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trans-tyrell-wellick · 3 years

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eps3.2legacy.so from the eyes of an autistic person

Overall this episode was interesting, but I'm not going to be talking about the episode as a whole. It's been a while since I first watched the episode at this point or even rewatched it for that matter but I've been wanting to make this post for a little while now. And bear with me, I've never done a post like this and I tend to ramble a lot. I'm also not that great at times with articulating my thoughts so I apologise ahead of time if this feels disorganized or jumbled and doesn't make sense.

The scene in particular I wanna talk about is the interrogation scene with Tyrell and Mr. Williams. And holy shit was it stressful. I know it was supposed to be considering the circumstances but to someone with sensory issues and anxiety... That was literal pain for me. Especially the constant noises from the kettle getting constantly louder and louder to add intensity to the scene. That was pure hell. Another thing that got me was Mr. Williams' constant "don't look away, look at me" comments.

And he does it a total of three times but it was enough for even me to be absolutely done with this guy. I know it was his job and he did it incredibly well because he got what he wanted but still. Coming from a household where I am often times scolded for not making eye contact with people when they're talking to me was so uncomfortable to the point where I couldn't even look at this guy's face anymore. Now like I said earlier, did a good job and he accomplished what he was there for. But from an autistic viewpoint, it was horrible. Which brings me to my next point in this post.

Autistic Tyrell Wellick.

At this point it's probably no secret that I headcanon Tyrell as autistic whether it's projecting purposes or not. In this scene he repetitively shows signs of distress and several times repeats "this is enough".

I know it was meant more along the lines of Tyrell not wanting to admit the truth but that scene always seems to resonate with me on how I feel when I'm getting overstimulated. I don't wanna talk and no matter how many times the statement or question is repeated it will only make how I feel worse.

I probably would've let this scene slide if it weren't for the fact that he also shows signs of pain without physically being hurt. He constantly gives pained expressions, looks away, even slams his hands on the table at one point, and keeps telling Mr. Williams that it's enough. This is usually how my sensory issues show through when they're bugging me a bit too much in certain moments.

To see a character have issues like this other than Elliot surprised me. Way before I got into the fandom I had heard about how Elliot acted and I would be a liar if I said I didn't originally start watching it because I was desperate for autistic coded characters, even if they weren't canonically autistic. Elliot was gonna be that rep for me and he still is.

But then I saw Tyrell doing a lot of the same things I do whether it was in 3x03 or in other episodes. I related to Tyrell in certain aspects just as much as I did Elliot. Autism is a spectrum and in the case of these two they are definitely different and fit into this. Often times I'm a lot like Elliot when I can't or don't want to mask but more often than not I'm overlooked because of how much I mask. I see that aspect of myself in Tyrell.

I'm starting to get a little off topic but I want to address that I had that headcanon before I got to season 3 but that episode solidified my headcanon. But to attempt and circle back to my main point I'd like to say that I feel Tyrell exhibits a lot of autistic traits but he often gets overlooked because he seemingly can "function well" in most social situations. And to have 3x03 to include such an intense scene like that was definitely painful but it means a lot. I know it sounds stupid, but it does in its own odd way.

In no way am I saying Tyrell is canonically autistic nor am I saying you should headcanon this, I just wanted to share my take on him. In a world where society seems to think you're a burden for being any kind of different, I think it's good that people like me find solace in characters they can relate to.

This has been stuck in my head ever since I first thought of it and the only way to positively help was to slap it into a Tumblr post and hope it made sense. And if you made it this far, thank you so much for putting up with my bullshit 😂

#autism hc #actuallyautistic #my gif #mr robot #tyrell wellick #autistic tyrell wellick #eps3.2legacy.so #mr robot 3x03 #ableism mention

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