#and those fuckers in the garden of recollection............
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how was playing hsr? was there anything that you liked in the game and the story?
ITS BEEN AMAZING AS EXPECTED!!!!!!!!! i actually havent played genshin in a while since starting it, i have no motivation to do the filler event while a perfectly good star rail is sitting there waiting to be played :')
but for mechanics, i love they have auto battle so you dont have to nessecarily sit there and invest in every little battle you gotta do....and i love that the resin (resin??) system is a lot more forgiving with a higher cap, lower cost, and allow for overflow...thats nice...i also love that the mc and starter units are very useful. im so emotionally attatched to the star rail crew so im glad they never have to leave my team !!!!
storywise im LOVING IT SO FAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i started playing it at the beginning of spring break 2 weeks ago and im almost all caught up!!! i went through belabog and penacony and now im just doing those leftover intermission main quests which im only now realizing i shouldve done before going to penacony LMAO
and of course.....danmarch....im so soft for them......and also i love sampo i cant wait to see what they do with him
#besides the star rail crew and sampo im not too attatched to anyone else#im very much a (what would happen in canon) type of player so the only units i REALLY want are himeko welt and imbibitor lunae#(and sampo)#everyone else i can go without#so this game is probably gonna be a lot better for my wallet#overall it just like it better than genshin minus the open world part#i like the story and characters...i like that you can play as bad guys while theyre still bad guys???? like blade and kafka???#cuz in genshin you always gotta redeem them somehow first before theyre playable#not here hueheuhe#also i love that they actually kill off playable characters#(spoilers from here on out)#i know were supposed to be all sad for fireflys death but honestly.......i didnt care about her too much LMAO#i was actually a little annoyed for the secret base part because her base was SO FUCKING DEEP IN ENEMY TERRITORY#i was like (damn bitch how far away is this shit??!)#that by the time we got to the emotional part i was just mad#i never liked characters where the game tries to like....force you to care about them#and its implied you have some super close relationship ESPECIALLY when you havent known them long#now if march died that would be a whole different story#but firefly??? i mean rip but i didnt really know her#im loving the penacony quest so far though#any setting where its like a place of mind tricks and gambling and spending money and sin is always so scary to me#especially the dream within a dream within a dream shit#the mind fuck aspect is always a good plot that i enjoy#i also love that theyre not afraid to upgrade units#like we have dan heng and the dragon dan heng#so characters arnt stagnent forever#everyday i hope we one day get to see a 5-star secret power march#cuz that girl has some shit going on i swear#i just did her luofu memory quest#and those fuckers in the garden of recollection............
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When you think of grunge, do you picture a bunch of long-haired White guys in plaid shirts, singing about teenage angst and self-loathing? Time to expand that viewpoint. Standing above them all should be Tina Bell, a tiny Black woman with an outsized stage presence, and her band, Bam Bam. It’s only recently that the 1980s phenom has begun to be recognized as a godmother of grunge.
This modern genre’s sound was, in many ways, molded by a Black woman. The reason she is mostly unknown has everything to do with racism and misogyny. Looking back at the beginnings of grunge, with the preconception that “everybody involved” was White and/or male, means ignoring the Black woman who was standing at the front of the line.
Bam Bam was formed as a punk band in 1983 in Seattle. Bell, a petite brown-skinned spitfire with more hairstyle changes than David Bowie, sang lead vocals and wrote most of the lyrics. Her then-husband Tommy Martin was on guitars (the band’s name is an acronym of their last names: Bell And Martin), Scotty “Buttocks” Ledgerwood played bass, and Matt Cameron was on drums. Cameron would leave the band in its first year and go on to fame as the drummer for Soundgarden and Pearl Jam. But he paid homage to his beginnings by wearing a Tina Bell T-shirt in a photoshoot for Pearl Jam’s 2017 Anthology: the Complete Scores book.
“For some reason a couple of skinheads are up front, calling her [the N-word] And all of the sudden, Bell grabs a microphone stand and she starts swirling it around her head like a lasso… She swung that fuckin’ thing around her head and about the fourth time, she smashed that son of a bitch.”
Bam Bam’s sound straddled the line between punk and something so new that it didn’t have a name yet. Their music combined a driving, thrumming bass line; downtuned, sludgy guitars; thrashy, pulsing drums; melodic vocals that range from sultry to haunting to screamy; and lyrics about the existential tension of trying to exist in a world not designed for you. The band’s 1984 music video for their single “Ground Zero” is low-budget, but Bell’s charisma seeps through.
“She was fucking badass. That’s all there is to it. She was amazing as a performer. I’ve only seen one White male lead singer command the stage in a similar way that Tina Bell did, and that was Bon Scott of AC/DC,” says Om Johari, who attended Bam Bam shows as a Black teenager in the ’80s and who would go on to lead all-female AC/DC cover band Hell’s Belles.
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Christina King, a Seattle scenester who was close friends with Bell from 1984 until the early ’90s, says the singer’s talent was obvious. But she believes a lot of people dismissed Bell as a gimmick.
Among those attending their shows: Future members of grunge bands like Nirvana (Kurt Cobain did a stint as a Bam Bam roadie), Soundgarden, Alice in Chains, and Pearl Jam.
“I remember one person saying to me that they didn’t get ‘the whole Black girl singer thing,’ it just didn’t fit whatever they were into,” says King. “They were too ahead of their time.”
Bam Bam came into being in an era when hundreds of underground clubs, taverns, bars, and social halls — anywhere that you could cram in a band — were within the Seattle city limits. Bam Bam played almost all of them, and often to big crowds: The Colourbox, Crocodile Lounge, Gorilla Gardens, Squid Row — just to name a few.
Among those attending their shows: Future members of history-making grunge bands like Nirvana (Kurt Cobain did a stint as a Bam Bam roadie), Soundgarden, Alice in Chains, and Pearl Jam. Not to mention all the other people, mostly White and male, who would become prime targets for music labels trying to market this new sound.
Bell “already possessed everything they were trying to attain. She had a truer rock and roll spirit than almost any of those guys in that town. Everything they tried to do, she naturally was,” says Ledgerwood, still a loyal bandmate.
One Seattle club, The Metropolis, became “like our fucking living room,” says Ledgerwood. It was also the site of an overtly racist verbal assault against Tina Bell.
“For some reason a couple of skinheads are up front, calling her [the N-word],” Ledgerwood recalls. “And all of the sudden, Bell grabs a microphone stand and she starts swirling it around her head like a lasso… She swung that fuckin’ thing around her head and about the fourth time, she smashed that son of a bitch… She nailed that fucker right in the temple of his head. Split like a melon. And the other guy next to him caught it too, they go down, and we’re like, ‘What the fuck?’”
Ledgerwood says that after going backstage for a while to regroup, Bell came back “and put out the most blistering set of our fucking career.”
This could easily be an anecdote about Bell’s power, her resilience, and willingness to fight back against oppressive forces. But it’s also a story about the cost of being a Black woman who does something that some people don’t expect or approve of.
“She’s being pulled out of her zone because somebody is acknowledging how the rest of the world can see her,” says Johari, empathizing with the star rocker. “And even to react to it by picking up a microphone and smashing someone in the face, that means that that incident cost her not only that moment it takes to get back into the song, but the whole [effects of her] action will last for weeks.
“She’ll replay that over and over and over and over again. And then the people she sees that were there when it happened, they’re gonna come up to her and they’re gonna forget everything that she’s saying, all the stuff that she had did, and they’re only going to focus on, ‘I was at that show where you knocked a dude in the head for calling you an N-word,’” Johari says. “It has nothing to do with her artistry. But it reminds her of the way in which she has to be prepared, just in case it happens again.”
King remembers Bell also felt that some of the other men in the band’s changing lineup failed to treat her as an equal partner: “She’s getting that from her own band members — what do you think audience people are like?”
A European tour in the late ’80s gained Bam Bam international fans, but ended after Bell and Martin split up, and Bell was caught in an immigration enforcement dragnet in the Netherlands.
When they returned to the Pacific Northwest, Bam Bam continued playing shows until 1990, when Bell abruptly quit as they were packing up to head to the studio in Portland, Ore.
“She had just had enough,” Ledgerwood says. “For almost eight years she had almost literally eviscerated herself for the audience.”
But that work never resulted in the national recognition they deserved.
“Grunge, whatever that means, is being identified as from your community, your colleagues, your sound that you were a participant in help shaping, and you’re not even mentioned in any of it.”
“Sometimes you need to be a little bit of an asshole to protect yourself. And Bell wasn’t much of an asshole,” Ledgerwood adds. “She was a pure-hearted person and had a really hard time believing that people couldn’t accept her over something as stupid as race.”
Bell didn’t just quit the band, she withdrew from music completely, says her son, Oscar-winning documentary filmmaker TJ Martin. Not out of resentment, he adds, but perhaps to escape the painful reminders that the music she helped pioneer was now earning other bands multimillion-dollar record contracts.
“Grunge, whatever that means, is being identified as from your community, your colleagues, your sound that you were a participant in help shaping, and you’re not even mentioned in any of it,” Martin says. “I can’t even fathom what that would feel like for it to be sort of spit back in your face with such frequency.”
Ledgerwood believes Bell died of a broken heart. But when Bell died alone in her Las Vegas apartment in 2012, the official cause of death listed was cirrhosis of the liver. She had struggled with alcohol and depression. Her son says the coroner estimated her time of death as a couple weeks before her body was discovered. She was 55 years old.
The things that could have told Tina Bell’s story in her own voice are lost. Martin arrived in Las Vegas to find that the contents of his mother’s apartment — except for a DVD player, a poster, and a chair — had been thrown away. All of her writings — lyrics, poems, diaries — along with Bam Bam music, videos, and other memorabilia — went in the trash without her family even being notified.
If you think you were in Seattle in the ’80s, in the grunge scene, and you don’t remember Tina Bell and Bam Bam, you probably weren’t really fucking there.
“I couldn’t help draw a parallel between her not being respected and seen in the first chapter of her life, as the front person of a punk band, and then even in death being disrespected and not being seen for the merits of the life she lived,” says Martin.
Bell’s death is also an indictment of the way she was written out of her own story. The way grunge’s almighty gatekeepers chose to look through her instead of at her. Grunge became the domain of alienated young White men in flannel shirts, and Tina Bell didn’t fit the narrative they were trying to sell.
“Black herstory can suffer immense amounts of erasure if somebody is not brave enough to ensure that women get counted,” Johari says.
To many of those who were part of the scene at the time, the amnesia seems intentional. Ledgerwood brings up the seminal history of Seattle’s grunge era, Everybody Loves Our Town. In it, the author refers to Bam Bam as a three-piece instrumental band mainly notable because Matt Cameron was the drummer. Tina Bell isn’t even mentioned.
“How in the hell would he have a recollection of how great Bam Bam and its drummer was, and not this unbelievably beautiful woman, this firecracker, this explosive rock and roll goddess?” Ledgerwood asks. “Even if he thought she sucked, to not remember the only Black woman on the whole fuckin’ scene is — well, it’s like that old joke about the ’60s: If you think you were in Seattle in the ’80s, in the grunge scene, and you don’t remember Tina Bell and Bam Bam, you probably weren’t really fucking there.”
You can listen to more of Bam Bam’s music on this Spotify playlist. A vinyl album with the band’s songs is coming out this year on Bric-a-Brac Records.
#Alice in Chains#Bam Bam#black history#black women#black women in rock#grunge#Kurt Cobain#music#Nirvana#Pearl Jam#rock#Seattle#Soundgarden#Tina Bell#women in rock#women's history#80s
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Sugar Cane Nymph (G.D.)
Sugar cane nymph (G.D.)
disclaimer-> i’m colombian so english is obviously NOT my first language. i’m fluent and generally have non-terrible grammar but I usually just write academic stuff in english. i have only ever written fiction in my mother language before this so please bare with me while i get used to this.
this took a while to write omg it wasn’t supposed to be this long, anyways enjoy and PLEASE PRETTY PLEASE let me know what you guys think about it?💓💓🎊🎊
TELL ME IF YOU WOULD LIKE A PART TWO
summary: Grayson meets his mom’s new neighbor after an unexpected for legged visitor ivades Lisa’s Garden.
word count: +5k
warnings: some minor swearing, a whole buch of flustered grayson and hopefully a bit of humor? also i did not proof-read this sorry
Poor Grayson. For the millionth time that night something was disturbing his peaceful sleep. First the frogs and now his mom chooses this moment to do laundry.He thought half asleep. His hazy mind couldn’t for the life of him imagine any other reason for the incessant rumbling that was currently penetrating the walls of his tiny bedroom. He was mad. All of that crunching and crashing outside had taking him out of his amazing dream.
Oh, and was it an amazing one. So beautiful, just like her. He didn’t even know her name yet her image had managed to plague his every waking moment and now it seemed his slumber too. Not that he minded though, his dream had brought them closer.
He needed his sleep because he needed to wake up early, otherwise he would miss it, miss her. He had discovered her on his first morning run ever since coming back home. He always thought that Jersey had the prettiest countryside in all of North America and now he was sure of it. How could it not be with such a gorgeous nymph galoping around bareback on top her trusty steed. She was out there every morning at exactly 5:50 a.m.
Dammit. When had he became such a sap? Grayson knew he was attractive and he definitely knew how to use it. He had never encountered trouble wooing the ladies before. But this one, oh this one was different. There was something about her, he didn’t even knew her name but he just felt a certain way when he was around her. Well, more like spying behind a particularly dense bush that surrounded the little clearing where she ended her ride every morning. And that he had found on pure coincidence . If you could count trying to conspicuously keep up with a galloping horse for a quarter of mile as coincidence, that is. In his defense he just couldn’t let her get away, it was like she was pulling him without even knowing.
Each morning she would ride up there and he would be waiting behind the bush to watch the show. He could hear it’s powerful hoves before he could devise the big black stallion. Even her horse was different. It had a beautiful shinny black coat that the women at his mom’s beauty salon would envy. It’s mane and tale cascaded down his body in actual curls. Just like hers. He had never seen a horse that didn’t have straight hair.
It was sort of funny, one of the first things he noticed about the mysterious girl was her long and lucious curly hair. And she looked so in sync with the beast. With the dark curls and big brown eyes they almost looked like family.
She was short thing, as he noticed when he saw her stading next to the horse for the first time. He reckoned she would reach to his chest or his shoulders, at best. Her thick thighs hugged the animal’s torso right before she jumped off its back, squatting on her landing which made her delectable ass stretch her jeans. It all looked pretty profesional and innocent, still, he couldn’t help but imagine those beautiful legs wrapping around his waist while his big hads supported that delicious bottom.
Was he seriously getting exited at a half asleep memory or was it just morning wood?
He ignored that thought and kept his eyes closed, continuing with his hazy recollection.
Their conection was amazing, it was just her and her beast. She didn’t use a saddle or tack. She simply spoke to it, like one would another human being, and then she would scratch it’s neck. After that the thousand poud animal did everything she asked. It reared and bowed at her comand and, sometimes, she would let her hair down and they would spin and jump around almost like they were dancing.
No matter how many times he hid behind that bush to watch them, Grayson was in awe at every single thing she did. To him, she was completely mesmerizing.
So mesmerizing, in fact, that he could never bring himself to step out from behind his reliable bush to say hi. She seemed nice enough, surely she wouldn’t think he was some sort of creepy stalker, right? Except, at this point, he kind of was. But his little nymph didn’t need to know that.
Giving up on sleep he decided that if his mom felt the need to do the laundry two days in a row he better find a way of his own of being productive. But upon opening his eyes he was surprised to be greeted by darkness and those stupid frogs chirping outside. He tapped around until his long fingers got a grasp on his cellphone and squinted when the damned thing nearly blinded him with it’s brightness.
Then suddenly the laundry room was shaking again.
“The fuck” he groaned sleepily.
When his eyes finally adjusted to the light emanating from the screen of his Iphone he let out another groan, silently cursing the digital clock that read 4:25 a.m.. His alarm would be ringing in less than an hour for his morning run and he was super tired because some frogs had decided to serenade him until one in the morning. How come they aren’t sleeping yet?
Then there was that rumbling again. But when he realized that his mechanical roommate would be empty of dirty clothes at such unholy hour he began to worry. It’s not like the house was near the street, whatever or whoever was causing all that ruckus had to be in the property. He crept out of his room barefoot trying to be conspicuous and stealthy, even though the cold floor was torturing his toes.
He reached the front door after a quick stop at the kitchen to grab his mother’s big trusty iron frying pan in case he needed to attack. He made a mentan note to not leave everything that could be a potential weapon inside his building shed next time.
After taking a fortifying breath he grabbed the doorknob and turned it as delicately and silently as man his size could manage.
At first glance nothing on the porch seemed out of the ordinary, but when he turned the lights on he noticed it. An overturned plantpot which used to contain an colorful flower that, according to his mom, was an exotic plant that her friend had brought her from her vacation in the caribbean. His mom couldn’t stop talking about her colorful little flower when they showed her her new garden and how she was going to give it a special place in it. And now some rascal had savagely munched on it leaving only the dying stems amongst the dirt.
Suddenly the early morning was eerily silent again. Grayson tried to slow his breathing while straining to hear anything tha would give away the position of the invader. His heart was just about to beat out of his chest, the house was in the middle of nowhere, anything could be out there.
When he finally heard something he couldn’t believe his ears. High pitched and clearly irritated he barely recognized it.
Was that a neigh?
He followed the sound and finally got his answer upon glancing at Lisa’s Garden. The animal that appeared tu be stuck near one of the flower beds looked like a horse, kind of. It had a mane, a tail, four hooves, pointy ears and it was distinctly neighing, everythig pointed that it was a horse. Except for the fact that it couldn’t be any taller than three feet. It seemed he was in presence of a miniature horse.
Quickly running to his building shed he grabbed his diagonal pliers to cut the wire that had most likely trapped his hoof. But when he came back to help the little guy found him with his head deep into the nearest flower pot casually having a 5 a.m. flowery snack.
“Hey! Stop that!” he yelled trying to separate the little beast from it’s colorful victim. “YOU LITTLE FUCKER” Grayson yelled when the animal actually bit him for trying to take away his meal. Weren’t horses suposed to be vegetarian? Well if it liked flowers so much who’s to say it didn’t have other bizarre tastes... like fucking human flesh.
Waking up from all the noise Lisa walked outside to see her 6ft tall 200lb son wrestling a mini horse for a pot of half munched flowers. And she knew their equine visitor very well.
Grayson looked up from his struggle to see his mom walking out of the house with her phone in hand. He looked at her pleadingly and she just chuckled.
“Don’t worry sweetie I called his owners, Emperor’s mom is coming to pick him up as we speak” She told him.
“Wait you actually know where he came from?!” He let go of the animal and marched up to the woman comfortably clad in whool robe and warm slippers while he was out there shirtless and barefoot, hair stuck in every direction, trying to defend their home.
And of course in that moment his beloved brother decided to join in the fun from his bedroom window. Ethan let put a loud snort at his twin’s dishiveled appearance.
“Dude, what happened to you?” he asked in between laughs.
“Shut the fuck up E!” Grayson yelled looking up to his brother. “It could’ve been a murderer or some shit” At that Lisa couldn’t contain herself anymore and let put a loud laugh. She walked towards him with his coat in her hands that she had retrieved while the boys bantered.
“Oh realx sweetie! I don’t think you can die from cuteness overload” She paused while Grayson snatched his coat and glanced at the small black horse. to speak to it in a baby voice. “Ain’t that right Emperor?”
He put on his coat over his otherwise naked torso and and ran his hands through his unruly hair, exasperated. His mom speaking to the little monster briefly reminded him of his beautiful nymph and how her horse actually seemeyto listen, unlike this urchin that had breakfast on his mom’s flowers. He sneered at the animal before speaking.
“So you know the owners, ma?”
“Yeah, they’re sugarcane farmers. Our neighbors up north.”
“Up north? That’s dairy farm?” Grayson replied maliciously. Of course it would be dairy people that would own this mini horse devil. It just made sense.
Lisa just chuckled again at the grave look on Grayson’s face. Ethan just observed carefully from above how Emperor finished a pot of tiny purple flowers and was stretching his little neck trying to reach the next one containing daisies. Or at least he thought that’s what those were, either way it was simply hilarious.
“That’s north of the road, Gray. I’m talking about north of the property, they grow sugarcane organically. ” She explained exitedly.
“Oh... well whoever they are they better come get their poor animal soon.”
“They are already on the way, I just sent Denisse a text” She replied sternly, her sons could be the biggest men-child sometimes. “And even though they’re not vegan, I can assure you they take real good care of their animals.” Since Grayson didn’t seem all that convinced she continued, “Especially their horses, Denisse’s daughter has wall full of horsemanship thophies and first place ribbons, that girl spends hours everyday tending them.”
“Well apparently not enough” He grumbled brooding. “This one is clearly not that educated”
“Oh, Emperor is just a bit... energetic”
Oh hell no. She was actually gonna deffend it.
“ENERGETIC?!” He snapped. “ He ate your exotic flower and destroyed the garden! He’s a monster in a small package!”
“Gray it’s okay. And you’re exaggerating he didn’t destroy anything he just turned a few flower pots.”
“What about you exotic kayacka or whatever it’s called!” He kept on yelling. “HE ANNIHILATE IT”
Grayson was seething at this point. He loved animals and nature, he had gone vegan for God’s sake. But this was just too much, nature had basically trampled him in the last 12 hours. First the god forsaken frogs screaming their slimy little lungs out kept him up half of the night and now this!
This annoying piece of horse flesh had not only awoken him at the fucking asscrack of down, but it had also destroyed the garden he had busted his back to buid for Ma, who was currently laughing at his missery. And as if that wasn’t enough he was more than likely going to miss his secret appointment with his beautiful nymph.
“It’s called a cayena and he didn’t do it intentionally , Gosh, calm down” She pinned him with a stare “And it’s not that big of a deal, there’s more where that one came from I’m sure Denisse wouldn’t mind. Plus her daughter will more than likely begg to help picking up this mess, like I said she always looks out for the horses” She pursed her lips starting to get a annoyed at his irrational fury. “As mother would, she’s always picking up her childs messes”
“Well if she is such a great horse mom, how come her child is a freakin flower eating tornado” Grayson replied grudgingly, feeling like a scolded child for something he didn’t even do. Was he seriously talking about this horse like it was a person?
In the middle of his ire he looked down. Now that the sun was starting to illuminate the early morning he could see it had a kinda nice chesnut color and his beady ayes were staring eagerly at the daisies, that were just a few centimeters out of reach. If it hadn’t been such a nightmare Grayson could almost see himself looking for his allergy pill after petting the cute tiny thing. But it had messed with his garden and managed to get stuck, now he was going to have to ruin the chicken wire to cut him free. So no, Emeperos wasn’t all that cute anymore and after looking at the redish bite mark on his hand he definitely didn’t want to pet it. Lisa’s voice interrupted his musings.
“Listes, go put on you shoes, get yourself some breakfast and try to calm down. Denisse’s daughter shouldn’t be more than a few minutes away, I’ll look after him in the meantime”
“Oh no no, I’m gonna have a word with this chit and she’s gonna fix this immediately.”
Lisa was about to stop Grayson’s angry rambling until she spotted a rider and horse closing in on the house from the north trail.
“I mean, who the hell does she think she is? Letting her animals trample around and how long tilll-“
“Oh my Gosh! I’m so sorry Mrs Dolan I can’t believe he’s done this again.” A female voice rung melodically behind him accompanied by the resounding thudding of heavy hooves on grass. “Emperooor” the voice groaned “ what was it this time?”
Grayson knew that voice, and even if he had never heard her giving soft commands to her intimidating black stallion he would have recognized the feeling she stirred in him. That fluttering on the left side of his chest, the earthquake of butterflies in his stomach, that familiar sense of calmness that only her could bring him.
Lisa´s voice brought him back from his momentary day dream.
“Well son it looks like your wish came true” she said so only he could hear and the raised her voice to greet the girl rapidly approaching them on horseback. “(Y/N) , sweetie, hello!”
Grayson turned around utterly speechless. Astounded by her beauty and awed by the mere sight of her as she dismounted gracefully from the familiar black stud, who was actually saddled this time.
She stepped away from the huge beast and walked towards where they were standing near the garden. With every step closer that she took Grayson felt his lungs closing up on him. What was I supposed to say to her, again? The mini horse, right.
“I’m so sorry Mrs. Dolan. I don't know what to do with him anymore, ever since we moved up here he seems to find new ways to scape stalls and squeeze to fences daily” (Y/N) kept babbling out her sincere apologies while she come to hug the older woman whose garden had been vandalized by her favorite Shetland.
“(Y/N) I’ve told you a hundred times it’s Lisa, and don't worry about it I understand you mother is always telling me how hard you try to keep Emperor in check” She replied glaring slightly at Grayson whose jaw had fallen slightly ajar, she elbowed him discreetly bringing him back from whatever dreamland he was in. “Can't speak for the big man here though, he was a little distressed earlier”
As if he wasn't having a hard enough time (Y/N) shiny browns eyes peered up at him shyly stilling his lungs once again, and a lovely blush spread on her chubby cheeks. He followed the rosy trail with his eyes to the top of her round breasts wondering how far down her body would it reach. And when she spoke softly to him, he was a goner.
“Oh... I’m so sorry, I promise I will fix it up right away” When he didn't reply she added “I'm not as great as Lisa but I’m a pretty decent gardener, I swear its gonna look brand new” Gosh, this was embarrassing. He was so handsome and she has just let her mini-horse ruin his mother's garden.
Lisa’s elbow once again spooked him out of his catatonic state.
“Oh don’t be modest, I bet it’s gonna look better than before. Right, Gray?” Seeing the look in his eyes, she quickly decided that (Y/N) would have a little help fixing her plants. “Sweetie, I know you've made good friends with Cameron but I don't think you've met my sons before”
“No ma’am, I don't think I've had the pleasure” (Y/L) replied in a low voice very unlike herself.
“Okay this is Grayson and that nosy one with his head stuck out the window is his twin brother Ethan” (Y/N) glanced in the direction Lisa was pointing and sure enough there was buzz cut head sticking out the second floor window with a smirk plastered all over his angular face, ready to yell a greeting to his brother’s dream girls. Gray had described her so many times with so much detail that it was scary but it also allowed him to tell right away when he saw the curly haired girl atop the black horse.
“Why good morning Miss Horsey Neighbor (Y/L) it's a pleasure to make your acquaintance” Ethan yelled with a flirty smirk that he knew was sure to infuriate his twin.
“The pleasure is all mine, good sir” (Y/N) replied with a laugh, following along on his joke. Ethan seemed like a funny guy, she could see them becoming friends. The other brother though, they had the same sharp jawline and handsome features, but Grayson’s intense stare was definitely something else. She felt intimidated yet...exited?
Grayson stuck his hand out dumbly trying to get her attention back from his brother.
“I’m distressed and it’s okay, I wasn't Grayson” he vomited his words while trying to produce a smile that ended up looking like a grimace. (Y/L) offered him a blushy smile back none the less.
“It's a pleasure Distressed”
“Huh? Oh, fuck!” Nice job champ let her think you're fucking retarded “ it’s Grayson! I’m Grayson and was not distressed. I was just um...” He trailed off looking to his mom for help bur she merely shrugged “I was uh... worried! For the mini! Poor little guy just wanted a snack and ended up stuck in the chicken wire.”
He stuttered and stumbled trough his explanation but (Y/N), who was usually very perceptive, was still so embarrassed and flustered that she didn't notice he was lying.
“Okay. So, he shouldn’tbe snacking on flowers, anyways, he knows that” (Y/N) mumbled walking towards Emperor who had stopped struggling towards the white daisies and was now waiting for attention from his favorite human. “Alrighty pal, what did you get yourself into” She kneeled on the ground and started inspecting Emperor’s little hoof stuck on the wire. She tried to pull it out but it was too tight, the wire had tu be cut.
Meanwhile Grayson stared amazed at how the little horse devil had turned into horse putty in (Y/N)’s hands. His ears pointed towards and he rubbed his furry neck on her arm looking for scratches. No sign of the Shetland that had rudely attacked him earlier. He looked down at his hand and noticed that the bite mark was barely visible now, maybe Emperor wasn't that bad after all. Maybe.
“It’s too tight if we don't cut the wire he could hurt himself” (Y/N) announced looking up towards Lisa but the taught about it and directed her glance towards her son, who already had a cutting plier in his hand. “Do you think I can borrow that?”
“Yeah, sure, here you go” He was about to hand her the tool when Lisa widened her eyes at him at pointed her chin to the girl crouched con her garden. “Actually, let me do it” He corrected, kneeling down right next to her so that his strong shoulder thighs brushed against her blue jeans. He heard vaguely a big impatient snort behind but paid no mind to de large stallion that stood where (Y/N) had tied his reigns to the garden fence. The thing was so big it could probably pull the fence right off the soil, but instead stood patiently waiting for his master.
“I live in farm y’know I think I can manage a pair of pliers” She replied slightly annoyed that he wouldn't hand her the damned thing.
“Oh, don’t mind him honey he just loves playing with his tools” Lisa pitched in from above them. Grayson prayed nobody noticed his flushed face, but his nymph was deliciously close to him for the first time. Never before he had had the chance of perceiving her intoxicating scent, it was sweet almost like melted sugar right before it turns into caramel.
“I don’t play, ma! I build stuff” He looked up at his mother with a look half annoyed/half pleading. “Besides, I’m sure you're more than capable of cutting some measly chicken wire, I just thought you could keep him calm so that-”
“Oh my God! You're totally right.”
“I am?”
“OF COURSE, he could run around as soon as he's free and continue to dismantle this poor place. Good thinking, Grayson”
Was that even his name she just pronounce? He didn't remember ever sounding so good.
“Yup, yeah. That's it” Yeah I totally wasn't trying to show off for you, nymph.
(Y/N) resumed scratching Emperor with one hand while the other pushed on his neck to give Grayson as much room to cut the wire as possible. Since the kids seemed to be getting along quite nicely Lisa decided to make herself scarce.
“Well guys I’m gonna get inside and make some breakfast” She received two distracted hums and with that she left, not without throwing a pointed glance up at Ethan who immediately stuck his head back inside.
A few minutes later Emperor was a free and happy Shetland. Since he had already eaten, clearly, she decided she could get a head start on the mess the mini had made before riding back home for breakfast. She attached a lead-rope she had brought to the his halter, that he was miraculously still wearing, and tied him to the fence. Grayson just watched her, still kneeling by the dirt bed, she moved so naturally between the mess.
“I’m so sorry, really. For the life of me I have no idea how he came to eat flowers on the first place, I will bring over some seeds later but I’m gonna start cleaning this now, do you have some gardening tools I can borrow?” She was a little breathless after spurting out all of that, she was so nervous now that they were alone.
He got up and dusted his sweatpants.
“Sure, they are in my building shed” He replied puffing out his already beefy chest, his building shed was his pride and joy. “Just let me grab my boots real quick”
“Oh that’s okay I ca-” but he was already running inside.
A few minutes later after running a hand through his hair numerous times to tame his bedhead in front of the living room mirror, they were walking a bit closer than necessary to the shed.
“So, you like building a lot?” At that Grayson put on full display his million dollar smile.
“You could say that” He said looking around the shed for the gardening toolbox.”I build my mom that garden, I mean me and my brother did it but he was more like an.. assistant” Grayson could have swooned when he heard her laughter but instead focused on grabbing the box from the top shelf.
“Are you kidding? I could have sworn that was made by a professional?” She replied, seemingly impressed while they walked back.
“Why thank you, n- (Y/N)” He put the box down next to the first overturned plant pot “I appreciate that” Oh he appreciated it, alright.
“You know, you don't need, it was my horse after all” she sat criss- cross and started rummaging trough the box.
This was it, Grayson needed to pull his shit together if he wanted to make a good first impression on this gorgeous nymph that was eagerly staring up at him, waiting for an answer that his dumbass was unable to produce. With his shaking hands conveniently hidden inside his pockets, he stared confidently into her deep brown eyes and pulled his most charming smile.
And then they got to work. All coquettish smiles, blushing faces and casual hand brushings. They talked about building, horses, video games and even the process of cultivating high quality sugar cane without using pesticides. Grayson was over the moon being the sole focus of her attention, he had waited so long for this. He watched as she pulled away from her face the rebel curls that scaped from her ponytail wishing he could run his hands through the luscious strands and wondering if her round cheeks would be as soft as they looked if he were to touch them with his rough fingertips. He was so immersed in her that didn't realize that their work was done when they picked up the last of Emperors victims, the cayenne on the porch.
Standing on the recently clean porch steps they took a minute to admire their hard work. Or at least for Grayson they were to admire her.
“Well, this is it, thank you so much for you help Gray, you didn't have to” Did she just called him by his nickname? He had to be dreaming.
“It’s okay” he murmured observing how she had to crane her neck up to look at him, she was such a shorty yet when she spoke she appeared larger than life. She was simply amazing. “Time flies when you're having fun” He replied while they started walking towards the horses that were snorting impatiently.
“It was kinda fun, wasn't it?” she untied the big black horse and with one hand she held Emperor’s lead rope while the other pulled on the saddle Horne making for a swift effortless mount. Grayson stood a few steps away looking at the stallion curiously. “You can come closer, Spirit is a perfect gentleman, he likes firm pats like this” He smiled at her demonstration and brought his own much larger right hand to Spirit’s thick neck and let his left one rest cheekily above her knee.
“Spirit” he tested the name on his tongue “Is that his name?” he was looking up at her, for a change, and its was making her breath speed up.
“Well his registered name is actually Indomitable Spirit, my grandma rescued his mom with a poachers arrow on her side” (Y/N) cringed at the memory of the beautiful mare covered in blood “She didn’t have any hoseshoes and her teeth looked like they had never been floated, she was skittish around people... but not as much as the tipycal wild horse. It was like she was scared but she still wanted something from us. Then we realized it was because she was heavily pregnant, it only took us a couple of days to figure out she was close to due date. A month later she gave birth to the most adorable foal with a coat as black as onyx stone” Grayson basked in the glow of her radiant smile remembering how her horse came to this world. And when her face fell, his did too.“It was a difficult labor and she wasn't fully healed yet from her old wounds. The blood loss was fatal, she was too weak to even stand but she pushed through until she was done and the she just closed her eyes and never opened them again. Later on we confirmed she was a mustang so we named him in her honor. You know, most pregnant mares are nightmares, but not her, it was like she knew we would take care of her baby.” She paused at the dreamy look on his face ”Sorry, you probably didn't need the whole pony tale story, I blabber a lot sometimes... a lot of times, actually.”
“No its fine its fine,” he replied hurriedly “I love it, I mean, the story- its quite beautiful,”
“Glad you liked it” She blushed again and Grayson could have pulled her down from the saddle right then and there to cover her cute ass face with kisses, but he contained himself and tried to focus on what she was saying. “Again I’m so sorry about the garden”
“Actually, now I’m looking forward to Emperor’s next great scape if that means i get to hang out with you ” There it was, he had laid out the bait, he could only pray she take it.
“That could very well happen, but I would hate to destroy your garden again” She chuckled nervously
“It would be worth it if I can see you again, soon” The hand on her knee squeezed and his eyes stared hopeful into hers. “Or maybe, we could just grab some vegan ice cream sometime”
“That sounds nice” She started turning her horse around to hide her very obvious blush, but he saw it and it had his heart fluttering and a big cheesy smile appearing on his face.
“Vegan ice-cream it is, then”
#grayson dolan imagine#dolan twins imagine#ethan dolan#grayson dolan#dolan twins#ethan dolan imagine#horselover#miniature horse#shetland pony#mustang#horses#new jersey#contryside
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9.
The body swap au a surprising amount of people asked for, actually.
Read on AO3 / Summary
Pairings: Eddie Kaspbrak / Richie Tozier
Warnings: swearing, sexual references
Chapter 9/?
Prev | Next
Word Count: 4490
Eddie’s playlist
_______________________________________________________________________
Do no harm, but take no crap.
His father had said that to him once when he was fourteen, over the kitchen table with a mouthful of scrambled egg. It was a rare week when both of his parents had been present for breakfast every single day, and Richie was striving to fit as much conversation and banter in with them as he could before his lucky streak ended. That morning, while Maggie sat sipping her coffee and idly perusing the lifestyle section of a home and garden magazine, he was trying to build up a decent back and forth with Wentworth. It started with Richie talking about the previous afternoon's Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles episode – well, it was more of a scene by scene reenactment –, and Went had soon tried to redirect the subject to school, and grades, and stuff Richie didn't feel much like talking about but he took the hint and indulged it anyway. After a while, his mother made an offhand comment about 'the nice boy next door,' and if 'you two were getting along yet', and he had groaned over-dramatically and made a show of face-planting into the table.
At that point, the Kaspbrak's had only lived there for a little over a month, and the only interactions he'd had with Eddie since their arrival had been brief and unpleasant.
“Pardon my french, ma, but that kid's an asshole,” he'd told her, then shovelled a heaped spoon of lucky charms into his mouth. Maggie had tsked, glancing up at Went and shaking her head before turning back to Richie.
“I don't think he has any friends, Rich,” she'd said, taking another sip from her mug, “I talked to his mother and she's-” she paused, thinking over her words for a moment, then sighed, “I'm sure he'll warm up to you soon.”
Richie had started to argue, but his father had cleared his throat and shot him a look that stopped him in his tracks.
“Do no harm, kiddo,” Went had said then, “but take no crap. From any of 'em. You remember that.”
Richie wasn't going to ask what that meant, but he'd nodded and given his dad a salute and a barking 'Yes Sir!', and Went had finished his food, pushed his chair back from the table and rinsed off his plate in the sink.
Now, Richie wasn't keeping extensive track of what harm he might be doing, but he sure as hell was taking a lot of crap lately.
After Eddie had taken a few tugs on the ol' lung sucker and calmed down enough to be reasoned with – calm by his standards, at least –, Richie could focus his attention on more important matters.
“What the fuck did you do to my hair?” he asked, really noticing for the first time how flat it looked. It was all slicked back out of his face, emphasising assets that Richie wasn't too keen about showing off, and oh, yeah he could smell the hairspray now. He reached up, attempting to dislodge a few curls and restore some volume, but didn't get very far before his hand was being slapped away.
“I couldn't stand it, dude!” Eddie whisper-yelled, re-smoothing it back down, “It was like, getting in my eyes and my mouth and shit – do you know how many kids here probably have lice?”
“You know that's a myth, right?”
Eddie blinked at him, for an extended moment, his mouth gaping in a goldfish-like fashion.
“Wh- LICE?” he actual-yelled now, his voice cracking, and man, his eyes were fucking huge in those glasses. How did anyone ever take him seriously?
(Sidenote: they didn't.)
Well, he thought, yeah. Lice were one of those things that your parents used to scare you into combing your hair every day. Didn't anyone ever tell you that, Eds? Jeez, next you're gonna tell me you still believe in the Easter Bunny, or cavities.
Instead of saying any of this out loud, though, he reached up again to try and tousle the uniformity out of his hair, only to receive another slap.
“Would you quit it?” Eddie berated, huffing and looking at least a little more dishevelled, before fumbling again for his aspirator and taking another pull.
“How'd you do this, anyway?” Richie asked, rubbing his thumb and index finger together and inspecting the oily substance they were now covered in. “I didn't think I had any hair stuff.”
He looked up, and Eddie averted his eyes, a slight tint starting to fill in his cheeks.
“I found some,” he said, shrugging in an attempt to appear inconspicuous and failing tremendously. Richie's eyes narrowed.
“Where?” he asked, – he highly doubted the boy was into midnight runs down to the corner store to pick up styling gel. At least, he hoped that wasn't the case, because holy shit, priorities.
“Why do you even care, anyway?” Eddie asked, “Not like you're the one getting your head slammed into walls now. And what's with that, by the way?”
“You're dodging the question because you did something weird, didn't you?” Richie watched him roll his eyes and grit his teeth before eyeing the door, but Richie was blocking his path and there was no way in hell he was letting this go until he got an answer.
What's one more absent mark, right?
“Come on, what was it?” he pushed, studying with intent the annoyed, flustered look Eddie was providing him. “You got hand lotion up in there? Bacon grease, maybe?” He sniffed his fingers, then wrinkled his nose. “Did you use your own spunk or somethin'?”
“Oh my god,” Eddie looked honest-to-god nauseas at this point, “please stop talking.”
“You did, didn't you? Kaspbrak, that is absolutely dees-gus-”
“It's fucking hair gel, okay! It's not-” His breathing was picking up again, and he had to close his eyes for a minute to recollect himself. He shook his aspirator, finger ready on the trigger, but he didn't use it. “I really needed to pee, and I tried to go in your bathroom, Rich, but there was mould on the shower curtain and there's been this really bad smell in there since last night and then the window wouldn't open this time and your toilet's like, directly opposite the mirror so I would have to look at myself – at you? Fuck, I just- I couldn't do it so I went into your parents room and I used their en-suite and it was just sitting on the sink and they were already both downstairs so I borrowed some.” He was talking a mile a minute, and he had to pause to catch his breath. “I didn't think I would be interrogated about it, so I'm sorry. But- spunk? Are you fucking twelve? Also I really think you should clean your bathroom. I could have snapped one of those washcloths in half.”
A moment passed before Richie responded, trying to absorb the run-on he'd just heard.
“You sit down to piss?” he asked, and Eddie went as red as a goddamn tomato.
“That's what you took away from that?!” he shrieked. Richie shrugged, throwing his hands up in a defensive gesture.
“Yowza, just seems weird, is all,” he laughed, somewhat nervously. “Thought the ability to stand up while taking a wizz was like, one of the main benefits of having a d-”
“I didn't want to touch it,” Eddie interrupted, then swallowed. He was picking at the cuticle on his left thumb – it was bleeding, and Richie just now noticed the bright green bandaid wrapped around the other one. “And I don't want to talk about it, either.”
“You wound me,” Richie said, with faux sincerity, hitting his chest with his fist, “right here. And, down there,” he pointed downwards with his other hand, and Eddie rolled his eyes again, even harder this time.
“I'm walking away from you now,” he said, and then did. He pushed the door open with his elbow and it swung shut behind him.
“You're welcome, by the way!” Richie called out after him, but he didn't get a response even though the fucker definitely must have heard him. “Not like I saved your life or anything. Dickhead.”
He let himself stew there for a while, occasionally kicking the wall or muttering obscenities, until the odour coming from one of the stalls finally became too much to handle and he figured he should at least try and go to class, – although, he'd completely forgotten to ask about Eddie's schedule, and he was now coming to the realisation that he hadn't given him his, either. He also knew there was a good chance Eddie had realised this too, and was just being way too stubborn to come find him and get it.
So, throwing that plan aside, he decided to enact his fallback. A plan that, while not being particularly helpful, may help him even out the playing field in regards to doing harm versus taking crap.
He made his way towards the art rooms, the idea gradually unfolding and building in front of him. In reality, it wouldn't end up being the mind-blowing game changer he was hyping himself up for, but it would surely scratch the itch.
Pulling up to the studios, and completely disregarding the fact that there was a class in progress to which he was now causing disruption, he scanned the room until he found who he was looking for.
Skirting the edge of the classroom, nearly knocking over several large canvases that had been leaned against the walls, as well as a drying rack displaying a few half-painted clay products and a large paper maché sculpture that Anne Anderson had been working on for a month now and still didn't resemble anything he'd ever seen before, he made his way over to the corner where Bill was situated. He was perched on a stool, mostly concealed from view by the canvas he had set up on his easel, but the top of his head was visible down to his brow, and the contrast of the blonde and red in his hair had imprinted on Richie enough to allow instant recognition.
“Eh-Eddie?” Bill startled as he approached, having been very focused on his painting. “Wh-wuh-what are y-you doing? I th-thuh-thought y-you w-w-were going to th-th-th-th-”
“Well gee,” Richie cut him off, smiling all too enthusiastically, “I just came to see my best pal and confidant Bill Dens-” he trailed off, was it Denson? That didn't sound right. Maybe Dan- no, it definitely started with Den. He sucked his teeth, wracking his brain for the correct information, and went to adjust his glasses only to smack the side of his face in their absence. Bill looked at him like he had two heads.
“So we're good friends, right?” Richie continued, waving off his bewildered expression. “Would you say we have a 'help each other with anything, no questions asked' kind of relationship?”
“Wh-why?” Bill leaned back slightly on the stool, cautiously putting a few extra inches between them.
“Because I need your help with something and I don't want you to ask any questions,” he said, watching something like alarm and or fear flicker in Bill's eyes. He leaned forward again, throwing a hasty glance around the room while pulling Richie in by his shoulder.
“Eddie did y-you fuh-ucking kill R-Richie?” he whispered, panicked.
“Woah, easy up cowboy,” Richie snickered, shrugging his hand off and straightening himself again, “how'd you jump to that conclusion?”
Bill didn't appear to ease up, only stared at him cautiously.
“Y-y-you t-talk about killing h-h-him a l-lot,” he said, then looked Richie up and down, “and y-y-you look kinda cr-crazy r-ruh-right now.”
Richie glanced down at himself. His shirt was half tucked into his jeans and he was, in fact, wearing two different coloured shoes. He hummed in acknowledgement, then looked back up.
“I promise that I have not committed murder,” he said, holding up three fingers in a scout salute. A little of the tension in Bill's shoulders seemed to release, but not much. “Whatcha paintin' anyway?”
Richie moved around until he was standing behind Bill, getting a straight-on view of the canvas, and let's out a low whistle. Because it had, you know, actually good. Better than anything he'd ever made in class, anyway. It also was not the pile of rocks sitting on a table at the front of the room that every other student was trying to recreate. He'd gone off book – a portrait, the central focus made up of bright, warm hues, standing out amazingly against the dark blue and purple floral arrangements scattered around the border. It had, like, actual depth and lighting and whatever the fuck else professional art terms Richie didn't pretend to understand. And, oh shit, that looked just like-
“Beverly?” he asked, raising an eyebrow at Bill, and watched him sputter, the tips of his ears turning pink.
“N-n-no,” he insisted, loudly, “i-i-i-it's n-n-n-n-nuh-n-not, I-”
Richie let out a honk of a laugh, patting him on the back.
“You are a riot, Billiam, we should totally hang out sometime.”
And before Bill could even begin to process what the ever-loving fuck is going on, Richie was pulling him to his feet, thrusting his backpack into his arms and leading him through the class room and out the door.
Bill, in the seemingly countless years he'd been friends with Eddie, had learned that sometimes it was better to just go with it. Truthfully, if it had turned out that Eddie finally did snap, and Richie Tozier was in fact lying lifeless on the floor of the boys bathroom, he wouldn't have been overly surprised. Sure, he might cry. Puke, maybe. Make a note to give him a stern talking to about why killing people is wrong, even if you don't like them very much. But at the end of the day, he'd help hide the body, and help create an alibi, and whatever else he needed to do. Because it was Eddie, – Bill would do all that and more, because he knew if the roles were reversed, Eddie would do the same for him.
So he let himself get dragged down an empty hallway, and he didn't ask too many questions about it. He figured the boy was only going through yet another manic episode, brought on by the upcoming track qualifiers or something his mother did or, more likely, something Tozier did. Jesus, there were days when Eddie talked about little else, and Bill suspected there were many more where he thought of nothing but.
There was always something, and increasingly so in the recent months. It was all 'Richie drew a dick on my window last night!' or 'Richie made fun of my height again!' or 'have you seen Richie today? He's wearing a hat and it's pissing me off!' or 'Richie looked at me funny in English so I'm gonna yell at him later!' and fuck, Bill really tried to be supportive, but sometimes he just wanted to lock them in the janitors closet together and give the rest of the world some peace. It's not like he didn't want to sympathise with every little complaint and annoyance that seemed to plague his friend's mind day in and day out, but he couldn't help but think, sometimes, that a lot of Eddie's mountains were actually molehills.
And, he'd never dare say it to Eddie, but Richie didn't seem all that bad. He shared a few classes with the guy, and sure he made some crass comments, smelled like an ashtray, and spent every single art class drawing dicks on any blank surface placed in front of him, but he wasn't outright awful. His friend's were nice too – Stan and Mike and Beverly Marsh – and Bill thought, if they all liked Richie Tozier as much as they appeared to, then he couldn't be as much of a terror as he'd been made out to be.
Hell, he reckoned that in another life, they'd probably all get along pretty nicely as a group of seven.
He followed Eddie into the bathroom, stood aside and waited for him to check that all the stalls were empty and lock the door, then watched him pull a large pair of kitchen scissors out of his backpack. Bill's initial reaction was knocked out of him, though, when Eddie then proceeded to start unbuttoning his jeans.
A strangled noise rose up from his throat, he could already feel the barricades forming on his tongue. He just gaped, rendered speechless in more ways than one.
“Fuck is you gawkin' at?” Eddie said in some undecipherable accent, looking up at Bill with the waistband of his pants hugging his thighs. Then he smiled, winked, held the scissors out in his direction – he took them, with hesitancy –, and pulled his pants the rest of the way down before stumbling out of them without taking his shoes off.
Bill suddenly wished he'd walked into a bloody crime scene instead. At least that would have made sense.
“Eds!” His words finally caught up to him, and he sucked in a gasping breath, immediately regretting it because the air tasted like stale piss. “W-w-w-wuh-what the f-f-fuck?”
“What?” Eddie laughed, holding the offending item of clothing out in front of him with both hands, as if inspecting them, before throwing them over his shoulder. “No boy's ever taken his pants off for you before?”
Christ, Bill thought, he's completely lost it. Next week I'm gonna be visiting him up at Juniper.
“Pass me those, will ya?” Eddie made a grabby motion at the tool in Bill's hand; he instinctively started to hand them over, then pulled them back.
“W-what are y-yuh-you gonna d-do w-w-w-with them?” he asked, his voice shaking terribly even with the stutter.
“We're gonna turn these here lame-ass pantaloons into something worth looking at, Billy boy,” Eddie replied. Bill continued to stare, addled and bewildered. When he left class he'd prepared himself for something illogical, another breakdown that ended with the two of them ditching until lunch so Eddie could vent his frustrations and scream into his fist. But this, whatever it was, was more than he would ever be able to brace himself for.
He shook his head, holding his hands out in a manner that he hoped said 'I have no idea what the fuck you're talking about, and it's nine thirty in the fucking morning,' because he was sure he wouldn't be able to say it out loud. Eddie sighed, yanking the scissors out of Bill's hand by the blades, and if that wasn't an indication that something was very wrong, then Bill didn't know what was.
“Aren't you, like, usually all over this shit?” Eddie asked, gesturing down to Bill's legs, clad in black jeans that were, as his parent's and teacher's had often chastised him for, ripped to shit, and Bill's brain whirred loudly for a minute before he thought he'd almost caught on.
“Y-y-you w-w-w-want me to h-huh-help y-you cut h-holes in y-y-your pants?” He guessed, and Eddie grinned, tilting his chin up slightly. “H-here? I-i-in the b-bathroom?”
“Would've been real fucking weird if I stripped down in the cafeteria,” Eddie said, and – well, Bill couldn't argue with that.
So, he helped Eddie bastardise his jeans, slicing them up more than he figured was necessary, but hey, who was he to try and put a muzzle on his best friend's identity slash fashion crisis. He even showed him how to create a frayed effect by quickly scrubbing the raw edges together, and honestly, after a few minutes he'd calmed down quite a bit, to the point where his stutter was nearly minimal. After his pants were back on, and Eddie had checked himself out in the mirror approvingly, he showed Bill how much length he wanted cut off the bottom of his t-shirt – not an excessive amount, but enough to show a sliver of skin if he lifted his arms up. It ended up a little lopsided, but not noticeably enough that it mattered. Bill thought Eddie was far past caring about that, anyway.
“What do you think?” Eddie asked, holding his hands on his hips and looking very unlike himself – so uncollected and messy, but not bad, Bill thought. He hummed, watching the other boy make adjustments as he looked at his reflection, past the streaks of grime and water stains and graffiti littering the mirror. He started to play with his hair, fluffing it out before running his hand back through it.
“I h-have an idea,” Bill offered, thinking that they'd gone this far, may as well keep piling shit on. He shrugged his backpack off, kneeling down to rifle through it until he found what he was looking for, producing a fistful of coloured markers held together with a rubber band. Eddie raised an eyebrow, the corner of his mouth lifting up into a smirk. “I p-promise it'll w-w-wash out.”
Meanwhile, Eddie – (the actual one) – had realised too late that he didn't have a clue where he was supposed to be going. Not that he would have been able to sit down and pay attention to anything, with the rate his heart was currently beating at, and the ache still pounding away at the back of his skull. Knowing that wandering the building aimlessly would definitely end in him getting written up by some freshman who thought that being a hall monitor gave you any real authority, and knowing that he couldn't exactly go back and talk to Richie, because duh, he headed out to the track. He knew it wouldn't be in use until the afternoon, and if he could waste some time by running in frantic circles then at least something would feel normal.
It wasn't as easy now – Richie's skinny jeans constricted a lot of his movement, and he kept tripping over his own feet, – but eventually he fell into a rhythm and just went.
He'd never really known why he liked it so much. He was good at it, sure. Really good at it. One-point-three-seconds-away-from-breaking-the-state-record good at it. That was the answer he gave people when they asked why, at least. If he was any sort of introspective he'd know that his skill played little part in the real reason.
His mother hadn't let him set foot in a physical education class until he was in high school, and that was only after a whole year of begging and pleading and compromise – he'd not participate in contact sports or anything with a bat, a promise that he didn't keep but she still believed he did. He'd joined track a couple years ago, which his coach recommended when Eddie consistently beat out the rest of the class in both speed and endurance any time they did laps. It's how he'd gotten closer to Ben, who as far as he could tell joined the team out of spite for another teacher who told him he'd never run a mile in under fifteen minutes, and he could now do one in seven.
Eddie told his mother that he spent those afternoons studying at Bill's, but some part of him always wanted to tell her. Wanted to say; 'just watch me, Ma. Just watch how fast I go! I'm fucking flying out there! I'm not breaking like you said I would! I'm not dying like you said I would!' but he knew that if she found out just how good he was at it, then she'd lock him up and never let him go. If she knew that he could run away, he'd never get the chance.
And god, it felt so fucking good. The feeling of his feet pelting against the tartan ground, the strain in his hamstrings, the burn in his calves, the sweat, the heat, all of it, – he felt alive out there. He could forget the pills and the calorie counting and the stupid piece of plastic that he didn't even need to have in his pocket when he was doing it, because it was the only time that his lungs ever felt open enough to breath on his own. He didn't even have to care about how that didn't make sense. It didn't matter. Nothing fucking mattered!
So he ran until the ache in his legs outweighed the one in his head, and then some, then when he couldn't run anymore he walked, and when he couldn't do that he laid down face first on the track. The synthetic material was cold due to the heavy cloud cover that hadn't passed in days, the familiar smell of rubber and grass invaded his senses. His glasses pressed uncomfortably into his face, and were also fogged up to the point of being useless, but he didn't bother to take them off. He hoped that if he concentrated on it enough, he might melt right down into the earth.
Before he could make any decent headway on that plan, he felt someone kick softly at his leg. He held his breath, playing dead in the hopes that they'd just go away, but they only waited a moment before kicking him again, a little harder this time. He tilted his head so he could see who it was, before exhaling a long sigh.
“Get up,” Stan said, dryly. Eddie turned his head back to his original position.
“Make me.”
There was a pause where he thought he might have left, but then he heard shuffling, and saw Stan sit down in his peripheral vision.
“Why are you out here?” Stan asked, leaning forward on his knees and resting his chin in his hands.
“Why are you?” Eddie retaliated, too tired for any real bite. Stan huffed, tapping his fingers along his cheekbone.
“Because I went to check on you in the sick bay and you weren't there,” he said, and Eddie felt a tinge of guilt at his tone, “I wanted to make sure you weren't being murdered.”
He turned his head again, resting his cheek against the ground so he was facing Stan.
“I thought you'd be out smoking on the football field again, but then I saw you lying in the middle of the running track. Shoot me for being worried.”
Eddie muttered a 'sorry', and Stan rolled his eyes before smiling down at him.
They give a crap, Eddie thought, suddenly remembering the roll of tape he'd earlier seen Stan take out of his bag. He forced down the lump that formed in his throat.
A few raindrops fell, dotting the ground in front of him and tapping softly against the side of his face.
“Come on,” Stan said, standing himself up and dusting off before reaching his hand out, “we'll go find Bev and Mike and wag next period.”
And Eddie thought, pushing himself up to his knees and taking his hand, hey, that doesn't sound too bad.
Tag list (bolded won’t tag): @fanficisgoodforthesoul @i-is-gazebo@dandeliontozier@panicatbakerst@howellhxlic@musicalsaftermusicals@bernaynay@bust-a-move-bev@reddie-to-go@richietoaster@omgboiledcabbages@reddietofall@flowersiren@lousytrashmouth@get-fcking-reddie@finnwollfhards @bjrdies@steve-harringtwin@thecastlebyers@books-and-donuts@valenschmidt@grasshoppper@80s-trashmouth@beepbeeprichiellc@little-miss-hellraiser@okay-i-get-it-alreddie@finn-trashmouth@kaspbrakseggo @lolahood @sad-synth@turtleneckrichie@reddieforanything @vitomire @its-stranger-than-you-think@spooky-risley@ohheydatsme@hoteltozier@holystanlon@apatheticphotos@dewdropseddie@ill-float-too@peterparkerwithoutacause@sir-furry @ailecstuff @bird-uris@iamworried7@beepbeepbitchard@trashcanonlegs@11leggomyeggo11@bisexual80scliffjumper@reddieseggrolls @rediietoship @starryeyedstanley @beepbeep-losers@richiefuckfacetozier
#writing#vice versa fic#reddie#richie tozier#eddie kaspbrak#reddie fanfic#in which both them have a fucking breakdown and also me. i have a breakdown too
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(AoT) You Dummy - Jean X Reader
Anime / Crossover: Attack on Titan
Songs: None
Request: None
Modern AU: No
NSFW/R-18: No
------------------------------------------------------------------
SPOILER FOR START OF FIRST SEASON
------------------------------------------------------------------
Your POV
My horse, Nephthys (who was named after the Egyptian goddess), rubs her snout against my hand as I reached up and patted her. She licked my hand and I grab her a carrot. Us Scouts had just come back from surveying the area and were waiting for the new recruits arrive at HQ. "I hate people." I say to myself without caring if anyone had heard me. "Y/N!" I hear Corporal Levi yell at me and I turn to him, saluting. "Yes, Sir?" I ask and he waves off my salute. "Don't say things like that around the rest of the cadets. They already have enough mental problems going on with all their comrades dying, they don't need you against them." I nod my head and lower it. "I'm sorry Sir. Thank you for letting me know. I'll try my best to improve my mood." I say before bowing and he walks away.
Captain's right, I need to be more positive around others. I think to myself before I hear a horses whinny and we all turn our heads to the carts carrying all new faces that were probably gonna be dead within the next 2 weeks. I watch as Eren smiles after waving to them. He must know them. I snarl at some two-tone haired fucker who was staring at me. I feel someone nudge my side and I turn back to see who it was. "What did I say?" Captain Levi asks me and I turn back to the horse I was scowling at and smile at him.
Jean's POV
I sat in the back of an old, wooden cart along with Sasha, Connie and the rest of the cadets who decided to join the scouts. I see Eren smiling and running over to Mikasa's cart as it pulls up to a stop. Damn you, you titan bastard. I think before turning my head to get out and landing my eyes on the most perfect girl I've ever seen. More perfect than Mikasa, which I thought was impossible. She was short with long black hair, actually, she was shorter than Humanities shortest- I mean strongest. She turns around and she scowls at me, even so, she was beautiful. It wasn't long before Captain Levi nudged her and she sighed, turned to me and smiled. An angel? I hear Connie laughing at me and I turn to him angrily. "What?!' I yell at him, but he just laughs harder. "Your face!" He says before Sasha walks over and starts laughing as well. "It's so red!" I storm off while telling them to shut up.
Your POV
I shrug off his angry exit before patting my horse again. "Go help the cadets Eren." I hear corporal say before a 'Yes, Sir!' was heard. "Y/N." He says and I turn to him. "You may go back to your room and finish off those reports on your ODM gear." I nod my head, salute him and begin walking off. "Actually, I want you to go around to each of the new rooms and make sure that the new recruits are getting on well. I'll give you an extension on the paperwork. The new recruits are nervous, fix that." I nod my head and salute him again before walking off to the area of the building that held all the rooms for the cadets. I sigh as I hear crying and murmuring, but it was nothing new in the scouts. I open the door to the Cadet room hallway and everyone turns to face me, girls on one side and boys on the other.
"How is everyone?" I ask and they all turn their heads with a look of guilt and sadness. "Everyone getting on alright?" I ask, but yet again, no answer. I sigh and cross my arms. "Everyone put your things down." I order and they all obey. "Outside, come on." I say as I gesture them outside to a small garden that was mainly used for us cats to recollect our selves if we were freaking out after or before an expedition, and it proved helpful. Everyone slumps outside and I follow behind them, making sure they don't go anywhere else. Once everyone is outside I hear a few gasps as they look around. "This is where you can come and calm down if you are feeling stressed. Before or after an expedition expect a lot of people in here." I say and they all begin walking around the garden.
"We can't be out here too long, you're supposed to be getting settled in." I say and they all turn to me. "Sorry for making you take us out here, we'll go back in now." Two-tone says before I push him back into the group. "You can go back soon, but not yet." I say and they all look at me, confused about what I was doing. "It's obvious that you're all nervous and scared to be here, I could tell just by looking at you when you arrived. Corporal Levi noticed it too." I say before sighing. "Listen, I know you think you've made the wrong choice, and you probably think that joining one of the other regiments would have been better, but you're wrong." I say as they look at me in disbelief. "You're all brave soldiers for offering up your hearts and lives for humanity and your lost friends."
"You-" I say as I point to baldy. "You were in the top 10 and aiming to join the Military Police, am I right?" I ask and he nods. "I...I want people to respect me and I want to be safe from the Titan's." He admits and I sigh. "No one respects the Military Police. They just care about themselves, they don't even care about their comrades. They'd gladly sacrifice you so they could live, without a second thought." I say, and by his expression, I see he was reconsidering what he said. "What about you?" I ask as I point to the next person. Each one of them explains why they didn't want to be here and wanted to join another regiment, except one, two-tone.
"Why did you join the Scouts instead of one of the other regiments?" I ask him and he squeezes his right hand. "I...I have to avenge someone." I see everyone else about to cry. He must have been someone important. "Who?" I ask, trying to get a real answer. "A friend...we were going to join the Military Police together but a Titan ripped him in half..." He trails off before looking down in shame. "Marco Bott." I say and their heads flick up to me. "H..how-" "I was friends with his family, so when the military informed them I got informed as well." I say with a sympathetic smile. They all look down uncomfortably. "He didn't die pointlessly. His death brought you all here, didn't it?" They all nod. "Then don't make his death meaningless and help humanity." I say and some of them begin breaking down. "As long as you don't give up, living isn't as hard as people make it out to be." I say as I kneel down onto the ground to help one of them up. "Our friends did not die in vain, we won't let them." I say as the little blonde stands up with my help. "No, we won't." Says two-tone and I smile at him. "Good. Now go get unpacked and come here in exactly 2 hours. Commander Erwin is going to talk to you all." I say and they nod, salute and walk away.
2 hours later
"And lastly, this is Y/N. Some of you may know her as Humanities Second Strongest, only being outdone by Captain Levi. She will be here to help you through any problems and will also be dealing with personal training. If we think you could improve any of your Titan-fighting skills we will send you to her." I hear Dancho explain as I stand in between Captain Levi and Section Commander Hange. I see two-tone staring at me again, so I decide to confront him about this after. As the cadets are walking back to their dorm I catch up horse face and tap him on the shoulder. He turns around to me and I ask him to come to the garden later. I see his face redden slightly before nodding and walking off. He's kinda cute actually... I think to myself with a smirk.I turn around and begin talking to Hange.
Later that night
I send up from my paperwork and walk out to the garden, where I promised to meet horseface. "Still awake Y/N?" I hear corporal ask. "You should know by now that I have trouble sleeping at night, Captain." I say and he just nods. "I understand. I go through the same thing as well. It's alright, just try not to wake the new recruits." He says before I nod and he walks off. I chuckle as I see two-tone struggling to stay awake as he sat on the edge of the small fountain. "You're early." I say to him before his head snaps up to me. "Yeah, I...couldn't sleep." He says as he looks to the ground. "How funny, you seemed pretty tired to me." I joke, causing him to blush slightly. "Is it because of Marco?" I ask as I sit next to him. He nods sadly and I sigh. "I'm sorry for bringing him up." I say as I put my hand not his knee.
"What did you want to talk to me about?" He asks as he looks away from me. "I noticed that you've been staring at me almost all day, is there something you need to tell me?" I ask and he blushes harder. "N...no." He says and I chuckle. "What's your name?" I ask as I pull his chin to face me. "J...Jean. Jean Kirschtein." He stutters as I remove my hand from his chin. "It's nice to meet you, Jean, now is there anything you need or want to tell or ask me?" I ask again and he just shakes his head. "I know you're lying Jean, maybe it's because you don't know me well enough yet." I say and he just shyly nods his head a little. I giggle and ask what he wants to know about me. I answer all his random questions about my favourite colour or season until the full moon circles right into the middle of the sky.
"Ah, it's so pretty." I sigh happily as I look up at the glowing sphere. "Yeah." Jean says as he looks up as well. "Sometimes I'm glad that I suffer from insomnia. It’s things like this that you miss when you sleep." I say. "You suffer from insomnia?" I hear Jean ask and I look at him. "Yeah, it's nothing too serious, I can fall asleep some nights but most nights I can't. It started when everyone I loved was killed, be it by Titans or Bandits." I reply before he wraps his arm around my shoulder gently. "I'm sure they're happy where they are now." He says with a sad smile before I break down. As tears flooded from my eyes he hugs me tighter. I bawl and bawl and bawl my heart out, letting go of all the emotions I had held in for all these years. "It's alright." Jean whisper and he hugs me tightly.
Once I finish crying I stay in his arms. "Jean?" I ask and he hums. "IF you were gonna ask me out, now would be a good time..." I say as I look up at his blushing, surprised face. "Y...you know what I'm gonna ask..." He mumbles as he looks away. I grab his chin and pull his face towards me before kissing him gently. I feel him tense up extremely before relaxing and kissing me back. I pull away and smile at him. "Is...is that a yes then?" He asks and I playfully hit his head.
Of course, you dummy!
#aot#attack on titan#snk#shingeki no kyojin#jean kirstein#jean kirschstein#x reader#reader insert#spoiler
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Oceaxereturns is very persuasive
Despite me being the worst at delivering Tumblr content, @oceaxereturns encourages me with tagging in memes. This one was to share 10 things about myself, so here goes.
1. I have broken lots of bones. Most often little ones: toes from horses treading on them, fingers with balls whacking them the wrong way. But some big ones, thanks to taxis for the most part, and my nose far too often (at least two dumb-arse stories there). I've got strong bones -- given some of my accidents I should have broken far more! But two tonnes of taxi is really hard to argue with.
For the most part, this just means I have the odd day when I'm limpy and notably achey, but it made me furious in fandom once. I'd written Harry as not liking painkillers after having a bad accident and a reader wrote an angry comment saying this was the sort of arrogant bullshit able-bodied people thoughtlessly write, not considering those who live with chronic pain. I tried to be thoughtful in my reply and think I was semi-successful, but not a word of even grudging 'eh, maybe' back. Harry's injuries in the story came from two of my traumas mashed together. I'd clearly written his experience as traumatic, not stemming from an illness or condition. His aversion to the dissociative experience of opiates was mine. AND I WROTE THAT STORY WITH A BROKEN BLOODY WRIST.
I'm still narky.
2. I am really bad at letting things go sometimes.
Though, the upside of a taxi to the head is I am great at other times, since ten minutes later I have no recollection of the event. If you ever piss me off, say something really interesting immediately afterwards before the irritation can make it to my long-term memory and you should be fine!
3. Animals are the best. No correspondence will be entered into. I mean, I love my friends, family, the delightful Mr Brammers and quite a lot of others, but I could be standing in front of Judi Dench, Richard Armitage, Desmond Tutu and Beyonce and I would definitely ignore all of them for a minature horse. Or puppy, cat, alpaca or non-venemous snake. Possibly an interesting bird, bee or cute spider. Not a cockroach. One of my three cats is snoring beside me as I type, I cannot tell you how much this charms me.
4. For many years I could point to either the UK where I grew up or Australia where I live now and say 'But at least their politicians are rational!' Now we seem to be locked into some deranged competition to out-ghastly, out-racist and out-stupid each other and I am torn between jealousy of New Zealand and relief that at least the US President is still the worst. But I haven't written any political satires of late as they all pale beside reality.
5. My garden is a bit geared towards producing food, flowers and shade and a lot geared towards providing habitat and food sources for bees, birds, lizards and frogs. I need to do more in the way of spiny shrubs for small birds, but have done well with wattlebirds, figbirds, koels and the like. And pigeons. So many pigeons. It's not their fault. A few of them are even native! Eight bee species and counting, plus a happy group of paper wasps who are generally no stress but who build their nests in places that need moving every year. I never move them because I am not convinced I know how to do that effectively.
6. I like making and building things. This garden is one of many, and there is knitting, weaving, sewing and leatherwork. I keep thinking that this will be the year I get into carpentry, so far it has not been.
7. My family are half rural, half city, so I can milk cows, hand-feed orphaned animals, ride horses and bicycles and make epic compost, but also navigate public transport, mock flashers and find a good gay nightclub on my first night in any Western city.
8. I can't drive. I hate cars and am a wee bit angry (also an angry wee bit, being quite little), so if I had a licence I know I would end up folllowing someone home and being arrested for kicking in their letterbox while shouting that they had nearly killed me or someone else by not indicating. There may have been a few incidents involving muggers and cars that tried to kill me while I was cycling that have cemented this belief.
9. Recently I helped campaign for a yes vote in Australia's marriage equality stupid survey thingy (seriously, it was an appalling waste of $100 million because our politicians caved to conservative wankers and failed to do their job, and even now it's being dragged out in a vile Festival of Bigotry from some quarters).
I did nothing like as much as many wonderful young people, and even then I was emotionally exhausted at the end of it. Fifty years after I came into the world with a lesbian mum, twenty-two years after the last time I went out with a girl (my sexuality is best described as 'anyone funny and pretty'; I am sadly shallow), I cannot believe we are still having to fight these battles! But two things cheered me: one was the large number of magnificent young people I met on marches and at events -- and wonderful old people, some of whom were old friends from campaigns past! A teenager was trialling their first pair of stilletos on a 3km march 'Because I need to get this right by Mardi Gras!' and we all formed a supportive gang to get them through when the blisters and the pinching started: 'You look so glamorous! Your legs are amazing! You are WORKING that walk!' They had four or five friends, but forty or fifty strangers were all there to offer encouragement and would have helped with the carrying if things got grim. More power to you, young one!
The second thing was a man I doorknocked. He lives up the road and I was just having a word with neighbours to tell them my story about growing up the child of lesbians (no harm from any of the parental units, rather a lot of stress from religious types fighting against my family). 'Oh, the gays,' he said. 'I don't really hold with the gays. I don't really think they should be getting married.' 'OK,' I said, 'well, I'll leave you to it, then.' He put a hand up peaceably to stop me. 'Oh, no, I don't hold with them, but I put my vote in. I voted yes. Because I don't hold with the gays, but I really hate that Tony Abbott fucker, so anything that will upset him, I'm for.'
10. I do miss having the time to devote to fandom, but I need to finish and sell books. Fandom goes on strongly regardless, and Tumblr has also been fun for seeing what happens in other fandom lands. Plus it introduced me to @emilyscartoons and her Background characters, which have had me in stitches all through an otherwise grim 2017. Last night Mr Brammers excitedly called me into his study to tell me about an awesome Harry Potter cartoon I would like. You know the end to this story.
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Clone Wars Episode 18
Mystery of a Thousand Moons
So,
Mystery of a Thousand Moons
Starts
with a really strong quote
“ A single chance is
a galaxy of hope,”
And into the episode
“Hard pressed Jedi,”
[Shows Ahsoka]
Ah, mate?
that is one of the biggest Mary Sue’s in the series,
Reason you can’t see her face?
She’s smiling
Good
Alright
Okay
“ everyone on Naboo would be dead now,”
.....
That
assumes
that
they
would
be
very
unaccountable
and
toxic
Like,
no
one
they
had
to
blame
but
themselves,
for
that
Just another boring day saving the universe....
You did help
I will give him that
Obi-Wan did do something
in the previous
Episode
A child soldier also had a fight his battles
But that’s besides the
point
Theed
Pretty sure that’s a war crime
*Surprised there not taking him to the Galactic government for that
Whelp
Virus
Bombs
Okay...?
So it didn’t dispose
So long as you established some mild amount of accountability
And locked him up
That shouldn’t be a
problem
A droid must’ve taken it........
These episodes never do start off
on the right foot
do they?
It’s always some hilarious miscarriage of logic
Turning out to be true
Okay, where does this
lead?
Aight
Okay, bullshit, movie
You showed that little fucker running away
When
his
shit
was
taken
Truly doubt he has such specific programming as to ran away when object of your concern has been taken but resume
oper
-ation
And
Track
A
Vial
That
Could
be
Anyway
It’s not impossible but it is damn well
unlikely
So they didn’t destroy these
fuckers
??
Heck
Whelp
Bull-shit
[ You can tell
they didn’t plan this shit
in advanced]
We saw that little
fecker - there was
nothing in his hands
Really ret-con
ning
It’s not worthy of a
sin on its own;
But it’s a damn good way to
piss off your audience!
Hopefully the episode is
worthy of that
ret-con
Doomed
Oh they’re actually
taking him
some what
seriously
That’s-
A bit
better
Not
Perfect
Okay
Bullshit
Dude
Might’ve
Been
Self-
Destructive
But
he at least had the intell
-igence not to auto-
Mate it-
Wait,
It
Caused
An
Earth
Quake?
(We did see the security system overreact, so I’m not going to call that one too harshly
Also, okay
Lock down the lab
quarantine those fuckers
And they will be fine
in like five days
(Maybe more if you want to like
pass them some
ibuprofen)
This is fine
Safe
room
This is the place of a mad (unaccoun-
table doctor - who thought killing people was a
good idea-”
You’re honestly
going to trust the safe
room?
Better
idea; get the
fudge out of there
(And again just toss whoever got sick
some ibuprofen)
Problem solved
Seriously
They
Have
Masks
They’re
Adults
They’re
Fine
.....
Okay,
Padme
....
Okay, she does have the.
thing
(Not sure if it was in a
previous scene - I wasn’t paying attention
that much)
Anakin
Hey, the only character I actually care about is
here!
(He’s the only one
whose sickness isn’t
his own fault
Okay
Yeah sucks
that no one else got those protective suits
Well at least all the sick guys some
ibuprofen
(I’ll try to keep the ibuprofen jokes down to a
minimum)
Ahsoka, has sealed off the entire
facility
Cool, pass people down there some food
(and medicine) and wait for it to pass
down
Droids
Break out
You locked down the facility?
How can the dude unlock it
down?
Can’t you just-
No, sit in quar
-antine
Let the people out
side keep the door shut
And don’t feck around
with this thing
“Be
care-ful,”
No
one
is
Put this
on
“You’re bringing the
child?! ‘
Why?
He’s - like,
The only one
of you guys can get sick from this thing!
Aight
Ahsoka
Oh, yeah
let’s drag the other child soldier into this!
(Are
you trying to get everyone killed?]
Seriously
Droids
Dude,
Seriously
Also you asking the “Mad” (Unaccountable!) scientist,
For the antidote?
Scour on the planet
You’ll likely find some (medicine) ibuprofen, capable of lessening the side effects, and compatible with their biology
Rule
Manufacture a plague
That’s
really
impossible
unless
everyone
is
an
unaccountable
(Like in order to get that it should’ve killed you too)
And (Possibly) anyone nearby
Who
wasn’t
Practic
-ing
Account-
Per
son
ally
Bull-shit
That
this
works
“Cure,”
Stop
poking
the
wound
Someone wants to fuck around with mother nature and pay the consequences that’s their own prerogative
So long as you
don’t fuck
around with mother
nature, it
ain’t
Your
Pro
blem
“Games,”
So stop dealing with that fucker and go toss the clones some
food
Or look for some damn
ibuprofen
(I’m sorry
it’s becoming the
running joke
of this episode)
Seriously this
guy should be
dead
Unless
he had a damn good healer on his team
Whom I respect
immensely, having to deal with the majority of individuals who decide to, “ fuck around and find out,”
Who decide to say, to mother nature, nah
I got this
And hold them
accountable
* having both the ability and mak- ing the decision, to do so
And that’s feckin
Ballsy
on the other hand whoever
cured this guy clearly wasn’t practicing
accountability,
As if mother nature decided this guy was
too stupid to live, you sure
bet he’s not coming back into society
*Should
Kill me now
I sure
wish
they would
(Un-
Accou
n
-tability)
unaccountable
freak
of
nature
“ first droid breaks out of that laboratory,”
There’s one
Also well guess
we’re sealing it off till it
dies
Bye
Made,
Man
Didn’t they say it was eradicated?
Through the adjacent
herb
Put in accountability
There we go
Problem
solved
Fastest way to
save
Again throw a
Tylenol
(Yes I have changed the thing,”
Find an actual antidote
Again is there not one?
Toss the herb
Throw them in accountability
Standard
procedure
Aight
There they go
Whelp
In here
Thought that was reasonable
Dead
Man
You’re wearing masks
And are adults....
Again yeet a Tylenol
Send them to
Accountability
If there’s anything we should be worried about is
Ahsoka
Yeet her into
stable
environment
And....
hope for the best
Not
sure how badly this would affect someone who can’t assume authority/
(/accountability)
The best course of action
is just to not let them near that kind of stuff
I don’t know what kind of
idiot decided against that
*unaccountable
Almost, certainly
the same one that decided to bring the other one
unaccountable
Into the situation
Aka our toxic “love birds” of stupidity
Stop that droid...
My master....
Will find a cure
For the
virus
Wasn’t the cure already found?
Like,
Everyone’s still alive
And, we have recollection of it
(Which wouldn’t be possible...)
Dead yet
Yeah
let’s drag her into a virus affected room without any knowledge
Contaminated
Again, these fuckers decided to takeoff
their helmet
Is there no regulation??
Like, if they die
it’s on their own screwup
No sympathy
*Like I want them to reach a healer and
be held
ac
-countable
If
anyone
can
and
wants
to
is
another
argument
entirely
Healing
is
not
a
guaranteed
ability
In
the
direct
line
of
productivity
you
shouldn’t
be
fucking
around
with
things
that
could
get
you
killed
or
mother
nature
So someone that will heal you from your
own
unaccountable
actions
Is
not
a
guarantee
Like
with
food
or
water
Move them away from you for Jesus Christ sake
Like, seriously
Neither of you are healers...
And Ahsoka can’t assume accountability
Aight,
Back to this
Scene
Right,
Okay
Treachery
Great...
Antidote
I think I found the answer for you
No shit
Okay,
the
....
The captain of the guard doubles as a
healer
Good for him
Good to know he has that ability
Rep
Syrup
Aight
Iego?
....
Okay
bullshit
movie
Compatible
cures
can
only
be
found
on
planets
with
compatible
eco- ology
Meaning
the cure
(the best cure)
(Or healer)
Should be
on planet
Possibly
near
the
area
Point being
this should be on
planet
And a great chance to show some nice
scenery
And use the new queen
And show Amidala reacts to how things have changed since she became senator...
I’m
disappointed
That’s why most
find-a-cure- missions
Because why would
planet fuck it have
a cure
for an
incompatible species?
You can’t
just toss
that thing up
Deep separatist
controlled
space
Seriously?
Does
no one have a
greenhouse?
(Herb
focuses
aren’t
necessary,
but I did figure there’d be one gardening
person!)
Move cautiously
Seriously,
Is there
no
Active
Healer
Focus-
Es-
Or
even
a
herb
guy?
(It’s possible
it’s just really
weird)
We did see doctors
I mean.
Why
Can’t
You
Send
One
Of
Them?
Like the system’s already
enabling
You’re telling me there’s, not, like one
neutrally enabled
herb
guy
That isn’t just like
Yeah, dude
what did you get into..?
Oh shit, yeah let me throw some reet wood on that, dude
Again,
Possible
Just out
of the ordinary
“There’s no time
for caution,”
Whoa, whoa, where did that come from?
NOW he’s scared about
Ahsoka??
(Like normally
(And I mean normally is in
Ahsoka not being an abomination of nature,
That would be kind of normal
And a reason to
fret, because
We don’t know- if that
kid will survive)
But-
It’s really un
earned
-Just
Every
where
No humanity
to any of
this
“And so is
Padme,”
Obi-wan
Narrow
-ing
eyebrows
Seriously?
Like even by your own rules you should care about your
senator
This is just
really un-earned
Like,
You did no part to earn
that, movie
You didn’t set up Obi-Wan is a demanding
and/or intimidating individual
You didn’t set up Anakin as a child following orders and having to correct at said orders/responses
Or
An adult that is continuing to enable Obi-wan’s behavior
You haven’t even set up
whatever Anakin/Padme
‘s relation-ship
is supposed
to be
You’ve been writing
(and having them
acted)
Like some
alien hybrid
that’s only job
is to be
an asshole
As such I can’t take any of this with
any bit of seriousness
The tone struggling on light
unrealistic-ness
You need some hum
-anity
Cause those things
aren’t human
“ it’s a suicide mission
once we contain the virus,”
Are you
actually going to start doing that?
Letting them die out
Or
Getting a damn
Healer?
-troops
Aight
Also how deadly is this
thing supposed to be?
[The thing about healers
that makes them so specific,
There’s A) having access to the plant of
whatever you fecked with
(Having
Herbs on
deck when
you
do)
And the knowledge of which
plant will actually fix the problem
(Exclusive to
them.)
Also,
The willing
-ness]
Point
Being;
How rare is ibuprofen?
There are no other medics
And, you can’t toss them
down some food?
....
Like, seriously
What are your troops
even doing?
(They don’t seem to be quarantining!)
(I concur)
Seriously,
Okay,
Also, yeah, how’s that awkward car ride going to be?
....
What-ever
No show of Obi-wan as he used to be
No actual resent-ment from Anakin
The main reason
most people decide to enable
Just...
Hey, they’ll be fine!
(Nothing told]
“ if we suc
-ceed,”
Again you set up no
risks-
This thing could kill them
today or
tomorrow;
I have no idea
I don’t
Oh, ok
now there’s other droids!
[This is getting very
heavily bullshit]
Also you’re trusting
basically clankers
to open the door?
Good for
you...
“How we going to get
out?”
“Not our
problem,”
Well, there
went any medium
of slight risk
Neat
Dude,
cou-
ghing
Seriously, winner,
of the Darwin award
over here
(Why?)
Whelp
Oh they’re standing right behind the
child
how nice
My pity is
feckin minimal
Okay
We’re right outside your safety room
Okay, great
‘ can you get the door open,’
Oh, yeah that’s great
Like not only should we let the
de-adly virus into the room
Let the vulnerable
child get the door
Great job
Amidala
Any other
Babies
You
want
to
murder?
“ go
ahead
Jar-
jar,”
Did you ask the
other kid
to do it for you
Fecking brilliant
Didn’t even try to see if Rex and their others were wearing the helmet
Just....
Amidala
Trash
(Where
she
belongs)
(You cannot convince
me
she isn’t the villain)
“i’m sorry Ahsoka”
For
what,
endangering
a
child
(To
possible
death)
Because that’s the only reason that
she
would
be
apologizing
Here;
it
makes
no
sense
“ we still have
a
job
to
do,”
No you don’t
You heard the
droids...
They don’t give a
shit...
....
Emm
Able
Oh also now everyone has their
helmet
off
Winners of the Darwin award,
This Squad
Now
they’re
on
Geez, that really
helps...
....
Cutting through the
wall,..
And now they care....
This episode
really is setting
a bad
example
For
What
Justifies
Using
A
Ret-
Conn
For
...
Okay someone’s helmet’s going to get broken...
Aight
Ahsoka is just plain
fecking fine
Good to know that I will never have to worry about
her this entire episode
Don’t open
that hatch?
Again,
how?
They....
Hmm
....
Aight
This
Grave- yard
Those are
rocks
Now their
ship parts...
Okay
Simple
Enough...
No
AA
Guns
Aight
alright
don’t
try
to
land
anywhere
subtle
(Not like in an unidentified ship Landing in the port will raise any
questions)
(Obi-wan
loves
conflict)
See?
You
can’t
not
notice
that
Every
one
is
down
for
murder
(Specifically
of
the
roombas)
Death
roombas
Anakin
🎵 No emotion 🎵
None
What-so-ever
“Welcome to
Iego,”
Not...
Death
Roombas?
No
Guns....
ANAKIN!
..............
......
WTF
(Anakin’s
an
asshole!)
(Like
I don’t care how they try
to play that off..)
He’s
Irredeemable
(Nothing
after this
is surprising)
Like
they could’ve been
sentient
And regardless
wrecking someone’s shit (that isn’t made for practice exercises)
(More then
five times!)
Toxic...
Beyond redemption
(Or anything else besides accountability...
..)
Not relatable
Dick move
Seven
Teen
I don’t think
they were battle droids mate
I think they were just automated
welcome
Anakin destroyed someone’s prized welcome droids
That they may just to make people..
happy
There isn’t exactly a rule about property ownership...
Wait, yes there is...
Don’t be a
dick!
(Don’t be a
dick!!)
(You can’t kick them from
society for it...)
But...you can bar them from your place
Not cool...
Dick
“18, actually,”
Shut up.
J.Bo
Probably
the
owner
of
the
establishment
you
just
trashed...
Dick....
Droids...
He has
a point
Not a
Kid
Really...
has
gone
off
the
deep
end
Rash
No
...
Well
a screw in my brain has clearly come loose....
We already have one badly written
child
character
Two
in
doubt
And
now
this..
Hm
If you don’t want to write decent child characters
don’t
write
them
(And
I
mean
don’t
write
them,
Child
Characters)
Write
adults
(And
I
mean
do
it
properly,
Don’t
childify
Them
And pretend
like they aren���t
accountable
for their
actions
......
As
you
can
tell
I’ve
gone
to
some
thing
of
a
Tranquil
fury
state
Now
paying attention
after
Anakin
screwed
with
a
bunch
of
dude’s
property
.......
But there’s really nothing on screen to justify it
Do
you
know
what
would’ve
been
better?
If Anakin had actually run into a semi accountable adult, Who bought him from his establishment under said reasons, and that was the core conflict, with Obi-Wan talking to the owner,
And Anakin left to contemplate his action
Possibly deciding to fix the droids,
Not out of any attempt
for forgiveness,
But just because
Showing
the
realization of the effort it takes to
make
something
Or
possibly
deciding
to
destroy
them
more
Showing
his
shift
from
his
original
state
Possibly
some
resentment
towards
his
origin
And.. how a good thought can be twisted it into a
bad action
Children
aren’t
spoiled
They repeat actions
they have
have been
ordered
to
repeat
The giving of initiative
to this child
Makes me
worried that
writers are
victim blaming
Children
And a popular ‘look at this spoiled brat, he’s clearly responsible for his condition,’ ‘Isn’t that funny’ attempt to dodge responsibility, when in reality it has never been funny, always toxic, And it says nothing good about the medium or the writer who decided to write it
Even writers to attempt to mock this trope, Are in thin leniency,
Because
the
only
way
to
stop
seeing
this
Trope,
is
to
stop
writing
it
So
it
can
die
Where
writing
like
that
belongs
You
know
what
would
be
interesting?
And adult character
written
like
that
(Because
adults
are
actually
capable
of
malician
Unlike
children
Much
more
realistic
Much
funnier
for
everyone
involved
(Including
the
audience)
And
without
that
pesky
concern that
enabling (and encouraging) the thoughts that children are capable of
malacian
And should be held to the same
standard
Is
Morally
Wrong
Now continuing on with the
story
“Droll,”
That..
Poor
Droid
Planet
[you know it would make a lot more sense for him
to be here alone
If he was an adult
And for “Droll”
, to leave a rich millionaire
on an uncharted planet
Alone.
......
Continuing
on...
....
[you are here
how child
who shouldn’t
be capable
of intuitive]
50 tried
50 died
How long have you been around to
see that
happen?
Droll
Why?
You
have
to
get
a
plant
Nothing
About
[also how much cooler do you think it would’ve been if those have been
child soldiers and this was an adult just cautiously,
No caution - referen
-ing
How
they
died
like
a
sporting
event?
Possibly showing Obi-wan’s
enabling side?
Instead of
this
monstrosity?
Ok,
we’re
here
now
Don’t know where
those things came from since they just defeated
the battalion
before hand
Okay
Alright
No
Risk
....
[Some
-one
gave
the
child
a
gun...
!
Okay
What
The
Fuck
You
put
those
eyebags
of
“sickness”
back
where
they
belong
movie
You’re
(Your)
Mary Sue
didn’t
earn
them
And
showed
no
signs
before
While soldiers in almost
complete armor were coughing up their lungs
Senator’s
Screw-ed
Show
off
those
eye-bags
of
death
now
movie
they
weren’t
there
before
Anyway
.....
......
Don’t
Care
(Skip)
(Emotionally!)
Look
Fine
Back
Here
Why?
Why
are
they
on
a
cliff?
Movie,
you
didn’t
explain
anything
Something
.....
Roots
Vine
Plants
don’t
like
it
[do you know this would be a normally philanthropic gesture, from someone ( an adult,) who seemed otherwise un-interested and
enabling of a bad situation
Here
It’s
Just
🖕
(Dropped
it)
On
my
way
to
find
my
decreasing-
Oh
there
it
is
at
the
absolute
bottom
Because
I
don’t
give
a
shit-
Teeth
There’s no teeth there
animators
Xandu
Great
That
He
found
one
Hope
on
Whelp
( )
Good
Idea
It Wasn’t
...
We’re back to the hatch
Why
Okay
How do you know where they are
how do you know there’s more
Lots
of things being skipped over
And I don’t have the time
to format them
(Nor the patience...
Okay
Really
risking
it
Argh
Don’t.
Care
Alright
Yes
Surprisingly
Despite
all
logic
🖕
This
How
Specific
are
they
...
What?
What
was
I
supposed
to
get
there
animators?
(Or
voice
actors)
.....
Hm
They didn’t hit the...
Wtf?
Okay
Again why are the teeth
doing the thing??
No explanation
“Hurry,”
It’s
Bed
Rock
Screw
Cure
“You
Made
It”
Again
could’ve
been
a
cute
moment
.....
Instead
Well
Spice
So
he’s not alone
(Also how
with that supposedly big threat?
That’s
supposedly
devastated
several
ships
Also
so his parents were some old time
Mogul
What a been nice to have an adult
voice this
Using the back water
as a justification
Here;
It’s just
nothing
Left
Can’t
leave
because
of
the
cur(ve)
Nice
justification
Would be nice if it came out of an actual adult
Instead of this walking horror
abomination of nature
Curse
Okay, movie
you might have me back
Does the curse
Possibly revert
Him
To a younger age?
Cursed?
Any one
going to explain that
Cursed by who my
twitchy friend?
No start with a
“what is the curse
?”
Droll
“A Ghost?”
Shut up Anakin
There are
force ghosts
Also- seriously
We’re mashing
those
two tropes?
Also why do you
care?
You
have
people
to
save
You
have
time
for
weird
curse
bullshi-
(Sorry
too
ag-
gressive)
Later
Now
is
not
the
time...
You
know
what?
Maybe
it
is-
BECAUSE
THE
STORY
HASN’T
CLARIFIED
ANYTH-
I
am
very
angry
at
the
story
right
now
Mainly
For~
Anyway .....
.......
Our
Protector
Don’t fuck around with
magic
Specifically
Luck
Because it
wouldn’t exist if people are accountable
And
the
world
does
not
deal
with
slackers
lately
(Trust
me
I
know)
Destroy
all
Not very specific
Also
what’s that curse about then?
Cause
you’re
still
alive
“Super-stition,”
Obi-Wan
said
language
Also Obi-Wan your Council turns into force - ghosts
You, shut the fuck up
(Lightly]
Okay
That proves
literally nothing
Also “friend”,
He’s
severely
older than you
Also I guarantee it’s going to be like an
AA tower or something
Something explainable
(Not a bad thing
it’s actually a pretty good thing on logic)
Just saying
a lot of jumped beliefs
And the kids shouldn’t care about it
At most, trained
to wince at it’s name
Okay...
Whatever old man,-
Let’s go fight that monster
(Or AA tower)
Or whatever
it is
Okay
Taken as a
challenge
Alright
Okay
Seriously
what is Droll??
Aight
Okay
“ blew up those
ships,”
Besides an
electromagnetic
field
And their own incompetency?
Okay
Real we can handle
Yeah
Unless it requires him to be an
actual adult..
Too bad
I really like those guys
Children
can’t
Li-
What-ever
[ How long till they crash?]
Help
More then he should be able to
Kid
The only acknowledgment of something that shouldn’t
exist
Aka..
THAT’S NOT A FUCKING, KID!
Aka, it’s an abomination
of fucking nature!
That’s
what
it is!
Al-right
Give him the com?
And that’s when it hits him...
Like
I’m
100%
betting
(Not
Act-ually)
That
the
kid
is
“behind”.
it
Aka
Shit
happens
right
after
he
asked
Meant
to
be
(dramatic)
irony
But comes across as a kid
pulling the strings
Okay,
Not Gonna notice
that?
Oh now you do
What is it
Okay,
how do they not know that’s what that is?
Also, only for people going out
Weird Separtist flex but Okay
So what
next?
No
Turn the ship around
That - would be a good idea
Destroy the-
satellite-
Aight-
Anakin, sees your odds-
And decides-
fuck yes you have a point
Turn around
Turn around
Tell those guys what happened
(Also all those previous
pilots just did not give a fuck!)
Screw with the satellite!
....
Leaving the planet
Weird
Again, weird flex
... But okay
Back
‘They decide (not) to wear the shield like an idiot...’
‘Muddled crowd displeasure before dispersing’
‘wanted to hear squash’
Some guy
*some
separtist
guy
Like all the adults know what’s going down in the circumstance and just decide to fuck with the foreigner
“Master,”
Asoka
calling
her
mom
Also no movie you can’t make me feel bad for
Ahsoka
Amplify
the
signal
How?
Aight
“Destroyed
all the droids
in the compound,”
Oh yeah so now you know the
exact number
Also, hey Amidala,
Do you want to talk about how you
scripted a child
(Out of the safety*
Of the chamber,)
To fight your damn battle?
No one’s going to bring up that
unfortunate implication?
That’s not a mood killer
for you?
........
Open this
bunker....
Why?
Seriously
The bunker...
Is not that serious a deal
Seriously they were acting like this thing stays
infectious
for
forever
Like it has infinite viability
Also what about food and water?
What about medicine?
What about....
Er...
Goodbye Aniken
I’m sorry
child killer
was I supposed to sympathize with you?
Because I don’t
Also, ‘goodbye’?
From cutting the com?
Because literally
nothing else has been established about it?
Heck Ahsoka’s been running around with no protection and
is not dead
So clearly not that big of a deal
Like
she’s got a light cough
(And heavily developed eyebags somehow)
.......
No seriously
All she did was cut the com so
she could get some rest
That’s....literally all that seems to be established
(Yeah,
I know they’re trying to imply that she’s dying
But you need to establish-)
Power converter
How is that going to help?
“slow down Anakin,”
Again maybe he can
maybe he can’t
Literally nothing
Or possibly been a good establishing moment
about Obi-Wan’s enabling tendency
(And disregard for human
life,)
Or Anakin fighting against enabling
(Or the urge to
enable)
But nothing
“ they’re dying,”
Or have a light cough
and want to take a nap
Seriously
slow down you psycho
“Two steps back,”
Um, no
Like,
this could’ve been a good moment
About,
how Obi-Wan is trying to get him to enable or outright screw over the next generation
Trying
to
stall
him
Under the guise
of helpful
advice
But there’s just
nothing
“Will to jump,”
No, it
requires
the
personal
Account
ability
and
respect
(Of
yourself)
Mixed
with
the
sentience,
development
and
most
importantly,
Actualization
Of
An
Adult
Which
the
tone
refuses
to
commit
to
The conversation being as compelling as between two anthropomorphized blobs
Refusing
to
Hold
Anakin
Accountable
For
His
Actions
While
Obi-wan
is
also
let
off
too
light
[We
need
a
lot
more
mother
Gothal
and
less
kicked
puppy
dog)
As
well
as
internal
struggle
(Obi-wan
is
not
the
hero
in
this
one,
Movie)
There
is
no
good
enabler
“At
least
hear
me
out
on
this,”
Yeah
listen
to
the
narcissist.
(One
who
is
completely
ok
with
child
grooming.)
(Multiple
occasions)
Citizens
of
a
Llego
Oh so you have time for a
committee!
(This
is
why
you
don’t
trust
an
enabler (narc)
with
the
plans:
They
are
far
more
interested
in
getting
approval
(For
themselves!)
then
actually
fixing
the
problem
This
is
why
we
have
the
rule
of
five
So
some
asshole
doesn’t
slow
down
productivity
(among
other
things)
because
they
can’t
get
over
their
ego
(Or
the
benefit
of
humanity
over
themselves)
All the adults already know this thing
isn’t a ghost
And all the
kids can’t help
and shouldn’t be involved
This is literally
just an ego trip
for Obi-Wan
Nonsense
And this dude
Who clearly
Must’ve been
Alive
Or at least knowingly decided to spew this bullshit
Because no one‘s first thought is the supernatural
(Seriously)
(Who even bothers thinking about
that?)
(When you have a life to live)
(No hate)
Just there’s plenty of time to contemplate
death
(Don’t know why anyone would want to)
Without, you know, screwing up everyone
else
(Mostly)
Seriously, just don’t argue with
narcs
Just send them to accountability
(Be accountable yourself)
Okay
Angels
Shiny
What
WTF
Why
What
is
occurring.?
.....
Stole
our
moon
?
Also
seriously?
Is it really time for
prehistoric
chatter
about the long list of tox and baggage these guys have
accumulated?
You know where the problem is, you know it’s probably uninhabited
(This place looks
pretty damn ancient)
So, just...
Look I know why Obi-Wan isn’t doing it...
But seriously a waste of time for Skywalker to be
you know
fighting his inner demons
About
enabling
this
bullshit
As
an
adult
Which
he
is
written
as
With
actualization
[ ]
Long
sigh
Minus
Prime
Seriously
do
we
have
time
for
this?
Also what about that some thing another guy
Valley
Down
The
Thing
Nobody
ever
goes
that
way
Now on a different
planet
....
What
Milius
Prime
.......
Vulture
droids
........
Why?
.......
Don’t we have?
Argh
.......
my brain is honestly pretty fried at this point
That’s - that’s
too many details
...
most of them
irrelevant
Remote
control
Please...
Wrap
it
up
Okay
Alright
What-ever
Just...
get it over with
Lazar
Admitter
.....
Wait, what?
When was a
laser admitter
Brought
Up?
What
About
The
Milius...
Why...
(I fecking hate
Literary
(And plot)
Littering
Good
stories
live
by
Chekov’s
Gun
Die
by
the
accountability
scale
Which by
if two people die
then
two people must live
(Be born)
And that gun
better be
feckin fired
Because that
information
takes up
valuable
space
We were
Introduced
To the
Forbidden
Path
Thing...
A while
ago
On
the
same
planet
(Supposedly
somewhere
in
the
distance)
Now we’re
about to leave the planet..
Where’s the
gun shot....?
Seriously what’s in the distance?
Oh
so there’s somehow water
Also
everyone just fecking around
Great,
I care about none of these characters
Except
the
Baby
[Where’s
Jar-Jar?]
Aight
What
a
waste
Completely
their
own
fault
And
yours’
Child
killer!
(Or guess only
Asoka directly,)
And dragged
Jar jar into the situation
Like this is completely her
own fault
“Born to do,”
I’m sorry were you going for an actually serious
moment?
Like that was actually a surprisingly
self-aware moment
Shame we don’t know if that guy is dead
Or anything
about the situation
That would
make it
even the
tiniest bit
stressful
.......
The scene and everything I think it’s trying to
go for
Nah
You didn’t earn it
.....
“Sacrifice,”
Again, so he’s dead now??
Seriously, what
Who was that?
How?
How long?
???????
??
You
are
bad
at
setting
up
a
story
[The who what where are changes on a feckin
dime
The risks,
as such,
Are
non-existent
And no idea
What the heck is going
on
[besides a basic blueprint
of what I think the writers are trying to pull]
[from past experience]
(They literally didn’t set up anything)
(Anything)
(What-so-ever)
Must
believe
Must believe in
feckin what?
Padme told him not to open the
door
(For fuck all reason)
....
.......
What am I supposed to feel?
It’s literally no odds
No established risk...
“Ahsoka!”
Oh, she fell asleep
Feckin drama queen
Also you
you did that
Good job
“Amidala”
The feckin
child killer
.....
Argh
Whelp
Back to these frickers fricking around
Really
increases
the
feeling
of
those
nonexistent
odds
As
well
as
the
completely
non-consistent
pacing
...
Great
Okay
Just get it over with....
What...
Who things don’t look like what we saw
before...
Heck, they don’t even look like
vultures
“Vulture,”
Alright
[Rolls-
Eyes]
This works
Okay...
Aight
Yeah
no
Okay,
Guys..
Aight
Could’ve been out of satellite distance
Kid
Droids
.....
What-ever
....
Why are they celebrating?
They don’t know shit happened
[or maybe they do]
I don’t have the energy to bother with
narc logic
Just let it end...
Aight
“That you’re-
Dude
wrong clip
wrong order
....
Aight
Okay
Yeah
Sure
Okay
Oh so now they can open the door?.
“Padme,”
Aniken you are not a healer
Your a herb-getter at most
Oh so you have a very important person apparently didn’t have any
medical resources up to this point
Kinda bull
Opens eyes
[Not Romantic]
That’s bullshit
“I spoke with the medical droid,”
Would’ve been nice to
see that
Also, oh yeah well I was arguing
semantics about whether or not they had a healer
They totally did
They could’ve sent it a medical droid
Avoided did 90% of this bullshit
Full recovery
The dude who
hasn’t even gotten the Herbs?
Or not distributed them?
“I never lost faith in you,”
Bull
And the most stunted line ever
[which would make sense for a
child soldier.]
Adult?
Unlikely
Debatable
Dubious
“None of us did,”
Bull-shit
And speaking for a lot of people
That aren’t you
[Authority
Assume]
“ where we weren’t so sure,”
[Show
Don’t tell,]
“ well you did make it”
Despite none of this being established
Like I don’t think
she knew about the cure
And specifically told you
not to
[What kind of
tox....]
Aight
Okay
By
the
way
....
“Your padawan was brilliant..”
The CHILD I recklessly endangered
Ergh
Aight
Whatever
Get it over with
General
skywalker
Don’t
Care.
My
Lady
That
feckin
endangered
a
child
[Two]
Jar-Jar
surprisingly
still
ALIVE
after
that
incident
I heard you were quite a good child soldier
And like any other positively over involved groomer...
[Like I did with Anakin]
Can’t resist
the temptation
to screw over another generation
🖕
Training
AAAhhhh!
I was just joking!
Really starting them young
Obi-Won
[He really can’t- resist
The urge to drag someone into his
fucking-
Obi- won
Is
A
Narc
Confirmed
Feck
Him
Jar-
Jar
is
a
child
He
should
not
know
how
to
use
any
blaster
[aka
Gun]
[unfortunately thanks to
Princess Amidala*
* she’s a Senator
*i’m just
very done...
Aight
“ you did a fantastic job,”
You did a fantastic job
Nearly dying....
You supposed to be defenseless child
🖕
*Training
Grooming
“Yeah,”
What?
That was like a
goofy laugh
“I probably do deserve,”
Narc
Children
can’t
have
attitude
“But
not
all
of
it,”
Amidala
also
deserves
credit
for
ordering
you
into
danger
Padme,
high
five
for
endangering
children
Seriously
who
is
still
painting
them
as
the
good
guys?
They’re
Adults
They-
....
[ “Thank you”
For
fucking
nothing ]
....
I think I’m going to use my
most repeated comment for
this episode; Not deserved
On that
subject;
It follows the same
pattern of the last two
Episodes
* One
that
is
constantly
changing,
Just
before
Strike
territory,
For another
formula
that’s
a
different
degree
and
volume
(type)
of
mediocre
and
problematic
Saving it
from
a
strike
But
not
a
mediocre
episode
Unfortunately, maybe it’s because it’s the third one to try this, special attention must be drawn to the fact that they have no idea how to do this
While the bits that are pretty much
prepackaged are fine
The rest
struggles
Bringing to light a fundamental unaccountability
In accountability
By disregarding
what made it work in the first place
And throwing in the trope haphazardly
(With no thought to it’s
(in)conclusion)
Believing it to be sufficient enough
Without any of the
necessary set up
Characterization
Or emotion
With the mystery one, the set- up was erroneous, the “mystery,” rushed and over in 5, with the grace of a good villain
With this;
The “set up” doesn’t even get beyond the ground
Screwing up some of the
key important elements
- One; The cure’s on planet allowing for some environmental exploration, while maintaining realistic probability
- Two; The deadline for expiration is explicitly outlined, creating tension
- Three; The heart, comes for the fact that nobody wants anyone else dead and would rather see them be held accountable, (or live to be held accountable)
- Fourth; The effects are semi-consistent
- Fifth (unspoken); children are always vulnerable
(If a adult can survive it- neither can a kid- debatable]
And also; (Optional) The cure is
seen distributed for a more tangible sense of relief
You broke three of the five rules
The three Most important ones
As such;
The tone, pacing and tension
(Never mind the Heart,
Which I shutter
to think of,)
Flounder
like
a
(soon-to-be)
dead
fish
out
of
water
If you’re going to do a
pre-established plot
Do it
right
Don’t
cut
corners
And make it as
manufactured
as
packing
peanuts,
With
as
much
heart
(Emotional
Value)
0 notes
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