One day I'm gonna go through and list all the times van stands up to/pushes back against tai because it's so important to me. Tai: don't encourage her, van: looks right at tai before repeating themselves in 1x06 and the don't do that in 1x10 and the "no one is saying she is" is idr exactly what ep but early s2 and van being the one to go and pick up the birds after lottie said to first and just ahhhh

something that is so compelling to me about ta/ivan is that...they actually aren't compatible. they are not good for each other. and like, they could probably both use some of what the other gives, but they aren't able to do that because of the circumstances. tai needs van's humor and their more easy going nature. and van sometimes needs tai's no-nonsense and straight to the point, practical thought patterns + the belief that something Can be done ( though they are entirely capable of being pragmatic and addressing the situation with that, it differs from the way tai does).

but they fundamentally have different mechanisms of coping, processing, managing conflict, etc. and these things are irreconcilable. and eventually, they would have realized that these things were true and gone their separate ways because they just could not sustain a relationship when their worldviews were so different and the conflict led to losses in autonomy on both ends. but because of the wilderness, their relationship is not just that but a means of survival.

their relationship becomes so entrenched in survival and love and peace and care that they are unable to move on from each other until they are outside of that circumstance (or at least are able to convince themselves that they are no longer in that state of survival). instead, they cling harder. instead of adapting or addressing these fundamental differences at their core, they just keep going.

Rip crystal/kristen I'm sorry that Van and mari only care about finding shauna tai.

Van who has seen tai in the last 20 years: ...Tai?

Nat who hasn't seen lottie since they were rescued: lottie.

I don't think van would have done what travis did. If tai was chosen, then that is what the wilderness chose. That was the answer. The more compelling question to me is what would shauna have done?