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sirenedoug · 2 years

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OFMD Mixtape

Having gone down the rabbit hole that is OFMD brain rot, and being of GenX, my love note to the show, those who created it, and the wonderful Fandom, is in the form of a mixtape. Er, rather, a playlist.

Music has always been a salve and takes my mind away from all the trauma of the world. This list goes from fun and silly to the most angsty, love sick, heart thumping collection representing mainly Stede and Ed’s character development and romance.

I’m going to break them down episode by episode and you can find all the songs linked here:

Please have mercy on me. I am new to the beautiful world of Fandom (ignore my shoebox full of Star Wars bubble gum cards and my Tardis cookie jar…it took a Pandemic and, well, the current state of the world to bring me to this wonderful collection of people in love with a show. I’m just a girl, standing in front of a show, and obsessively thinking about the beauty of it all.) I’m working some shit out, apparently. My rambling gets longer as I get further in the list.

So, with that, please comment suggested songs you find just as angsty and fitting. I've got room for 50 songs on each side of my cassette.

With Love…

Episode 1

We’re going to start, soft and sweet, with “A Pirate’s Life” by Joel Fry.

Yup, part of the soundtrack for the show. This sea shanty by the talented actor who plays Fenchie perfectly captures the innocent (and ignorant) Stede-view of life as a pirate before reality begins to sink in for Stede and for us all.

”The Empty Boat” by Caetano Veloso is also part of the soundtrack and was a perfect way to end the show after Stede experiences death and bumbles through the pirate captain life. It’s too perfect not to add to the list. Soft and sad, “From the east to the west, Oh, the stream is long, Yes, my dream is wrong, From the birth to the death” captures Stede’s birth as a pirate and death of his former self. His journey begins.

Episode 2

”Lola” by The Kinks introduced me to gender identity and sexuality and acceptance. I was fascinated by this song as a kid. There are so many struggles of identity in this episode and the acceptance that love is love is a big part of the beauty of this show. Olu understands his love of Jim, and Lucius discover’s Jim’s secret and discloses his own history of hiding who he really is. Izzy is sent to meet Stede and the stage is set for an epic love story.

Episode 3

"Fantasy" by Mariah Carey may not seem angsty, but it can be. At the beginning of this Episode Stede is beginning to lean into, in a very Stede way, being a pirate. He’s in love with his image of what a pirate captain is, and struts through the Republic of Pirates in his virginal white frock dragging poor Lucius (identified as decidedly non-virginal with a scarlet baptism). I picture Stede tone deaf to his surroundings and singing along with Carey, “Oh, when you walk by every night, Talkin’ sweet and lookin’ fine, I get kinda hectic inside, Mmm, baby I’m so into you, Darlin’, if you only knew, All the things that flow through my mind” as he sings to his inner Gentleman Pirate. But I like to imagine Blackbeard’s fascination with the Stede he has not yet met, having those very same thoughts, about the Gentleman Pirate.

A shout-out to the sample in Carey’s song of Tom Tom Club's "Genius of Love". “With my boyfriend, my laughing boyfriend, There’s no beginning and there is no end, Feels like I’m dreaming, but I’m not sleeping” Nuff said.

Now we get stabby and properly angsty.

Episode 4

Taylor Swift's "Wonderland" (Wow, that cover looks like it came straight from “Pina Coladas” by the gifted faeeebaeee! Read this if you have not. Be warned, however, faeeebaeee invented angst.) Taylor Swift has not, up to this time, been in rotation at my house. I had heard rumors she wrote a bit angsty, but man, that girl is working some shit out. She and Robert Smith need to collaborate. And thank goodness she did, because this song is perfect for both Ed and Stede. As mid-life-crisis-Ed sits by mid-life-crisis-Stede’s sickbed and nurses him with his eyes, and um, gentle touch, and as Stede awakens to meet a man (a pirate even) who appreciates him for who he is, I can hear Wonderland playing, “Flashing lights and we, Took a wrong turn and we, Fell down a rabbit hole, You held on tight to me, ‘Cause nothing’s as it seems, And spinning out of control…We found Wonderland, You and I got lost in it, And we pretended it could last forever”. That’s it. The only song for this episode. It’s got the lighthouse, it’s got the tension with Izzy, it’s got Ed’s plan to kill Stede and assume Stede’s identity. It’s got Ed’s look, as he walks away from Izzy. It’s got Stede’s fantasy coming to full fruition. Ooooooh, the angst.

Episode 5

"Got Weird" by Dodie

Oh Dodie, Dodie, Dodie, how I do love thee. And really, most of her lyrics come straight out of Ed’s brain, I’m convinced. But this song IS the inner dialogue both Ed and Stede have at different points during this episode in order to navigate dinner with the fancy white racist upper crust weirdos. “Table for two, that’s all sorted, I played the man, and you bought it, We’ll talk over glass, like I own it….So take a deep breath, a big stretch, baby, It’ll feel like a movie (maybe)...A pep talk in a bathroom corner, Do I down the gin, stick to water?”

And really, this song would be great after the actual kiss as well…but as Ed clearly wants to kiss Stede at the end of this episode, you can imagine this being the scenario Ed is worried will take place, “I got weird when we made out, What a goddamn kiss to think about…Clearly, I’ve got shit to figure out, Baby, baby, please don’t hate me, Call me up again, I won’t get weird”.

"Rises the Moon" by Liana Flores

Just perfect. Sweet. Sad, cuz we know what we know now that we’ve watched the whole season more times than we are able to admit to ourselves. (btw-I’m not using the royal we here, I’m talking you and me and you and you and you…we know who we are)

“Days fade into a watercolour blur, Memories swim and haunt you, But look into the lake, shimmering like smoke, Rises the moon”

Episode 6

"I Caught Myself" by Paramore I’ve got two songs by Paramore on my mixtape, and this one is for Ed. It represents his struggle with the Kraken, it represents his struggle with his feelings towards Stede and it represents his struggle with his loyalty to Izzy. It opens, “Down to you, You’re pushing and pulling me down to you, But I don’t know what I, Now when I caught myself, I had to stop myself, I’m saying something that I should have never thought…I’m saying something that I should have never thought of you, of you…But I don’t know what I want, No I don’t know what I want, You got it, you got it, Some kind of magic, Hypnotic, hypnotic, You’re leaving me breathless, I hate this, I hate this” and I should just write out the whole damn song. It’s Ed’s struggle with all the relationships in his life.

"Simply the Best" by Billianne I love this version of the song that I’m sure you’ve heard on TikTok. This song is for the bathtub scene. (I realize there have been many “bathtub scenes” over time. Usually they are disturbing, or creepy, or scary, or romantic. This one is just beautiful.) This is Stede’s heart telling Ed he loves him when he breaks through the door and tells him, “I’m your friend”. Course, Stede doesn’t understand it’s love yet. And it’s Ed being completely and brutally honest with Stede, and the way his cheek leans on Stede’s hand…my heart is breaking a little…again.

“I call you when I need you, my heart’s on fire, You come to me, come to me wild and wild, When you come to me, Give me everything I need…Take my heart and make it strong, baby, You’re simply the best, Better than all the rest, Better than anyone, Anyone I’ve ever met, I’m stuck on your heart, I hang on every word you say, Tear us apart, Baby, I would rather be dead”.

Episode 7

"Seven" by Taylor Swift

Yes, I get the hype over Taylor Swift now. What a beautiful song, and for my angsty purposes here, it kills two sets of love birds with one stone so to speak (apologies to Carl).

This song references childhood trauma and we certainly explore Jim’s trauma in their life as a child as well as just having learned about Ed’s dad in the previous episode. Swift sings, “And I’ve been meaning to tell you, I think your house is haunted, Your dad is always mad and that must be why, And I think you should come live with, Me and we can be pirates, Then you won’t have to cry, Or hide in the closet”. How perfect is that?

But the love, too, and this episode ends with love, the near kiss with Olu and Jim, the stuck snake snack scene. “Our love will be passed on”

And there’s one little line in the song that feels like it is foretelling events, “I still got love for you, Pack your dolls and a sweater, We’ll move to India forever…Our love lasts so long.”

"Absolutely Smitten" by Dodie This song captures the joy of the back-and-forth silly banter about Blackbeard’s Bar and Grill and Other Delacacies and Delights and Fishing Equipment scene…it’s got the giddy first love feels all over it.

“She feels her heart begin to swell, Handsome stranger, you have made her insides turn to jelly, She wants to dance around the room, Kiss you until her lips turn blue…She’s absolutely smitten, She’ll never let you go”.

Episode 8

"Hate Myself" by Dodie We are now seriously circling the angsty drain of sadness my friends. So buckle up, more songs to cover the last 3 episodes. This song could be playing in both Stede and Ed’s minds while Calico Jack is wrecking havoc. Ed self-doubting and sabotaging his relationship with Stede. Stede horribly confused by his own feelings towards Ed, towards Jack, and desperate to have his Ed back.

“Could it be different? Did I ruin the day? Oh, do you look angry? Oh, what did I say? Filling in the gaps, something wrong with me, I’m getting desperate, losing my mind…When you go quiet, I hate myself”

"Dreaming With A Broken Heart" by John Mayer Again, a song for both Stede and Ed. Ed has gone off with Jack and I imagine this song has been playing in Stede’s mind all night. He’s put the song on replay all night long and his red-rimmed eyes say he didn’t sleep a wink (I won’t say 17-year-old-me may have put The Cure’s “Kiss Me Kiss Me Kiss Me” album on replay all night after her little heart got broken-she feels you, Stede). Ed, waking up, face in the sand, could have the same song playing.

“When you’re dreaming with a broken heart, The waking up is the hardest part, You roll out of bed and down on your knees, And for a moment, you can hardly breathe, Wondering, ‘Was she really here?, Is she standing in my room?’, No she’s not, ‘Cause she’s gone, gone, gone, gone, gone”

"S.O.S." by ABBA You know what, Stede? You would feel so much better if you just came to my house and we came up with a roller skating routine to this song from a record my mom just got. We can practice in the basement and later, we can put on a show!

“Where are those happy days, They seem so hard to find, I try to reach for you, But you have closed your mind, Whatever happened to our love?, I wish I understood, It used to be so nice, It used to be so good, So when you’re near me, Darling, can’t you hear me, S.O.S., The love you gave me, Nothing can save me, S.O.S., When you’re gone, How can I even try to go on? (oh good lord, every lyric in this song is so perfect…and Rhys Darby learned morse code in the NZ military, so, S.O.S.) When you’re gone, Thought I try, how can I carry on?, You seemed so far away, Though you were standing near, You made me feel alive, But something died, I fear…” Every. Word. Is. Perfect.

"The Chain" by Fleetwood Mac After the first time I watched this episode, I had to replay this scene again and again. It was like watching a perfect music video on MTV’s 120 Minutes circa 1990. And really, the more I watched, the more I was convinced this is really Izzy’s song about Ed. So sad, for Izzy.

“Listen to the wind blow, watch the sun rise, Running in the shadows, damn your love, damn your lies, And if you don’t love me now, You will never love me again, I can still hear you saying, You would never break the chain”

******foot touch****** My heart.

Episode 9

"Sparks" by Coldplay Boy are Ed and Stede in their own heads at the beginning of this episode. Stede is shaken by the news he is “dead” and the old guilt about Mary and the children begins to seep back in. Stede tries to re-kindle the adventure dynamic that made him and Ed so happy, but Ed is floating through the up-ending of his life whilst folding stuff, and that’s OK. Ed has made a huge sacrifice to save Stede and he’s promising, in his own way, to be there for him, no matter what. This melancholy song could, once again, fit both our favorite pirates.

“Did I drive you away?, I know what you’ll say, You say, ‘Oh sing one we know’, But I promise you this, I’ll always look out for you…My heart is yours, It’s you that I hold on to…I know I was wrong, But I won’t let you down…”

"Like Real People Do" by Hozier Oh the kiss. Oh the kiss. Oh the kiss. I understand that Hozier wrote the song imagining a romance from one of the well preserved bog bodies pulled from a peat bog in Ireland and a live human, but Ed and Stede both consider themselves monsters of a sort, so, voila! This is a beautiful song, and the lyrics really do fit the kiss.

“I had a thought, dear, However scary, About that night…I will not ask you where you came from, I will not ask you, neither should you, Honey just put your sweet lips on my lips, We should just kiss like real people do”

"Pink in the Night" by Mitski This is all Ed on the pier, my babies. “Perfect Day” by Lou Reed is beautiful too, but this feels more fitting (also, fun fact, no heroine). He’s given up everything to save Stede and now he’s flayed his heart open for the man and there he sits in the lavender sunset.

“I glow pink in the night in my room, I’ve been blossoming alone over you, And I hear my heart breaking tonight, I hear my heart breaking tonight…I love you, I love you, I love you…and I know I’ve kissed you before, but I didn’t do it right, Can I try again, and again, and again…”

"Two Birds" by Regina Spektor

“Two birds on a wire, One tries to fly away, And the other watches him close from that wire, He says he wants to as well, But he is a liar”

Poor Ed. Poor Stede. Screw you Chauncey.

Episode 10

"Stop This Train" by John Mayer Can’t listen too carefully to this one, but the sentiment is spot on. Stede, middle aged and caught between his family and his *still can’t quite understand he is in love* Ed, thrown back into his old mindset by the bullying of Chauncey and Chauncey’s subsequent violent death, flees home. Life is moving too quickly for him and he returns home, thinking there will be a solution. Well, there is, I suppose. But the consequences…oh, Ed.

“No, I’m not colorblind, I know the world is black and white, I try to keep an open mind, But I just can’t sleep on this tonight, Stop this train, I want to get off and go home again, I can’t take the speed it’s moving in, I know I can’t, But honestly, won’t someone stop this train?”

Meanwhile, consequences…

To quote Buttons, the next songs are just going to be pure tone…

ED:

"Shallows" by Daughter

“Let the water rise, Let the ground crack, Let me fall inside, Lying on my back, Lying on my back, Dry your smoke-stung eyes, So you can see the light, Staring at the sky, Watching Stars collide, Watching stars, If you leave, When I go, Find me, In the shallows”

"Where Is My Mind" covered by Maxence Cyrin- instrumental only

"Where Is My Mind?" by the Pixies

“Where is my mind? Where is my mind? Where is my mind? Way out in the water, See it swimming, I was swimming in the Caribbean…Bump into me, swear he’s, Tryin’ a talk to me, say wait, wait…”

"Avalanche" by Leonard Cohen

“You who wish to conquer pain, You must learn what makes me kind, The crumbs of love that you offer me, They’re the crumbs I’ve left behind, Your pain is no credential here, It’s just the shadow, shadow of my wound, I have begun to long for you, I who have no greed, I have begun to ask for you, I who have no need, You say you’ve gone away from me, But I can feel you when you breathe”

"Monster" by Dodie

“Tell me again, About how it hurts, Being awfully loud, For an introvert, Get out of my room, Smile wiped clean, Isn’t it weird, To be so mean?, I’m guessing that I’ve grown horns, I guess I’m human no more, Oh, how easily passion twists, You think I’m a crazy bitch, I craft my words to fit your head, ‘Cause no one listens to the dead, So maybe I will talk to you, The only way I know how to, I’ve said my speech, Through sharpened teeth, You break the rules and spikes grow from your skin, Please, let the devil in”

STEDE:

"Strange" by Celeste

“Say isn’t it strange? Isn’t it strange? I am still me, You are still you, In the same place, Isn’t it strange, How people can change, From strangers to friends, Friends into lovers, And strangers again?”

"The Night We Met" by Lord Huron

“I am not the only traveler, Who has not repaid his debt, I’ve been searching for a trail to follow again, Take me back to the night we met, And then I can tell myself, What the hell I’m supposed to do, And then I can tell myself, Not to ride along with you, I had all and then most of you, Some and now none of you, Take me back to the night we met, I don’t know what I’m supposed to do, Haunted by the ghost of you, Oh, take me back to the night we met”

"All I Wanted" by Paramore

“Think of me when you’re out, when you’re out there, I’ll beg you nice from my knees…All I wanted was you, All I wanted was you, I think I’ll pace my apartment a few times, And fall asleep on the couch, Wake up early to black and white re-runs, That escaped from my mouth, All I wanted was you…I could follow you to the beginning, And just to relive the start, And maybe then we’ll remember to slow down, At all of our favorite parts, All I wanted was you”

"Ready Now" by Dodie

“You saw through me, All this time, I’d forgotten, People are kind, I was hurting, And you knew, So you showed me, What to do, You said, ‘I will listen, Tell it all, When you’re finished, We’ll talk more’, But I didn’t know how, So we took it in turns, And to my surprise, We found my words, Feet firm on the ground, We stood hand in hand, The world seemed to tell me, That I have a plan, Together, we sang, ‘I’m ready, now’”

I’m hoping that last song by Dodie ends up on my next mixtape for Ed…

And the last song leaves us all dangling over the side of the Revenge, preferably offering Lucius a hand up and into a secret compartment while Stede finds his footing on the water and Ed watches Frenchie hoist his new flag…

"Miles From Nowhere" by Yusuf/Cat Stevens

“Miles from nowhere, Guess I’ll take my time, Oh yeah, to reach there, Look up at the mountain, I have to climb, Oh yeah, to reach there…I creep through the valleys, And I grope through the woods, ‘Cause I know when I find it, my honey, It’s gonna make me feel good, I love everything, So don’t it make you feel sad, ‘Cause I’ll drink to you, my baby, I’ll think to that, yes, I’ll think to that”

#our flag means death #ofmd #edward teach #stede bonnet #our flag meets death #our flag means love #my playlist #music recommendation #spotify #Gen x

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