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#but thinking of his past look he didnt have that yet so a chipped tooth makes more sense. but i dont wanna chip his canine
crunchchute · 6 months
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red pill blue pill. chipped lateral incisor at the front or snaggletooth canine i cannot pick for william
edit: chipped or missing..
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idjitlili · 4 years
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Heat of the moment
Thorin x reader
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As requested on quotev , by a lovely reader, they wanted more thorin so here you are.
Summary: you end up in middle earth , only to fall for the dwarven king.
N/o/p= number of pillows Chips= fries , we British here, plus in lotr Sam calls them chips so that's how it's gonna be. Fries are skinny chips. Word count:2673
It was a day in July , well night you had fell asleep in your bed in your room on your n/o/p ,nice and toasty. You had been dreaming about eating a nice bunch of chips , golden thick potatoes. They tasted like keanu reeves love in a potato. oh how you wish to real live that, but you were roughly awoke by something prickly poking you. "Five more minutes ,mummy /mommy/mama." You groaned as the thing stopped poking you, you felt rough ground stabbing your back as you rolled over.
You felt under you with your left hand to only to feel your mattress sheet not your mattress , and just your fluffy blanket you used in the summer instead of the duvet somethings. You slowly opened your eyes , as the bright light hit your eyes , causing you to groan again rubbing your eyes to make them focus. When you opened them again you were faced with a bunch of short men and an old man and an even shorter man. You look at them wide eye, as hatted dwarf held a stick that poked you they look at you in confusion some held weapons.
"Why are you in my room?!" You had almost shouted , grabbing a pillow holding it up in defence,you looked pretty bad,what you gonna do braid eachothers hair and have a pillow fight. Its only lucky that you had put your new pair of shoes in their box on the other side of your bed ,with socks so you could cherish them. Well be ready for the next day,to wear them inside.Little did you know would be travelling with these short men,due to the wizards say so. "uh,lass this is the forest." the short man with the stick and hat had spoken up causing you to gasp when noticed you were in a forest,and so was your bed,you could ony come up with answer to this mess...
"HElp! I've been kidnapped." you had shouted,remove your blanket pulling on your socks and shoes ,standing up,before you can run the majestic hair dwarf shouts. "circle her lads," and with that a barrier of short men surround you. You stood on your bedding ,luckily in clean shoes ,and your night clothes aka a strappy top,with your favourite tv show characters on it,and the shorts that come with,and yeah they are short. You were exposed by strange men ,and you didnt like that,your bust on show and yours ass if you bent over. Thats what she said.
You picked up your blanket ,placing the pillow down,wrapping it around you ,to cover youself. "what do you want from me?" you had spoke anooyed by the sitution,though the majestic man was quite the looker,if you were honest."your the only that fell out of the sky,what do you want?" A short ginger one had growled ,pissed off."what Gloin is trying to say is that we never touched you ,Dwalin was on watch when you fell ,we do not know how you didnt wake up from the impact." the shoretest man that reminded you very much of John waston from sherlock.
You didnt know what to think of the sitution ,then the man that was apparently a wizard spoke to you and the majestic man privately,saying that he was going to try get you home ,after you admitted you never had heard of Rohan ,or erebor or middle earth,concluding you werent from this world. So basically the wizard you know as now Gandalf is forcing this other dude who is a dwarf , a dwarf! Can you believe it? on this journey to reclaim his home ,he wasnt impressed but soon enough he agreed.
Gandalf had forced the company to stop at a small village :so he could buy you clothes,a tooth brush,cleaning supplies and womanly products,you had thanked him dearly. You now wore ,your small trainers with these legging pants and a tunic plus a coat but it was too hot for that right now,during the day anyways. Then you all were back on the road ,and you would have to share a pony with one of the dwarves,which ended up with you sharing with Thorin's youngest nephew.
It didnt take much for you to lift yourself up on the pony,well actually you just swung your leg up and boom you sat upon it as kili mounts behind you struggling a bit. "damn ,miss y/n those are some long legs." he had smirked from behind ,you felt like he was going to be doing a lot of flirting. "uh yeah ,puberty does that sometimes." you spoke gripping the rains of the pony lightly,as the company began to move.your coat in your new bag on the side of the pony hanging,leaving you in your tunic and pants,kili pushed at against you back,one arm around your waist.
"I would sure love to get lost in them." his grip tightened a little,as fili laughed at his brothers remark,your face screwed up."..uh...how long do dwarves live generally?" you questioned,to anyone in ear range. "around 200-250 years ,lassie." Bofur spoke up behind you ,you hummed in response. "and how old are you kili?" Thorin was listening in on the conversation as the whole company had went silent to hear it too. "77." he was confused at what you were gettingat ,he was a little scared even.
"right so the average human lives for 80 years ,right. So if you was to date or court me ,i'll be dead before you mature." bilbo laughed at you ,with some of the others. "what are you getting at?" he stated his face like pink with embarrassment. "if i was to get with any dwarf ,they would be older."you had smirked thinking of someone in mind,Thorin smiled to himself only Dwalin was able to see,he smirked at him,for Thorin to give him a look which almost told him to drop it. Which he didnt later he would tease him.
Thorin had grew to like you more than a member of his company,in the past couple of weeks ,as did you he was very attractive how could you not. Now you were in Rivendell,in which Elrond had supplied the company with food as he talked to andalf about you.It concluded he had no idea how this could happen and then later they would talk to lady galadriel about it. she didnt have a clue,except galadriel thought there was a reason you were brought to this world and you should carry on with the company.
After that you had been led to your room,which had a bloody bath,oh my you were so glad about. Once you had finish you had wrapped a single towel around your body,going to get dressed ,at this point it was late at night everyone would have been asleep by now.However before you could even dress,your bag was gone,with all your clothes ,and an elf had taken your dirty ones when you had gotten in the bath. You had no clue what to do,you would not go to sleep naked in the elves guest bed,not that they werent clean,youjust never know whos been in there or done what.
You decided the best thing to do was go wondering around until you found someone,just in a towel and your shoes,wet hair sticking to your skin ,making you shiver. Opening the beautiful carved pine door,quietly ,before shutting it behind you walking down the hall. It was more than cold out in the hall,your room had a fire lit by the same elf that took your clothes. In honesty you knew you have to go ask onee of the dwarves if they had a spare tunic or something;but that was an incredibly awkward and emabarrassing.If you went fili he would tell kili and then they would tease you,kili would tell everyone how those legs looked in just his tunic,you didnt want it to happen and you didnt want them laughing at you.
Thorin.
You felt like you could trust him,but you felt like if he saw you like this he would never like you back,and you had developed big feelings for him. Even though you barely spoke,he would check on you regularly not when the others where around,when bathing in the rivers he would stand watch, Apparently just incase you drown ,or the others especially his nephews tried peeking or you got attacked. Some how he would know when you got your period he take your watch ,lay hot stones in your bed ,he even made you tea.Dwalin would grin,knowing his bestfriend deeply cared for the human from another world. Damn Thorin and those thic-
you were so deep in thought you didnt notices a figure walk out thier door as you walked down the hall,causing you crash into them. You had lost grip of the towel ,only for the figure to pull you against them holding the back of the towel up,pulling around your sides. You gasped,scared the figure had seen your breasts,but their actions were so sonic speed they hadnt and you were pressed against their muscular chest. You had looked up to see Thorin ,your eyes had widened,you had taken the sides of the towel wrapping around yourself again ,as Thorin looked away. "I-im so sorry." you had spoken stuttering slightly,looking at the floor,before going to walk away,but Thorin had gripped your arm stopping you. "what are doing out here,y/n,in just a towel." he had asked sternly,he thought you were to no good,if you get me,and he was not impressed.
"uh..well.um I had a bath went to get dressed but my bag was gone,so it turns out they had told me that they were going to gift me stuff..but they  must have used it for my measurements,okay so I dont know.All i do know is I am search of something to wear,Its freezing." you spoke still not sure on your own words,it didnt seem right that the elves would take all your clothes. "stupid bloody elves,just leave you naked to freeze to death.I have some spare clothes if you need them." he hated the elves more that they had taken your belonging ,yet didnt he liked the way your hair fell once wet and the shine on your skin from the now cold water.
You had nodded eagerly ,he hadled you into his room,guiding you to sit down in the chair next to the fire,whilst he got you cllothes.He had came back with only only his dark blue tunic,handing it to you."I'm sorry ,my spare trousers are currents drying since kili decided to jumped on me covering me in mud like a dog." he spoke turning around allowing you to dress quickly infront of the fire,you let out a small giggle. "its fine,you have helped me so much,i would be laughed at if i had ran into anyone else. Doesnt matter what anyone else says you are very nice dude. thank you so much,goodnight." you had hugged him,he stood there a little taken back at your words hugging you back wishing you goodnight as you went back to your room.
He had watched you leave ,he like seeing you in his tunic,which only reached barely your mid thigh. He knew he wouldnt be sleeping soon,he was glad you bumped into him and not anyone else,he already thought you were beautiful from your personality but now you were bodacious.
In the morning your clothes still hadnt turned up,and an elf had knocked informing you for breakfast ,so you had no choice but to try sort your hair and go to breakfast in just a tunic and shoes.You looked like you were really at home and sorta a whore. Not that it was your fault at all. You had walked there crossing your arms looking down ,mulitple gasps were heard as you arrived.You had quickly sat down to the closest open sit which turns out was next to Thorin. "lass where are your clothes?"
"yeah you are practially naked."
"damn those legs bend over for me." kili had smirked saying the second,only to be kicked hard under the table by thorin ,who you sent a smile to him thanking him.
"treat her with some respect,shes not some bloody toy." Thorin had spat angrily at his nephew ,who looked down in embarrassment. "BAHAHAH YOU MUST  BE SO EMBARRASSED." You were tempted to say,pointing at him while laughinghysterically at him,sound like someone? yeah i would show you a picture but he stands to still I cant see him."im sorry ,miss y/n," he spoken sincerely towards you. "itsfine,dont worry about it." you had stated you were embarrassed by the sitution too.
After a few minutes Dwalin decided to break the silence,"lass where are your clothes,seriously?" he asked,he knew that wasnt your shirt.Damn the elves appart from elrond ,and Lindir looked at you in disgust. "uh well,I actually dont know,i got of the bath and then asked couldnt find my bag anywhere." you spoke looking at the fruits that sat infront of you,eating a piece of mellon. "oh miss y/n,i had an extra bag in mine and kili's room,i didnt know where it was from. I'll go get it,it must be yours." and with that fili rushed off to get it fpr you,soon returning passing it to as you place it on the floor. "thank you,fili.2 he had sent you a smile that reminded you deeply of seth rogen ,you couldnt help but picture him as seth rogen if you thought of him,you didnt know why.
And with that everyone was back to eating breakfast;oh what until someone questioned you again. "wait is that uncles tunic?" kili had questioned you ,causing a small blush to apear on your face,you nod going back to eating.Fili and Kili snickered,you looked up glaring at them wanting to know what was so funny. "did you happen to stay with him last night.?" and with that they burst out laughing again ,now with bofur.  "are you still tight about me not wanting you to get lost in my legs?hm" you had spoke annoyed ,causing bilbo to luagh,gandalf smirking at you.kili and fili stopped laughing,kili just blushed again. "nothing did happen,but I would mostly definitly enjoy having him in my legs." and with that you got up ,crouching down to grab your bag before heading to your to your room.
Only for Thorin to run after you,you were about to walk into your room,only to be smashed into the wall,lips pressed roughly against yours,you knew who it was from his beard ,and his strength. Your legs wrapped tightly around his waist,as his hands cupped your bare bottom gently,before taking you into your room. In the end you did get a proper apology from kili and life was swell.
that was until,HEAT OF THE MOMENT 'rise and shine y/n' joking joking.
Turns out your purpose in middle earth was to save Thorin and his nephews,
idk what happened it went pretty shit.
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gulescamisade · 6 years
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Virginia:  Day 10
DAVENFORTH: -Does this university have a gym? It better. Well, Dave is in there. Not that you can see him, there's a heavy punching bag taking quite the abuse. There's flurries of hits, but their source can't be seen.-
HIGHBLOOD: =Watching this. He's here. He's maybe always been here. Crunches nacho slowly, loudly.=
DAVENFORTH: -When the fuck did you even get here-
DAVENFORTH: -Flashes in and kicks the bag, sending it flying into a wall. He lands, huffing, sweating.-
QIRIN: =she comes in eventually, sitting quietly on a bench with her hands open in her lap, watching Sonic the Hedgehog beat up a gremlin.=
HIGHBLOOD: =hands Qirin cheesy nacho chips= :o)
DAVENFORTH: -He hasn't noticed the audience yet, walking over and hoisting the bag up, placing it back on its rack.-
QIRIN: =....thanks. She nods and takes it, not wishing to be the one to disrupt the silence.=
HIGHBLOOD: =loudly crunches chip again=
DAVENFORTH: -Looks up. Oh. He gives a sup nod-
HIGHBLOOD: you tirin already brother, shit just got good =eats more chips and nods at him=
QIRIN: =waves gently. hi, she read the news.=
DAVENFORTH: Nah just didnt realize i had an audience
DAVENFORTH: -Rolls his shoulders and goes back to punching the bag, normally this time. He's putting a lot of effort behind these swings, the impacts very audible in the gym-
-----------
ERIDAN: -Somewhere in the first floor of the university science department, a fish troll has made his headquarters. The door of a lab is thrown open while music plays, if it could be called music. It was muffled and the signal was terribe with static. It was obviously a radio hotwired to pick up whatever far off-planet station that dared to air all the way to Earth. A small sign of life in the otherwise gloomy dark school hallways.- 
ERIDAN: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=And-yo5jwko
ROXANNE: -Obviously if she was going to tour around anywhere to distract herself from the stress and danger it would be the science building. It would be like a blast from the past. When Roxanne had still been in school she spent all her time in her campus science department or observatory (good place to study, really quiet.) She walks aimlessly around the empty halls of the first floor peeking in through a window or two until the sound of shitty music gains her attention and she follows it until she is looking in through the open door to the lab.- 
ROXANNE: Huh. -Looks like they were re-purposing rooms.-
ERIDAN: -Repurposing the rooms in a manner of speaking. The tables were lined with Eridan's "meager" collection of assault weapons. Everything ranging from harpoon guns to muskets, photon, and of course, the standard automatic was laid out on display.- 
ERIDAN: -Eridan himself was half sprawled over the professor's desk, having fallen asleep over maps of the Washington battle grounds next to his honest-to-god duct taped radio hull. The source of the static music.- (zzzz)
ROXANNE: -What a hero, what a pro.- 
ROXANNE: -Maybe she should just let him sleep, but tickle her curious at just why he was napping in a slightly redecorated lab while leaving dangerous weaponry about.- ROXANNE: Hm. -She knocks on the frame of the doorway to see if that will wake him up.-
ERIDAN: -SNORTS AWAKE, hunting knife almost instantly in his hand. Maybe he fell asleep with it? He lifts his head to peer blearily around, glasses askew.- zzzuhfuck -Spots Roxanne at the door, eyebrows furrowing until he's giving a mighty stretch at the desk.- 
ERIDAN: oh dammit 
ERIDAN: justa human -yawns toothily, using the pointy end of the knife to scratch at the base of his horns.- wwhats the commotion
ROXANNE: -Yep just a human 8) - 
ROXANNE: -Briefly flinches when he wakes up with a knife of all things.- Jeez ya' expecting certain company with that tooth pick? ...horn pick?
ERIDAN: surprised you aint similar wwise givven your situation -The horn pick feels good actually.... he casually keeps sweeping the blunt end along the wwavvy shape of his horns. The amphibious insectoid that he is, totally half asleep.- 
ERIDAN: mess hall aint this wway if youre lookin
ROXANNE: Man I'd be real dumb if I was lookin' for a bite to eat. 
ROXANNE: Surprise Im here to steal the guns you left out on the table for absolutely basically anyone to come and get. -jabs a thumb at the arms display. Do you get her point.-
ERIDAN: -gives her this LOOK.- wwhat 
ERIDAN: do you think im sendin these folks out there empty handed 
ERIDAN: kinda presumptuous a you assumin im runnin that kinda operation here
ERIDAN: takin is wwhat theyre FOR
ROXANNE: Right right i get that, but no sign in sheet or nothin'?
ROXANNE: Dang its like you got no respect for 'em. -Steps all the way in and eyes the collection close up. Some of these are nice.-
ROXANNE: Also seems dangerous.
ERIDAN: yeah probably thats also in essence the point -rubbing his eyes under his glasses and then reaches under his desk. Time to pour himself a drink.-
ROXANNE: -Picks up the automatic and looks it over, is it in good condition?- ROXANNE: Then you run a risky armory.
ERIDAN: meh -Damn. He has no more cups. Just swings back this rock n rye flavored faygo with a grimace.- 
ERIDAN: -All the rifles are in good condition. It's one of the few things Eridan gives a shit about enough to invest and maintain.-
ERIDAN: run your owwn armory if you wwanna criticize
ROXANNE: If I had plans ta' stick around i might. We could have a whole competition, best arms dealer wins.
ROXANNE: -Puts down the automatic and picks up the harpoon gun, inspecting it in quite the same manner and then aiming it at the opposite wall. Her finger isnt on the trigger of course, but shes never shot one before and wanted to try holding it.-
ERIDAN: run me outta business fine 
ERIDAN: so long as the job gets done -The safety's on and it gleams sharply in the flourescent lighting. A deadly harpoon, especially in the right hands.-
ROXANNE: -Noice. Its got a good weight to it.- Those are the words of someone plannin' on losing. 
ROXANNE: -Turns her head to flash him a small smile.- But like i said not stickin' around to do your job for you.
ERIDAN: yeah -What he's agreeing to, it's not apparent. He's just chugging more faygo, eyes drooping heavily.- mmmmh
ERIDAN: ought to pick one you like or somethin
ROXANNE: Hm? 
ROXANNE: ....Are you just gonna' give me a gun? -How sleepy IS this guy.-
ERIDAN: -fingers are knotted into his hair as he gives himself a massage around the temples- ...fuckin 
ERIDAN: yes i am 
ERIDAN: it aint that goddamn complicated sometimes a request or a question is just simple 
ERIDAN: not wwarrantin the necessity to react like youre batshit insane 
ERIDAN: i already had to deal wwith one a you
ERIDAN: or else just drop it clearly attempts at generosity or concern at you humans just aint wworth it
ROXANNE: Sorry consider me a lil' hesitant around strangers lately. 
ROXANNE: Thanks for the offer though, ill take ya' up on it. -Shes putting down the harpoon gun and taking one of the automatics. sure the spear was cool, but this would be a lot more useful later.-
ERIDAN: -reaching under his desk again. This time pulling out a twinkie, peeling apart the wrapper.- least you got your senses about you -mutters.-
ROXANNE: -Tucks that gun away safe and sound in her sylladex now before turning to watch eridan snack.- 
ROXANNE: So... besides hand out guns an' chug shitty soda brands, what else do you get up to in here?
ERIDAN: i aint in here most instances 
ERIDAN: im out and about runnin the operation a course 
ERIDAN: the fuck else wwould i be 
ERIDAN: besides sittin square wwith my thumb up my ass
ERIDAN: dealin wwith local patrols and organizin scouts for supplies and shit a that nature
ROXANNE: -She shrugs.- 'Dunno what else you would have been doing thats why I asked. 
ROXANNE: -Did they get rid of any of the tech in this lab?-
ERIDAN: -grunts. Nah, they didn't. But they did disembowel the computers for various things. Mainly so they wouldn't be used.-
ROXANNE: -She doesnt care too much about them being gutted, she just wants to look at them. She takes a seat at one of the counter tops and fiddles with the ripped open technology.- Hah. Ya' know its kinda' nice to see that not too much has changed in the sense of the standard open to public campus computers.
ERIDAN: i wwouldnt fuckin knoww 
ERIDAN: i aint gone to no humanclad univversity
ROXANNE: You sure missed out then.
ROXANNE: Human uni. is where it is at.
ERIDAN: -just. Stuffs this whole twinkie in his mouth. Chews balefully.- sounds like its a baised drawwn conclusion but alright
ROXANNE: Oh it absolutely is but its also the damn truth. 
ROXANNE: You ever had a "Week of Welcome" wherever you studied?
ROXANNE: Its crazy let me tell you.
ERIDAN: -fixes her with a dubious frown.- a wweak of wwelcome sounds like the traditionalistic ritual of testin the constitution newwly ascended trolls 
ERIDAN: vvia drowwnin their heads in load gapers and seein if they resuscitate afterwwards
ERIDAN: guess humans got more spine to them than i thought initially
ROXANNE: ......Wowie. 
ROXANNE: Nah we didn't do any of that. 
ROXANNE: It was basically a week of clubs an' academic society groups tryin' to out-do each other with fun or dumb activities.
ROXANNE: You could pet like seven dogs by the library. 
ROXANNE: Or get free pizza or cup cakes for shaking a teachers hand.
ROXANNE: Although sometimes you got to pay $20 to smash a car with a sludge hammer but that was more often around finals.
ERIDAN: so 
ERIDAN: youre sayin there aint some kind of mutilation or murder plots invvolvved 
ERIDAN: not evven a little
ROXANNE: Not usually.
ERIDAN: evven the recreational shits got some bite to it 
ERIDAN: ...huh -sips faygo thoughtfully.-
ROXANNE: Yep. School is a place for petting dogs, makin' the grades, and getting sloshed on a thursday night when you know you have a 8am lecture hall.  
ERIDAN: suppose i relate on some level -hmphs, unimpressed.- 
ERIDAN: but nothin too solid
ROXANNE: Thats okay. Lets agree to leave it as a cultural difference I guess
ERIDAN: fairs fair -sloshes down the rest of this lukewarm faygo. Disgusting.-
ERIDAN: im eridan
ROXANNE: -If its so gross dont drink it.- 
ROXANNE: -She turns around on her stool.- Nice to meet ya'. 
ROXANNE: Im Roxanne.
ERIDAN: uh sure -He DOUBTS it's nice to meet him but accepts this introduction anyhow.- dunno if i ought to point it out or nothin ERIDAN: but you aint lookin like the battlefield type so ERIDAN: noww im wonderin wwhat the shit youre doin taggin along the assassination brigade for
ERIDAN: it aint exactly the equivvalent to pizza and pettin puppies or wwhatevver the fuck
ROXANNE: Ya' aint wrong there. 
ROXANNE: Its kind of a long story. But to summarize why I'm goin' along on this crazy shoot the duo president mission is to make sure the dad of my infant daughter doesnt get himself killed in the process. 
ROXANNE: Plus I got no weekend plans.
ERIDAN: -He understands these words individually and is trying to piece them together into something comprehensible.- so outta obligation to your mate aka the sire a your offspring
ROXANNE: Mmmm, not technically either of those things. 
ROXANNE: But close enough. 
ROXANNE: Derek is my ex, and we adopted a lil' girl while we were still together.
ERIDAN: so it wwas a beforan style cullin ritual 
ERIDAN: wwherein the twwo a you havve obligation ovver some helpless wward 
ERIDAN: all the wwhile ditchin wwhat i presume wwas a romantic entanglement 
ERIDAN: but its enough for you to pledge loyalty enough to head facefirst into the troll davvy jones locker of suicide missions for 
ERIDAN: ...
ERIDAN: wwho the hell is this guy anywway
ROXANNE: Bingo. 
ROXANNE: Derek Strider. You'd know him if you met him. 
ROXANNE: About yay tall -Gestures the height.- kinda' full of himself. 
ROXANNE: Triangle shades.
ERIDAN: oh 
ERIDAN: him 
ERIDAN: .... 
ERIDAN: i dont see it
ROXANNE: -Snrks.- Dont see what? Him being a dad or the relationship?
ERIDAN: wwhy the shit hes wworth you dyin for 
ERIDAN: you aint even invvolvved anymore
ERIDAN: the risks real possible just FYI
ERIDAN: but on top of losin a dad your grubs riskin losin its mom too aint it 
ERIDAN: wway to fuckin go the both a you
ROXANNE: Yeah i know. 
ROXANNE: But hey if we both die then i dont have to tell my baby that her daddy died. -Yes, just smile the real truth away.-
ROXANNE: Nah but... caring about someone can make ya' do crazy shit.
ROXANNE: We may not be together anymore but it doesnt change the fact that I still love him in other ways.
ERIDAN: crazy shit like a plea for attention if i evver fuckin saww it 
ERIDAN: hey blowwhole look wwhat im puttin at risk for you 
ERIDAN: -snorts- bet he dont appreciate it none
ROXANNE: -Snrks.- Even if it was a cry for attention, 
ROXANNE: Which its not. 
ROXANNE: He might appreciate it at least a little.
ROXANNE: Or at least feel damn well guilty when its all over, haha.
ERIDAN: not appreciativve enough to vvalue your grubs livvelihood it dont look like ERIDAN: smfh wwhat do i knoww 
ERIDAN: just got a general sense a wwhat a guardians supposed to behavve to compare it to 
ERIDAN: and i wwas reared by a goddamn skyhorse scrod rest his fuckin soul
ROXANNE: Ya' probably know just about as much about proper parenting as me, to be honest. 
ROXANNE: Still workin' on that whole "Perfect suburban mom" deal.
ROXANNE: But he cares about her a lot. I think he just got his head dragged into this mission.
ROXANNE: Keep hoping he's gonna' snap out of it but maybe its his feelings from how hes about to have another baby with his wife that makes him feel like he needs to save the world.
ERIDAN: -grunts- i guess 
ERIDAN: still a fuckin shame says i 
ERIDAN: pitys gonna only go so far and in the ends its gotta be you and your owwn hide 
ERIDAN: the shit youre invvested in or wwhatever 
ERIDAN: wwardin the grub 
ERIDAN: cant be a bad thing 
ERIDAN: but youre wwastin your fuckin energy expectin anybody to change for you wwho aint done shit to try 
ERIDAN: except ask you to be there and vvalidate you feelin needed or wwhat not 
ERIDAN: makes the cycle addictivve -sighs out, staring off. Time to break out more faygos.-
ROXANNE: Well damn.
ROXANNE: This is some impromptu broken relationship advice or what.
ERIDAN: no -turns to her to deadpan.- its advvice on survvivin past tomorroww
ROXANNE: Oh i know im gonna'.
ERIDAN: the credits goin to you then 
ERIDAN: or him rather 
ERIDAN: hes the one in the front lines aint he 
ERIDAN: suspect much -asks it like a question. Suspect much??-
ROXANNE: Yeah he is. 
ROXANNE: But while derek has a big talk I also know he has the skills to back it up. 
ROXANNE: And I'm mostly tagging along to provide immediate cover for the kill group.
ERIDAN: right... -Sure Jan. He believes you.-
ROXANNE: What ya' dont believe i can do it?
ERIDAN: wwhats it matter wwhat i think 
ERIDAN: im the guy leavvin my wweaponry lyin strewwn about wwilly nilly
ROXANNE: ...... -Chuckles.- 
ROXANNE: Fair point.
ERIDAN: -slorps a new faygo. This one a grape flavored one.- 
ERIDAN: doesnt matter wwhat i say 
ERIDAN: its you and your time and wwho youre puttin it towwards 
ERIDAN: hope you get it back at the end of the day is all
ERIDAN: -says this because he's totally judging you, Rox.-
ROXANNE: -Seriously, How many sodas is this guy going to drink.- 
ROXANNE: -She shrugs. He is free to judge away, the plan is stupid and risky and she knows that by going into it she might die. But if there was anything she could do to help minimize the chance of any more casualties on this suicide run it would be worth it.- 
ROXANNE: Ya' know we've talked a lot about me, but what about you Eridan? 
ROXANNE: I could be wrong but ya' dont seem like the type to be visiting earth to get a load of our, albeit currently dying, culture. Is it the soda brands that caught your attention?
ERIDAN: the only thing wworth a damn to come outta earth if you ask me -snarks but it lacks bite. He just shrugs.- 
ERIDAN: just so happens i got a free wweekend too
ROXANNE: Aww really? Thats all you enjoy about it?
ERIDAN: you got decent pastries i guess -Don't aww at him...-
ROXANNE: Pastries and soda. 
ROXANNE: Well. Everyone's gotta have their favorites.
ERIDAN: sos you 
ERIDAN: it just so happens yours got pointshades
ROXANNE: -HRGH.- 
ROXANNE: Pft... Nah.
ERIDAN: youd die for it so 
ERIDAN: wwheres the fuckin lie tee bee ach
ROXANNE: I'm not going to die for him, because we're not going to die. 
ROXANNE: Also like I said before you can care about someone without them being your favorite.
ERIDAN: guess youre right 
ERIDAN: wwith that logic im layin my life on the line for a mime
ROXANNE: Is the mime your buddy?
ERIDAN: hell no 
ERIDAN: he dont evven like me and frankly i dont care for his foot wwear
ERIDAN: wwho am i kiddin 
ERIDAN: at least its consistant -just B/ at himself.-
ROXANNE: Pfft. 
ROXANNE: Hilarious. Well I havent met this mime but ill be keepin' an eye out for what shoes he's wearing.
ERIDAN: -lowkey fist clenching memes.- youll see it
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