#cringing at posting my own excerpts but. I wrote this bit as a standalone ficlet before I absorbed it into dnc so I'm giving myself a pass | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

givehimthemedicine · 1 year

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There was a place where I used to have to stay. When I was bad.

The little room that was all cold floor. Where I would be alone in the dark for so long that I would miss people. Even though people were bad.

I would sit in the corner and try to think what a soft place would be like. I would lean my head on the wall and.. if I stayed in the same place, the tile would get warm there.

And to sleep I would try to pretend the warm place was... somebody. Like there was such a thing as somebody who would be nice to me.

I thought about that when I got in your bed that night. And you made me comfortable. And you read to me.

And I put my head on you.. and you were warm and soft and nice to me. And I was not alone.

(excerpt from do not cry because I know not everyone reads elmax fic but the sleepover scene torments me and I want to make sure you all suffer too)

#eleven #elmax #I've never cried at any st deaths #but I have cried thinking about how it must have felt to el to fall asleep with her head on max's shoulder #it's this casual little move that max doesn't seem to think anything of. and why would she? el does it like she's done it 100 times before #but I can only barely begin to imagine what it means to el after growing up so starved of human contact and warmth and affection #even though this is an adorable elmax moment I kinda hate when I see it boiled down to something shippy #this isn't romance it's just el feeling human and warm and loved #fic #lab feels #mine #gifs #do not cry #cringing at posting my own excerpts but. I wrote this bit as a standalone ficlet before I absorbed it into dnc so I'm giving myself a pass #angst

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