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manjiroro · 3 years

Note

Hii!!! Can I request fluff one-shots for Itadori, Megumi and yuta With a fem s/o who acts like Hanoko-kun from tbhk (toilet bound hanoko-kun)

~Thanks😚

fem s/o who is like hanako-kun

characters: yuji, megumi, yuta

content: fluff, fem reader

hii thank you for requesting~~ ah i wanna apologise if this is ooc because idt i was able to capture hanako’s personality right udhfwue

i apologise for any mistakes and i hope you enjoy~~

the both of you are so cute together

both of you are so cheerful all the time, it's hard not to smile around the both of you

you match well with yuji and rarely do you guys have fights

outings with each other are always so much fun

you'd be the one suggesting what you should do on the date

while yuji will be the one making jokes along the way

i think the only problem with your relationship would be that while yuji is willing to sacrifice his life to save everyone, you only care about the people close to you

so while he's risking his life to save others, you'd be risking your life to save him

and of course, when he fails to do his duty, you wouldn't be able to understand why he's putting in the effort to help people he doesn't know

but you'd still be there to cheer him up

yuji would also do the same when you're feeling upset

he’ll be there to shower you with affection and crack some jokes to get you to smile again

honestly, the both of you will quite literally do anything for each other

yuji thinks you’re adorable in general

“yu~ ji~”

you chimed as burst into his dorm room

“yea?”

he asked but was immediately engulfed by your arms thrown over him

“hm~ nothing, just wanna stay like this with you~”

yuji swore his heart melted from your sweet words

yuji thinks your childishness is the cutest trait about you

you’ve been pouty all day and whenever yuji was starting to get concerned

you’ve been trying to avoid him but he doesn’t know what he did wrong

“babe? are you okay? why’re you being mad?”

you huffed at him before turning to face him

“you’ve been gone the whole day and i didn’t get to see your pretty face”

you pout at him, crossing your arms and turning away

yuji can’t help but to laugh at how cute you were

he immediately brought you into a hug and peppered kisses all over your face to make up for it

yuji will get flustered with your teasing but he wouldn’t be too flustered

so whenever you tease him, he’ll just blush before laughing it off

“wow~ aren’t you handsome, yuji. I don’t think I’ll be able to focus on your date, I’ll just be staring at your pretty face.”

you teased when he came over to pick you up for your date

yuji chuckles sheepishly at you while rubbing the back of his neck

“thanks, but don’t get too distracted, we have lots of fun things to do!”

he chimes while he wraps an arm around your waist

but he does enjoy how easily flustered you get

yuji is someone who will compliment you to no end

and whenever he does, your face heats up and you suddenly grow shy on him

he thinks it’s cute though

so while you’re hiding your burning face from him whether be it by turning away or covering it with your hands

he will laugh and give you a kiss on the top of your head

yuji is madly in love with you and he definitely shows it well <3

m e g u m i

he’s gonna act like you’re the most annoying being in the world

when you show any form of physical affection to him, he’s gonna complain about you and telling you to get off when really he’s enjoying it very much

“megumi~~”

you tackled megumi from behind, arms wrapped around his shoulders

megumi stumbles forwards as he turns behind to look at you

“what do you want?”

“nothing~ just wanna hug my dearest boyfriend.”

he quickly faces the front, he tries to act like he wasn’t at all affected by what you were doing

but from behind, you can see the tips of his ears turning pink

he doesn’t really know that you get flustered easily because he’s not one to initiate anything

but one day, when he went up to hold your hand on a date

he noticed that you slightly tensed up and you had gone quiet all of a sudden

usually, you’d be talking and laughing the entire date

so this was unusual to megumi

“hey, you... okay..?”

“y-yea.. just..”

you stuttered while trying to avoid his gaze

“wait- are you getting shy??”

“S-shut up!”

so when he wants you to stop talking, he’ll give you a quick peck on the cheek

bonus is that you looked adorable when flustered

so to get him back, you’ll make sure to tease him even more

he really can’t stand it

because you seem to tease him in front of everyone

there was a time where you were teasing him while gojo was around the both of you

it was the worst day of his life to say the least

“ngaw megumi~ aren’t you the cutest~”

you cooed at him, you had overheard his conversation with nobara about the things he loved most about you

megumi’s cheeks were tinited with a light pink and he was about to retort when,

“WHAT? WHAT DID HE DO?”

gojo appeared from the corner, fairly amused by whatever that was concerning megumi

gojo couldn’t help but laugh and took photos of megumi being a blushing mess

he really wanted to bury himself in a hole at that moment

megumi is most impressed when you get serious

because he’s so used to seeing you constantly being so carefree, this was a new sight for him

so when he sees you focused on something, he can definitely feel a change in atmosphere

he can’t help but to feel proud of you

he’ll be sure to compliment and take you out on a date to show his love towards you

megumi is gonna be the sweetest when you’re upset

he’s noticed that you’d usually isolate yourself when you’re sad

he’s gonna let you be for a while, giving you your space

but after that, he’ll come to you and bring you into his lap

while he has his arms around you and placing occasional kisses to your temples

he’s also gonna list out the reasons why he loves you and all sorts of affirmations

even if megumi doesn’t show show it, he really loves you and he’s willing to do anything to make you happy <3

y u t a

yuta is super shy around you

yuta gets flustered easily so being with you, he can barely function

with you being affectionate and your constant teasing, this poor boy is constantly red in the face

but then again, your presence is extremely comforting to yuta

because yuta mostly grew up in solitude, he never really got to experience genuine love and affection

he also appreciates your words of encouragement thrown his way

“YUTA!”

he had been gone for a mission for a few weeks and he’s finally back

you tackled him into a hug, he tenses up slightly before calming down and hugging you back

“i heard what happened during the mission, good job! i’m so proud of you~”

you smiled at him, pecking him on the lips

yuta blushed red but still smiled back at you

“thank you darling.”

he does like making you flustered too

it’s sort of like payback and also because you’re so cute

he does it when you least expect it

you’re with yuta, watching the other sorcerers train

“yuta, why aren’t you-”

you were cut off by yuta’s lips pressed against yours

you visibly tensed up and pushed him away

“wha- what was that for?!”

yuta laughed at you, his cheeks were also slightly tinted pink

while you looked at him with wide eyes, hand covering your mouth as you leaned away from him

“it’s payback. okay, got to go train now~”

he chimes before rubbing your head and walking off

leaving you still awe struck with your face burning

he never hears the end of your teasing

you really can’t help yourself, he looks so cute with his red cheeks and trying to hide behind his hands

so there he was, walking beside you, he kept glancing at your hands and was debating if he should hold your hand or not

he kept brushing his hand against yours to give you a hint

“yuta, darling, do you want to hold my hand? aw aren’t you adorable~”

you went ahead to lace your fingers with him which made him go red and avert your gaze

yuta knows when you’re upset

even if you’re constantly having a smile on your face, he can always tell when you’re feeling off

so while you’re locked in your room feeling all gloomy

he will knock on your door and patiently wait for you to let him in

even if it’ll take a few hours, he’ll wait for you

and when you finally open the door, he’ll bring you into his arms

cradling you and telling you to take your time to open up to him

in the meantime, the both of you would be comfortable in silence

while you lean your head into his chest and he rests his chin on your head, stroking your back

it’s obvious that you mean a lot to yuta even if he’s still quite shy about it, he truly cares about you and cherishes you <3

❥ masterlist

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blps · 3 years

Text

Are you having fun?

Pairing: Sakusa x reader

Genre: fluff! (And maybe also stranger to why am I stuck with you to oh nevermind I guess you are nice to hang out with to oh shit I think I caught feelings) anybody got a name for that trope??

Word count: ~2.6k

Summary: Your friend’s crush has four tickets to an amusment park, and so while your friend and her crush pratically abandons you with the none other than Sakusa Kiyomi

a/n: Wow thos is my longest fic, I think Sakusa is a bit ooc in this because of how fast he warms up to you but THIS IS FICTION SO WHO CARES haha ok anyways enjoy!

///////////////////////////////////////

You couldn’t believe you agreed to this. Currently in a car, hearing your friend besides you thanking you for tagging along and rambling about her perfect crush, you looked outside the window, thinking about how comfortable your bed was and how you wished you could have stayed in it.

But of course you had to agree to your friend’s offer. The pleading in their eyes made you feel guilty if you said no. She really liked him and you were pretty sure he did too. The both of them were just too shy to initiate the first move. So what could go wrong? Well the fact that you were going to arrive at 8am on a saturday morning was the problem.

And so with your little sleep hours you had, you encourage yourself to do this and make sure that your friend and her crush end up confessing by the end of the day.

One of your worries was the fourth person. Your friend informed you that you wouldn’t be third wheeling, another person would accompany you, wasn’t that wonderful? No. Doing first interactions with a new human being was nonexistent on your list of favourite things to do. Will you and them click off and could enjoy a day together? Or will it be awkward the whole time? What if you both will not get along? So many questions you weren’t so eager to find the answer.

Your friend parked the car, giving you a blinding smile as she got out of the car. You wanted to at least not ruin her first date so you switched your moody morning self to the ‘I totally want to socialise with you’ persona.

As you got out of the car, the sun warmed your skin from the fresh breeze of mornings. You walked behind your friend as you met with what would be the crush and your companion for the rest of the day.

Your partner for the day turned around, and you were just in awe of his beauty. He was tall, more than 6’. His dark hair curled nicely, perfectly framing his face. Well, the partial part you could see anyway as he was wearing a mask. But if that mask didn’t further accentuate his beauty then you didn’t know what else will. As you got closer, two beauty marks were more noticable and that was the last straw. He just took the prize for the most beautiful man effortlessly; it almost made you angry.

He introduced himself with the most soothing voice. You gathered yourself, not wanting to make him uncomfortable as you greeted him properly and his friend. The four of you then entered the amusement park, ready for a day of ups and downs.

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

You knew it would end up like this. As soon as your friend and her crush had a map of the place, they immediately left you and Sakusa alone.

It was silent between the two of you. Guess he wasn’t that much of a talker. You took a map for yourself. You were about to ask what he would like to do when his words cut the silence first.

“I’m not riding any roller coasters.”

Well, that was a really good start.

“May I ask why? Who would come to an amusement park and not try at least one rollercoaster?”, you replied.

“I hate germs and if you were aware, the seats are filled with strangers filth”, his eyes clearly judging you,” I’m sure you wouldn’t understand.”

Oh yeah his looks wouldn’t be able to save him now.

“Excuse me? Are you calling me unsanitary?”

“Considering how you touched the rotating metal bars with your bare hands at the entrance, I would agree. Do you even realise how many germs you just touched?”

His look of distaste was the only confirmation that he was in fact, a germaphobe. Great. Who would’ve guessed a germaphobe would be in an amusement park. You really hit the target for the least desirable person to spend a whole day with in your situation.

You sigh as you took your hand sanitiser from your bag and rubbed your hands vigorously, giving him the most infuriating glare you could do.

“Here”, you showed your hands to him,” there now should be 0.01% bacteria, if you don’t want to ride a rollercoaster, fine. At least let’s walk around and look for our friends since you wouldn’t gain more bacteria.”

You turned around, ready to do anything but be alone with the judging look all day. You should at least have a good time when you were forced out of your comfy bed to be here.

With your back turned to him and his face mask on, you wouldn’t have known of that tiny smirk on Sakusa’s lips.

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Your plan didn’t go as well as you expected. You and Mr. Nofun were sitting as far away as you could from a bench. You were even surprised that he sat on it. Your friend ran along with your crush to who knows where and so you weren’t able to find her.

Silence once again ruled in the atmosphere. Only the faint sound of rollercoasters and people screaming were reaching your ears. You have texted your friend to meet up, you couldn’t handle being alone with him anytime longer. Maybe you should leave him. Why should you stay? You were fully capable of having a good time by yourself.

“I didn’t expect you to have a hand sanitizer with you.”

This was not the time.

“Why did you even come if you weren’t going to do anything? There really weren’t any more suitable candidates?”

You were both staring each other down, arguments ready to be unleashed when a new sound reached both of your ears.

The great rumbling of hungry stomachs.

Yours to be more precise.

Burying yourself deep in the ground was a very enticing idea right now, until Sakusa’s stomach joined in on the symphony of hunger.

With few words of agreement, you both went to find something to eat.

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

You were both eating, in silence once again. Sakusa finished his bite, and stared at you until your own eyes met his.

“No there weren’t any suitable candidates. No one wanted to spend a day with two lovers at an amusement park. And since I thought I would be alone, I planned to do nothing. I didn’t know you would be here.”

Your temper from earlier calmed down, you finished your bite as you answered back:

“Well fair enough but I still would like to enjoy myself you know? You're not the only one that is forced to be here. I didn’t even get to finnish my dream and next thing I know, I’m out of bed and onto one of the most social places you could be.”

Since his mask was off his face so he could eat, which was both a blessing and a curse, you were able to notice the small smirk forming.

“Well how about you do what you would like? Don’t bother about the others, enjoy your day.”

Well, maybe he wouldn’t be a pain after all.

“You have something stuck between your teeth.”

You spoke too soon.

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Aside from his comments, it was actually going pretty well. You had participated in some mini activities and won some prizes. You had gained stuffed animals, a balloon, and more unnecessary gadgets. You wanted to at least try the haunted house but Sakusa refused to go in it.

You were currently in a ferris wheel for a little break, devouring a pink cotton candy while your now tolerable partner was doing his best in trying not to touch the metal security bar.

You let out a chuckle, the both of you arriving at the top.

“I’ll let you use my hand sanitizer. Just hold it if you want to feel secure”, your soft chuckle making his eyebrows furrow.

“It doesn’t work that way”

“Here take this”, you handed him your cotton candy as you searched your bag for your gloves,” here I had these gloves since we would stay to watch the fireworks and it would be pretty chilly at night.”

His eyes reflected surprise as you took your cotton candy back and handed him the gloves. You continued admiring the view and eating the sugar, oblivious to the man besides you who wanted to calm his heartbeat and the pink blossoming coloring his cheeks.

When you were back on the ground and walking around. You spotted one of your favourite activities yet so far. The prize was a living fish and you were just so excited to win one you grabbed Sakusa’s sleeve and dragged him eagerly to the stand.

Time flew by as well as your money. Your wallet couldn’t withstand another round. You just couldn’t beat the game and win the fish. Adding on to that, you felt Sakusa’s annoyance from your back facing him. He was probably tired of holding your stuff.

You accepted your defeat, ready to go, until you felt his presence besides you. His arm extended, cash on his hand.

“Another round please.” The host prepared the booth once again, happy with his earnings. Meanwhile, you prepared to not disappoint Sakusa, mentally forcing yourself to not screw this up. You looked over him, about to thank him. However, he only gave you your stuff back.

“You are so bad at this, let me just show you how it’s done”, his gentle eyes were locked with your surprised ones. It was different from the usual judgemental and disgusted look he had.

Before you knew it, he was facing you again, but this time, he held a plastic bag with a bright small orange fish swimming around.

“Shall we continue, the others are probably searching for us as well.” He kept on walking, not bothering to check if you were following him. Snapping out of your shocked state, you quickly catched up to him, thinking how to thank him.

“Um.. thanks, for winning the fish for me, I-“

“Oh I think you misunderstood,” he smirked, giving you a teasing look, “I won this fish. So I will be keeping it.”

Irritation washed over you. But before you could respond, your name was called out in the crowd. You saw your friend jogging towards you, hand in hand with her crush. At least this day was going well for one of you.

“I’m so glad we found you! We went to the randez-vous point you sent by text but you weren’t there-” She hugged you tight before whispering in your ear, “I’m sorry I didn’t see the text sooner,” before pulling away.

“We were going to our last roller coaster, if you guys want to join us. It’s getting dark anyways, better not be separated again.”

You glanced over at Sakusa, wondering if he was ok doing at least one. He reluctantly agreed, but made an effort nonetheless.

You were walking with your friend, a little behind the others so your conversation wouldn’t be heard.

“I hope you are at least enjoying yourself”, your friend looked at you with concerned eyes, waiting and searching for signs that you would like to leave, “I had a really good time so I wouldn’t mind if you would like to leave, I can drive you home.” You knew that if you felt uncomfortable in any way, she wouldn’t hesitate to take you home safely. However, you didn’t need to go home yet, you could continue a bit.

You considered it. You really did. What was keeping you from leaving? Even if Sakusa was a pain, you somewhat enjoyed his company. No. That couldn’t be it. It must be something else. You convinced yourself that it must be the fireworks.

Ignoring your feelings, you reassured your friend that you were fine. You would enjoy the rest of the day for yourself, not letting anything, or anyone for that matter, to ruin it.

The four of you finally arrived at your final destination. Turns out that no feelings will be ignored. The roller coaster was a lover's tunnel. Guess who’s your partner.

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

It was awkward. You and Sakusa were side by side on the swan shaped boat, not a word travelled between the two of you.

You were alone in the tunnel, the smooth warm lighting meant for couples not helping. If the situation couldn’t get more embarrassing, romantic music started to play and the both of you went stiff.

That was it. Better bicker about something else than being silent. Your heart beated frantically against your chest, a miracle it hasn’t bolted out and left you. You turned your face to face Sakusa, noticing the faint pink on his ears.

“So will you keep the fish?” You shouldn’t have talked, maybe it made matters worse. In this situation, perhaps it was better to keep silent and never speak of it again. But even if that was the case, you shouldn’t make a big deal out of it right?

You were certain you held no feelings for Sakusa. He was mean, teasing, insufferable, never having fun, a germ freak and handsome. Wait no, none of that attractiveness, when someone has an undesirable personality, they appear uglier. But was he really that unattractive or were you trying to convince yourself that even the idea of liking him was impossible.

“I won it. Of course I’ll keep it”, he mumbled behind his mask. The atmosphere was falling once again in silence, besides the music playing.

You dug into your mind to find a new conversation. Or not. Maybe it was his way of wanting zero conversation. You hated this. Your mind was in total chaos and your heart was not stopping anytime soon, it only seemed to increase.

“I haven’t yet chosen a name though. If you want to help that is,” he was still averting his eyes, not completely facing your direction.

The rest of the ride continued with various propositions of names for the fish. And every single one of them ended either with a flat out ‘no’ or a mocking comment.

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

The sun was already setting, the night sky was ruling above as you sat besides Sakusa and your friend. You were waiting for the fireworks to begin, the final activity of the day. Finally this day seemed to stretch out forever. You were almost at your limit, the hours of sleep you skipped catching up on you.

Even at that, you couldn’t ignore that little sting in your heart at the realisation that this was probably the last day you would spend with Sakusa. He wasn’t the perfect choice, but he stayed by your side and let you have fun. The teasing was a bit annoying, but you enjoyed the insignificant bicker. Maybe if you had more time would you warm up to him. You wanted to continue spending time with him.

Your doubts were invading your mind. Perhaps Sakusa didn’t want to see you again. After all he was mean to you from the start. Did he enjoy your company? He did follow your lead all day. If he didn’t like you, wouldn’t he just go his seperate way?

“Did you have fun?” His question surprised you. You were captivated by his eyes. They didn’t hold the usual teasing look he gave you. You couldn’t quite decipher it, but they held something different this time. But you agreed. You did have fun today.

You knew he was smiling behind his mask. He looked like he wanted to say something,but your moment was interrupted by the loud noises in the sky.

In all but a few moments, Sakusa felt a weight drop on his shoulder. He stiffened, glancing down at your sleeping form. He was surprised you could sleep with all that noise. Your features were peaceful with the colored light illuminating your face.

He let you sleep, not wanting to disrupt your slumber. He had to admit to himself, he did have fun today too.

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

You woke up in your bed, your mind still urging you to continue to sleep. However you were distracted by the text you received from an unknown number. An image attached to it of an aquarium and a familiar looking fish in it.

Unknown number

We still haven’t found a name

////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

a/n: Thank you so much for reading until the end!

#haikyuu x reader #sakusa x reader #sakusa fluff #haikyuu fluff

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elspethc22 · 3 years

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Sciles breakup S5

So... I ended up down a rabbit hole of really old comments and arguments over on Archive of our Own yesterday over the Sciles breakup in season 5A. Basically, someone posted a story back when it first aired that was three sentences (stiles apologising to Scott and Scott saying ok) and then detailed in the author’s note how Stiles was completely in the wrong in this situation and Scott has nothing to apologise for. Wow, the comment section was INSANE!!! like people just went off on one another over this and who was right and who was wrong - some were in full agreement with the author, some absolutely on the other side and then those in the middle who thought both boys were in the wrong in different ways.

So, of course, I spent the rest of the day and night thinking about this and what my opinion is. Here it is, for anyone who might care!

More than one of the comments (from the og author and others) were about how the whole series of events leading up to the fight were ooc, like Stiles covering up a murder (I disagree with this because a - not a murder and b - he didn’t cover it up per se, he left yes, but he called the police, Parrish just happened to get to the body first and Stiles didn’t know this so for all he knew Donovan could have survived and left) and not telling Scott, and that Stiles never actually corrects Scott or tells him exactly what happened (apparently him saying ‘I had no choice’ to Scott isn’t him claiming self-defence which I mean, obviously in court he’d need to say the words but in this context it kinda is) so of course Scott just goes with Theo’s version of events (which honestly doesn’t make sense to me, like Scott would just automatically believe Theo that Stiles was capable of cold blooded murder??).

Anyway!! I was thinking about the whole it was ooc for Stiles and they didn’t like the writing for S5 and a lot of stuff didn’t make sense. And that got me thinking about a lot of things in that season that were ooc, or more I guess like extreme versions of their characters? Like Scott trusting Theo so easily and thinking the worst in Stiles - and then I was thinking about their talk a couple episodes later when they go to get Kira and they say they wish they had stayed 5 more minutes and one of them says that Theo didn’t want them to. So... after ALL that... here’s my theory, for what it’s worth....

So, we all know that the Dread Doctor’s got to Kira right, and messed with her and triggered the darker side of her fox? But what if they got to ALL of them and messed with their minds? We know they can change people’s memories, make people forget them - hell, Valack wrote a book to try and remember them then apparently went off the rails, drilled a hole in his own head and got locked up at Eichen House.

Think about it - Stiles knows what he did was self-defence, even if he wanted Donovan dead in that moment. He had a massive bite mark from being attacked and Donovan had made threats against his dad in public so logically he should have known people would believe him, even with his normal overthinking and anxiety. And then when Theo ‘saves him’ from Josh he agrees to cover that up and go along with Theo when he’s spent all season so far not trusting him?

Scott’s asthmas starts up again and NO ONE thinks its weird! Scott knows his asthma disappeared when he got bitten, and that werewolves can’t get sick etc (it also cured Erica’s epilepsy) but then something triggers and attack, Theo is right there with an inhaler and suddenly he’s relying on it all the time. We know the inhaler had wolfsbane, but something triggered the original need for it. And for some reason, no one ever questioned why he suddenly needed the inhaler again which is not right. Scott never questions it, his mum, Lydia, no one!

Malia hiding everything about looking for her mum from everyone? I mean, she’s never normally shy about her willingness to hurt others if she needs to, or her survival instincts. So it does also surprise me that she would go to such lengths to hide the fact she’s still looking for her birth mother from everyone, even Stiles who never looked at her like a monster. Obviously she might have thought they’d try to stop her, but it’s weird for her to have got so secretive all of a sudden and also her sudden trust of Theo, she’s not a very trusting sort.

Even Liam - I know they blamed the supermoon on his rage induced attack on Scott, but even with that I think it was a little out of the blue for him to turn on Scott so suddenly but again, if the Dread Doctor’s were messing with him that would explain why he was so much more susceptible to the supermoon and then Theo there making suggestions about saving Hayden even when she was clearly too far gone.

Then there’s Theo - no one questions how he always manages to find the right answer (except Stiles) like the book. How he just happened to turn up at the same time as the Doctors. Like everyone else, after some initial hesitation, just accepts him and the information he brings them. but then also, I wonder - it’s implied that he was always evil (he helped kill his sister to get her heart) but was he actually born a sociopath? Or was that the Dread Doctor’s too? If his sister was the only one who loved him growing up, and the only one he loved, he would have been open to manipulation. Also this could explain why when he comes back in season 6 he’s eventually more caring and is even eventually able to take someone’s pain - they credit his time in ‘hell’ and his sister’s spirit but what if it was also just finally being away from the dread doctors after so long?

Anyway, many of you may disagree with me, but there’s my long-winded theory of why season 5 was so messed up and ultimately why our amazing Sciles had that horrible breakup scene and why it was so heartbreaking.

(I also chose to ignore all the other arguments in the comments about which boy is a better friend and a better character. I love Stiles, he is my favourite but they both have faults, they both have their moments of not being great friends to each other but they’re also teenagers, and human! no one is a perfect friend)

#sciles #teen wolf #scilesbreakup #teen wolf season 5 #scilesfight #scott and stiles

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imaginarypeteel · 4 years

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Dear Blue: Kurt Wagner x F! Reader

Your mutation: You have f/c hair and can control people when singing

A/n: This is my first one, just something that's stayed in my mind for awhile. Also, it's been a while since I saw X-Men's movies and I haven't been able to read the comics, so I'm sorry that it's kinda OOC. Also, the song lyrics are improvised by me. I also don't remember if the X-Men were known by mutants but here they are. I also apologize for any mistakes with any products.

Word count: 5k

Gender: Fluff

Warnings: Cursing

Jubilee wanted to watch an interview with her favorite artist - Y/n L/n. Appereantly she made songs for mutants. Jubilee had also made them watch it when they had shown little to no care about the said singer.

"So, Y/n, a question that has been lurking in everyone's mind. What do you really think about mutants?" asked the interviewer. Jubilee's breath hitched.

Y/n gave her interviewer a small smile. "Exactly what I've said every other time it's been asked. I think they're misunderstood. Not everyone is the same. When you walk past a human, you don't scream and run, you just walk past them. But for all you know, maybe this human you just walked past is a psychopath who has killed fifteen plus people. But then you walk past a mutant and most of you will scream and run and maybe even call them monsters. But maybe this mutant you just called a monster saved a kitten and risked their life in the process. You don't know who they are as a person when you walk past them."

"Yes, that she is but other people there might not be as open minded," Jean explained her boyfriend's words softly.

After the interviewer had asked some more questions, the show had ended and a break game, Jubilee jumped up. "See? She's awesome! And she protects us!" the girl gushed.

The other mutants exchanged uncertain glances but shrugged and nodded, "I guess?" Jean said uncertainly.

"Yes! I knew you'd like her which is exactly why I got all of us tickets for her concert that is going to be in New York," Jubilee chirped, showing the tickets.

All of their eyes widened and Kurt filled with slight panic. "What the hell? How do you plan on getting us in? No offence but I don't think we can hide Blue boy over here when we go," Scott growled.

Kurt moved a bit uncomfortably.

Jubilee rolled her eyes, "Hello, where you even listening to what Y/n said? She is completely fine with mutants."

In the end, Kurt had went with the coat and hat since he didn't know what the inside of the giant concert house looked like. Surprisingly, the guards let him in.

Jubilee was quiet for a moment but then she smiled brightly. "But what if he teleports inside? Or maybe wears a coat and a hat?"

~~~

Jubilee was giddily waiting for the show to start, different colored glow rings wrapped around different parts of her body. They had seen a few other mutants with visible mutations like a teenage girl with cat eyes and tail and even some fur and a man who looked a bit like a fairy.

"Why did we agree to this again?" Scott groaned, earning a smack from Jean.

All of a sudden, all the lights turned off. Kurt looked around, he had never been to a concert and he thought that maybe the lights had died. "Oh my gosh, it's starting!" Jubilee squealed.

"Vhat do you mean, zhe li-" Kurt started but cut off as a popping sound came and most of the lights pointed to a girl in the middle of the huge stage with colorful and sparkly clothes. Other lights were running along the stage and some going through the crowd.

The catchy and loud music started and Kurt swore his heart started beating to every single beat. It was bizzare but he swore that's how it was.

"Hello New York! How are you this fine night?" the girl - Y/n - asked loudly into the microphone. There was chorus of screams of 'good' that made Kurt's ears ring. "Good 'cause I'm doing awesome too now that I'm with you," the star replied with a huge smile in her voice. "Now what do you say we get this party started?" Y/n asked. Once again, a chorus of screams 'yes' and Kurt cringed at it again.

"I fear what you think of me once you realize that I'm not like you."

"Will you think of me as a monster or not, as a monster or not?"

Were the first lyrics. Maybe this won't be as bad as I thought.

Kurt felt these lyricys hit him a bit close to heart.

"But I hope you won't because I'm not. I'm just scared. Just really really scared."

The concert had gone horribly wrong. Halfway through and mutant hunters had opened fire. Screams had filled the humongous room and people were trampling over each other.

Kurt had found himself liking the concert much much more than he thought he would. Like that much more that he was dancing. Same with the others, Jubilee and Jean already singing the lyrics off key with Y/n and the crowd.

~~~~

Thankfully Kurt had teleported them out of the place, they were now outside and were about to run towards the X-Jet when hunters jumped in front of them, guns pointed at them. They debated if they should fight or just let Kurt teleport them away when:

"Don't hurt, just leave, just leave, just leave. No one hurt, no one hurt, no one hurt. Just leave."

The hunters froze before lowering their weapons and simply walking away. The X-Men turned their heads towards the source of the voice when a familiar f/c haired popstar jumped out of the shadows, still all colorful and glittery. "Okay! This won't last for long! Let's go!" she rushed them, her e/c eyes quickly snapping between the X-Men and the hunters. Said mutants were a bit... stunned. "Well?!" the popstar cried out desperately.

"Uhm, Kurt, would you teleport us to the X-Jet?" Jean mumbled. They all grabbed onto the blue mutant when Y/n exclaimed, "Waaait! Can I come with you? My driver took off when this started and my place is... not close enough for me to get away from the hunters on foot."

The friends exchanged looks but nodded. Y/n sighed with relief before jumping onto Kurt's arm, making the said boy flush violet.

With a bamf, they were on the X-Jet, Y/n still tightly clinging onto the teleporter's arm. "Woah! That's so cool!" she chirped with excitement, looking around, unknowingly hooking her arm around the German mutant's elbow, making him even more violet.

"O. M. G! Y/n L/n is a mutant! And she's here! On our X-Jet!!!" Jubilee chirped, earning the popstar's attention a shy smile forming on her face.

"I guess I am... Wait... X-Jet? Does that mean..." The f/c haired girl trailed off before letting out a gasp. She finally let go of Kurt to gather her hands around her mouth as she squealed some muffled words into it. "You're the X-Men, aren't you?"

They exchanged looks and nodded.

"Wow! I can't believe this is happening!" Y/n bounced a 360°. She then tucked a stray piece of her dyed hair behind her ear shyly. "Oh my gosh, I have dreamed for this day. I'm Y/n... You already knew that, 'cause you were at my concert." She stayed quiet for a bit before her e/c colored eyes widened. "The X-Men were at my concert!" she exclaimed. "Holy-"

Two minutes into the flight of Jubilee asking her favorite star all sorts of questions, Y/n opened her mouth to request something. "So, can we stop by my place? I'm not sure if I want to get any more glitter over this thing."

"Not to be rude but we should get going," Ororo interfered.

The popstar blushed like a boiled lobster and nodded while smiling shyly at the floor. She hesitantly sat on a seat that no one took which just so happened to be beside the Nightcrawler.

Ororo, Jean and Scott had a silent conversation between themselves before Jean asked: "Depends, where's your Place?" Y/n grinned before giving her address, it was a bit off route for their path back to the X-Mansion but not too far, so they decided to go there.

~~~

Kurt wasn't sure what he was expecting. A rotten cottage in the middle of the woods? Not Really. An apartment in the city? Maybe. A private nice house? Yes. But not a freaking mansion that challenged the place they lived at.

"You live here alone?!" Peter gasped making the star chuckle.

"No, my parents, a few mutants who are taking cover there and my pig, Cookie also lives there."

Jean rose a brow, "You have a pig?"

Jubilee squealed in her seat, "O. M. G! Yes! Cookie is the cutest!!!"

About fifteen minutes later, a familiar figure was hopping towards them through the woods, clutching three bags. She also had different clothes and a small figure was running after her.

They decided to land hundred feet away from her gates. Y/n started to head off the X-Jet but then she stopped. "By the way what are your names? Only Jubilee told me hers," she chuckled. They all told her their names, Kurt earning a warm smile from the e/c orbed mutant before she bounced off towards her own mansion. She had decided to join the school to focus a bit on her abilities.

"So, Y/n," Ororo started, earning the giddy mutant's immediate attention. "Can you explain your mutation a bit better to us?" the white-haired woman asked.

Y/n smiled awkwardly, "Well I uh, I can control people's minds with what I sing. But it's a limited amount of people and after like um, 3 minutes it wears off and usually they remember that i controlled them. So uh yeah, almost every hunter in New York should know by now that I'm a mutant. If not everyone that is," she mumbled sadly. "Oh! And my hair colour, it's not dyed, it actually is that colour."

~~~

"Oh my gosh that's Cookie!" Jubilee exclaimed, her eyes shining brighter than ever.

"You are not taking that pig with you," Scott grunted as soon as Y/n stepped inside.

Her and Jubilee let out devastated gasps. "What?!" they exclaimed.

Cookie trotted between the seats, sniffing them like a bloodhound, occasionally letting out oinks. He then stopped beside Kurt as he sniffed his spaded tail, his snout and breath tickled it which made Kurt pull his tail back, up to his lap. Cookie didn't seem to like it, because the next moment, the small pig was on the blue mutant's lap.

~~~

"Awww!" Y/n was now leaning against Kurt's chair, making him turn from blue to violet once again. "Look! He already accepted Kurt, why not take him?" the singer argued with Scott.

"He's going to be roasted for dinner if you take him there, pets are not allowed," Cyclops huffed.

"Then they'll have to face me," the f/c haired girl said darkly, dumping her bags in the back, walking over to her previous seat and plopping down there.

"And me! And you know I don't control my powers," Jubilee said. The others made uncomfortable faces but let it go.

"Cookie, did you replace me with Kurt so quickly?" Y/n cried as they were walking towards Professor X's office. It was late... or early. However you would like to take 4am.

The singer waited for a response which was just Cookie running an inch away from the blue boy's strange feet. "I don't blame you, he's cute," Y/n shrugged. Kurt's amber eyes grew to the size of watermelons at the compliment. Cute? No one has ever called me cute. And for the uncountable number of time, she had made him blush once again.

~~~***~~~

Your pig came to you oinking, begging for food. You grabbed another white bread, turning around and connecting your eyes with your small pink friend. "Sit," you had chirped, two seconds after, the dots connected in his little brain and he sat down. You bent down and gave him the bread. Immediately, he started to chew on it loudly. You were used to the noise of his chewing but obviously, some weren't. Half of the people cringed at the sound while others awwed.

When you had entered the dining room in the morning, quite many of the students had choked on their drinks or foods or had spurted it out. "Is that Y/n really walking around the X-Mansion or am I still dreaming?" someone choked, earning a pat on the back from you.

"Are you okay?" you asked with concern.

"yes," they squeaked, earning a smile from you before you trotted to an empty space, once again beside Kurt.

Cookie soon came running down the stairs. Surprisingly, Professor X had let him stay after you had plead and howled on why you need him here. "Is that Cookie?!" a girl gasped, you hummed as confirmation as you rubbed some jam onto your white bread.

After he had eaten the bread and you had completely ignored him on giving another, he had decided to try and swoon Kurt. "Damn, he really likes you. Can't say he is the only one," you smiled, still eating your breakfast. Kurt didn't know how to take that statement. Did you like him as someone you tolerated or something more? No, the latter was nonsense, you had been in the X-Mansion for less than twenty-four hours, plus he looked strange and you hadn't even had a full conversation with him. You probably just meant it as a joke because of how keen on him Cookie was already. You were probably going to ignore him soon anyway.

~~~

A month had passed and anyone saying you were ignoring him would be the biggest liar in Earth's history. After the first week, you were clinging onto him like a koala baby to its mother. It made him shy while you were anything but. You asked him all sorts of strange questions. For example: "If you could be any planet in our solar system, who would you be?" and "Birch or maple tree?"

They had him very confused but he answered them anyway, after sometime, he was comfortable with you though and he thought that maybe that was the point of the strange questions. Something you also did was flirt with him shamelessly from time to time. You just got into that mood sometimes and at those times, you were usually hooked to his elbow with your own and occasionally leaning your head against his arm or shoulder. Now that was what made him shy, awkward and nervous.

~~~

"Kurt," you purred at him, throwing your arms around his shoulders as you headed towards the danger room. Professor X had seen potential in you and now you were training to become an X-Man. You had chosen on the first day to use Siren as your alias.

That fact had awakened Kurt's insecurities that had basically disappeared. You were a worldwide known singer who humans actually liked and you had probably dated lots of normal looking guys and maybe even girls. While he looked anything but normal, elf ears, amber eyes, serious lack of fingers and toes, a tail, fangs and most importantly blue skin. Your only visible mutation was your f/c hair and that was easily covered by two words: hair dye.

You were in your flirt mood again, Kurt gulped at that, "Uhm, hi Y/n."

You squealed at his reply and squeezed him tightly, "Aaah, you're so cute!" Your f/c haired self gushed as you leaned your head on his bicep, Still Walking so you made the two of you sway from side to side slightly. Kurt's tail nervously twitched. He knew a small crush for you had bloomed in him. He would've thought that maybe you liked him too but you often would be flirty with the other boys and sometimes with even Ororo and Jubilee.

Eventually you sighed before squeezing him tightly. "I would wish that you would know how amazing you really are," you said, your voice muffled since your face was buried into his side. He smiled at your words. "Zankz, Y/n."

"Hey Kurtie, if you could wish for one thing from a genie, what would it be?" You asked with interest.

Kurt bitterly replied, "That I could look normal."

His response made you jerk away from him, eyes wide. "What?! Don't you know how amazing you look?" The male mutant shrugged at that, you stared at him for ten seconds, trying to figure out if he was lying or not.

~~~

When Christmas Month rolled around, Kurt became a bit suspicious. You had suddenly started to offer to give him foot, neck and arm massages. You also asked more basic questions "what's your favorite color?" for example.

~~~~~

"And this one's for Kurt," Jean said, passing the gift to the blue mutant. Kurt took the box. It was wrapped in a pale blue paper, Kurt Wagner and Nightcrawler written endlessly in delecate silver handwriting. It was decorated with an indigo bow. By the way your eyes shined brighter and you bounced a little, he guessed it was from you. If you had put so much work into the outside, then was the gift equally as amazing or were you trying to make up for a horrible gift? There was a snow white box inside and this time written with black 'For Kurt'.

"Awwww! Thanks Kurt!" you squealed, squeezing the book he got you tightly.

The male's amber eyes widened at that. "H-How'd you know zat it'z from me?" he asked nervously.

You giggled, "Well honey, your handwriting." Kurt chuckled while rubbing the back of his neck.

He carefully opened the box and his heart softened as he saw the inside. A heart shaped gingerbread stared back at him, looking fancy with the pink and white icing. 'Kurt' was written in the middle of the heart. He put the gingerbread on his knee - he was sitting with his legs criss-crossed. Cookie came to sniff the gingerbread but Kurt shooed him away with his tail. In the gift box was a handmade knitted scarf, pair of wooly socks, gloves and even a hat. All in his two favorite colors. Kurt Wagner was embroidered into all of them delicately.

Nightcrawler bit his cheek with his fangs to stop himself from crying out of happiness. He rose his head and mouthed 'thank you' with a smile, his blue face full of graditude. You beamed at that, e/c eyes bright.

~~~

Kurt bent down, hands stretched out to take Scott's gift and then teleport back to his own room. The mutant was about to come back to a standing position when a force crashed into him, sending him towards the floor. Startled, Kurt teleported to the roof. He immediately heard feminine laughing. And jumped away while flipping also to see who had attacked him.

You were wiping a tear from your eye, quietly mumbling, "Oh my God." You then snorted before letting out another guffaw. Kurt playfully glared at you.

"Okay, I'm done," you said but snorted at the end. This time didn't laugh anymore though. "So, I forgot to put one of your gifts under the tree. It's in my room," you grinned. Kurt's amber eyes widened. You had made him another gift? But the one before was more than enough? With guilt, the blue mutant's shoulders fell. He had only gotten you book. "You zhouldn't have, Vögelchen. I only gotz you a book."

You frowned at his sad face. Your s/c hands flew to the mutant's face and made sure he was looking at you. "Hey, hey! Come on now. I had been searching for that book for ages with no avail. Now, get us to my room so I can give you the other gift," you ordered sternly, still holding onto his scarred cheeks. Kurt flicked his tail but bamfed to your room.

The lights were off but since your roommate was a fortune teller who could tell the future by looking into water, there was an exceptional aquarium in your room that's light brightened up most of the room.

Cookie made happy oinks as he saw Kurt and immediately flew off the bed, right onto the Nightcrawler's feet. "You could say the second gift is from Cookie?" you giggled, making two steps towards the big white box on your bed, pushing the crimson and white Christmas wrapping under your roommate's bed.

Kurt pet Cookie while you headed back to the boys, clutching the gift. Once again 'For Kurt' was written on the box. Kurt took the box and sat on your bed, the present in his lap. Carefully, he took the cover off, his eyes widening at the inside. Four pairs of designer footwear. Brown leather winter boots, white, black and red nikes, red and black flip-flops and finally, black rainboots. When he inspected them, he realized that all of them had 'Kurt Wagner' written on the inside.

While shaking slightly, the blue mutant wrapped his arms around you, "Zank you, Vögelchen," he whispered. You just squeezed him tight as a response. The moment was broken by Cookie scratching Kurt's feet, asking to have a hug too. You both giggled and Nightcrawler picked the pig up, giving him a gentle hug. He earned a snout on his cheek and affectionate licks on his chin.

"If you still want to, I think I know how you can make it up," you said slowly. Kurt gave you an expectant look, still rubbing the pink animal who kept giving him kisses.

~~~

"Oh....my....GOD!" you squealed which made Kurt open his eyes. You had asked for him to take you to Finland, so you could see what a real Christmas was like. He hadn't expected it to work. Basically teleporting to the other side of the world sounded impossible but he had done it apparently. It should be an early morning in Finland and it did appear like it was.

You placed the wiggling pig down and immediately, Cookie went to inspect the snow with his snout. A red Christmas sweater was wrapped around his small body.

Since Kurt was absolutely drained of energy - given the fact that he had just teleported the two of you across to world to another continent - you decided to visit a stall and bring the two of you some tea while he rested on a bench, Cookie sniffing circles around him.

After he was up and well again, the two of you had a snowball fight and visited different stalls. Interacting with the sellers was awkward since your Finnish was very very bad and they knew maximum of three words in English. But besides that, you two had fun.

You even saw other... SOME mutant couples hanging about in the very early hours of the morning. There was a girl with the same toned skin as Kurt and crazily long lighter shade of blue hair, she was holding hands with a man who's snake like tongue popped out from time to time. There was also a normal looking woman who's elbow was locked with the elbow of a man who was glowing. Literally. There were three more couples who did not seem normal but you had focused more on your tailed companion.

~~~~~~

When you returned, you nearly gave your roommate a heart attack. She had been making out with her boyfriend Caleb but when she noticed you two awkwardly shuffling, "Oh my fucking God! What the hell Y/n?!" Jemila screamed, ignoring the distasteful twist on Kurt's face at her choice of words. Your Nigerian roommate glowered at you before apologizing to her ginger boyfriend who just nodded awkwardly. He was a shy boy unlike Jemila and at the moment, the color of his face would've matched his hair if it were a little pinker.

"Sooo..." you trailed but were cut off by clap, the lights went out. When they turned back on, Caleb was nowhere to be found. "Oh come on! It took me ages to convince him to come here," Jemila whined, her dark kinky hair pushing to the front of her face as she rolled her head against the walls.

"I better get going too," Kurt yawned. Yes, he was tired but also very uncomfortable with the situation.

When he bamfed away, you laughed nervously as your dark-skinned roommate glared at you.

~~~~~~

Valentine's Day rolled around and you were walking to History class with Jemila. "I swear you better ask him out today because I am tired of seeing you two being all cutesy and cuddly everytime I feed my babies," the girl hissed at you. Oh man, everytime she started to feed her neon tetras and rainbow fish, she started moaning about seeing Kurt and you being a disgustingly cute couple, cuddling on a couch, both looking a bit older.

Even though the visions your roommate got were comforting, you still hesitated on asking the blue boy out. What if he didn't like you right now? Yes, he had taken you to the other side of the world on Christmas but that was because he felt bad for simply getting you a book. Which you loved and had read through three times by now.

~~~

"Yeah, yeah, you know very well what I have planned for today," you grumbled.

"I do and you better go through with it."

Kurt sat down beside his friends. He greeted them, all of them returned the gesture except for Jean and Scott who were being extra affectionate since it was... Well... Valentine's Day. Kurt's amber eyes ran over the cafeteria to see if you were hanging out with anyone. He was both relived and distressed about you not being there. Relieved since he didn't see you with anyone and distressed because maybe you were on a date or something with someone.

The blue-skinned boy shook his head and started eating his salad. He was almost done when there were claps heard and the cafeteria turned dark. There were confused and scared mumbles of other students. But given his multi mutations, Kurt was able to see you scrambling up on the table Jemila and her boyfriend were occupying. You had a guitar in your hands and a mini skirt wrapped around your lower body perfectly which was rare since you usually settled for pants.

Jemila and Caleb ran off before claps were heard again, letting the lights return into the cafeteria. The students mumbled among each other with confusion before noticing you standing there in a royal blue mini skirt and a white dress shirt with blue butterfly print.

"Thank you for your attention and I hope you'll keep quiet now. Hi, yes! I am going to serenade to my hopefully Valentine once I'll finish the song," you said and Kurt's brain started working fast, wondering who you were going to sing to.

"Dear blue, this song I've made for you.

When you found me I was lost, dark and scared and filled with dust.

The real me had gone to hiding,

feared what people might think of me once they will know who I am.

I put on a brave face, tried to save the ones I could without showing who I am.

But when my concert was crashed by the ones I feared the most,

I saw them try to hurt you and I couldn't just stand by.

So I revealed my biggest secret to the humankind.

It closed my door as a star but opened the door of joy and happiness.

The door which you showed me.

Dear blue, this song I've made for you.

You were one of the first ones, who knew who I was behind the mask I put on.

With you I've gotten better.

I don't fear as much as I once.

I feel free and I feel beautiful.

I feel accepted and I feel wonderful.

And so should you.

I know you sometimes feel bad because of who you are and so do I but we shouldn't.

I don't care what people think anymore because...

Dear blue, this song I've made for you.

I've kept these feelings hidden for as long as I've known you.

No it wasn't love at first sight.

But I did feel fascinated by you.

So I got to know you better and I fell in love within a month.

I fear it, yes but I will never regret it because it made me who I am.

The girl standing on a cafeteria table singing a serenade with a guitar.

All eyes are on me but I can only see you here.

Dear blue, this song I've made for you.

On Christmas I made you gifts, was so nervous how'd they fit.

They were perfect, I admit.

Fit you better than I thought.

But you took me to the other side of the world that night.

I know you were drained of that endless energy you always have but you still did it.

It was the best gift I've ever gotten and I thank you for that.

Dear blue, please be my Valentine because...

I love you,

Kurt Wagner"

Kurt felt a tear slip down his cheek. He knew you were singing about him the second you said the word 'blue' but hearing those last words really warmed his heart.

You shyly averted your e/c eyes from his amber ones as you climbed down from the table. You leaned the guitar against the long bench and started to make your way over to the blue boy.

All eyes were on you two.

Kurt stood up and bamfed in front of you, few tears still roaming down his scarred cheeks.

You bit the inside of your cheek while still smiling shyly. "So," you rocked on your heels, "what's your answer?" you asked. Kurt smiled warmly.

"Yes and I love you too, Y/n L/n."

The tailed boy quickly wrapped his arms around you and the cafeteria cheered, happy tears steamed from both of your eyes and he pressed a kiss to your temple.

Cookie ran over and started nudging the teleporter's foot with his snout and the two of you laughed as you detached yourselves and the Nightcrawler bent down to pick the pig up. The pig rubbed his snout against the boy's cheek while giving him kisses.

"And I love you too, Cookie."

90 notes · View notes

theaspers · 3 years

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Zara! I just got back from a short trip. In a perpetual state of i want to do fuck all 😑 but I really should focus n do things. How are u? Anything random u want to share? My face n upper body r quite sunburnt lol so I've been a hermit trying to recover 😂 thanks for the well wishes on the job hunting. My mood on that journey is like ⬆️↗️➡️↘️⬇️↙️⬅️↖️🤣

I revisited hades after u replied! N spoilers: I got past elysium n then died to the Chambers (items got so expensive n it's multiple pathways to find cerb's treat lol n the poison...) butttttt I came back like next run n got hades to like 1/3 of his health and then died!!!! I'm pretty chuffed tho. I know now heueueue. And I MET THAN! GORGEOUS SOFT DEATH BOI. His voice man 🥰 BTW r zag n than half brothers that share hades as their father? But he cute that ain't no lie. I um am assuming u finished at least one complete run so I hope I ain't spoiling anything? I'm really sorry if I did. Third fury sister met too heueu.

Lololol I'm not really shitting on luci's yukata haha. Tbh I've been into kpop n Korean shows for yearsssss so I feel like nothing really fazes me too much? It's funny seeing ppl shit on Satan so much but I'm like honestly it doesn't hurt my eyes that badly. N his Pepsi yukata looks pre good. Not the worst by a looooooongggg shot. I hope the devs fix up the wonkiness of obey me cuz otherwise they will keep losing players n awesome content creators. V understandable tho. That's also why I probably won't play om and genshin cuz gacha, too stressful n it's kinda nice just evolving the charas by headcanons n imagination alone. The lore is v noice tho. Have u read the genshin manga?

Hahaha it's a good thing I thought of u. The fic does have some grammatical errors (I went back to read it again hehe) but it's just so soft n realistic to me that I thought u might like it. Probably ooc for Thea tho sorry. It's alright if u never get to it or don't like it!

Aww my ask got ate up huh. I sent it in the morning after u recommended achilles to me. It just said that the song is so fucking good. So cathartic n would've been such a help several yrs ago when I was going thru some shit. I love the lyrics, the sound...it's very soothing n I love it a lot. I hope to find more English songs that have such beautiful n haunting lyrics. I'm trying not to make the ask too long so I've dumbed the original ask down a lot. It's going to be long anyways 🙃

I asked about any personal hcs u wanted to share? Mine were that I would call Lucifer: Luce Luce or Luci haha. N I would greet him by saying Luci....fer after making eye contact with his brothers above his shoulder but he would be glaring at me anyways. Ever perceptive Luci. I would like to mess around Belphie by calling him Moo Moo 🤭 I hc that once close, I would go around the dining table every morning n give each bro some individual loving. Some nuzzles, cheek kiss ya know n get to Belphie like wut up moo moo? Lplolol thanks for letting me ramble haha this is sort of embarrassing. Can u tell my love language is physical touch 💖

Haha no worries about ur messy blog tho. I love the stuff u reblog. Some legit quality content n it's so amusing seeing the juxtaposition between the sfw n the NSFW. Ur duality zara never fails to make me laugh. If u want u can guess my height. What vibes do I give off? I have a feeling my answer will make u v happy ☺️ ALSO DUDE UR FIRST LANG AIN'T ENGLISH? WAT IS THIS BLASPHEMY? THAT'S SO FUCKIN IMPRESSIVE. KUDOS TO U SON. Wow. damn. U. R. So. Cool. 🙇‍♀️🙇‍♀️🙇‍♀️ Ahem finally much love to Luci anon. Better reinstate their rightful emojis hehe. Thanks for letting me visit again 💙 - (not a) worker lurker

long answer so under a cut hehe.

hey there!! sorry i took so long to reply shsjs but anw hope you’ve been doing well. i have been doing alright too? i guess? lol i have no idea. i’m simply just vibing. i hope the sunburn’s not bothering u as much anymore though! and still wishing you lots of luck on the job hunting front!

oooh, glad to hear that you’ve made some progress on hades! you’re not spoiling anything at all so don’t worry hehe. i wish you luck on your future runs, you can do it!! (side note: those stupid rats. i swear. i hate them so much 😭) AHH THAN!! isn’t he just so precious? 🥺 like i realise he is death but he’s so. soft 🥺 and no!! afaik they’re not related lol i think nyx might have just. made him and hypnos? they grew up together tho, i think. oooh, love the fury sisters. they’re very interesting hehe. definitely missed playing the game but i’m still not in the mood to play it unfortunately. i miss zag tho. and hypnos. ugh one day i’ll pick it back up again 🥺😭

shdjd same tho. and ur right. after seeing all the kpop idol outfits, nothing fazes me anymore. plus i don’t think their outfits are the worst thing ever tbh :’) ugh, i agree. the main route itself is getting harder to play and the non-stop events are tiring. i want to hope that they slow down a lil bit but idk. kinda doubt they will. and the obm gacha rate is terrible but at the end of the day, it is gacha, right? :’) genshin is horrible gacha wise but there’s always a lot to do, and places to explore. plus they’re still updating the game so i’m sure it’ll remain relevant for a little while longer. i haven’t read the manga fully but i have seen bits and pieces, and some screenshots. diluc and kaeya look amazing in them 😭

oof yeah, i still love listening to achilles come down. it’s so good!! definitely very cathartic. i’m glad you enjoy it too. 🥰

ahaha, ngl i just always call him luci tbh. i know he probably doesn’t like it. but like lucifer is just a mouthful to say sometimes hehe i just know he’ll get his revenge on u for calling him that tho. belphie moo moo shdjd that’s kinda cute?? hmm. i don’t think i have nicknames for them tbh? :0 just kinda. shorten their names lol. and there’s nothing wrong with having physical touch as ur love language!! hehe i think that’s cute. i’m sure they enjoy the show of affection anw. i think i would just be way too shy to do anything like that tho :’)

ik people tell me they enjoy the messiness but sometimes i scroll through and get so embarrassed 😭 like i would like to not be perceived, please and thank u. but i’m glad that u enjoy my blog, regardless 😭 your height? :0 oof that’s a bit tough. you don’t radiate short ppl energy. wanna say ur probably average height shdkd and no, that’s definitely not me projecting my own height onto other people :’)

yeah, english isn’t my first language shdjd 😭 but i have been speaking/learning it for a while now. doesn’t matter tho, i still makes mistakes occasionally ahdjd but i’ve stopped caring lolol luci anon has yet to pop up again but it’s okay hehe they’ll get back their rights eventually hehe oh, and thank you for dropping by!! much love 💖💖💖

#oof this was long shdjd #but thank u tho for the ask. always nice catching up w u #answered #lurker anon #long post

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sp00ks-odyssey · 4 years

Text

Okay part 2 here we go

Day 2: The Confession (Slow burn though Stitches isn't really good at believing that someone feels things for her[Kinda like our lovable Ink Sans but he isn't gonna be like that in this one]}

Also I wanted to keep the name Stitches instead of using my real name if that's okay with everyone.

I decided to make Point of views for both Stitches (me) and Ink so you guy's can know both sides of the story,

I am sorry if Ink's actions in this one is off and OOC-ish and I'm sorry if you guy's hate his personality,

If I said something wrong in French i’m terribly sorry, I know nothing about French to be honest.

Warning's: a little bit of abuse, Insecure thoughts, depressive thoughts, negative thinking, some intense fluff, VERY intense fluff and feels......LOTS of feels.

okay....let's do this *deep breaths*

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

HE HAS PERFECT TIMING THANK THE STARS!

After that strange meeting that same day I didn't even get to calm down and understand what had happened, the minute my parents and siblings got home I knew I was in for a bad night, my little brother and sister ran to go play in my little brother's room and my mom started cleaning the living room as my step dad sat on the couch, I knew by the looks my mom and step-dad gave each other my mom got yelled at by my step-dad and didn't get what she wanted at my grandparents, she was glaring at me with so much hatred and I knew she decided to take out her anger on me and start another fight with me to make herself feel better. She yelled at me and demanded I help her clean the living room while complaining I wasn't doing it right and calling me "worthless" and other words as I tried to help her clean, after a few minutes I asked where to put the laundry basket full of clean clothes so I didn't get in trouble for misplacing them and she stated to my step-dad that I was giving her an "attitude" and that I was refusing to help her clean.

My step-dad screamed at me for "Not thinking" and "Being stupid" and "I should know where to put the basket I'm not helpless" he got as my mom put it “So out of control” that she started acting scared and telling him to leave me alone causing once again both of them to yell at each other and I crept away to my room with the basket to fold it quietly regretting my question and feeling like the cause of their fight.

I went to bed that night with another anxiety attack and fell asleep forgetting the whole meeting with Ink thinking the whole thing was just a dream.....

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A week later my parents and siblings left to go see a ten hour long parade with my aunt in another town, thankfully some days my mom actually agrees to make excuses for me, other times she tells them the truth and talks behind my back and sometimes I'm forced to go.

I was in the kitchen instead of my room this time sitting on my stool with my laptop on the table, the picture I was trying to draw this time was an adorable baby raccoon in a trash can with a heart in its mouth, I had my headphones on my head and blaring my favorite songs in my ears as I was trying to sing along to the songs.

I felt two arms snake around my waist in a backwards hug and I made my usual inhuman dog sounding noise and jumped off my stool, my headphone's short wire went taunt and fell off my head onto the table behind me as I spun around and made a poorly fighting pose my fists in awkward angles.

“Woah woah! Easy Stitches it's just me, Ink!”

I gasped at the figure in the middle of my kitchen:

His hands were up in surrender and he was ducking a little his top half practically bending over cause of how tall he was, he couldn't stand up all the way to his full height cause of how low the ceiling was and he was looking at me with his mismatched blinking eyes,

the headphones were still blaring the song I had on loud enough for both of us to hear during the awkward silence as I removed my fighting pose and instead had my hand on my chest panting and trying to breath from the scare and he took to sitting on the floor criss-crossed applesauce looking at me.

“You scared me half to death!” I said after calming down a little bit more and sitting back on my stool.

“I am so sorry about that! I thought it would be nice to give you a hug cause I haven't seen you in a week” He said looking up at me grinning before a look of realization crossed his face.

“OH STARS! I AM SO SORRY! I forgot about your fear of being touched! I am so sorry Stitches!” He started sobbing tears falling down the sides of his skull as he sniffled, I looked around confused and awkward trying to figure out what to do about him crying.

“Did I trigger something again?” he asked lowering his voice after his small outburst looking at me while rubbing the tears falling down his face.

I shook my head forcing a smile, “No no, you're fine I'm just-” I paused.

“Just?” he asked.

“You're......you're actually real! It wasn't a dream I had then”I said more to myself looking down,

“Wait!! Dream is here?? Where? I didn't know he was here too!!” Ink said looking around exited his tears suddenly gone.

“No no I meant I thought meeting you was a dream.....I went to bed a week ago and......forgot about our meeting cause I had an anxiety attack and I rested to calm down and forgot about the whole day assuming it was all a dream” I said looking at the floor embarrassed.

“Oh.....Well I didn't forget! I made sure to write it down on my scarf! I was gonna come sooner but so much went on with my fight last week, a Sans got captured by Nightmare's gang and Blue, Dream and I had to try and get him back and it took a few, few...-wait what were we talking about??” He titled his head looking confused,

I giggled a little at his forgetfulness and he looked up at the sound his eye sockets widening,

“Oh!!! I remember now! Sorry about that I tend to forget a lot” He rubbed the back of his skull sheepishly looking through his notes on his scarf.

I nodded, “I know you do, I pretty much know everything about you and- wait......That sounds like I'm a creeper I'm so sorry about that!! I don't mean to sound like a stalker! That must of sounded rude I'm sorry.....I am so grateful that you decided to show up again, I thought you didn't want to see me again cause of our awkward meeting and you had friends to help who are better than me and you were busy-”

I stopped rambling hearing the familiar small noise he made last time as he vomited black ink on the floor perking up now on his knees and looking at me with his mismatched eyes blinking and changing rapidly.

“Oh wow!!!! You know all about me!! That's amazing! How many Aus do you know?? I know all of them, there is so many! I love seeing each one which Au is your favorite? I personally can't chose they are all amazing!” Ink said speaking fast,

I looked down at the now ink vomited floor and sighed at the poor floor that was now covered in black ink and rubbed the side of my face looking up at the ceiling.

“I can't chose either, they are all amazing to me as well, it's amazing how well the creators think and how amazing the plots are and the backstories and everything!” I flinched still staring at the ceiling hearing the small noise again and in the corner of my eye I saw him vomit more black ink and wipe his mouth looking down at the floor his face a rainbow blush.

“Whoops! I am sorry about that Stitches! Here-” He took Broomie from his back and wiped it clean as I still looked at the ceiling.

“Thank you for cleaning that up.....here, let's go into the living room, the ceiling is high enough for you to stand if you need to” I said getting up and walking into the living room sitting on the couch; my drawing and music forgotten as Ink waddled a little on his knees and came into the living room standing up and stretching no longer touching the ceiling.

“That is much better actually, Merci beaucoup! Thank you so much!” He said as I looked up at him hiding in my hoodie and blushing a little at his sudden words in French, his voice sounded so calm and soothing in French and it sounded like it was meant for just him and his type and tone of voice.

“Are you okay Stitches? You are very red, Ai-je dit quelque de mal? Did I do something wrong?” Ink asked and translated looking at me his skull tilted, I hid in my hoodie further:

It sounds so right hearing French words rolling off his tongue and spilling out of his mouth, that was a weird thing to think....

“Y-y-y-yeah I'm fine” I said turning redder before slowly peeking a little out of my hoodie as he looked down at me grinning.

“I have to say, you are a really shy human” Ink said sitting on the couch next to me and I scooted over a little putting a lot of distance between us and was practically pressing myself up against the armrest, he tilted his skull at me.

“What happened now? Why did you scoot so much?” Ink asked looking at me concern in his eyes,

“I'm j-j-j-just not really good with physical contact or being next to someone on a couch......it's really weird” I said looking down sadly. I felt the couch shift and looked up suddenly being face to face with Ink.

“Tu as de beaux yeux, you have beautiful eyes” He mumbled looking into my eyes.My face burned a bright red and I looked away a bit clearing my throat.

“U-u-u-uhhhhh.....thanks?? They, they look plain to me heh....I'm n-n-n-not really, really used to com-complements by people uhh....how? how do I respond?” I asked laughing nervously as he continued staring.

“You don't have to respond, just know that they are a beautiful shade of blue and grey, they have such a sparkle to them....I see little tiny flecks of brown in them and they are so memorizing, a masterpiece to observe” He kept staring at them mumbling about the colors as I looked around nervously trying to process what was going on-

he jerked back abruptly and I flinched as he stood up,

“Well it was nice seeing you again I must go now, sorry for the short visit I will try and make the next one longer Au revoir!” He made a portal and jumped into it leaving me sitting on the couch still red and confused.

------------------------------------------------------------------------

After that he came by to visit more, sometimes he would stay for a long time and sometimes it was just to drop in and say 'Hi' and then go. I was grateful each time he vomited he would clean it up so I didn't get yelled at.When he came by for long visits I would allow him to search up Aus he knew on my laptop and let him see the art of them by the creators, we would also watch videos and I would show him all the UnderTale and Au related ones, sometimes he would go on and on about something he wanted to tell me and then he would forget what he was talking about and then start a new topic but that was normal for me to hear him do-

my parents and siblings weren't home every time he came over which made me relieved, I didn't want to explain to my parents who Ink was and I didn't want the only happiness I got out of my life to be banned to hang out with me cause my mom and step-dad would use him as an example of what they will take away from me if I don't behave-

after each time he came to hang out and leave I would beat myself up and let my mind race with all the negative thoughts estimating how long he was gonna stick around and how worthless I was and sometimes I would remember something I said during one of his visits and beat myself up over how bad I sounded or how I could of said it-

One of his visits made me think the next time he came to visit that he was gonna say he was gonna leave for good and stop hanging out with me cause I was “too much” for him, he was acting off that day even more off then before, he kept staring at me and stuttering and blushing rainbow, it was a short visit really short and when he left I kinda just sat there trying not to cry knowing he wasn't gonna be my friend or be around any longer.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ink's pov

I made a house similar to UnderTale Classic's home to live and sleep in so I wasn't floating endlessly in my DoodleSphere-

The wooden porch was a light brown color with three steps- the whole outside of the house I painted in every color and the front door was a deep maroon. I went through another one of my portals after another visit to see Stitches and I stepped out in front of the house, I walked up the steps and went through the front door going into the living room and sitting on the green couch sighing in relief clutching my chest,

“Stitches is something thats for sure” I said to myself as my chest made the same pains it's been making the day I met her and every day after my soul-less, empty chest pulsing with pains I wasn't used to.

“It sounds like she has been the one affecting the way you have been acting and these emotions you have been projecting around these last few weeks” Dream said in the doorway.

I jumped, “AHHH Dream! You scared me!!” he chuckled watching my outburst, I cleared my throat-

“It's good that you came though I need your help, why are you always quiet when you enter rooms??” I asked relaxing as he approached the couch and sat next to me.

“Magic~ What do you need my help with?” He asked as I started fiddling with my scarf suddenly nervous.

“Ummmm........uhhhh” I stuttered

“You aren't acting like yourself I can feel it.......Stitches has an impact on your emotions”

The word ‘Impact’ reminded me of the day me and Stitches were watching a YouTube video of Papyrus and Mettaton having a child named Impact and how hilarious it was which made me chuckle snorting a little lost in thought.

“Ink? Did you hear me?” Dream said snapping his fingers in front of me,

“What were we talking about?” I said trying to pretend I didn't know to avoid the conversation.

“Don't play dumb with me Ink! I know you can remember things.....which is another thing. You have been remembering more and more haven't you? And your emotions are interesting and confusing for me to figure out, you only take half of your veils to feel instead of all of them and I've noticed you are lost in thought more,” He paused looking at me to see if I heard him,

I sighed, “You are right Mon ami which is why I want your help with this, she has been affecting me a lot.....in fact.......I think I might like her.....and I'm confused as to what to do about it” I blinked trying to process what I just said.

“You have affections for her Ink, feelings to be with her and cherish her, to be her partner for life, I know what you're feeling Ink, it's my gift as being a guardian of all positive emotions, you have affections for her feelings that you can't explain, I think the next time you go visit her you should confess to her and let her know how you feel” Dream stated standing up,

I paused at his words my bone brows furrowing as I glared up at him feeling angry that he was telling me what to do.

“Don't look at me like that you asked me to help you! Your soul-less Ink, I'm only looking out for you, you are confused about this but I've been around Stitches and felt her emotions and feelings and I know she is confused too, she is fragile and full of self doubt and negativity, she doesn't know anything about love and her fear was quite strong that day her soul is so full of despair it physically wounded me......Ink, focus on how you can make this work for both of you and how to confess to her and make her feel sure about it and please, don't be a jerk about it” Dream looked at me as I processed his words.

“I will do that before I go see her again as to not hurt her, Merci beaucoup, Thank you so much Dream”

He nodded and left leaving me to think.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I hadn't heard from Ink for a few weeks possibly five weeks or more I couldn't keep count and I was worried, I knew he was going to leave our friendship forgotten and never come back. I took up too much of his time he needed to focus on protecting the multiverse and I was just a normal human. Every night I regretted getting attached to Ink my mind screaming at me with negative thoughts as I sobbed myself to sleep-

I got in trouble one day, my mom said that I cleaned the dishes wrong and told me to leave the kitchen so she could “clean them right” so I walked down the hallway to my room a little down and annoyed and sat on my bed and decided to read a book-

my little sister came in being annoying and I told her to leave me alone cause I was reading, she got annoyed at me for not paying attention to her and hit me, it triggered my PTSD and I dropped the book and cowered under her blows as she laughed and called me a chicken until I couldn't handle it. I screamed at her to stop it and shoved her away and she fell on her bed fake crying to alert my mom who came in and accused me of harassing my sister and being abusive because I couldn't dirty the dishes and I was plotting to hurt them all, I got grounded and told I couldn't leave my room for a week and then my parents and siblings left to go get ice cream and to “Get away from that creature you call a sister,” once they left I sat on my bed quietly crying losing track of how long I sat there.......

*****************

“Are you okay Stitches?”

I bolted up looking to see Ink sitting on my floor looking at me with concern and I wiped my eyes nodding,

“Yeah I'm fine. Hi Ink long time no see, didn't hear you come in” I said chuckling with no humor.

“Can we talk for a minute?” he said as I gulped: Today was the day he was gonna leave for good.

“Sure! But I can't leave my room, I got grounded for a week and I don't know how long my parents and siblings are gonna be gone so you will have to hurry and make it quick” I said as he sat criss-crossed applesauce and nodded clearing his throat as I held my breath knowing what he was gonna say.

“Ever since I met you Stitches, I have been feeling very weird, being soul-less makes it hard for me to know what was going on but after talking and getting help from Dream I know what it was, it was love! I love you Stitches! Will you be my girlfriend?” He blushed rainbow fiddling with his scarf as he waited for my answer.

My negative thoughts took over instantly my mind screaming as I just stared at him:

Uh oh..........Of course uh oh!! I just got Ink to like me!! He is soul-less how did this happen?? He's still waiting for me to answer him!! SAY SOMETHING BACK YOU DAMN DISAPPOINTMENT!! I have to say something to him he is just sitting there watching me! But I don't know what to say? If I say No because I'm not ready and I'm going through too much and I don't even know what love is he will hate me for making him feel....but if I say Yes he can destroy my heart and crush it....Just like what happened last time I got attached.....

I opened my mouth to answer him quickly but started full on ranting instead, I couldn't help it-

“Wait! Ink you actually like me like me?? B-b-but what if you get tired of me and leave? What if I'm too much for you to handle? You need to protect the multiverse and I'm too much to handle, I need reassurance all the time and you can't be with me all the time all day and I understand this but...this is...What if we get into a fight and you hurt me cause you can't properly express what you feel? What if you start to hate me? What if I can't give you all you need and my lack of motivation at times makes you weak and not able to fight and you lose an Au and it will be all because of me? What if I shut you out when I'm feeling down, will you force yourself in or will you leave like everyone else I've shut out? What if I'm too damaged for you? I am too damaged.....What if I mess it up? What if I'm finally happy and then you leave and I'm back to being alone? What if your just playing a trick on me and you don't actually like me at all and you are just bored and wanting to goof off, is this is a joke Ink?”

I took a deep breath noticing he hadn't moved from his spot looking at me his mismatched eyes changing shapes as he blinked I looked down sadly.

“.......There are better people out there Ink people better than me, why would you like me out of all of them? There are other choices.....they are prettier than me, talented, worth your time, able to do things for themselves.....I can't cook, I can't draw, sing, nothing......man I feel annoying and needy right now and I'm probably asking too many questions but I just......can't take any more fake emotions not after the last time I-.......I know you have to drink paint to feel so I don't know if what you feel is real or fake, I don't even know the first thing about love! I never had it before, how can I give you something if you can't give it or feel it and I can't properly give it back cause I don't know what I'm supposed to be giving? I'm not good enough for you Ink......I'm no-”

I looked up and flinched making a strange noise and cutting off my words, Ink was suddenly really close to my face his gloved hands resting on both of my shoulders as he stared at me.

“I understand this, we can take it slow no rush I was just confessing you don’t have to accept right now.........you know what you deserve Mon amour? You deserve everything the universe has, you have only seen the dark in this world I can see it when I stare into your eyes you need someone to hold you in the light, to show you the light. You deserve the best and don't think your not worth it cause to me you are! Tu es ma joie de vivre, you are my joy of living,”

He paused rubbing my shoulders and gazing into my eyes his changing every time he blinked at me,

“You never need to worry cause I will never leave you I can't leave you alone! I won't! I refuse to let you believe you will be forgotten and lost!! I will never question you or make you feel bad about yourself, I will be here whenever you need me and I will help you feel safe and I will protect you from everything. I will cuddle you when you feel down even though I know you have a problem of people touching you, you flinch when someone is near you but I will not harm you, you can trust me. I will use my hands for your protection and for your comfort I will never use them against you or with intent to harm you. If you need space I can give it to you but I bet you if you ignore me too long I will be the one grabbing you into a hug and never letting you go, you may think you are clingy and needy but so am I! I won't let you leave my eyesight,”

He paused again both his eyes changing to hearts as he looked at me lovingly.

“I will be your shoulder to cry on and a friend to laugh along with you, I know you think you need to do more and become more for me but you don't need to worry about doing anything for me, you just staying with me and I knowing you are here is what I need, just seeing you here looking into your eyes and sensing your presence here is enough you are a keeper in my eye sockets. Je t'aimerai pour toujours, I'm going to love you forever if you will accept it” He finished looking at me for my answer as I blushed a little at his intense gaze.

After a few minutes I took a deep shuddering breath and slowly nodded hoping I was making the right choice, he grinned and gave me a tight hug burying his face in the crook of my neck and I flinched but slowly hugged back,

“I'm never going to forgive your parents or this universe for treating you so poorly” he muttered making me shiver from the breath he blew on my neck when he talked.

“Let's go” He said breaking away from the hug and holding me out at arms length smiling, I looked at him tilting my head.

“Go where?”

“To the DoodleSphere you are coming to live with me”

My eyes widened as I looked around,

“B-b-b-but.....If I leave my parents will think I ran away and I will get in trouble and-”

“Don't worry about that I will have Dream take care of it, they won't even know where you went and they will forget all about you” he physically flinched at his last words before snapping out of it and smiling at me.

I sighed wondering how long this happiness would last before he actually left me for good.......I was still doubting this whole thing and still a little scared of this sudden change in our friendship. I finally got up nodding.

“Okay let's go”

He rapidly clapped like a little kid and quickly made a portal before he stretched out his arm like a gentleman smirking like a dork and I smiled a little hesitantly wrapping my arms in the crook of his outstretched arm as we went through the portal into my new life my old life shutting behind me.....

__________________________________________________________

Done here is day two @selfshipperapproved

#sanship #ink sans self ship #here it is #self fan fic #i made it too long #i'm sorry

35 notes · View notes

feynavaley · 5 years

Note

Aaaah hi I absolutely love your characterization of the NA bros, especially Matthew! Like you said in your post, people really like to make him OOC, so I really appreciate you for making him the timid, shy, and sweet person that he is! It’s hard to find content like that unfortunately. But I was wondering if you had any headcanons for Matthew and/or Alfred? I’d love to see more of your input on them! Have a great day and keep up the amazing work!! 💖

Thank you so much for this lovely message and for your support!! 💖

About Canada, I’m afraid I might have exaggerated my point a bit in the previous post. Canada isn’t only shy and meek – in fact, he has demonstrated that he can be quite determined and even stand up for himself against America. This brings me to believe that, for how complacent he normally is, Canada is going to stand his ground for something he truly believes in. He also undeniably has a passive-aggressive attitude when pushed to his limit. Moreover, Himaruya has stated that he is a smart tactician (which can also be seen in how he’s able to recognize and hit America’s weak points during their infamous argument) and a good fighter, which means Canada is physically strong as well.

My gripe is with people reducing Canada only to these marginal aspects of his personality. Canada is physically strong and active, that’s true, but, as I have already said, he’s unlikely to match America. [x] He can be snarky and passive-aggressive – but only if pushed to his limit, his general disposition is kind and selfless and he genuinely cares for others. He has dismissed several times his needs and preferences in order to please other people or make them comfortable. And, no matter how much he suffers due to his self-worth issues, he forces himself to be positive and to work hard in order to better himself. This is undeniably a big part of his character, and I always get a bit frustrated when people dismiss it in order to turn Canada sarcastic, bitter, and selfish – because he’s a much better character than that! Sorry for the rant, I hope it made sense, haha. If you’re interested, I have already talked in length about Canada’s personality. [x]

Back to America and Canada, I certainly have a lot of headcanons about them!😊 I have already written down some, you can find them in the following link. [x] (Or, if you’re from the app, in this one: [x]). I even wrote a full analysis of their relationship, once. [x]

On a more general note, I would say that America and Canada are extremely close. Part of this is due to geographical reasons – being near each other, they have more occasions to visit one another. In addition to this, I feel like, being the same ‘age’ and having a similar origin, America and Canada would relate better to one another than to older nations with a completely different history, which would help them feel closer. Moreover, I think that they used to be extremely close during their childhood, after England gained control of Canada. It was only a few years before the Revolutionary War, but from some panels, it almost looks like they used to live together, which would surely have left an impact.

In fact, it’s canon that Canada didn’t want to choose between America and England – and it’s also canon that America was soon eager to rekindle their bond. There was a bit of hesitance on Canada’s part, in the beginning, but it looks like he quickly got over it. From there on, Canada and America are portrayed to be very close and spending a lot of time together. Of course, Canada feels inferior to America and he doesn’t think his brother has a high consideration of him – but America actually feels the contrary, and this has never stopped them from spending time together. I also headcanon that, since the birth of internet, they have been keeping in even closer contact, between phones and social media. America is very active on social media, while Canada posts more sporadically – but, no matter what, they are those two people who always like each other’s posts.

Another important point is that, in spite of the occasional arguments, (that I would also like to mention are quite normal, between brothers) Canada seems to enjoy spending time with America. I think that this is because they share similar interests: they like nature and the outdoors, so I headcanon that they like spending time exploring or simply hiking together, and they also like sightseeing different countries. They both definitely have a nerdy side, too. I can’t help but think that America and Canada love having anime marathons and playing video games together, and they get very competitive about it.

A detail I found quite interesting was how Canada was able to stand his ground only when he was arguing against America. For a person as insecure as Canada is, this is a big hint that he feels more relaxed in America’s presence that he is in the presence of anybody else. He does think America is better in any aspect than he is, but, at the same time, he doesn’t feel like he has to hide his imperfections to him or please him in every way. This is probably the healthiest relationship Canada has in canon, and I can’t help but think it comes from them having spent so much time together since childhood.

On America’s part, I’m certain he’s aware of how much Canada genuinely values him. Given America’s struggles with loneliness and the fact he’s actually aware many nations don’t like him (for how much he thinks they are the ones in the wrong for not liking him – I have already said this, but I think America isn’t too insecure; on the contrary, he has quite a healthy dose of self-esteem), I’m sure he values a lot his relationship with Canada, and Canada is one of the first people he turns to when he’s in need of comfort.

More on the headcanon side, I will never get tired of saying that I think both America and Canada are fiercely protective of one another �� for America, it’s a consequence of his ‘heroic’ fantasies, for Canada, it stems from his deep loyalty to the people he cares for. They both cannot stand to see the other in pain, and will go against anybody threatening him. At the first hint that one is in any kind of distress (sick, injured, or even sad), the other will check on him and, if the situation is dire enough, go to his house to take care of him. This one is kind of silly, but I also headcanon that, with Canada being a very unlucky person, America always has a first-aid kit at hand when they’re together and checks on Canada at least once a day when he knows there’s ice/snow. He gets almost overbearing, but Canada doesn’t truly mind.

And wow, I’m realizing just now that this ramble got really out of control. 😅 Hope it was what you were looking for!

#hetalia #hetalia headcanon #aph america #aph canada #na brothers #analysis #character analysis #feyna's headcanon #feyna talks about hetalia #anonymous #feyna answers #thanks for stopping by!

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goddamnitlady · 6 years

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OOC // super long post of me talking at myself, trying to make sense of my behaviour.

I need to put this chaos of thoughts down on the page. Or else they might claw my skull open from the inside out. This text is so super personal it would fit better in my diary. This is me talking at me.

So no obligation to you to read this!!!

I realise I’m so shaken, that in the below text, I will be (re-)constructing my own narrative about myself. I’ll do that right here.

I will use this narrative to review what I learnt about my behaviour, re-interpret my past and then frame my current social reality. If I use kinder language, perhaps I'll think kinder of myself? Gotta try that. This is my unstructured train of thought, me talking at me. If you want to read about me talking at you, scroll down.

Enjoy some nude TMI. It’s long.

INTRO - BEHAVIOUR

Yesterday I went to A.DHD Central to get tested and maybe a diagno.sis and surprise, I have it! I saw it coming and I'm okay with this. It explains why...

why I'm always so easily distracted

why it's almost painful to be bored

why it's almost to do difficult tasks

why I've got social periods that can last days or month and then suddenly get asocial periods

why I forget something 3 seconds after you said it

why I can't remember more than 3 instructions

why I don't have one train of thought, but 3 or 4. And I need to jump from train to train to keep up with them.

Okay so that's that.

The OTHER thing that I cannot stop thinking about now is just as important. The old man said it very casually, like: "oh btw on such an intense diagnosis day our team of trained specialist always finds other mental difficulties people developed too. AD.HD comes with friends. We see you have (traits of) avoi.dant personality disor.der okay continuing on, your computer test showed..."

And today I'm at home. I picked up my me.ds this morning and I've started dosing. I started thinking, wait what did they say yesterday about that other thing? So I read through Wikipedia.

ME TALKING @ ME. ^That new info about my behaviour changes my interpretation of my past.

Yesterday a professional told me that 50% of the kids with ADH.D leave primary school feeling like an outcast so it's not weird I was bullied too.

On primary school I was dia.gnosed with dyslexia and dyscalculia. It means that letters and numbers magic to me. They tremble and swap places or vanish. The classes Maths and Languages were awful to me. Biology and History were better and more fun but they also make use of numbers (dates/calculations). Art class (with my hands or brain) was the one thing I could actually do. I could do presentations and discussions as well.

But I felt different from my peers because they could learn things so EASILY compared to me. I wasn't dumb, I understood, but then the explanation was gone and I'd forgotten it again(AD.HD). So I needed lots of repetition to learn. And then once I understood it the letters/numbers kept moving without my consent! (dyslexia/dyscalucia) Stupid letters/numbers.

I moved houses and thus switched schools. On the new school became bullied by being socially exluded, ignored, and critisized.

That bullying made me feel like I could be 'attacked' in class all the time. In hindsight I was sensitive to stimuli. Everyone has a filter on their mind that ignores certain things (like the fact you are breathing. congratulations, you are now aware that you are breathing) and lets other things through (such as the honk of a car when you're jaywalking). Child!me must have been working super hard to

pay attention to class

filter stimuli

categorise high-speed which stimuli are hostile

muffle intense emotional reactions

consider which version of reply would create least conflict/emotion

A lack of sleep (from reading books until late) make me sleepy during the day thus less sensitive to (negative) stimuli.

So I became from age 10 onward very much an outcast/ anxious/ nervous/ shy/ avoidant-of-confrontations-where-I-could-be-rejected.

I was bullied on secondary school too. Jackpot.

I worked harder than average but my grades were lower than average. I felt inadequate. Inferior. My self reflection went into overdrive. I started to think things like... if I can't do maths or language and don't like people, what sort of career could I do? What value did I have to humanity? Was I not just taking up resources? I felt guilt and shame that my parents had to waste(!) money on me. No economic equation could justify having me around. I was a useless human being. My only good trait is that I'm kind to people, showing kindness always -- even if they don't deserve it. Because I know what it’s like to be hurt and I don’t want to do that to anyone.

(I feel so fucking lucky that I grew up in a loving family because holy shit teenage!me sounded like the textbook perfect victim for types of abuse.)

I worked hard in all my classes and it paid off. I went to the above-medium level of education for secondary school. Finally away from my bullies at age 15,5! I think that ended my de.pression too. I switched schools to above-medium, it was a normal period on that secondary school. Two more years after that went fine. Made my long-term school friends and cosplay friends in that time and since. Yay!

After that, I studied graphic design on adult education medium level, then for Teacher of English As A Foreign Language on above-medium level, now I'm this(!) close to finishing Literature Studies on university (highest) level. Take that, insecurity. I'm not stupid. My specialities (creativity) just lay elsewhere than the standard measurement.

I read somewhere that AD.HD people don't have normal emotions but that one emotion TIMES TEN. So a small mention of rejecton from another person causes a feeling of REJECTION TIMES TEN in me. I can easily say that I have joy times TEN, fear times TEN, and enthusiasm times TEN too, which can make me a very charming person?

I initially thought this strong emotional fear of rejection was the AD.HD-only symptom called RSD, rejection-sensitive dys.phoria. What makes it into a personality diso.rder?

Answer: Persistent malfunctioning in society.

ME TALKING @ ME. Re-framing my social reality and examining my behaviours.

I malfunction as follows: I experience extreme shyness in certain moments, feel anxious before or during new social situations, don't want to go to the kitchen if my housemates are there, have a fear of emailing/calling people, or approaching groups. Fear of asking money back (I feel like "I'm not worth even a euro"). I have a GIANT fear of being rejected by others. Giant fear of being ridiculed. Cast out.

This leads to a behavior pattern where I avoid conflict. I'm just too scared to do them. Critique freaks me out (because me emotions will skyrocket times ten). And it's the worst when I'm doing a project with people (such as preparing a presentation with a group/making cosplay costume with a friend/travelling home by train and someone needs to pick me up). People are the worst. I feel I always let them down.

So then anticipate on being inadequate, take longer to do it perfect, get ill from thinking up a thousand stressful could-be's, then fiiiiiinally reach out, and hear "you should have done X" or "why didn't you call me earlier?! Now I have to deal with this escalated mess!"

HOW I RESPOND TO ONLINE STIMULI

When friends send me a message online, I get scared. I ALWAYS have fear of opening them. I always think "what did I do wrong this time?" I always anticipate an attack. This is why it's good I have both friends AND other people on whatsapp. Sometimes this emotional anticipation or reaction is so strong that it can dominate my mood for hours.

Sometimes (when I'm most afraid) I open the message to get rid of the notification and don't actually read it.

Sometimes (when I'm fearful brave) I take a deep breath and read it and take an hour to deal with the stressful emotional reaction. I want to reply but 1)I need to think of the perfect reply to type up so the negative situation will be quelled or/or followed by 2) my AD.HD forgets it.

Sometimes (when I'm happy) I can respond immediately. I'm functional!!!

Sometimes (when I'm happy) I respond immediately and them too and it's fun! And I have a blast! Wow, talking to friends is so much fun!!! I'm charming. I'm fast. I'm celebrating.

Nowadays I have a lot of friends. At least twenty five! They're divided into four groups: hometown, student life, online, cosplay. These are "friends without obligation" MEANING that my presence is a addition and not a requirement. They will never guilt me for cancelling on them. We can only hang out once a year and have a blast without talking at all during the rest of the year, and we will still conciser each other friends. I consider them friends if I can message/call them up at 2 a.m. and cry about a boyfriend or needing a place to sleep. Which is a huge deal to me, me-who-feels-guilty-for-taking-up-resources.) It don’t always function. I can hide for weeks, avoiding social contact. Then I can be super functional for weeks. Ups and downs. I function best around friends without obligations.

ME @ TUMBLR FRIENDS.

I suppose I want my tumblr friends to know that...

I 'squish' on a person. I use the word here in the meaning of 'plantonic crushing' and 'wanting to have an emotional bond with them as friend'. I sometimes stalk/bombard a person with messages/like every post/am super invested in everything they do. Usual reason: because I think they are a fantastic content creator. This makes me feel like they are inspiring and amazing and sometimes 'socially higher ranked' than me. To battle my inferiority, I want them to acknowledge me. I want to 'have' them. I hate to admit it, but the words "notice me senpai" sum it up badly. A better way of describing it is “proving my inferiority complex as wrong and my internalised social hierarchy as false as fast as I can”. The resolution is often hanging out in chat and writing a thread together. It will make me realise that we're both humans. Often, once the person gives me attention, I very quickly normalise them and am able to stop bad thoughts. I really dislike the senpai/kohai dynamic and want to get rid of it asap. Giving me attention helps! I've experienced this squishing in class/ social/ work/ online/ cosplay environments. If I am 'squishing' on you, just pat my head, okay?

I feel compelled to admit have had squishes on but then normalised as equal Sky.e, Ni.kki, Ju.lia, E.su, Ham.my, J, Cel.este, Va.na, and various others who I don’t need to mention because I never became friends with them. My squishes on these people were on the creative person as future friend, not(!!!) on the muses. I still have a ton of respect for these people.

People I'm in the process of normalising are Surfi and Jana. I'm doing well. I’m not that bad. When Hammy appears I still want a pat on the head though.

One person I'm squishing on quite much right now is Nami. I want all their attention. Nami, if you're reading this, I hope it doesn't drive you crazy (not as mad as it drives me). So I'm sorry that I post a reply 0.3 seconds after you post and seem to be online 24/7.

And if anyone else is reading this, sorry I’m paying less attention to you.

I hate it when partners drop threads unannounced because I'll be waiting by the front door like a labrador waiting for a dead owner to come home.

Its fine if you tell me you want to drop a thread, no problem, no feeling of rejection here.

It's fine if you take 2 years to reply to a thread. Literally.

I forget thread posts. Feel free to poke me when I take longer than a month.

Me not replying to your roleplay request is because I'm imagining that my rejection of your request will hurt you as much as it would hurt me. I'm imagining your pain and emphasize with my fantasy to the point that I leave your request in my inbox for months. And then it hurts that I didn't reply.

Me not posting your submission/ask message is because I'm always feeling inferior. I don't feel worthy of your attention. I don't feel worthy of your text/art/time, so when I get it I feel THRILLED. Like, "WOW they like me!! Take that inferiority complex!!" I feel thrilled. I have to give you the perfect reply that will show you exactly how thrilled I am. Or give you a perfect drabble as reply.

Me not replying to your chat messages is not me intentionally disrespecting you. You are important. Goddamnit I want to keep you as a friend. It's me being EMOTIONAL AS FUCK AND I'M PREPARING A REPLY or I FORGOT ABOUT IT.

I only give myself permission to delete those after 6 months of struggling.

Me roleplaying super intensely with you and then suddenly not at all, is because the following happened:

I squished on you back then,

we wrote and for a while my days centerend around your online hours,

I normalised you and I found tranquillity (good ending) OR

I was called away because I had ignored real life and it became on fire. (bad ending, very much at risk of uncontrolled squishing on you again!!!)

(I want to continue to enjoy being friends with you Super Duper Much, I respect your distaste for my silences, I’m sorry, and I feel bad TIMES TEN that I put you in this mood.) (I then feel worthless. Then inferior and wow hello devil on my shoulder that tells me bad things. Hey devil if you’re here do you pay rent? And I begin to avoid you which makes you even unhappier. Then I avoid you and - etc. etc. Goddamn I just want to be friends and write rp WHY am I like this! Why am I so fearful? It doesn’t make any sense!)

The thought of writing with you makes me excited times ten. I respect you. And because we didn't RP and you're worried and I feel I let you down... I want to "make it up to you by being perfect and worthy". It catapults me right back into the mindset/habits from where I used to squish on you, and my day will center around you again. I know I don't /want/ that mindset to ambush me. It'll control me. So I either postpone engagement with you, OR I ask/agree a day where we can write together. Then my intense emotions and refresh-the-page obsession and "OH MY GOD THIS RP IS SO GOOD U R SUCH AN AWESOME CONTENT CREATOR WE HAVE SO MUCH FUN" thoughts can be limited to that day. During the next days (I usually need days), I can cool down from the hype and try to continue with my life and productively avoid the bad squish. This may come across as cold. But I assure you, my mind is constantly on you. And when I’m settled, I’ll be easier to approach for casual RP again.

I find it extremely hard to deal with users who see me as their senpai. When I feel that you idolise me as senpai, want my attention and affection, want to be my friend, I get really uncomfortable. I usually search for ways to calm you down and make you realize I'm human. But if I do not feel equal, (because of IM chat/because writing styles clash) I can’t hang out with you. That’s not you, that’s me. Feeling inferior is something I’m trained in now and know how to go to ‘equals’ level fast, I’m not trained at all to feel superior. I screw up wayyy to much to accept that role. I will fear hurting you. I wouldn’t know how to try to become equals. So then I dash away. I’m sorry.

I'm not good at IM messaging in chat on tumblr or other social media online because I'll 1)get scared of the messages or 2) really really want to write with you. So I generally don't want to chat at all, except to plot roleplays. I find it difficult to send friends regular 'hi how are you' messages because I want a "friendship-without-obligations" that I described earlier.

Wow this list must scare you. I'm sorry.

It scares me. Wow, what a manual. I'm so complicated.

I'm worried now about whether I should post this. I sound like such a... a crazy online person that has a ton of things wrong in the head and should be avoided at all cost. ......... No, let me rephrase that. I’m a self-reflective person. I am a critical analyst of my mind and it's unique I can put it into words.

DEAR TUMBLR FRIENDS...

- You don't want my squishing + I don't want my squishing. Let's work together so this bad mindset doesn't thrive, OK?

- You don't want to be ignored + I don't want my ‘conflict avoiding anxiety’ that makes me ignore you. Let's continue to communicate!! Please sandwich your critique in kindness. Kind-critical-kind. Then I'll reply faster!

- I am worth as much as every one of you. I am NOT your kohai and if you start seeing me as such I'll feel offended. I'm worth as much as any of you. (My mind cannot be trusted.)

- You cannot control what emotions I feel, nor the intensity. Anything(!) could spark me to go into a different mindset.

ROLEPLAY I suppose I have a 'type' of muse.

I like writing confident-arrogant muses who never hesitate about being better than others. They used their unique traits that set them apart to excel (not fall), and are so fearless of social rejections that they boldly abandoned social-mediocority to craft a setting they thrive in. Its because their growth/conquer mindsets appeal to me. I want to continue training myself to think like that. It helps battle my fears. I identify with them. Reasons: I worked hard and rose from being bullied at primary school and medium education level to upper-middle level. Now I'm at highest level of education (university) despite my flaws. I channelled my traits of creativity + kindness + hard work and made a ton of friends. I am now struggling with my university bachelor thesis. I have to finish it asap, but damn, I'm amazing, I never thought I'd get this far?? I'm in my world of my own making. My loving supporting surrounding friends/family/teachers help me function.

IN CONCLUSION....

So in conclusion, I can only ask for your friendship, your kindness to forgive me when I mess up, and to please occasionally pet my head.

In return, I will generously offer friendship for however long you want me, will bravely engage in struggles to reply to your messages in time, and I offer you lots of FEELS from my muses.

I'm going to make sure that the time we hang out and write together, will be the MOST AMAZING EXPERIENCE.

Excerpt from my thoughts to show you how it goes: Small bad thought in my head: "don't abandon me, please accept this RP service I offer, because you won't hang out with me for my personality due to my bad attention/communication skills. I can see why you like my Orochimaru/muses but can hardly see why you could like me." Louder good thought in my head: "Shut up you're a feeling from the AD.HD or conflict-avoident-personality-type part of my brain and you can't be trusted. LA LA LA I'M NOT LISTENING. I'M GREAT." Small thought: "...Keep telling yourself that." Louder thought: "Ouch. I mean. LA LA LA. POSITIVE SELF-DECEPTION AGAINST BAD THOUGHTS UNTIL IT'S AN INTERNALISED TRUTH IS AN EMPOWERING METHOD THAT WORKS. LA LA LA." So that’s how it works. Sometimes I cannot differ which of the thoughts is bad and which one is the good one.

EPILOGUE, I’m done.

Okay. I think I have figured myself out. I’ve re-evaluated my past.

The urgent mess of thoughts in my brain has calmed down. I no longer feel like my head will explode.

I’ve said all the things I wanted to say to myself, and I’ve said the things I want to say to tumblr friends.

I’m going to pretend nooooo oneeee took the time to read this big post... so no one will be angry (something which I fear for no logical reason) ... and I’ll be able to sleep right now.

#lady vs life #ooc

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kopfkinoes · 6 years

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I’ve been a Naruto fan for like 13 years now but after the manga ended I pretty much left the fandom because I anticipated the vitriol that was going to follow after the ending. Every once in a while I stumbled upon a Naruto post that made me realize I had been right and I didn’t interact. But at the end of 2017 I came back and…nothing has changed. I honestly think this is one of the worst, most immature fandoms out there. I feel like so many of the people in the fandom are perpetual twelve year olds. And it kind of bothers me that Sasuke and Sakura, my absolute favourites since day one, are still disrespected as fuck. Now, mind you, I’m not talking about the ship, I’m talking about them as individual characters although I do ship them. I’ve multishipped for a long, long time but not anymore.

They are the first ones I shipped because I had a feeling stuff was bound to happen between them but then I discovered the wonders of the web and instantly moved to ship Naruto and Sasuke. I never once hated Sakura and Hinata though and even in the later years when “feminist” rhetoric moved into fandoms, I took the “these women are strong and powerful and I love them, they don’t need no man” thing to be good. But after the ending, and now seeing how many of the people who ship Naruto and Sasuke are downright anti-Sakura and insult and disrespect her in so many ways I realized “Wow! I had been an idiot all along. These people never gave a shit about Sakura, they were saying all of that stuff to get her out of the way.” I don’t see people talking about how Naruto and Sasuke’s bond diminishes their battle abilities, I see none of the shippers implying that their development would be flushed down the drain if they ended up in a relationship. Yet, that is apparently true for the women. Right.

Sasuke is a character with a lot of potential. But he was never able to evolve. And do you know why? Because of Naruto. Sasuke was created in order to be the opposite of Naruto and, for the most part, that is all remains to be. I’ve been staning Sasuke forever but this is the truth. He exists in order to be Naruto’s rival and in order to be pissed that he, a guy coming from a clan of prodigies, keeps falling behind the class clown and loser (who is anything but that when you think of it, Minato was anything but a weak guy and Kushina, while we don’t get a good look at her abilities, has loads of stamina and healing powers and her abilities were considered exceptional even among the Uzumaki, not to mention how easily Naruto masters everything new he tries). In the end, he is subdued by Naruto and the Will of Fire.

Even after all of this, he is still not allowed to be around his family. Why? Simply because he needs to be the opposite of Naruto. He needed to point a sword at his own daughter and it was Naruto who had to comfort and reassure her. Sasuke will never be an overly affectionate person, I don’t think he will ever realistically go back to his pre-massacre personality (he wasn’t exactly super bubbly as a child either, he was reserved around other people but very happy around his family) and frankly, he doesn’t need to. He wouldn’t ever be a husband who does grand romantic gestures or a super cuddly father but he’s loyal and devoted and these things shouldn’t be brushed away for some mission or for creating angst just to prove that Naruto is a better, more understanding person that he’ll ever be, even when it comes to Sarada. Like, for fuck’s sake, does everything Sasuke does need to happen right before Naruto waltzes in and puts him in his place by being a better person? Can Sasuke not be a person in his own right without the constant comparisons to Naruto?

What I also find interesting is how often I see Sasuke becoming completely OOC when paired with Naruto. Of course everybody says Sasuke is OOC when paired with Sakura but frankly I’ve rarely seen Sasuke presented as lovey dovey around Sakura, people usually want him to be proud of her but he stays his usual tepid self. Because that’s Sasuke’s personality, he’s not a conventionally affectionate person and there’s nothing wrong with that. That’s why it bothers me when I see Sasuke made to be a soft, sensitive, pastel boy aesthetic. He’s not that and he wouldn’t be that even if he were gay. I mean, I understand headcanons but don’t root them in the “seme and uke” dynamics, please.

Moving on, I have a particular kind of contempt for people suggesting Sasuke cheated on Sakura with Karin. It makes absolutely no sense character-wise and it just shits all over Sasuke by assuming he’s a disgusting fucker who would cheat. Are you telling me that the dude who didn’t even consider taking advantage of even a single one of the girls who were fawning over him would have a face-heel turn and cheat? Yeah, right. I don’t understand how you can call yourself a Sasuke fan and genuinely support cheating. Why would Sasuke wait to be with Sakura in order to have sex with Karin when he and Karin had so many opportunities to bang prior to this while they were travelling together as a team? Why would he have a child with Karin and just dump the child on Sakura’s head? I don’t even want to hear superiority arguments that go along the lines of “Karin is an Uzumaki so she has superior genes compared to Sakura who doesn’t come from a clan” because…arguments like these are disgusting. I don’t think it was ever even slightly implied that Sasuke (or the Uchiha for that matter) held beliefs like this. If anything, these guys didn’t like being othered and set apart from the rest of the village. I don’t think Sasuke ever implied that he believes some vaginas are not genetically pure enough for him to get into so please don’t put these shitty beliefs on him. Sasuke was described as “pure”. It’s simply the way he is. I really don’t care that you think he’s not a “True Hetero Guy” unless he cheats and/or has sex with loads of women.

I always see people saying fans who ship Sasuke and Sakura are “disgusted” by the thought of Sasuke having sex with someone else. But do you know how many people I’ve seen saying how grossed out Sasuke must be by being around pussy (specifically Sakura’s) and how he probably cries and is traumatized by the experience? I’ve yet to see people talking about how Sasuke must be super disgusted by dick.

Moving on to Sakura, pretty much 100% of the vitriol I’ve seen thrown at her comes from misogyny. People always like to say it’s not misogyny and yet it always is. It comes from Kishimoto himself and his ideas of women. He constantly described Sakura as “not cute” and “a hard woman”. And it’s true, Sakura’s not demure or submissive and doesn’t appear to be very suited for domesticity. I don’t believe that just because she is loud and outspoken she would make a dreadful wife and mother. She was very shy as a child (mostly because she was insecure) but she grew into herself. About her not being cute, I’d say that’s debatable. Kishimoto said she’s not cute in the beginning and I see a lot of haters talking about “that ugly bitch Sakura” but let me tell you this, Naruto and Rock Lee had pretty intense crushes on her and Jiraiya compared her appearance to Tsunade’s (although the man’s trash when it comes to women but you get my point). What do people base their opinions on when they say she’s ugly? On her exaggerated anger expressions? Because Sakura is not drawn as prettier or uglier than any of the other female characters. Is it based on the fact that people love to bring up time and time again, that she doesn’t have big breasts? Yeah, she doesn’t have breasts as big as Tsunade’s or Hinata’s or even Ino’s but what does that have to do with anything? Nope, this is rooted in misogyny because, just like in real life, when you don’t like a woman you insult her based on her body and appearance because you believe that’s where all the worth of a woman is. Besides, don’t you think there something wrong with focusing so much on the body type of a girl aged 12 to 17? Because I think there is.

I always feel like laughing at people who call her stupid because Sakura is a nerd. This is why she was paired with the more battle prone Naruto and Sasuke because she was too much brains and not enough brawn. I know that it was Ino, Shino and Sasuke that graduated top of the class but, according to the Databooks, none of them beat Sakura in intelligence, she is equal to Shino and higher than Ino and Sasuke. People love to say that her being able to do the written part of the Chunin Exam all by herself doesn’t prove that she’s actually smart, buddy, it does. The fact that she’s smart doesn’t make the rest of the students who cheated idiots. That was the point of the test, the questions were too difficult for 12 year old genin to answer. The fact that Sakura could, however, isn’t bullshit. You wouldn’t call an exceptionally gifted kid who can answer really advanced academic questions “not that smart really, it doesn’t prove anything”. Freaking Sasuke commented on her analytical abilities, she’s an extremely skilled med-nin, she is able to put pieces of information she’s previously learnt together in order to form a present opinion, her hobbies are trivia games and memorizing medical ninjutsu material for God’s sake.

I definitely don’t think comparing her to Hinata achieves anything. Hinata does represent the ideas Kishimoto seems to have about women. She is soft-spoken, she is never confrontational, she never wants to offend anybody. Sure, Hinata also has her insecurities and doesn’t place much value on herself (we have her father to thank for that) but even after getting out of that shell and discovering she has some iron at her core, she is still mostly soft. That’s not a bad thing at all, it’s simply who she is as a person and it doesn’t make her better or worse than Sakura. I know that Sakura fans have always been bullied online, from forums to YouTube to tumblr to any other comment section of blogs and stuff, people have always thrown shit at Sakura, saying she’s useless, a whore, an idiot. The amount of times I’ve seen people wish violent, horrible deaths on Sakura (for the sole reason that she didn’t spread her legs for Naruto being the catalyst in pretty much 100% of the cases) is immense. The amount of times I’ve seen people wishing Hinata would kill Sakura “for what she did to Naruto” is huge. So based on this, I understand why Sakura fans feel the need to get defensive. I don’t agree with putting Hinata down but I understand why some people might do it. I’ll never put down someone’s fav (especially when the fav is as unproblematic as Hinata who honestly did nothing wrong) but I definitely understand why some people will do it.

Naruto is a shonen, battle manga. We will never get 100% healthy relationships in this because the manga is not focused on romance. It is why the relationships between Sasuke and Sakura and Naruto and Hinata were not greatly developed and why there was an overemphasis on Naruto and Sasuke’s bond which is basically “we’re forever competing to see who’s better”. Kishimoto based it on his relationship with his brother but I’m pretty sure he took it up to eleven in the manga. Because Naruto is a manga for whom the target audience is boys, female characters will never be 100% appreciated. Most of the boys watching identify with the downtrodden outcast, guys such as Lee or Naruto. It’s a thing, associated with the stereotype of the Western man who watches anime, a stereotype that is proved to be correct in most cases, sadly. How many of these guys think they’re gems, that they’re precious souls to have around and girls just don’t see them for what they are? Both Naruto and Lee are very loved among male fans and they are both rejected by Sakura. (I could also say something about the stereotypes Western anime watching men place on Japanese women, namely “the pliant, submissive wife, who would do house chores all day, would never say no to sex and worship them as the much better versions of Japanese men that they are” but I’m not going there.) Never cruelly though, she remains friendly with both of them. Her bond with Naruto is very strong and they’re actually a pretty rare example of a good male and female friendship (the violence that is played for laughs doesn’t really mean much to me).

However, for the male fans that is never enough. How many times did I see stuff like “She chose Sasuke although Naruto never left the village” or “Naruto did so many things for her yet she still chose Sasuke”. Dude, there was never a competition. Sakura loves Sasuke, plain and simple. You can disagree with that if you want, you can disagree with how she expresses her love for him but there was never competition. Sakura has always loved Sasuke, what she feels for him is true love. Many people don’t believe it exists but it is what it is. I find it funny (and by funny I mean idiotic to the heavens) that people always say her development was crushed because she didn’t give up on Sasuke but Naruto’s was improved by not giving up on Sasuke. This is bias and misogyny at its finest. Sasuke is not just a crush to Sakura. People always want to say Sakura was a fangirl to Sasuke and nothing more and that she simply needed to get over her obsessive crush. She wouldn’t have said all she wanted was for him to acknowledge her if he were just a crush, she wouldn’t have suffered so badly over him. Many of the village girls had a thing for Sasuke and I doubt all of them cried over Sasuke at night after he left. Only Sakura anticipated when he was going to leave. People always say that Sakura maturing would have meant her understanding that her and Sasuke are just not meant to be a thing. The thing is, she wasn’t holding on to the idea that her and Sasuke would be “a thing”. Kakashi made it pretty clear (to Sasuke and to all fans who just can’t get it in their heads) that Sakura only wanted to help him, not to get into his pants.

People are also super quick to judge the relationship between Sasuke and Sakura as abusive. Why though? All the times they were violent towards each other (and there weren’t even that many times) they weren’t dating, they were combatants on opposite sides of battle. There is nobody in this series that Sasuke is more violent towards than Naruto and yet I never see this relationship classified as abusive, instead it is considered romantic and heartfelt that he wanted to sever his bonds with Naruto in order to make a martyr out of himself and be consumed by darkness. Like, yeah, that’s super healthy. I see the same thing being said with Karin, that Sasuke impaled her simply because he wanted to cut all of his bonds, not because he actually wanted to kill her. Which is…stupid to say the least. Like, cool story, still murder. He knew that impaling her would result in killing her but damn, was he willing to make that sacrifice. The reasons why Sasuke wanted to murder the people in his life are not important. In truth, all the murder he wanted to commit was because people were getting in the way of killing Itachi and, after killing Itachi, people were getting in the way of his goal to be completely alone in order to destroy/reform Konoha. Sasuke is not a psychopath who murders for fun but that doesn’t mean he was in a good place.

I shipped Sasuke with Karin but I never saw their bond as overly emotional or true love. I’m not saying Karin doesn’t care about him but I do think her feelings for him are more in the realm of sexual than the romantic. She does care for his well-being, she wants him to be happy, she is impressed by him and wants to be around him but it’s not romantic. Does she suffer when she thinks he’s dead? Naturally. Because she cares about him and she does love him but, again, not romantically. Karin’s sexual feelings for Sasuke are not bad, they don’t make her a whore or whatever. But it’s quite silly in my opinion to mistake them for some sort of pure, true love. They’re not that and it’s fine that they’re not. We see Sakura wanting to be alone with Sasuke but she never thinks of how she’s so excited she can barely stand it and how she wants to “ravage Sasuke like crazy”. We don’t see Sakura’s reaction, upon seeing Sasuke arrive on the battlefield to be “I want to lick Sasuke all over right now”.

People always like to remind everyone that Sakura ended her friendship with Ino over Sasuke. However, we never see Sakura and Ino be hostile to each other. Compare their rivalry to the one between Sasuke and Naruto to understand what I’m saying. They had a mild dislike going on but we see them quickly overcome it in the Chunin Exams. Sakura and Ino never really gave up on their friendship, their rivalry was mostly played for laughs, I never took it seriously because I don’t think it was presented in a way that was saying “you need to take this seriously, this is the real deal”. Mostly because it dealt with who has prettier hair and who can get the seat next to Sasuke first. Nope, not serious.

Back to Hinata, this is the reason why so many of the fanboys prefer her. Look at the opinions Shikamaru, another character the fanboys adore, has about women. He is downright misogynistic but that gets overlooked in fandom time after time because of his 200 IQ. Instead, I see people saying it is Sasuke who hates women when there is no indication of that, except, you know, people who think he’s gay and because he’s gay he MUST hate all women and consider them absolutely gross (except for the, sometimes OC, self-insert in fanfiction). Just like his father, Shikamaru has this thing that women should be sweet, soft and tender not headstrong, demanding and even harsh (women like his mother, Yoshino, Ino, Temari, Tayuya). He hates receiving help from women, he is frustrated when he has to fight women. He sums up his views of women himself by saying “C'mon. You know what they’re like. You can never figure them out. You never know where you could stand with them. The smallest things could put you in their bad side. Always playing little mind games with you. Trying to make you do what they want. They’re just a big pain basically.”

For the most part, many fans linked Sakura to Kushina because of her fiery personality. Minato kinda sealed this comparison when saying Sakura reminded him of Kushina. So a lot of people, while calling Sakura an ugly bitch and a whore who needs to be raped and die, still wanted her for Naruto and believed she will ultimately change her mind and go for Naruto. Personally, I don’t care about that because so many characters in Naruto are carbon copies of people who came before them, enough similarities are enough. This idea that a guy should marry a woman just like his mother is weird for many reasons to me. It’s only men that have unhealthy relationships with their mothers that want a woman exactly like their mothers. Then the ending came so Hinata, being the embodiment of what a woman “should be” became more appropriate for Naruto in the eyes of so many fans. The fact that she fits these patterns doesn’t take away or add to Hinata’s character in any way. It just is. However, fanboys will use it in a sexist way. I definitely don’t agree with the criticism for Hinata that it’s wrong her motivation for becoming strong is Naruto. The motivation of pretty much all characters in becoming stronger is in order to protect others and there's nothing wrong with wanting to improve yourself because you feel that would put you on more equal grounds with the one you love. This manga places great value on the power of unity and community and people who seek power for power’s sake, for revenge or for evil don’t do well. They are either defeated or they change their minds. Great emphasis is placed on the “you only become strong when you have someone you need to protect” mentality. And women are allowed to make connections in this life, they don’t have to live “lone wolf” lives in order to be “truly strong”. Loneliness is an enemy in and of itself in Naruto.

Kishimoto’s views on women are not necessarily progressive but they’re not exactly bad in my opinion. It all has to do with how fanboys twist his ideas and make them bad. Because I don’t think he ever blamed Sakura for not hooking up with Naruto. I know there are people who believe that he’s holding onto the belief that people (and women especially) must forever be with their first love. I think it just so happens that Naruto and Sasuke were Hinata’s and Sakura’s first loves but, more important, they are their true loves. Ino moved on and I see people saying she shouldn’t have. Damned if you do, damned if you don’t I guess. To sum up, I’ve yet to see dislike for Sakura that’s not misogynistic. I’m not even talking about people who think she’s weak. She is the only one who’s not from a clan and yet she managed to surpass Tsunade, a Sannin. She was impaled by Madara and shook it off immediately, she saved Naruto’s, Kankuro’s, Hinata’s and Karin’s lives, she saved Sasuke from an infinte desert, she saved Obito from a sea of acid, she punched an alien all-powerful goddess in the face.

People saying shipping Sakura and Hinata with the guys they’re canonically in love with proves their fans are selfish because they just want them to look cute next to Sasuke and Naruto amuse me. That if you really cared about them you’d ship them with guys who “actually” care about them like Lee or Kiba or whatever. Dude, people love who they love. And a woman has no obligation to be with a man who was friendly and nice to her, not even a man who has a crush on her if she’s not attracted to him or doesn’t love him.

#my post #not even going to tag this because not only am i not trying to start a fight i don't want any #these are simply my thoughts #i never thought i'd be this involved in this fandom in my 20s #mind you i don't think either of these relationships are abusive #like i said this is a battle manga with battle situations #combatants fight it's the way it is #but if you're gonna consider one abusive based on standards you made up #might as well not be a hypocrite and consider all ships abusive #even the ones you like #honestly all the pseudo arguments i've read are baseless #just admit you don't like certain ships and move on #no need to give justification #because you're tying yourself in knots and just soundind like a jerk

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dangan-ronpa-v3-imagines-blog · 7 years

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Thank you so very much anon! Praise like this always makes my day

Mod Harumaki

-Listen, I like hugs more than the average person

-Even with no idea who you are and a sudden hug as my only interaction with you, I would probably hug back out of reflex unless you look like a serial killer or a kidnapper tbh

-Once you introduce yourself as Anon, I will refer to you only as Anon, and I likewise would not respond to my own name

-You are Anon

-I am Mod Harumaki

-I have no name other than Harumaki

-After that, expect lots of V3 fangirling to compensate for the fact that none of my irl friends are into Danganronpa

-Once I finish incoherently screaming about why Maki is best girl and why Shuichi is best boy and why Ouma is my son and why I would let Tenko beat me up any day ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°), I would actually be able to focus on the blog

-”Which one of my imagines is your favorite? Which character do I write the best for? Have you sent in any requests? How can I improve as a writer? Do you think there’s any characters I’m writing as OOC? Are my imagines the right length? Do you think I may have accidentally spoiled something?”

-I hope you have answers Anon because there’s no escape from me when I’m excited

Wow, thanks a ton for the praise anon! It’s a pleasure that people like the new theme I tossed together. Here’s my imagine for if you glomped me, the glorious genius writer…

Mod Iruma

I like hugs, don’t get me wrong! But I would probably flinch reallllyyy hard if some (incredibly amazing) stranger suddenly embraces me in public.

I would probably poke and prod you with questions about the display until you tell me that you’re a fan of mine, in which I would be really excited and happy.

Like. REALLY excited and happy.

Less that you’re a fan of mine, but more that you like Danganronpa and is so passionate about it!

I would first ask if you’re spoiled and if you were, then I would force you to get into a huge discussion with me about [INSERTCHARACTERHERE]’s portrayal and if it was good and what did you think of [INSERTCHAPTERHERE], did you like the executions—

Also, if you weren’t converted over to Makisim, I would make sure to do so. Even if you were unspoiled, in which I would use her stunning personality to win you over.

I would do all of this while you’re still embracing me with a hug. I-I hope you don’t find it too impersonal? I’m not too touchy-feely.

But I love receiving hugs! Even if I don’t show it!

I would try to hug you back, which is… really… awkward.

…But it’s the thought that counts, r-right?!

Oh gee, ‘adorable newbie’ Anonymous, you’re so kind!! Mod Tenko hasn’t even done much on the blog yet, but it’s still good to know that you like the work she has provided so far!!

Okay here we go:

Mod Tenko. >> Don’t worry Anonymous! Mod Tenko also likes hugs!! >> But if you were to suddenly hug her out of no where in public she would most likely scream from the surprise. >> But the moment I realize you’re just hugging me, and you tell me why and how you know me I will gladly hug you back in a big embrace!!! >> I’mma hugger!!!! so hugs are always welcomed within reason :3 >> And if you are to somehow tell me that you are actually a fan of my writing, then, you’re gonna have to deal with a flustered Mod Tenko until one of us leaves the conversation– >> I don’t get complimented often, and getting complimented over something like my writing is REALLY flattering to me!!! thank you >> I don’t necessarily crave praise or anything, just know that I’m very grateful for your kind words! big or small!! they mean A LOT!!! >> And i probably don’t even deserve them tbh but still thanks. >> Also! don’t. compliment. the mod. or you will have to deal with an awkwardly flustered mod tenko who cannot take the kindness of your souulll-- >> sndfioaghdfudagkbadhavksdvsduasyddfnkdshfud– >> I’ll want to progress the convo and will probably trip over my words A LOT since I’m very awkward…but i mean well! and i’m just excited to meet you Anonymous!!!! >> I will ask you tones of questions about the blog and what you think of it!!! >> I barely get to meet internet friends– >> And yes!! Friendship is a must beyond this point!!!!!!!!! >> I’d prob’ly steer the conversing in the way of v3 somehow since i am in love with it!! but i would be very weary of the topic until i know how spoiled you are >> Mod Tenko is also a clinger, so if the chemistry between us is good, i will want to keep the convo going for as long as i can!! [cuz my irl friends aren’t even all that passionate about dr ;-; like at all] >> Friendship. >> \*o*//

Oh um, I really liked doing this! It made me so happy like seriously I couldn’t stop smiling haha ! So here it is and also Thank you Anon

Mod Kiibo

~ I really do like hugs a bunch but don’t have too many because of my anxiety

~ But after the sudden hug you gave me I would definitely hug back with no hesitation

~ After it I would be a mess, just internal screaming a lot

~I’ll introduce myself as Mod Kiibo and you would do your introduction too

~ Then after introductions, I’ll question you as to why you hugged me so suddenly not that I didn’t appreciate it though

~ Once you tell me you are a fan of mine, I’m more of a mess than before

~ Just

~ AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

~ I wouldn’t scream that out loud of course just internally in my mind

~ I would try to bring up Danganronpa to see what type of conversation I could bring up

~ After that little awkward prompting, I would be immediately rambling about everything relating to Danganronpa with full passion along with you and check how spoiled you are so I don’t say anything wrong or spoil you about anything

~ I would make sure I don’t interrupt you and listen to everything you want to talk about

~ I don’t get to talk a lot that often and when someone just wants to genuinely talk to me I get all nervous so I’ll probably thank you for all your kind words and your discussions with me

~ I don’t feel like I deserve much praise at all so nice words like that make me extremely happy

p~ Like I said I do like hugs so if you wanted anymore I’ll give it to you, I wouldn’t do anything that would make you uncomfortable

~ Overall I would appreciate every moment you would spend with me from the bottom of my heart

Mod Ouma

-gets hugged-

……

-awkwardly pats you on the head/back before hugging back?-

-I wouldn’t really know what to do in situations like this….

-BUT that doesn’t mean that I don’t like hugs :D

-So if you told me you were a fan of me, I would kinda hug you back tightly, with your consent off course.

-I would also grin and thank you for taking the time to read my writings…

-….And also for feeding my ego.

(YES……FEED THE EGOOOOOO)

-I would also kinda invite you for food and maybe chat about some other stuff since I like some other fandoms(majority is hetalia and vocaloid and visual novels-),

-I also kinda enjoy talking about other countries and what its like to live there cause I’m WAY too curious about these things.

-In short, my mood would improve tremendously after this encounter for a few days and I would TRY work harder you guys:3

Thank you so much for these kind words! I hope me and other mods provide a lot of prompts in the future! -- Mod Tsumugi

Just like other mods I like receiving hugs! But I also don’t usually feel comfortable with any physical touches.

So... That would be very awkward for the first time. For the next minutes I’ll try to relax.

Would probably give you a squeeze and maybe even a pat on the back.

I don’t have so many fans to be honest, so I’ll start gushing about it non stop. Then switch for favorite fandom and characters.

If I find out that your taste is similar to mine, you’ll get a free hug from me.

Yet ANOTHER hug if you’re into Tokusatsu.

If not, I’ll try to drag you here! Without being a huge pain in ass.

Maybe even I’ll draw stuff for you, but who knows.

I really do hope that we will bond and become great friends!

I never expected this kind of ask, but alrighty then!

Mod Saihara:

-okay I’m not very used to hugs bc I don’t like physical contact that much

-Hugs in general aren’t really my thing haha

-I’d probably wait a minute before hugging back

-”Who is this human and why are they hugging me this is weeeeeird”

-Once you told me you were a fan I’d probably smile a bit

-”I’m not that active on the blog so you probably would rather hang out with the other mods haha”

-I’ve been told I have problems accepting compliments I’m sorry

-And then I’d ask if you’re into Voltron and Hetalia and stuff bc I need to fangirl with other people over other fandoms lol

Mod Himiko :

. Omg , mod himiko loves hugs ! Maybe even more than an average person ...

. Soo , your hug is gladly accepted ! It’s a bit embarrassing for me bc it’s the first time an anon hugs me but who cares ?! Hugs first !

. I’d probably blushing a lot if you hug me first but I would definitely hug you back !

. I would be a bit concerned about if it was okay for a new mod like me to be hugged since i feel like I don’t deserve such a sweet gest ..

. Once I thanked you , I’d probably be a bit nervous about what should we do but I’ll be super happy and more motivated to show to everyone (and you) my skills !

. Maybe I’ll give you a little smile and then hide behind Mod Harumaki ... Shy Himiko

#mod harumaki #mod iruma #mod tsumugi #mod kiibo #mod ouma #mod saihara #mod tenko #mod himiko

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kaaras-adaar-a · 7 years

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// I was going to leave this for next Monday when it’s the official date, but chances are I’ll be working or away and I’m not certain yet, and with so many other people posting theirs, I figured I’d jump on the bandwagon!

I can’t believe I’ve had this blog for two years already on the 20th of February. Kaaras’ blog started off as a place for me to keep everything Dragon Age related (and Kaaras related) as an archive of sorts. Where I could share his game play with a friend of mine, and where I could store my art of him and screencaps.

It wasn’t too soon after when people approached me if I RP’d at all or asked IC questions, etc. After some pretty bad experiences in my previous fandom, I was a little nervous to start Rping on tumblr again. I’ve been SO overwhelmed with the positive response that Kaaras has been given. Honestly, I have met so many amazing people in this community.

Dragon Age and Kaaras helped me a lot through some darker stages in my life, through some pretty severe depressive states and mental struggles. He’s been a huge support beam for me, and honestly he’s made so so happy over these last couple of years. Kaaras very much became a person to me, and he’s now so much more than I ever could have imagined, no thanks to all of you and your support and interactions over the years. <3

So first of all, thank you to EVERYONE who has ever interacted with Kaaras, whether you’ve stayed or left, you’ve still interacted and shaped Kaaras in one way or another. Thank you for approaching us, wanting to RP with Kaaras, sticking through all of the ooc posts, his (and my) moods and dark days, and just loving him as much as I love and care for him. <3 Thank you anyone who has sent us memes, anons, follows, art, ANYTHING. Thank you for merely interacting with us as a whole.

Of course, what would a milestone be without some shout outs. So in, no particular order, here goes:

The Inner Circle:

For the people I have long term Rped with and have made spectacular friends with. <3 These are people who have either put up with so much of my shit that they belong here because they deserve to or because they’ve simply made RPing here such a joy and left a huge impact on myself and Kaaras. Let’s be honest, we also talk nearly every day XD

@elfroot-and-lightning - Honestly, where would Kaaras be without Ezra? Where would I be without you as my special friend and who I absolutely adore and love. <3 You are one of the very first people I got to RP with here on this blog, and I remember when Ezra was on your main blog, and I was so excited to RP with another qunari. Ezra was one of the very first muses to get so close to Kaaras to open up and talk about things that he’d never spoken about with anyone else. Ezra was a calm to him that he needed, and to be honest, because of them, we became so much closer to one another. Where we were too shy to talk to one another, our muses were able to fill in the gaps, and I can never regret that. You managed to settle yourself deep within my heart and when I say that I love you, I absolutely mean that. As whatever you will have me as *snug* You’re a kind, loving and gentle person, and talking to you always makes my day just that little bit brighter. Tbh, I still feel a little giddy when I think about my feelings for you XD

Kaazra is life has become an official tag, and to this day, Kaazra is still my OTP for these two in an RP setting. I will never not love these special two. You’re a fantastic writer, and even though you don’t RP as much as you used to, you’re still one of my favourite Rpers here and forever will be. *smooch*

@sahlintalas - I don’t think you understand (yes you do who am I kidding) how much I love that someone can GET me in a cultural perspective and thus in a very personal and lifestyle perspective as well. Honestly, it’s SO refreshing getting to talk to someone who understand my lingo, the fact that dunking your biscuits in tea is a highly important role in society and all of our other ridiculously non American traits. XD

I’m still slightly creeped out, even if amused that we have so much in common and that we are literally clones. That we look alike, that we share the same names and everything else. It’s amazing and yet so fucking weird that I love it to pieces.

You have become one of my closest friends here in the DARP community and out of that as well. It’s not just the RP that I love with you, it’s getting to talk to you almost every day as well that it’s become quite a norm for me and that I miss it when we don’t talk. Sahlin has become such a significant part of Kaaras, and honestly as someone who understand how real a muse can be, I definitely need that in my life.

You just GET me. And that’s so damn important. Even when we don’t agree, you still say that it’s nothing wrong with me, and even that the world needs people like me, who give so many chances, etc. And that’s important to me, to know that just because we don’t deal with things the same, that I still have your respect as a friend and as a person.

For one, I love ALL of your muses, yes, even Martine although Kaaras still is iffy as fuck on her and they haven’t even interacted XD. Your muses are so unique to themselves, and not a single one of them is the same, they are very much their own persons.

With Herah and Sahlin, I’ve actually learned a lot about Kaaras (especially his more dominant side with Sahlin). Seriously, I always thought that Kaaras was a major subby until he and Sahlin got together, and I realised just how wrong I was. XD

Our muses have grown with each other, and that’s something I love to see. Thank you for putting up with Kaaras’ moods and my bad days as well. You’ve been a great friend to me over the year that we’ve known each other. <3

@aylenlavellan - Although we’ve been friends, or at least known each other, for quite a few years, this fandom absolutely brought us closer than we’ve ever been. I was always a distant admirer of your art over on deviantART and then following you over on tumblr we talked a little more. I am SO happy that you made Aylen’s blog official, and I am so thankful that you gave into my pining for you to make her blog xDD (sorry I am the worst lol), but I have no regrets!

You’re a sweet, kind, gentle soul and one of the nicest people I’ve ever met. I ADORE Kaylen to pieces and they are honestly one of the fluffiest and happiest ships I have going on here. We don’t love you just for the ships, though, we love you and your muse because you’re wonderful people, and you’re a fantastic writer and artist. Whenever I see that you’ve replied to a thread of mine, I always get a little bit giddy.

Also, never forget rubba dub dub in the tub--I had to mention that :D Because it’s fucking legit and it’s still the best thread title TO THIS DAY!

Seriously, though, you’re a major sweetheart, and I don’t think you realise how important Aylen is to Kaaras’ happiness. His childhood was taken away from him when he was just 12, and with Aylen, he feels like he gets to relive something he never got to have as a growing man. A childhood and youthfulness is important to remember, and Aylen gives that to him, with the balance of a sturdy and professional adult life as well. They’re perfect together, and even in their tough times, there is still something so HAPPY about this ship. In turn, their happiness is absolutely infectious and I find myself happy for them. I love them, they’re adorable!

@tal-fucking-vashoth - Omg, you haven’t even had this blog for two months and I ADORE you to pieces. When I first approached you, I was very shy and nervous and I thought you’d absolutely hate Kaaras (yes I’m just as anxious as everyone else is on tumblr apparently XD). But we hit it off really quickly, and even though it’s been so little time, I already know that you’ve got my back in tough times, and that’s important for someone who’s barely known each other for a few months. XDDD

You’re fun, you’re chill, and I do feel like you’re a very understanding person. And then there is your Bull. WOW, as if your follower count can’t prove it to you already, but you write an amazing, deep Bull who is full of confusion and struggles and LOVE. He’s a giant teddy bear, and tbh, let me tell you as someone who’s spent 2 years in the DARP community and pining for some Bull action, yours is absolutely one of my favourite takes--and yes, even with the absolutely terribull puns. XD

I really do look forward to getting to plot with you and becoming your friend. <3 We met on a very... awkward basis considering everything that happened with me and my dash all of a sudden becoming such a negative space, but your Bull definitely was a light in the darkness there, and thank you for putting up with my rot. You’re amazing already!

@tavis-of-bannorn - I feel like our muses really struggled at the start, and now look at them. They are being really fluffy and adorable, and honestly, the time that it took for them to open up was definitely one of the longest for Kaaras, but it was well worth the wait, and it absolutely makes these two realistic.

Tavis is an amazing, in depth character with a heart of poetry and symbolism. What I love most about Tavis is that there is no muse like Tavis, Tavis is so unique in his own way, even his own aesthetics, that he really stands out from the crowd. I know I’ve told you a million times that I think he’s the hottest elf in Thedas, but we don’t RP with Tavis because of what he looks like.

We RP with Tavis because of his depth of character, because of how well he’s been thought out and how much of a person he is, and an individual to himself. We Rp because Rping with Tavis is honestly something that I can’t even predict with him, and it’s sort of like a lucky dip every time Kaaras is with him, he’s left wanting that little bit more, and I’m left wanting to know what will HAPPEN, because Tavis is the kind of character you WANT to ask questions about. He draws you in in such a way where he’s never boring, and he’s always got something to say.

You’ve been such a delight to talk to and befriend along the way, you’re so chill and understanding, and I love that, and you’ve been there for me when Kaaras was struggling and going through some serious shit. Also, your taste in music is fucking awesome, because let’s face it, it’s the same as mine P:

@thosewhospeak - Omg, can I just say how much I LOVE KAARAS AND TAMA!!!? I mean, for one, Kaaras has NEVER had a rival before that’s actually been enjoyable for the mod to RP. And that’s how it SHOULD be. No guilt tripping, no manipulation for them to like one another, just pure letting our muses be themselves and enjoying their shitfest on the sidelines. XD

I absolutely love their dynamic and the internal struggles that the both of them have because of one another. This is what a rival SHOULD be, and you play Tama so strictly and in line that it’s amazing to watch her be so blind and stubborn and yet also struggle a little within herself.

Rping with you in general is such a delight and so enjoyable, and it’s so fun getting to explore this side of Kaaras. Thank you SO much for making Tama and having her simply be herself. I know some people may have caved under the pressure and feared people might not like their muse because of what she is and her beliefs, but you’ve done a fantastic job with keeping her in character and true to herself, and that includes making her grow and learn as well.

Seriously, I adore her, she’s got to be my favourite Qunari (Qun) character out there. I fucking love her to pieces. <3 You’ve also always been there to ask if I was okay when I was having a bad moment, and I want to thank you for that. Chatting with you is always enjoyable, and I love bouncing ideas off one another with our terrible muses. XDDD

Inquisition:

I want to throw some special shout outs to the following people. We either admire you from afar or RP with you and are just getting to know both you and your muse enough that they’ve left a special little mark in mine and Kaaras’ heart, and we hope to continue Rping with you and want to say a special thank you for Rping with us! <3 And hopefully more in the future!

Some of you are long term RP partners and friends of mine, and I want you to know that you are special and that we adore you to absolute pieces! <3 I honestly want to write little notes about ALL of you, but this is already getting so damn long that I’m afraid I’ll be a broken record >.< Just know that if your name is below, that you’re awesome, and if you’re not following any of these guys, then GO AND DO IT! :D

Support:

To EVERYONE! To anyone who has followed Kaaras, interacted with him, IMed me, asked him anons, sent us memes, liked our video posts, my art, ANYTHING. I want to say a HUGE thank you to every single one of you amazing souls out there!

We wouldn’t be here if it weren’t for all of you. Even the shy people who watch from afar and are too scared to approach. We still love you! Also don’t be shy, we’re dorks :D I promise.

Seriously, though, this blog helped me through some seriously bad times, and the community as a whole has been overwhelmingly amazing! Thank you anyone and everyone who has interacted with Kaaras over the last two years, even if you didn’t stay around--thank you either way!

Each and every one of you had left a mark in our hearts. Thank you for being so supportive of us, and I hope for many more years and getting to know a lot more of you and RP with you guys!

Thank you so much for everything. <3 The Inquisition would be nothing without it’s people. :)

#ooc #off the ram #2 years #appreciation post #2 year anniversary #(( I'm panicking a little because I feel like I'm forgetting people??? DX sorry if I have ))

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