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kpopastrologys · 2 years

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💘✨✨💝💕💖 Venus aspects 💘✨✨💘

◾ Venus conjunct Ascendant

You have a charm and an appeal about you that others cannot resist. You draw people to you like a magnet and you have the uncanny knack of attracting anything and everything you need. You know how to tell people exactly what they want to hear, which is not always good. At times it is difficult for you to say no because you do not want to hurt anyone. Yet you do not see that many times you use people and think quite nothing of it. Remember that one day you will reap what you sow.

◾ Venus conjunct Jupiter

You are a generous, warm-hearted and open-handed person who shares every resource with others. You give of both yourself and your possessions to those whom you favor. You do not want to be limited in any way, either with your affections or with your personal possessions. You enjoy luxury and refinement and you desire to always be in comfortable, elegant surroundings. You hate having to get your hands dirty. You are charming, gracious and charitable and you are the model host or hostess. This aspect brings material good fortune, which has been earned from previous lives. If there is a negative here, then it is your tendency towards self-indulgence, over-extravagance and laziness. Sometimes things come to you so easily that you do not appreciate them. Things are most appreciated if one has to work hard for them. There may be a love of rich, sweet food as well as too much of it, hence a tendency to gain weight. You are a very gentle and social person who loves harmony, beauty and travel. There may be vulnerability through emotional, ethical or moral naivete.

◾ Venus conjunct Mars

You are extremely amorous and romantic and there are times when you find it difficult to control your passions. You seem to be a magnet to the opposite sex, regardless of whether most people would classify you as beautiful or attractive, although you may well be. You are simply fun and pleasant to be around and that is why you attract so much attention. When you are interested in someone, you tend to pursue them with all the fire within you. Of course, sometimes you come on just a little too strongly and that can cause difficulties. You have a strong desire for love and beauty and involving yourself in some type of creative activity, whether it be art, music, sculpture or poetry, would help to satisfy this inner craving. The more you channel your creativity into means such as these, the less problems you will have controlling your hormones.

This aspect brings a certain charisma and you seem to naturally draw people around you. You like to socialize and are perhaps happiest when surrounded by others. In fact, it may be hard for you to be alone in your own company. You have a great need to give and receive affection from others. Just be careful of where you place your affections. Not everyone feels the same as you do. It is sometimes difficult for you to take any relationship lightly, hence the need to be discriminating with where your heart is placed. This can be a difficult aspect at times because it tends to produce love-hate relationships with those you care about. There are hostile and affectionate feelings both at the same time towards the same person. Channel your energies into creative endeavors.

◾ Venus conjunct Neptune

You tend to be what some people call the hopeless romantic. You are very idealistic about love and romance and many times it isn't so much the case that you love someone or that you are in love with someone as it is that you are in love with love. You tend to put your loved one on a pedestal and this can bring problems because when the loved one eventually does something to "fall from grace", then huge disappointment and disillusionment set in and you are crushed. You need to stop looking at the world through rose-colored glasses and see things for how and what they really are.

There is danger of falling into the wrong type of relationship, a relationship of co-dependence. Either you or your partner may enjoy or feel obligated to play the role of martyr, victim or savior. Remember that no good relationship is unequal. Two equal partners who neither feel the need to save or be saved make the best couple.

◾ Venus conjunct Pluto

You have deep, compelling and sometimes irrational feelings of love and passion and you will not settle for a relationship that isn't intense. You are wildly passionate towards the ones you love, as well as being perhaps jealous and possessive of them as well. Whatever you feel, you want to feel it down to the deepest level of your existence. Of course this can cause problems with everyday life because no relationship can be that intense and that interesting all the time. At times you do not care whether the emotions you feel are good or bad as long as they are powerful. So agony and ecstasy are both okay with you, although you're not silly enough to prefer the agony. Well, maybe. These intense relationships, even if they do not last, have a way of transforming you and that is why you instinctively seek them out or why they seem to come to you.

You tend to have a certain emotional fanaticism about the things you care about. It's all or nothing — there are no half-way measures for you. There can be trouble through emotional excesses, misplaced passions or the loss of control of the sensual nature. Self-control and self-discipline are necessary or you may self-destruct. Channel your hormonal energies into things creative, such as art, music, poetry, sculpture, drama, etc. You must not allow yourself to become too self-indulgent or hedonistic. Feelings of jealousy, envy and possessiveness must be controlled or any relationship will be eventually destroyed. You need to develop your self-confidence so that feelings of insecurity do not drive you over the edge. All these experiences all meant to force you to reconsider and transform your values.

◾ Venus conjunct Saturn

Intimacy with another does not come easy for you. You have been hurt in the past and you are reluctant to open up to others because you fear being hurt again. It is painful to relive bad experiences and you have sort of resolved within yourself that if you do not get involved, then you won't get hurt. As Simon and Garfunkle once said, "I am a rock, I am an island". As a result of your experiences, people may think you are cold, aloof, unfeeling and uncaring. The challenge here is for you to learn to open up and warm up to people, regardless of the possible consequences. You need to remember that you cannot find true love if you are unwilling to first give love, regardless of the results. Love is not barter and you cannot expect everyone you love to love you back. That is not how it works. This aspect is trying to teach you that love is universal, all-encompassing and should be doled out with no strings attached.

You find it difficult to trust people because of past painful experiences, so it takes time for you to take down all your barriers and defenses. You perhaps feel that you are unworthy of love and you cannot think of many reasons why someone should be able to love you. But, that type of thinking is an illusion. You are entitled to as much love as the next person, but love does carry responsibilities. You are worthy of love and there is a lot to love about you, but you must change your attitudes before you can experience the truth of what I have said. People do care about you, but they will tend to leave you alone if they feel that you are trying to shut them out. Open up your emotions and take your chances. It won't kill you, unless you let it. And that would then be your fault.

So, here it is. You need to learn to value and love yourself more and to express your appreciation for others more openly. Not with material gifts, but with honest and true emotion. You have a complex emotional nature and it needs to be examined. You are very loyal and steadfast towards those you love once your emotional needs are understood and that is an admirable trait. You tend to be very serious and responsible in relationships. You may involve yourself with noticeably older or younger partners. Try to be less sensitive and more forgiving when you think a loved one has slighted you. You have a need to feel secure and if you do not, then that tends to throw you for a loop. All manner of negative emotions surface then.

You find it difficult to show love physically. Stop being such a miser with your affections as well as with your possessions. You have a stingy streak in you that does not serve you well. After all, you can't take it with you when you go. So use some of it now in order to spread a little happiness. You may have a tendency to equate having things to having security. This is another illusion. You don't really become less secure by giving away possessions. In fact, the only true wealth you have and retain is that which you give away to others. This is another lesson for you to learn. To end on the bright side, you are a reliable friend who can be trusted.

◾Venus conjunct Uranus

You are excitable, spontaneous, and easily aroused emotionally and sexually. You tend to fall in and out of love very quickly and have little self-restraint or concern for propriety when your feelings have been stirred. You are unique, a bit eccentric and unconventional and you don't mind experimenting. You love and crave excitement, especially in your emotional life. You enjoy the thrill of the chase and you split when things start to get boring. Your strong suit is not in hanging around for the long haul. You prefer non-traditional relationships, ones that give you plenty of freedom and independence as you do not like to feel tied down. You like playing the field and settling down in a permanent, one-to-one relationship may be asking too much from you. In fact, you may intentionally choose partners who are otherwise unavailable because it helps keep things from getting too close and involved. You don't like strings attached to relationships and you prefer to remain rather detached with it all.

You have a highly unusual and explosive emotional nature. You change emotionally as easily as the wind changes direction. You are troubled with the emotional ups and downs which you do not understand and you have the tendency to blame whoever is handy for your emotional lows. The crazy emotional tides which you feel are coming from within and they are because your creativity cannot find a decent outward expression. Use your wonderful creativity ability and your fine intuition in the pursuit of something artistically or musically creative. Then you won't be quite so at the mercy of your erratic emotions.

You have a lot of personal magnetism and sex appeal. Others find you very alluring, exciting and interesting. Being restless by nature, travel would be good for you as it would give you an opportunity to satisfy your curiosity and your wanderlust. Change is necessary for you and one way or another your life will be filled with it. In general, you do not care what people think of you or the ways in which you relate to the world and to others. You will do what you want. You need to exercise self-control over your sensual nature.

◾ Venus sextile Ascendant; Venus Trine Ascendant

You are cheerful, fun-loving, charming, easy-going and have a pleasant personality. You love beauty and harmony and you are happiest when things are going smoothly. You do not like discord and you do not go out of your way to make waves. You may have artistic talent.

◾ Venus sextile Jupiter; Venus trine Jupiter

You are a generous, warm-hearted and open-handed person who shares every resource with others. You give of both yourself and your possessions to those whom you favor, although you will rarely put yourself out too much in order to do so. You enjoy luxury and refinement and you desire to always be in comfortable, elegant surroundings. You hate having to get your hands dirty. You are charming, gracious and charitable and you are the model host or hostess. This aspect brings material good fortune, which has been earned from previous lives. If there is a negative here, then it is your tendency towards self-indulgence, over-extravagance and laziness. Sometimes things come to you so easily that you do not appreciate them. Things are most appreciated if one has to work hard for them. There may be a love of rich, sweet food as well as too much of it, hence a tendency to gain weight. You are a very gentle and social person who loves harmony, beauty and travel. Be careful not to take things too much for granted or take the easy way out.

◾ Venus trine Mars; Venus sextile Mars

You are warmly romantic and openly express your affection, appreciation and love of the opposite sex, though rarely in a crude or insensitive manner. You seem to be a magnet to the opposite sex, regardless of whether most people would classify you as beautiful or attractive, although you may well be. You are simply fun and pleasant to be around and that is why you attract so much attention. You have sex appeal and others like and appreciate your easy-going emotional nature. You like getting people together and if it were up to you, you would have the whole world paired off, living happily ever after.

You have a strong desire for love and beauty and involving yourself in some type of creative activity, whether it be art, music, sculpture or poetry, would help to satisfy this inner craving. This aspect brings a certain charisma and you seem to naturally draw people around you. You like to socialize and are happiest when surrounded by others. You have a great need to give and receive affection from others. You are warm and demonstrative in your affection for others. You are very much alive and others find this very appealing. Fulfillment and harmony in love is likely for you because you know what you want and need in a romantic sense and you express those desires honestly and openly. You have no hidden agendas. You are a non-combative individual who likes peace and serenity. You put a lot of energy into your emotions.

◾ Venus sextile Neptune; Venus trine Neptune

You are a sensitive person with a lot of artistic imagination and a flair for creating beautiful things or environments. You find peace in listening to good music and many times it will be the catalyst for your trips of fantasy. You are romantic and would like to have a story-book kind of life where you live in bliss with your one and only soulmate. These are indeed high ideals, but it's okay for you to dream because at the same time you are dreaming, you are able to keep your feet on the ground and not get carried away by it all. You are compassionate and seek to help others who are in need. You are a natural "giver" and it makes you happy to serve. You want what's best for all concerned and you do not have a problem with your ego getting in the way. You find it difficult to be too assertive as you like peace and harmony, without making waves. You are capable of great sacrifice for those you love and you do not necessarily need to be recognized for that or receive anything in return. You have a mystical side to you and you like being around artistic or mystical people. Church music stirs your soul and is as a breath of fresh air from your true home, the heaven worlds. You may have real talent with music or singing. You are devoted and devotional. You generally root for the underdog and can sometimes be a sucker for a sob story. You will attract people in this lifetime who will help you continue the soul growth you started in previous lives.

◾Venus sextile Pluto; Venus trine Pluto

You put everything you have into your emotions. Because you feel and love so deeply, so passionately and wholeheartedly, others may find your intensity either extremely attractive or very threatening. You are charismatic, with sex appeal and a certain amount of animal magnetism which can't help but be noticed by the opposite sex. You have the ability to use your attractiveness and charm to manipulate others, oftentimes without even realizing it. This aspect gives you the opportunity to transform your values or to be the catalyst to help others transform theirs. There is artistic ability along with a desire to create beauty, harmony and comfort. You have an understanding and an empathy for the problems of others and you are always looking for ways in which to help them or at least find the good that is in them.

◾Venus trine Saturn; Venus sextile Saturn

You are loyal and steadfast in matters of love and affection. The feelings of others are a serious matter to you and you don't play games with people's affections. Fidelity is highly valued and you don't want to settle for less. Security plays an important part in your life and you have a fine enough opinion about yourself and your own self-worth that problems with insecurity don't cause you much aggravation or upset. Still, you are somewhat reserved in showing your affections as you want to be sure you can trust whomever you are involved with. Your tastes and needs are simple and although you appreciate beauty and luxury, you do not need every luxury and convenience in the world in order to be happy. A person's character and inner nature matter more to you than their appearance. Casual or superficial relationships are not what you want and you aren't looking for them. You understand that the best kind of love takes time to develop and real love only gets better, deeper and more satisfying with age. The friendships you form are generally solid and long-lasting. Stability of emotions is one of your hallmarks. You have an innate sense of duty and responsibility towards your loved ones. Self-control is relatively easy for you to practice. You wouldn't be considered a party animal as your outlook on life is a little more serious and reserved than that. Still, others appreciate the fine qualities you have spent lifetimes developing. You have an inborn strength and courage to face life's difficulties.

◾ Venus sextile Uranus; Venus trine Uranus

You are very creative, intuitive, original, outspoken, and open in thought and emotion. You have a magnetic charm and sex appeal that attracts others to you. You enjoy surprises and anything that provides excitement to your life, including your relationships. You are independent and want a good deal of personal freedom in your involvements with others. Your ideas about love and romance are open and progressive and you are willing to try almost anything. You make and are drawn into unusual friendships with unusual sorts of people. Many people come and go into and out of your life and they are all there to test or challenge your values and your ability to change and to be flexible. They somehow fill unique needs within you. Same with friends — they come, but they go out of your life when they no longer fulfill a need. You have quite unusual ways of looking at things and you always seem to come up with clever solutions to the problems that are presented to you. Things happen to you quite suddenly, very much out of the blue. You cannot anticipate these events, you can only merely react to them. This is particularly true with love relationships. You will constantly receive exciting, unusual and unexpected events in your life which are of considerable assistance in your achieving both personal and soul growth.

◾ Venus opposite Ascendant; Venus square Ascendant

You seem to need the approval of others in order to feel good about yourself. You may lack self-assurance and self-confidence. You attract things you need with virtually no effort on your part. You like to be with warm, sociable people. You have a charming and pleasant personality but you may be insincere. There is also a tendency to take things for granted and to be somewhat lazy at times.

◾ Venus opposite Jupiter; Venus square Jupiter

There are many possibilities with this aspect. Perhaps you will try to have a relationship with one who has completely different interests than you. Perhaps your devotion to some pet cause is annoying to the one who is nearest and dearest to you. Or you may be financially wasteful or extravagant, or perhaps bombastic in your appearance. There are tendencies here for self-indulgence and over-extravagance and your love or cravings for rich, sweet food can cause you trouble with your health in the form of circulation and weight problems due to excess. Perhaps you do not value what you own because it has all come too easily. Maybe you never really had to work all that hard to accumulate it, since you seem to have the ability to effortlessly attract most everything you need. The challenge here is to balance your desires for material things with your desires for philosophic ideals. Your values will be called into question and you may need to rearrange your priorities. You have an expansive emotional nature and you have the tendency to become involved with that type of love that is commonly referred to as "blind" love. Perhaps your feelings of love are motivated by considerations of money, property or social status.

But in spite of all that is said above, you are basically a warm-hearted and generous person who will come to the aid of friends if they are in need. People know they can count on your emotional and material help without your judging them in the process. You tolerate and accept other people's shortcomings and this goes a long way in keeping harmony, which is something that is really important to you and necessary for your well-being. At times, though, you avoid confronting difficult issues because you don't want to make waves or upset people's feelings. At times you need to be more self-assertive, though, not only because it is right to stand up for your beliefs but also because your needs have to met in order for you to retain a healthy balance. You are a lover of social situations and you like to be surrounded by people. You know how to handle people and still be liked. Being alone with yourself makes you somewhat uncomfortable. You need to learn self-restraint.

◾ Venus opposite Mars; Venus square Mars

Amongst various possible tendencies are these: Your need to satisfy your own desires before considering other people's needs causes anger and frustration. You suppress your own desires in order to maintain peace, which causes internal conflict within you. Sex and love can cause problems because either you run hot and cold alternately, or you don't know the difference between the two or perhaps you simply have love-hate types of relationships. Your high sex drive can lead you to squander your creative force through sexual excess and sensuality. Perhaps you "fall" into love easily with whoever pays you the slightest bit of attention and affection.

You are intensely amorous and attractive to the opposite sex and are not inclined to simple, friendly platonic relationships. There is a lot of tension in your love life because you often put your own needs ahead of your partner's or you are impatient when it comes to having your own needs met. You tend to run hot and cold in your relationships. If your partner is hot to trot, then you are not, and when you are ready for action, then your partner is not in the mood. You probably find yourself releasing your "hate" through verbal or physical fights when there are differences of opinion with your partner and after your hostility is released, then you once again feel "love" for that person. Of course, while your emotions might be back to normal, you partner is still trying to figure out just what happened and what hit them. You are ready to go again, but they are not and you can't understand why. This can create a great deal of frustration and disappointment that you do not easily shrug off because you cannot understand what the other person's "problem" is. If you are not in a love relationship, then you want to be in one and if you are, then you don't want to be. Your emotions are not stable and you have problems dealing with them. You are indecisive and your values and standards of behavior change from one moment to the next. You need to learn how to compromise with others so that your anger does not erupt when you do not get your way. Blowing off steam is fine, and perhaps you need to buy yourself a punching bag so you can spar with it when you are upset, but it is not right to use other people, especially loved ones, as verbal punching bags or as objects of your assault tactics. Additionally, you need to overcome your feelings of love and hate toward the people you care about.

◾ Venus opposite Neptune; Venus square Neptune

Another facet of this aspect is that you may have such an ideal mate built up in your own imagination that no real person could ever come close to your fantasy. You may spend your entire lifetime looking for Mr. or Ms. Perfect such that you miss Mr. or Ms. Right. You become very disillusioned when you discover that no real, flesh-and-blood person ever quite lives up to your dream image of the perfect mate. Come down to earth and realize that no one is perfect and there are no white knights ready to come dashing along to save you. Stop the dreaming but don't give up the dream. Although you frequently fantasize about love and romance, you may avoid becoming intimately involved with anyone or making definite commitments. You can be evasive and dishonest with yourself and others when it comes to love.

You are a sensitive person who enjoys the finer, aesthetic things in life. You desire harmony and beauty and are probably attracted to the arts in some way, either painting, music, dance, theater or drama. You are perhaps attracted to those with artistic or mystical inclinations. There is a certain charm about you that others find unworldly. The unusual and the intuitive, the sensual and the explorative appeal to you. You are insecure in matters of love. Simply remember that you have human frailty, but do the best you can as that is all the Universe asks of you. Recognize, too, that human weakness exists even in those you love. Sometimes others cannot live up to your expectations, which may be quite unrealistic at times. You may be unrealistic in matters of love. You may believe that if someone loves you enough that they can read your mind. This will set you up for many disappointments because that is just not true. You need to tell people what you want and how you feel. They cannot read your mind no matter how much they love and care about you.

You need to transform your material values into spiritual values and to turn personal desires into universal desires. Personal property and possessions may disappear in strange, mysterious ways in order to teach you that material possessions are easily replaced and therefore are of limited value. The only thing you can take with you when you die are your spiritual and personal growth, your experiences. You need to learn to love without expecting love in return. You must learn to forgive and thus release inner resentments. You need to learn how to turn the other cheek while not becoming a doormat for all to walk on. One last thing, do not turn to drugs or alcohol when you feel sorrow or when you feel like escaping from the world. Life must be faced head-on if you are to get anywhere and resorting to drugs or alcohol will only make things much worse.

◾ Venus opposite Pluto; Venus square Pluto

You are drawn to powerful and compelling emotional and sexual attractions and experiences that you may feel you have little choice or control over. You crave intensity and these incidents provide you with the opportunity to satisfy your wanton desires. You feel an overwhelming need for love and you may be emotionally or sexually greedy, insatiable, obsessive or compulsive. You tend to be very jealous of and possessive of the objects of your desires and although you keep tight reins on your partners, you do not want them to question or control you in any way. This makes for very one-sided types of relationships. You need to become aware that your jealous and possessive traits will drive away those you profess to love. Power struggles are likely in your relationships as you want to wear the pants, yet you continually attract that same sort of person for a partner. Your love life is passionate and often explosive and painful, but you don't seem to mind because the intensity helps make you feel that you are alive.

The challenge here is to transform your values. Important psychological problems are being worked out because of and through your relationships with others. Because of this you may attract people and friends who act destructively towards you. The reason this happens is because these people are mirroring the same type of acts you yourself have done in former lives. You are now reaping what you have sown previously. You are being given the chance to wipe your slate clean if you do not respond to evil with evil. Release all thoughts of revenge and learn to turn the other cheek. When your debts are paid and your lessons are learned, then destructive people will no longer be part of your life. This aspect shows a readiness on your part to atone for past mistakes and cruelties.

In matters of health, this aspect tends to interfere with the magnetic forces in the veins and prevents proper drainage of toxins and waste material from the tissues. It can also hinder the filtering process in the kidneys. This leads to improper cleansing of the blood, with the result that toxins and waste material seek exit through the lungs and skin in the form of lung congestions and skin eruptions. The spiritual lesson here is to let go of ill feelings (emotional toxins) and forgive (elimination, transformation), rather than trying to get even or seeking revenge.

On the positive side, you do have the emotional power and unusual creativity to bring about beneficial and healing changes into the lives of others if you can focus on other's needs instead of your own.

◾ Venus opposite Saturn; Venus square Saturn

Your emotional development may have been delayed or it may simply be inadequate. You find it difficult to be warm and loving towards people because you have been hurt in the past and you fear it may happen again. You are stingy with material resources and with affection. You believe that everything must be earned and paid for — there are no free lunches. Because you find it difficult to express your feelings, you tend to show people how you feel by buying them gifts as a substitute for you and your feelings. If they reject your gift, then this is easier to take than if they reject you. Though you crave love and affection, intimacy is difficult for you. You have a shallow opinion of yourself and your own worth and talents. You do not understand why anyone could possibly love you. You feel that you are unlovable. This is something you need to strongly work on as your life will continue to be miserable if you do not learn to change your attitude. You are as worthy of love as anyone else, but you must come to realize that for yourself. Do not let past experiences govern your actions and feelings for the rest of your life.

You are a serious and reserved person who appears to others as cold, aloof, unfeeling and uncaring. You are not necessarily these things, it's just that you are very cautious in letting anyone see the real you or in letting people get close to you. You want to love and be loved, but you find this very difficult. You need to remember that you first have to give love to get love. And you can't buy real love. It doesn't work that way. You find it difficult to enjoy yourself in a light-hearted, open and playful way. You understand work, duty and responsibility a lot better than you understand feelings, affection and love. Rarely do you do anything for pleasure. If something involves work or getting something done, then that is pleasure for you. Other people do not understand that about you. There are times, though, when you procrastinate and put off attending to necessities with the result that duties tend to pile up. You need to learn how to balance the seriousness with life and the enjoyment of life.

You may become romantically involved with people who do not value you or treat you well. You need to learn to love and value yourself before you will find happiness in love. Security is very important to you, yet you do not know how to feel secure. Your fear of loss, of money, property, loved ones, etc., makes you very insecure. This negativity colors all your relationships for the worse. You must learn how to trust again. You must learn how to face your fears, even if it is painful. This is the only way you will ever overcome them.

You have the tendency to lose your faith and your optimism when life presents problems with which you must cope. It's fine to have a well-developed sense of responsibility, but you must also learn to trust in divine wisdom which has attracted these difficulties to you to help you develop personal and soul growth. You better than most can understand that the purpose of life is not happiness, but experience. Yet that does not mean you have to live your entire life feeling miserable. You may feel lonely, but this is because you are unwilling or unable to see that people really do love you. As I have mentioned previously, the problem may lie in your own opinion of yourself. You must first become a loving person yourself in order to attract love.

You may become defensive about expressing your real likes and dislikes for fear of being criticized or put down. You may have a jealous and possessive streak in you such that when you are in a relationship, you do anything and everything in your power to try to hold on to what you have. Of course this makes your partner feel as though they are in prison and they will try to escape the first chance they get, which is what you are fearful of in the first place. You must realize that you can never hold on to anything that doesn't want to be held on to. Love is free and there should be no contingencies placed upon it. You need to accept the difficulties you experience in life as spiritual lessons. These lessons are attempting to help you establish better values.

◾ Venus opposite Uranus; Venus square Uranus

You are excitable, spontaneous, and easily aroused emotionally and sexually. You crave emotional excitement and you tend to fall in and out of love very quickly, having little self-restraint or concern for propriety when your feelings have been stirred. Relationships begin with sudden, electric attraction, but they often end abruptly. You are unique, a bit eccentric and unconventional in your tastes and you don't mind experimenting. You love adventure, especially in your emotional life. You enjoy the thrill of the chase and you split when things start to get boring. You tend to be faithless in love — your strong suit is not in hanging around for the long haul. You prefer non-traditional relationships, ones that give you plenty of freedom and independence as you do not like to feel tied down. You like playing the field and settling down in a permanent, one-to-one relationship may be asking too much from you. In fact, you may intentionally choose partners who are otherwise unavailable because it helps keep things from getting too close and involved. You don't like strings attached to relationships and you prefer to remain rather detached with it all. There is the possibility of clandestine relationships.

You have a highly unusual and explosive emotional nature. You are temperamental and change emotionally as easily as the wind changes direction. You are troubled with the emotional ups and downs which you don't understand and you have the tendency to blame whoever is handy for your emotional lows. The crazy emotional tides which you feel are coming from within and they are because your creativity cannot find a decent outward expression. Use your wonderful creativity ability and your fine intuition in the pursuit of something artistically or musically creative. Then you won't be quite so at the mercy of your erratic emotions.

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astroboots · 1 year

Text

Personal Belongings

Summary: How Santiago lost his mother's necklace and Frankie ends up saving his life, aka the moment Santiago falls in love with Frankie.

Content: heavy angst content (Vegeta voice: it's over 9000!!!), blood, gore, violence, guns and injuries it's like a Tarantino movie in here.

Wordcount: 2,700

Homesick Masterlist | Homecoming Universe | Astroboot’s Masterlist

One of the first things they did to Santiago when he arrived at the military camp was to take away all his personal belongings.

The rule is: no jewelry allowed, unless it is a wedding band or a religious symbol. It meant that the only thing Santiago got to keep on his person that day was the catholic golden cross necklace that his mother had gifted to him at his Christening.

The official reason is that the military wants to ensure that every soldier complies with the strict code of appearance. Every soldier has to look presentable when they are representing the flag of the United States.

And sure, Santiago can be convinced that might definitely be a part of it. But even at 18 years old Santiago was smart enough to figure out that the real reason was to strip soldiers of their individuality and identity.

And that's what they did. They stripped him of every personal effect he was wearing on his person–every clothing item and every accessory. Heck even the glittery braided bracelet his niece had made for him before he shipped off was put in a metal tin box. The only thing left on his body that was not owned by the government was the symbol of the Crucifixion of Jesus.

Santiago might still be catholic under a technicality, but no one in their right mind would call him a devout believer. Not with the things he gets up to on a Sunday afternoon instead of going to Mass.

So it is incredibly ironic that the only item that was left was something that failed to reflect who he was in any real way that mattered, except that maybe he is a little bit of a mama’s boy.

It's a joke he loves to tell in a crowd. It always goes over well over a beer and a handful of tequila shots.

Things change when his mom passes away. It's no longer something he jokes about without feeling the crushing weight of loss dragging at his heels. So he doesn't.

Instead, he clings to the necklace as a source of a reminder of who he is: his mother's son.

Santiago does not wear it in any service for a higher power, but simply as a reminder of the person he loved the most in the world and the person who loved him back unconditionally. If the cross is a symbol of anything, he guesses it would be that. The reminder that he used to be loved.

The day Santiago loses his mother’s necklace goes like this:

They’re in the jungle. It’s hot and sweltering. The smell of rotten soil and sulfur is ripe and clings to every inch of his skin. It’s the kind of stench that is going to take weeks before he is able to scrub it off once he’s back to civilization.

He has a constellation of mosquito bites itching under his shoulder that he can’t reach to scratch. All in all, it’s a pretty shit day before it has even had time to start.

Morale is low, and the team is in a mood as rotten as the smell around them. The intel that got them here smells even worse.

On the way over, Frankie looks grim, and Santiago swears he can practically hear his molars grinding against each other.

"You okay there Frank?" Santiago asks.

Frankie look like the fucking world is ending, and shoots him a wordless look and nothing else. He doesn't have to say anything for Santiago to know what he's thinking.

It's never a good fucking sign if Frankie, who's the calmest in their unit is on edge. It's like the mine canary flapping its wings agitatedly seconds before dropping dead, a bad omen if Santiago's ever known one.

But it's not like they can turn back and call it a day, so the only thing they can do is soldier on and walk straight into the death trap that they all know it to be.

The only thing Santiago can do right now, is to make his best friend feel a little bit better and pretend they're not lambs being lined up for slaughter.

"Hey Frank, What do you call someone who joined the military out of spite?"

Frankie raises an eyebrow, then shrugs his shoulders and Santiago puts on his best shit-eating grin before he answers the man.

"A petty officer."

The dark cloud seems to clear from Frankie's expression and the man barks out a laugh, shaking his head but he can't wipe off the smile curling at his lips and he certainly can't hide it from Santiago even as he tugs down his cap as far as it'll go.

And as Santiago observes the man in front of him, eyes still crinkling with amusement, he can't help but think to himself that if shit goes down today, there's nobody else he'd have next to him.

They’re uncoordinated and out of sync from the get-go. Jimmy the newbie gets trigger happy, and bullets starts flying before Santiago's even had a chance to properly step foot in the building.

Ironhead is cursing up a storm, and gets zinged on his thigh, shouting at someone, anyone to cover his six, cause butter-fingered Jimmy is not standing where he was supposed to be standing.

Santiago gets three, maybe four clean shots in, before the orders to retreat sounds from the comms, not a second too soon, that have them pull back like a pack of sad looking dogs with their tails tucked between their legs, evading bullets and falling debris as best as they can to get back to the rendezvous point.

It's stuffy and hot, and Santiago's ears are ringing from gunshots fired off too close to his head. The walls are narrow, with live electrical wires that he's sure will end his life if he gets too close. There's protruding metal pipes poking at his back and neck, snagging across clothing and skin. He's bound to get tetanus even if he makes it out of here alive. It's a fucking mess.

Firefly's voice is on the comms, doing a roll call and it's not until Santiago readjusting his earpiece that he notices it.

It's not there.

Fuck.

His throat is bare.

Fuck.

His mother's necklace is not there.

fuckfuckfuck.

Where did it go? Where the fuck did it go!? Shit!

Cold sweat breaks out across the small of his back, trapped between his gear and vest and -- fuck, he can't think. Where could he have dropped it?

Everything is chaos around him, and his eyes flits between the concrete wall behind him, riddled with bullet holes, and the clear path in front of him back to the meeting point.

Someone is screaming his name, but he can't hear who it is over the cacophony of screaming and bullets being fired off in all directions. He can't goddamn think with all this noise. Just needs everything to shut the fuck up and stop for just a second so he can retrace his steps.

He still wore it this morning. Still had it in the vehicle. Pretty sure he felt the cool metal chafe against the bare skin on his collarbone as he stepped into this building. It wouldn't have just fallen off on its own. Something must've snagged it, he must've gotten it stuck somewhere. Shit where did it--

A sudden force yanks him backwards by his gear, and Santiago slams backwards into the wall with a blunt impact that punches the air out of his lungs. Frankie's face is inches from his, palm on his chest as he's pushing Santiago up against the wall, fury brimming in his eyes.

"Pope, what the fuck!" Frankie roars at him. "Pay attention to your goddamn surroundings! You almost got shot out there."

But Santiago doesn't take in his words, all he can think about is that narrow hallway. The protruding pipes and wires that had snagged against his skin on the way out. That's it isn't it? It's there, has to be there.

"It's in the building."

Frankie's looking at him like he's a madman, and he's probably right. "What?"

"I have to go back, Frank."

"Have you lost your goddamn--" Frankie doesn't get to finish the sentence before Santiago is already on his heels, charging back in.

It's all a blur. He doesn't know how he manages to evade the searing bullets that he can hear perforate the concrete, inches from his head. His heart is galloping so hard it's reverberating against his ribs like a stupid ping pong ball.

Blood floods his ears, and he can't really make out any sounds except for his own harsh and ugly breathing as he tries to race back to the same narrow hallway that he can see crystal-clear in his mind's eye.

The air is pungent with sulfur and burnt metal. The sound of pop, pop, pop, and high-tuned whistle that rings sharp and painful in his ears. Maybe he's grown too cocky and careless, just like Redfly warned him a million times before, but it doesn't even feel like a real threat anymore as he ducks and searches the dusty rubble of the ground for the familiar golden chain.

He doesn't make it far.

The first bullet goes straight through his right knee.

The second through his lower abdomen.

Santiago doesn't even feel the pain at first. Adrenaline kicks in hard and fast, pushing through his veins straight to his head. The rush is almost nice. Makes him lightheaded. Makes his steps feel light, even against the heavy sensation of dragging himself across the ground to take cover behind the wall.

He can't feel his face or his stomach where his hand is pressed up against the wet leaking wound to slow down the bleeding.

It serves him right. He's such a fucking idiot. This is why the army doesn't allow you personal belongings. So that idiots like him don't go and run back into the line of hostile fire, trying to retrieve things. It's baggage. Useless emotional baggage that you cannot afford to hold onto. This is how one dies in war.

His breathing is staggered. The pain is returning with a vengeance now that the initial burst of adrenaline is tapering off. It fucking hurts to breathe.

This is how he's going to die. He's going to die here. Like this. In enemy territory, some 7,000 miles from Florida. Away from his mother's house. Away from his childhood bedroom that he hasn't been back to for a year. But maybe that's just as well, his mother is no longer there after all. Will never be back there.

His fingers feel slick and the sting of rusted iron and gunfire is overwhelming his nostrils.

Santiago almost wants to laugh. It's a damn shame he dropped his mom's cross because if there ever was a perfect fucking time to take up praying again, this'd be it.

The insides of his mouth tastes like dirty metal (blood he realizes) and each breath comes with a staggering pain against his sides, until he almost wants to stop breathing.

Maybe this is okay, (fuck it hurts). Yeah this... this is fine. He's fine with this. That it's him lying here and not someone else. At least… at least it's him and not Firefly who's got a wife and a kid on the way. Or Ironhead with his younger brother and mom waiting for him at home. Or Catfish-- fuck thank god it's not Frank. Out of everyone, even though there's no one else he'd rather have by his side when he goes out in a blaze and glorious shame, now that it's happening Santiago is just really glad that it's not Frank lying here.

Hopes that Frankie's already stepping into the vehicle to safety back to their safehouse.

Santiago closes his eyes, forcing himself to breathe despite the pain. Frank's gonna be pissed. The anger that was already burning in his eyes when Santiago almost got shot... He doesn't even want to imagine how pissed the man will be when he finds out Santiago was shot. Twice.

His fingers are numb. He can't even feel the bullet hole anymore. Not sure if he's pushing down with the right pressure. Too hard? Not hard enough? Shit, it doesn't matter now. It's going to end regardless.

But it's fine. He's…. he's had a good run. Traveled to places places he'd never thought he'd get to set foot in as a kid. Laughed, drank, fucked.

It's the choice he made and he'd redo it all over again if he could. There's no regrets...

A phantom sensation lingers around his hand. The feeling of your pinkie curled around his. It lingers there, like you're standing right in front of him, the way you did three months ago by the drop off point.

Maybe one regret...

'I'll be back before you've had a chance to miss me.'

His only regret is that he won't be keeping his promise to come home to you.

He was supposed to take you to his cousin's wedding.

Supposed to take you to see that new Fast and the Furious movie.

Supposed to land at Tampa airport and see you standing there by the arrivals, with your welcome home balloons and your big smile and --

But it'll be--(oh fuck it fucking hurts)--it'll… it'll be okay (right?). You'll be okay, he's sure of it. Give it a year, maybe even two, and you'll be okay, you're resilient that way. The strongest, toughest person he's known in the two decades and then some on this blue planet. In a year, you'll move on. In a year, you won't wait for him to come home anymore. In a year you'll probably have forgotten his name.

You'll be--(jesus fucking christ, it hurts. he can't- it just hurts and oh god he doesn't want to di--)

"Garcia!"

It's Frankie's voice.

Fuck.

He's not supposed to be here.

He's supposed to be in the van. 70 miles per hour down the bumpy unpaved road they came from. Well on his way to safety. Not here, out in the open, where it's open season for a bullet to eat into his skull while trying to save Santiago's dumb and miserable ass.

Santiago takes one pained and staggered breath, breathes in the sharp rusted air that feels like knives and crushed glass into his lungs and opens his eyes.

The first thing that greets him is those familiar eyes, the same fury and anger burning in the brown charcoal as before. Frankie's pissed alright. There's an irate set to his jaw, as his arms comes around Santiago's torso. Frankie's solid strength dragging him backwards, screaming for backup.

Santiago doesn't remember much after that. He blacks out. Consciousness comes to him in bits and pieces. He vaguely recalls staring up at the blue, cloudless sky. Being propped up and held up as they haul him into the van. The bumps and snags on the road as he lays on the hard floor of the vehicle. Remembers seeing Frankie's calm, grounded brown eyes and hearing that familiar raspy tone telling him to "stay with me, Santiago".

He thinks he tries to answer Frankie with a yes. Instead all that comes out is a garbled choked sound steeped in blood.

But it doesn't even matter, all Santiago knows in that moment is that with this man by his side, watching his six, he could probably stay and live forever.

The one thing Santiago remembers clear as day is Frankie's voice echoing in his ears and the unwavering strength of his grip as his hand clutches onto his.

Despite the cold numbness that seeps into Santiago's chest, the warmth of the man's voice seems to heat him up from inside out.

"I've got you. I've got you, Santiago. It'll be okay."

…and for the first time, yeah, Santiago thinks maybe it will be after all. Even without the necklace. Even without his mom... There's still someone in this world who cares about his useless ass.

Dedicated to fellow angst monster queen who came up with this idea with me: my co-pilot thirstworldproblemss and some of the angstiest bits are written by her. Don't listen to her when she lies and says she doesn't angst. She angsts good.

Follow me on astroboots-writes and turn on notifications to be notified when I post something new!

#oscar isaac #pedro pascal #triple frontier #triple frontier fic #triple frontier fanfic #triple frontier fanfiction #santiago garcia #santiago garcia x reader #frankie morales #frankie morales x reader #santiago garcia x reader x frankie morales

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thenightfolknetwork · 5 months

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I've had problems with eczema for most of my life. Or at least, I thought it was eczema. What else would those patches of dry, hard, cracked skin be? It's never bothered me too much. I've always just slapped some cream on it and got on with my life (not those creams ever seemed to make much difference).

But a few weeks ago, a friend of mine (who is a creature themself) said that it looked less like eczema, and more like, well, scales. And now that I've actually thought about it, those strange patches don't really match the usual pictures of skin with eczema. They're too smooth, with an almost silver pigment in the right light.

So I've been researching, and wondering, and thinking about how I was always able to stay under the water so much longer than the other kids at swimming lessons, and contemplating the days I have when the air feels too thin, and wondering about the wrinkles on my neck.

The thing is... I've always thought I was sapio. I've tried to be a good ally to the creature community. I've tried to educate myself and support campaigns for creature rights. I've listened to the Nightfolk Network for years. I've got loads of friends who are creatures and I thought I was fully accepting. I've always said that the diversity of genuses in the world is a wonderful thing. But now that I'm wondering whether I might be a member of the creature community, I'm not sure that I'm as accepting as I've always thought. I've always talked about how members of the creature community are valid, but I'm only now realising that I saw them as definitely Other, definitely Not Me, perhaps even... not normal.

Questioning whether I'm fully sapio feels like a really drastic identity crisis. It feels uncomfortable. And surely if I really believed everything I used to say about decentering sapio narratives, I wouldn't feel this unsettled by the idea that I might be a member of the creature community. And how can I ask the creature community to accept me, if I don't really accept them as much as I want to?

I don't know what my question is really. I guess I'm just looking for a way to come to terms with this possible new information about myself. More importantly, I want to actually unlearn the idea that sapio is the norm, rather than just pretending to. Any advice?

I must say, you're being dreadfully hard on yourself, reader. You have put a tremendous amount of work into unlearning the sapio-centric narratives you've been immersed in since childhood, and it sounds as if you've made good progress to that end. But of course there is a difference between being accepting of diversity as an external question, and accepting a sudden, unexpected and unlooked-for change to your own identity.

You say you want to unlearn the idea that sapio is the norm. But I'm not sure I see any evidence here that you haven't already done that. The issue is that sapio has been your norm. That's not a matter of perspective or politics – it is simply true.

You didn't choose to be sapio, you don't think it is preferable to be a sapio than to be a person of the night. You simply believed yourself to be sapio. That's not prejudice, reader, any more than it is prejudiced to happen to have brown hair and so not consider yourself to be blonde.

I worry that your concerns on this front might be getting in the way of dealing with the emotional impact of this discovery. You are more than a mouthpiece for all the correct political opinions. You are more than a collection of opinions, each vetted and approved according to some external standard of moral purity.

You are a living, feeling, emotional person who has made a profoundly disruptive discovery about yourself, one which challenges every assumption you've held about your own identity and your place in the world. Take a moment. Breathe. Let yourself feel whatever it is you're feeling, whether or not you consider those feelings palatable. Let yourself be angry, or confused, or frightened, or any of the other very reasonable emotions this situation might have stirred up.

Your feelings don't make you a bad person. They don’t undermine the hard work you've done being a friend and ally to the creature community. And they aren't going to go away just because you argue with them.

In terms of helping you move forwards, you already have a strong network of liminal friends to lean on. Talk to them, get stuck in with the community, and learn by their example how to love your liminal self.

#answered #the nightfolk network #monstrous agonies

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filthforfriends · 1 year

Text

Glass Houses

Read parts 1 - 4 of DILFiano on my Masterlist

CW: Morally grey age gap and power dynamics.

Word count: 4.9k

Three hours: barely a respectable amount of time to party hop with your friends before asking to go home. It’s not like you didn’t have a good excuse: they wanted to drive over an hour to some bougie party in the hills. Icarus liked to use her dad's name to get into events every now and then, just for the thrill of it. Most of you were leaving for college on Monday anyway. This was one last hoorah.

“I just feel super nauseous.” The statement was an excellent way to get home because no one wanted you in their car.

“You better not puke, or I swear to god…” Icarus threatened

“It’s just nerves about the move. I’m struggling to remember why I wanted to attend college on the other side of the country.”

“You had like two sips of punch, anyways,” slurs Elliot.

“Fuck you,” playfully shout towards the backseat. “Someone needs to take care of your ass when you have alcohol poisoning!”

“Hey, I’m on your side!” protests Moxy.

“Oh, I’m sorry, love!” You blow kisses in her direction, both tacky and affectionate.

“Is it okay to just drop you off at mine? Or do you need me to take you home?” Your heart jumps at the prospect of spending time in the David’s home. Pretending you were on this little adventure for Icarus was morally exhausting. It’s not that you didn’t care about your friend, but because the globe had shifted its axis. Your world now revolves around Damia. Ingesting various substances, dancing until you broke a heel, and stumbling back to your car at dawn was totally ineffectual in comparison to him.

“You can drop me at yours, I don’t want to deal with getting my car tomorrow morning. Ugh! I’m just fucking tired for some reason.” You were wide awake and so impatient you couldn’t even disguise it. Luckily everyone’s attention was on Google Maps.

“Just crash at mine like we were going to do anyway,” Icarus offers. “And we’ll be home…” She looks back at Elliot, who’s scanning the directions on his phone.

“It’s an hour and 23 minutes away,” he supplies.

“Okay we’ll probably just sleep there then.”

“Sick! I’ve always wanted to spend the night in the hills!” Moxy is excited to cross something off her stereotypically L.A. bucket list. You try to be happy with her, but internally you’re counting the trees as they pass. While your physical form is trying to plaster a smile on her face in the passenger seat of Icarus’ G-Wagon, your mind is already at the David’s house. Biding your time on the ride was unbearable. You wanted to crawl out of your skin or just feel the dry desert air on your face as the wind rushed by.

The sound of the tires changed as Icarus turned from asphalt, to her smoothly paved driveway. You wanted to jump out of the car and sprint while the SUV rolled forward.

“Wait, what is the turn off again?” She whipped around, coordinating with Elliot.

“Uh, shit, let me check. I screen shot the directions in case my battery gets low.”

“You can just charge it.”

“I forgot my phone charger,” he groans, and Moxy rolls her eyes.

“I literally texted you –”

“Okay, okay!” He holds up his hands defensively. Elliot had smoked too much random weed at the second party and was jumpy as a result. It was a risky move, just taking whatever was offered with no questions. Sometimes you’d be fine and others you’d want to rip your eyebrows off.

“Are you playing nice back there?” Icarus called.

“Can I get out?” Keeping the urgency out of your voice was impossible.

“Huh, what?”

“The car is still moving,” you snap.

“Oh shit,” she puts it in park. A good person would make sure Icarus was absolutely fine to drive. A good person would make sure all their dumbass friends ended the night safely. A good person would put aside their own personal needs for the sake of others, but that had been your entire life. Tonight you weren’t going to be a good person, you were going to seduce your friend’s dad.

Hopping out of the car, you exchange various expletive ridden farewells. The wave of relief at watching your friends drive off was like fully exhaling for the first time tonight. How freeing it was to be in the company of someone you didn’t have to take care of.

Damia had the house to himself, now. Alexander stayed at his mothers apartment so his older sister could have a going away party. You wanted to know how exactly Damia came to chaperone. Did he volunteer? Were you on his mind every waking moment too?

After your meeting a week and a half ago, Damia hadn’t called or texted. You waited in rapture for the first four days, then gave up hope. A grown man isn’t going to chase after you like a teenage boy would. You’d have to earn that reverence. Holding it against him wouldn’t be fair, anyways. Chiara would probably use your relationship against Damia in court, trying to win sole custody of Alexander. She seemed like the type to play dirty, and with a heart as pure as Damia’s, that was reprehensible.

The house was dark, so you kicked your shoes off on the welcome mat instead of the tile, that way your arrival didn’t echo through the silent house. It felt early to you, but the kitchen clock read 12:07am. He must be asleep. You go to the trouble of depositing your belongings in Icarus’ room for appearances sake, before tip-toeing to the otherside of the house. Damia’s bedroom door didn't squeak when you opened it, the whole home was well-oiled and in perfect working order.

However, you could sense that Chiara’s presence here was waning. All of Damiano’s eclectic art she’d managed to arrange in an orderly fashion stood on its own. No longer balanced between a neutral-toned painting and a perfectly proportionate end table, the heavy colors of a disfigured facade leered at you from across the hall. Up until today, you’d thought the bust was of a humanoid face. Now it was so clearly a mask, crazed eyes boring through wind-warped wood from the other side of some secret.

Another painting had been moved from Damia’s office to the living room. The piece was both gory and abstract, radiating deviant energy. There were no mangled figures, but the blood red paint had been applied to look like straining muscular ligature. In fact, all the paintings that had newly achieved pride of place were disconcerting, which you realized, was the point. In an effort to find himself, Damia must first be uncomfortable in the world around him. He was too beloved for anyone to do that to Damiano except himself.

Walking into his bedroom, you found the space above the headboard surprisingly baren. At 15 years old, you'd snuck a peek during a dinner party. There was nothing remarkable about it. The David’s had an under-stated European style. Given how Damia had centered his sexual charisma as a musician, you’d expected plenty of nude imagery ranging from sensual to erotic. Hell, maybe even attachments for restraints on the bed. However none of this was true, and you’d shut the door, fearful of getting caught. All you could recall was the absence of things, but had no memory of what the master bedroom looked like.

In a room lit only by artificial light sleeping through the window, it was hard to decisively observe anything. After closing the door, you became distracted by the books. First and second editions of Maya Angelou, Willian Carlos Williams, Walt Whitman, Sylvia Plath, Virginia Woolf, Allen Ginsberg, and others whose names you didn’t recognize. There's a sensuality in your fingers running down every spine, as if caressing their drug addled ramblings.

Of course your eyes then fall to Damia. No one is more angelic when they slumber or more evocative of sin when they wake. The dark washes us clean. Maybe you and Damia could stay up all night together.

“Hey,” you whisper. He doesn’t stir and after a moment you're glad you haven’t woken him up. He lays on his side and you lift the covers, scooting in behind him. It wasn’t an unfamiliar position. You always rose first at sleepovers, even in elementary school. The boredom of waiting was hellish, but not now. Nothing could hold your attention more completely than the even rise and fall of Damiano’s ribcage as he breathed peacefully. In such close proximity, you could see he was shirtless and propped yourself up on one hand to admire him. The muscles of his pecs were relaxed as were his biceps. All this beautiful body resting easily, folded in on itself.

You lay back down before the urge to run your hands on his warm, freckled skin becomes overwhelming. Testing the limits, heart racing, you put the pad of a single finger on Damiano’s back and hold your breath. As far as you can tell he’s still sleeping. You scoot closer so certain places are just barely brushing against his body: knee, forehead, stomach, the back of your left hand. You imagine Damiano had invited you into bed with him, that you’d fallen asleep together like this, maybe after a night of love making. You press your lips to his spine, then can’t bring yourself to pull away.

Damia startles and flips over suddenly. The glass house you’ve built in your mind is shattered.

“Jesus Christ, you scared the shit out of me!” he heaves, hand to his chest. The mortification sets in. This wasn’t the slow, sensual wake up call you’d be hoping for, with kisses and gentle touches. Of course it wasn’t, because you were an 18 year old girl and a near stranger in his bed.

“Sorry, I’m sorry.” Damiano reaches over you for his phone and for a moment he’s held above you so intimately it makes your cunt throb. After a few taps his sighs and lays back on his bed, disposition changed.

“I take it Icarus is with her phone?”

“Yeah, of course! I wouldn’t – fucks sake I wouldn’t do this if there was any risk of be found.” It's then that the reason for Damiano startling occurs to you. “Oh shit, you thought I was Chiara for a sec.” You sit up, weight resting on your hip and left hand. Looking down at him felt so casual, a snapshot into a fantasy life.

“No, no. We haven't shared a bed in almost a year. This bed,” he pats the mattress on either side of him, “is brand new. I’d like to sell the house, but…it’s not the priority right now.”

“Alexander.” Damiano was trying to give some consistency to his son. He nods and puts his arm behind his head. His tattoos stretch across his skin. The claw of a sprawling dragon pierces the head of a sphinx because Damia hadn’t coordinated between tattoo artists. He says he prefers it this way.

“You’re a good father.” Damia snorts and you realize immediately why that might not have been the best comment.

“Oh am I?” God he’s gorgeous. His happy trail is dense because Damia’s body hair spans his lower stomach. It also partially conceals the coiled serpent on his sternum, and reaches across his pecs. You’d never slept with a man who had adult body hair. It must tickle. Everywhere.

“You could move to a different room? That should be a manageable amount of change.”

“The guest bedroom is right next to the kitchen, though,” he wrinkles his nose. Moving Icarus’ bedroom likely wasn’t on the table either.

“What about an add-on to the studio? Expand the bathroom, add a bedroom, and make all the Swedish producers sleep in here?”

“You know, that’s actually not a bad idea.”

“Sleep in the guest bedroom when Alexander has friends over.”

“So I can hear all the nefarious activities happening in my house,” he chuckles, nodding. “You're full of good ideas.” He extends a hand to your knee, face thoughtful. “You know what the issue here is though? You’re better at these conversations than my peers.” His words are the sweetest, most delicious, most unbearable torture.

“Damia, you can trust my discretion.”

“I trust you as much as I can possibly trust an 18 year old, since I’ve been one.” You don’t like this answer and he can see it. “Where is Icarus tonight?”

“Getting drunk an hour and a half away in the Hollywood Hills and spending the night. Probably will be too hung over to get home before 4pm.” Damia is bargaining with himself and visibly gives in.

“You can’t spend the night in my bed, but we can cuddle for a bit.” Is cuddling what he called tucking Icarus into bed? Or did he say something else like snuggle? Is cuddling what he called his caresses with Chiara? Which role are you: daughter or wife? You are neither.

“Also please don’t tell my daughter that I have a tracker on her phone. It’s for her own safety, but –”

“I understand.”

“Of course you do. This’ll be our secret too.” There was no earthly thrill like keeping a secret with Damia, because it created an intimacy that couldn’t be denied. Even if neither of you named it, that tether was made stronger. You wanted thousands of secrets with him, to drown in all the promises you made and kept like your life’s purpose.

You scoot closer, putting off the moment where this touch could feel parental rather than romantic. It was far worse: contrived. As you lay down on his chest, Damiano’s smell was everywhere: his bedsheets, his pillows, his skin. It was the perfect encapsulation of his sex appeal: mature, masculine, refined. His arm wrapped around your back, fingertips dragging up and down your side. The sensation made every hair stand on end and you shivered. Damia chuckled which broke the awkwardness.

Feeling a little shy now, you turn your face against his skin and get a whiff of body odor. For some reason you want to hide how hard your nipples are, like there was any point in decency now. The hand strewn across his chest comes alive, holding onto Damia’s ribcage. The deep breaths aren’t really enough. Some part of you wants to bite into the muscle of his pec to feel it in your mouth, dig our fingernails into his skin and drag him across the bed. Consume him whole. It’s so carnal that you don’t recognize yourself.

“Pheromones. The smell thing it's…you’ll grow out of it, I think.” Having your mind read by Damia evokes that forbidden, cherished memory under a vibrant sky. For the first time ever, you weren’t thinking of the kiss already. Damia falters in stroking your arm, eyes turned to the ceiling in thought as well.

“Then why is it so hard for you to hold back?” The outer corners of his eyes crinkle as Damia lets out a short laugh. He shakes his head, not at you, but at himself. He should have known you’d be capricious.

“You call this holding back? Hmm.” Damia brings you closer and presses his face to your scalp, breathing in deep. Mothers say the heads of their newborns smell sweet when making the same gesture. If not sweetness, then how did you smell to him?

“I’d say we’re doing a terrible job,” Damia whispers. Upon being released, you finally feel confident enough to give into the craving that nags you, throbs between your legs. Nuzzling his arm out of the way, you press your face into his exposed armpit.

“I’m sorry,” you apologize for your depravity, then take deep gasping breaths of Damia’s body odor. “Sorry,” you mewl, trying to scoot closer. His hair tickles your nose, lips, and cheeks. Damia lifts his arm, permitting easier access. You pet his armpit hair with trembling fingers and your knees bump his flank. Testing the limits, you open your legs and try to nudge his thigh in between. Only when he abides, do you realize why you want Damia positioned that way, why you want his thigh wedged as high up as you could get it.

“I’m sorry.” He shushes you soothingly.

“Sweetheart, stop apologizing.” You stick the tip of your tongue into the hollow of his armpit and taste the salty skin, then lick upwards. Thankfully, he’s not ticklish, but your rapid breaths against his wet skin makes Damia shiver.

“I want you so bad,” you whimper. “And if you’d just – I’d be happy just to give you a blowjob or handy or anything. If you wanted I’d eat you out. God, I’d lick you clean after a run. I don’t even need you to touch me, because just knowing that I got to touch you…I’d be so thankful and I’d never ask for anything again. I’d take it to my grave, I promise.” This had devolved from propositioning into pathetic begging, but you really were that desperate. Damia looks pained when you want him aroused.

“Sweetheart, if this situation were different –”

“But it’s not. This is the situation.” There's a flicker, a candle fighting the wind. Deep down, a fraction of a fraction of Damiano is considering it. Maybe pity wasn’t the way to go. He was so confident, he probably was attracted to confidence in return.

“Sorry that was rabid, um...” You have to instigate because Damia can’t. But push a little too far, he’d shut down completely and ask you to leave out of guilt. You commit to a course of action, rolling over to the side of the bed and peeling off your tights. Damia’s eyes go wide in alarm. Instead of taking the rest off too, you kneel in front of him, wearing just panties and a skirt.

“I want you to feel how wet you make me.”

“We can’t –”

“And I’m not asking you to do anything! I just want you to feel, just once. You don’t have to get me off, but I want you to know.” There's that flicker, no longer just one candle fighting the wind.

“This is a horrible idea,” Damiano responds, propping himself up on an elbow. “I can’t believe I’m…” He extends his hand and you shift position, parting your legs to make room. You pull his wrist under the skirt and his fingertips bump right above the waistline of your panties. Before you can control the reaction, everything tenses in excitement, pussy pleading for you to give it something to squeeze down on.

Damia’s gaze is knowing, but he doesn't break the asphyxiating sexual tension with a witty remark. He’s not going to invalidate this moment for either of you. Trying to read into that, you lower his hand a centimeter to your panties. Damia’s short fingernails catch on the elastic, but his eyes never leave your face. Rather than blush and turn away, you stare right back, pushing his fingertips past the waistband.

Of his own volition, Damia slides his hand between your legs. His mouth falls agape, because you’re so wet he has to focus on not accidently slipping inside.

“Tesorina, I –” he touches you at a loss for words. Damia sighs in admiration at how warm and silky your pussy feels. Out of habit, he goes to apply pressure just outside your vulva with his pinky and pointer, while his middle and ring finger play with your pussy. He has to stop himself. You almost wish Damia was wearing a wedding ring so your body’s lubrication could loosen it.

“You feel lovely,” he purrs, pulling his hand back. You close your legs around his touch, clutching it between your thighs. It fits there so perfectly that you can’t help but rock against his palm. Both hands wrap around his wrist. A shameless part of you uses the grip to work back and forth against him.

“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry, but mm please – don’t –” Damia wedges his upturned hand firmly against your vulva. “Oh my god,” you mewl, careening forward. You get fistfuls of the quilt and cry out, pelvis naturally finding a rhythm to rock against Damia’s hand.

“Ah mm, I’m sorry.”

“Shh, stop apologizing,” he insists in a whisper. Damia isn’t even concealing the relief in his expression at you making this decision on his behalf. Testing the boundaries, you sit back on your heels and give Damia’s hand your weight. He applies firm upward pressure to counteract and your source of friction ends up being even more snug against your pussy.

“Fucking, fuck. Thank you,” you moan, grinding your clit against the heel of his hand.

“Right now, it's okay to listen to your body, tesorina.” Experimentally, Damia’s finger slides into the divot of your vaginal opening. He strokes your hymen in circular motions. Without using any pressure, Damia allows just the tip of his middle finger to slip inside. A car drives by and the headlights momentarily illuminate half of Dami’s face. You can’t tell if it's the half he shows the world, or the half he’s failing to hide from you.

Captivated but conflicted, Damia drags the arousal up to your clit, middle finger dipping out of your hymen. Immediately you're grieving the lack of intrusion with a whine. Upon reaching the crest of your labia, he brushes back and forth in progressively smaller strokes. Damia uses a massaging motion around and on your clit. Rather than blindly picking a spot to rub, he allows the messy slickness of your pre-cum to inform his movements.

At first you're in awe of his presion while so deep in thought. Until you realize that subconsciously, your hips were shifting to bring his touch to the best spot. Under all that focus, he was listening to your body’s minute signals. When Damia does find your clit, he puts it directly under his thumb and your hips buck violently.

“Are you sure?” Something changes in the way he’s positioned. One of his fingers is extended and you falter as he presses it inside. It’s all you can do to nod. Head hung, your expression is corrugated by pleasure. He curls the digit against your g-spot and now your hands are pushing the blanket away, back arching, mouth falling open as your moan.

“Hey, look at me,” Damia prompts “Are you really, really sure?” It’s absurd for him to expect an answer while he finally pleasures you. Maybe this isn’t an overwhelming amount of stimulation for some women, but you’re on the verge of full body trembles. Damia holds your clitorous between his fingers internally and externally and stays consistent, titrating the pressure up and down, trying to find that sweet spot for you. One hand tightens its grip on Damiano’s wrist as insurance. The other is planted in front of you, bringing your face closer to his.

“Sweetheart?”

“Yes.” Your intrepid confidence issues a scorching challenge. If this interaction ceases out of someone’s fear, it wasn’t mine. Because I am sure. You hold eye contact, gaze completely level. Equal. No longer a little girl in need of a replacement father figure. Damia returns your gaze, alarmed at your power, but also something like impressed. His pupils flit down to your lips. Eyes. Lips. Ridiculing himself. Lips, again.

“If you have the slightest doubt, tell me.” There's a sinking sensation in your stomach, not out of regret, but out of the knowledge of how wrong this was. It just made the whole thing more enticing; a door into the world of depravity that you coveted. People expected you’d spend your life as a righteous woman. Instead you wore a lacy thong under your skirt to seduce your best friend’s father when she was driving on the 405 tipsy.

“If holding on to me feels good, that's fine, but I won’t pull away if you let go. I’m not cruel.” Damiano visibly makes the same kind of enduring moral concession. During which, his hand had stilled in the last few moments, but you didn’t have the decency to stop using it as a source of stimulation. It was an inexcusably filthy thing to do, hump Damia’s hand with so much vigor it made you sweat. It was fucked up. While Damia couldn’t bring himself to verbally encourage it, his eyes begged you not to stop.

It was the briefest glimpse into the version of himself that Damia chained to the back of his mind, because it was a danger to his own reputation. A version of himself that sought out rules so his unquenchable rage had something to pulverize. That version of Damiano was allowed to fixate on the girl who fell to her knees in public and begged to blow him. He was allowed to accept the offer, and drag her back to the backseat of a car and have her ride his thigh. Both over and under the trousers, depending on which she liked better.

“I know you’re desperate just from touching yourself, because sex toys are still embarrassing at your age. I could probably just buy you one, but…” he clicks his tongue at an intrusive thought and shuts his eyes. Jaw set, Damia carefully gets himself under control, but can’t stop the hand against your thigh from shaking.

“I know you’re desperate because you’re so turned on that I can feel your heartbeat.” His fingers slowly curl towards your belly button as his thumb draws a straight line up your vulva. A breath gets caught in your chest, the pressure underneath your sternum threatening to become a scream.

“Please, please, ” you babble, mouth falling open when he finds your clit again. With the plentiful pre-cum, Damia runs his fingers back down your pussy and inside. The reentrance makes a squelching sound from all the wetness and you cringe hard, eyes closed in embarrassment.

“Shh, tesorina. Did you know most people have to use lube to get this wet? Hmm?” You had so much to learn. Why couldn’t he teach you? Damia’s fingering feels amazing, the slightest bit of delicious strain. You realize that he’d been using two. It’s more than you’d attempt so soon, but totally painless. Of course, Damia would know your body better than even you.

“How's that?”

“I didn’t think that I could take...but it feels mm.” You shift your hips side to side, exploring new sensations.

“Of course you can,” he coos. Just as it had reflexively a minute ago, your body bears down out of a desperate craving for internal stimulation. This time you get to squeeze down on two thick fingers and that relief brings you to your forearms.

“Damia, oh my god,” you moan. At this point, you’re just breathing in your own hair where it falls around your face. Damia uses his spare hand to pull it from your mouth and tuck it behind your ear. Somehow, it's the most intimate thing he’s done today.

“Do you want to try three?” No one had ever asked you that. It was counterintuitive to the goal of staying tight. It felt like you could take three. Maybe you’d really enjoy it, even if that was wrong. The stretch of two was deeply satiating.

“Sweetheart, it’s okay if the answer is yes.” He sets his hand on your thigh and rubs up and down slowly.

“Yes,” you blurt, scooting your legs apart to create room. Damia works the third one inside much differently than the second. He starts with his pinky, just pushing the tip past your hymen. That’s easy after a couple passes, so he switches to using the pointer as the third finger. You’re frozen in anticipation for something you’d never allowed yourself to be interested in. When he pushes three inside you adjust your pelvis without thinking about it.

“See how you spread your legs to open your hips? It's totally intuitive. Never let anyone ignore your desires.” Listening attentively, you manage to integrate all three fingers to the last knuckle. It takes a little force from Damia, which just makes the whole thing hotter. The flat of your hand slams against the mattress in stimulation. A whine turns into a throaty moan that wasn’t supposed to escape.

“Mm, see? No one teaches women how good having your pussy stretched feels.” You’re nodding in agreement even though Damia hasn’t asked a question. He thrusts his fingers in and out at a relaxed pace. At some point during this exchange, Damia went from laying under to kneeling on top of the comforter to be closer. The hand stroking your flank was equal parts sexual and reassuring.

“I could fit four fingers if I wanted too, hm? I could fit my whole hand, even. Would you like my whole hand inside you, tesorina?” You think about it, nod, and turn bright red. Even too embarrassed to meet Damia’s eyes, you can feel his smile. He’s thrilled at your honesty in this moment of self-discovery.

“Now I bet you didn’t know that about yourself until I asked. Here's the secret: most women love the way this feels. A woman, when she’s aroused, relaxed, and really wet because someone’s been patient with her, can fit more than just a cock. She can fit a cock and a finger, a cock and a toy. Never let anyone shame you for what it takes to feel full. It's your pleasure.”

Notes: No, that is not the end of the scene, however it is the end of my patience. My blog has been broken for months and it hasn't been fixed. For one, I can't tag people, hence the lack of taglist. PLEASE submit a help to Tumblr on my behalf. Yes, I know you're not supposed to, but I've resorted to annoying them into action. I'll post the rest once people can actually see my writing.

#daminao #damiano david #damiano maneskin #damiano david imagine #damiano david smut #damiano david fanfiction #damiano david x reader #maneskin #måneskin #må #maneskin fanfiction #maneskin imagine #maneskin x reader #maneskin smut #damiano david x you #age gap fanfiction

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letters-to-rosie · 7 months

Text

other Arcane questions for thought

(just saying I don't need these to be answered in the show, but these are things I'm genuinely curious about and are fun for the purposes of using the show as a site from which we can do political critique, because I'm a nerd who does this for fun and thinks about this stuff for fanfic; speaking of that feel free to steal any of these questions for fic purposes lol)

(also I put some questions on the end of this post)

so, like, what does Heimerdinger think of the whole mining colonies thing? he's been around since the start of the city; was he for establishing them or against? how does all this square with his personal code of ethics?

and on that note, why does he seem so ignorant about Zaun? why is the council so ignorant about Zaun in general when it's literally right there? has the council always been this way?

how did the great houses become great? did they do something? did they have a lot of money like Mel's family? is it a combo? has anyone ever lost great house status? if so, how?

Piltover becomes a global shipping lane. who do they ship to most and why?

how did Vander start his bar? what kind of booze do they have? what do Zaunites have available to ferment? are they getting everything imported?

is Piltover in charge of all the ports? ship trade seems like a big deal, which makes sense given the location. who's in charge of ports on the Zaun side if there are any? (again I'm asking why the council is so ignorant lmao)

who owns the mines? are we doing mercantile capitalism or like private enterprise capitalism?

what do they even make with the stuff from the mines? what are they mining? I have so many questions about the mines

we know the council members have staff because of Jayce. how easy is it to become a member of the staff? are they all nepotism jobs lol?

I'm just so curious about how Silco's political development goes down. he has very obvious reasons for not liking Piltover lol but I wanna know what his "hey this sucks" moment was (love fics that go into this sort of thing for any of the characters)

do other countries in the world know about the situation in Zaun under Piltovan control? do any of them oppose it on moral grounds? (would be really fun for an OC fic)

big one: we see child labor is pretty common in the setting, not only through Silco's factory but also Ekko being a child worker. what's going on with all that? do they have schools? is there an apprenticeship system? is it just regular child labor lmao

also do they have therapists because Jayce sure needed one when he almost got banished and then immediately jumped to taking his life like has anyone invented psychiatry yet

why are Noxian spirits an illegal import what the hell did they put in there (or is it like an economic protectionist thing which could be possible but more boring than the "Noxians have weird booze" thesis)

#arcane #arcane meta #never mind apparently I am doing a historical materialist analysis of the setting and it is very fun lol #gonna need to go into more detail in the future

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frankieispunkk · 11 months

Text

Pedro and co helping you through a autism/ adhd burn out 🩷🫶🏻

Lil side note,burn outs can last months and show’s differently on every auhd/ptsd person. (Burn out is very common in the autistic community,I myself have spent most of my adult life in burn out,every person’s experience is different,but I’m speaking in my experience and things that helped me through it,if you are going through burn out right now,my dms are ALWAYS OPEN) even if you just want to ask a “silly” (no question is silly) about dealing with auhd or just MH in general. Also THANKYOU FOR THE LOVE ON THE LAST POST,it means SO MUCH 😭

Pedro himself 💜🕺

This man often suffers from burn out himself and knows exactly what to do,he will run you a relaxing bath with loads of bath salts and offers to stay with you while you soak,then he will put a frozen pizza in the oven and put on your favourite comfort movie,if you fall asleep while watching it he will carry you to bed and join you there just the sounds of your soft breathing will send him asleep,he’s struggled with sleep in the past but now you’re here,he loves it. Just sleeping with you is the best thing,he could do it forever if the world let him. (Side note to this one,as much as I love Pedro with my whole heart I feel a little uncomfortable writing about him as a person and not his characters,what happened in Malta recently kinda shook me. Pedro deserves all the love and respect in the world <3)

Frankie morales 🚁🐟

Frankie gets home from a long day at work to find you curled up on the sofa,you’re not asleep but you might as well be. Your tired eyes and posture give it away and Frankie is immediately at your side,making sure you’re ok getting you water (please hydrate yourself) and telling you about his day to distract you from the exhaustion and depression you’re feeling,he runs his fingers through your hair and kisses your forehead gently “sleep bebita I’ll be here when you wake up i promise” and with that you slowly close your eyes,knowing Frankie will always be there for you through everything.

Joel miller (pre outbreak) ⚒️🖤

Joel comes home around 9:30 Sarah is already in bed and your huddled up on the sofa half asleep,”hey sweetheart how was your day” Joel says while sitting down next to you,”it was ok,I’m fucking exhausted all this work is getting on top of me” you say as you slump into his arms”oh darlin you should of said something,I would of gave that dickhead boss a piece of my mind he chuckles. “Have you eaten?” He says softly, “no” you murmer into his neck,his scent feels like home,it grounds you. You give him a small kiss on his jawline,” you need to eat something sugar” he whispers into your hair,” I know I don’t feel like eating right now”

“Not even mine and Sarah’s special pancakes?” he laughs softly,”I already feel like shit I don’t need food poisoning” you tease. “Hey we’ve only accidentally poisoned you once” he laughs softly and tickles your neck with his stubble slightly. You sigh softly “I love you so much Joel,the both of you”

“We love you too sweetheart,Sarah loves you as her own mum and you know how much I love you” he lightly kisses your shoulder blade and you hum softly “let’s get you to bed darlin” let’s just say both you and Joel didn’t get any sleep that night,Joel too busy worshipping every inch of your body and soul.

Javier Peña 🚬🥀

You and Javi aren’t exactly “together” as per say but you both know it’s more than a FWB situation,you love him…but you’re too scared to say it,you’ve seen the other girls he’s slept with,they are beautiful,slim,all a man could want…and your..you,you have stretch marks all over your shoulders and legs,you have a tummy that sticks out and thighs that touch..you never get why he choose …you to sleep with,not another beautiful women..it’s now like he can’t get the women,he is beyond gorgeous…and actually quite an attentive lover.all these feelings start to overwhelm you and before you know it you’re sitting down in bed with a tub of icecream crying to yourself,there is suddenly a Knock at the door and you know exactly who it is…. “Shit I look like crap” you say to yourself fixing your hair a tiny bit. You open the door to see a tired looking Javi “hey hermosa,have you been crying? Why have you been crying cariño” he rests his hand on your shoulder and pulls you into a hug “Dime querida, ¿qué tienes en tu hermosa mente?” He’s speaking Spanish to you,fuck you love it when he does that,almost makes you fold immediately “I feel like…I’m not good enough for you” you softly say “all the girls…you’ve had in the past are so much more beautiful that me,I feel ugly and disgusting” you say into his shoulder.

cariño, bebita you are so beautiful,so unbelievably gorgeous I wouldn’t have you any other way. Fuck them girls who I used to hang around with,they didn’t mean anything to me. Nothing like you mean to me,they didn’t make me feel the way you make me feel. They…didn’t make me c*m the way you make me cum hermosa,you are so much more than a hookup to me cariño…I want to take you on dates ,treat you right,show you how goddamn beautiful you are.I want to be the boyfriend you need…I want to protect you from all the harm in the world. Javi says softly into your hair and looks up at you”will you let me do that cariño?” Your in tears by now, “Javi I never thought you liked me like that,I thought I was just stress relief for you” you say with tears streaming down your face”

“You mean the fucking world to be Benita” “I want to make you the happiest woman alive” he whispers,”it’s always been you” “it’s always been more than just a meaningless fuck,every single time. “I fall for you more every time.”

You can’t do anything but looked shocked, he kisses you deeply and you give into the kiss,his grunts and your moans spurring each other on “let me make love to you cariño” he whispers.

He makes love to you all night long,with promises to protect you all his life.

(I went on a tangent here I’m very sorry💀😭

Marcus (soft boi) pike 🩷🫠

Marcus calls you from work (like he always does) to find that your voice is small and tired at the end of the line “what’s the matter sweetheart,I can tell something is the matter” he says softly, “I just…can’t handle it anymore” you say while trying not to cry “can’t handle what baby? “Everything” your voice catching in the back of your throat. “Oh baby girl I’m so sorry…I should be home more often,to look after you,i know your struggling right now,I can see it in your face every morning,I’m so fucking sorry I’m at work right now,Im coming right home” “It’s not your fault” you cry, “I’m your husband,i should be there for you,just hang on tight ok sweetheart I’m coming straight home”

He hangs up the phone but calls you back on his mobile,”im here baby girl,im leaving work now ok?”

“Ok” you sniffle “I love you” you say quietly.

“I love you too,so much,do you need anything from the shops darling? Food, drinks? “

“Just you” you sniffle

Marcus gets home around 15 minutes later and finds you on the couch crying silently

“Oh darling,come here” he sits next to you and immediately wraps his arms around you “it’s ok,I’ve got you baby,I’ve got you” he whispers “shh shh” he strokes your hair softly and plants a kiss to your forehead “what’s got you like this huh,do you know or is it just one of those days”he whispers “I don’t know” you cry. “I understand sweetie,want me to run you a bath?” “Stay with me” you mumble “okay I’ll stay right here” “I’ll be right here” he whispers softly “I love you so much,you’re so strong baby this will pass I promise”

He runs his fingers down your back gently and then lets you hold him close,you fall asleep in his arms that night,but as usual you wake up in bed. You have developed a massive migraine,you look over to your bedside table to see water and some tablets,marcus has already thought this through,you take the tablets and gulp down the water and lie back down in bed snuggling into Marcus. He stirs a bit,”you ok baby” he whispers “have you got a headache,I brought tablets up last night just in case you did this morning” he says sleeply.

“My head is hurting like bitch but I’ve already took the tablets” you say softly into his chest,”thank you sweetheart,thank you for everything you do for me,I love you…so much. You kiss his neck softly,and slowly fall back asleep on his chest,his heartbeat grounding you.

#marcus pike x reader #pedro x reader #pedro pascal headcanon #pedropascalcomfort #frankie morales #javier pena fic #marcus pike #marcus pike x you #autism #adhdlife #burnout #pedro pascal cinematic universe #pedro pascal x anxious reader

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ouroboros-hideout · 11 days

Note

*pulled back into ask box like a magnet*

Phantom of Night City and The Wasteland for Aon, maybe? Never enough of Knife Queen insights

p.s. The Wasteland could be not necessarily about Raffen Shiv, but maybe other Nomad clams with the same "style" of operation

More Knife Queen you want, more Knife Queen you get!

Phantom of Night City What does your OC believe about death and what comes after?

She doesn't think much about it. It's going to happen, sooner or later. It's inevitable, it could happen tomorrow or in a few years. She has faced her early death several times and her job and the people she does business with do not contribute to a secure life. It is a risk that is constantly with her. However, that doesn't mean that she wants to put herself in danger. She can't imagine what comes after death. She doesn't believe in an afterlife or a paradise that awaits her. The concept of reincarnation is also somehow “too high” for her and in general there is no point in worrying about something so abstract in her eyes as she is more of a person who lives in the here and now and doesn't make any big plans for the future anyway.

The Wasteland How does your OC feel about the Raffen Shiv? Is it too harsh what the Nomad clans do or is it fair?

I can imagine, or hc that there are similar clans/or one clan in the Sovjet Union aswell so she is familiar with these extreme radical groups. Since the Scavs are probably from that part of the world, I could imagine that they might be connected to such a clan but dunno. She herself is of course no saint and has spent her life in legal gray areas like probably most nomads and now makes most of her profit from weapons and other machines for war, but the Raffen are just a gang of psychos in her eyes. For her, family cohesion within a clan has always been of great importance, as well as things like honesty and keeping agreements, business or private. She has been part of many crooked deals, but everything has always been morally justifiable for her up to a certain point. Over the years, the relationship within the family she belonged to deteriorated and things came to light about their leader that ultimately split the group into two parties - those who stayed in the clan and those who left the streets with Aon and settled in the mine. After that, they didn't hear much from their former family, but what they did hear was similar to the conditions that exist at the Raffen.

#oc: aon #ask game #writing stuff

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perfectlyvalid49 · 2 months

Note

Entering your asks because I have seen your post about Jewish trauma and replies all over my dash (and only doing it on anon because of how stilted and awkward I always am with strangers that I admire). Your patience and earnest attempts to educate and inform those too stubborn, arrogant, and convinced of their absolute moral correctness is astonishing, and I am sorry the world's once more in such a state of hate that you had to make that post in the first place, let alone deal with a mess of antisemitic BS in the notes. (I am sorry we goyim on the left are failing the Jewish community as badly as we are. We never seem to learn, no matter how patiently you hold our hands through the explanations.)

You seem to be all kinds of awesome.

First, thank you!

Second, I’m sorry for being all over your dash. It was a long post to begin with and it only got longer as everybody yelled at the anti-Semite. It was all over my dash too, and *I* was beginning to find it annoying.

It feels weird to be admired, as I think my most notable qualities are “good at remembering rules to TTRPGs,” “incredibly stubborn,” and “does not know when to shut up.” If you feel more comfortable on anon, that’s fine, but if you ever want to put your name on things, know that most of my friends (myself included) are in the “neurospicy and have less than awesome social skills” group, so awkward isn’t going to bother me any.

The patience comes from having two elementary aged kids. If I can deal with a toddler, I can deal with an adult acting like a toddler. Also, I used to be a receptionist at a pediatrics office – so I actually have a lot of experience customer servicing adults acting like toddlers, to be honest.

As for a willingness to educate, I genuinely believe that hatred in all its forms comes from ignorance. It’s much easier to hate a faceless entity than a real person, and it’s easier to hate a group that you have no experience with than to hate a member of that group that you’re having a conversation with, especially when they’re being reasonable. I’ve been a LOT of people’s first Jew, and I don’t mind being the person to show that Jews are just normal people. Even if the person I’m in conversation with isn’t getting it, my hope is that someone on the sidelines – either their followers or mine, will.

There are two Jewish concepts at play here. The first is “tikkun olam,” or “repairing the world.” The idea is that the world is not perfect, and it is our duty to make it better. I feel like educating people, and hopefully reducing hate is a way of doing that. The other is a quote from the Talmud - “You are not obligated to complete the work, but neither are you free to desist from it.” I don’t have to teach everyone, but when presented with the opportunity to teach someone, I have to at least try. The way I see it, doing this is part of how I practice Judaism.

As for the goyim on the left, a lot of them have let me down. But every once in a while I get an ask or a message like this from someone who seems to understand. Or I’ll point out someone’s antisemitism, and they’ll actually listen to the criticism and try to do better. It gives me hope. Since I made that post, I’ve received kind messages from a handful of people privately, plus there’s been some love in the tags on reblogs. Between that and getting all that off my chest in the first place, I honestly feel better now than I did a week ago. Thanks to everyone who helped with that, including you, Anon.

#asks and answers #reasons why I leave anonymous asks on

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owlhousetarot · 11 months

Note

I saw your post about the remaining cards you still have to do, and I would like to put out two ideas of mine that I think fit.

Card 1: The Magician

I think Adrian Graye (illusion covenhead) could fit this card. Granted I'm tapping more into the illusion magic aspect but it could work.

Explanation: The main aspect of him is that he is creative with his illusion magic and is no doubt the most skilled in illusion magic being a Covenhead afterall. (Besides Gus who is 12) He is resourceful in his own way of having the coven scouts be used as "actors" (in the way he directs them like a director) as well as figuring out that placing an illusion of Belos would stop Hunter in his tracks to catch him. He also was willing to do anything to achieve his goal (capturing Gus and Hunter and going as far as to psychologically torture Gus to get the location of the galdorstones). In terms of the reversed meaning, he can be a bit out of touch because he's seen to basically abort his own mission from Belos and instead used his magic/resources as an opportunity to do something for his own personal gain (getting Gus) at his expense. He also stops himself (unknowingly) as he knows what he wants/expects from his scouts, yet he gives poor/not clear feedback to them. Which is often misdirected which causes their illusions to be detected by Gus.

Card 2: Justice

I think Raine Whispers and at most Eda too pictured could work.

Explanation: Raine is a morally good character who who seeks to know the truth of The Day of Unity as well as disassemble Belos’s plan for it. (And at most tell others about Belos’s lies) This is because they care about the freedom of witches and deep down, they know its right to put a stop to Belos. They do feel a bit conflicted about it as they have to sacrifice their relationship with Eda by either dying in action in Eda's Requiem or by not talking to her to avoid Eda's safety being put at risk. I think in terms of the reversed meaning, the last thing stated could tie into a lack of communication/ accountability as they didn’t talk to Eda. In terms of the reversed theme of corruption, Eda's magic corrupted Raine's music and is what allowed them to come up with the suicide mission they were on to take down Darius and Eberwolf (and by extension The Day of Unity). The theme of corruption can also be tied to Raine pretending to be brainwashed, as they had to (kinda) lie to Eda about playing the part in Follies at the Coven Day Parade.

Card 12: The Hanged Man

I think the specific scene of Luz saying bye to her mom near the end of Yesterday's Lie could tie into this card.

Explanation: this is going to be shorter (I hope). Luz in the scene is literally hanging from a rope and has to let go of her mom to get back to Eda. She's sacrificing seeing her mom again. Then when comes back to Eda, she has to think about what her next action is (tell Eda and Amity about what her mom said to her coming back). If I remember correctly, I think this was the last episode of season 2A, so the audience watching was on pause/waiting for the next episode to see what Luz was going to do. This also bleeds into the reversed meaning as Luz (in Follies) was fearful of telling Amity and her friends of what happened. She was a bit indecisive and didn't know what to do.

Card 21: The World

I'm thinking more literally on this one and I think the entire 9 Covenheads pictured would be cool. Or just the idea of covens in general.

Explanation: The idea of covens when Luz first saw them was in a positive light, saying that there was a sense of community/ integration with witches and having a sense of belonging. This would also fit with the double meaning of harmony/unity as a tie with the Day of Unity. In terms of the reversed meaning, the covens are always trying to gain new members, so they're never fully complete as Belos wants as many witches in them. Another thing is that witches lose the rest of their magic and it may even lead them to feeling incomplete without all of it/ the magic being restricted.

I hope this doesn't come across as a lot, I just saw this post and had to share my ideas. (Also can you tell I'm hyperfixating on this show lol I love it to peices)

Also I just saw this now so I have no idea how old this post is, but I hope you at least enjoy my ideas if you haven't started the these cards already.

(Also I'm totally going to get this deck when it comes out I love it already)

Aaa I ADORE your ideas!! I was actually REALLY close to using that exact scene for the hanged man card, but ended up with the design I have because Yesterday’s Lie works really well for a later card and because I needed more King in the major arcana (especially since this deck is already gonna be so Luz-heavy lol)

And while yes unfortunately I have already made all of these cards, I enjoyed reading through your ideas! (And if anyone were to make art of these, or any other cards in the deck, I would love to be tagged so I could see it 👀)

#lunar answers #I really love raine as Justice too - it fits their character so well

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romantichomicide95 · 11 months

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the self ship ask prompts are too CUTE!!!

how about 😍 and 😘 with the trio (levi, gumi bear and gojo)?

I call him Gumi bear too 🥺

Levi:

😍Name your three favorite things about your f/o?

He’s caring/empathetic, probably the most caring person I’ve ever known. He has a strong moral compass and cares so much about humanity and the people around him. He genuinely hates how much death we see and it takes a toll on him even if he doesn’t show it to people.

He’s able to see the potential in anyone, including me. Even if you don’t see it in yourself.

His sarcastic sense of humor which is a lot like mine. Our banter can be really flirty and kind of sexy because of it.

Bonus- Despite everything’s he’s been through he’s able to push forward and keep fighting and I admire that about him. He doesn’t give up, even when faced with things that would make others run in the opposite direction.

😘What’s your f/o favorite thing about you?

My resolve in saving people. I’m not as strong as him but he loves that I genuinely want to help people and care about the fate of humanity. It’s why I joined decided to join the Scouts in the first place.

Megumi:

😍Name your three favorite things about your f/o?

Under his stoic exterior he cares about his friends, more than he cares for himself sometimes. He always put others first and is the least selfish person I know. (Although I’d prefer if he would put himself first in lots of situations.) I also actually like his stoic demeanor, he’s calm and collected and speaks very carefully. He’s not highly energetic and I find that calming.

He is very good at reading people and their emotions. He can always tell how I’m feeling and genuinely cares, always let’s me rant to him even if he has no input or advice.

He’s intelligent. He prefers reading books to video games and other things like that. He’s smarter than anyone I know. I think his intelligence makes it easy for him not to follow the ideals of our elders and instead forge his own path based on his inner thoughts/feelings.

😘What’s your f/o favorite thing about you?

My empathy. He loves that I care so much about the people around me, including the way I care for him.

Gojo:

😍Name your three favorite things about your f/o?

He wants to create a better world for the generations after us. He cares a lot about his students and bringing out their best. He wants them to grow up in a world different than the one we did, he could be doing anything but he chose to be a teacher to see that dream come true and he loves and wants the best for his students. He sees the potential in each and every one of them, striving to make them better.

His carefree attitude and general silliness. Our relationship is fun and always adventurous. We can laugh together for hours. Most people are annoyed by him but I think being silly helps him, he’s the strongest sorcerer and I think his demeanor offsets that a little. He carries a lot of weight on his shoulders and his resolve to change the world can be a lot. Being silly is a good way to relieve some of that stress.

He’s not afraid to stand up for what he believes it. Even if he is the only one standing. He will stand up to the elders and doesn’t care if it pisses them off.

Bonus- He’s hot AF

😘What’s your f/o favorite thing about you?

He loves the way I love him. Being at the top can be lonely, he’s strong and his demeanor can be off putting. People don’t understand him the way I do and he appreciates that I can see past his outward behavior to the person underneath.

Side note: damn that took me so long to write lmao. Gojo was the hardest for some reason. I love his character a lot don’t get me wrong he’s my second favorite but I mostly self ship him in an nsfw way cause he can get it, Idk that I self ship for real with him now that I think about it.

come ask me questtions about my self ships

#anon asks #ask games

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dulcetpill · 1 year

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hiya! for the beyond evil ask thing 🎵

Thank youuu for interacting, you lovely person with a very good name<3

🎵 What five songs do you associate with Beyond Evil?

I realized I don’t have that many song associations in general, especially if not counting those that are caused by fandom video edits. Quite often, listening to a song and hearing an exceptionally good line, I get a moment of association (“oooh, this is so jwds-core!!”), but the song as a whole doesn’t make me think about Beyond Evil (or any other media for that matter). But I’ll try to scrounge up some good ones and not cheat with easy fandom-edit picks :P

Дарья Виардо — Возвращайся домой Daria Viardo — Come Back Home

A gentle, sorrowful song in Russian about dealing with loss, pointlessly hoping that your loved one will come back home just like usual, as if returning from a very long walk.

“But I wait on the porch I’m covered in mold But I wait on the porch In the hope of saying “hello” once more.”

It’s so Dongsik-about-Yuyeon… I even contemplated making an edit with this song, but I don’t have the will to cut all of the appropriate footage for it, and not many people would be able to appreciate it fully anyway. But the song is still wonderful. A real tearjerker.

“And even if I know There won’t be a miraculous day The sky won’t give you back And the door lock won’t click… You won’t come back home Won’t come back home You’ll never come back home. But I still feel like…”

Nothing But Thieves — Your Blood

Listen. LISTEN. Your Blood is basically Han Juwon (Daddy Issues Edition): The Song.

“You know it's your blood that I bleed Tell me that there's some way that I'll get through the night. I carry your moral disease I don't wanna be something I'm not to stay alive.”

I literally spent a whole night writing a cheesy twitter thread about Juwon while listening to nothing but this song, even though it’s much more somber than the feeling I was trying to invoke. Because it’s just. So. Juwon. Ugh. Listening to this makes me really want to play some golf. At night. In the rain. You know the feeling.

“Oh no, there's no escape No matter how I try Now I'm stuck on one day For the rest of my life.”

Stephen Sondheim Company OST — Being Alive (by Raúl Esparza)

And this version. THE jwds song, I'm not joking. From Juwon’s POV, because he’s such a miserable flop (I love him so much).

“Someone to hold you too close Someone to hurt you too deep Someone to sit in your chair To ruin your sleep Someone to need you too much Someone to know you too well Someone to pull you up short To put you through hell.”

Even trying to quote it feels silly, because every single line is just IT. Such a powerful, beautiful song, really.

“Make me confused Mock me with praise Let me be used Vary my days.”

I want(ed) to make an edit with this one, too, but I couldn’t even decide on which version to choose… Maybe there's someone more capable than me who'll actually do it one day.

“Somebody crowd me with love Somebody force me to care Somebody let me come through I'll always be there As frightened as you To help us survive Being alive.”

Tamino — Indigo Night

It’s a perfect fit for Juwon, I’m a little insane about it. (Please do not notice that this is my third Juwon association, please do not perceive me.)

“He says, “I, I have seen the world's most beautiful places Still I feel, as If I'm a walking machine Watching it all through a screen There is nothing in between to me This might as well not be real.”

It’s a song about Juwon being his miserable self (though not as self-aware), and Manyang gang teaching him how to finally not be a flop who thinks having no friends is a flex, basically.

“And he cries, “Why can't I sing along with some feeling, or some meaning? It feels like I've always been blind I don't know why you girls are so kind For there are so many in line Whose lives aren't as lost as mine.”

Think of Juwon obsessing over that one stalker photo of Manyang gang gathered at Jaeyi’s, eating and having fun, so full of life and joy. And Juwon being anything but. Until he actually meets Dongsik and the rest and learns how to eat soup with the love of his life staring at him across the table so lovingly. Yeah.

“’Cause he's never been More alive.”

Florence + The Machine — No Choir

Beyond Evil finale from Dongsik’s POV. And post-canon, too. Dongsik and Juwon, Dongsik and his Manyang gang. Just eating well, sleeping well, having people you love around is enough to be happy—and to just be.

“And it's hard to write about being happy 'Cause, the older I get I find that happiness is an extremely uneventful subject. And there will be no grand choirs to sing No chorus could come in About two people sitting doing nothing.”

The song fits with the feeling of the show’s ending so well. It’s so… mellow, yet melancholic, yet light and soothing.

“But I must confess I did it all for myself I gathered you here to hide from some vast unnameable fear But the loneliness never left me I always took it with me But I can put it down in the pleasure of your company.”

To some people the ending was too soft or too open-ended, rather unsatisfying, not dramatic enough. But that’s what made it so perfect in my eyes. The mystery is solved, the chase is over, all that is left is the unspoken words, the smiles, the silent promises, all of the implied in-betweens… The show’s over, practically dead, yet, to me, the characters couldn’t be more alive, continuing on with their quiet lives filled with quiet love. I hope they’re pooping well, too.

“And there will be no grand choirs to sing No chorus will come in No ballad will be written This will be entirely forgotten.”

#beyond evil #(s)pill it out

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badgerstep · 1 year

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the main thing that's deeply unsatisfying to me in this fandom is how many people claim to take such a stance against child abuse and grooming and CSA, but when you look at the art or fic they create about the topic... it's always just about punishing the perpetrator. it's about doing incredible violence to the abuser. it's about hurting someone who hurts a perfect victim.

(more under the cut, obvious trigger warnings for CSA, incest, grooming, etc. this is a serious post about an unpleasant topic and specifically about the way the WC fandom handles it, from my experience as a CSA survivor.)

it's never about healing the victim. it's never about the victim having agency given back to them. it's never about keeping the victim safe. it's never about trying to help them repair their sense of self. the victim's feeling are never considered. the victim is often hardly even a fucking character.

the number of stories and pmvs i've seen about ghost snowfur killing thistleclaw for what he did to spottedpaw where spottedpaw doesn't even speak far outnumber the stories about spottedpaw getting help. spottedpaw isn't even a character in her own fucking story more than half the time.

at the end of the day these stories aren't really about child abuse, are they? they're stories about harming abusers. they're stories about morally justified violence, not putting an end to that violence.

that violence might be cathartic for you. but some of us are abuse victims with no abuser in sight. mine has been dead for twenty years. plenty of others know it happened to them but can't remember who did it. others may not even want their abuser harmed because abusers are, more often than not, family members. (which is another dynamic that gets lost in wc stories about this topic: no one ever, ever wants to bring up incestuous abuse despite it being the most common form of CSA.)

the hard fucking truth is that this is an ugly topic with no clean cuts, no easy answers. it's not a cute little trope to put into your story so you can "do better than the erins." i am far, far less offended by dustfern or bramblesquirrel than i am by yet another fucking self-gratifying pmv about thistleclaw getting killed where spottedpaw is treated as a poor helpless object instead of a real person with real trauma.

the first step to you learning how to talk about child abuse with dignity and respect for others and for really understanding the gravity of the subject is killing the cop in your head and understanding that more violence isn't going to solve the problem of unspeakable sexual violence being done to children. there are other ways. read about them. imagine a better world. empathize with the victim in your story instead of using them as a prop so you get to feel good about killing an abuser. interrogate why abuse happens, the conditions under which it occurs, what allows abuse to continue and perpetuate. ask yourself what accountability looks like.

death is cheap. my abuser is dead. i will never get justice for what happened to me. when you kill the abusers in your stories you deprive the victims of that abuse from getting closure and justice too. remember that. maybe it's cathartic for you, as an author, but it is not that way for all your readers, and it will certainly not be that for your character if you're thinking critically about your work.

#csa tw #incest tw #grooming tw #please kill the cop in your head

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dlea203 · 1 year

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💫🌿

some more asks for u ;)

oh yes, hit me up @coraphoenix 🥰!

💫 - what is your favorite kind of comment/feedback?

I don't have a preference regarding comments/feedback☺️. My heart dances at every comment I get, whether that's a keyboard smash or a very thoughtful analysis🥰.

But I don't accept hate or insults. It's not that I can't deal with criticism, I actually always hope for someone to criticize what I do so I can improve or do better next time. As long as the criticism is constructive, I appreciate it. I appreciate that someone gathered the courage to express what could be done better. But the moment the criticism turns into hate, is expressed with the intention of harming/discouraging/putting me in my place, that's when I don't accept it anymore.

Be kind, people. Choose love and peace. It'll make your world so much brighter and more colorful🥰!

🌿 - how does creating make you feel?

Sometimes it makes me want to cry, ngl😂🥴.

But most of the time, it makes me feel good, at ease, happy🥰. I love the characters I work with (both the ones that aren't mine and my OC's equally) so dearly. I love imagining them in the worlds I build, seeing the scene I wanna write played out in front of my mind's eye. Creating helps me showing other people how I see the world, with what values my parents have raised me and passed onto me etc. I completely understand that those values/morals aren't "the right" ones; that other people see things differently and that's absolutely okay. I like being taught/informed, being made seen a topic from a different angle/perspective. I like discussing something and still ending up with different opinions. It's not about convincing other people to see things your way. It's about trying to make them understand why you see things your way AND trying to see things their way. It's not mandatory to immediately change your perspective because you're looking at it from the other person's angle. You can still keep the same opinion you always had. Just don't expect the other person to change her opinion either.

Alright, enough with my pathetic preaching😅.

Fic writer asks

#fic writer ask game #ask game

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theangelyouknew · 2 years

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So, I want to talk about my weird experience with Harry Potter. Why it’s specifically weird for me to think about the franchise these days.

I’ll start out with JK Rowling is transphobic trash. Get that out of the way.

Ever since these damn books came out, I’ve never been allowed to really experience these books in my own way. Not entirely. Yes, they shaped my teens, but not in the way I think a lot of people see it.

My grandma got me the books against my will for Christmas. I had zero interest in them. My other grandparents were visiting that summer (the summer between 8th and 9th grade) and my stepmom, who wanted to read the books herself? Got mad that I still hadn’t read them. She said she couldn’t read them until I did because they were mine. So I was grounded until I read them.

Again. My other grandparents were visiting from out of state. I was grounded until I read these books. There were 3 of them at the time. I read them as fast as I could. I think it took me like 3 days. I concentrated so hard despite my ADHD that I made myself sick from lack of eating. Cuz I wanted to see my grandparents. Thankfully the books held my interest or it would have been pure torture.

That’s one direction I was pulled into.

That fall, I, who had no friends, was invited to go to a school mate’s church. I had been going for a month or so when they told me Harry Potter is evil. I had to get rid of the books.

I asked my stepmom if I could get rid of the books church didn’t like. When she asked what books, I said “Harry Potter.” She flipped the fuck out. Said if I got rid of them I wouldn’t be allowed to go to church ever again. I had to compromise and put my books in a box under my bed and just not touch them if I really didn’t want to read them.

That’s another direction I was pulled in regards to Harry Potter.

So I have these books in my room making me feel guilty at church. The movie comes out. I have to go see it with the family. The entire time, I’m praying god won’t send me to hell cuz I still got the church in my ear telling me how bad Harry Potter is. My parents get the movie when it’s on idk if it was dvd yet or still vhs honestly by that time, but I remember sitting in the living room to “rewatch” it and just staring out the window bc I can’t enjoy it. Thanks god.

I spent years with her vs the church in my head. Both were wrong. But ultimately the church kicked me out when I turned 18, and I lived with her so it was easy to enjoy it. Besides; i was a huge alan rickman fan so, hell yeah Snape.

So this franchise was shoved down my throat and simultaneously vilified during some of my most life altering years of my life.

I don’t remember what my favorite color was BEFORE Harry Potter. But I can tell you now, it’s green. But if you look at everything I do, i instinctively gravitate towards blues. Blue car. Blue bike. Blue hair (ok that changes often), blue WEDDING DRESS, but if you ask me I always say green. For slytherin. But is green my favorite color? I don’t know. Most people around me assumes it’s blue.

If I had never been forced to read Harry Potter, would I have cared about it? Turned it into part of my personality? Honestly I doubt it. I mean I might have watched the movies eventually, but I wouldn’t have gotten so attached. Cuz it wouldn’t have mattered.

If I hadn’t I’d the church trying to pry it away from me would i feel the way do now? Probably not. It’d just be another book series. I might not have had my stepmom freak out and force it harder down my throat. Idk.

Both these scenarios were WRONG and extreme. And frustrating to think about now. And because JK is trash, with harmful world views, I’m being told once again how to feel about the books and world this garbage queen wrote.

And it wouldn’t be so hard to let go a book series if it wasn’t put on such weird pedestals in my life to begin with. It’s just a book series. It’s not a fucking life style. The story itself not a moral right or wrong. (The author is, don’t give her money fuck her) but at the end of the day the books themselves are dime a dozen at thrift shops and shit.

Also if you have kids and they don’t want to read a book, don’t force it. Holy hell.

#harry potter #anti jkr #I was at cemetery church and zoning out while the father went on and on #cuz I married a catholic but they’re more lenient than my old church #and I still have adhd and I was looking at the colors on the windows #and thinking about how the greens were pretty but the blues were too #and that got me to thinking about my weird relationship with Harry Potter #and I have no idea what the father was talking about at all

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geekns · 4 months

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(you cannot control what others do or do not)

This should go without saying, but apparently it doesn't, so...

Everyone is entitled to their opinion. Even if it's a shitty one. Yes, even then.

If my opinion is different than yours, then it doesn't mean that I hate you. To be fair, it also doesn't mean that you hate me...it depends entirely on how we react.

The question seems to be: what is the adult, rational thing to do when we disagree with someone?

If you can state your viewpoint rationally (and without throwing poo), then go for it. Reblog with your side. Ask if they knew about x information, sure. But be respectful. And realize that not everyone will come to the same conclusion as you even with the same information. And not everyone will fit inside the box that you try to put them in.

Not everything is A vs B. Sometimes there are other viewpoints that you might not have even realized existed.

If you decide to interact, you must realize that the other viewpoint has the right to equal air time. They are not ever obligated to agree with you in any shape or form. If they block you, that's also not an automatic win (or a loss). That's a boundary that you should respect.

If you start trolling, calling names, flaming, making fun of the ones who have a different opinion, leaving snide comments insinuating that their opinion is invalid and/or must be evidence of x negative emotion, or--heaven forbid--telling someone to kill themself! Then you are the one actively engaged in hate. This behavior is not in fact rational or justified. It's just not. It's rude and immature.

Please understand: nothing is ever completely black and white. They probably agree with at least some of your points (shocker, I know). Yes, you will have some opinions in common!

They might even have contradictory info and statistics. Can you be willing to modify your opinion based upon that new info? Can you agree to disagree? Can you see from multiple sides simultaneously? Can you grow?

If you need to live in an echo chamber and have zero interest in IDIC, then block the people who disagree with you. And leave it at that.

Blocking means "leave me alone." It means "I need space, so I'm setting a boundary." It can mean "your argument was stronger than mine." It can also mean "your argument was so weak." It can mean "I don't care."

Always remember that disagreement in a mature debate is not meant as a personal affront in and of itself.

Fuck, in a true debate, the two debaters don't always get to choose which side they are arguing! There may be times that you might not even agree with what you are quoting, that isn't the point. Hiding contradictory information because it disagrees with your conclusion is not a valid tactic. And it's most definitely not about emotion; it's about rhetoric and learning to adapt.

There are people in this world who say shit just to get a reaction out of you, regardless of what they personally think, because they like to watch the drama. (My father is one of these assholes lol.)

Yes, you are entitled to your opinion, and yes your hurt feelings are understandable and natural. That does not make them a license to be a dick. Those strong emotions do not mean that you're a better person or that your points are the only ones that matter. They do not equal moral superiority in any shape or form. Only rational information is truly relevant.

If rational information is making you feel a strong emotion...maybe that's something that you need to think about (calmly) and reassess.

You are allowed to change your opinion. You are allowed to not change your opinion. The same is true for the other party!

People are allowed to reblog other people's content, 100%. People are allowed to ask questions in other blog's inboxes. But again...trolling, name-calling, flaming, taunting, and death threats? Not cool. Ever. It's not "being nice." You don't have the right to "educate" others on anon. It's bullying, plain and simple.

If this is the choice you have made, you have lost the high ground and any appeal to authority because you decided to throw a tantrum.

Don't throw a tantrum. Don't demonize based on fear. Do more research. Make peace with the fact that not everyone thinks the same way. Let it go. Accept diversity. Life will go on.

#discourse #debate #ideology #anti-Anne #free speech

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selormohene · 7 months

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day 101 (thursday, october 12th 2023)

Still working through a backlog, putting this up like eleven days later than the posted date. This one's on moral evaluation and the practice of moral assessment.

There has been a lot of “conversation,” on my TL, if that’s even a plausible word for this, on various world events, and people are sharing their opinions from all sorts of different directions. There’s a lot of stridency, a lot of emotional and moral urgency (and consequent outrage), and so on. It feels like people aren’t listening to each other, and so on. I almost never know what to say on some of these topics, at any rate not unless I also know how to phrase what I think in a way that won’t offend people I know who hold certain views not just on the first-order issues but also on the second-order question of what it says of people if they don’t hold the same views or in the same way. And usually when I'm thinking about or having conversations with people about contentious topics, I’d like (to the extent that is possible of course) not to have to think about the overhead of “well what if someone interprets this in the least charitable way possible” or “what if they think I'm a monster” — I’d like to be able to take seriously other people’s divergent perspectives and have them accommodate mine without it being a matter of moral condemnation.

I think part of the issue is that people often want to say that some things aren’t complicated and there’s always a matter of right and wrong but everything really is complicated especially since part of what informs our moral reasoning is the perspective of our peers whom we’ve thought of as reasonable and so on. Like, if someone whom you know to be even-minded, well-informed, thoughtful, morally serious etc. on some things comes out with a left-field take on another issue, that causes you to stop and reconsider. Of course, people are complex and multifaceted, and so can have meaningful perspectives on one issue but not others, and you don't always have access to the background which is informing their views on a particular issue (to be able to tell whether it's adequately informed etc.). But the fact that certain people tie assessment of a view to assessment of a person who has those views, at least in a categorical way (there are always indirect connections and categorical cases but it's far from a law of nature) makes it difficult for me to engage. Whereas I always prefer to take people who hold certain views as opportunities for moral reasoning, even to the extent that such reasoning might be incredibly fraught. At the same time I do think there are issues on which things are just straightforward, which makes it hard for me to stay with the perspective I'm expressing here because I can see how other people might have the same sense of moral clarity on different issues from me.

But it's hard to know what to believe or what views to express. Like if two people you respect (and who agree on most of the core issues!) are issuing incredible condemnation on particular or specific aspects, what is one to do? One doesn’t want to just figure out what it is that one thinks and stand on it, and one doesn’t want to say “actually it’s more complicated,” and there’s a tension in trying to triangulate one’s moral views with others (which sounds like trying to achieve consensus as opposed to moral truth) and also recognising that part of moral reasoning is not thinking that you must have the truth and so can be closed off to the moral insights of others. This is why I often don’t like to say anything about contentious issues. I'm sure some of it, perhaps a lot of it, is a lack of moral courage, though, which I will admit. I also feel like there’s this sense of being watched and judged, and this is something that I’ve always been sensitive to as someone who faced a lot of ostracism as a child. I sometimes wish I had a lot more to say especially when a lot of the people whose opinions I’m thinking about aren’t that close to me that I should care, or don’t feel similarly inhibited in expressing their own strident opinions. But hone again I think that it partly has to do with the fact that I feel like I’m a lot more tolerant than other people when it comes to certain things, although this itself derives from the same tendency of feeling the need to be accommodating, I suspect. And in particular this isn't something which only shows up when it comes to moral issues, it's a general tendency of mine I feel like.

This ties into the difference between what you might call moral evaluation and the activity of moral assessment. A moral evaluation is essentially assigning numbers or similar values to states of affairs or events. It often involves categorical statements and is a detached matter. To be sure moral evaluation can be as fine-grained and context-sensitive as you like, it's not as though moral evaluation is a matter of saying "X action is wrong" without considering the context in which X action occurs. But the point is that the essential thing is placing the right state of affairs or action or whatever in the right box. In principle if you had access to all the moral facts it's not out of the way to imagine that a computer could morally evaluate a given situation. But the activity of moral assessment is a practice, an essentially personal and interpersonal one, something you engage in with others. The question isn't just placing a valuation on states of affairs. There are many dimensions to the activity. There's moral profession and/or expression, where the primary thing is putting out your own moral views on an issue. Then there's moralising, which is attempting to influence other people on the basis of your moral views (and this can be done in a way which has certain negative aspects as the term "moralising" suggests). You might call the non-pernicious form of this moral suasion. Then there's moral grandstanding, which is like moral expression except that it has as its primary purpose making oneself look good, although even this can have as its ultimate purpose influencing people to act morally, but not by straightforward influence of moral reasons but through inspiring admiration for one's character, or guilt. Then there's interpersonal moral reasoning, where you want to reach agreement with others, and also "thinking out loud" where the point isn't to come to an agreement with others but to come to agreement with oneself, as it were, although like in moral reasoning you still do take other people's moral opinions as input. And I guess that's kind of what I'm doing here, although this is more metaethical as well. And all these are bound up with forms of non-moral or quasi-moral action like politics, collective organising and the exercise of collective pressure, and so on.

And the point is that online (or more generally in the public sphere) all of these activities coalesce in ways that can make it difficult to navigate the moral landscape virtuously. It's almost as though correct moral evaluation and skilled practice of moral assessment as an activity are often in tension. Many of the norms that structure the activity of moral assessment aren't necessarily accuracy in moral evaluation; for instance if you say X is bad, there's a question not just of whether X is indeed bad, but also whether or not people recognise your right to do so given what else you’ve condemned and what it says about you, or what practical effects your saying X is bad might have, etc. Perhaps this is again the difference between the Kantian and Aristotelian approaches that I’ve often emphasised, where the Kantian approach is more about moral evaluation and the Aristotelian is more about properly conducting moral assessment, although of course the Kantian perspective does leave a lot of room for moralistic condemnation as I’m seeing.

(Interestingly it turns out that many people think that the activity of moral assessment, in all its messy practicality, is prior to the possibility of moral evaluation. For instance (and this is something I did know on Thursday, but which would probably not have been nearly as salient to my mind then), it so happens that Richard Rorty has such a view, and so does Raymond Geuss, on which the ability to pass moral judgment has its primary application to the people with whom we're in community and who stand the best chance of listening to us and being influenced by our judgments, and only then extends in an increasingly attenuated way to remote societies or the distant past. It also turns out, which I would have had no way of knowing on the Thursday for which this post was written, that this is a view that Carol Rovane holds, and that something similar is expressed in the Zhuangzi.)

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