Testing out a new program

Hey Zep!

I love your writing, especially been enjoying the Soldier Boy series stuff and the latest with Smoke Eater!

(Btw are you taking inspiration from One Chicago (Fire, PD, Med) with it? If so kudos and I love it, big fans of those series myself 😊)

Anyway! I’ve really been enjoying your works, been pouring through them and the stuff you have on AO3. I also thought your tips for writing were super helpful!

I’m back to writing myself after a long ass break, but always struggle keeping inspiration so a lot of my work sometimes goes unfinished. I’d like to ask how you keep motivated and continue a fic even if sometimes you’re not into it? Do you have any tips or tricks?

Thank you and again, love your work!

Hey there, lovely!! ❤️

Thank you so much! I'm so glad you liked Break Me Down and are enjoying Smoke Eater too! ❤️‍🔥

(Oh yes, indeed I am! 😊 I love all things Law & Order and One Chicago. I based firefighter!Dean on Lt. Matt Casey in Chicago Fire, with a little Severide flair lol.)

Thank you again for reading my work, both here and on Ao3!! I'm also glad that my writing tips have been helpful to you in any way. I came back to Tumblr and writing in general after about a year break myself, so I feel you there.

I absolutely LOVE your question though...

Because it's something I still battle with myself. I think all of us writers and artists struggle to stay motivated, no matter how much we love our craft. I do, however, have a few tips that help me immensely.

5 Tips to Stay Motivated to Write:

Be organized. Create a realistic, attainable schedule. ✍️

My brain works in checklists, bullet points, very methodical. I can't write chapter five before chapter 1. I can't write a series (even a mini series or a long one-shot) without outlining first.

So my first step is creating a schedule for myself: from sketching the premise, to bullet points/outlining, to actually sitting down to draft, to then editing. When I'm working on a series, I write the first 3 to 5 chapters before starting post it.

This means I have a head start. I commit to writing a chapter per week after that until the series is done. This give me lots of time and wiggle room for editing before posting each chapter afterwards. For example, I wrote the first 5 chapters of Smoke Eater before I started to post. I'm now in the middle of drafting Part 19 out of 20 even though I just posted Part 11.

Now, this doesn't mean I don't slack off lol. If I don't follow these steps I lose my discipline. I can get lazy. (We won't talk about And So It Goes. 😅 I've been sitting on writing the last 5 chapters for a painfully long time.)

But I have other tips that help me get my head back into the game.

2. Revisit the thing that gave you inspiration in the first place! 🍿

Rewatch, reread, revisit the episode, movie, book, story, artwork that stroked your muse and had you daydreaming and brainstorming about the WIP you're working on. That can be a good way to revitalize you when you feel your motivation lacking.

3. Create a music playlist. 🎶

I love doing this, especially for a series. I often create a playlist of songs that remind me of the setting, the characters, the romance I'm trying to create. Whether it's the words or the tone/rhythm that get me going, music inspires me greatly.

(For Break Me Down, for example, I listened to songs like "All My Living Time" by Radio Company for the vibe of the plot, and oldies like "If I Didn't Care" and "You're Getting to Be a Habit With Me" by Mel Torme for nostalgic 40s vibes/the romance.)

4. Go for a walk. ☀️

I walk for exercise, but it also gives me time to daydream and run scenes in my head while vibing to my music (sometimes looking like a crazy person as I nod and make hand motions lmao). This helps me clear my head, get some fresh air, then come back to my laptop with a little more pep in my brain, ready to write.

5. Encouragement and feedback from others. 💞

This really helps, of course. Whether it's someone you trust to read over your work, or seeing how people react to your initial chapters after you post them. Both can be very motivating to keep going, at least for me!

And I'll be transparent, I've gotten a bit fatigued while writing the back half of Smoke Eater. I have a lot going on at work and my personal life at the moment. But seeing how people have been commenting and giving feedback on each chapter -- the mystery, the connection between Dean and the reader, the various storylines happening -- it's been incredibly motivating for me to read those back and remember that people are enjoying what I'm coming up with. It helps give me the push I need to get the rough draft out.

And a rough draft doesn't have to be perfect on the first try. That's why it's rough. I call it the "throw up draft." Just get it on the page. The editing process is where I truly find the nuance in the dialogue, refine the plot, exposition, etc.

Anyway. I'm long-winded again, as usual. 😂

I hope this helps you! If you have any other writing questions just let me know. I love talking about this stuff! 💕

Week 10

I finally did another digital drawing, this time using Adobe Fresco on an iPad Air 2. This piece was actually way more relaxing to draw than the last time I tried drawing digitally on Krita using my roommate's touchscreen laptop because nothing was glitching out. Everything worked perfectly this time and the Apple pencil felt very intuitive in my hand. I still struggled to get my line work to look nice and I'm not sure if the process in which I colored and shaded my drawing was the way most people do it but after finishing this piece I walked away wanting to do more digital art which is a victory in itself.

When I walked out of Manga in New York I finally understood the importance of how the presentation of an art piece can add to the overall experience of the audience member. This was a quick sketch I did in Adobe Fresco of how I was planning to display my animation. I'm thinking of getting one of those old TV carts that I would often see in elementary school where it had a big CRT TV that was hooked up to a VCR. The VCR is just for display because I'm not sure how to put my animation onto a VHS tape and even if I did it doesn't really add anything but I was planning on displaying my animation on the CRT TV. The reason the setup is like this is because this is the same setup that the two brain cells have when they are watching Dillon's embarrassing memories. I will also have two bags that will be labeled Embarasing Memories and Good Memories, after the audience member is done watching my animation they will write one happy memory and one embarrassing memory on an index card/cassette tape and throw them into their respective bag. I'm not 100% sold on this idea but it is a good start.

My professor recommended that I watch more animated short films that weren't just from previous alumni to broaden my horizons in terms of storytelling in a short animation and the way animation is used as well as its quality. I saw 10 animated short films but I'll only talk about the ones that stood out to me starting with This Actually Happens A Lot by Tom Law. I remember my professor asked me to explain why I love animation so much and I showed her the transformation sequences from Ben 10 (2005) and I just said "I mean just look at that". But she didn't see the same thing I did and said I needed to look deeper for the reason and I feel this short gave me that answer. Animation makes the unnatural feel natural without needing to explain why it is the way it is. In this short, we see that the male character's social anxiety is causing him to stick from wall to wall and be suspended in thin air. Obviously, this doesn't happen in real life but I didn't question it, I accepted immediately that this is how this world works and because of that I'm more in tune with the author's message instead of fighting the way he presented it, creating a much more enjoyable watch. If this was live-action I would be more interested in how they did the effect rather than what the point of this character being suspended in mid-air is supposed to represent in the first place.

Resilience by Yunie Choi gave me a new perspective on the horrors of war and life after death. They used animation to do a timelapse of a decaying corpse over the course of several hundred years and it is quite beautiful to see how life moves on without you. The use of colors and interesting animal designs really add to the beauty of this animation.

This guy, Manu Mercurial, does a lot of YouTube tutorials for animation but I haven't seen his animated projects in full before. I thought it would be topical for me since we are both interested in the subject of memories. He very much took a very different approach from what I was thinking of doing but I still think it was a good watch to see how people visualize revisiting their old memories

I like Afternoon Class by Osro for the same reason I like This Actually Happens A Lot, I don't question why this kid's head turns into several heavy objects but I have an immediate connection to it because I understand the feeling of trying to stay awake in class. Also, the use of sound effects is excellent in this short.

I put Forget Me Not by The Lonely Star Studio on here because it shows that even with terrible voice acting and mic quality I can still appreciate the animation of this short which has also been a huge stressor.

Bounty by Arrowmi is on here because it has the opposite problem of Forget Me Not it has amazing voice acting but the art style and animation are pretty rough. It's not bad but it's not super pretty to look at either. However, it was still able to tell an intense story of an ex-bounty hunter and suck me into the world despite its noticeable drawbacks.

Going back through my old script ideas, I had this one part where at the climax of the story the main character would wake up in a car sitting next to his dad. He's in shock because his dad is supposed to be dead and yet here he is just driving nonchalantly, the main character knows this is a memory but he decides to ask his dad a bunch of questions to see if his dad would still be proud of him if he were to meet him as an adult. I feel that this entire scene I made was inspired by this Spiderman story I found 2 years ago on Instagram in which Peter gets 5 minutes to talk to Uncle Ben after years of being Spiderman, this story really connected with me when I first found it because what I want the most in life is to just ask my dad "am I doing good". There are a lot of things that I struggle with; not being masculine enough, I'm almost 23 and still haven't had a girlfriend, and I constantly wonder if I picked the right career choice. I don't know if my dad struggled with the same things but I assume that he didn't and I often feel that if he were to meet me as an adult he would be disappointed. I know that most likely he would say that he is proud of me despite all my shortcomings because that is what parents are supposed to do but the fact that I will never get that answer kills me. I decided to read all 3 parts of this story to get a better idea as to what led up to this Uncle Ben interaction and it was pretty good, if you watched Spider-Man 2 it hits the same story beats. Lately, I've been thinking of scrapping the two-brain cell idea and instead animating the car scene I described earlier on its own.

REFLECTION:

I'm really happy that I finally found a groove into digital art and I'm hoping this will finally jumpstart some animation this week. I'm also glad that I watched all those animated short films, they all had their unique quirks and drawbacks that you don't normally get to see in professionally animated TV shows. I also want to explore the idea of being able to talk to a dead relative for a brief period of time before you never see them again.

eurghhghgh this gets a little long but i'm not putting a read more line cuz i put TLDR at the bottom and i want that shown.

i'm starting to think uploading weekly is more difficult than i thought now that i'm trying to also work on other things during the week, i haven't had time to work on any of the companion fics for gom or any of my other projects, and i think GOM is suffering a bit for it [last week i did just basic sketches for the chapter bc i was struggling to get everything done in time]

and that means i also don't really have time to stream if i want to draw while you guys watch, since i stream for a few hours at least [the one i did the other day was about six hr, you can see the highlight reel here, since the vod will eventually be deleted as all vods disappear after like 7 days. i just trimmed off the start and end where i'm talking nonsense and saved that as my highlight reel. sorry about the audio being a bit funky for my mic i'll bring my laptop closer to me next time].

But also the biggest thing [on top of wanting to complete more chapters and make a buffer]: i really want to reread the entirety of Ghost of mine so i can check for errors or inconsistencies, all i could do last week was listen to the tts of 12-16 while trying to get a drawing for 17 prepared, and i couldn't fix all the errors i heard since i was just trying to fix the timeline errors as a minimum before posting the chapter. the extra time would give me more time to proofread Ghost of Mine carefully, as well as give the new chapters and art the attention it deserves. [and...actually take care of my irl self better, it's hard to find time for things like cooking and cleaning beyond what i do for the older man i live with].

So what i'm trying to say is although i didn't think i needed it before, i am changing my mind about it now. so i think it's a good idea for me to upload every two weeks instead of one...at least until i (hopefully) am able to catch up to the point of having stuff prepared ahead of schedule.

i swear on my god awful adhd that i will sit down with my sprint bot [a bot that times me and tracks my word count, not an AI], and write with no distractions at least once a day [unless i have things that i am forced to do and can't get to it, but i can get a lot done when i'm using the sprint bot to make myself focus]. So i will hopefully be making the two week change worth it by getting a lot done and being able to return to weekly updates when things are less cramped and there's stuff prepared properly ahead of time.

I hope that's alright with all of you, cuz i love working on gom it's just a lot for me to get done in a week with everything else i want to do!!

just imagine if i had more time i might be able to start posting TWPT along side gom [it's the jiang cheng lan xichen companionfic for GOM that i haven't had time to write as of late, i have it completely outlined but i just don't have time to write it anymore rn. check it out on the masterpost for my MDZS projects]. or the MXY companionfic as well, which i already started but i can't keep working on because of time as well.

basically there's a lot going on for gom besides the main fic that i haven't been able to get to and it just continues to get further behind in those aspects because i can't get the time for it. so really, i need those two weeks and i'm only just now admitting it to myself that i can't push out updates every two days like i used to and especially not now with these other projects and wanting to branch my stuff out more. There's so much i wanna do! lmao

TLDR; i want to change to bi-monthly updates for GOM so that i can increase my quantity and quality of all projects and future updates properly. I appreciate your amazing patience and i hope to make this change worth it!

i will always update you guys if i make changes like this. i can't leave the changes in your hands completely, but i will continue to upload on sunday since that's the day you guys like! expect the next GOM update on the 23rd instead of the 16th, and every two weeks from the 23rd.

NICHOLAS VINTEREN

oh god i did it. i'm gonna need a shirt that reads; i'm an artist! ask me about my hand! and then on the back, SPOILERS: it hurts.

anyway here is my MC just before it all goes to shit. something something peacock feathers symbolising pride something something the height of pride before a fall—you get me?

BONUS!!!: here is a shitpost i drew as a real insight into how i felt for about 35% of the process.

You don't have to read this if you don't want to. This is my rant and criticism space, it's really more for me. Thanks 7 years of conditioned behavior.

I considered this piece abandoned a few months ago. Just as I was starting the first pass of shading I saw a massive error. I'm pretty vigilant with my layers, keeping copies in case I need to go back and fix something, but I thought I was all done and dusted. Ready for the next stage. So I had no backups. At this point I'm too far in to easily fix it without making a huge mess and it was a massive motivation killer. I couldn't stop thinking about it and I didn't want to continue, so I left it.

Months later I came back, the work I hadn't finished was perfectly fine, I thought it looked good. I decided that I was going to finish the piece even if it killed me even with the mistakes. It happens to all of us. And man I am so happy I continued.

I could've kept going on it to be honest, but I had to put a stop somewhere. There are problems, things I wish I had or hadn't done, but for what it is I'm damn pleased with myself. So I'd say it was a success :)

The last 45 minutes were spent on the background (look too close and I'll kill you). There wasn't even going to be one before then. Glad I stuck out the extra time even though I was fucking exhausted and ready to have my hand completely crushed by a large object.

Around 75% of the way done I notice that my auto-saves are causing my laptop to freeze. I know hefty files can do this but it's only a full body drawing, not what I'd consider hefty. Well it turns out that past me thought so highly of this piece, before it was even a sketch, to have it be in 4K RESOLUTION. That shit is crisp as hell, drink in all that clear detail, so long as Tumblr doesn't nuke it from orbit. (Future me here to say that yep, it got nuked. Guess I'll be the only one who gets to see it in high def, just what I wanted lmao 😒)

It sucks even more because I'm noticing the lack of clarity on another piece I'm doing, but I 1. don't need 4K quality and 2. my laptop can't take that level of a beating every time CSP auto-saves. Yeah I could turn off auto-saves but that feels like just asking for trouble.

Also yeah, I'm doing one for Hebe. It won't be as detailed as this piece because, unfortunately, that ability is on cooldown. Doesn't mean I won't try my hardest regardless, I just fear what might happen to me if I try that again too soon. I don't want another 3 month long shutdown. (As I write this I'm literally at the same point in her piece as I was with this one just before I gave up, lol)

Week 6 SDL: 20 Elements

Bring examples of your collected items scanned, photographed, or drawn (illustrated) to develop a draft. You will need to document objects, scanning elements, etc., before class, so you have options.

Ipad

Photos

Edmonds cook book

Why each element contributes to you as a creative:

Badminton racket/medal: Growing up, sports have always been in my life. I used to play netball, softball, and badminton. Badminton has played a significant role in my life - it has opened up various opportunities for me. I have learnt and gained great insight into different cultures and the community which has really inspired me as a creative.

Candles: I love the calmness they make me feel. I have also delved into making a few candles in the past.

Adidas shoes: I wear these shoes a ton! They have a special meaning to me and I feel that I am expressing myself when I wear these.

Bracelet from grandparents: My grandparents gifted me with a bracelet with my name engraved into it. I still have it with me and it carries so many memories with it.

Letter from my year 13 design teacher: I did design throughout high school, as I felt that I could express myself. In the later years, I really didn't know if what I was creating was good, and was losing passion. My design teacher believed in me and wrote this letter that I have kept ever since, which is one of the reasons I am pursuing design.

English bag: I got this bag in the UK from my grandma who loves fashion. It resembles a little piece of my cultural background.

Rock: When I visit places I like to collect mementos such as rocks. They are so unique in their own way, and each one reminds me of where I've been and how i felt duing that time.

Pencils: I love sketching, I have done it ever since I was little as it is a way for me to just chill out. These are a couple of the pencils I use.

Photograph of great grandma: My English background has definitely had an impact on who I am as a creative person. My great-grandma used to be a nurse in the war period and brought up her 2 daughters on her own. She has really inspired me in that sense.

Lego: I have loved creating with Lego ever since I was little. I found this to be a gateway for me as a creative as I could make whatever I wanted and express.

Karen Walker jewellery box: My friends gifted me with a Karen Walker ring for my birthday, and I have fallen in love with not only the connection to it but also the packaging.

Boney M album cover/record: My grandparents have a record player and we used to play this song all the time, influencing me on music.

Scarf made by grandma: My grandma is quite creative in the sense of knitting, painting and hand-crafting things. Watching her create has definitely impacted how I want to create.

Parkrd tote bag: I collect tote bags. This one in particular is one of my faves as I love music and I love the way it has been made.

Handmade mug: I painted this mug a while back and I still remember the process of how it was crafted which I had found interesting.

Harry styles lanyard: Harry Styles is my fav artist. I have grown up knowing his music for years. His songs have really impactful meanings for me and the community he has created with his fans has been so powerful and seeing all of the diversity, and how people feel comfortable expressing themselves is what has inspired me through my own work.

Laptop: My laptop is what holds the majority of my work and where I spend a lot of my time. It houses all of my skills and knowledge.

Jewellery box my grandma made: My grandma made this jewellery box which I find beautiful.

Darlic: I love movies and series. Doctor Who in particular has got to be one of my favourites as I love how different it is and I remember being so emersed

Handmade art from grandma: My grandma hand made this piece for me when I was born.

A brief history of animation

Animation has come a very long way from the phenakistoscope back in 1832 to the popular 3D animation we know of today.

I really loved the intro to the video specifically the animation and the cinematography used in it together with the background music. I'm guessing that footage is from a 2015 film which I am unfamiliar with.

In 1928 'Steam boat willie' was released. It was created by walt Disney and widely recognized as the first synchronised sound cartoon

A new definition I learned from the video was 'rotoscoping' which is drawing/painting over existing footage. This technique was used in rainbow dance and later in music videos like 'yellow submarine' by the Beatles and kanye west's 'heartless'. I think it was also used in 'the way you are' by bruno mars

Hearing that flintstones theme kick in suddenly made me feel very nostalgic and happy and I still love the song even now. It's funny how it was one of the shows I enjoyed watching as a young child despite it debuting in 1957 way before my time and I had no idea because I was just a naive little boy. In fact a lot of the cartoons and films I watched and enjoyed as a little boy debuted years before I was born but somehow they didn't feel old to me. I thought they were recent and I was surprised when I found out in my recent years but now when I watch them it makes sense because the age shows

Stop motion animation uses tangible characters, sets, props etc. and the illusion of motion is created by changing the position of something slightly, in between single camera shots, putting all those frames together chronologically and playing it through. it is this method of animation that was used to create Alice in 1988 which is implied to be the first stop motion animated film. Aardman is a studio that specialises in stop motion and is responsible for animating the most popular stop motion franchise 'Wallace and gromit' which uses clay/plasticine models like most stop motion animations since it is easy to manipulate for when adjustments need to be made. I dont particularly like stop motion animation but one film I loved that uses this style of animation is 'fantastic mr fox' I was just amazed at how the character models were made. I think the main reason I fell in love with it as opposed to other stop motion films is the fact that the animals looked quite realistic and at the same time still very expressive even though they weren't made from clay or plasticine but instead with a variety of materials that mimicked the texture of those certain things in real life. The fur on the animals looked just like real fur and If I remember correctly they had to apply the fur to the models by hand while making sure it looked natural so it must have taken a very long time. On top of making the models they also had to make the clothes to fit the characters individually and they looked like they were made using real fabric. I loved the film's aesthetics so much that I remember as a preteen drawing a few frames just by pausing it on the laptop at certain points and doing full on drawings not sketches. I wish I still had them but they got lost when my family and I moved house

Nowadays most cartoons are animated using 'toonboom' a software I'm already familiar with. Examples of these is Bob's burgers, Rick and Morty, family guy etc. Its just like cel animation but this time the drawings are done directly on the computer. It is quicker and cheaper than traditional animation and in the video it says 'it doesn't completely loose its detail and charm' but I disagree because when I compare cartoons of today to cartoons I watched during childhood they're much less detailed, realistic and the characters have very simple designs that isn't much of a challenge to draw for someone who really enjoys drawing.