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obsessive-ego · 3 years

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Beetlejuice x reader (ambiguous pronouns)

Prompt: Beetlejuice starts digging around your things in the dead of night. Not having the most structured sleep schedule, you hear him, and in the state of sleep deprivation forget that Beetlejuice was staying over, this mistaking him for an intruder. Hilarity ensues.

It was late, nearing one am. You only noticed this because you realised you had been sat in the dark, which you swore it had just been light, on another video binge that ended up rabbit holeing through videos of countless interesting topics. You sighed at yourself and your lack of awareness when it came to the passage of time. You've done this exact thing many times before. You took off your headphones and set your sights on actually trying to sleep. With the lack of a bulky headset blocking your ears, however, sounds of rustling and movement echoed from outside your room. You stiffened, listening to it. Someone was definitely in your house, there was no mistaking it. Carefully, slowly, you slipped out of bed to grab the bat out from under your bed. An impulse buy, you only bought it because it had "Li'l Bitch" carved into the top and the mental image of "accidentally" imprinting that on someone with a whack made you laugh. While remembering this made you grin, it faded at you hearing a soft thud. Were they upstairs or downstairs? It was hard to tell with the closed door. How long had the intruder even been in the house? Focusing on the problem at hand, you crept to the door and slowly opened it, peeking around it. You cringed when it let out a creak, straining to hear if there was more movement.

Thankfully, whoever was present was not sneaking around upstairs, meaning your awareness of their presence was undetected. You could hear their movements clearer now, and they were clearly downstairs. You were so grateful to yourself for having the common sense to keep your more important things in your room. Creeping over to the stairs, you kept your eyes peeled for any movement in the halls. Throat dry in fear, knuckles white from the death grip you had on your bat, you descended. You made sure that the stairs wouldn't creak by tiptoeing along the sides, slowly putting pressure in each step before commiting. You did not want to alert the potential threat to your presence. They could be armed. They could have intent to kill. Sneaking up on them and knocking them out was the best bet, the cops can be called once they were subdued.

Reaching the bottom of the stairs, you worked out that the culprit was in the living room. You listened close, for any hint as to where exactly, before slowly inching closer for a glance. They were faced away for you, searching. It was dark, no lights on, so they wouldn't see a shadow if you snuck up. All you had to do was be quiet and get a hefty hit.

Taking in a deep breath, you advanced, bat at the ready. Your heart hammered loudly in your chest. Blood rushed in your ear as you got closer, eyes scanning over the vague silhouette for any clue that they'd turn. You froze as they straightened up.

"Nothing… Bet they keep all the juicy stuff hidden…"

So they were looking for things to steal! Taking another step closer, you got ready to swing. A creak of the floor betrayed you.

"Huh?"

Instincts kicking in, you swung the bat at their head as they turned. You put way too much force in it, in your panic. With a pained yell, the head went flying across the room, leaving a headless body standing in front of you. You stumbled back in shock, a scream getting caught in your throat. The body felt in the air for its lack of a head, to check it was really gone, before feeling around. In it's fumbling it turned on a lamp, and you instantly recognized who the body belonged to- Beetlejuice. That's right, he was staying over. He must have gotten bored while you "slept"...

"Yowzer! That hurt, doll, when'd you get so strong!?"

The demon cried out from somewhere across the room.

"Over here, dummy, come on!"

He made a series of whistling sounds in the hopes of getting his body to find him. It was fairly useless without the head so it had difficulty following the source of the sound. You watched Beetlejuice's body struggle to locate him as you clutched your chest, recovering from the scare. The anticipation leading up to the shocking conclusion really made the whole ordeal all the more frightening, and your sleep deprived state did nothing to help cool the adrenaline rush. It took a moment for you to realise Beetlejuice was calling your name.

"Will you help me out, already? I'm sorry for looking through your things, I won't do it again, maybe, just pick me up! It's dirty in here!"

You went over to the source of the complaints, a little amused at how you managed to hit his head directly into the fireplace that you never used. Who actually owns working fireplaces anymore, anyway? Dropping the bat, you reached in to pull the soot covered head of Beetlejuice out from there. He coughed his thanks, covering your shirt in more soot.

"Just slap me back on my neck, will you? You have no idea how annoying it is not having limbs."

You pondered the demand. He was looking through your things, and you'd quite like to know why, actually. Not to mention, a swift hit to the head was most likely not enough to teach the demon a lesson in privacy.

You gripped Beetlejuice's head by the hair, irritated by how that made him let out a purr, and shook him to get the dust and dirt off of him. He made an amusing, warbling yell, obviously not too fond of the gesture. His eyes rolled around in dizziness when you stopped. Beetlejuice groaned as you dumped his head onto the couch, tugging his body away from him by it's tie.

"Hey, hey hey, what are you doing?"

"I want to know exactly why you were looking through my things. You're not getting your body back until you tell me, and you better be honest."

Beetlejuice frowned, watching you as you turned the light on. You picked the bat back up, letting go of his body to turn back to Beetlejuice. You'll use your trust weapon to keep his body away from his head, if it tries anything.

"You won't last, you're supposed to be sleeping."

"You're right! That's why if you take too long, I'm going to go upstairs with your body and use it as a nice weighted blanket while you're stuck down here."

"WHAT?! Without me?"

You had to snicker at his dejected whine.

"Yes, that's what I said. Me and Dummy here are going to snuggle while you have to wait for the sun to rise, and probably longer seeing as I'm so tired. I'll definitely wake up late."

You couldn't help but speak in a taunting manner. It wasn't often you had the advantage over the demon, so it was a bit of a power trip when you did.

"You really know how to break down my walls, huh?"

You pushed the body away from you as it moved to grab at your head, as if it wanted to steal it for itself.

"Yep. Tick tock, you wouldn't want to have to wait for so long, right? So unable to do anything but stare at the unchanging surroundings…"

"Ok, ok, fine! I was looking for things you like, I… Well, it was supposed to be a surprise but… I wanted to get you a gift…"

You blinked at him in surprise. A gift? This had to be a joke, or some lie told to hide some other devious intent.

"... I said be honest."

"I am! I heard about the festival, holiday thingy that you breathers have, think it's called, uh, Valentide's Day, and I thought, well, you're my favourite breather, so… I'd get you a gift like people do."

You could feel your cheeks gaining colour as he spoke.

"It's Valentine's day… And typically, that's reserved for romantic gestures…"

"Romantic? Hmm…"

He looked down, pondering.

"Weeell, if you want me to put some petals on your bed too~"

You groaned, poking the body away from you with a bat as it tried to swipe your head again.

"Can I please have my body back, now? I did what you asked, even if it meant spoiling the surprise!"

Beetlejuice pouted at you, giving big pleading eyes in the hopes of you agreeing. You sighed, giving in. He had done as you asked, and you were too tired to milk the otherwise perfect opportunity to mess with him further. You dropped your bat, moving to pick him up.

His body had other plans, however. Hearing you unarm yourself, he lunged forward to snatch you up. You yelled in surprise, struggling in his grip.

"No, no, out 'em down you Dummy!"

Beetlejuice berated it to no avail. You squirmed in the hold, but it was just as strong as Beetlejuice always was. You were stuck.

"Help me out, Beets, there has to be something I can do to make him let go!"

From the face Beetlejuice made, it confirmed that there was. However, he seemed very hesitant to tell.

"I dunno, you might use it against me…"

That was true. Not even a might, having something to one up him would be lovely, and definitely put to good use. You weren't above lying, though.

"Of course not, Beetlejuice! Say, hey, if you tell me, I can still do the cuddling up plan- but with yoooou involved. Head and all!"

Jackpot, his face lit up at the suggestion.

"Really? You'd let me in your bed?"

"Yes! But I need to get out to reunite you to your body first."

Beetlejuice made a hesitant noise, waying up the options. In the end, the enticing over of getting to cuddle up with you was too good to pass up.

"Fine! But do not use it against me, I'll get you back for it if you do! Just… scratch at his ribs, not too hard, and he'll let go."

You nodded, shuffling in the body's hold to reach for them. You dig your nails in, raking them across it's ribs. The body shuddered before it let you out of its vice grip. You stumbled back, watching as it hugged his chest.

"Hold on, are you ticklish?"

"Are you?"

You squinted at Beetlejuice, who mimicked the action. With a tired sigh, you picked his head up and slapped it down onto his neck. He let out a pleased sigh, grabbing his head to turn it 360°, making sure it was firmly in place. You grinned when you noticed "Li'l Bitch" was imprinted on his cheek, and he squinted at you.

"Seriously, though, are you?"

Upon him clawing his hand at you, you kicked your bat up, grabbing it from the air smoothly. He got the message, holding his hands up in surrender. The fact you did that successfully was impressive enough to warrant a minor truce.

You turned away, heading towards the stairs.

"Try anything and I'll banish you. Also turn the lights off before you follow."

"You got it, boss!"

Crawling into bed after the whole ordeal could not have been more satisfying. The exhaustion hit you like a truck. Beetlejuice was quick to follow, diving under the covers before popping his head out, having gotten comfortable on top of you. You realised that he was likely not going to sleep, and he'd instead watch you. You were too sleepy to care, however, already dozing off. For a moment you wondered if he found anything to clue in on what gift to give to you… You decide you'd definitely look into finding in a gift, too, tomorrow.

...

I am hollering

This is beautiful

I cant Express that enough

My Only issue is that the tumblr app doesnt notify me when I get a submission lol

But like wow

I love the head and body bit so much, headless beej being a grabbing bastard 😩👌

Thank you SO much for sharing this

#my art blog is 3dimensionalcircles btw!#hehe free promo #beetlejuice #beetlejuice x reader #this isn't the most polished so sorry if you catch a typo or something pfpf #submission #just gonna add one more tag #musical beetlejuice x reader

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