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#god elias is so sexy
kristsune · 9 months
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Also in today's tma relisten
Pipe murder time
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archivist-13 · 16 days
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you ever want to punch someone through a podcast
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svampira · 3 months
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taniushka12 · 9 months
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im a simple guy i think about my otp giddily thinking abt ruining the person they hate's life and also maybe killing em and i heehehohohheoheueohhhgkhdkfghgfhsdf
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letsgetrowdy43 · 5 months
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Jingle Bells—
Request: "i said UGLY Christmas sweaters not nsfw Christmas sweaters, we can NOT wear these, my boss will kill me" with the littlest hughes au?
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Baby, it's cold outside Celly!!
Au Masterlist!!
Horror took over Honey’s face as Quinn stepped down the stairs in his new ugly Christmas sweater, which she believed he had picked out just for her work Christmas party.
Her jaw dropped as she watched the grin on his face grow as her face grew red, brows furrowed as she reached out to grab hold of him to better read the words displayed on the jumper. “Please tell me this is a joke,” she cringed as she re-read the words ‘jiggle my balls,’ written across his chest with a sexy Mrs. Claus holding a set of jingle bells.
“You don’t like it?” He feigned innocence as he reached out to touch her but was met with a smack to his hand as she denied his touch. “Like? Q, I hate,” her face grew embarrassed as she searched his expression for any sign that this could be a joke, but she was met with nothing but a grin, "this is icky, Babe."
Quinn was smiling at the concern on her face, brushing the hair out of her eyes to get a better view of her reaction, "Quinn you realize it's talking about your balls right?" "Yes love," he said, watching as her face continued to grow redder.
Little did she know that this was just some gag gift that Elias had gotten her during their ugly gift exchange, “please tell me you’re joking,” she hid her face in her hands, shaking her as his grin grew. "What are you doing?" he asked, his hands moving to pry hers away from her eyes but she backed away from him and shook her head. “If I close my eyes and pray maybe it will go away,” she mumbled and backed away from him even more to try and keep her cool, “Quinn you really can't be serious”
“Hun, you said ugly sweater, I’m just playing the part,” He reasoned as her eyes narrowed, glaring at him and his stupidity, "this is as Ugly as it gets," his voice filled with laughter as she dropped her hands to glare at him. “Quinn you’re sweater is talking about your balls,” her voice started calm but quickly turned a little annoyed as she massaged her temples, “I said ugly Christmas sweaters, not NSFW Christmas sweaters.” “It's funny!” “You can not wear that Quinn, my boss will kill me” she attempted to return to her calm state, “she wants perfection, and this is not it.”
Quinn let out a laugh as he pulled his wife into his chest, his eyes flickered over to the clock on the wall, ten more minutes until they needed to get out the door if they wanted to be there on time.
“We have to leave soon,” he mumbled as she tensed in his arms, “I gotta go change,” she pulled away with furrowed brows. “It was a joke?” he nodded and watched as her face melted into a look of relief, “Oh thank god,” she took a deep breath as she kissed her husband lovingly on the cheek.
"That was so not funny, I thought I was gonna have to go alone," she smacked him on the chest. "You really thought I would leave the house in that?" "I don't know?" Quinn shook his head, his face was still full of amusement as he kissed her lovingly on the lips, "I would never do that to you hun, blame Elias for me owning this though, completely his fault,” he placed another kiss to her cheek followed by a quick sorry for the stress before running up the stairs to change into his sweater.
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I don't really like this... but I needed to write something or I would've gone insane from boredom
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sarcastic-positivity · 6 months
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     It was the middle of July and despite Tim’s aspirations as a kid, he did not, in fact, have a job that gave him summers off. As such, it was a miserable affair, getting to and from work. Usually Tim would be in an airy t-shirt and shorts but Jon had caught sight of his Hawaiian themed top last week and it had been a close thing to avoid being forced to go home and change. It would be a few weeks before he could get away with such a ‘blatant display of disrespect for work procedures’, as Jon put it, so here he was: sweating his ass off on the tube and praying to whatever god would listen that they’d fixed the AC at the Institute.
     God never did like Tim.
     “Christ above, does Elias want us dead or something?” Tim cried to the room at large as he dropped heavily onto his spinny chair. It was stifling. “What did we ever do to him, huh?? Did someone submit a statement about Bigfoot again?” He immediately started popping buttons on his ‘work appropriate’ shirt.
     Sasha popped her head up from her cubicle and grinned at him. Her waist-length braids had been piled sloppily on top of her head and she looked about ready to topple over from the imbalance. She’d already shed her top layer down to a simple purple tank top but she still had a sheen of sweat on her brow that had her large round glasses slipping down her nose.
     “Pretty sure it’s cause Gerry called him an old codger and compared him to the statement giver from the McGregor case last week. He’s out for revenge now.”
     Tim wrinkled his nose. “What, the stuffy one with the cane who wouldn’t shut up about how the Tories are implementing a surveillance state?”
     “The very same,” Sash confirmed, pushing her glasses back up with a hand. “Though I personally think Elias would be very pro Big Brother. Did I tell you he asked after my aunt the other week?”
     “You told Elias about Matilda’s lung cancer?”
     “That’s just it! The only person I told about that was you, and I’m pretty sure you didn’t run off to tattle to Elias.” She leaned forward in her chair conspiratorial and Tim couldn’t help but do the same. Sash was magnetic when she was like this. It had led to more than one rendezvous in their first year at the Institute. “I think he has cameras down here.”
     It wasn’t the most insane theory she’d come up with, somehow. Just two months ago she’d followed Jon home because she didn’t believe he actually had a home; she’d thought he’d been sleeping in the Institute of all places. Besides, there was that feeling of being watched that pervaded this place. Still, Tim couldn’t help but laugh.
     “I think we’d know if he had cameras, Sash. Did I tell you what he-”
     “What fresh hell is this?” The voice from the doorway was flat and scathing and Tim immediately spun in his chair to grin at the intruder.
     “Gerry!” He called happily. “I didn’t know you were coming in today!” He was wearing his signature black trenchcoat and a scowl that did things to Tim. Luckily for both of them, Tim was well guarded against Gerry’s scary-sexy goth vibe by virtue of sharing a flat with him. There were only so many times you could get a chub from simply looking at your roommate before your prick just gave up on the enterprise entirely.
     “There’s a statement I need but this is fucking ridiculous.” His voice was as deep and rough as it always was but the angry edge to it managed to send a little zing down Tim’s spine. The days that Gerry showed up at work are always so interesting. “It’s at least 10 degrees hotter in here than it is outside. The fuck is Elias thinking?”
     “Gonna rough him up for us, Ger?” Tim asked with a grin and Sasha laughed. “Stomp on him a little with those boots of yours? 10 quid says he’s into it.” Gerard shot him a look but there was a smile playing around his lips, pulling slightly at the snakebite piercings there. His makeup that day was the same as it usually was, eyeliner and three exaggerated lower lashes that made his gaze all the more intense. Thank god for the aforementioned Roommate Protection. Especially when Gerry’s eyes swept over Tim before meeting his eyes again and giving a mocking little smile. His eyes were slate grey and impossible to look away from.
     “Projecting much, Stoker?” He asked in a low tone. It was teasing and Sasha cackled but Tim’s brain stuttered and properly died. What did one say when a hot goth implied that you maybe wanted him to stomp on you with his giant sexy boots? Especially when it was true.
     “What, you wanna find out, Keay?” Tim shot back. That was good. Keep it light, let it plausibly pass for playful workplace banter – a little bit of light flirting to keep thoughts of the heat at bay. Gerry arched a brow at him, face betraying nothing but that same cool amusement. Sasha snorted and shook her head, turning back to her computer.
     “You two are ridiculous,” she told them. Tim shrugged, eyes still on Gerry, and then Jon’s office door creaked open.
     “Oh good, you’re here, Gerard.” Gerry’s eyes flicked away. “You said you needed the Anderson file?” 
     “Yeah, that’s the one,” Gerry said. He passed by Tim’s desk to take the file from Jon. Tim turned back to his desk. “By the way, your workplace is a HSE violation waiting to happen.”
     “Yes, I am quite aware,” Jon said drily. “Make sure to get that one back to me by the end of the day. And not stinking of smoke this time, Gerard. I have more notes I plan to add to it.”
     “No promises.”
・・・
     Inevitably, it was Tim who had to go hunt Gerry down at a quarter to five to get the file back. Luckily the fire exit to the left of the stairs to the archives was conspicuously propped open by an unopened carton of cigarettes and Tim pushed outside into the slightly cooler summer air.
     Gerard was lounged on the steps leading to the back alley, facing away from the door with the file open at his feet and a lit cigarette in hand. He’d tied his hair up sloppily, much like Sasha had hers, but it was so long that black sheets of it still cascaded down his bare shoulders. His trenchcoat had been completely abandoned, laid out on the step beside him, and he was left only in a crop top Tim had never seen before. It was made of a sheer grey material that matched his eyes and had no sleeves to speak of. Even worse, Gerry had a hand tucked under his shirt, shucking the top halfway up his chest. His alabaster skin shone in the dim light of the setting sun and Tim nearly took a tumble down the steps when Gerry tilted his head back to look back at him. 
     “What?” Gerry asked in a gravelly voice when he caught Tim staring. Tim opened his mouth to respond but he suddenly found himself incapable of speech. Gerry rolled his eyes and turned his head languidly back forward, lifting his cigarette to his lips. “AC’s broken inside but it’s barely any cooler out here. Don’t be a prude.”
     That surprised a laugh out of Tim. “A- A prude?!” He choked out. Never in his life had he been accused of such a thing. And this, this was so far on the opposite side of the scale he wanted to laugh. Or cry. Gerry just blew a smoke ring.
     “If you’re here for the file, it’s there.” He kicked at the manila folder at his feet and Tim could hear the wounded noise Jon would make if he were there. Right, Tim had actually come for a reason that wasn’t to ogle Gerry. Supposedly.
     “Right.” Tim cleared his throat and picked his way down the steps so as to not step on Gerry. God, did his legs have to be so long? “This thing has gotta reek by now,” he said as he bent down for the file. “Pretty sure the boss man won’t be too happy with you about that one.” He turned back and around and Gerry quickly lifted his eyes. His eyes were a warm hazy grey, much like the smoke drifting around his head.
     “Afraid of Sims then, are you?” He drawled. His piercings glinted as he grinned at Tim.
     Tim rolled his eyes and made his way back up the steps. He very pointedly kept his gaze on the ground as he did so, enticingly bare torso be damned. “Everything’s a question with you,” he said. “‘Projecting much? Afraid of Sims?’ Just call me a bottom and get on with it.”
     Gerry rasped out a chuckle right as Tim reached the top step. Tim hesitated but couldn’t help but glance back down behind him. Gerry’s head was tilted back, hair messy and top askew, and his eyes half lidded against the dying light behind Tim’s head.
     “Now where’s the fun in that?”
     He was sight to see, all stretched out and half clothed on the steps to the alley. Tim shook his head and turned back inside without another word. Gerry’s rapsing laugh followed him all the way into the archives.
     Damn tease.
SPEECHLESS. SCREAMING CRYING THROWING UP. THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT I NEEDED AND MORE THANK YOU FOR YOUR SERVICE HOLY SHIT IM LOSING MY MIND
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your-mom-friend · 2 years
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Ranking Avatars on a completely arbitrary scale:
Peter Lukas: 4/10 but only because he's funny. Don't like how he treats martin.
Simon Fairchild: 6/10 he killed a bunch of people but he's also a delightful little jokester who doesn't give a shit about the apocalypse and hangs around Peter for no reason. He's also been assigned martin-simp by Tumblr though this is a neutral point
Elias Douche-ard: 2/10 nice voice and fun to be evil with but he is also just a horrible man and I am gleeful every time he gets the shit beaten out of him it adds 2 years to my life span
Jon: 8/10 my poor little meow meow. he's really dumb sometimes but it's not totally his fault. He used to be an asshole before and is still not a perfect dude but he's trying god damnit
Jared: 7/10. Doesn't give a shit about the apocalypse either he's just having fun with his freaky powers. Points off because he terrorized people but he gave the archives business so
Gerry: 11.5/10. Rebelled against his fucked up mom and beat the shit out of Leitner. Broke the cycle of abuse and gave Jon actual information. Just wanted to rest :( He would've gotten a 12 if not for his shittily dyed hair, which was so bad it was a focal point of his appearance. A whole King.
Micheal Distortion: 8/10 what a fun twink. No toxic masculinity here no sir. He'd paint his nails. points off for his headache-laugh. Just vibing and going for his own agenda. Was going to be 7 but I gave him an extra point for his agenda against Gertrude. Was surprisingly sad when he died
Helen Disdoortion: 9/10 incredible character. Really parallels Jon earlier in her Becoming. thought that feeling guilty was a sucky emotion and stopped. Incredible.
Jane Prentiss: 5/10 I felt for her she was so scared :( but she also tried to kill like everyone and tried to literally rot a hole in reality idk what she thought she was doing actually kind of a dumb plan bestie
Oliver Banks: 9/10 character I love him so much he's incredible. No fucks to give. 1 point off because he killed a literal boat load of people but he also died so
Jude Perry: 7/10 everyone's favourite butch lesbian desolation avatar. Fun lady but also gave Jon some bad burns and wants to end the world which is not very sexy of her :/
Let me know everyone I missed and I'll do a part 2, gentles and ladymen
Edit: Part 2 is up!!
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arkturusz · 2 months
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You are so insanely talented at writing oh my god please tell me all your thoughts about tma
First and foremost thank you so much, this comment got me grinning like an idiot lmao
Where should I begin... I'm on my first listen at MAG129, though I spoiled myself quite a lot already (on purpose, I don't mind spoilers) I'm still getting used to the switch from head archivist to archivist. I'm currently experiencing a severe case of brainrot, the Jarchivist on my mind 24/7 and when I hear the name of an entity I experience some sort of primal neuron activation. I'm trying to finish the podcast before the protocol restarts, I just wanna know the whole universe before I listen to the spinoff BUT I ALSO DON'T WANNA MISS THE SPINOFF'S HYPE. Anyhow my top 3 entities are The Vast, The Extinction and The End, I believe in evil twink Elias x gilf built like a fridge Peter Lukas supremacy and I'm obsessed with Jon, his voice, his fanart, HIS VOICE GOOD LORD. I first had the idea to write a fan episode to get myself out of an otherwise crappy writing task for English class but I couldn't finish that one (plot holes are the killers of inspiration) but when I saw a bleeding computer my eyes lit up like some anime girl thinking this is my sign to try again. I'm thinking about writing one for the acrobat idea as well, I'll try to capture the feeling but I'm not running into it this time I have to figure out what it'll actually be (some pocket dimension of the spiral, some sort of hyperrealistic dream, I just feel like going about it in the "well the subway collapsed on me idfk how I made it out" approach would not leave my writer instincts satisfied). And my trick for keeping in character is imagining Jonny reading the statement in my head. All the more reason to hear his sexy voice. Anyhow if you have other ideas please send them in my AMA
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galacticgraffiti · 1 year
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✧⭒・ Liberation (3)・⭒✧
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!!! NSFW // 18+ // Minors DNI !!!
Pairing: Elia Kane x f!reader
Rating: Explicit Wordcount: 5.4k CW: lusting after The Enemy™ still, big lesbian yearning in this one, thirsting over elia generally, some feelings adjacent to romance, sweet nicknames, dirty daydreams, intense flirting, elia gets some Tragic Backstory for good measure, recalling sexy memories, vague allusions to a sex pollen flower, making out in public-ish, elia is much sweeter in this than she will be in later chapters - she is charming her prey.
A/N: Big shoutout to my darling @baba-fett who is the bestest beta-reader I could wish for. I appreciate the corrections just as much as the incoherent yelling.
✦⋆ Main Masterlist ⋆✦
༻༺༻⋆༺༻⋆༺༻ ⋆✦⋆ ༺༻⋆༺༻⋆༺༻༺
Chapter 3: The Paradise
It has only been two days since you asked Elia out, but it feels like years. 
She never kissed you two nights ago, never made a move aside from those mumbled words that made your insides tremble. You have replayed them in your mind a million times over, her smooth voice, the feeling of her hand squeezing yours before you slipped out of the apartment and into the night.
Nothing happened those two days ago, but you have been dreaming of seeing her again every second of every day.
There are the innocent daydreams: The ones where you take her to the gardens to see the wonder in her eyes as she breathes in the fresh air; where she smiles and smiles and smiles like the sun. Where she holds your hand and you get to brush the strand of hair back from her face like you have wanted to do for so long.
And there are the less innocent dreams: The ones you let yourself get lost in, where her hand tightens around yours as she pulls you into dark corners where you won’t be caught, where her lips crash against yours and you can taste her on your tongue. The dreams where you wake up panting and have to change the sheets after, the ones that make two of your own fingers never seem like enough when you dream of having hers.
Elia was quiet and polite when she said goodnight to you two days ago; she barely touched you. And yet, you can’t forget her whisper.
“Eating you out without taking you out first would really be a shame.”
You have been thinking about nothing else. Work passes by without you noticing much; you do your tasks mindlessly like a droid. Ironic, considering the reason you do what you do is because droids are not good enough at noticing the details. These days, they seem to escape you too. Everything inside you screams for Elia, no matter how hard you try to pace yourself.
She hasn’t commed you, and you worried about the fact for a bit before you realised you never left her your frequency. You have hers, but you can’t really reveal that without it seeming suspicious. 
The time you set for the date was vague - around noon, you had said, forgetting that hashing out details is not as easy when one of you lives on a government regulated compound. 
And so, you show up way too early. You tell yourself it is because you don’t want to keep her waiting, but gods, if you are honest, it is mostly your own traitorous body screaming at you. Chasing you in her direction, as if her presence could alleviate the burning desire that has settled in your belly. She sneaks into your mind even when you don’t want her to, and there is nothing you can do to focus. The thought of her always lingers at the edge of your consciousness, ready to pounce when you slip even only for a second.
Wiping away lewd daydreams, you wonder if Elia will be as forward as she was last time. Will she whisper more comments in your ear as you meander through the gardens? Or will she be shy and awkward? Whisk you away? Is it too much to dream of kissing her? Would it break you if she denied you?
A million thoughts made of pure anxiety are crawling around your head as you make your way from the station towards the compound. The approved period for the first time off the compound is limited to 24 hours - exactly one rotation - and technically, you have already wasted about 5 of them: The time period starts at 6 in the morning. Why on earth anyone would be up at that godforsaken hour is a mystery to you, but you guess everyone’s rhythm is somewhat different, and they needed some fixed point to start with.
You are walking with purpose though you don’t exactly have a plan for what you’ll do while you wait for her. But the walls of your apartment felt like they were getting tighter and tighter around you, the worry growing with every passing second, until finally, you could not bear waiting at home anymore. You worry whether she will like you.
How silly. You have seen each other once every week for more than a few months now; you have talked about the gods and the galaxy, though there are always topics you avoid. And still, now that something has changed, you worry.
Sure, you know what Elia sounds like on paper - which is bad - and you have seen a different side of her - which… nearly makes you forget about the bad side. You don’t know if that can be considered good, necessarily.
Your desire has begun to outweigh your guilty conscience, and that only makes it harder to justify your actions to yourself. Why is your body so weak? What about Elia makes your knees buckle? You wish you could answer that honestly without starting to hate yourself. There is something in her eyes when she looks at you, something so genuine and free about the smile she lets you see. It can’t all be acting. It just can’t be.
All the trembling in your bones subsides when you turn the corner and you see her. She waits for you sitting by the shadow of a barely-growing tree, eyes half closed in the sun, an open book resting on her leg. An actual book, made of flimsy and all.
You suppress a snort. How old-school of her. How High Republican. You should have known - someone who keeps dirty magazines would obviously prefer a physical book to the holobook library.
Your insides wound up tight, your steps sound way too loud on the duracrete of the courtyard. You approach slowly, as if you haven’t been rushing to get to her all morning. Now that you are actually here, you don’t know how to start. This feels different. Even if your weekly visits have become intentional rather than coincidental, this is something else. A real date. Sort of.
Elia’s head turns to you, but she doesn’t open her eyes. Her voice is warm like honey, and the sound makes you shiver, even though you are standing in the warmth of the sun.
“Hi there, pretty girl. You’re early.”
The nerve of this woman.
You decide to remain standing, your shadow falling onto her. Maybe she will open her eyes if you are in her way. Gods, those eyes - they do things to you. It feels like there is always a heat simmering just below the surface when she looks at you. Or maybe, you are just imagining things. Wishful thinking.
A smile plays around the corners of your mouth as you regard her. She looks like the lothcat that your neighbours used to have when you were a child: stretched out in a sunny spot, leaned back and completely relaxed.
The confidence that drips off of her makes your insides tingle, but there is an underlying nervousness, a hidden tension in the way she does not move. Elia’s body betrays her in tiny ways: how she taps her right foot ever so lightly, how her eyes twitch behind closed lids, how the tendons in her neck strain from keeping still.
Elia Kane is nervous, and you know her well enough to be able to tell. Something about that thought is really quite satisfying to you, and that gives you the confidence to shrug nonchalantly in response to her carefully curated facade of calmness.
“I only see one person here that has been sitting in this courtyard for what seems to be a fair while. And it’s not me.”
Elia’s hand shoots up faster than you can look to wrap around your arm, gentler than such quick movement should allow. Long fingers pull at you until you sit down next to her. Only then does she open her eyes, her smile baring those too-sharp teeth.
“And you’re still early.” Her look is warm in spite of the teasing tone.
You chuckle and lean back a little so you can look at her properly.
Elia raises an eyebrow at your glance.
“What?”
“Nothing,” you shrug, letting your eyes wander, along her body, to the book on her leg, over at the grey of the duracrete building, and back to her. Always back to her. “You just… you look good. I’ve never seen you out of uniform.”
Elia smirks, one hand sneaking over to rest on your thigh.
“Yes, you have. You just don’t want to admit you’ve been watching me while I work out.” The words should make her sound like an arsehole, but instead they just make your face heat up. Because she’s right - of course she is. And because they mean that she has noticed you watching her. 
You knew she was smart, you knew she paid attention, but you never thought you had been so obvious in your ogling.
Elia laughs at the face you make and pulls back her hand. You wish she would never stop touching you. She carefully closes the book and waves it at you.
“I’ll just take this back to the apartment, then we can go.”
“I’ll come with you,” you say hastily. The thought of sitting around in the courtyard, alone with your thoughts and thinking about what might happen is not exactly what you want for the start of your date.
At this point, you have no idea what you even want to happen. Would it not be easier if she refused you? Would it not be easier if this went horribly? You could change the schedule around again, get her a new cleaner so things would not even need to be awkward. You want Elia to make the decision for you - to absolve you from the responsibility of your own desire.
She doesn’t make it easy for you, she just nods and turns in the direction of her apartment.
You walk a half-step behind her. Elia doesn’t purposely ignore you, but she doesn’t touch you, either. Doesn’t take your hand. Every once in a while, she glances back to make sure you are keeping up with her quick, efficient steps.
The apartment is only a block away, and up quite a few levels from the courtyard. The lift waits for you, thankfully. You don’t know if you could have borne the silence of waiting for it quietly.
As you step into the tiny space, you realise your mistake.
The air fills up with Elia’s scent, the two of you crammed together in the too-tight space. You’d bet the lifts on the compound were purposely designed for only one person, because you know from experience how hard it is to get a bug to work in them. This gives the Imperials no chance to regroup, no space for secret meetings and quiet exchanges.
Ex-Imperials.
Elia’s hand grazes your hip and she adjusts. You are still touching - it is inevitable in this small space. Your breath catches for a second when she shifts and her chest presses against your arm. You swear you can feel Elia’s quiet chuckle even if it’s not audible.
Your stomach growls and you curse yourself, praying to the gods that Elia did not hear anything.
She leans forward to reach over you and press the button up to her floor, her hot breath at your neck. You try so hard not to let it affect you, not to focus on the sound of her breathing, not to think that if she only turned her head to the side ever so slightly, she could kiss you.
“I could have pressed the button,” you mumble, your voice shaky.
“Thanks for the offer, sweetheart.” She smirks at you, and your silly heart stumbles at the nickname, so casual out of her mouth. “Bit late now, isn’t it?”
You don’t answer as the lift starts moving. It’s only a few seconds up to Elia’s floor, but they feel like an eternity when you can feel her body against yours. When all you wanna do is ask her to kiss you, and the only thing keeping you from it is the shit-eating grin that is plastered across her face. You don’t want to give her the damn satisfaction.
Stars, you should have just waited in the courtyard. What’s wrong with open, sunny duracrete spaces?
When the doors slide open, Elia does not wait for you to get off the lift - she just squeezes past you, her hand brushing yours like it’s a coincidence, her chest pressed close to yours for just the fraction of a second. Following after her, you hope that she can’t see the frankly embarrassing level of turned on that you currently are in your eyes.
Elia slips into the apartment quickly. You awkwardly linger outside, cursing yourself. You should have been brave enough to go inside with her and tell her to forget about the gardens, all you want to do is get on your knees for her. Looking back, you couldn’t even tell what you were hoping to accomplish by coming with her aside from that fact, and now you are too cowardly to go for it. And in too deep to turn around and leave, and pretend like you are not head over heels in lust with a goddamn former imperial officer.
Elia reappearing in the door frame interrupts your self-loathing. She has something in her hand which she offers to you without a word.
It’s an imperial red travel biscuit.
This time, you can’t help but admire the nerve of the fucking woman. The sheer audacity.
You are actually not quite sure if a civilian would know what this stupid biscuit means, so you take it from the palm of her hand and pretend to inspect it.
“For me?”
“Yeah.” Casually, Elia takes a bite of her own, then gestures for you to open the small package. “Thought we might get a snack before we sit on the speedertrain for a half hour. I don’t think I had breakfast this morning.”
Now that she mentions it, you don’t think you did either; your tummy too nervous to even think about ingesting anything. The gesture is odd, but also somewhat… endearing? It feels like she is trying to take care of you without knowing how to seem inconspicuous about it.
“Thank you.” You try to keep your tone neutral as you rip open the clear packaging and take a bite. It’s… bland. There is nothing interesting about the taste. Maybe a hint of Berry Fruit, with a great deal of goodwill.
Elia looks at you expectantly.
“So? Do you like it?”
You chew. The papery texture of the biscuit sticks to the roof of your mouth.
“Yeah!” you say, making your voice sound much more enthusiastic than you actually are (which is not at all).
“Liar.” Elia grins. She raises her hand to wipe the corner of your mouth with her thumb. Your heart nearly bursts from your chest at the touch.
“Crumb,” she shrugs in explanation and lets her hand fall back to her side.
“Oh,” you murmur awkwardly and wipe your mouth. Elia watches you with burning eyes, tracing the path of your finger along your lip.
“I got it,” she says, her voice suddenly soft instead of teasing. “You look perfect.”
Fuck if she doesn’t know how to make your breath stutter.
“I… thanks.” Gods, you swear you usually have more game than this. Something about her disarms you, makes you feel so small compared to her. In a good way. Like she would stop at nothing to make you hers. She is so much. Her presence is intoxicating, and you feel like her glittering words and smooth voice could convince you of anything. You have the high ground - at least morally speaking - but your body does not seem to want to comply with that logic.
Elia smiles at you. It’s a genuine smile, one that makes you think that you want to see her smile like this again and again. One that makes you hope that the gardens will be as beautiful to her as they are to you.
“Come on.” Elia starts walking. She takes the stairs this time, thankfully. You don’t know if your poor heart would have survived another lift ride squished against her steely abdominal muscles with her plush lips nearly close enough to kiss.
“Let’s go,” you sigh, regretting every choice you have ever made that led you here, and simultaneously wishing she would turn around to press you up against the wall. 
Elia smiles at you like she can read your mind.
****
The train ride to the closest of the gardens passes quickly.
After the awkwardness from last time when you sat in Elia’s apartment, quiet over steaming mugs of tea, she is now a sheer wellspring of energy. She feels even livelier than usually, which you suppose is only natural since she is not feeling sick today.
You find out more things that you could never know from reading her records: Elia Kane is a good listener. She makes you feel understood with every response and every gesture. She doesn’t interrupt. She is funny - and she smiles a lot. At a little Wookie baby that is barely as big as your head. At an old Togruta lady that she seems to recognise from somewhere at the train platform. At you, again and again.
Her joy is so infectious that your cheeks already hurt from smiling when you arrive at the gardens.
“Have you ever been here?” you ask on your walk to the airlock. The gardens could never refresh the air of an entire planet, so the fresh oxygen they produce is kept inside a gigantic air bubble - a treat for the visitors. Of which there are never many, which never ceases to astound you. The gardens are a small paradise on an overcrowded duracrete, plastoid planet. You’d think more people would miss the sight and smell of nature.
“I have,” Elia’s answer interrupts your musings. “It was… many years ago. While I- well. I was trained here on Coruscant. At the Academy, I mean.”
She makes a pause, as if she is waiting for you to freak out over this surreptitious mention of the Empire. You don’t - not externally. Internally, you flinch at the reminder of her past. Somehow, you managed to avoid the topic for weeks and even on the entire train ride here. Selfishly, it is not something you like to think about. Selfishly, you want to focus on how good her arms look in the too-tight shirtsleeves, how close her hand is to yours, how one of her teeth is slightly crooked and she smells like summer rain.
When you don’t respond to Elia’s tentative answer except for an encouraging nod, she goes on.
“I loved the gardens. We weren’t allowed a lot of free time - but I stole the hours whenever I could. I missed my home planet, I missed the greenery.” Her smile becomes a little mischievous. “I had my first kiss here in the gardens. A girl I trained with, a… a pilot.”
You grin at the blush that rises to her tan cheeks, bringing out her freckles. Elia elbows you in the side.
“Hey, don’t laugh at me. It was my first love, I think. I was barely fourteen. I thought we’d be together forever.”
There is a sudden sadness in her eyes that you can’t quite place. 
Gently, trying not to pry or be insensitive, you ask, “What happened?”
“She… left.” Elia sounds defeated. She laughs bitterly. “I guess I can’t even be mad about it. Not anymore. She deserted, and it was- I… it was the right thing to do, of course. Stars, I should have gone with her. Maybe my life would have turned out differently.”
Her confession shocks you, but you try your best to hide it.
She had loved a deserter.
But she loved the Empire more, a nagging voice in the back of your head says. You shush it. She regrets not leaving the Empire.
“I’m… sorry?” It comes out sounding like a question. Elia throws you a small smile.
“Don’t be. I just wish I knew if she ever really made it.”
You reach out without thinking and take Elia’s hand. Her eyes widen a bit, but she lets your fingers wrap around hers. She squeezes. You smile.
The programmed clearing of an artificial throat interrupts the moment.
“Dear visitors, welcome to the Coruscanti gardens of sector Resh-12. Please be aware that your stay at the gardens will be limited to exactly four hours. You must leave the premises when the allotted time runs out.”
The droid that has quietly buzzed up to you to interrupt pauses its monologue to scan your chain codes. There is a pause after the scan that somehow manages to sound disapproving.
“Elia Kane, as a member of the Amnesty Programme, you will be reminded that you are not allowed to leave the premises without your assigned companion.”
“Good,” Elia responds as if the droid cares for an answer, and squeezes your hand again. “I don’t plan to.”
Another beat.
“As the assigned companion to Elia Kane, her conduct is your responsibility,” the droid then continues, now addressing you. “You may not leave the premises without her. You may not let her out of your sight. You may not-”
“Yes, yes, I got that lecture already,” you murmur, annoyed that a moment of deeper connection was interrupted quite rudely.
“If you have already received the safety lecture, you may skip this service reminder. Any legal responsibility for this step lies with you,” the droid drones on, showing no emotional response to your obvious annoyance. Of course not. It’s not a feeling model, not for a lowly task such as this.
“Yes, I’d like to skip.” You wave your hand impatiently. “I am well aware of my responsibilities and duties.”
“Very well. Your slot closes in four hours from now.” The droid hands out a small bracelet to you, the digits on the small display counting down the minutes from 240. “This will issue a half-hour warning. This is government property. Please return upon exiting the park. Collection boxes are placed at the various exits. Enjoy your stay at the Coruscant Regenerational Gardens.”
With those words, the droid buzzes off to bother another couple of visitors that have just arrived on the landing platform.
Elia looks at you. You look at her. And you burst into laughter.
Giggling wildly, you make your way through the airlock and into the gardens, following one of the many footpaths. As you recover from the laughing fit, your conversation returns to easier topics: Things you do in your free time, things Elia does in her free time. The book she is currently reading, the new holoseries that is coming out, set in the Old Republic, about a gunslinger in the Outer Rim.
The garden is very beautiful, rich in flora you have never seen before. You appreciate the thought that was put into designing every nook and cranny of the place. There are many pathways that lead into different sections, and the area is so expansive that it feels like you are completely alone. The two of you barely run into other people as you explore the different sections: Reproductions of Chandrila’s rolling hills, the jungles of Felucia, the calming style of Corvian gardens with its artificial springs and tiny bridges.
You buy Elia a frozen treat in the shape of a Wroshyr tree, and she gets you a small cup of tea when you pass by a droid vendor.
The conversation flows easily - there is so much you want to know about Elia, and she is not shy asking you questions about your life, either.
And you talk about the gardens - pointing out the flowers you know from home, the plants that Elia knows. Her eyes light up when she sees an oddly shaped pink flower, and she tugs on your hand so you’ll smell it. The scent is enchanting, and you gladly listen to Elia as she details the different ways to brew tea from the flower. Apparently, the steeping time is crucial: Too short and the tea can cause stomach cramps, too long and the drinker is left in a sort of mindless stupor for a few hours.
“But get it right,” she says, the molten gold of her eyes focusing intently on you, “...get it just right, and it gives you the most delicious little high. It makes everything more intense - smell, touch, taste…”
Her eyes fall onto your lips. You swallow thickly. Elia smirks her inimitable smile.
“Lot of fun to fuck while you’re riding that high,” she adds, almost absently. Casually, even, if it were not for the look in her eyes, suddenly so full of the same intense hunger you know so well.
A small sound escapes you at the shift in Elia’s voice. The mood has changed abruptly - the air is heavier, this corner of the garden seems darker. You can feel the pleasant coil of arousal in your belly as you take in the sight of her - the shirt that’s so tight around her upper arms, the full, rosy lips, her pupils that seem ever so slightly blown out as she looks at you.
You clear your throat.
“Sounds like you’re speaking from experience.” Your mouth feels quite dry suddenly, the thought of Elia in the privacy of her apartment surging to the forefront of your mind - pearls of sweat beading on her flawless skin, the cords of muscle pulling taut as she hovers above you, the feeling of her thick thigh pushing between your legs and-
“Mhh,” Elia’s voice is full of amusement. “I’ll tell you about it some other time. Looking at you, we should probably keep moving. The flower can… affect you even from smell if you’re not used to it. Or so I’ve heard.”
She leans closer to you, that damn strand of hair falling in her face as she pulls you closer until her lips nearly touch the shell of your ear.
“And I need my girl to keep her wits about her. Can’t have you high on some rare flower the first time I fuck you. That’d be cheating.”
You choke quite inelegantly, and Elia bursts out laughing. She lets go of your hand to lean away from you, chuckling as she watches you trying to catch your breath. You raise a finger as if to scold her, but the words get stuck in your throat when she suddenly turns back towards you again, her movements smooth like those of a Nexu on the prowl.
Elia doesn’t slow down, so you stumble backwards, your eyes locked with hers until you feel something hard and unforgiving against your back - the trunk of a thick tree. Elia presses up against you, her strong arms caging you in as golden eyes melt into yours.
“Tell me you haven’t thought about it,” she demands, her voice dark and breathy. “Tell me you haven’t thought about it every time we were in my apartment together - every time we crossed paths in the courtyard.”
Your brain is not functional, lagging miles behind. All you can think about is her lips - her beautiful lips - and her neck - her beautiful neck, and gods, if only you could-
“Kiss me,” you say, your voice stronger than you thought it would be. The desire outweighs the embarrassment. Softer, you add, “...please.”
Elia’s breath shudders. She looks at you with her impossibly warm eyes, she waits for you to pull back, to escape from her. You don’t. You were trapped long before she pushed you up against that tree.
She leans in slowly, savouring the thrill of anticipation. You feel her breath mingling with yours, and then her lips touch yours, and nothing else matters anymore: Not the flowers, not the sharp wood digging into your back, not the past or present or the future. Not even the Empire.
Elia is the only air you want to breathe, and you drink her in greedily, like you have been starving for years before you got to taste her. She responds in kind, one muscular thigh pressing between yours. Her hand wraps around your wrists, keeping them in place as she licks into your mouth.
You can’t suppress the moan that rises in your throat, and Elia’s deep chuckle runs through you like a shiver.
Impatiently, you move your hips to grind down against her leg. Elia makes a strangled sound at that, and even in the haze of your pleasure you find a certain satisfaction in having caught her off-guard.
Strong hands sneak around your waist, touching, caressing, grabbing whatever they can reach. Elia moans into your mouth unabashedly. There is no holding back neither for you nor for her, and you smile into the kiss.
She leans back to look at you, eyebrow raised. She looks so indignant that you can’t help but laugh quietly.
“What?” Her lips are swollen and her eyes so dark you can’t tell where the pupil ends.
“Nothing,” you smile and pull her back in for a shorter, sweeter kiss. You mumble against her lips, “I just thought that you sounded exactly like all my dreams.” 
*****
You barely manage to keep your hands off each other, but after a moment of debating - you sat in Elia’s lap, your arms looped around her neck, stealing kisses whenever you can - you both agree that even though you really, really want to be alone together, it would be a shame not to make use of your time at the gardens.
And so, the two of you wander about, looking for private corners where you can slip your hand up Elia’s shirt, where she can hoist you up so you can wrap your legs around her as she kisses you like you are the last thing she will ever get to taste.
One time, one of the guard droids nearly catches you, which is for many reasons so much worse than actual people walking in on you making out. You decide to keep it a little more lowkey after that, but that does not prevent Elia from whispering absolutely filthy things into your ear while you wander the gardens and inhale the fresh air.
You do talk - you find out that your and Elia’s taste in music matches, and that her favourite food is Sic-Six-Layer Cake from a diner here on Coruscant that has apparently existed forever. She confesses that she is really quite bad at sabacc, and that she always wanted to have a Massiff as a pet when she was younger.
By the time the bracelet on your arm vibrates, you simultaneously feel like you have never found out more about a person in a shorter period of time, and like you could fill hours and days and years more with what you still want to know.
As you slowly make your way through the park and back to the exit, Elia squeezes your hand. When she speaks, her voice sounds surprisingly hesitant.
“Would you… would you come back to mine?”
You furrow your brow.
“Well, yeah. I assumed I’d drop you off at the compound - I mean, I kinda have to, you know, with the-”
The words die on your tongue as you realise what she is really asking you. It’s one thing to make out in a public park, even if you have few inhibitions. It’s another to actually do this. To go back to hers. Spend the night with her.
Elia’s fingers glide over the soft spot on your wrist that makes you shiver.
That is the moment you fully give in. You were lost to Elia Kane weeks ago, but quietly, secretly, you held onto the hope that it would not become anything more if only you could let off some steam. That hope dies with the softness of her touch on your warm skin.
“Yes,” you say quietly. “Yes, I’ll come back to yours.”
༻༺༻⋆༺༻⋆༺༻ ⋆✦⋆ ༺༻⋆༺༻⋆༺༻༺
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Hello my sweet plums, I promise you we are getting somewhere. This is the slowest burn I have ever tortured myself with and if that's not the most lesbian thing I could possibly do then I don't even know anymore.
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katshuya · 2 months
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I'm sure I'm not the only one who is astonished with the very clever arguments and discussions Rhaelya's supporters write and the oh so-called neutrals who are just TOO LOGICAL to blame Rhaegar. He is just a grey character, and we just lack criticism.
How? Well!
Rhaegar isn't to blame because in a dream, he and other kingsguard said it was Jaime's fault. You see how logical it is? The author hints it, so it's the logic truth.
Jaime is the real reason why Elia and her children are dead because he was a kingsguard and being the single sole protector of Elia and her children against his father's army means nothing. Apparently, he can hold them all off with a single command.
Dragonstone is very safe from Aerys even though he is the king, and with single command, they could be brought to him.
Rhaegar took all kingsguard to the Trident because it was war. And in war, you need to win, so you take every knight to assure your winning and leave your family guarded with a single knight who is also under pressure of obeying the king and even if he didn't he is still outnumbered and could be killed or held off.
We can't blame Rhaegar for abandoning them in kingslanding. Why? Because he thought he was going to win! He had a plan. You see?!
And we can't blame him for the rebellion. Why? Because in a different scenario in my mind, it could have been sparked by someone else in different ways! So we can't blame the people responsible for the original scenario.
Anything George says or thinks is the right and logical one, and we can't criticize it for being ridiculous. Because the writer is always right about what he writes. I mean, so what if he thinks dany x drogo was hella sexy? We should think it so, too!
Daemon killing his wife is grey morality.
And many other things, he says, but let's not get into that for now.
So yes. If George says something is logical, then it's logical.
It's very natural for Elia not to feel sad or humiliated when Rhaegar goes to another girl, especially after endangering her life to give him the prophecy children one after another. Her PaLAtOnIC feelings toward him made her ready to risk her life in that certain way. One after another when she had delicate health. She endangered herself with no rest between pregnancies because of these PALATONIC feelings! She wanted to be queen, which is what made her do that, too. There is absolutely no way for her to be hurt. That's just ilogical. Especially for a Dornish.
I read a post from a proclaimed neutral, and oh my god. I just don't understand the ability of these people to write these posts and not feel embarrassed with how logical and unbiased they are.
Let me tell you something. Someone who claims logic will not say Rhaegar never hurt Elia with Lyanna and/or she was totally fine with it.
That's a covered lie. They just like Rhaegar way more than Elia. Not necessary a stan. Simply like him and want others to believe in that supposed logic.
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threadsun · 8 months
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Don't know if the ask game is still going but if it is
Period sex with all the snaccpop guys? (Could be on their period, the fic of trans Jean fucking Joseph is still sending me)
Yessss >:3c
Jack:
Your period - 10/10 orgasms are a great painkiller!
His period - 5/10 his aren't super bad, and he tends to just want to keep going as normal. So yeah, he'll still have sex with you, but it's not a Thing for him
Ian:
Your period - 100/10 he's an absolute freak about it
His period - -100/10 please he feels so awful and gross and in pain, don't try to touch him or make him horny
Shaun:
Your period - 10/10 blood kink go brrrr
His period - 10/10 blood kink go brrrr
Nick:
Your period - 7/10 he doesn't see it as anything super special, but he does love getting as much of you inside of him as possible...
His period - 8/10 it helps relieve his cramps and he likes the sight of his blood on you~
Joseph:
Your period - 6/10 if it'll help you, he's more than happy to! He just likes making you feel good
His period - 1/10 if you want to, he'll let you, but he doesn't feel good about it. He gets nauseous when he's horny on his period
Jean:
Your period - 5/10 he's not particularly into it, but he's not a coward
His period - 10/10 god he loves when you fuck him on his period
Rory:
Your period - 10/10 he loves lazily going down on your or fingering you or fucking you during it. Anything!
His period - 10/10 please it helps with his cramps so much, he just wants a week of lazy sex in bed
Barry:
Your period - 0/10 or 10/10 depending on how uncomfortable it makes you >:3c
His period - 0/10 he prefers to take care of himself when he's on his period
Bo:
Your period - 3/10 you smell different on your period which freaks him out a bit, but he loves fucking you so...
His period - 0/10 he feels so sluggish and sweaty, he doesn't wanna have sex
Elias:
Your period - 10/10 it's the honourable thing to do (and he finds it very sexy)
His period - 3/10 he's embarrassed about how much he bleeds, but he does enjoy it
Taylor:
Your period - 100/10 this man is Not Normal about it
His period - 100/10 this man is Not Normal about it
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princessmeepa · 2 months
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I am going to pick the voice actors for my gods, RS’ dream cast for her LO live action is just for points and not even there to play the roles and she only picks her celebrity crush Mads to be Christian blue I know. So I am going to pick the voice actors who can fit my characters perfectly and here they are. So let’s start with the goddesses. Ok let’s gooo!
Note: some of the characters have the same voice actresses and who voiced their characters from the same anime, because I want to fit some of the voices, who can fit my characters.
Alecto: Avalon Penrose, who voiced Megaera from Hades.
Aglaea: Reba Buhr, who voiced Aphrodite from Record of Ragnarok.
Amphitrite: Michelle Rojas, who voiced Wendy from Show by Rock.
Aphrodite: Dorothy Elias-Fahn, who voiced Komi Shuuko from Komi can’t communicate.
Athena: Erika Harlacher, who voiced Kyoko Kirigiri from Danganronpa (the game).
Ariadne: Michelle Ruff, who voiced Katherine McBride from Catherine.
Artemis: Carli Mosier, who voiced Saeko Tanaka from Haikyū!!
Atropos: Mara Junot, who voiced Lisa from Genshin Impact.
Calliope: Natalie Hoover, who voiced Tsukino from Show by Rock.
Calypso: Brianna Knickerbocker, who voices Swim from One Punch Man
Chloris: Brianna Knickerbocker, who voiced Rin from Catherine: Full Body
Cleo: Lauren Landa, who voiced Sailor Neptune / Michiru Kaioh from Sailor Moon: Sailor Stars.
Clotho: Kayli Mills, who voiced Runa Yomozuki from Kakegurui.
Daphne: Ashly Burch, who voiced Sasha Braus from Attack on Titan.
Demeter: Heather Masters, who voiced Circus Baby from FNAF.
Echo: Stephanie Sheh, who voiced Sailor Moon / Usagi Tsukino from Sailor Moon or Luci Christian who voiced Duck/Princess Tutu from Princess Tutu.
Eos: Krystal LePort, who voiced Brooke from HuniePop 2.
Eris: Michelle Ruff, who voiced Kirari Momobami from Kakegurui.
Eurydice: Erica Mendez, who voiced Retsuko from Aggretsuko.
Gaia: Same thing with Demeter, but with a cute and girly Greek accent.
Hebe: Anairis Quinones, who voiced Goll from Record of Ragnarok.
Hecate: Alexis Tipton, who voiced Chuchu from Show by Rock.
Hedone: Laura Bailey, who voiced Catherine from Catherine.
Hera: Erin Fitzgerald, who voiced Eudial from Pretty Guardian Sailor Moon Crystal.
Hestia: Jamie Marchi, who voiced Panty from Panty and Stocking.
Iris: Brittney Karbowski, who voiced Ryou Fujibayashi from Clannad.
Lachesis: Erica Lindbeck, who voiced Sayaka Igarashi in Kakegurui.
Leto: Casey Mongillo, who voiced Nene Onemine from Komi Can't Communicate.
Leuce: Dorothy Fahn, who voiced Sumika Warakubami / Kawaru Natari from Kakegurui
Libya: Kira Buckland, who voiced Princess Aurora Sya Lis Goodereste in Sleepy Princess from the Demon Castle.
Maia: Cherami Leigh, who voiced Kaede Otori from Komi Can't Communicate.
Marakria: Monica Rial, who voiced Moa in Show from Rock (if that’s possible)
Medea: Brianna Knickerbocker, who voiced Rumia Uru from Kakegurui.
Megaera: Emi Lo, who voiced Suma in Demon Slayer.
Melinoe: Kira Buckland, who voiced Mary Saotome from Kakegurui Twin and Kakegurui.
Metis: Laura Post, who voiced Brunhilde in Record of Ragnarok.
The other 6 Muses: Bryn Apprill.
Nyx: Hellena Taylor, who voiced Bayonetta from the Bayonetta games, but with sexy a Greek accent.
Pasithea: Bridget Hoffman, who voiced Nia Teppelin from Gurren Lagann.
Peitho: Kayli Mills, who voiced Emilia in Re:ZERO.
Persephone: Maggie Flecknoe, who voiced Yui Komori in Diabolik Lovers.
Perse: Brianna Knickerbocker, who voice Rem in Re:ZERO
Psyche: Erika Harlacher, who voiced Yumeko Jabami from Kakegurui
Rhea: Elizabeth Maxwell, who voiced Rosaria from Genshin Impact.
Selene: Shannon Chan, who voiced Misa Amane from Death Note.
Semele: Brenna Larsen, who voiced Navia from Genshin Impact.
Thetis: Kate Higgins, who voiced Sailor Mercury/ Ami Mizuno from Sailor Moon.
Tisiphone: Sarah Williams, who voiced Midari Ikishima from Kakegurui
Urania: Anairis Quinones, who voiced Hinatsuru in Demon Slayer.
And for the Mortal women:
Andromeda: Bryn Apprill, who voiced Krista Lenz / Historia Reiss from Attack on Titan.
Cassandra: Erica Lindbeck, who voiced Daki from Demon Slayer.
Helen of Troy: Cristina Vee, who voiced Sailor Mars / Rei Hino.
Phaedra: Juliet Simmons, who voiced Inaho Yamato from Kakegurui
Penelope: Abby Trott, who voiced Inui from Aggretsuko.
What do you guys think?
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thepalaceofmelanie · 4 months
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Martell Week- COTD: Oberyn Martell
Tag: @elvinaa @adriennegabriella @morby @candycanes19 @wingsoftheangels @tashastrange89
(A/N: Okay so we had a House Martell music task...well, I want to do that for just Oberyn. So the first ten are songs with my reasoning, while the last ten are certain lyrics that fit him without my reasoning. Plus, this helps me get a playlist for Oberyn started for use. Enjoy the ride! Also am working on Day 2 and 3, so hopefully I can get those done tonight.)
1- “Unholy (Japanese Version)” by: Shayne Orok, Curserino & Ali Orok
Reasoning: Alright, pick any version of Unholy; I don’t care if it’s the OG to a cover or whatever else, this version screams Oberyn. It’s slow and sensual and sexy, to say the least, I recommend this song for any smut/lemon playlist.
2- “Oberyn” by: Daenerys and Targaryens
Reasoning: Please, do yourself a favor! Go and listen to this song. It’s so fun and a bit funny but it’s about him! So enjoy fellow Oberyn fans.
3- “Letter To A Friend” by: Robert Gromotka and Chiharu Bley Violoncello
Reasoning: I feel this would be his theme song back in Dorne. More so when he’s in the Water Garden writing poems for his daughters. It’s just something that would make you think of him feeling calm for lack of a better term.
4- “Bow Down” by: I, Prevail
Reasoning: Basically, this song is could be his theme song when trying to avenge his Sister and her children. I did have this one down in the lyric area but switched it because, of how it just works more so as a whole.
5- “Crossing Over” by: Five Finger Death Punch
Reasoning: So, after watching the Bills game, I was trying to think what else to add and remember this old gem. This song is about loss and grieving and well, he lost Elia. Also you could use this song for Ellaria as well, when the second verse.
6- “Adrenalize” by: In This Moment
Reasoning: If I had to give Oberyn’s “infamous for his sexual appetite” as the wiki puts it, a theme song, it would be this. It’s hard, heavy and well a sex song.
7- “Tonight” by: Fozzy
Reasoning: “Then everyone is missing half the world’s pleasure. The gods made women… and it delights me. The gods made men… and it delights me. When it comes to war, I fight for Dorne. When it comes to love — I don’t choose sides.”
8- “One Of The Girls” by: Jennie Kim, Lily-Rose Depp, and The Weeknd
“We don't gotta be in love, no
I don't gotta be the one, no
I just wanna be one of your girls tonight
We don't gotta be in love, no
I don't gotta be the one, no
I just wanna be one of your girls tonight, oh”
9- “Emperor’s New Clothes” by: Panic! At The Disco
“I'm taking back the crown
I'm all dressed up and naked
I see what's mine and take it
(Finders keepers, losers weepers)”
10- “Love You To Death” by: Type O Negative
“In her place one hundred candles burning
As salty sweat drips from her breast
Her hips move and I can feel what they're saying, swaying
They say the beast inside of me is gonna get ya, get ya, get”
11- “Hangman” by: Rev Theory
“Take your places please
You’ll need to sit for this one
It’s a simple plan
With a mangled conclusion”
12- “Go Girl” by: Pitbull
“I party like a rockstar
Look like a movie star
Play like an all star
Fuck like a pornstar”
13- “The Whims of Fate -King Side” cover by: FamilyJules feat Kuraiinu
“Give into another vice
See where it might lead
Come on, let's just enjoy the spice
Life and feel so free
Give into temptation”
14- “So Far Away” by: Staind
“This is my life
Its not what it was before
All these feelings I've shared
And these are my dreams
That I'd never lived before
Somebody shake me
'Cause I
I must be sleeping”
15- “Young Gods” by: Hasley
“He says, "Ooh, baby girl, don't get cut on my edges
I'm the king of everything and oh, my tongue is a weapon
There's a light in the crack that's separating your thighs
And if you wanna go to heaven, you should fuck me tonight"”
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venndaai · 2 years
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relistening to calamity ep 1 and Asmodeus really set Zerxus up so comprehensively with that vision of him banishing the Dawnfather to protect Asmodeus- 1) that should have been our very first clue to Zerxus’s hubris, and it’s pretty clever how we just accepted it because dnd is all about making players feel powerful, and 2) that was total confirmation to Zerxus that he did have the power of a god, that he was more powerful than them! like of course he later tries to put a god in time out, it worked the last time! and “no mortal would do what you have done,”- again, setting Zerxus up as special and above everyone else.
but also oh my god what a fuckin. own goal for Asmodeus because he set himself up for Zerxus’s pity there! I think he was maybe going for a sort of “noble, tragically betrayed but still awesomely ancient god dispensing fatherly wisdom to his “child””, but he completely screwed it up by throwing that vision of Elias in at the start and placing Zerxus’s tormented dreaming mind fully in paternal guilt mode. to be fair, most normal people would not look at an “older than the world” 400 foot horned giant man and go “it’s free opportunity to assuage my guilt child”, so I can’t totally blame him, but I do find it very funny, and it gets even funnier when you think about how his next move was “sexy wounded deer” and all that did was make the situation more freudian
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anysin · 4 months
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Fic: After Wonders End
For an anon who wished for "terminal illness" AU for JonElias, here is an angsty piece set in S4 where Jon's encounter with Jared led to major eye gore and therefore to slow death from lack of Beholding! SFW but with sexy implications.
After Wonders End
The Eye has long since abandoned Jon, but he knows there is only one person in the world who would bother to come to his flat.
"Elias," Jon says, smiling into the darkness. "I suppose I should be shocked that you're out of prison, but I'm not. I'm really not."
"Let me in, then." Elias doesn't wait for him to agree; he grasps Jon by his shoulders, moving him gently to the side as he enters the flat, closing the door behind him. Jon can hear him start to take his coat and shoes off, pace around a bit once he lets Jon go; Jon lets him, turning his face towards the direction of the sound, hoping that it bothers Elias. Hoping that the sight of him bothers Elias.
"I am here to express my condolences, of course." Jon will give it to him; Elias does a good job of sounding apologetic. "I knew Jared Hopworth was a brute, but I didn't think he had the power to mangle your eyes like this."
Jon snorts. "Do you ever get bored with your own crap?"
Something like fear flutters in his stomach when he hears Elias march towards him, but Jon stays still; he grunts when Elias grabs him by the arms, pulls him close. He can feel Elias's breath on his lips, hear its fast rhythm. For once, Elias is agitated, and Jon will take it as a victory.
"You have no idea what that creature took away from me," Elias states. "What wonders he robbed from me."
Elias's grip loosens a bit, and he pulls back. His hand raises up, his thumb stroking along Jon's cheek, catching onto the few worm scars on the otherwise smooth skin.
"And you were a wonder, Jon." Elias's voice has gone soft, reverent. "Even now, you are."
Jon shudders, reaching up to grasp Elias by his wrist.
"You have no right to speak to me that way," he says. "Your god has condemned me to death."
He knows he has been getting weaker and weaker ever since the Eye left him; he was in too deep, relied on it too much, and now he can no longer survive without it. It's only a matter of time until he withers away for good. Elias has no right to talk about wonders to him.
"I know. That's why I'm here." Ignoring Jon's grip, Elias cups his cheek fully, his other hand curling tighter around Jon's arm. "I failed you, Jon. The least I can do is not abandon you too."
A hiss escaping from between his teeth, Jon tries to pull away. But Elias holds onto him, yanking him close until Jon can feel his hot breath again, and a second later, his even hotter mouth.
None of this should matter.
Jon grunts, trying to pull away again, but he knows it's for the show; when Elias persists, his arm winding around Jon's waist, Jon gives up, his hands rising up to Elias's shoulders. He pulls back from the kiss just enough to bite Elias hard on his lower lip before kissing him again, hoping that the kiss stings. Hurts.
"You abandoned me already, though," Jon remarks when the second kiss ends, when Elias wraps his other arm around him too and embraces him tight. "How do I know you won't do it again?"
Elias says nothing first, resting his face into Jon's hair.
"See, Jon," he says, "I have nowhere to go, either. Nowhere but to you."
Jon grits his teeth together. He wishes he could cry.
"Come then," he says, shrugging free from Elias's embrace so he can take his hand, and take him to the bedroom.
In a way, Elias's words could even be true. But they don't have to be; at this point, Jon will take them anyway.
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elias-rights · 2 years
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jonah magnus is just. what a guy. he somehow figured how to transfer himself into different bodies using eyes. he's a horrible bastard. he's hot. he's the essence of being pinned down by a searching gaze and found wanting. he's fascinated by human behavior despite having 200 years to watch everyone around him. he murdered a guy with a steel pipe that one time. he started the apocalypse. he became a conduit for an eldritch god. i want to see him in a corner and weakened just to watch him squirm. i want to watch him put someone else in a corner and watch them squirm. he desperately needs to control the narrative and it's never shown Why. he let his archivist be kidnapped and forcibly moisturized (and isn't That a sentence) for a month, just to make sure the Stranger's mark stuck. he's ruthless and practical and clever. he interacts with the world like it's four different chess games stitched together, and he's winning all of them at once. i want to see him grab someone jon by the face and talk in a very quiet threatening certain tone. i want to see him in his element. i want to see him out of his element. he's terrifyingly confident. he's the Ceaseless Watcher's creature and he's been of it for two hundred years. he's Such a guy and i have so many thoughts about him and now they're your problem too
And even further: He's an old man. He's a funny bitch. He's dramatic. He's shockingly subdued. He loves scheduling. He condemned the entire world to something worse than death because he feared someone would do it to him first. He's horny about being compelled. He likes cake. He compared Jon's wounds to swiss cheese. He makes puns. He wrote a ritual in iambic meter. Nobody finds out why he's like that. When Tim was going through his crisis Elias just told him to paperwork the sorrows away. He has so much repressed anger and yet he's so civil. He views the world as a zero-sum game. He won. He lost. I want him to thrive. I want him to lose everything he has in his pursuit and not realise it until it is too late. He's genre-aware. I want the narrative to love him as much as I do. He never used his powers on Gertrude and this was mutual. He killed her with a gun and said she died in the line of duty. Either he lied about watching Melanie's channel or he just browses paranormal YouTube for fun. He was the only one who figured out how the rituals worked. He had enough architectural expertise to modify Robert Smirke's blueprints to make them evil. He had a harem. He's even sexy.
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