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p0rchc0ll4ps3 · 3 months

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kim............. just some headcanons for how i characterize him. i might be missing somethings. i might add to this. this is very disorganized but it's fine

He wears cologne

He was raised by a Dolores dei church orphanage, hence why he’s very slightly religious (he prays. Occasionally. And he’s respectful in churches)

He’s very attached to his car, refers to it in his head with she/her and sees it as a motherly figure

Eyes didn’t die immediately. Instead Kim had to watch over him and take care of him, just like with harry, but eyes died in his sleep

Kim has a serious amount of self-loathing and is REALLY critical of himself due to shit when he was a kid and the shit he got working juvie

As such he really likes how harry much worships him

He likes to listen to insulindian classical music like operas and symphonies because as a kid the church orphaning him tried to indoctrinate him and erase his culture. He didn’t even have any culture, and all they ended up doing was making him love the country. This is also why he knows so much history

He also listens to it as a big fuck you to the fascists bc it’s fascist music (bc it’s really national, like the music of the country) and the fascists would hate to know someone who looks like him listens to their music

As a kid, the orphanage referred to him by last name, so he refers to himself by his last name in his head because it’s a way of being formal with himself and keeping up his image (also kinda’ says he is his own father figure, since the closest thing to a father figure he had was the dolorian priest that ran the orphanage, and he referred to all the kids by their last names)

The only person who ever referred to kim by his first name was eyes who was the only other person who really saw Kim for who he was

Kim used to be a really pissed off kid, and he used to respond to injustice with rage, but it kept getting him into trouble. Eyes had to teach him how to calm down and deal with the shit, and he was the only person who was kind to Kim

Kim reflects a lot of what eyes taught him in his own interactions with people; it’s why he gives people the benefit of doubt, and it’s why he’s so kind to harry. It’s kinda’ like eyes passed the mentorship down to Kim and now Kim’s teaching harry

Kim genuinely tries to be kind with people because he doesn’t want anyone to have to deal with the shit he’s dealt with

He doesn’t like to ask for help though. Has a real hard time with that because that shows vulnerability

Kim has a little picture of eyes in his wallet and he talks to him and updates him when he misses him. He will never get over his death. He will tear himself apart about it forever. He seriously still blames himself for eyes’s death, even though he did all he could, and he’s spent many nights replaying it over in his head to see how he could’ve done it better

Kim’s buried the “Kim” in him so deep, he’s started to be closed off even when he’s alone, always putting on a false face, pretending he’s much more put together and professional than he is internally. The only time he really lets loose is when he’s in the kineema alone, and sometimes in his room in the dark

Harry calls him Kim so much, Kim starts to love himself again Otherwise he’s just trying to ignore the past, trying to fix the past, or trying to keep himself together. He’s afraid if he relaxes even once, he’ll slip up

He has some kinda’ general anxiety disorder, very well stifled, but it comes up when harry does anything stupid or late at night after a long day when he worries if he said the wrong thing earlier. He’s always trying to make sure things r going smoothly, and he deals with mistakes really badly (internally. On the outside he’s professional as hell about them)

He’s very hard on himself and thinks really lowly of himself

He thinks he’s never been anyone’s favorite person (even if there was eyes, he thought eyes was too cool for him, and that Kim could never be as cool as him (though eyes wanted to tell him how much he meant to him, but he couldn’t because he DIED))

He’s kinda’ silly. He has a lot of interests he’s picked up from the kids he’s worked with such as really harsh electronic music and wirral, among others (though he likes the electronic music bc it makes him feel like shit)

He’s really nerdy / geeky. Likes machines, cars, has a very specific obsession with aerostatics. He has so many books he’s read over and over. He just thinks they’re really cool. Something always fascinated him about flight. Maybe because it’s so freeing

I think his cosplay is literally something he just does for fun because he can get away with it. It makes him feel cool. He’s always in the pursuit of being cool

He likes games he can micromanage where there’s a lot of moving parts he has to strategize really deeply. It gives him a challenge and it’s also a sense of control

He’s always taking notes. He’s gone through so many notebooks. He’s afraid if he doesn’t write things down, he’ll miss something important that’ll get someone killed, but also it’s a way to pay attention to what someone’s saying without having to look at them (meaning he doesn’t have to act a certain way. It gives him a break)

He writes his notes in shorthand. Harry can read them, just like harry knows French (innate things he never forgot)

He’s got a lot of rage in him that he’s gotten really good at controlling, but it comes back out when anyone’s racist towards him or thinks less of him, though he tries really hard to keep it down

He’s scared to open up because it’s gotten him really hurt before.

He’s got wall after wall built up around his soul

He has a little box he tries to stay in where it’s safe, and when things challenge that, or when things try to pull him out of the box, he insists on staying in the box because he’s scared of leaving it because things outside the box are no longer under his control

Harry’s slowly loosening him up and Kim’s learning how to let go a little more bc harry keeps challenging him and pulling him out of that box (like with the cryptids. Kim’s like that shit’s not real shut up I don’t want my reality challenged with even the Consideration that there are things beyond my control. And harry’s like well Kim the nature of the universe is that everything is out of your control and either you succumb to it and ride it or you die. Also cryptids Are real and I’m gonna find them and you’re coming with me. And then they DO find them. And it’s so freeing for Kim to let go and let things happen to him and to like. Actually experience the world without the fear that he starts to let himself be a lot more open to it all. (Plus he trusts that if harry’s there, it’ll all be ok. That if something gets fucked, they can work through it together. He’s never had anyone else to work through shit with. He finally doesn’t have to do everything alone.))

The pale freaks him out bc it’s the ultimate unknown. He doesn’t like thinking about it, he doesn’t like talking about it, he just pretends it doesn’t exist / doesn’t dwell on it

Also after eyes dies, he has no one to back him up and support him anymore, so he really toughens up and hardens and gets his Cool Exterior after that. It’s big protection thing, and also in the very beginning he tries to manifest and become eyes bc he has no fucking clue how to deal with losing him other than becoming him. He’s slowly dropped off that, but he still tries to be cool and put together and professional. Its bc of the racism he has to be tough and bc he was working juvie he always couldn’t act his age even though he was an adult (and he really doesn’t want to be seen as a child anymore. He wants to be Trusted to handle things like an adult). He was also scared the grief was getting to him and he was scared of how much control he was losing

WAIT I FORGOT HE'S GAY THAT'S ANOTHER REASON WHY HE TRIES TO BE PROFESSIONAL ok thank you that's all. for now

#c4rg0f1l3s #my writing #disco elysium #disco elysium spoilers #kim kitsuragi #harry du bois #kimharry #idk feel free to add i may or may not adopt them into my lexicon #ive seen posts also i took some things from those like the music one (his liking bad music)#but most of this is mine #ummm. grasps him. yeah that's all #marfă din elysium

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k1ll3r-k4rg0 · 1 year

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the gay little hobbits are in my brain again

#jesus fuck... the hobbits.... ough. the gobbits. ouwouwaough #ouwouagh.... .uf......#lotr #c4rg0f1l3s

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1n-th3-gr34t-b3l0w · 2 years

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Hi Dylan here. This is an OC blog for k1ll3r-k4rg0 for all my guys to post whatever fuckall random thoughts they have!

18+ BLOG! NO MINORS. No age in bio? You will be blocked.

All OCs are 18+ and may post all matter of R rated material so.

May be some random reblogs as well if anyone in my brain thinks oh this would be good to share. Also tags will be in character unless otherwise stated 😳

ALSO! Asks ARE open feel free to send them!! Make sure you specify WHO you are asking

My guys will answer accordingly (tho since it's like. An internet type space. There'll probably be no sprites.)

SELECT HERE (wip of course)

Tags:

character.rtf = ic musings

character.rbg = ic reblogs

c4rg0f1l3s / ooc = mun thoughts

Pfp by @castle-doctrine

#ooc #c4rg0f1l3s #welcome at! gonna try this shit out but knowing me it won't really have much on it #maybe it would be better to have seperate blogs for mains but.... I have. a lot of mains

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p0rchc0ll4ps3 · 1 month

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I enjoy how everyone's version of revachol is based off places they've been / are familiar with. Because place is so important to disco elysium, it really pulls descriptors out of people that are evocative of their native soil and I think that's dope af. Subtle things to pick up on if a fic is American or not bc the game is so descriptive of specifics it makes fic writers descriptive of specifics as well. There's also just a lot of places Talked about that are never Described, so one has to describe and worldbuild if they want to write the story, and as a result, people draw from their experiences. I think it's really neat. Honestly my favorite part about reading fic is seeing everyone's different interpretations of character and place, getting a glimpse into other cultures, and in a way also seeing different places and cities come through in the writing. You draw from experience! You write Revachol as the places you are most connected to because Revachol has a pull on Harry. So you evoke it in your writing by manifesting the places that have a pull on you

And also like it's based enough in some kind of reality. Like it's not fantasy necessarily, so you bring what you have from real life into it

#c4rg0f1l3s #I love this shit so so so much #been having a lot of fun I'm ngl #disco elysium

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p0rchc0ll4ps3 · 1 month

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My "Jean has a cockatoo bc he can't have a meaningful personal connection without it being a lot of work that he stresses over" propaganda

And the "Jean looks for Harry in everything" propaganda as well

He reads his case files out loud to her if he takes them home, has taught her Many swear words (and a lot of French), and she knows how to sing a few of his sad girly pop songs he likes to listen to

Text reads:

Huge responsibility

Named after an ex

Bought her in a fit of drunken desperation

Jean: Cléa doesn't like anyone, it's not fucking personal.

#doodles #putting it here coz it's not necessarily art for my art blog just a doodle #c4rg0f1l3s #my art #disco elysium #jean vicquemare #jv #de #lot more sketches where this came from but I haven't posted any #marfă din elysium

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p0rchc0ll4ps3 · 21 days

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I think about modern au sometimes. But not even modern, more like y2k 2002 Europe au

Anyways regardless of the time period I have thoughts about cars. Coz I think someone's car is just SO indicative of personality. Unfortunately, I'm not sure about Judit (it's probably just a car:tm:?) but for the men I have

This type of shit for Harry. Car that's way too small for him, second hand cheap, still going despite all the shit he's put it through. Whatever time period this au takes place in, Harry's car is at LEAST twenty years old (not vintage though. it's just old enough to be uncool). It's an absolute trash pile on the inside. It's got carpeted interiors, and it has that dirty car smell (kinda' smells like dirty dog and dirt). there is some kind of sickly sweet bubblegum car air freshener in there. He cannot keep it clean for the life of him. The speakers rattle. It only uses CDs if it's modern 2020s age. He drives erratically, like he's driving according to a set of Harry-road-rules, and always knows exactly what to get away with and when. He's a boss at finding parking. He knows every single place in the city to park, and he knows how to work the payed spots to not pay, etc. He's obsessed with it and if anyone tries to get him a different one he gets so upset about it. He tends to forget to take it in to get checked and then gets worked up about it, so recently he sets alarms to remember that haha. the car is kinda' as fucked as harry is, but it keeps trucking and keeps trying, just like harry

this pic is of Saul's car from Better Call Saul / Breaking Bad

Jean has a black secondhand Audi s8 (he does Not have the salary for it to be anything but secondhand). Basically he has an imposing, government looking vehicle. If he was in the USA and not in small tiny European streets and ex-bomb shelter parking garages a la Germany, he'd have an SUV. As is, this is still a horrendously large vehicle, and he often parks it in the worst places possible. He prefers to park on the sidewalk, for example. No parking space? No problem. He makes it work. He tries to keep the car clean to maintain his professional exterior but it's kinda dirty on the inside anyways. Crumbs and trash and the like. Sticky. It's leather on the inside at least. He cleans it if he knows someone's going to ride with him but sometimes it kinda falls apart. So it's like it has this veneer of luxury but then if you look closer it's not. Smells like cigarette smoke and cologne-adjacent car air freshener. He drives aggressively as fuck, always switching lanes, following the ambulance to get past traffic, speeding up when he sees a yellow light, barely stopping at stop signs, etc. He also gets horrendous road rage. The vehicle has a few scrapes. He takes care of it, though. Makes sure it gets all its visits to the car vet and is surprisingly knowledgeable about its issues

2002 and 2020 versions respectively

Kim's car is immaculate. He drives a Volkswagen GTI R, like top of the line European sports car right here. He likes color, so he'll allow himself to drive a red car. I drive this car (it's my parents car), and the handling is super tight and super responsive and it's a beast on the road. Like you really feel strapped into a Machine and you trust it to hell and back. As German cars go, it's hard to upkeep it without taking it into the shop, and it might require some special care. I just think Kim would have a very sports car, but not a typical one, and not at all modified (except for the speakers. He gets the car with the speakers that have a subwoofer in the back). He saved up for this. He keeps his car super clean, it's got leather interiors, and he is Super strict about it. You can't eat or drink anything but water there. No smoking. Don't touch the windows or I'll make you clean them, etc. No car air freshener. He polishes this thing. He also does work on it himself instead of taking it to the mechanic. It's a Really Healthy Car. He also talks to it. He drives faster than speedlimit sometimes. Like he'll drive really well, according to road laws, but sometimes he'll take risks. He plays the 'i'm a cop' card if he gets caught

2002 and 2019 respectively

#c4rg0f1l3s #today in fandom i bring you... car thoughts. bc of my car obsessions #tomorrow? who knows....#disco elysium #harry du bois #jean vicquemare #kim kitsuragi #marfă din elysium #posted this in class whaoups #apologies for being eurobiased. i cant see them being from anywhere but europe if its modern au

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p0rchc0ll4ps3 · 1 month

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GOD I HAVE SO MANY OPINIONS ABOUT DISCO ELYSIUM ANIMALS FUCK

Just some NOTEBOOK DOODLES and design thoughts. Most of these designs are from @buckybearart !!! (Kim and Harry but not Jean or eyes) Saw his versions of them as toony animals and lost my goddamned mind. I really like these

Kim is kitties (panther or jaguar or leopard, leaning towards jaguar (melanistic tho)), Harry is big brown bear, Jean is black STOAT, eyes (last page) is either tiger or Russian laika dog mutt (light brown), leaning towards mutt for him since in my hcs he's half graadian half insulindean

#c4rg0f1l3s #disco elysium #kim kitsuragi #harry du bois #jean vicquemare #eyes disco elysium #viorel segal #doodles #my art #disco beasts #marfă din elysium

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p0rchc0ll4ps3 · 24 days

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In my hcs Jean has three tattoos:

One of his ex girlfriend's name on his left shoulder. It's just a standard tattoo:tm:, a basic heart with an arrow through it, a ribbon with her name (cléa) wrapped around it, and red anemone flowers behind it (symbolic! They mean forsaken love, and there's a myth where they symbolize the bloody death of the Greek mortal Adonis. He was gored by a boar and died in aphrodites arms and her tears and his blood made the flower. They r also a European flower. Jean chose them coz cléa liked them the best out of the options they had LOL.). This is the only one he has in color. He got it for Cléa coz he thought he was gonna marry her and he let her pick it. They broke up a year later

Another is of his horse Fidèle, named after Frissel the First's horse. It's just the head of the black stallion with the white blaze down his nose, horseshoe with his name on it around him. Pointed up for luck of course. I think it's on jeans right side over the ribs (something about lungs and love and give me your stamina and strength to keep going) but I'm not sure. Wherever he put it, he put it subconsciously, and I feel like if it's on his side, he can always touch the horse when he puts his hands on his hips or something. This is the first one he got, and he got it on impulse one day when he felt like he was losing himself and needed something, anything, to keep him grounded

Then there's the hawk on his back between his shoulder blades. Top view, wings bent in flight so that they kinda look like /|/\|\, halo around its head. I feel it's a very geometric, mostly shapes, not as detailed tattoo. Harry has a matching one on his back of a heron, top view, wings stretched out like —|—, halo around its head (Harry has since forgotten it was there and he'll get jumpscared by it sometime in the future (coz when do you have a chance to look at your own back), or Kim will ask him about it). Anyways it's supposed to represent 'im always watching your back. I've got your back, you've got mine.' It's also unintentionally where the RCM patch on the uniform is, binding them not only in brotherhood as friends but as partners. Maybe when Harry got the idea to get them he knew. Jean and Harry got them together after a particularly harrowing case they both narrowly survived bc of the other, if the partner hadn't been there, they'd have died (maybe one of Harry's three kills), after which they'd gotten blackout drunk together to cope. This was sometime after two years of partnership, before it all went to shit

Also: These are all hidden. You can't regularly see them when he's in uniform

#that is all #c4rg0f1l3s #disco elysium #jean vicquemare #I am putting thas in the tag bc I be thinking about it #I be drawing him and I be thinking about it #de #marfă din elysium

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p0rchc0ll4ps3 · 28 days

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JEAN THOUGHTS (LONG) (3K WORDS LONG) (PUTTING HALF OF IT UNDER A CUT) this is an extremely unstructured jeanessay really. a lot of thoughts i just piled in that have been in my brain that i wanted to get down.

THIS IS ALL LIKE. me coming up with shit btw. like. i try to keep things game canon and i shift stuff when i find out about it. but i am not immune to coming up with backstories and issues and personalities for these characters HELP

cw for mentions of drug and alcohol abuse, toxic partnerships, suicide attempts and suicidal ideation. also obviously this talks about fictional cops so

He and harry had worked on a few cases before harry’s encountered him

Jean’s old partner was a junior officer who graduated and went to work in searchlight (not jean’s receipt cop shit. Jean was happy to be on his horse and patrol the streets and hand out fines), and harry snatched jean up right after that. jean's good with teens i think. he sometimes looks after minot's kids (who are 14 and 16 respectively in my hcs)

Harry’s a guy who’s always drunk to avoid his problems. He used to go out drinking a lot with his friends when he was a teen (the 15th indotribe). Slowly all of them have died off, gone to prison, gotten shot, killed by the gang, suicide, drug overdose. Harry’s the only one left

He and his old cop partner used to get drunk and bitch at each other a lot. The old partner couldn’t handle harry’s depression. They were a negative feedback loop, feeding off each other’s negativity, seriously dragging each other down

Harry blew off the old cop when dora left bc harry was sick of the old cop’s bitterness and hopelessness and despair (but at the same time, said old cop had no patience for harry’s bitterness and hopelessness and despair)

So now harry’s been scanning for a new partner, just subconsciously because he thinks he’s fine to go it alone but I think something happens, like he almost gets killed or whatever and Pryce is like you’re a REALLY good cop. Get a partner or I’ll assign one to you. Can’t lose you

And then there’s jean. Who’s just lost his junior officer to searchlight. Who’s depressed but okay for now (he has a really “supportive” girlfriend (or so he thinks))

Harry grabs him. For the first year shit’s great. They mutually benefit each other. Jean pulls harry up, harry teaches jean how to be a really good cop (coz jean goes from patrol officer or sergeant to lieutenant; he’s SUPER unprepared for it and it’s extremely overwhelming, but jean’s smart and he manages (but it’s still drowning him)). They start to scheme something, a major crimes unit task force. “We’ll change the world, jean. We’ll shift the tides, we’ll raise revachol out of the ashes”

Both of them strongly believe in this

Then jean’s girlfriend leaves him. His girlfriend of six years. And it all starts to go downhill. Harry is like oh yeah I know how to deal with this. I can teach you how to cope.

(cont. below cut coz this is long af and SUPER unstructured)

Harry’s coping methods are awful. He’s like. Pour yourself into your work and ignore your issues. when you can’t work, get drunk. And jean, being ten years younger and lower in rank, is like oh yeah harry knows what he’s doing why else would he be such a good cop. Fully trusts his opinion. And as a result jean becomes a drunk and starts to spiral down with harry.

Harry pulls him down. But it’s jean’s idea to try drugs. And it just gets worse and worse and worse from there. Another negative feedback loop. But this one’s like. They’re there for each other. There to help the other up. there when the comedown comes and knocks the wind out of them. there for all the messy messy shit that comes from drug and alcohol abuse. there to save the other from suicide. They're tight as fuck. They tear each other apart. They’d die for each other. And jean, ever the impressionable type, gets SUPER attached to harry, super emotionally dependent on him. And vice versa tbh!!!! Codependent as fuck, super toxic partnership (bc they’re so drunk and high all the time it starts to get abusive from both ends), overworking themselves to death, in such a hell of their own making

In the depths of it, when it’s at the very bottom of the barrel, when it’s really awful, they’re the type of guys who’ll give up together and say fuck it, mutual suicide. if we go out, we go out together, yeah?

After jean almost dies of overdose I think, the fear of god gets put into him and he realizes he’s drowning and how bad this is. Realizes this has all gone to hell. Realizes he wants to live and realizes shit needs to get better. remembers their old pact, to save revachol, to make the world better. This isn’t it. Doing this will do nothing for them but kill them, and after almost dying himself, jean realizes he doesn’t want to die. They have to try harder. They can’t keep doing this. He knows how harry is when he’s not tearing himself apart. There have been times where everything quiets and calms down and it’s like the first year again and hope comes back and revachol comes back and the future comes back. Times where jean realizes what it COULD be. That’s the thing. He’s SO aware of what it COULD be. That every time he gives up hope, and the hope comes back, jean is like shit man. You know. Things CAN be ok. Please. Let’s fix this. i don’t like seeing us like this. I don’t like all that brilliant genius you have gone to waste. Let’s get better. jamrock needs us. Revachol needs us.

But harry refuses and refuses and refuses and refuses. He does NOT want to get better. He NEVER wants to get better, he wants to drown and he wants jean to be there with him and when jean refuses to drown with him, refuses the mutual suicide pact, harry leaves him. Fine jean, I don’t need your help, I don’t need ANYONE’s help

And when harry comes back and it’s someone else that’s pulled him out of the water of despair, jean’s SO FUCKING PISSED because he’s been trying SO GODDAMNED HARD and it just shows that he’s not good enough, that he wasn’t the right one, that only someone else could’ve helped harry, that no matter how hard he tried, jean would never have been enough. he's more fixated on this than on the fact that finally harry's getting better, and one has to kinda' realize oh. jean just wanted to feel needed. jean just wanted to be someone's personal savior. jean's been doing this for harry, yes, but he's also been doing it for himself.

I dont know how that gets resolved yet. After hitting rock bottom and realizing the only way he has to go is up, jean tries to get better and get help for himself and for harry. He is, as I like to call him, a consummate professional. He tries to shrug off the addictions and the alcohol and tries to pour himself into his work, and as a result the precinct is kinda’ scared of him because he’s so damn tough and pushy about it. Like the coping goes from getting high and drunk to pushing other people around and micromanaging everything. Like he was a good cop before, even when he was just on receipts. Now he’s an even better cop because of harry and despite everything

Kim’s gonna’ show up and rock the balance of it all entirely.

A. Harry’s better because of Kim, who’s only known him for a week. After all jean’s done for harry, after being there for him, it takes some guy who doesn’t even fucking KNOW him to make harry hopeful again

B. Kim’s method of leadership is different from jean’s. Jean micromanages Everything and trusts no one to his job for him. The only person who’s good for the job is himself. The only person he can trust is himself. No one can let him down if it’s just him, and he’s promised himself not to let himself down. Meanwhile, Kim puts his trust in people to do their assigned jobs, and when they break his trust, he throws his authority into it and pulls them back in line. Kim may not be as good a detective as jean (or harry for that matter) because he doesn’t keep his mind open to options Off the beaten path (such as how when in the game harry was like. This door in the whirling is important. And Kim’s like. It’s just a door harry, it doesn’t matter. And then completely blocked off that option as a possibility), but he’s a damned good leader. What he lacks in detecting, he makes up for by relying on other people he’s working with and working as a team. We all have our faults but we also all bring everything to the table. So Kim gets in there and he’s like, trying to work with everyone and totally getting in jean’s way because jean is being authoritarian as fuck whereas Kim is calmly taking it authoritative style.

C. Jean is very concerned about his professional image. C-Wing has become a joke to everyone in the precinct. Jean also knows that he and Harry themselves have become a joke in the precinct. Jean has made up for it by putting on this very strong, controlling front, putting the fear of god into everyone and getting them to respect him as a cop. But now here’s this kitsuragi guy and he operates DIFFERENTLY and jean is having a VERY hard time trying not to crack in front of him. Trying to keep up his professional front. Except that Kim has caught onto this and Kim likes competition, and he’s got it in his head he has to find a way to get jean to respect him and a way for jean to respect harry again because Kim absolutely HATES how jean treats harry now: no respect, completely hopeless that harry will get better and resentful of Kim for being the one there for harry when it should’ve been jean. Jean treats Kim with some begrudging respect and admiration because he’s trying to keep this professional front up. He respects Kim as a cop, and some part of him is thankful that SOMETHING got harry out of his deep dark hole. But jean hates to admit that it wasn’t him that could help harry. Hates to admit to himself that he just wasn’t right for him. hates to admit that he wanted to see harry better out of some selfish reasoning, and hates to admit that some other part of him liked seeing harry broken because it proved to jean that everything is indeed hopeless.

Jean is scared to be hopeful again.

But there’s harry. And he’s smiling. And he’s trucking through it. And he’s trying to come clean. And he’s trying to be there. For revachol. For Kim. He has a reason to live again.

And in some stubborn part of jean’s heart, it’s making him hopeful again, too. But he’s been burned SO many times he’s scared to let that back in. Scared that as soon as he’ll start hoping again, harry will plummet back into the dark, and he’ll finally lose him forever.

So in the meanwhile he hates on Kim. Tries to be professional and keep it together and all that but goddamn. Fuck this guy. Fuck him. He doesn’t know that harry won’t get better. He doesn’t know SHIT. He wasn’t there for him. There’s no way he’ll help.

And Kim has picked up on that! But he’s also picked up on the very small hint of hope that jean’s got in there. And the very small hint of gratitude jean’s got in there. And Kim, being Kim, liking competition, being petty, not liking how jean is being such an ass outwardly when he doesnt have to be, not liking how jean refuses to trust ANYONE, decides that he has to pry that hope and gratitude out of jean. He knows jean’s a good cop. He knows he’s a team player. He knows if he gets jean out here, and if jean and harry are truly friends again, C-wing will finally be worth its mettle again. And if harry really wants to “change the world” as he’s been talking about, Kim knows jean is crucial to that. So.

Kim hassles jean. A lot. Constantly testing him. Constantly pushing him. Teasing him. Questioning his authority. Trying to pull it out of him, to get on the same level, to get him to trust everyone, and respect them all again.

And that above EVERYTHING is the thing that’ll make jean crack. Because he’s trying soooo hard to keep up his face and then here’s Kim prying him open again.

Like he learned it from someone.

i think it's basically a big trust issue haha. kim trusts jean because he knows jean is an officer of the rcm and a good one at that, but he doesn't like jean's lack of respect towards him. jean trusts kim for the same reasons (bc kim's an officer of the rcm and a good one at that), but he doesn't Want to bc he's jealous. harry trusts kim with his life (if kim says jump, harry Will jump), and harry also trusts jean with his life, though he doesn't know it. however, jean doesn't trust harry anymore. he wants to because he used to be able to but now harry's gone down the drain so much he can't and he hates seeing how much kim does trust harry and how much kim trusts him (jean himself). harry doesn't understand why jean doesn't trust him. we were partners right? for four years? haven't we been there for each other? and jean just doesn't want to come to terms with any of that

meanwhile in all of this there's judit. and she came from a-wing where she made the mistake of babying all the men there and got treated like shit for it, so now she's on a strict I Am Not Taking Care of Any of These Men and Their Issues regime. she is also a Consummate Professional, and lower rank than all of them (tho when harry gets partnered with kim, and jean gets promoted to lieutenant, she'll become the satellite officer lieutenant). jean Tries to ask her for opinions bc oh woman, woman may not be good at police work but woman is smart with emotional issues (a very incorrect opinion judit Always makes sure to call jean out on his bullshit for) and judit always just says 'just do your job, officer' but internally she thinks to herself maybe if they all you know just fucked and made up it would be better (coz there's Sexual Tension there for sure) but she keeps this opinion to herself and VERY buried. she does NOT like office drama. she would prefer it if nobody fucking dealt with that and everyone could do their jobs thank you very much. shit's hard let's get on with it, just trust the guy bc he's a fellow officer of the rcm and let's move on, okay? at this rate, she's convinced they're gonna' get themselves shot and killed for all this bullshit.

honestly it's just jean who's the issue here hahaha. kim's chill, he's okay with everyone, the 41st is loads better than the 57th (less racist, by a margin, for one). harry's struggling, but he's got support and he feels hopeful he can make it. jean on the other hand is the only guy sitting there and victim-blaming and rotting away and coming up with bullshit and being a complete jackass about everything. he's BURYING it, that's for sure. but internally it's tearing him apart. and it definitely bleeds over in how he treats kim and harry. come on, jean. get your shit together. do your fucking job. nobody wants to hurt you. i know mommy and daddy yelled at you a lot when you were a kid, but none of these people want you dead. not even kim. he's just messing with you to get you to lighten up and get on the same page as everyone. come on man. stop your moping. they love you, too, i promise

so yeah that's my extremely long unstructured jeanthoughts essay that'll probably become more solidified the more i write him and jean himself tells me what's up but yeah. i like the guy. he's so. fucked.

good for him 🥰

#c4rg0f1l3s #yeah.#disco elysium #disco elysium spoilers #jean vicquemare #harry du bois #kim kitsuragi #not saying anything but i do have shipping agendas HAH #aro shipping agendas. no romance. just dependency. i like it when guys want to depend on each other #did you know i really really like it when a guy is so misguided and mentally ill #also jean bpd moments girly is going thru it #i put my fingers on all of them and added my funny little interpersonal drama that might be ooc #i am not immune to writing characters who feel and think too much about everything oops #just personality disorder things #shoves them in my mouth #also judit. i like that one #SIGH #marfă din elysium

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p0rchc0ll4ps3 · 1 month

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Thinking about pov for fanfic writing and considering Harry Mr. 'in your personal space can opener' du bois and thinking that since it's no longer a game where you make the choices and you decide his fate but instead a fanfiction about his existence that is no longer in your control specifically that it would be very fitting if he talked in first person and constantly broke the fourth wall

Kim I feel would be in third person bc he's so removed and "in control" (but maybe the pov shifts and he starts talking in first as he gains confidence and comes out of his long dark) and Jean also first person but in the way you would read someone's diary. And I'm not sure about judit but I'm feeling third person for her but I don't know yet bc I haven't gotten a grasp on her yet.

I love second person but I think second person is for characters who aren't very well defined, who don't have a good sense of self, who are still being molded. Which while Harry very much IS this, I think he really comes into his own personhood after martinaise with kim at the 41st.

On second thought I wonder if Jean is the blurry one. He very well might be (in a way almost also like Harry moving on from that is moving on from Jean too hmmm)

#c4rg0f1l3s #harry du bois #disco elysium #I should be asleep but damn my executives been dysfunctioning horribly #marfă din elysium

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p0rchc0ll4ps3 · 1 month

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random harry / jean pre-martinaise thoughts. headcanons mostly since the game doesn't give Much to go off. wrote this to gather my thoughts for how to write the jean/harry dynamic.

warning for suicide mentions and also dora is underage (17) when harry meets her. also abusive toxic relationships and domestic violence. also brief nsfw mention (just "they fuck" and that's it, nothing in-depth). also these people r homophobic

so jean:

Partnered with Harry from '46 to '49

officially met harry after dora left harry in '45. Never met dora. was aware of / had talked to harry b4 then, but they didn't work together

Partnered w Harry after a previous partner left Harry.

Only guy left (along with trant but jean forced trant to stay)

then Harry timeline maybe:

Met Dora when he was 23 and she was 17 in ’30. They lived together for 3 years. The first 2 years are perfect, happy, out of a dream.

Cracks start to form in the facade about year 3, but they try to work through it. But she’s young and naive. She convinces him to join the rcm bc he cares so much for revachol it hurts. Stop wasting your potential being a gym teacher, be a cop. Save the world

And he does he goes and joins. But then they start to run out of money. And he starts to lose it

Joined rcm in ’33 when he was 26

Did so many cases probably coz of stimulants + alcohol

Has had amnesiac blackouts in the past

In the beginning Harry's GOOD. Hes SMART. He manages. And then they load case after case on him. And hes already manic depressive as fuck (bc i hc him with bipolar i). So hes already working up a healthy alcohol addiction. Bc he and dora argue a lot.

After the first year or two, the arguments start to get more and more frequent. They’re not good for each other, but you don’t just Leave someone. You have to stick with them. And maybe dora also had hope he’d get better

But towards the end it’s toxic as fuck, she hits him, he hits her, they yell at each other. Toxic environment breeds toxic out of both of them.

She basically matured around him, under his influence, so it’s VERY abusive, and she starts to come into her own person and demand independence, and fight back, and he doesnt like that. And she also doesnt like it when hes sad and she TELLS HIM that. And he doesnt like that. Bc shes SHIT with his mental illness and not patient or understanding at all. Plus he's drunk and high so much, so as far as she’s concerned that’s why he’s like that (his manic and depressive; she blames it on the drugs and the drink) (ignoring the fact that he’s been this way since the beginning bc the first two perfect years remain without issue in her mind, even tho there are plenty of issues there)

Dora left him in ’45, 12 years after he joined the rcm.

She’s 38 in ’51, he’s 44. 6 year age gap. Were together for 15 years

Had a previous partner in the rcm from 33 to 46. 13 years working together!!!!!!! (Harry was 26 to 39; old guy (born in ’85) was 54 to 67)

Maybe an older guy who mentored harry. Like a real noir type of guy. Gets partnered with this new young guy bc hes really good at his job and harry can keep up. Was like. Yeah no I dont want to work with anyone anymore, but then theres harry and he needs a partner and the older guy is like fuck. I like this one lemme grab him. Bc he sees harry’s potential. They work REALLY well together. Old guy teaches harry a lot of shit. hes super bitter on the outside and hardened by life, and harry gets a lot of his vices from him. The guy’s a drunk old cranky bastard and no one wanted to work with him and they all thought oh this guy won’t lighten up. But he picks harry. And harry opens him up.

He’s really good with harry’s manic episodes. But it’s like. They bounce off each other, balance each other out. But also maximize the shit. Encourage the bad habits in each other

Old guy is shit with the depressive episodes. Harry says I feel like killing myself, old guy says go ahead and do it nothing in life matters

Harry got manic sometime in that time frame in the year and a half after dora left him and said FUCK this old guy. Fuck your cranky bitter awful ass youre dragging me down. Youre too old. You cant keep up with me. I want that one other guy (jean) bc he’s smart he’s young hes capable he can fix me. Fuck off, im working with jean now (maybe he and jean have had a case or 2 in the past that helped harry realize jean's potential)

So the old guy quit. He just ditches he’s like ok suffer whatever see if I fucking care. Imagine your partner of 11 years starts getting super pissed at you and now getting emotionally dependent on you and clingy as fuck the old guy just COULDNT handle that

harry was manageable in the beginning. it started to seriously go to shit when dora left him bc before he would go home and take it out on dora. so his work didnt see his bad side until he lost her. She was his anchor, his life, his rock, and when he lost her he had no fucking idea what to do. started to take out his issues on his coworkers instead

Jean again:

Jean has been in the rcm for a while, maybe since he was 20 in ’37? He’s a sensitive sort of guy in there, he feels how the world hurts, so he wants to help. But also he joins bc it makes him feel tough. He can push people around. Gives him an excuse to be a bully. See dad? IM TOUGH. Fuck you (he has major mommy/daddy child abuse issues. bc i hc him as having been a very sensitive kid who cried a lot. and got bullied by everyone for it, family especially. now he has a major superiority / not-man-enough complex)

Hes also Really good at his job. Hes happy doing housework!!! He likes patrolling and giving people tickets and doesnt want to do much else. plus he's very bonded to his horse. therapy horse

Jean is diagnosed by the lazareth for depression when he’s 27 bc he slips a little on his copwork I think.

Harry grabs him in ’46 when jean is 29, so jean does horse for 9 years, then 5 years of homicide with harry where he goes thru the absolute stress of his life getting thrown into lieutenant position completely unprepared for it

Jean is ok with harry at first bc he has hope, jeans a guy who hopes, and hes like ok harry will get thru this hes smart, but slowly jeans like ah fuck nope. This ones a lost cause. They work together for 4 and a half years!

Harry helps jean thru a breakup and is genuinely nice. I think harry slips into a manic episode when first working with jean and jean knows that side of him first, then he stabilizes, then sinks into depression again

In the 4 years they work together:

In the beginning of working with harry, jean breaks up with his girlfriend of like. 6 years. Who he’s known since ’40 when he was 23 (it’s '46 now and he’s 29). Harry helps him through it and jean gets really attached to harry coz of that

About 3 years in (in '49) they have homosexual relations. Ie they fuck. Bc harry gets really awful. Really starts slipping

And the case load is a LOT for jean. And he’s been thru 5 girlfriends in three years since that other one and it’s been shit. They’ve all left him bc he has to choose work over them (and also coz he's a crybaby but also coz he's super pushy and controlling)

And jean’s lonely as fuck. And he’s starting to drink too bc of harry. And bc of his influence. And they fuck and jean gets obsessed with him and he’s like fuck this is gonna’ wreck everything (there's a lot of internal homophobia here too). He really tries to be professional but it’s HARD when harry’s got so many ups and downs

Bc jean genuinely is there for and DOES help harry. Harry just. Keeps relapsing. Constantly. But jean keeps coming back bc Harrys so clingy and genuinely nice to him etc

Jean’s dealt with harry suicide attempts like so many times in this time period. Countless

But in ’49 b4 they fuck, harry tried to make a move on jean bc he really was getting obsessed with him, and jean denied him bc jean’s homophobic as fuck

A week later harry kills himself. Or. he’s supposed to be dead, but he doesn’t die somehow

That’s when he goes missing for a few days and jean finds harry in his apartment half dead. Tried to hang himself

They get SUPER codependent after that. And it gets toxic. Bc jean hates being emotionally vulnerable with another man and bc harry can get violent when rejected or just violent unexpectedly

There may be a jean suicide attempt in there too, but something like passively suicidal: doesn’t have a regard for himself or a sense of self-preservation. Harry’s had to save his life before, help him out of danger (and vice versa tbh)

Jean is more trigger happy than harry, so part of the reason harry has so few kills is bc jean took them. But also jean is really good at stopping harry. And ALSO harry just. Really doesn’t want to kill people. He talks first, shoots later (unlike Kim who shoots first, talks later). Hes a really competent cop, its just that his unmedicated bipolar ass and his work stress and his breakup issues and the jean codependency really drown him

i know there's definitely more going on here, and i could go earlier about harry (he's a child of divorce and learned a lot from his parents about how to treat a partner (ie yell and shout at her), he has a lot of trauma from working child labor and also from watching his friends die in his teens) but these r my basic vague thoughts rn

#anyhow #c4rg0f1l3s #disco elysium #disco elysium spoilers #ig? yeah maybe for dora? it's mostly headcanons #my writing #kinda'#harry du bois #jean vicquemare #dora ingerlund #do i need to put this under a cut??#disco elysium headcanons #i might get slack for this. ITS FINE. im trying to keep all my hcs very revacholcore im ngl #theres a specific way the game sets up its characters n i wanna try and capture that #scary still. lets see how it goes #marfă din elysium

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p0rchc0ll4ps3 · 2 months

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Hot take but Kim autism is so wild to me coz imo he's emotionally repressed coz of his childhood neglect and his trauma akdhjgjfjfj

Autism king around here is Harry

Guy who lost his memory and still knows all the names of all the birds and all the names of all the machines and how to put them together

#c4rg0f1l3s #releasing this into the wild to get one koed #disco elysium #marfă din elysium

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p0rchc0ll4ps3 · 6 days

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Harry x judit.

#consider this. really hard.#ok bye.#c4rg0f1l3s

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p0rchc0ll4ps3 · 24 days

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okay ya'll i got another question. what do you think the architectural styles in revachol are like? are there any reoccurring design elements throughout the game or is just old buildings:tm:? i've noticed hexagons, wood, metal, and large pane glass windows, but that's about it.

if you think about the different eras of revachol here's kinda what you get. LONG FUCKING THOUGHTS ABOUT ARCHITECTURE INCOMING (2k words. i did it again. i went on a tangent). warning for mentions of genocide, mentions of culture erasure, colonization shit, racism, classism, etc

in the beginning, first settlements: before revachol was the revachol of current-era, it was a bunch of settled townships. i feel like there's an indigenous population here that has been since wiped out / only pockets remain. that's colonization for you! but i also feel like the indigenous population got worked into the culture of revachol as well. there's old, old pagan roots that seep through and into everything. the basis of revachol's culture is found in these pagan roots, mixed in with the culture of every nation in elysium to make one revacholian/insulindean culture.

at some point the townships, villages, and cities all unified into one Large city of Revachol. this is known as the Unification. i'm not sure where the original revachol was. there were a lot of folk-style houses and frontier-type buildings. architecture wasn't really something payed attention to: people just built what they could where they wanted to build it in the way they new how to build. so i think like old, wild-west type frontier shit, but all sorts of different folk influences from the countries they emigrated from. it might even have been less-sophisticated than that, considering it was 380 years ago. maybe stuff like the church in martinaise

all the old suzerainty monarchy buildings and neighborhoods: (in jamrock especially, which i think is the heart of revachol and where the monarchy used to be. the old wealth in west revachol vs the new wealth and gentrification and corporate greed now in revachol east. at some point the monarchy decided jamrock would be the new heart of the world, it being in the center of revachol as well.)

(cont. under cut, this is long)

after the unification, as the monarchy builds up, you get an era of mass-urban planning, reworking the old neighborhoods into new, architecturally designed ones to give revachol a unified sense of culture. there's a LOT of different leaders, so there's a LOT of different architectural styles that come out of these eras, based on what the leader was interested in / if they even cared about rebuilding

the styles probably have various influences from revachol's various imports: samara (the apricots), iilmaraa (marble and tobacco. this is definitely a HUGE influence bc they would build all their palaces out of this marble; i think they probably have something like ile marat revival, which is just copying ancient iilmaraan temples and cities), semenine (sugar), and cocaine from mundi. underneath all of it is the original insulindean folk architectural styles, and the original folk beliefs, superstitions, and religions

here's a few styles from this era that i think would be there:

the monarchy based off old-world temples and churches. holy and powerful. these are the oldest

residential and neighborhoods of a sort of "mundi revival" which is replicating the styles of the home country (bc these r colonists that come in). a nostalgia for the world left behind

then art deco and art nouveau, but it wouldn't be like our art deco and art nouveau. maybe the nouveau is oceancore instead of leaves and flowers? maybe the deco has to do with airships? conquering the pale? sunrise and light? not sure. these represent the progress and the "golden age" in a way that is futuristic and forward-looking.

GOLD from the Filippe III reign, and maybe gold is synonymous with downfall? bc i know that the cocaine and the gold era is when revachol really went to the pits. i feel this style turns away from the art found in the old government/monarchy buildings, the revival styles, and the deco and nouveau styles. tasteless, gaudy trash that represents as much opulence and luxury as possible. i feel like this sets revachol's standard for wealth and luxury: revachol east's new buildings are still based off the filippean gold style. this is the newest architectural style of the golden era of the suzerainty

not sure who's reign is the one of mass urban planning. someone gets it in their head that revachol should have wide boulevards, big parks, and a metro and tram system (like what happened in paris, france in the 1930s). maybe Flippe II, the Opulent? but im not sure how the technology would line up. regardless, by the time the communists take over in 02, revachol has been urban planned the shit, old old neighborhoods destroyed, a big, sprawling, sometimes nonsensical metro put in, electric lamps put in, a trolley system put in. modernized. during this era of modernization was when the most art deco and art nouveau styles came in, so a lot of the "newer" stuff (before the gold craze) such as the trolleys and the metro and the electricity and the power plants and the promenades and boulevards, etc. are in this style. a lot of this urban planning also stems out of the inherent racism and classism in the concept of "urban blight" and needing to "prettify" the city, ie erase the poor and/or immigrant neighborhoods and make this a beautiful, white city again (we're a revacholian, insulindean people, not a mixed melting pot. very western european ideals)

the only thing always left untouched are the massive temples of the monarchy, built out of iilmaraan marble and other imports from the rest of elysium (being the original center of the world, revachol is full of all sorts of influences from everywhere. not sure about seol. seol's closed its gates, so not a lot of stuff comes out of there, i think)

the commune: communism is about give everyone everything equally. whoever was leader of communist insulinde / revachol at the time (in between the civil wars) started a mass systematization project.

so they started bulldozing all the suzerainty-era revival, deco, and nouveau neighborhoods and replacing them with huge, monolothic, wall-like apartment blocks so everyone has equal living spaces. mass housing projects! yippee! now everyone has somewhere to live at least

communism comes with an attempt at coming up with a Single Unified Revacholian Culture which includes no religion, glorification of industry and agriculture (ie power to the lower class and the workers) and a push for industrial and agricultural progress, celebration of natural landforms, celebration of the old folk origins before colonization, etc. many plans are drawn up. there's a scheme to rebuild revachol from the ground up and make it a bastion of communist glory at the center of the known world. this systemization extends to other cities on insulinde as well, where industry is built up and mass housing projects are started. this is the era when you get upgraded factories and infrastructure. it's possible the commies built the 8/81. obviously, plans are cut short. there's mismanagement, corruption, civil wars, and finally the coalition bombing.

there's a few styles here as well:

brutalism, a testament to modern communist progress

revacholian revival, an attempt at a new take on the old mundi revival style architecture of the suzerainty

a lot of national symbols are incorporated into both brutalist and revival styles. lots of folk patterns, folk housing, folk symbolism. the apartment blocks look like impersonal monuments, but each one of them has their own stylings and paintings and colors

government buildings incorporate both brutalist progressivism and national folk glory

the folk shit comes from old, original insulindean indigenous/pagan influences. there's also influences from the folk stuff from mundi with a few of the import countries thrown in such as ilmaraa, etc. some attempt at revitalizing an appreciation for the places people came from to form a completely new, completely revacholian/insulindean identity

the communists restore (or attempt to / get started on restoring) the suzerainty palaces. most of these palaces are bombed out of existence by the coalition. (that's the burnt-out quarter in jamrock). a few palaces still remain on the outskirts of revachol, or in east revachol, or along the beaches, etc., but these are mostly pleasure palaces and residences for old kings and most, if not all, have fallen into disrepair. none of the government buildings are left

the new:

i know the economy is somehow, but im pretty sure during this tax haven, tax boom, whatever, there was a lot of architectural progress. old buildings got updated, some buildings got restored. things that weren't too expensive of projects to take on

i think there's a new style here that represents hope and optimism. a revival of the art deco style as well as the nouveau (spring blooming associations) as well as new architectural styles involving flashy colors, anti-brutalism, and anti-suzerainty style. taking all the old stuff and deconstructing it, combining the monarchy style with the art deco and the brutalism, making a truly new, unique architecture of revachol. maybe it's called new disco or something haha. it is a counter-culture, revolutionary type of architecture. it takes the monarchy and government styles and makes it for the people. it revitalizes old dreams out of the ashes. it forms something new. it's rebirth

this is when they start building hella' skyscrapers, especially in jamrock which is the heart of the industry, mostly in this new disco style (though the rich out in the east have always built skyscrapers, but theirs, according to the ideas of luxury, are flashy, gold monstrosities, all rigid and gaudy, without the vitality and disorganized chaos of new disco)

then the economy tanks again and revachol once more sinks into hell

you may ask yourself where's international and mid-century modern and minimalist styles? while i absolutely love the former two styles, i just can't see it that revachol would ever be refined. the communist's brutalist structures and stark, fascist government buildings are as refined as it gets. refined, meant to impose, meant to feel safe and strong. otherwise revachol's barely restrained need to live and breathe and shout from the rooftops flows out of every single one of their buildings, even the wealthy

also, a side note. all these architectural styles and shit definitely parallel how technology, furniture, fashion, hairstyles, art styles, literature, etc. are designed. all the ideals that are built into the architecture styles are reflected in the styles of the things the people use and buy and make and the way they look. but i don't know those things that well, i have architecture interests and that's about it, hahaha.

like you know how in game, their technology is completely different looking from ours? it's like ours but to the left. unfortunately, i'm not entirely sure what the designer's inspirations for it all are from, so i don't have much to go off in terms of designing new things

#c4rg0f1l3s #disco elysium #i really want heavy duty elysium concept art #like a big fat guidebook of elysium architectural styles and design styles and all that #PLEASE #im probably gonna spend today drawing fuckass buildings instead of writing #my life is so difficult #im heavy worldbuilding here yall

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