natsuyuu movie.....................................

cries in love,

fuck it's been SO long since i last watched a natsuyuu & i miss it SO much fuck i love this show im gonna pass out

sees my SON on the screen being kind to youkai agkajgsdgk djfkd natsume "im not worried ABOUT sensei im just making sure he isnt getting into trouble anyway time to scour the woods" like gjksJGSDHSDJG i fucking cry when hthey w gjj WORRIEd about each other,,,,,,,,,,,,, there were scraps in this episode & i gobbled them the FUCK up oh my fuckin god,

like first we have natsume worried that sensei hasn't come home in a few days so he goes out lookin for him, THEN later in the ep natsume gets attacked by a youkai that threatens to eat him, he hears sensei a little ways off and calls for help- before help can arrive he falls into a hole & knocks out for a bit but at the END of the episode it's implied that sensei ate the fuckin youkai that threatened natsume and i just!!!!!! coulda been like welp crisis averted no harm no foul but NOPE this bitch tried to eat my SON i mean my WIMPY LOSER HUMAN bottoms FUCKING UP godD

& then that fucking oh my god. when natsume & the ishiokoshi are walkin thru that underground tunnel & natsumes like "ahh it's so pretty.... if only sensei were here to see it too" LIKE ok bitch u wanna share these special moments w sensei ok i se i see AND THEN as if THAT weren't enough already the fucking gut punch at the end when natsume says to sensei "actually let's take the underground tunnel back, i think you'll like it" I FUCKIGN literally i was holding it together just fine for the majority of the ep bUT WHEN HE SAID THAT I LOST COMPOSURE LGKJDKFJSKDGKD "shut the fuck upppPPPPPPPPP AAAAAAAA" <--- me irl when natsume said that

it just fuckin destroys me HE WANTED TO SHOW THE PRETTY SCENERY TO SENSEI......... FUCK im not okay

so ep 1 was great

and ok ep 1 was a natsume/youkai episode, i love those, v natsume centric which is always a plus, but then ep 2 slid right in to remind me that YO THIS THING HAS OTHER CHARACTERS who i love and adore NISHIMURA & KITAMOTO WERE IN IT 💖💕❤️💕💕❤️💖💖❤️

and it was a tanuma centric episode!!!! with youkai!!! seriously good shit hello fucking HELLO tanuma's insecurity & quiet jealousy over natsume's spiritual abilities fuckin GET ME BRO 👌👌😩💯 boy just wants to feel special & important & useful like his very special & important friend natsume & just god. the fact that this was potentially a dangerous situation for him but he STILL went ahead with it because he wanted to be included for once and like, feeling like the world of youkai was interested in /him/ specifically and the subsequent disappointment when it was never really about him just ahhhhhhhh tanuma please i cant take it u are SO special & important i PROMISE

also natsume worrying over tanuma the whole time aaaahhhhh he's so protective over his friends fucking kill me LIKE literally just. that moment when he asks misuzu straight up if he's a youkai in front of tanuma & misuzu's like hehe yea & natsume is just like no bullshit straight to the point if u hurt tanuma in any way shape or form we are gonna have HANDS between us like. idk there's something about the fact that natsume is SO well versed in how to talk to & deal with youkai at this point, there's this wild juxtaposition between how polite & respectful tanuma treats misuzu and how firm and intimidating natsume has to be that is just.,,. kisses fingers so good

like it's another way to contrast the two of their worlds, how removed tanuma is from youkai vs how familiar and versed natsume is with them, but it's also just like. idk i like those kinds of situations where one person is like Talking Business while their friend or whoever is watching like Woah Damn u know?? like there was a similar thing ascendance of a bookworm in the s1 special, where myne's family sees her negotiating business with benio & theyre like holy shit this is intense i never knew myne could talk like this- it’s like that sorta thing

like obvs it's not the first time tanuma has seen natsume interact with youkai but like, tanuma had been pretty convinced misuzu was just a normal human so i feel like it's even more striking to see natsume, who is always so polite and reserved around people, to suddenly come on so strongly against misuzu.... i just really like looking at the interaction from tanuma's point of view and feeling like u know, tanuma got to see a side of natsume he wasn't expecting. like he's learning a little more about him, getting closer in a way. idk it's just really appealing to me

also one last thing, there’s that small moment when tanuma's saying he wants to continue talking with misuzu and natsume starts to argue against it but stops because he realizes that how he (natsume) is feeling must be exactly how natori feels whenever natsume wants to rush into dangerous situations, like. just taking that step back & relenting with the resolve to protect tanuma, that was a really good moment!! obviously his concerns were more than valid but taking a second to realize that on some level he's felt the exact same way as tanuma does now on many occasions and relenting, deliberately trying to not control him, it all just felt really good to see, like it was a small bit of character development right there. Love that shit

(sidenote i really love misuzu's human design tbh like JUST the right amt of unassuming vs "something feels off"ness, plus appealing design w the purple hair like hello. i like the it)

so anyway!! i hesitate to call it a movie but u know. good movie!!! i really enjoyed these two eps and i loved seeing my fucking BOY again, these two eps were just the right mix of everything i love about this show to remind me that HEY it's still my god damn favorite anime!!! and i gotta get back into it!! i gotta read the fuckin manga man oh my godddd. lies on the floor i love natsuyuu so much

My Game of Thrones S8 Rant.

At this point we have two episodes left in the entire Series of Game of Thrones and to be completely honest it's been underwhelming, disappointing, and rushed, which now that the honeymoon period of having my almost 2 year wait end i can clearly see.

The writing is the main issue I have with all of this. It all comes back to the writing. Too many times gor too many occasions have I asked "why?" It just feel like too many things don't make sense and too many things were done to be overtly dramatic and shocking, instead of leaning on the STORY and NARRATIVES which we as a fandom has been salivating over for the entire series.

Let's start with "The North" and their whole Saga and the Dilemma with The Night King, White Walkers, and AotD. An evil that was shown do us from the very first episode, very first scene if i am not mistaken. An ancient and evil magic, that the living will have to deal with, that the living will have to overcome or become just more members if the AotD. THAT was the driving force of S7 basically. The reason Jon and Dany meet? Dragonglass mountain under Dragonstone. Dragonglass? Oh, just ine of the 3 ways you can kill members of the AotD. The reason every main charachter besides a certain red head *Insert word here cause I'm trying my bet to not name call* showed up for a summit in the Dragonpit IN KING'S LANDING OF ALL PLACES? Oh, just to show Cersei a wight in an attempt to convince her to help fight which was an idiotic plan in it's own right. Bottomline is the Night King and his Army was a driving force and tbh i appreciate focussing one half if the last season on him and the other on Cersei. Issue is Cersei conventionally should have been hit with a "Fire Style Fireball Jutsu"

Off rip cause that was the easiest and SMARTEST MOVE. But i digress this is avout S8. So i have no conv eptyal plab with the amount of time in episodes gi en hi the threat north but the dialogue and context are what begin my frustrations.

Everything feels rushed immediately, as evidenced by Bran

Dropping the bomb of the wall falling and Viscerion being controlled by the NK. Now the pace quickens and thats cool but it gets jumbled and stats jumbled. Which makes the North and their resistance to Jon bending the knee so weird....or weirder than it already is. Yes you want independence. Yes you want to be held out of wars. Yes want to be isolated but.......THE WHITE WALKERS ARE COMING FOR YOU FIRST AND JON WAS YOUR KING. HE LEFT WITH NOTHING BUT DA(D)VOS AND A FEW GOOD MEN AND RETURNED WITH TWO ARMIES, TWO DRAGONS, AND WARS SUPPLY OF DRAGON GLASS AND A GODSDAMN QUEEN.....Why in gods name are any of them so cold and hesitant to people helping thwm when they didn't have to? Or at the very least why thorough the very end of that war does it last?

Which brings me to a certain Red head. Sansa Stark has cause way more friction and problems than necessary this season amd it's so ridiculous and petty and stupid that legitimately gwt upset thinking about it. Upset about Jon not telling you he was going to bend the knee? Fair point. Ask him why and how he bent the knee maybe hmm? Want to stand your ground and show Dany you are a Wolf of Winterfell amd wont be taken down without a fight? I respect the chutzpah but Dany is here to save the North and literally gave you the warmest of hellos along with layer on telling you tje obvious that she loves your brother after you state the obvious that he loves her too. Maybe sit down and discuss the fate Winterfell and the North after the war is won before the war begins hmm? Mad Two armies, Two Dragons, and A Queens entourage now must be housed? THEN DIE ON YOUR GODSDAMN OWN AND JOIN THE ARMY OF THE GODSDAMN DEAD......Sansa and her pettiness and nothing. NOTHING...of use to the season until she breaks a swear to her own brother. Now we all know biologically they are cousins but They grew up Brother and Sister tho not the beat relationship. She swore to him i front of Their other Brother and Sister in the Godswood no less that she wouldn't tell a soul.......and then goes and Tells Tyrion. Why? Please. Anyone. Anyone please tell me why. I have zero clue. Break an oath to the man who was a brother to you? Why? You don't want Daenerys, the woman who saved your entire country from Death's icy grip, as tge Seven Kingdom's queen? Why? None of it makes sense. None. And for those who dare say she's "Playing the Game" No she isn't Triple H amd no it's not time to play the game it's time to think rationally.

Next up is the choices made by the writers that just rubbed me the wrong way and shot down my faith in the show. First and foremost Sam and the Tarly reveal. Absolute ridiculousness. Randyll Tarly, Sam's father, basically said to Sam: You aren't what a real man is, you aren't what a Lord should be, you are garbage. Go to the Wall or I'll take you out back and end you myself.

Now, person who may or may not read this, I don't know about you but i would tap dance on the grave of my father if he said and did to me what Randyll did to Sam. Period. End of discussion. On to Dickon *Insert snicker here* Tarly. I would have less hate for him but still no love. Dickon was now heir. Dickon was now going to get all the land and wealth and possesions and titles that nelonged to Sam simply do to patriarchy and age. (which is another discussion but we all know is how GOT is governed) So I have no clue why sam is boo hooing about either of the two. Now here's the kicker. Randyll Tarly....along with Dickon Tarly...COMMITED TREASON. TREASON AGAINST THE HOUSE THEY WERE SWORN TO FOR GENERATIONS. They also HAD. A. CHOICE. Death or Bend the knee. They chose death. End of story. Sam being a little shook? Understandable. Full fledged sobs? Stop watching Lifetime movies D & D.

That leads to Sam telling Jon, R+L=J with spite and anger which in all honesty is bullshit and Sam is a bullshit friend for it. You can't tell your supposed best friend his life was a lie n an attempt to get back at someone who honestly did you no wrong. Just bad decisions all around and feels lazy on top of it all.

Then comes the shock and awe that really just.....*Deep sigh* takes away from it all. No issue with Arya saving us. Being the hero that kills the NK. Being the Princess who was promised. But wait.......It was shock value? This was a decision made 7 years into this show? Not off rip? Jon and the NK stare downs were.....just stare downs? While all along we learn nada of the NK? Shock value is a no go most times and this is why. No substance. No merrit. Ep 4 references Arya as the hero....maybe 3 times in small passing. It just felt l like it didn't matter. More shock that was there dor shocks sake was Rhaegal dying. How did Dany not see them? Why did Dany not see them? HOW WAS I THE ONLY ONE PRESENT THINKING TO MYSELF THEY'LL BE AMBUSHED? Tyrion too drunk? Jon to tired with having to Defend Dany against Sansa because Sansa on that bullshit? Varys all of a sudden cant get information? Like how was THAT not foreseen and how wans every boltshot at Rhaegal a guranteed hit? The most shock value of all was Missandei, former slave and a POC being re chained and then killed in a foreign land by a foreign person(who's Caucasian as you guessed) for nothing. It was a heart stabber indeed and makes you want to see Dany destroy Cersei and Grewworm sestroy the Mountain but unnecessary.

All in all I'm real hurt. Real hurt. Totally prepared to wipe S8 from my mind and have GOT with S7. If you read any of this, welcome to my ted talk, sorry for rambling haha.

Rate these Bonnie ships: Bonlaric (circa s1-3), Shennett, Bonnie x Mason, Bonnie x Silas, Bonbekah, Bonnie x Dan Humphrey, Bonnie x Pyro (X-men movie verse), Bonnie x Rogue (X-Men animated series), Bonnie x Fox Crane (Passions), Bonnie x Claire Bennett (Heroes), Bonnie x Peter Petrelli (Heroes), Bonnie x Hardison (Leverage), Bonnie x Tristan (Gilmore Girls). Alright I'll stop there.

bonlaric (s1-3): hmmmm. in the hands of a good writer, i wouldn’t say no. @irresistible-revolution posed a tantalizing scenario where sheriff!alaric has a back and forth with bonnie in this excellent fic. it really depends on the context. i mean there’s a deleted scene in S7 where alaric brings her food and asks her if she’s eaten all day and it’s…something, but i wouldn’t trust tvd writers with this ever. i remember we were terrified of bonlaric actually happening in S7 because it would’ve been a disaster. they haven’t had a good grip on alaric in ages and matt davis is not a good guy, sigh . so i guess s1-3 alaric would be preferable. i’d go for S3 when she’s already 18 and they have this emotional fling where he feels guilty because he’s technically her teacher but it happens anyway *looki eyes*. i mean, i know he was under esther’s thrall anyway and he drank from bonnie so the seeds are there. also he was klaus for a hot minute so it counts? 2/5

shennett - i hated how they handled this. yet another dude who *seems* to have bonnie’s interests at heart only to turn around and hurt and sabotage her. and it always plays off a bit romantic, doesn’t it? ugh no. 1/5

bonnie x mason - ooohhh, tyler’s uncle. hmmm. again, i wouldn’t say no. it would definitely be hot. and everyone would be *shook* when they found out. 3/5

bonnie x silas - almost identical with shennett. you got tentative whiffs of something interesting, right until silas turned out to be stefan 2.0. that’s their ammo. flirt with the idea that bonnie could matter to a white bad boy and then quickly snatch it away before it becomes an actual thing and steals the white girls’ spotlight.  1/5 

bonbekah - excellent AU fodder. some very talented ppl have written great fic. there’s a lot of potential. 4/5

bonnie x dan humphrey - haha, omg. never have i considered this. buuut dan could be that loving, attentive boyfriend who maybe lets bonnie catch a break and they could watch movies together and geek around and just be young. but also they could have Real ™ conversations about important emotional stuff cuz hoo boy, does bonnie need it. oh and she’d make fun of his novel, and he’d tease her about her magical abilities. i’m sure he’d make quips about helping him persuade his publishers using her ‘witchy skills’. 3/5

bonnie x pyro (x-men movies) - omg, this would be like bonkai 2.0. yaaas. i’d be down. also i had a major crush on this dude in the x-men movies. bring it. 5/5

bonnie x rogue (x-men animated series) - ooh, witch meets witch, sort of. bonnie would help her cope with her abilities, rogue would try to get her to have fun more often and let loose. i can see it.  3/5

bonnie x fox crane (passions) - lol i had to look this guy up. i can’t believe he’s also kevin on ‘this is us’. umm, i really can’t pronounce myself here, i have not seen this soap. i gather he’s some kind of rake/bad boy which is cool in my book, i just don’t know enough so ???

bonnie x claire bennett (heroes) - ohh, i loved claire. i think she might’ve been my favorite. and i love that they share a family name. this could’ve been a great enemies to lovers, cuz bonnie would at first think claire’s a vapid mean cheerleader  and then they’d have to work together and realize they’re more similar than they thought. i’d be down. 3/5

bonnie x peter (heroes) - ohhh, bonnie and milo ventimiglia *looki eyes*. he’d have to “save the witch” instead of ‘save the cheerleader’. omg, someone write me this. 4/5

bonnie x hardison (leverage) - again i’m ??? i have not seen this show and know nothing about this character but maybe smb else would like to pitch in? 

bonnie x tristan (gilmore girls) - noooooooooo why did you put this in my head??? GAAAAH. now it’s everything i waaaant. bonnie enrolling into chilton and having tristan follow her around and tease her. meanwhile they share these intense fraught Looks ™. also tristan is basically young klaus, i mean daddy issues much? haha.  5/5