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carriagelamp · 4 months

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I don't know what to say here this month. February, eh? Hate February, the Thursday of months, I'm just clinging to sanity while I wait for spring. Here are the books that helped me through what is basically a month of overcast skies and fucking winter rain.

Candy Color Paradox v6

Candy Color Paradox is a series I’ve been reading for years now and I’ve really enjoyed how the relationship in this one has progressed over that time. It started somewhat similar to how you’d expect a yaoi manga to start — lots of tension, drama, smut, and some light antagonism between the two main characters who both work at the same weekly magazine. But it’s eased into something that’s really quite genuine. This most recent volume focused entirely on moving in together and all the little complications and insecurities that arise because of that.

Circus of Fear

A 1980s D&D choose your own adventure novel so the quality is exactly what you would expect, but at the very least it was a fun little diversion. Doing a CYOA book with a friend can honestly be a blast, they just feel so silly, and the setting of a magical, vaguely sinister circus is always an enjoyable backdrop. We managed to get a good ending on the second try! So yay! I'd honestly like to read it again and try some of the other routes that also sounding intriguing.

Dungeon Meshi // Delicious in Dungeon v1

Me and my girlfriend started watching Dungeon Meshi because we’d seen so much about it on tumblr lately and wow. Just wow. It really is doing something special and we’re completely enamoured. Since we’re waiting for new episodes, I picked up the first book so we could compare it and the show — it’s really impressive how closely they align! And the art is really lovely, it stands out and not just for it's food glamour shots.

For those who haven't been seduced into watching the anime yet: Dungeon Meshi / Delicious in Dungeon is a DND-style parody in which the adventuring party needs to enter the monster-filled dungeon to save one of their companions who got eaten by a red dragon. They need to get to her and revive her before she entirely digested. However, to hasten their quest (and indulge one of their member’s strange obsessions) they begin to hunt and eat the monsters that fill the dungeon instead of trying to bring food in from the outside. This is 80% a cooking anime and 20% a comedic adventure anime. Book or show, doesn’t matter which, you should give it a try if you haven’t.

Down Among the Sticks and Bones

I really enjoyed the first book of the series, Every Heart A Doorway, and was excited when I found out there was a prequel about Jack and Jill and the world they visited. This can either be read as a prequel or it works fairly well as a stand-alone novella; the story is about twin sisters who have always been forced to fill very precise societal roles by their parents. One afternoon, they stumble across a magical door in the bottom of a chest and venture down into the sinister world of the moors where one sister is taken in by a vampire lord and the other by a mad scientist. The story looks at how the sisters grow and change when apart from each other and their controlling parents. Excellent story, the language is just so enticing.

Midnight Sun

My brother has been watching all the Twilight movies with a couple of his friends. Listening to him bitch about Jacob like it was 2007 reawakened something in me, so after laughing myself sick I had to go and relisten to Midnight Sun. Still genuinely and unironically love this book, it’s pure trash but by god it's my trash. I’m a simple soul.

Odder

I’ve been hearing great things about this book, and it’s hard to go wrong with Katherine Applegate so I was excited to finally read it. This is a book written entirely in free verse poetry about an orphaned otter and her experiences being rescued by the Monterey Bay Aquarium. It’s inspired by a true story (several true stories, actually!) and it's very worth picking up even if you don't usually go for poetry. It's charming and reads very easily.

Old-Fashioned Cupcake

A middle-aged salaryman is feeling worn down by the humdrum nature of his life, which is filled mostly with work these days. This manga kicks off with his coworker suggests that if he wants to deal with the feelings of boredom and aging, then he needs to do something to shake up his life: so he suggests that they “act like a pair of teenage girls” and go to a fancy new pancake shop just because it seems fun, never mind that it’s not something grown men are supposed to do. This manga ended up being pretty darn cute -- it was slow and compassionate and loving -- and it managed to convince me to buy its sequel.

Professor Calculus: Science’s Forgotten Genius

A ridiculous little book I bought on impulse that was nevertheless a lot of fun to read. It’s a tribute to Cuthbert Calculus, celebrating the 80th anniversary of his first appearance in Tintin. It dives into some of the inspirations that went into the character, and also lovingly and cheekily explores some "facts" we know about Calculus as a person… and wildly extrapolates more from there. It was a cute little read for anyone who’s a fan of the series and wants something a little extra.

Return to Oz

I recently rewatched this movie and maintain that I like it more than the original film, sorry. It made me decide to grab the novelization because I’m always a sucker for a novelization <3 This one was pretty solid too, it actually included details that were left out of the film and improve the stories overall cohesion which is always the marker of a good novelization.

Return to Oz takes place several months after the original film, when Aunty Em and Uncle Henry are trying to build a new house and get the farm back in order before winter. Concerned by Dorothy’s continued belief in Oz and her increased insomnia, Aunty Em decides to take her to a doctor who offers healing through electroshock therapy. Yeah, it’s exactly as fucking creepy as it sounds… You get a scary aslyum, a sinister head nurse, being strapped to a hospital gurney, and new baddies that scared the bejeezus out of me as a kid. Anyway, before she can be electrocuted, Dorothy manages to escape back to Oz where she discovers her friends are in dire need of help. It’s like Alice: Madness Returns but from Disney. Go watch this movie.

She Drives Me Crazy

I had very mixed feelings about this book. It’s about high school basketball player, Scottie, who has suffered a bad breakup with her girlfriend who moved schools to play on the opposing basketball team. Things go from bad to worse when she gets into a car accident with her arch-nemesis, the cheerleader Irene. One things lead to another and bada bing bada boom we have a fake dating scheme so that Scottie can get back at her ex.

This book had some genuinely fun moments (I’m always a sucker for a fake dating scheme, and the characters were reasonably fun) but it’s biggest failing is one that I’ve seen more than I like in current queer lit. It just tries so. fucking. hard. to be unproblematic. Like yeah, it’s great to see healthy relationships but it was SO explicit about it. So much therapy speak, way more than feels natural for a conversation or internal monolgue, especially when they’re in high emotions. The “banter” was very scripted. It was a book that felt like it had a laugh track. And while the ending was satisfying enough, it was also… I don’t know. Anticlimactic. We just spent so long tying everything up in a perfectly neat little bow that it really just strolled to an ending that was obvious from a mile away.

Like look, I get it, we want this to be squeaky clean and beyond reproach, but I have NEVER entered a fake dating story hoping that everyone was going to be really sensible and respectful and level-headed. Fake dating is the slapstick of the romance world, I want some Shakespearean level bullshit, please don’t try to gussy it up for me. Gonna go and rewatch 10 Things I Hate About You or something just to feel things again. Or maybe pop over to AO3, your average fic writer at least understands that when I say fake dating I mean I want something absolutely fucking unhinged and filled to the gill with mutual pining.

So yeah, if you want a sports-based high school sapphic romance: it’s not a bad book. It went down easy, I liked listening to it in the mornings when I needed something light before work. Some bits I even quite enjoyed. But it’s not going to rock your world.

Shuna’s Journey

Well, if nothing else you can really, definitely tell this was done by Hayoa Miyazaki. I’m honestly not really sure how I felt about it. The art was beautiful, and the story was pure undiluted Miyazaki through and through. The narrative was very nice. The story and message was poignant. It was a nice book. I can’t say it’s stuck very heavily in my mind, but I enjoyed reading it. It felt like a precursor to Princess Monoke / Nausicaa, perhaps?

The Witches

The story of one child and his grandmother needing to contend with witches. Not fairytale witches. Real witches. And all their horrible, child-hating ways. One thing I will always love about Dahl is that when he wants to write about something Horrible, nothing will stop him. His villains are truly villainous and the witches are a prime example of that! I loved the description of the witches and their horrible, sinister deeds, especially in the first half of the book. This sure is Child Murder: The Novel! The ending was absolutely not what I was expecting, and I appreciate that. Such a bizarre book.

#queer lit #hayao miyazaki #dungeon meshi #tintin #twilight #delicious in dungeon #dnd #d&d #book review #book reviews #chatter

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nightmareonfilmstreet · 7 years

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Happy 70th Birthday Stephen King: The 10 Best Horror Adaptations

New Post has been published on https://nofspodcast.com/happy-70th-stephen-king-heres-10-best/

Happy 70th Birthday Stephen King: The 10 Best Horror Adaptations

Today our father who art in horror Stephen King turns 70! And I for one thank Maturin, that great big turtle in the sky, every single day that Stephen was born. Just ask yourself “Where would we be without him?” In fact, what would horror be without him?

Stephen King was born in 1947 in Portland Maine. He sold his first professional short story “The Glass Floor” In 1967 while working in an industrial laundry. In 1971, King started teaching high school English, while at nights he continued to write short stories and work on his novels. In 1974 Doubleday published Carrie. The resulting income allowed him to leave his teaching job to write full-time. Over the next 40 plus years King went on to shape the horror landscape by releasing many genre defining novels including The Shining, Cujo, IT, Salem’s Lot and many more. King has amassed sales of over 350 million books to date, and thankfully isn’t showing any signs of slowing down.

Stephen King is also responsible for some of the most horrifying and nightmare inducing movies ever made. Many of his novels have been adapted into some truly iconic and recognisable horror movies in modern cinema; The Shining, It, Carrie, Christine, and countless others. To celebrate his birthday, a sacred day on my horror calendar, lets countdown my our 10 Stephen King horror movie adaptations.

Selection Criteria

a) Only Horror Movies: – I will only be selecting Stephen’s scary sh*t, so there will be no Green Mile, Shawshank Redemption or Stand By Me. We’re a horror site.

b) The rankings are mine, and are based on how much I liked the film- Not the scope of the cinematography or the maturity of the score blah blah bah. My list. My criteria.

c) I have only ranked movies I have seen. For all I know, Children of the Corn V: Fields of Terror could be the greatest movie ever based within the King-verse, but I haven’t seen it so it’s not on the list!

And without further ado, The List!

10 – Carrie (1976)

Hi Carrie, rough night?

Carrie White is a shy and sheltered girl, who after a particularly cruel prank unleashes her deadly telekinetic powers to get vengeance at her high school prom.

Let’s face it. This film is bleak. Sissy Spacek plays awkward so well that you grimace at her every interaction. Add to this the fact that she has clearly been systematically domineered and abused by her religious mother whom I’m pretty sure is the most evil character since Joan Crawford in Mommie Dearest. In fact the most uplifting moment in Carrie is when Mrs. White gets graphically and ironically killed; impaled on her own symbolism.

Anyway, Carrie kills everyone and lives happily ever after or something.

For me this film boils down to three scenes ranked by how much they terrified me as an 8-year-old boy.

3. The prom scene = mildly freaking out.

2. The hand out of the grave scene = big jump scare made me close my little eyes.

1. The pig murder scene = didn’t sleep for a week. Every time I closed my eyes i heard that poor piggy crying.

9 – Secret Window (2004)

Wait, what?

Uh oh, early controversy! This probably won’t be a popular choice, but I loved this movie, and remember: My criteria.

Secret window is a psychological thriller about an author named Mort. Recently divorced, he moves to his upstate New York cabin to work on his writing. While there he meets John Shooter, who accuses him of plagiarism and proceeds to torment him seeking justice.

Johnny Depp and John Turturro are easily two of my favourite actors named John. I will eat anything these two dish up and probably ask for more. Their chemistry really carries this film and Turturro’s accent is just plain fun. The mystery aspect of this movie however is the weak point and by the time the twist is revealed, you’ve probably already guessed it. But the way it’s handled is so entertaining that I didn’t begrudge it at all.

8 – The Dead Zone (1983)

Whoa Chris, Your sex is on fire!

5 years after a car accident leaves him in a coma, Johnny Smith (Christopher Walken) discovers he has the ability to see people’s secrets through any physical contact. With some deeply unsettling visualizations of his premonitions, we follow Johnny as he attempts to navigate his “Dead Zone” and prevent the untimely deaths of those around him.

If you need more incentive? (ahem, CHRISTOPHER WALKEN) it is also directed by David ‘freaking’ Cronenberg! Don’t even bother with the rest of this list, if you haven’t seen The Dead Zone. Cancel your plans for the evening and watch it now.

7 – 1408 (2007)

Should’ve got the suite upgrade.

*This movie has two endings and while both versions are good, I only have eyes for the darker ending.

Mike Enslin (John Cusack), a paranormal debunker decides to stay in the Dolphin Hotel’s infamous room 1408. Not long after checking in Mike learns that the stories surrounding room 1408 may not be as embellished as he first believed.

SPOILER ALERT! this hotel room is really f**king haunted! After he ignores the hotel manager’s (Samuel L Jackson) extremely convincing and rational speech, it doesn’t take Mike very long to realize his monumental error. This movie is tense and unnerving from start to finish.

6 – Christine (1983)

Dope ride bro!

A nerdy teenager (Arnie) buys a vintage car (Christine) that has supernatural abilities and a sinister, violent nature. As Arnie’s obsession with Christine develops, his friends notice that the car’s not so pleasant nature is starting to influence its owner.

John Carpenter directs a movie about a kick ass red car, that actually seems possessed by a demon, but don’t let this seemingly campy premise put you off. This movie is awesome as Christine is evil. The badass Red Plymouth Fury owns every scene it’s in with its larger than life presence, deep rumbling voice and inherent menace.

5 – Pet Sematary (1989)

I’m never making waffles again.

Behind a family home, in Maine, there is an old cemetery that holds the secret to life and death. When Tragedy strikes the Creed family, the lure of this power becomes too tempting to ignore.

Pet Sematary (spelt wrong on purpose) is a movie about a family who move into a new house that’s on a surprising busy road. Soon after they lose their small child in a tragic accident. Louis (Dale Mikiff) learns of the old pet cemetery and it’s apparent ability to bring the dead back to life (yay!) but they also seem to come back a little evil (boo!). This movie is full of fantastic nightmare fuel. I still cringe every time I think of sweet little, creepy AF child, slicing open poor old Jud’s Achilles tendon.

4 – IT (2017)

So much happiness in one place…

The newest film on the list, and it was only through sheer force of will it wasn’t number 1. For those of you who live under a rock, IT is about a group of kids called ‘The Losers Club’ who are taunted by a monster in the form of an extremely disturbing turn-of-the-century era clown.

This movie is so much fun. Sure, its full of terror. Sure, I haven’t slept in a week. But, it captures the innocence and humour of being a kid so perfectly, it almost made me wish I grew up in Derry….except, of course- for the evil clown trying to eat everyone.

3 – The Mist (2007)

Oh God, no!

You guessed it- This one is about a strange Mist that descends on a small town (probably in, Oh I don’t know- Maine). Along with the unexplained weather pattern come terrible monsters that pick off the town folk one-by-one. No one knows where it came from or how to get rid of it.

We spend the majority of this film in a grocery store, where the monsters outside are not necessarily the biggest threat. A great creature feature, The Mist is fun, action packed and dramatic (especially that ending!). Actually, maybe you should just press stop once they drive into the mist near the end, because the last 5 minutes is so dark, it will definitely break your heart.

2 – Creepshow 2 (1987)

UNCONFIRMED photo of Miley Cyrus at the kids choice awards.

I’m sure this one needs no description, but Creepshow 2 is a horror anthology of tales based on Stephen King stories. The first segment follows a cigar-store Native American statue coming to life to avenge the death of the shop owner and his wife. The Raft features a group of sexy teens travel to a secluded lake to swim and have fun. Problem is there is an evil organism living in the lake that is hungry for some nubile flesh. The final installment follows a woman who hits a hitchhiker with her car and decides to flee the scene, but the victim isn’t inclined to remain dead.

This was my favourite movie growing up! A brilliant collection of twisted, and timeless vignettes. The wrap around animation is a lot of fun too, telling the story of little Billy and his bullies.

1 – The Shining (1980)

You could’ve just knocked, Jack.

There is no other number one.

In The Shining, Jack Torrance (Jack Nicholson) takes a job as winter caretaker at the isolated Overlook Hotel in Colorado, hoping to cure his writer’s block. Psychic premonitions plague his son Danny. As Jack’s writing goes nowhere, young Danny’s visions become more intense. Jack discovers the hotel has dark secrets and he begins to unravel, terrorizing his family as he spirals downward into madness.

The pamphlet for the Overlook Hotel should just read: Overlook Hotel, where a bunch of jerk ghosts live. Poor Danny, his “Shining” ability along with a childish love of exploration, open him up to some serious spectral harassment. This movie builds tension to perfection. In fact one of my favourite characters in the film is Dick Halloran. When Dick is on-screen there is usually a slight respite from the heavy tension.

This movie is a classic that every horror fan needs to see at least once.. no, twice.

Honorable Mentions

Misery, Creepshow, Silver Bullet and Cujo

Thanks for making my life more entertaining Stephen! And please, keep the nightmares coming! Let us know in the comments below your top Horror Adaptations from Stephen King!

#1408 #carrie #christine #creepshow 2 #it #pet semetary #secret window #Stephen King #the dead zone #the mist #the shining

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