#and idk what i'm supposed to write about. not saying the depression isn't playing a role too but damn am i not excited about this | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

thranduilland · 1 year

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Head canon that started out with @msgeekstyle as a cracky 'haha, but what if?!' that has slowly started to consume my life. I'll have to write fic for it after I finish my fae Hob series but...

Hob as the spawn of Lucifer. His dad was some human, Hob never found out who. They spent their entire life hiding out in Hell, affectionally referred to as 'the Hope in Hell' because of how much everyone loved them. Then, into their 20s-30s they were like 'mother, I'm off to the human realm, I want to explore' and Lucifer is like '... you're just going to break out if I try to ground you here, aren't you?' and Hob is like 'what can I say, mother? You are the original rebel and I take after you greatly' and Lucifer is like 'God did this to me on purpose! Fine!! You can go! Be careful!!'

Hob hanging about with the humans, getting into some of their battles. Falling in love with their innovation and persistence. Stubbornly ignoring the baby demons Lucifer sent along to keep an eye on him.

1389 comes along, Hob's human friends have dragged him along to a pub. They're all chatting about death, because why the fuck not? and Hob decides to play devil's advocate and declare that he's simply never gonna die. Death is stupid and he has far more interesting shit to get up to.

Dream and Death are intrigued by him, because there is just... something about him. They have their wager and Dream goes to inform Hob, who has no idea who he is talking to but is like 'yeah, I'm game for this! :D ' and agrees to meet back in the pub in a hundred years.

Hob trots off back to Hell like 'Mother, I made a magical friend! We're going to meet in a hundred years to talk about my life' and Lucifer is like '... who is this person?' and Hob is just 'dunno, anyway, gotta run, promised I'd help my human friends with something!!' Lucifer tries to ask Hob's minders who the stranger was, but they're young enough they have never met Dream or Death before so they're like 'idk.'

The 1489 meeting happens as per canon and Hob has a moment where he is actually genuinely afraid he has made a deal with one of his mum's demons, though he's sure they all would know better than to fuck with him like that. So, he's really relieved when Dream clarifies it's nothing like that. Hob trots off back to Hell to tell his mother about his meeting with his stranger. She again is like 'wtf is it ?!' and he's like 'dunno!! Gotta run! :D' and she asks his minders again and they're like 'dunno', cos they still have no fucking clue who Dream is. Lucifer sighs about it and sends Crowley to keep an eye on him, because Crowley is old enough to have met basically every magical being that it could be. Crowley is like 'yeah, alright, I'll do it.'

1589 comes around. Crowley has already figured out that the mystery stranger isn't a danger to Hob, because if he was he'd have already done something to him at either their first meeting or their second. So he spends the time indulgently watching Aziraphale drink people under the table the whole night. They head on back to Hell and Lucifer is like 'so who was it?!' and Crowley is like 'oh, didn't see, I was busy keeping an angel of the Lord from noticing Hope's presence' and Lucifer is like '... fair argument. Fine. Do better next time!' and Crowley is like 'yep, 100% will do that!'

1600s come along, Eleanor and Robyn die and Hob goes into a full on bout of depression. Crowley has to dig him out of the river when they drown him as a witch. He gets quietly handed over to Aziraphale who plies him with tea and food and books to try and perk him up a bit, but it doesn't work, and he wanders off back into the streets of London. 1689 meeting comes along, Crowley is busy searching for him and has completely forgotten that the meeting was supposed to take place, else he woulda gone straight there. Hob doesn't go back to Hell to tell Lucifer about it, so she doesn't get an gossip from that session and when she asks Crowley about it he's just like '... he's having a rough time, can't chat long!'

1700s comes along and Hob has thrown himself into the shipping business, ignoring the demonic influence riddled throughout every single point of it. The influence is familiar to him, he grew up surrounded by it, so it's comfortable for him, familiar. So he stays. Has his 1789 meeting with Dream, where Dream tells him it's wrong and initially he's defensive, because who the hell does Dream think he is?!? but then he folds to it, decides to consider it more in depth later... they have their fight with Lady Constantine (Crowley was busy dismantling the carriage outside while the fight was occurring).

Hob goes back to Hell and tells Lucfer about it. She's livid that he got attacked, but he's just like 'nah, it was great and I ALMOST got a name out of my stranger, I'm sure of it!!' and Lucifer is like to Crowley 'did you see who they were finally?' and Crowley is like 'nah, I was busy destroying the carriage so they couldn't get away' and she's like '... fine, I'll allow it...'

1889 comes around. Crowley has a prior engagement with Aziraphale so some other smuck demon gets sent to watch over Hob. Hob doesn't return to Hell after the meeting cos he's too busy drinking his sorrows, but the minor demon does return after Crowley picks up their shift and they're like to Lucifer 'uhm, still don't know who they are, but they're an asshole and they broke Hope's heart D:' and Lucifer is like 'WHAT?! I am going to destroy them!! Whoever they are!!'

Dream doesn't show for the 1989 meeting, obvs. Crowley reports this to Lucifer who is like 'oh, I really am going to ruin them. Just absolutely smite them!! who do they think they are?!?! Playing with my son's heart like this?!?' Lucifer sends Hob a Hell Hound to try to cheer him up, but he sends it back and asks for a Hell Cat instead, Lucifer is like '... yeah sure, okay'. Hob immediately names his Hell Cat 'Eye in the Dark' and it becomes a ball of black fur, that is a stealthy beast of prey. Lucifer is like 'did you have to name it like that?!' and Hob is like 'what's wrong with that?!?!'

Somewhere around this time, Lucifer gives birth to Adam and the events of Good Omens start to kick into play, so some other poor smuck demons get stuck watching Hob, because Crowley is busy watching over Warlock, who he thinks is the Antichrist. Lucifer sends out a Hell Hound for Adam, who names it Dog. Lucifer hearing about this sends Hob a message like 'I take it back. Eye in the Dark is a respectable name for a Hell Creature, please impart this knowledge to your baby brother, who named their's 'Dog!' Hob thinks that is hilarious.

The Apocalypse that Wasn't happens a few months before Dream escapes. Crowley, following the events of the Not Apocalypse gets a message to Lucifer like 'you still want me to keep an eye on the Hell Spawns or nah?! I'm officially off the clock, otherwise' and Lucifer is like '... you know what?!? Yes, keep an eye on them for me and I'll grant you a pardon' and so Crowley continues to check in on Hob, Warlock, and Adam. Hob has basically adopted Warlock as his own baby brother, and dotes upon both boys... and all their friends.

Dream comes back. Has his duel with Lucifer, neither of them knowing about the other's connection to Hob. Dream still wins with Hope, which Lucifer takes hard because like... that's her son, not that Dream knows that. Dream leaves and continues on his canon path, talks with Death, gets nudged to come find Hob.

They meet at the New Inn as per canon, but they agree to keep meeting. Dream pops in at random times and they start dating. Hob misses a check in with Crowley one day because he's busy in bed with Dream.

Crowley bursts into the apartment like 'Hell Spawn?!?!?! Where are you Hell Spawn?!? You can't do this to me, Hell Spawn! I can't tell your mother that I lost another of her sons on my watch!! Don't do that to me, Hell Spawn!!' and Hob is like 'ugh!! I'm fine, Uncle Crowley, go away!!!' and Crowley is like 'nope. Not until I have seen for myself that you are not dying!! I have a duty of care, Hell Spawn!!' and Hob is like 'I AM A GROWN MAN!!' but he stomps out to the living room anyway like 'See?!?! Not dying. Now fuck off, please!!'

Crowley is like 'alright, I will go, but next time, text me, Hell Spawn. You can't just expect me to- Hell Spawn!!! Get behind me!!!!' because Dream has wandered in from behind Hob and Crowley a) knows who Dream is and b) is aware that Dream is on the DNI list for Hell. Hob is like 'what are you doing?! that's just my boyfriend!!' and Crowley is like 'YOU ARE DATING DREAM OF THE ENDLESS?!?!?!' and Hob is like 'His name is Morpheus!!!!' Dream is like '?!?!?!?' about the entire thing. Crowley is like 'Just wait until your mother hears about this!! Cannot believe-!! She is going to slaughter me!! Then she's going to slaughter him!!! then you're going to be grounded forever!!!' and Hob is like 'what are you on about?!'

Crowley eventually leaves, Dream and Hob awkwardly have to explain things to each other, including that one time like 'oh yeah, I beat your mother in duel by apparently invoking you?!?!'

Bonus scene 1:

Dream staring at Eye in the Dark, before he learns of Hob's true nature like 'Why do you have a Hell Cat?!' and Hob is like 'What?! That's just Eye in the Dark, she is a sweetheart!!! :D' Eye in the Dark meanwhile is hissing at Dream like 'hurt him and you won't see me coming!!!' and Dream is like 'So noted, little sister, I mean him no harm...'

Bonus scene 2:

Jed: Who are they, Uncle Dream?

Hob: Oh, these are my little brothers, Warlock and Adam.

Adam: I'm the Antichrist.

Warlock: Former Antichrist.

Adam: Well...

Jed: ...

Adam: Hey, wanna hear that time I almost destroyed the world?!?!?!

Rose: Oh, wow, yeah, they're definitely family.

Dream: !!

#Dreamling #Hob Gadling #Dream of the Endless #Hob was a spawn of Lucifer all along #Hob was Lucifer's son #Good Omens #Crowley #Aziraphale

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aerltarg · 3 years

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Maybe this is a stupid question, buuuuut:

I just can't imagine a world that Rhaegar comes back from the Trident, wins the war and becomes king. No, I'm not a anti Rhaegar, matter of fact I like him very much, I'm just can imagine how would Lya, little Jon, this whole affair, would settle in the capital. The norm that fics (at least those I read) tend to follow is to make Rhaegar:

1. A douche, paranoid and destiny-obessed king.

2. Completely incompetent, aloof monarch, that deep down has a heart of gold, but can't really be understood.

I mean, isn't he supposed to be a scholar since he was a kid? What's are your thoughts about it?

oh, yeah, i can totally understand this! it's is the whole point in canon actually, "the wrong man came back from the trident". you would expect a hero win against his antagonist and have a happy ending w his lady love but it doesn't happen. instead the subversion happens to them with rhaegar being killed by robert who becomes obviously a shitty king and lyanna dying after him. they were never supposed to have happy ending, they were created as tragic and doomed and dead from the beginning for the whole plot to start, jon to have his parentage mystery and dany to take the passed baton as the last dragon, prophesied savoir and the heir who has to carry entire house on her back now.

as for the realistic rhaegar wins aus that's the difficult question. tbh we just don't know enough abt their situation, plans and wishes. you see, e.g. in agot we can be right in ned's head and see his motivations, what he was thinking abt, what he was planning, what he was hoping to do. but if his story was told the way rhaegar's was i bet he would have his own crowd of haters and ~intellectuals~ jumping out every two seconds w their "hot takes" how actually all hints abt what rlly happened (ned being a good man w his own sense of honour, justice and experiences affecting him and the deal w cersei's children) doesn't matter and he was an ambitious prick, planned to grasp the power by being joffrey's regent and make his daughter sansa queen. (you can actually insert there any bullshit and still don't reach the level of stupidity of such "hot takes" this fandom loves so much lmao). also he would be blamed to the hell and beyond for being too stupid and not foreseeing the future and actions of other ppl bc ofc after everything happened it's so easy to say what was so obvious to notice. also they would say that the deaths of his men and horrible fates of his kids are 100% his fault and even straight up say he killed them lmao. i can rant abt it for hours so yeah. this is a situation w too many unknown variables bc it depends too much on actions of too many characters we don't know enough abt. the only thing it's possible to tell for sure is the fact that there couldn't be any perfect solutions since things got too complicated at this point.

such fics as you've mentioned tho are just a part of this dumb fanon where rhaegar is "too prophecy obsessed"/"incapable of love"/shrodinger's rhaegar both smart and stupid at the same time/whatever/all of this combined lmfao. the man was notably intelligent from the early age as you've absolutely rightly mentioned, his guesses abt himself being tptwp have nothing to do w egocentrism as some parts of the fandom would want us all to believe unless he wouldn't be so reasonable abt it and later on, after so many years, wouldn't have changed his mind and thought his son could be tptwp.

and literally fuck all antis that think you shouldn't consider prophecies that hold real power in this fantasy world lol. you know, aegon the conqueror was said to be motivated (or at least partly) to unify westeros by the prophecy and still got the treatment of perfect/maximum close to perfect figure of a leader everyone should look up to from the narrative and grrm. prophecy obsessed much, huh? i don't even talk abt all these parallels between him and rhaegar grrm put there not for bitches to ignore them completely! and i will never get tired of reminding that dismissing prophecies is UNWISE for targaryens of all people. the house whose story is built on the dream of young daenys and her father aenar that listened to her despite common sense (or what local "anti magic"/"anti prophecies" clowns consider to be common sense). targs would be as dead as the rest of dragonlords if not for daenys the dreamer. who else in the world has as many reasons to take prophecies seriously as them?

yet antis out there act as if rhaegar is one dimensional weirdo whose every character trait is abt mf ~prophecy obsession~. like how can they miss one of the main points so badly?? the game of thrones distracts ppl from the real danger beyond the wall, yk, the one rhaegar was aware of and meant to deal with. there wouldn't be such a problem if he became king and had as many years of head start before ice zombies apocalypse as ignorant bobby b did. rhaegar had to die just for westeros to sink in shit and our main heroes to save everyone to make this story more epic LMAO

so yeah, too many ppl portray rhaegar as this one dimensional robotic creature without any knowledge of what feelings are idk even for what reason. it seems these ppl can't read for real bc rhaegar was not only intelligent af as well as dutiful ("it seems i must be a warrior" but "he loved his harp more than his lance") but also. ugh emotional?? my boy had constant emo sessions w brooding at ruins of summerhall, sleeping out there beneath the stars all alone and writing songs that made all women cry. does it sound as someone who "isn't capable of love" lol? folks act as if he was completely heartless from the day he was born (bc he didnt play w other kids ig??) but in reality their emotional range is less than the one of a spoon in comparison to rhaegar's lol. i'm not even gonna address the horrible attitude of demonizing him for his implied depression, vile clowns never listen to themselves when they talk abt targaryens and their "madness".

tldr; these fics are mostly lame af and suck at characterization if they're making rhaegar like that lol. anyway his character isn't abt being a good or a bad king, it's abt being a would-be-king for characters in books and readers in reality to sigh over his tragic aura and pretty aesthetic abt how it could've been. however, grrm clearly doesn't write rhaegar as evil or incapable as some parts of the fandom would want to try to persuade others. realistically speaking in the scenario where he wins there couldn't be any perfect decisions but it's a territory of speculations on thin air and lit nothing more since canon doesn't provide us with enough information to rlly theorize anything instead of building biased headcanons some ppl call "analysis".

but remember what barristan said about rhaegar while practically watching him all his life, from a literal baby to the man grown:

“I know little of Rhaegar. Only the tales Viserys told, and he was a little boy when our brother died. What was he truly like?”

The old man considered a moment. “Able. That above all. Determined, deliberate, dutiful, single-minded.” (ASOS, Daenerys I)

“Prince Rhaegar’s prowess was unquestioned, but he seldom entered the lists. He never loved the song of swords the way that Robert did, or Jaime Lannister. It was something he had to do, a task the world had set him. He did it well, for he did everything well. That was his nature. But he took no joy in it. Men said that he loved his harp much better than his lance.” (ASOS, Daenerys IV)

#thank you for the ask!!!#hope it didnt get too long and rambly afshsjsjs #once started talking its hard to shut up 😂#and im sorry for any possible mistakes #.txt #rhaegar targaryen #targnation #mypost #fandom wank #anti antis #majorton #*answered #asks

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fineillsignup · 7 years

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Ya it pisses me off that characters act like Oro isn't the absolute scum of the earth when near him. Like I get it is poor writing and Kishi just isn't looking that deep into it, but I struggle to ignore it. My mind keeps demanding how Naruto just strolls up in this guys lab, like it's nothing? I also don't get Oro backstory either, like are his parents dying supposed to explain his totally twisted nature? I'm more forgiving of nice AU Madara, because he showed signs of goodness, but Oro, idk XD

Oro is an out and out monster. It’s not like this guy did just one war crime. He kidnapped, experimented on, killed or allowed to die who knows how many children (at least a few dozen that we know about); as well as teenagers like Suigetsu and Juugo and adults; preyed upon the vulnerable and outcast; was directly responsible for Konoha Crush, which killed (according to Kishimoto) half of the Konoha shinobi. Half!!! Imagine that half of the people you know are killed and the person responsible feels no remorse about their deaths, is never punished, and is walking around basically free, toying with his “guard”. Would you find that as acceptable as the Naruto characters seem to?

And he’s still. experimenting. on. children?!

And then Gaiden, woo boy. “Yeah, this is fine, nothing to be done about this. Oro is actually directly responsible for the creation of the villain we’re currently facing, and is still doing the same kind of sadistic medical experimentation that created Shin, but who cares? Not us!”

That doesn’t even get into Taka, Granted that Taka aren’t typical heroes at the end of 699, that still doesn’t mean that it makes sense for Juugo and Karin to continue to assist Oro in his actions; and as for Suigetsu, doesn’t he hate Oro for what Oro did to him? In the closing part of the GNW, them cooperating made sense, but how the hell would they all still be sticking around 15 years later?

Kishimoto obviously really likes Orochimaru, given the major role that the snake bastard played in both of the post 699 mangas that Kishimoto chose to do himself. And how he likes him is as an unrepentant villain.

Kishimoto chose to let novelists and SP handle Naruto’s romance, his wedding, Sai finding his place in the new world, Shikamaru’s romance, a story about Kakashi as Hokage, Sasuke’s journeys–he didn’t want to write any of that.

Instead he wrote a story about Sarada being mindfucked (and if you don’t think Gaiden isn’t one long mindfuck of Sarada, I don’t know what to say), and he wrote a story about Mitsuki getting mindfucked. That was his idea of what a good story requires, apparently. Pubescents being lied to about who they are and parents who put lots of other things above their children.

So why get invested? If Oro is the one who kills Hinata so that Boruto can have her eye, will pro-ending people still be laughing at his kooky antics? How am I supposed to care about the inevitable further evil deeds that Oro is going to get up to when the heroes didn’t stop it when they could? When it’s Zoruto, grandson of Boruto, it’s still gonna be mindfucks all the way down.

This isn’t the kind of story I want to read, with a truly gross child-abusing villain, who isn’t treated like a villain, in a society built on child abuse (child soldiers and lying to children), where nothing ever fundamentally changes, and everyone pretends that the only problems are external (aliens). That’s just depressing. Compared to that, Madara was goddamn wholesome.

#anti-orochimaru #anti-naruto ending #don't hold back #tell us how you really feel #anti-kishimoto #tw: child abuse #tw: medical abuse #tw: torture #naruto #naruto analysis #tw: brainwashing #tw: gaslighting

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