I never liked the way Dick Grayson treated Barbara Gordon when she was Batgirl and he was Robin. Every instance of him calling her “just a girl” or not taking her seriously angers me because she so desperately wanted to be taken seriously and prove that she could be Batgirl, only for a younger teenage boy to tell her A GROWN WOMAN these things. And people think it’s cute that “boy is mean to girl because he actually likes her” without seeing how much Barbara would have really hated that. And it is not that it is out of character for Dick to do that because of how he handled his relationship with Koriand’r later on. Batgirl and Robin’s time is so incredibly warped and as times goes on it’s either made cutesy or is seen as the good old times while sweeping the rest of it under the rug which is so unfair to Barbara Gordon. There’s also all the instances when Barbara is Oracle and Dick calls her Batgirl. Barbara a character who wanted respect both as Batgirl and Oracle and it saddens me that she wasn’t always called what she wanted to be called. Even in BoP when she gives her dialogue about how the batboys live in the past and she moved on to live a life that is fulfilling, Dick still is shown to know best. The boy who called her silly and called her just a girl knows her more than she knows herself. It angers me. And it angers me that people will turn around and try to justify it.

While it is true that initially, Barbara was closer to Bruce's age when she was first introduced, it was retconned sometime ago for her to be closer to Dick's age probably for the sole reason to form a romantic bond between the two.

I assume some writers meant to push some type of nostalgia between Dick and Barbara when he calls her Batgirl the same way Barbara can sometimes call him Boy Wonder. Regardless, that should be left as more of a nostalgic nickname between the two and not serious forms of addressing each other—at least, now that they've both been well into their adult years since the 80s (and a bit earlier for Barbara depending on what comic run you're pulling from).

I agree that characters like Dick, Jason, Tim, Damian and Cass aren't allowed to mature past their lives as kids/teenagers. Writers of DC LOVE keeping these poor characters stuck with their pasts. Its just overused and annoying at this point. I understand that some do it for every new generation of fans but let me just say, with the internet that's really not necessary. Stop assuming your audience has brains 2/3 sedimentary. If other forms of graphic novels (such as manga) can write compelling stories without having to retell the characters past in a 'fun new and exciting way' than so can comics.

As for Barbara, she deserves to be a part of the "Batfamily" but more importantly she deserves to be acknowledged as the leader of the BoP and treated so that the BoP team is her true priority. Oracle shouldn't be strictly attached to the Batfamily to be important. Barbara is so much more than that.