the side of your right thigh and you shift under his touch, feeling yourself getting anxious with what this nearer contact can lead to, and your heartbeats increase as he grips your flesh firmly. Ed pulls you down his body so he’s on top of you, looking straight into your eyes.

You put your hands around his neck and bring his face down for you to kiss him. You lick his lower lip, asking for permission to enter his mouth and he concedes immediately. A slow battle start between your tongues, as yours tries to explore his mouth and his is doing the same. He grasps your waist, as the kiss become more rougher and passionate, positioning himself in the middle of your thighs and you can now feel his bulge pressed in your core.

You even try to open the first buttons of his shirt, but your shaky hands make things more difficult. Ed chuckles during the kiss, helping you to take his cloth off and you grab his arms, feeling their strong features with your palms. You bite his lower lip gently, pulling it a little.

“document.write(Mariana), babe!” he whispers against your lips, breathing heavily. Ed lowers the kiss from your neck to the skin of your chest that is not covered by your pajama top. You feel this part of your body heavier, along with your breaths; your nipples are also getting harder as Ed’s hands start travelling up the side of your body, stopping right beside your breasts. He separate your lips, and looks down, his gaze stuck at your chest, making you blush.

Putting your hands on his chin, you gently raise his head, being able to see his eyes full of lust and desire. He rubs his crotch against your center slowly and you let out a soft moan, feeling his hard and thick form. You start to get wet down there, throbbing and anxious to be touched “Ed!” you twist your fingers in his hair, pulling his curls a bit.

Ed leans down and gives one last kiss on your jawline before sitting on his knees, panting and looking at you intensely. He runs his hands through his hair nevoursly and lowers them to the hem of your shirt.

You breath in and out a few times before nodding and he slowly removes your pajama t-shirt. You sigh in relief when you notice you had put your bra on, as you don’t wear it for sleep. Ed’s eyes roam over your upper body and you cover youself with your hands, as it gets difficult for you to breath, the same thoughts you had in the bathroom coming back to your mind. Apparently, exposing yourself is being harder than you thought it’d be.

“Love?” he frowns, caressing your hands, right beside the stretch marks on your hips. You were feeling so confident earlier you forgot about these little things that have let you down all these years; the reason why you’ve never been with a man before, with Ed specially. Your gasp, instantly pushing his hands away from your body and sitting up at the other far end of the sofa, with your legs pressed into your chest, looking down at your hands.

“I’m sorry!” you whisper, trembling, some tears threatening to spill over.

“What’s wrong?” he approaches you slightly “Did I push you too much?” he sounds worried and you shake your head.

“It’s not you, Ed…” you bite your lower lip, preventing you from crying.

“Hey, document.write(Mariana), look at me, please!” he caress your chin and when you look at his blue eyes, all you see is disappointment and you feel guilty you’re not strong enough to get over your insecurities and give him what he deserves. But what if he doesn’t deserve you? He surely deserves someone better! Your current thoughts are the last straw and you start crying, hiding your face in your hands “I’m so sorry!” you murmur, your voice sounding muffled.

“No! Don’t apologise, there’s no reason to apologise!” he hugs you, kissing the top of your head and caressing your back, trying to calm you down. You just feel more guilty with the care he stills shows over you and you start sobbing, leaning your head onto your knees. He stays there comforting you until you chill out, and you raise your head, ready to face him “Talk to me, love!” he caress your cheeks, frowning, worried.

“I didn’t mean to…” you shake your head, fighting with the tears once more “I didn’t want to disappoint you, I’m sorry!” you gaze at his eyes, sounding sincere.

“You didn’t disappoint me, babe! document.write(Mariana), believe me when I tell you you could never let me down. It’s alright if you’re not ready. I can wait no matter how long it takes for you to feel comfortable with that” he sweetly kisses your temple. Oh Lord, he doesn’t understand, does he? It’s not a behavioral thing, it’s a physical one.

“You need a woman, Ed. A real one. Someone who can give you what you want, what you need! Not a young little girl, like me, frightened with the idea of being naked for the guy she loves, I’m just not the one” you say quietly, your voice barely audible as you look away at your hands again.

“Stop with that!” his voice is a bit angry “You are everything I need” he cups your face carefully, looking deeply into your eyes “Don’t say that again. EVER!” he stresses, the despair in his voice hurting you more than any nasty thought you had about yourself “What are you so afraid of?” he frowns “It’s just you and me! You said earlier you were mine, do you recall it? I told you I was yours as well. I’m not pressuring you, I’m just trying to understand why you don’t believe me when I tell you you’re the woman of my life!” he bites his lower lip “You said yes, you agreed to be mine forever, remember?”.

Your heart skips a beat when your mind takes you to the moment Ed proposed to you, a year and three months ago, exactly the time he asked you to move in to his house.

…

A year and three months before

“I know I’ll be far away for a while, but we’ll talk to each other every day, I promise!” he pulls you into his arms, kissing your forehead. You’re at his bedroom, helping him package some clothes and objects for his travel.

It’s the first time Ed will begin a tour since you started dating and you’re a bit apprehensive about how your relationship would “survive” through it. You love him with all your being, but you know he’s a handsome famous man and you fear he’d find another girl around the world and kick you out from his life.

“Okay!” you nod, not wanting to show him your insecurities.

“And… he releases your waist, getting down to one knee. You heart starts jumping in your chest when he pulls a small box from his jeans pocket and opens it up to you, revealing a pair of silver rings. Engagement ones, your eyes immediately fill with tears "I love you with all my heart, document.write(Mariana). Only one year of relationship and you already made me feel like I should spend the rest of my days with you, I’ve never felt like that, you make me happy like I’ve never been before. I know we hadn’t talked about our future together as a marriage, but we don’t have to rush anything. Just being engaged, like a promess that well'be each other’s forever” he takes a deep breath "Would you give me the extraordinary honor of letting me be your husband? Would you like to be my wife?" he looks at you anxiously, his eyes brighting, waiting for your answer.

“Yes! Of course, Teddy!” you grin, thrilled, letting the tears fall. That’s all you needed to relax from inside out. Ed loved you more than you thought, after all.

He grins at you as well, his glowing eyes a bit watered and you lower your hands to his face, cupping his adorable cheeks, and wipping off some tears that he let slipped. Ed stands up and takes your hand in his. He puts the beautiful ring in the fourth finger of your left hand and kisses your knuckles. He sniffs and you smile at his sensitivity; Ed’s never afraid of showing his emotions to you, and you try to do the same with him, even being more difficult for you to open up with him about your feelings.

“Would you like to move in as well?” he asks, his voice trembling a little, bringing his hands back to your waist “You may want to stay in my place when you miss me too much”.

“Are you sure? Being engaged is one thing, but living together is another… And as you say, you won’t even be here, Teddy. This is your home” you state.

“This is our home, babe!” he presses the tip of his nose onto yours and you both smile.

“I’ll think about it!” you bite your lip, laying your head on his shoulder, breathing in his cologne, keeping it in your memory, as you know you won’t be able to do this for a while “We just got engaged. Just let it happen!” you kiss his neck and he pulls you in closer, hugging you tight.

“I’m going to miss you!” he whispers “So am I, love!” you speak against his skin.

…

And Ed was right. After about two weeks he left, you missed him so badly you just grabbed the keys he gave you, organised a few boxes with all your stuff and moved into his house. Of course you called him before to be certain his plans were still on. Well, he was so happy he almost flew back home just to make sure you had everything you needed.

“As if it were yesterday” you answer him.

“So you must remember that I love you, right?” you nod, giving him a side smile “Tell me what’s on your mind, preferably without putting yourself down”.

“Ed, I don’t really think you’d want to hear that…” you start. “I want to know, I need to. Tell me your fears, I’m here for you, document.write(Mariana)” he interrupts you, a serious expression on his beautiful face.

“It’s just…” you sigh, avoiding his eyes “You are perfect, you know? And I am not” you shrug.

“document.write(Mariana), I’m not perfect” he says, taking your left hand from your knee and giving it a gentle squeeze “No one is. I’m human, I have flaws and make mistakes. Like everyone else” he caress the back of your skin.

“I don’t mean this kind of imperfection, Ed” you risk a glimpse at him and you see the confusion on his face “I’m younger than you, Teddy. It wouldn’t be a problem, but you have more experience than me in absolutely everything and you have had other women as experienced as you, the complete opposite of me!”.

“Is it being younger a problem for you?” he frowns “You know…”.

“Babe!” you interrupt him, drawing his attention and he stops talking “I kind of haven’t finished speaking my mind yet” you bite your lip nervously. Is he tired of listening to your complains? You knew this was going to happen, and that’s why you never opens up…

“Oh, sorry. I didn’t know. Go ahead!” he blushes slightly, smiling embarrassed, interrupting your thoughts. “It's not exactly about age... I don’t feel… Physically capable of satisfying you” you finally reveal to him, holding your breath, waiting for his reaction. Will he be mad or agree with you?

“What? Why?” you finally look at him and he’s gazing at you, more confused, his very light brows almost meeting each other. “Look at me Ed, I’m not that attractive. Specially comparing myself with your ex-girlfriends”.

“document.write(Mariana), you know I’d never compare you to anyone else, specifically with my ex-girlfriends” he states “And you are attractive. I don’t know how or who made you think like that, but you’re the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen”.

“I think you need to change your glasses then” you say, chuckling, but you frown when he doesn’t show even a fake laugh, his face frozen in a serious look “I meant what I said, baby!” he says, gazing at you as if to prove his words “I am the one who should be asking myself what a young, beautiful lady like you is doing with his old lad here…”.

“No, Teddy! I love you!” you gently place your thumb on his lips, hushing him. “See that, document.write(Mariana)? I love you too. And that’s why I’m with you. I don’t care if you have a third eye or a third boob, I haven’t fallen for you because of your looks, and I bet you haven’t either” he says, with a small smile on his lips.

“It wouldn’t be so hard, you know? Falling for the way you look, Teddy” you play with his fingers that are still involving your hand.

“But have you? Have you fallen for me for the way I look? What was that, then? My scar or my tatoos? My birthmark or my belly?” he jokes, squeezing his soft belly covered by all that coloured tattoos. You grin at him, because the answer is so easy it just slips out of your mouth, without you thinking too much “It was everything” you confess “Not any of these, but all of them together, I’ve fallen for the whole group of things that makes you… Well, you!”.

“See it? And why can’t I love you the same? Why don’t you believe I love all of you? Since your smooth document.write(curly), document.write(yellow) hair, your document.write(hearted) face with your bright document.write(brown) eyes, your little nose, your extremely kissable mouth, this beautiful chest I don’t get to see very often because you rarely wear low-cut clothes. Your breasts I’ve been eager to see for a long time, even if I’m just being able to see their form right now�� he winks and you blush, looking down at your boobs, covered by your document.write(blue) bra.

“This nice document.write(soft) belly of yours, I can tell you it is so much better than mine!” he chuckles and you smile timidly “I don’t care the size of it, nor your breasts or thighs size, I just want you, exactly the way you are, babe! All these perfect little things of you!” he grins at you “And I just love when you wear those pair of tight jeans and I can see your good-looking butt swaying around” your mouth opens in an “O” form, perplexed with his audacity, and he starts laughing at your face. This amazing sound you only have been able to hear by interviews or skype chats. The sound you most love to hear in the world; it is so contagious that you instantly starts laughing too, until your belly hurts and your eyes are filled with happiness tears.

“Oh babe!” you wipe the tears from your face and shakes your head, clarifying your mind “What about these things?” you turn your nose up, grabbing the flesh in your tummy, full of white thin strech marks. You got them when your body started to change from childhood to teenage years, and being young and unconcerned about them at the time, made you an insecure woman now that you actually care about them.

“What are those?” he approaches his hands to yours but you snap them before he can touch you. “No…” you hold his hands far from the marks, afraid of what he would feel if he touched them. “Do they hurt?” he asks worried. “Babe, haven’t you heard about strecth marks before?” you frown “Haven’t any of your ex-girlfriends had them?” your eyes wide when you think about this possibility. Were his exes that perfect?. “I don’t know, I mean, they probably had, but I wasn’t really paying attention to this kind of detail” he shrugs “You’re the first one who is actually caring about showing me them. And I’d probably never notice if you hadn’t shown me as well”.

You shake your head, knowing it’d be impossible for him not to see them “document.write(Mariana), it’s truth! All I think about when I see you this way is how perfect you are, and how lucky I am!” he smiles wide, taking you into his arms, sitting you onto his lap and kissing the top of your head. You feel his hands on your bare waist, near the marks and you tremble a little. He starts to trace the area with the tip of his fingers, certainly feeling the strange texture of your skin “It’s so lovely!” he whispers in your head, kissing it once more.

“Are you serious?” you ask in a low tone. You know he wouldn’t mock you for your features, but you hope he’s not liying just to make you feel better.

“Of course I am!” he raises your chin, so you can look at his eyes “I told you, I love all of you!” he grins and you sigh in relief, yawning afterwards “Let’s go upstairs! You must be tired!” he caresses your back, lifting you up on your feet.

“We won’t do anything tonight?” you ask as he stands up beside you.

“I think we should try it another day!” he wraps your waist with his ams and you pout a little bit frustrated “Oh babe, c'mon” he tickles the sides of your body and you throw your head back, laughing “I want you to be comfortable when we become one, document.write(Mariana)!” he leave wet kisses on your exposed neck, making sure to rub his beard on your skin, tickling it until you’re shaking in his arms. “Ed, babe!” you giggle, trying to push him away.

“Yes?” he stops the tickling session to look at you, wiggling his brows and smirking. You just shake your head, gasping a bit “I’m not tired!” you say, but another yawn coming from your mouth betrays you.

Ed smirks “You’re not tired, huh?” you shake your head “document.write(Mariana) don’t worry, 'cause we’ll have a lot of time to do this, baby. The rest of our lives!” he offers his right hand and you accept it “We can do other things, instead” he grabs your both hands, kissing their knuckles “Dance with me?” he asks, giving you one of his Puss in Boots eyes and you just can’t deny anything he asks; not when he does it looking that cute. You are not a very good dancer and neither is Ed. But it is one of these activities you know you can do together and alone, preferably, because no one will judge or make fun of you both.

You chuckle, nodding and he takes the cushions from the ground back to the sofa, afterwards pushing the table from the center to the corner of the room. Ed then walks to the radio, pressing some buttons to choose a song.

You grin when the first chords of one of your favourite songs, Guiding Light, starts to play. It is your favourite version of the song, only Ed singing (though you love Foy’s version as well) from a gig he played on thousands of years ago (8 to be more exact).

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=6elKkAP33Z0

Ed walks back to you, grabbing your waist and holding you thightly against his body. You feel his bare and coloured soft chest and belly pressed to yours (although your chest is still covered). His hands lower to the small of your back and you raise yours to his nape, playing with the little orange curls there.

“I love you, document.write(Mariana)!” he whispers, caressing your skin, and you shiver with his touch.

“I love you too, Ed!” you close your eyes, resting your head on his chest, being able to feel his steady heartbeats through his skin. Ed starts leading the dance in a slow rhythm, following the song and you move your feet carefully, not wanting to step on his. Your head is close to the lion tattoo, and you lower your right hand, caressing the face of the animal.

He hums the song, his face on your hair, sending vibrations through your whole body. It’s so good being able to hear him so close, in private. You don’t make any sound, not only because you can’t sing, but because you just want to take your time, enjoying the recorded song and the live murmurs Ed’s been letting out.

Ed lifts you up a bit, so your feet are over his, and you chuckle when you realise you were moving too slow, even for the song. He chuckles as well, looking down at you, his blue eyes shinning bright like you’ve never seen before and you sigh, a little smile making its appearance in the corner of your mouth. Even in this position, you’re still shorter than him, but it doesn’t bother any of you, as he lowers his head to give you a gentle kiss, moving his lips on yours with tenderness and love.

You close your eyes, as he does the same, licking your lower lip and you open your mouth, receiving his tongue with satisfaction. He doesn’t stop moving as you kiss, and now you’re in a better rhythm, actually dancing along with the song. You raise your right hand, that was still on his chest, meeting the other, and you caress his nape with the tip of your fingers, noticing him shift under your touch, feeling goosebumps, which makes you smile between the kiss, thinking about the effects you cause on him.

When you need to breath, Ed presses his forehead onto yours, his eyes still closed, a playful smile on his lips and you giggle with the sight of him, seemingly as happy as you are “Thank you, Teddy!” you say, low. He opens his blue eyes and nods, squeezing your waist a bit, and you know he understood what you meant. You’re thankful he’s helping to bring your confidence back, or even build it, carefully, with no pressure.

“Whenever you need, babe!” he sweetly kisses the top of your head “I’ll always be here for you”. And you are sure if it now.

You smile, knowing his words are true, letting all your fears disappear as you dance around the center of the room, as the song starts reaching its highest point with Ed beating the guitar and asking for the crowd to sing along. The lyric makes its way from your brain to your own heart. It’s perfectly matching your situation. He’s so much more than your fiancé, he’s your half, your anchor¹. He’s literally the light who’s always showing you the way back home, back to yourself.

You keep dancing until the last second, looking into each other’s eyes, feeling the song deepen in your hearts, and you know you’ll be his as forever as he’ll be yours!

¹This anchor thing is something I got from Teen Wolf {the TV show}, I hope you all had understood what I meant by that :o) (Though in the series, we learn that we must be our own anchor, in this situation, Ed being her anchor doesn’t mean the reader is not capable of taking care of herself, he’s there to support her like he’s stressed all the time! I’d have written “half anchor” there, but that wasn’t the moment, the reader was enjoying her dance and finally believing she was enough for our Ed and I didn’t want that scene to be too much heavy/serious. It’s just a couple enjoying each other after so long apart; as the reader “discovering herself as a beautiful and worthy person) Be your own anchor, people!

Sorry for the long note again!!

A/N: Hey people, good morning(?) (it’s almost 1 and a half am in Brazil)! Let me know what you are your thoughts about this first chapter. Should I write the second one? I’m so anxious to know your opinion 'cause it was really special, for me, to write about our Teddy! And I’m a little unsure if I’ve done it correctly. I wanted to "make” him kind of mixed by two things: °the way I think/imagine he’s most of the time; °and the way he shows himself to everyone (by what I have seen during interviews and gigs, by his lyrics and etc)

Also, the story/series name is Guiding Light just because I was watching Ed’s gig in the Roundhouse (2014) and I reminded myself how much I f* love this song, then I had the idea of the dancing scene, and I needed a song played/or not by Ed, that didn’t have a direct connection with his ex-girlfriends, but at the same time, could be a parallel to Perfect (which is part of the chapter name anyways :).

So… this song just perfectly matched what I was looking for, and I hope it makes sense to you! (I’m terrible in making up titles and all). I think I explained a lot of what’s on my mind in these notes, I’m very sorry if it was boring for you. If you think this is unnecessary, please, let me know, and I will reduce them! But I think it is important to stress some things when we write.

I also need to know if you think I should keep the Some Considerations section in every chapter or only in the first one! About the next chapter: It took about 5 days for me to write the story completely, + 1 (today) to add some details and other stuff, so, it’s probably the time I’ll take to write the next one, as well. But, I won’t be home from this Friday to Sunday, so, if I count six days from the days I’ll be available to write, I’ll probably post the next chapter on the next week, Friday, September 6th! (it can be before or after it).

Leave me your questions, comments and anything else you want in my inbox! Follow me, as well, if you want! My twitter account, if you want to follow me there too: @maripattinson_ (it’s in Portuguese, but everything related to imagines is posted in English!).

Sorry for any misspelled words, I’ve done my best to correct everything I could find during my readings!

Thank you for your support!

#ed sheeran #teddy sheeran #teddysphotos #ed sheeran imagine #ed sheeran x reader #imagine #reader insert #ginger #ginger hair #ginger ed #sheerio #sheerios #edward christopher sheeran #ed sheeran fandom #ed sheeran fanfic #ed sheeran gif #teddy sheeran fanfic

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