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tastyliltina · 3 years

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SnackInc 1/?

A/n: This has been sitting in my drafts for a while and I've been meaning to post it...kind of a worldbuilding thing I made back when Fern was still a newer character of mine. Not really sure if I'll continue it or not, but the basic premise is that Fern works at a corporation that commissions humans out to be used as snacks for more feral giants/predatory creatures. This keeps random attacks on humans down and helps settle cravings the giants might have. Fern's a pretty well known snack but fell on hard times and had to resort to more shady deals outside of the corporation. So...yeah, have a worldbuilding thing ;;w;; If you enjoyed and want a story for yourself, feel free to inquire about commissions!: tinascommissions.carrd.co/ All stories are on sale 50% off until Dec. 10th! Now, onto the story! ~~ Fern stumbled through the street, clutching his wad of cash. Thick, warm liquid slimed his clothes as he moved away from his client. The giant looming behind him chuckled, and Fern turned to face the beast.

“Look, man…” Fern sighed, trying to brush back his hair. “Keep this quiet, alright? Don’t want it getting around I’m offering this...service to random giants on the street.” He thumbed through the payment, ensuring the bills were all there. Once he was sure, he glanced back up to the grinning giant.

Pearly peaks of white shimmered in the moonlight. Something about fangs in the dark was much more terrifying. Still, Fern held his ground.

“Heh. Whatever you say, morsel~.” A tongue traced over smiling lips, and Fern rolled his eyes.

“If that’s your best compliment, I’d hate to see an insult,” he muttered. The giant scoffed, but straightened. Deals like this weren’t appreciated among watchful eyes. Departures needed to be discreet.

Fern sighed. He watched his client stalk away, and tried to grasp what little pride he had left. The fact the ground shook with every step the giant took did little to help. Being treated like food for a quick cash grab...how humiliating. Still...money was nice. And with more wealthy clientele, maybe working in the food industry wasn’t so bad. Turning, Fern descended into the dim alley. He shivered as the drool clinging to him reacted with the wind…. Getting home would be hell.

Slowly, he traversed the desolate streets. Runoff from a recent storm splashed beneath his feet, though hardly drew Fern from his thoughts. With the money he’d gotten from tonight, he’d almost be able to pay off rent. If he did that, maybe he could find some more high-end clients. Spending night after night in another mouth, in another reckless giant was getting old. Most of the bastards didn’t use mints... Others liked to bite. At least through SnackInc, he got the clinets that cared about their treats a little more...he missed the days of pampering.

But damn, having extra cash felt so, so good. Fancier outfits and attending clubs where the high-end clients frequencted wasn't cheap. The reassurance dinners would be easy was well worth a few showers, he supposed. As long as rates didn’t spike, maybe there’d be enough for something hardy. A soup, or...maybe just burgers. Either sounded fine, as long as it wasn't a steaming bowl of ramen.

Soon enough, Fern found his apartment. The building was silent as Fern ascended the stairs. He supposed that made sense at this time of night. Just as he slid his hand into his pocket, Fern heard a rustling behind him. He stiffened. Giants and humans alike knew not to visit the others' living quarters, especially this late at night. It wasn’t worth the jail time or the fees. Some, though…

“Easy, pal.”

The voice was calm. Casual. Fern blinked. He turned, and was met with a pair of golden eyes. The rings of yellow peered down at him, squinting in the dark. Fern didn’t miss the reptilian features on the creature before him, and felt part of his blood run cold. Reptiles were the worst for rando attacks.

“What.” Fern snipped. His tone wasn’t aggressive enough. Fern didn’t care. He didn’t want to be yelling at a giant he didn’t know, especially one that knew where he lived.

“Said easy, man,” the giant continued. He was small, green-skinned and husky. Scales patched across his face, and a black sweater draped the giant’s torso. Unlike Fern, he appeared calm and collected. “Not gonna try anything. Just wanted to know where the nearest gas station was.”

Fern raised a brow. Oh. Though he didn't know if he trusted that answer or not, Fern could take it. He lifted a hand, pointing south. “‘Bout five miles that way. You can’t miss it.” The giant followed his gesture, squinting again. Then, he nodded.

“Cool, thanks.” Instead of leaving, or moving at all, the giant remained seated. Fern furrowed his brow.

“Well...okay. I’m-I’ll be going,” he mumbled. The giant nodded, not seeming intent on leaving. Fern felt something twist his stomach as he stepped into his place. That had been...unnerving, almost as much as approaching random giants to get them to eat him.

Slowly, Fern stepped into his living room. He flicked on the light, and was greeted with the familiar sight of...mediocrity. Beige walls, a beige couch, dirty carpet. Even the flickering light emulated half-assed effort. But, this was home. For now. Fern stretched, sighed, and made sure to lock his door behind him.

He sauntered down the hall, the thought of a shower making everything a little less horrid. Clean clothes, a clean bed… Even with the uncleanable stains of previous occupants on the mattress, sleep sounded so wonderful right now. Fern stepped into his bathroom. He stripped, tossed his clothes aside, and turned on the shower. God, hot water felt good.

Several minutes and layers of body scrub later, Fern scooped his soiled laundry up. His nose wrinkled at the stench of unmasked slobber. He tossed the clothes in the washer, ran a hand through his hair, and returned down the hall. The bed creaked as he collapsed into it, the scent of occupants past filling the air. Fern didn’t care. By the time the smells registered, he was already asleep.

Fern woke up to the sound of his alarm. He groaned. Another day, another customer to please. Sitting up, he snatched the offending device from his nightstand. Who was on the calendar today…

Wait. Fern’s eyes scanned over his clientele list. There was a new face among the regulars... Green skin, yellow eyes, red Mohawk...damn. It was the giant from the other night. Fern grimaced, setting his phone down and rubbing at his face with a sigh, taking a moment to collect himself.

Normally, the ones that approached Fern outside of business were scouting for fresh meat after some kind of falling out. They were the ones that made this job hard. Fern stood, looking over his calendar. For today, at least, there weren’t any taken slots. He had that much. Maybe he could do some cleaning? Cleaning sounded great.

He stood. No point planning the day without getting it started, he supposed. Fern stretched, sighed, and ambled down the hallway. He scouted the kitchen for food, and settled on some bacon and eggs. There was always a sense of pride that came with making his own food. Fern stepped up to his stove, twisting the stove knobs.

Soon enough, a steaming pile of eggs and bacon littered a paper plate. Fern grabbed some silverware, once again checking his schedule for today. Nothing new. He rubbed his chin, opening the file of his newest client. As expected, there wasn’t much available. Most clients went by a first name basis, and the majority didn’t include any other information but a phone number and place to reach them. Fern wasn’t sure how the new guy found out about what he offered, but decided to shrug it off.

Breakfast was quick. Fern took his time cleaning his plates, wishing he didn’t have to go out to the store today. But, one couldn’t get by without dish soap and food. Fern was too much of a neat freak to live a day without one, and food wasn’t a necessity when some clients bought him dinner before having him for dessert. He trudged down to his bedroom, throwing on a simple sweatshirt and jeans.

Fern slid out of his apartment, slipping his hands into his pockets. The jingle of keys signified him locking his door before he peeled away from the familiarity of home. Human-sized creatures traversed the narrow sidewalks, hustling and bustling to and fro. Fern didn’t miss the stares of those passing him. Word got around. Some people looked to him with admiration, being able to take on such an important, and yet demeaning task. Others scowled at him, and some took things to a physical level. Fern ignored those that bumped into him without saying anything, reserving his battles for those that had the guts to say something and make a scene.

Walking to the market never took too long, one of the perks of living in a small town. The building smelled like cinnamon, a warming reminder of the chilly air outside. Fern slid in with a small crowd. He headed for the cleaning section first, rubbing his hands together as he searched the shelves for his usual dish soap.

“Hey.”

The voice snapped Fern to attention. He blinked, turned, and smiled at the familiar face behind him. Kenny stood with her hands in her pockets, oversized sweatshirt complimenting her ripped up jeans. Fern relaxed. It was nice seeing a familiar face, even if it was of a cranky and potentially crazy bitch.

“Hey, Ken.” Fern nodded. He took pride in the ability to shorten her nickname without getting shanked. Kenny stepped up next to him, sliding her hands to her hips. Unlike Fern, Kenny had a more vanilla career. She was a well-renowned tattoo artist. Fern’d debated going to her for a few years, but didn’t know if their history justified her making a few creative decisions while he was under her needle.

“What brings you to market? Finally decide to crawl out of your slimy cave?” Kenny’s voice lowered. While she wasn’t a friend per se, Kenny was one of the few people Fern opened up to about his career choice. She’d never given him a hard time about it. If anything, she almost seemed in awe...or disgust, it was really hard to tell as far as Kenny was concerned.

“Ran out of soap,” Fern shrugged. “Can’t go without it,” he paused to pluck a bottle from the shelf. “Got a new client today. Some giant approached me after a rough one last night… Had to scrub myself for hours, the guy had way too many drinks before he gave me a call. Starting to think he ate me on a dare, y’know?” “Shit man,” Kenny shook her head, somehow without disturbing her loose bun. “I still don’t get how you deal with those assholes day in and out. Doesn’t it get...I dunno, gross after a while?”

“It does get gross, but really...someone’s gotta do it. If not me with all the magical guards in place, then it’d be someone else, or no one at all. And we know how big folk can get if they don’t get their...fix.” Fern tried to hide the bitterness in his tone, but he could still feel it in his voice. Anyone who didn’t live under a rock knew how bad things got before the Snack business stepped in. Disappearances, random attacks on towns… Even if it wasn’t a well-liked profession, it was an important one in order to keep the peace among different species. “But, there’s perks,” a crooked smile plastered Fern’s face. “Don’t gotta worry about a giant trying to mess me up, y’know? I’m...valuable.”

Kenny scoffed, “Valuable my ass,” she shook her head and sighed. “But yeah, you gotta point. Still...”

“Don’t you go worrying about me,” Fern laughed. “You’ve got a badass persona to keep, y’know?” He yelped as Kenny’s hand whacked the back of his head, but snickered at the fuming woman. She crossed her arms and sneered at him.

“Oh, shove it up yours.”

“Sorry, only know how to go down, I’m not into that-” “Fern I swear to God if I didn’t like you I’d shove my foot so far-...you know what, fuck it.” Kenny grabbed the back of Fern’s sweater, and the next thing he knew, he was flat on his back. A dull ache spread along his back and head, and he groaned.

“Nice...seeing you, Ken…” Fern mumbled as he pushed himself up. As usual, Kenny’d vanished into the crowd. Fern expected as much. Kenny never liked being forced to admit she had other emotions besides anger and rage...Fern liked to tease it out of her when he could, even if the result was almost always the same. Rubbing his head, Fern grabbed the soap from the shelf and headed towards checkout with a chuckle.

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thesoggychef-blog · 6 years

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Our Favorite Culinary Gifts Under $100

New Post has been published on https://simpleeasycooking.com/our-favorite-culinary-gifts-under-100/

Our Favorite Culinary Gifts Under $100

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Do you have a lifelong pact with a friend or a family member to stay within a certain price range when buying gifts? Did you maybe forget someone’s birthday this year and promise to make it up to them around the holidays? Do you have a buddy who’s had a difficult couple months or year (2017, amirite?)? Is there a person out there who did you a huge favor and you’re still trying to figure out how to thank them?

Well, cash never hurts. Just send them some cash. Paper money, yes: cash.

But if you’d rather buy them a nice gift, one just pricey enough to make a palpable dent in your finances without breaking the bank, then we’ve got several recommendations for nice cooking gear that cost less than $100. (For items a little gentler on the wallet, check out our collection of presents under $50.) But if you’re ready to spend a little more, upping the ante gives you some great options.

A Powerful Multi-Cooker

Everyone loves the Instant Pot! Haven’t you heard? It’s the “it” cooking tool of the year, and with good reason: The Instant Pot is a very efficient multi-cooker at a very nice price point. In our review of multi-cookers and pressure cookers. It’s the perfect gift for someone looking to get into pressure cooking, or really anybody hoping to save space on appliances—think slow-cooker, steamer, pressure-cooker, hot pot, and rice-cooker all rolled into one.

Our Winning Immersion Blender

[Photograph: Emily Dryden]

We just recently reviewed all the immersion blenders out there and our top pick will run you just a hair under $100. This blender is a great gift for pretty much anyone in your life—it’s useful for tasks ranging from making soups to zipping up two-minute mayo to creating silky-smooth sauces. Even if the recipient already has an immersion blender, if it isn’t this one, they’ll be getting a serious upgrade.

One Impressive Boning Knife

This stainless steel boning knife is one of my new recommendations for this year’s gift guide: I own it, I love it, I can’t stop talking about it to anyone who will listen, and—hurray!—you are my captive audience. This is a great gift for the budding knife geek in your life, but it’s also particularly good for anyone who butchers chicken regularly (and more people should: it’s easy and fun and very economical). For the knife nerd, this blade is a great introduction to the wide world of specialty Japanese blades, since it’s modeled on the honesuki, or poultry knife.

If that intimidates you, know that there are a couple key differences that make it more appropriate for a novice. It’s relatively easier to sharpen, and it isn’t just a single-use knife; it can be used as a petty knife in a pinch, and because of the way the blade is shaped, can even be used to chop stuff up using a rocking motion.

But where it shines is in cutting up poultry. If you have a cook friend who’s talked about experimenting with yakitori, butterflying chicken wings, or making a ballontine (or turducken!), this is the knife for her. If you’ve got a buddy who complains about the high price of deboned quail and squab, bring him this blade. The thin, sharp tip is ideal for maneuvering around wee little bird bones. In contrast to a traditional Western boning knife, I’ve found that it’s easier to use this blade to cut around the bones rather than to scrape them, although the wide, sturdy base excels at scraping, too, so it’s also good for Frenching chops, or when you really have to get some chicken legs deboned in a couple of minutes for some fajitas.

And the best part? Its price. Specialty Japanese knives can get very pricey very quickly, and given the materials of its construction, the price at Chefs Knives to Go is a steal.

The Fastest, Most Accurate Instant-Read Thermometer

[Photograph: J. Kenji López-Alt]

Hi. Yes, we are recommending the Thermapen as a gift, again. Why? Well, it is simply the best instant-read thermometer on the market. An accurate instant-read thermometer will make your cooking more reliable and eliminate the guesswork from any recipe—it’s a crucial tool for beginner, intermediate, and serious cooks.

“Why are you recommending it as a gift, though?” I hear you asking. Well, some people do not have it (like me; I don’t have it. Hint, hint!) Why do I need it? Well, I don’t, but if someone were to gift it to me I’d be mighty pleased (in fact, I purposely never bought one because I thought for a long time my lovely family members would gift me a Thermapen! A good gift, please!). It’ll give you an accurate temperature reading in two seconds. And it’s got a huge range—-58 to 572°F (-50 to 300°C)—which means you can use it for perfectly cooked meat, making candy, deep-frying, whatever (deep-freezing?!?).

It is a guaranteed home-run present—even for those cooks who insist they cook by the sound of the sizzle or by the bubble of the boil. One day they’ll realize the grievous error of their mumbo-jumbo ways and thank you.

A Quality Sharpening Stone

Let’s face it: Most people who cook a lot are cooking with less-than-sharp knives. This is mostly because knife-sharpening is seen as some abstruse skill, something only butchers and chefs and hunters and barbers have any use for. But a knife—any knife!—is like a brain: dull = dangerous; sharp = safe (and very sexy). This present may cross the line from gift-giving to obligation-giving, since the recipient probably hasn’t ever had a sharpening stone before, but if you’ve got a budding knife nerd in your life, or if you know someone who has complained about their very expensive nice knives becoming uselessly dull, then it’s perfect. With just a little bit of practice, they’ll be sharpening their blades on the regular, and they may even thank you by offering to sharpen your collection of blunt blades.

This sharpening stone is a basic Japanese combination water stone, with one side that has a medium grit (1,000) and the other has a fine grit (6,000). The medium grit side is coarser and takes off more metal, and will do the bulk of sharpening, while the fine grit side is more for polishing and fine-tuning the sharpening job. While it is true that combination stones are inferior to stones of a single grit, the combination stone is a great way for someone just starting out with sharpening to familiarize themselves with how to use and care for water stones.

You will want a “fixer” to give along with the stone, which will ensure that the stone’s surface remains flat, but even with the fixer added on, the total price of your (very thoughtful, amazing, excellent) gift will be below $100.

(FYI: If your budget is really limited—I’ve been there—but you still want to give an avid cook a nice gift, offer to take their knives in for sharpening somewhere. If you don’t know of a place, ask your butcher or look around online. It should cost you ~$5 per knife and the recipient will truly appreciate it).

A Professional-Grade Apron That’s Easy on the Eyes

Personally, I’ve never had any use for an apron, because I don’t have any nice clothes. But if I did have shirts and slacks and stuff of a decent enough quality that I wouldn’t want it to get ruined while futzing around in the kitchen, I’d want an apron. But there are aprons and then there are aprons. Most aprons come with some kistchy decal or slogan, and that’s all well and good, but if you’re looking for a high-quality gift right smack in the middle of the $50-$100 range, then the aprons from Tilit are a wonderful option. They’re made for professionals, so their waxed cotton can handle most any spill of grease or splash of sauce, but they’re really, really, ridiculously, ridiculously good-looking—enough so that the recipient could proudly wear one as they welcome guests into their home.

But Wait, There’s More!

We’re not done. You can find plenty more gift ideas right this way »

Your purchase on Amazon helps support Serious Eats.

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#Culinary #Favorite #Gifts

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financevisionary · 7 years

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The Best Sources for Affordable Healthy Food

Well hello there, Mint household. Welcome to the first installment of this incredibly interesting collaboration between Mint and also Root + Revel!

Before we study today's post, how about a little fulfill and also welcome? Hi! I'm Kate Kordsmeier, the owner of Origin + Revel, a food and health blog aiding individuals strike the equilibrium in between excellent and good for you.

I'm a permanent food author for publications, a recipe designer, and blog owner. I'm likewise living proof that food is medicine (check out my tale to find out even more!). My major message is: Food Heals! That doesn't need to suggest bland poultry and fit to be tied broccoli. Preference is paramount as well as we take it back to fundamentals, instilling charm, taste and event right into everyday life, helping you live naturally, without sacrifice.

That being stated, I'm the first to admit that healthy, health food is expensive. Plain and simple. Even if you support natural farming as well as pasture-raised/grass-fed/wild-caught growing approaches, they just cost even more loan compared to their standard counterparts.

But that doesn't suggest you need to pay out heaps of cash money every single time you begged Whole Foods. Why I've teamed up with Mint to splash all my budget-friendly, healthy eating secrets.

The Cost of Eating Healthy

Here's the point: whether you pay a bit a lot more upfront to nurture your body with healthy and balanced food, or you save loan by filling your stubborn belly with factory-farmed meat, pesticide-laden GMO fruit and vegetables and refined junk filled with fabricated shades, preservatives and various other hazardous chemicals, it's possible you're going to pay for it one way or an additional. And also I prefer to not do it later in the form of clinical expenses. Let's pay our farmer prior to our doctor.

Let's think large picture, long-term, full story, due to the fact that eating unhealthy food will certainly cost you much, a lot more in the long run. And, as it ends up, eating healthy and balanced, organic food actually does not have to be insane pricey. It IS possible to eat healthy on a budget.

To wit, here are the very best sources for budget friendly, healthy food:

Buy Straight From Your Local Farmer

There are many savings to be carried healthy and balanced food when you go right to the source. Consider it-- not just are you cutting out the intermediary, however the food isn't being delivered in from throughout the nation (read: no transport sets you back added right into the price). Cheaper AND much more nutrient-dense and tasty, as the food is fresher, too.

And if that weren't enough, when you acquire straight, you can ask the farmer concerns concerning their expanding practices (Are they natural? Are their animals turf fed and free variety? Do they utilize sustainable techniques to maintain the setting?), guaranteeing you obtain exactly what you want and also you understand precisely where your food came from.

Not certain where to locate farms near you? Just head to your regional farmer's market, or discover one near you through LocalHarvest.org or the USDA. Similarly, you can sign up with a CSA (Community Supported Farming), which delivers boxes of fresh, locally-grown fruit and vegetables from small, family ranches ideal to your doorstep. Sometimes wellness insurance policy companies will even repay the cost CSA memberships.

A few insider tips: When you create an individual relationship with farmers, you could typically negotiate prices with them. You can get in bulk (i.e. buy a quarter of a cow as well as ice up the meat until you're all set to use it) to save also much more. You could additionally save at the farmer's market later on in the day when costs obtain lowered to get rid of whatever prior to the farmers go home.

Shop Online for Healthy Food

There are loads of healthy e-tailers providing actual food online-- also better, you can shop from your PJ's on the couch.

One of my individual favorites for non-perishable food is Thrive Market-- a Costco-meets-Amazon-meets-Whole Foods resource selling healthy and balanced, non-toxic foods and items at wholesale costs. Virtually whatever they sell is the lowest rate I have actually seen, and they're constantly offering customers totally free presents of full-size products as well as large coupon codes to save a lot more money.

Another money-saving fave is Amazon.com Subscribe and also Save, where I stock up on healthy and balanced favorites like organic coconut milk, cacao powder, flax seeds, chia seeds, spices and also protein bars. Amazon.com Fresh also provides some great bargains, and they supply within 2 hours right to your house!

There are likewise great deals of extraordinary business delivering icy natural, lasting and also grass-fed meat as well as wild-caught fish and shellfish right to your front door. A few of my faves consist of Butcher Box, U.S. Health Meats and Important Selection Seafood. These services frequently have sales, discount rate codes and usually budget-friendly costs on premium food.

A few insider tips: Do not forget when you shop on-line you can use cash back sites and frequent flier purchasing websites to supercharge your financial savings. Some of my favorites consist of Retailmenot.com, Ebates.com, Joinhoney.com, EVReward.com, ChaseUltimateRewards.com and Dealspotr.com.

Use a Meal Package Shipment Service

One of the biggest expenditures any type of home cook has is certainly waste. Most of us have the very best of intents when we stockpile at the grocery store, however we usually finish up discarding something due to the fact that it went negative before we might utilize it, or we purchased excessive, or we were too worn out to cook that night. This isn't really just inefficient, it's expensive-- think of just how much money you might've conserved if you in fact used every little thing you bought!

Fortunately, there is a remedy to this problem: meal set distribution services. These companies send you precisely just what you need, so you're not purchasing obscure or unusual components you'll just utilize as soon as, or perhaps simply much more food compared to you'll need as a whole. The components are also all pre-measured, so along with much less waste, you'll likewise have an easier cleanup.

The finest healthier meal kit shipment solution I've attempted is Sunlight Basket, which provides natural, gourmet, fresh recipe boxes, including Vegan, Gluten-Free and Paleo meals, in green, recyclable packaging.

For more suggestions on exactly how to conserve cash and also eat healthy, see Origin + Revel.

Coming up

In my following write-up, I am going to chat concerning how DIY'ing your personal charm and also cleaning items could conserve you heaps of cash money, lower the contaminants in your residence and body As Well As save the environment (psst: did I state it's also very easy and also fun?!).

Be certain to adhere to along on Mint as well as follow me on Instagram @rootandrevel, so you don't miss out on a solitary healthy living tip.

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thesoggychef-blog · 6 years

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Our Favorite Culinary Gifts Under $100

New Post has been published on https://simpleeasycooking.com/our-favorite-culinary-gifts-under-100/

Our Favorite Culinary Gifts Under $100

Well, cash never hurts. Just send them some cash. Paper money, yes: cash.

A Powerful Multi-Cooker

Our Winning Immersion Blender

[Photograph: Emily Dryden]

One Impressive Boning Knife

And the best part? Its price. Specialty Japanese knives can get very pricey very quickly, and given the materials of its construction, the price at Chefs Knives to Go is a steal.

The Fastest, Most Accurate Instant-Read Thermometer

[Photograph: J. Kenji López-Alt]

A Quality Sharpening Stone

A Professional-Grade Apron That’s Easy on the Eyes

But Wait, There’s More!

We’re not done. You can find plenty more gift ideas right this way »

Your purchase on Amazon helps support Serious Eats.

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#Culinary #Favorite #Gifts

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