There is no filter. This picture was taken as I was opening my eyes after meditating.
Frequency was cracking dimensions
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i think an incredibly funny part of the aiichi dynamic is that at least one of them has to be traumatized and/or possess incredible worldly exhaustion in order to even consider the other as a romantic love interest
like they need to go through decades and time loops of war and hopelessness and death and destruction in order to be like huh maybe this guy isn't so bad
of course this doesnt go for every fic (academy blues my beloved) but. a lot of them do and it's SO funny
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I still continue to see criticism of season 2 of OFMD and I just. Find it so funny honestly. Like I get some of it, maybe, kinda. But for the most part I’m like ????? Nah don’t agree. Skill issue. I find it even funnier when people complain about the pacing being too fast because I honestly always felt the first season was too slow with its pacing. So season 2 was actually kinda perfect to me! I’m not the type to complain about what we were given and wish it was different though. I eat up every morsel they allow us to have, and to have jammed in so much content had me in paradise tbh. It is what it is, you know? I accept it all as just what we’ve got. And maybe that’s me just first and foremost loving the show as what it is- Ed and Stede’s story. Everything else is just a cherry on top for me. I’m here to have fun and if it can do that for me, I’m all good. And going into it with that mindset, guess what? I had a GREAT time. I sat down and rewatched the show in one day in its entirety two days after the finale with a friend who had never seen it. They loved it! I loved it, again! Id watch it again already!!! I parry criticisms of the show with great ease- who cares, it was fun, I loved it. That’s what mattered to me! Must suck to feel otherwise! :3 I’m kicking my feet n giggling over this little found family and my favorite boys in love. Teehee. Best show ever.
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Hey! I just wanted to like. personally thank you for your tags on that post about being 13-15. I’m 20 and I’m just. I don’t know. It’s really nice to know that there’s no rush to get my shit together. You don’t have to post this if you don’t want, but from one stranger to another, thank you. I hope the future is kind to us both.
You are /more/ than welcome Anon.
I know when I was around 17-20, I wish someone would have told me that. I wish someone would have reassured me
"You're not an '''adult''' by 30. In fact, the idea of 'becoming an adult' is a lie. Everyone is a child, slowly figuring things out.
You'll be 25 and be 10 in maturity in some places, and 45 in others. You'll be 19 and be as mature as a 28 year old. 60 with the maturity of a 12 year old.
Age is a lie, maturity is a slow process, and everyone should always be growing. The idea that you become 'a mature adult' at a 'certain age' is a paradox, and is not helpful to you when you're young and scared and figuring yourself out before you can figure your LIFE out.
Your art will get better. Your friend group will get bigger. You'll laugh more, write more, reach out to your role models and realize they're all just people like you. Figuring things out. Fucking up. Being scared. We're all a little bit scared. But we all figure things out despite the fear.
So long as you take things at a healthy pace, you'll be okay. You'll feel like 'it's the end of the world' so many times, and you'll get through them. And it's worth it to stick around."
There's never a rush to get your shit together. Most people don't have their life together, or figured out. We're all just kids with back pain and bills. But, y'know. We get to watch the movies we want and eat the food we like, so. It's not so bad. <3
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Wahhhhhh
The tldr is my boss couldn't go to this meeting today so I got sent to represent our archive, and I was the only archivist there in a group of professors and PhD students (whose research is tangentially related to the contents of the archive) and I'm just ahhhh
On the one hand, it was great, sitting around a table talking research for a few hours over lunch, it's all the best parts of grad school seminars and I've missed having those kinds of discussions IMMENSELY and it feels like a missing piece of myself has been returned. Even just from mostly listening for the duration.
On the other hand. The sense of imposter syndrome not being a Real Academic. And the sense of loss and regret. Yes yes I didn't go for my PhD because health, finances, awful job prospects for classicists. But I LOVED grad school. I love my MA and learning and studying and being a student. I miss it terribly, even though I'm good at and enjoy my profession.
Even had health/finances not been a concern, I'd never have been able to decide on a focused research topic for a dissertation. My interests are too broad. They're not even limited to classics. I'm bouncing between life changing academic interests constantly, and each one is foundational and obsessive, in its own way. I joked to Atlas this week that I was supposed to be born a foppish renaissance dilettante, but it's not even really a joke.
I know. I KNOW. My unlived lives aren't real. They shouldn't haunt me. The me that exists is de facto the best version of me because it's the ONLY me that exists. And life doesn't have to be perfect it just has to be Good. And it is good. But also. Why can't I be a full-time student just learning, never having to publish, but also an archivist and information professional, but also a mutual aid volunteer and praxis oriented person, and Also have time for hobbies like crafting and novel reading and video games, and things like cooking and gardening and strength training.
I'm aware that harmonizing and coming to peace with the multitudinous aspects of the self is the work of a lifetime but also I want it to happen /now/
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