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asleep-in-the-keep-sideblog · 2 months

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Announcement: Anniversary

Just me talking about the future of the fic :)

First off, HAPPY ANNIVERSARY! Wow a whole year (plus extra) WITH (near) constant updates, that's crazy. More than I can say for my other fic... (it haunts me. I still plan to finish it but ouch).

First things first!

I wanted to update sooner (since I've had this written for a month now) but I was also working on a one shot to post at the same time. I was making great progress but then finals came round and I got burned out. They're finished now but I'm still burned out. I'll give a brief hint about it though since I'm a little excited and just wanna talk about it. So its a Dadzawa fic that's actually happy and ends with them as a family (unlike how it was in the last chapter lol). It was supposed to cheer people up and also be practice for writing them as a family and stuff. The Danny is very different from the main fic tho. The fic was also supposed to serve as an anniversary present for all you guys too, to thank you for reading and being here. I really wanted to finish in time but it kept getting bigger as I wrote. I do hope to post it this month tho, so keep an eye out for that!

Next thing!

On AO3 it shows that the fic is now apart of a series and has a chapter count. I talked about this in the notes of a previous chapter, but I had been wanting to do that for a while now. I want to have the next part of the series out by next year. I know I have been updating monthly now, but I'm gonna try to do twice a month if I can. I'm really excited and It want it done soon! I might do 2 chapters this month or will just count the one shot if I get lazy.

I also added the tags "full ghost Danny." Sorry to burst anyone's bubble that held on hope for Danny. Tbh the original plan was that his human half was still hiding inside him, just healing and small, but it was gonna show up in one of the chapters. The longer the fic went on, the more I started to rethink that. The human reveal, while good in the short run, would crumble some of the plot lines I had set up while also not contributing much to the rest of the plot. I am debating maybe doing a short series of "what if" where that is the case tho, just so people can get a taste. If I like it enough I might make it a full thing. Who knows.

Final thing!

(this paragraph is referencing the support on AO3)

Guys! Guys! Guys! Guys! Guys! Guys! Guys! Guys! Guys! Guys! Guys! This fic has 2k kudos????????!!!!!!! HOLY CRAP! WTF?!

That is so huge! Gahhhh! Man, I am always critical of my writing (I've gotten better) but wow to have that kind of support just in my face! Literally speechless. I always had the thought in the back of my mind that once the fic goes on for long enough people will start to see its flaws or get bored. That's true for some, but I keep seeing a lot of the same names again and again and I am grateful to you guys so much. That was also one of the reasons I wanted to do the one shot. I just want to keep giving you guys more content that you'll enjoy.

Thank you so much for being here, truly 💚

Good luck on finals if you got them!

#asleep in the keep #asleep in the keep extra #dp fic

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luvlyrv · 3 years

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Just Vacation Girlfriends (Seulgi x Fem!Reader)

Genre: Fake dating, fluff

Summary: You and Seulgi enter a precarious fake dating situation, hijinks ensue. Except the hijinks aren't light-hearted, but rather deeply personal and intimate experiences. What are you and Seulgi really?

Word Count: 2k

A/N: Hi, it has literally been 5 months since I last wrote lol, I'm sorry. It's not like I hate writing it's just that there were other things I could and had to do. I apologize for taking so long to upload again, especially for the amount of feedback I got for my first post! 68 followers and 90 notes! I know it may seem like rookie numbers to some but I really want to thank you all. I'm having my winter break now so I should be able to post a lot during this short period. If I'm lucky I may be able to semi-consistently post during the school year as well ;). Sorry if there are any grammar mistakes/wtf moments I'm writing at 3AM and have slept for two hours total for the past 40 hrs, cut me some slack please.

Date: 12/24/20

The chops of your knife against the cutting board were interrupted by your phone ringing. You stop making dinner as you look over your shoulder to your phone a couple inches away on the counter. Your eyebrow perked up as you read the caller ID, it was Seulgi. Of course, you immediately set your knife down to talk to her.

"Hey Seul, what's up?"

"Hi..." Seulgi began to yawn. "I just wanted to hear your voice today."

You can't help but to let out a small smile as you felt your face getting warmer. Luckily Seulgi wasn't actually there to tease you about it.

"Ah, well, here's my voice. Is it relaxing enough, your majesty?"

You can hear a faint and muffled sound of laughter from Seulgi before you hear her tired voice through the speaker again.

"Hm, well I guess that'll do. I'm actually calling to make sure you wanna come with us on vacation again."

"Of course I do, I've been going with you guys for years. I'll make sure it works with my schedule."

"Yeah, I know that and I'll send you the dates, it's just that..." Seulgi let out a long sigh, "there's some other things you need to know."

"And that would be?"

"Pretend to be my girlfriend."

"What?"

"Please, Y/N. It'll just be for a week. I know it's a lot to ask but I need it."

You're speechless for a bit and deliberate on what to say next. Not wanting to worry your friend with your silence you ended up just saying, "Yeah, uh okay, I can work with that... why though?"

"You know how dating is like. Not a lot of time, not a lot of privacy. My parents understand this but they're still worried you know? They worry about how my future will be like if I'm spending basically over a decade just working. Something about it takes time to find the right man, settling, babies, blah blah blah. If you pretend to date me that'll ease their worries and I won't even have to worry about a scandal since it isn't real and only my parents would know anyways. Besides... we're close enough where we can pull this off convincingly, right?"

You take a second to think. It was a strange situation to be in, but as far as you knew you would only have to pretend for the week you would spend with her family. Her family wouldn't be seeing either of you after then, and maybe you could also fake breakup if things get sticky. With Seulgi's last statement... it was true that you've been really close with her and her entire family since you were both little. All it would take would be amping up the friendly touches and banter.

"Yeah, we are. Alright. I guess we should iron out the details about our fake relationship later though. You kind of sound like shit. Rest up if you can."

"Talk to you soon, Y/N."

With that, Seulgi ended the call and you were left with dinner still unprepared and a lot on your mind.

* *

The plan was to go to the airport and fly out to the island with Seulgi, where you could rehearse your story until you would meet up with the rest of her family and go about the vacation as normal. Except for the not so minor detail of you having to be Seulgi's girlfriend.

Seulgi sits by the window as you sit next to her. You try to get comfortable, but you really can't. There's a churning mixture of nervousness in your stomach. Even though it was all pretend, it was hard to imagine yourself trying to make it look real. Although you and Seulgi both felt like it would be easy to pull it off convincingly... there was something you couldn't quite place tugging at your heart-strings.

Your thoughts are interrupted as you hear her sweet voice.

"When did we start dating?"

"Uhm, ah, I know this! It was... er-"

"July 7th."

Seulgi begins to look at you. Her eyes are filled with both a pleading look and a disappointed look. She starts quizzing all the little, and very fake, details of your relationship. You answer them correctly for the most part and Seulgi's mood seemed to improve knowing you weren't completely hopeless. You're starting to get into the swing of things when all of a sudden Seulgi asks something completely unexpected.

"And what's our favorite position in bed?"

You felt your face immediately heat up as your eyes opened wide in shock.

"I- I mean, uh, what?"

"K-kidding of course." Seulgi says this with a smile, yet she seems to shake a little. Maybe she was also surprised with her sudden crude sense of humor. She begins to reach down and grab a small book from her bag. "I think we'll be good for now, just relax until we get there."

You just nod your head in response and slip in your earbuds.

* *

Although it wasn't like you have never spent a vacation with Seulgi, things felt weird.

First was the way her family treated you, especially her parents. The both of you walked into the beach house hand in hand. Her parents were completely unbothered. Later that day when eating dinner, Seulgi decided it was time to announce your relationship. As the conversation at the dinner table seemed to finally be dying down, she set down her fork and began to talk.

"Guys, listen up, I've been holding onto this news for some time now, but I really wanted to do it when everyone could see each other. What I've been wanting to say is... " It seemed to you, that maybe just for a little moment, Seulgi was trying to steel her nerves.

"Y/N and I are dating."

Silence. The two of you were met with utter silence. It wasn't the type of condemning and judging silence, but rather one of indifference. Everyone seemed completely unbothered with this news. The silence was thankfully quickly broken by Seulgi's mom.

"Well, I'm glad you guys have finally sorted your feelings. I'm sure you're both very happy now." Her mom said it with a small but warm smile. Everyone else seemed to nod in agreement. You couldn't help but to ask, "No big congratulations? What about the fact that we're both girls? "

Seulgi's brother laughed a little before talking.

"I mean... sorry. We can act a bit more excited if that's what you want. It really is something to be celebratory about... it's just that you don't usually clap for a fish when it swims, right? You know what I mean? It's just all a bit... expected and natural. As for the 'we're both girls' I don't care, and everyone else probably doesn't either."

To say the least, that was not the reaction that you and Seulgi expected. After dinner the two of you were stuck trying to think about what it all meant. You guys were also both stuck with the fact that you'd share one room and one bed for the rest of the week.

Again, it wasn't like you haven't done things like share a bed with Seulgi before. It was just that the relationship business was getting stuck in your head. Everything normal suddenly felt dangerous. Things like even looking in Seulgi's way felt like it took caution. That night, it was decided that there would be a pillow barrier between the two of you.

By the third night the pillows were all on the floor as the you hung onto each other for warmth, finding comfort in the contours of the other's body.

Things like this kept on happening. You would set up arbitrary rules to feel normal again and destroy them all within a blink of an eye. You just kept on acting on things without intending to.

For example, the other day Seulgi woke up early to cook breakfast. You couldn't help but to feel the absence of her body and warmth and followed her out to the kitchen soon after. Even though you were in a half-asleep state your feet found their way behind Seulgi and your arms snaked around her waist.

You burrowed your face into the crook of her neck. Taking in that familiar and oh-so-comforting scent that is Kang Seulgi. Since when did her scent make you feel at home? Since when did you feel so at ease with her? You had a sneaking suspicion that it has been this way for a very, very long time.

These thoughts didn't matter though, as your body began to move with hers to the soft music she had playing from her phone. She didn't try to resist your touch at all. Instead, it seemed that she melted under your touch, with you seeing her shoulders dropping and feeling her backing in further to your embrace. Before you knew it the serene moment ended when Seulgi finally finished cooking breakfast.

You would frequently hold hands whenever the family was around, yet even though you could spend your free time wherever with whoever, you were attached to Seulgi's hip and she to yours. You two would always end up doing something together, or perhaps you would do nothing, and instead just enjoyed the fact that the other was there while quietly still holding hands.

Holding her hand quickly became your best comfort. Her soft and warm hands seemed to fit perfectly with yours, fitting together just the way you'd want them to. Something about her hands electrified you every time.

The once seemingly distinct line between platonic feelings and romantic feelings began to get blurrier and blurrier with each passing second. This doubt and confusion culminated when going on one of the last outings planned for the vacation.

Unfortunately, or perhaps fortunately, during the outing a spontaneous couple's event was hosted. Your mouth began to dry up as the host looked at you and Seulgi, urging each other to kiss.

As far as everyone else knew, you've been dating for a decent amount of time now. Enough of an amount of time for them to assume you had kissed already. You looked into Seulgi's eyes in distress. You could feel the host boring his eyes into you. You could feel practically everyone's eyes staring in anticipation.

Seulgi drew her body closer and that was when you knew your fate was sealed.

* *

A couple hours later and you're back at the house now. Laying in the bed you've shared for the past few nights you finally look at her. She looks back at you with waiting eyes. Slowly you reach your hand up from under the blankets and softly laid it on her soft cheek. She responds by placing hers on top of yours.

Staring at the deep brown of her eyes, you take it all in. You feel heat radiating from her body. You watch her body rise and fall with a mix of a calm yet eager breath. The close proximity that the two of you share is something that was typical, yet so different in the moment. With bated breath you finally say the unspoken words. The words that should've been said long ago. The air and sound barely passes through your lips.

"I love you."

The two of you close in, giving the lightest kiss in the world. There was barely any pressure but you could feel her lips touching yours. Even though you've kissed already, this one meant so much more. Even if this was such a small and innocent kiss, it was the shyness of it all, the realization that it means something that made your heartbeat race.

Putting your foreheads together, Seulgi said with a quiet voice.

"It's been like this since forever, hasn't it?"

"Yeah. Let's keep it that way."

In the back of your head you wonder, was this to please her parents or was this to please her?

#red velvet #red velvet kpop #red velvet seulgi #red velvet scenarios #red velvet imagines #red velvet oneshots #kang seulgi #seulgi #seulgi x reader #kang seulgi x reader #red velvet x reader #reader insert #kpop imagines #kpop scenarios #kpop writing #sm town

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writeiolite · 4 years

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a round of thanks ♡

i was gone for a little over a month writing commissions (and i’m still going) and during that time u guys were still here reading my stuff n being super supportive n kind ㅠㅠ i’m rly grateful that ppl enjoy my writing enough to read it even when i’m not actively posting, and that you guys deem it worthy enough to follow me too despite the inactivity! i can’t thank u enough for that, but i might as well start with this smol post!!

thank you for all the commissions + ko-fis milk teas!

!!!!! this is a big one! i wasn’t expecting to get so many like... ever LMFAO but i’ve gotten a BUNCH over time and im... speechless. thank you for liking my content that much more — from writing to astrology. i’m extremely grateful to those of you that have taken the time to help me build my writing style as well so that i can make sure my commissions meet (and hopefully exceed) expectations *cough* lookin @ u HQC *cough*. i’m always so excited to get commissions bc then i can rly test myself and talking with each of you about your plot ideas is SO much fun!!! so thank you thank you thank you!! for on-going commissions, i’ll be messaging you as i finish the ones before yours to get more details on your order ^^

thank you for bday gifts/fics!

i wrote little thank u notes on them all that i’ll be posting in the upcoming days between writing time ^^ they rly made me super duper happy and gave me some inspiration!! i can’t believe im surrounded by so many amazing creators like wow omg thank u

thank you for 2k + 3k on 딸기 pop!

when i last rb it, it had 1k!!! i missed these other milestones but i definitely appreciate them — i didn’t think 3k was smth any of my writing would achieve ㅎㅎㅎ thank you for breaking my expectations n giving that piece so much love!!

thank you for 1k on lust inc!

again, i last rb this at 800 and now she can join her other 1k sisters sfgkjhksh thank you so much for that!! i really loved writing this fic — it was super fun and exhilarating writing it all in one sitting under some weird time crunch — so im glad to see other people like it even a little bit :D

thank you for these note milestones!

i’m missing a bunch (u guys are wild wtf it was only a month hhh) but these are some i found while scrolling through!

400-700 on five cents

200-700 on APP

500-600 on all that’s his

400 on lady

200-300 on morning muse

200-300 on sticky

400 on maid for the job

100 on quite a few ch of WTF U!

100 on man of the moon

300 on highs and lows

200 on fun

thank you for 3k!

i’ll be posting a todoroki x f!reader x shinsou smut as a smol thank u!! pls keep an eye out for it over the next week or so (i hope whew)

thank you for 4k!

i’ll open up zodiac ships once i knock out the bigger commissions (which should be within the next 3 weeks)

thank you for 5k!

i have a special smau coming up that i’ll post soon!! gotta let todoroki and shinsou have their spotlight first hehe :3

this is really... baffling to me bc i legit was not posting anything LMFAO so for you guys to get me from 2k to 5k in a month ... wut goes on guys AHAHHA thank u omfg i have lots of fics to share with u all to make up for time lost!

thank you:

below are people that have been here for me this past month that i’m super grateful for. if you aren’t here, pls don’t be offended! i’m trying to go off the top of my head ㅠㅠ

@dorkyama @vventure @ushijimahayashi @estherwritess @loneveenas @mikwrites @w-yuren @ksyy @edensxgarden @blkjackals @myherowritings @msjdott @settersloveletters @hairbleachwhore @tsukkiscookies @spriteandnicotine @kingkags @gallickingun @shiio @nixhinoya @tamcitrus @natsuosfairy @hunntea @tainted-wine @janellion and the anon who commissioned lines c:

also!!! thank you to those of you that binged my writing during the time i wasn’t posting, left cute comments/message, and shared with friends!!! i’m just... speechless ASGSDJ

THANK YOU FOR EVERYTHING!!! ♡ ♡ ♡

#iolite in love

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agushadow · 6 years

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henlo!!! it’s me, your #1 yoongi toe stan! i finally hit 3k+ after being stuck on 2k for a long ass time and i realized that, today (may 23rd), my blog turned 7 months old :’) wow, time goes by so fast when you’re drooling over yoongi’s feet and tae’s mullet?

this blog has been a big shelter for me for the past few months. i remade because i wanted to share my love for bts and meet some people who i could scream about them with... i’ve had some rough times and being on here usually took my mind off it, specially because i met a lot of great and funny people, who i dare call my friends. i just wanna say thanks for the love and support!!! whether you made me laugh at memes at 4am or listened to a whole dramatic rant or if you just always reblog my content... i love you. ♡

anyways, i wanted to do something to thank all the mutuals who stayed with my chaotic & opinionated ass + celebrate all the new ones i’ve made recently... i’m specially happy that most content makers that i admire are now my mutuals (like wtf u guys? why do u bless me with your approval???). i was gonna do a mutual appreciation post, but i want to show some appreciation to a few awesome content makers whom i look up to!

normal: mutuals, aka owners of all my uwus, whom i’d die for

bolded: you make amazing content and you inspire me, pls notice me senpai

ps: i was gonna italicize my close friends and write cute little notes, but i love so many people and... if we’re close, you know what u mean to me by now! u know fam

a-e:

@acciosugas @apgujeon @aurjeon @agustwink @adore-jhope @aestaetical @alovemaze @arttaestic @agustdz @bangtqn @beui @blameblamebts @bwisou @bwima @bangtanssea @bangtansonyeotan @blooming-hoseok @bwintage @btsislovebtsislife @bts420 @blondejinismyreligion @breathejeon @brightbutnolongerbulletproofboys @chimchims @clairelions @celestial-jeon @chuulies @cyphergguk @cvltin @chivvl @citruskook @cyphersatoori @doona-baes @daegucrew @daedaegu @daeygu @dontsugacoatit @dearlyjeon @dearbangtansonyeondan @ddagust @dimplesknj @dreamytaehyungx @dreamyseokmin @euphoricbangtan @endearkim

f-j:

@fakelovrs @fakeluvjin @firstlovesgf @fierysuga @flowerjjk @flowerseoky @flowerjoonie @glitchyoongi @gukx @gayoongis @ggukbwi @goldenboysgoldenhearts @gukhopes @gcfkku @gfserendipity @gguk @gguksmyg @girl-meets-disrespect @glosuga @goldenkinghoseok @hobislobster @hoeseok @honeystae @hobi3s @hobies @hoseokb @hobioh @habeenki @heartmanjin @hercypher @heartmanjins @hersoutro @heavenlybangtan @hitman-trash @ho5eokie @holy-jinsus @hoseokx @hoseoksfakelover @hobisdaydreams @hobisuki @hobibout-that @hosseokss @ho-seoks @hoseoksmagic-shop @ixjhs @icingsuga @imyourserendipity @itshobisworld @iameveningfawn @icetaelemonade @illiterateunicorn @importantbusinessman @je0n @jeonbegins @jjks @jimiyoong @jeonify @jeongguk @jjilljj @jeonprince @jaayhope @jayhobe @jademyg @jeonsdear @jinsasleep @jiminsdna @jeonbus @jihopi @jeoncooky @jeoncrocs @jeonlov @jeonsberry @jihyesol @jhopi @jiminparke @j-hellnah @jiminkirk @jjimin-ssi @jjkstyles @jjjhope @jeonssrose @jkcypher @jmin @joeguk @jungshiii @just1day @junghoseok @jvnckles @jzeo @j1nsgf @j1nn1e @jesugaismyname @jins-kiss @jinspizzeria @jinsbts @jinfrombts @jhslesbian @jinbarista @jinuinely

k-p:

@kc-junghsk @kimdaily @kimseokjin @kstopping @ksjmygjhsknjpjmkthjjk @knjtae @kissingnamjoon @kthpluto @kookieshop @ktheaven @lyoutro @lobemaze @lytearlovebot @ly-taer @ly-tear @lethargicani @lhoseokl @listentohopeworld @lovelygeminis @loveablehobi @luminarypjm @lesbianiminyoongi @lvmze @min-yungii @minyggi @mygjhs @mygskths @mygdaegu @mochi-nochu @msgicshop @megjin @majinstic @magicshopmp4 @mazejin @mellowsuga @micdrxps @minsbutt @minyoongislaysme @misohobi @minyooing @mygkths @mygstears @nochuie @napmon @nctit @namjoon94bts @neiptune @neonjeon @neutralsuga @nochugguk @outrojk @oryus @outrtear @oddlytoxic @paradisemp3 @prkjimin @parkesjimin @peachyoonjin @piedparkjimin @pocketofyoonmin

q-u:

@raplinesgf @rosykook @rainyjeon @rmyoongis @rapliines @runchagloss @sugasuite @samwol @sosbts @softjeon @sapidsuga @screaminghoseok @seokin @suga-baepsae @sugarjins @seokjinlesbian @seokjoonies @sftae @singulaerity @sin-taehyung @sillyyoongi @singlularity @slutdropjin @smiley-yoongi @solastia @soekmin @springtaes @stray-bts-kids @softjiminies @softiejungkook @sugagifs @sugamonsta @sugasideup @sunshine-hopes @suga-inbloom @syubjoon @syubdaegu @taetaes @tahyungs @taescult @taetaez @tearhobi @taegisus @taesflower @taegi @taev @teashyung @thiccies @taehyc @taehyeontan @the-killingmoon @taesamor @taeante @taetaetrashhh @uhhuhlistenboy @uknowbts @vanillalattaes @velvethoseok @vangtae @vangtae @violentlypjm @vantedoll @wingscouldfly @winemom-yoongi @yoonseok @yoonggi @yoongitrsh @yyoongiis @yoongi-yoongs @yccnseok @yoongiscandyshop @yoongiscookie

#s:

@1untrue @1stlove @1ostinparadise @1stae @2ndloves @724148atdawn

#ff #uhhhh can u pls tell me if tumblr @ u???#bc my fucking blog is fucking being a bitch and saying theres no link lmao #i hate tumblr y am i still here #also!!!! sorry if i forgot anyone... the url changes drove me crazy doing this so i may have forgotten some1

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fuck-customers · 6 years

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Few Months worth of BS

So a mix of be hardly getting on tumblr anymore and submissions being closed whenever I am on has caused a pileup of BS stories from both jobs, enjoy.

Note- Job 1 is gas station cashier, job 2 is Tiny SeaTzars

1. Job 1- it’s like 9am, i’m barely awake and this dude who looks old enough to be my dad comes in. He’s nice enough, pleasant guy, buys his stuff and leaves. Comes back in like 5 seconds later to ask if i’m married. I was 17 at the time so I said “Sir, i’m 17.” and he immediately backpedaled thank the heavens. Creepy enough, yeah? Nope! His first thought was to say “I’m so sorry, it’s just my wife recently passed and I’ve been looking.” To which my manager (my mom) pops around the corner and says “Well you’re looking in the wrong places sugar.” In a lovely tone that screamed “You’re 3 seconds from joining your wife”. He left redder than a tomato and that incident has become a running joke with everyone.

2. Job 1- Slow day so far, mostly just pissers. (peeps who use the bathroom and don’t buy anything) Dude comes in looking like hell. Fills his own cup up from our fountain and gets pissy when it rings up a whopping $2, says it’s a refill. I tell him we don’t have refill prices. So he goes and switches it out to one of our cups. Then he wants to pay with a card, gets even more pissy when I tell him there’s a $5 minimum on cards, says “that’s bullshit, since when?” Well ever since the card fees aren’t worth it on under $5 purchases, so always. Best part of that is we have LARGE signs on both sides of the door and ON THE FRONT of the fountain machine that say “Due to fees, there is a five dollar minimum purchase requirement on all cards, thank you for your cooperation!” He gets pissed beyond words, my manager tries getting him to calm down, he says “Not right now, you really don’t know the kind of day i’m having.” Things escalated quick and next thing I know he throws his full cup of soda on the floor and stormed out cussing up a storm. I ran after him and got his plate number as my manager called the cops but they couldn’t get anything from it so he’s never been found and ugh. Prick. Prick is all I can say.

3. Job 2- Someone actually called Tiny SeaTzars to ask for the hours of the CFK (backwards) next door. Just… really?

4. Job 2- We have a new dude, on like his second week. If a pizza is expired (been in the box for over an hour) we workers can eat it. Boy he was happy about that. Thing is, he’s almost always eating. Wasn’t working Friday but got told Saturday. It’s about 6pm, y'know, near peak rush hour when we can easily make a $2k hour, and he’s in the back leisurely eating pizza. Everyone else is busting their ass and he’s eating. Makeline dude had to leave his post to get sauce (because SOMEONE wasn’t at his post where he could be asked to get it for him so makeline doesn’t have to LEAVE THEIR POST IN THE MIDDLE OF A RUSH) and found him and chews him out, and thankfully he got a writeup for it. But just??? Bruh what level of stupidity/obliviousness do you gotta be on to see everyone rushing and running around you and think “Oh, time to eat some pizza.” ????

4. Job 1- Lady I don’t know comes up to the pump and sets of the bell that says someone’s trying to get gas. We have some regulars that we just release it and they’re trusted to come in and pay after, otherwise we’re prepay. However, I have never seen this chick before since I’ve worked here so not doing that. I tap her pump on my screen to shut it up and wait for her to come in. She does, all smiles, and says hi. I ask what I could help her with, she gets a confused look on her face and says “I need gas.” and I tell her we’re prepay. Bitch mode starts to wind up and she asks in a pissy voice “Really? Since when?” and I tell her “Since the station opened.” and then she says “Hmph, okay, I’ll talk to Sean (store owner) about that.” and leaves. Like, okay? We’re prepay, you’re not gonna change that by talking to the boss, who will tell you we are prepay. I don’t get people who think they can namedrop my boss to scare me??? Like “I know Sean.” Yeah, he runs a mechanic shop, half the county knows him, your point?? Best part is when they mispronounce his name or get it entirely wrong. “Yeah, me and Shane have been friends since we were kids.” Well good for you and Shane, but that ain’t helping you with SEAN.

5. Job 2- Lady calls in a 10 pizza order to be picked up the next day at 10am. We don’t open until 10:30. I try telling her and she get’s angry but tried meeting in the middle for 10:15. Talked to my managers and they said no way before 10:30. Tell her and she gets so pissed. “For such a big order you can’t get there 15 minutes early to open?” Okay first of all, do you really believe that we get here at 10:30 and open up? What the fuck are we going to sell?? We need to count down the registers, prep the toppings, make sheetouts and stock the hotboxes. We’re here at 6am or better just so we CAN open up at 10:30. We can’t just open the doors at 10:15 because if there’s more customers waiting around we’ll have to serve them when we’re NOT ready because we let you in, and then it snowballs into “well you were open this early yesterday/last week/blahblah” and then we get in trouble. In the end she cancelled her order and asked for corporates number.

6. Job 2- Sunday after-church rush. Coworker calls in to ask for when he works next. Manager flat out tells him to get up and come check for himself because we can’t stop and look for him right now and hangs up. Seriously dude, literally EVERYONE knows to take a picture of the schedule when it’s posted. You hang around for half an hour before you leave every day anyway so wtf is stopping you from being an adult and taking a picture of your hours?? He called back like three times over the next few hours and we finally slowed down and told him but my god how stubborn and lazy do you have to be.

7. Job 1- Dude and his friend come in, one goes the the bathroom, the other gets some candy (which is RIGHT on the other side of my counter) and then goes looking around the shelves for other stuff. Buddy comes back to pay for gas and other guy leaves. I tell bathroom boy to hold on and I do a quick survey of the shelves find nothing, then go out to their car and see candy snatcher reclined in the seat eating the Reese’s he just took. I tapped on the window and the dude about jumped a foot in the air. I said “So, do you wanna pay for that or should I just go on and call the cops on you for shoplifting?” and luckily the dude doesn’t try fighting it and comes back in and tells his friend to pay for it. Friend is notably pissed and just glares at him. Tells me to just put whatever change is left after the candy in gas and heads out. Sincerely hope his friend at least thunked him in the back of the head for trying, and failing, at being a petty candy thief.

8. Job 2- Ever since I’ve gotten glasses my eyes have been bloodshot almost a constant 24/7. Eyedrops clear it up for maybe an hour or two. The first few days the “are you high” question and jokes were kinda funny and amusing, but it’s been two months and it’s still going on. I would just stop wearing my glasses but I need them to legally drive (astigmatism in both eyes) so ugh.

9. Job 1- Once again, the station is prepay. It’s written on every pump in very large letters above every handle. Please tell me why these 5 asian guys (I think relevant? They didn’t seem to understand me well so maybe language block?) could not get it through their heads that they have to pay before they get their gas. They come in saying the pump isn’t working, I say we’re prepay, you have to pay before you get it. One of them goes to hand me his card and I ask how much in gas he’d like. Confusion. Ended up having to explain what prepay was (felt like a tool because of it) and they ended up leaving saying “Okay, we go to station down the street.” And I just.. Okay? Every station in the county is prepay but okay, you do you. Honestly this is more of a “I hope I didn’t offend them” than a fuck them thing. Felt bad I couldn’t help them.

10. Job 2- We ran out of green peppers, so one of our supremes is off the menu unless they’re fine with no peppers. Dude calls and wants the pepper supreme. I tell him we’re out of green pepper and he goes into upset toddler mode.

Him: “Out of peppers, are you kidding me? How does that even happen?!”

Me: “Well, it’s kinda a supply and demand thing, Sir. If it’s a popular topping we’ll run out of it quick.”

H: “How can you run out of peppers it’s a pizza store you’d think you’d be able to tell when to order more of a topping!!”

And we don’t order it ourselves? We take count and tell our District Manager that we need things and he’s supposed to order them for us? (Dumb system I know but it’s what’s in place)

In the end he asked for a manager and just hung up when he said the same thing. Found out he left a review on google about us. “Horribly unprepaired for the simplest of orders.” okay buddy, take the one star review and shove it up your ass.

11. Job 2- This one girl I go to school with got hired on. She seemed nice enough, we never talked before but apparently she knew me. She’s a decent worker (few nit-picky things, nothing bad) but… She makes me want to hit her sometimes. I get it, you’re trying to be funny/bubbly/joking/whatever, but I don’t know you well enough for you to be making jokes off of my appearance? I’m aware I that have a slightly larger than average head, I don’t like attention being drawn to it, especially randomly? We’re stretching dough and she just randomly says “You got a big ass head you know that? A big ass head.” and laughs. Like… Thanks, it’s not like that was a point of ridicule in the past or anything. And then while we’re washing dishes she gets mad and threatens to beat me for, wait for it, splashing her with water.

At the sink.

While doing dishes.

And she’s too extra with her reactions. Little extra is funny, I admit, but she is over the top. I was washing deep dish pans and a flake of bread flew off and hit her with some water. She spat and did that little “pthptpthpthtpht” thing for almost an entire minute, then went on to say “We gonna throw hands if you do that again” I just… Kindly shut the fuck up and let me to dishes by myself if you’re gonna be such an extra [word that almost got this post deleted] like that okay? Just kindly fuck off.

I have plenty more but I feel like this post is too long as is. Enjoy my suffering and expect more to come.

#submissions #fuck customers #cashier problems #fuck coworkers #submission

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mostfunnystuff247-blog · 6 years

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5 Times Video Games Tackled Mature Issues (And Failed Hard)

Continue Reading Below Advertisement One of the big baddies in the game is Buck, an American expat who forces you to run around doing missions for him in exchange for information on your kidnapped brother. At the end of this story, it turns out that Buck had your brother tied up in his basement the whole time. Oh, and it's subsequently revealed that Buck repeatedly sexually assaulted him. There's pretty much no reason for this reveal, as we've never met the brother character before this scene and it's already established that Buck is terrible. It seems like literally any second pair of eyes on this script would have given the note "So this guy you already dealt with did rape earlier? What's the fucking payoff for that?" Sony Computer EntertainmentIt's the classic story structure of rising action, resolution, rape discovery, nothing. When a game journalist for Rock, Paper, Shotgun confronted the writer of the game about this, he tried to claim that the scene was glossed over on purpose. You see, it was actually commentary on how we brush off sexual violence against female characters, and the scene was meant to ... make you uncomfortable? Maybe? Probably that, sure! Continue Reading Below Advertisement The rest of the interview is mostly the writer excitedly explaining his own clumsy references. He seems to think that every gross cliche in his story is secretly a commentary on gross cliches. If only you were sophisticated enough to decipher all of the game's Kubrickian puzzles while also crafting its many wallets, you would have gotten this. If you'd like to learn more, please enroll in any prestigious university's senior-level Far Cry 3 course.

1 Bioshock Infinite's Unusually Heavy-Handed Take On Racism Ends With "But Really, Both Sides Are The Same"

Bioshock Infinite takes place in a dystopian city in the sky called Columbia. The place is run by the Founders, an ultra right-wing group of people who store all their cash and sandwiches in public trash cans. Everything in the city is built around white supremacy and nationalism: There are separate bathrooms for different races, minorities are mainly servants and janitors, and the first choice your character must make is whether or not to stone a couple who dared to enjoy an interracial relationship at a family carnival. The story is very clear with its intentions. It's not subtle, like the layered ironic symbolism of, say, Far Cry 3. 2K Games Continue Reading Below Advertisement The city is besieged by a rebel faction that hates everything the Founders stand for. They are the Vox Populi, led by a charismatic African American woman named Daisy Fitzroy. Daisy is out to end the Founders for good after being framed for the murder of the First Lady. Even though your character isn't directly involved in the conflict, you encounter battles between the two sides, and are taught throughout the game to sympathize with the Vox. And then Daisy is shown to be willing to go ... a bit far to achieve the group's goals. And when we say "a bit far," we're talking about terrorism and child murder. She executes a business tycoon and holds his child at gunpoint until your partner takes her out to save the kid. 2K Games"Listen to me, I'm from the future. This kid is totally going to grow up to be Hitler." Continue Reading Below Advertisement By the end of the game, you're fighting both the Founders and the Vox Populi. Suddenly the theme changes from "racism is obviously bad," to "but you know, there are very bad people ... on both sides." It's worth mentioning that the DLC tries to retcon this into some kind of "I had to do evil for the greater good" deal. Because all art is improved by going back in and adding a convoluted semi-apology for everything you did initially. Oh, and toss in some dewbacks while you're there. No one ever puts in enough dewbacks in the first draft. LucasfilmNope. More. Still more. More, damn you! Chris has a new party game called Cheer Up! which you can get right now! (Download it for free here!) Wes Corwin is a stand-up comedian currently based in Dallas. You can like him on Facebook, follow him on Twitter, or if you live in Dallas and enjoy comedy and alcohol, check out his weekly show at Noble Rey Brewery on Thursdays at 7:30 p.m. He also has a Real Rob fan podcast called When Keeping It Real Goes Rob, which has more listeners than it should. Support Cracked's journalism with a visit to our Contribution Page. Please and thank you. For more, check out 5 Totally WTF Times Real-World Problems Invaded Video Games and 6 Video Games That Made Sexism A Selling Point. Hey. You. Follow us on Facebook. Read the full article

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