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#do it scared do it weird do it alone!
blujayonthewing · 8 days
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pitched battle inside my brain between the part of me that's desperately shaking myself by the shoulders going "YOU HAVE GOT TO ACTUALLY LIVE THE KIND OF LIFE YOU IMAGINE INSTEAD OF JUST SITTING AROUND IMAGINING IT UNTIL YOU DIE!!" and the part of me that's clutching my face going "is this allowed? is this allowed?? is this allowed???"
#trying to plan a solo cicada pilgrimage and getting brainworms about it yeehaw#'making a lot of plans and never actually doing things in real life' has been a problem for literally as long as I can remember#but I also feel like I've developed a learned helplessness over the last several years that's gotten worse as I've gotten older??#me age twenty: I think I'm gonna take myself to chicago next week because I feel like going to the zoo#me age thirty: am I allowed to go camping alone. am I allowed to do a solo road trip. I need a grownup#to be extremely clear I am very much allowed and this is not justin's fault and I don't know where it comes from#like I'll run things by him lowkey seeking 'permission' that I don't even need and he'll be like 'yeah that sounds good to me'#and then I STILL won't do the thing because like. my brain keeps insisting there needs to be a grownup in charge?? HELLO I'M GROWNUP#anyway I'm doing cicada trip solo BECAUSE-- the drive is so long I want to do five days because two of them will just be driving#and he can't get that much time off work right now#AND because I literally only want to Be Camping and Looking At Bugs but he'd get bored of a week of that he likes Activities#me this morning getting insecure and weird: what are your thoughts... on cicada voyage....#him after at first not even understanding the question: I'm SO excited for you?? you deserve to get to go absolutely feral???#I do.... ;n; 💕 why am I so scared to be a person.......#about me#cicada journey
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drinktobones · 5 months
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lesbianyosano · 6 months
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what thinking about this post does to a mf
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invisibleoctopus · 5 months
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the triforce of Doing The Thing
triforce of courage: do it scared
triforce of wisdom: do it weird
triforce of power: do it alone
triforce of shadow (the empty middle part): do it badly
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true-bluesargent · 6 months
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guys i am at the cinema by myself for the first time ever. do it alone do it scared do it weird etc.
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chuckyray · 2 months
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aint no way i just opened up the twf tag and some freak is talking about hoping a 9yo girl and her 11yo brother are kissing each other in the dimension they're trapped in after dying in a horrific drunk driving accident. these kids have zero incestous subtext and zero prior trauma to their deaths that would indicate any abnormal sibling feelings. they're young children whose entire plot purpose is how they died in a tragic accident.
some of you people need to get your shit curbstomped and im happy to do it for you
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tj-crochets · 1 year
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Hey y’all! Slightly weird request, but can you please give me any “living around coyotes” advice you have?  My mom’s backyard has no fence and backs onto a huge open field which goes up to foothills, which are also unoccupied by humans. She’s been trying to grow vegetables this year, which means she has a lot of ground squirrels in her yard (eating the vegetables), which seems to be attracting coyotes? They’ve been getting closer and closer and today she sent me a picture of a coyote what appears to be less than 100 feet from her door. The problem is my mom likes to take long walks in that big field and the coyotes keep getting closer to her on those walks. I know they make coyote-safety vests for dogs but idk the human equivalent? It’s not like one or two coyotes, it’s a bunch of them. I think she said the most she’s seen at a time is seven. 
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shadow-the-crow · 1 month
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God my parents and sister just left for a 4 day holiday and i already feel the Lonely creeping in 0.0
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crumbleclub · 10 months
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Something I think would destroy Michael when he finally got out of William's house:
At every turn, the adults who were supposed to care for him failed him. Now that he's an adult, nobody is expected to help him at all.
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soldier-poet-king · 6 months
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If no one's got me at least I know getting more tattoos that everyone around me hates has got me
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bugmistake · 4 months
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one of my new years resolutions is to do something that scares me at LEAST once a week and apparently there's a lot of events that scare me at my local public library (he has an anxiety disorder he is trying to lessen the severity of)
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daisywords · 4 months
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stupid-dyke · 2 months
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I can tell i am now experienceing actual real sleep deprivation and not just the omnipresent idiopathic hypersomnia fake sleepiness that my stupid lying body never shuts up about. I can tell because I am fallijng asleep in class regardless if I take my medication and I feel like everything is so, incredibly stupid and horrible, and everyone giving me homework or telling me to do anything is attacking me. And I can;t hold a conversation. And people are noticing my strange manner and pointing out that I seem wrong. And yet here we are AGAIN I have AGAIN stayed up late AND not gotten any work done. And on top of that I broke my fucking glasses tonight because I left them sitting on my fucking bed. And I'm freaking my parents out by crying over the phone and also I think I actually injured my shoulder last week its been hurting for four days now. and I'm so sad and mad at myself for not sleeping and not working but I can't work because I havent slept and I cant sleep because I havent worked. And every single time I get in a bad time like this my dad worries im going to die because i was suicidal for like a week in 2019 and then he gets mad at me for worrying him and I feel so so so guilty. Im so so sad.
#and I dont want to fuckign sleep even though i really need to and I spend every fucking seconf of every fucking day being sleepy#because even when I get enough sleep im still FUCKING sleepy so what is the FUCKING point. Why not just NOT FUCKING SLEEP.#Im so fucking sick of myself and my body and my pain and my stupidity.#AND ITS SO STUPID BECAUSE HERE I AM MISSING ALL MY ASSIGNMENTS SCARING MY FAMILY WEIRDING OUT OTHER STUDENTS AND MAKING MY PROFS HATE ME#BECAUSE IM FUCKING SLEEPY. stupidest fucking sounding reason on earth to have a fucking crisis.#no one ever hears me say im sleepy and thinks oh thats really serious i really want to help you now its literally just annoying to ppl#haha wait til you have kids or get older or a full time job ha ha#cool I am fuckign terrified of the future because I know how mad everyone gets at me when im too disabled to do what im supposed to#and I know its going to get to a point where I can't and there will probably be no one left to help me. I'm almost certainly going to outli#outlive my parents and my sister and even if i ever get married ill probably also get divorced so I'll be all alone#friendships aren't safe becuase you can love someone so much for 5 years and she just tells you one day she doesn't want to be burdened#by you anymore and you never hear from her again#its a dark scary fucking world and you want me to be passionate about a field of study or something?? jesus christ can you all just fuck of#I dont want to go to grad school i dont want to work i dont want to live alone i dont want to live with my parents forever#my head hurts so much goodnight guys sorry for ranting its literally fine im literally just really sleepy sorry for being melodramatic
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daz4i · 9 months
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uh oh i think my laptop's officially dead
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boyswanna-be-her · 11 months
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I also asked a priest in the abortion clinic parking lot straight up today if he felt like a big man for scaring women. I can't even recognize the weaponized asshole that I've become but once I stopped censoring myself, it just bubbles out of me.
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ittybittybeastiebuddy · 4 months
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Staring into space wide eyed while an overlay of the birth of the universe plays
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