ahh thank u for tagging me @littlechillis !! 💗

last song: it’s unreleased (and it’s a crime that it isn’t) but it was yes to heaven by lana del rey. loml, namesake, etc etc 🤧

last show: im so bad at finding new stuff to watch but rn its 9-1-1 and it’s pretty good tbf. (does aon count ??)

currently watching: rewatching gilmore girls and b99. are we surprised.

currently reading: about two hundred pages into the secret history. 10/10 so far, so so good

current obsession: ive gotten back into cooking/baking !! waiting on a lemon cake rn while i type this 😗

tagging (no pressure <3): @togeqii @wvldorf @lovely-leclerc 💞💞

Hi this is not Cloti related but do you have an analysis on Cloud's relationship with Jessie? Particularly during chapter 4 after the bike mini-game? Cloud looks worried

Sorry this took a while, Nonny, I get a bit done in from life lol

So Cloud and Jessie, the girl who absolutely has no issue throwing herself at our boi. It's pretty good for him because at least he gets used to girls being all over him and helps him make his mind up just who he wants to show attention to #cough# Tifa #cough#

Ok, spoiler warning for ppl who haven’t played – do I still need to do this? Eh ok, (I tag FF7R spoilers as final fantasy 7 remake spoilers) and it’s gonna be smol.

Also, this is one person’s interpretation of the scene, so if you disagree that’s cool and we’ll agree to disagree.

You’re also gonna have to excuse the janky quality on some of the screens, I’m grabbing them from Youtube and it’s frustrating af trying to get the exact moment I want.

Please check my master post to see if I've already covered your question, thanx

Let's mosey!

Recap time!

Chapter four and our reluctant hero has been roped into help the avalanche trio go topside. Problem is they missed the last train and have to take their bikes instead. Cue a few problems with security and a meeting with the master of extra, Roche. Once that's out of the way, Jessie rewards Cloud depending on your expertise.

This scene has 3 optional endings.

Quick aside, I find it hilarious that Cloud literally tells Jessie to shut up and get off the bike when she starts annoying him during the minigame.

Ok, ending one. The bad ending where Jessie's beyond disappointed with you. These are hard to pick apart because a lot of Cloud's attention is on the road, so the usual microexpressions are even harder to catch.

But look what I caught anyway! Check that brow quirking like “excuse you?” and it's accurate because he says he's a great driver in the next moment. I really love going over these scenes and spotting all these because they build such a clearer picture of Cloud is as a person. And clearly boi doesn't like his driving ability being questioned, especially seeing how Jessie didn't do squat to help him, aside from being annoying lol

Well, Cloud does seem a bit worried here if the frown is anything to go by. I'm guessing it's because this is the bad ending and as much as he's not into Jessie, he doesn't like people having a bad impression of him. He doesn't like the idea that he's not thought of as the big badass capable merc in all ways, so this could well be hints of that self-doubt coming through. 

Although, after watching the other two endings, this is the only time we see this typical cycle of expressions he does before concluding something. This is what I like to call a real!Cloud inner debate. Cloud often goes through a lot of quick expressions or his eyes dart around. Since they can’t do that here, we get the former. Judging from the frown at the end, he’s not impressed with his own performance and likely berating himself for not being good enough. Again. Someone call a therapist for Cloud, plz.

And moving onto the second ending, which you get if you did ok on the minigame. These are making me wonder which one's canon. I don't think it's the kiss and actually, it may well be the bad one since that's where we get the most facial expression and close ups from Cloud compared to the others where we see the back of his head or a mid range view.

For this scene we only get one close up of Cloud's face and it's pretty much SOLDIER!Cloud and then the next time he speaks you can't even see his face. This is the kind of thing that hints to me which optional scene is the one we're supposed to be getting for Cloud's narrative story (and that I actually forgot about for my playthrough as Cloud lol I got the middle one because I kinda suck at fighting Roche, but I try).

Yeah, so a lot of sighing from Cloud at Jessie, the annoyed kind. I mean, we know she kinda irritates him, but he likes her too, just not in a romantic way. You also don't see his reaction to her “I might be falling after all” line and only hear him say “hmm?” Then when his face is next in frame it's full on SOLDIER, so there's really nothing to pick apart.

And now the good ending where you get a kiss from Jessie! Ooh lala!!

CLOUD'S FACE HERE! OMG I'M DYING! He's such a boi in a man sometimes! Adorable af! Definitely never even had a kiss on the cheek before in his life and look at the ott reaction to it!

WAIT! Wait! I've seen that face before somewhere!

YES OMG I'M DYING! It's the same reaction as the one to Aerith's best dress! OMG!

I'm sorry, I genuinely need a minute....

Ok, so...looool ok....I can be sensible here....maybe loool erm, the unrealistic expression on Cloud's face shows that it's unlikely this is the outcome that happened. But, on the other hand if the red dress happened then so did this kiss, so choose your poison lol

omg I love the devs for this! I really do! This is hilarious! I can’t even look at these two pics without laughing!

Ok, sensible. Kinda. 

And last one where Cloud looks grim af as usual, but with a hint of “what do I do about this?” because Jessie kissed him and he's not interested and he has no clue what to do with women and likely wants to reject her, but still doesn't know what to do with women, so you can see the dilemma he's in lol

It doesn't help when Jessie tries calling him out on it and he has this tiny frown in response. His attention is split between trying to talk to her and driving, so it's no wonder he's not that talkative and abrupt. If I wanted to speculate I'd say if he actually had an interest in her as more than friends he'd have tried harder. He had his little chat with Marle already, so he's not opposed to putting himself out if he wants to. He doesn't here, but he's still trying to concentrate, so that could explain the lack of attention, but still, Jessie kissed him and he got scowly.

Conclusion.

Well, I for one didn't remember there were 3 of these endings – each with their own remix of Jessie's theme, just like another 3 optional scenes with a remixed theme lol the parallels are killing me!

The music for each should also hint at which one is the narrative canon – I'm useless with music analysis so bear with me. The first one does sound like it fits with the other girls' themes, so very simple, easy to listen to in the background and memorable in its way. The second is louder and has more techno notes in, making it seem less like a background piece and more in your face. The last one has vocalists and is a full on pop song! No way is that right lol

For two of the three of these we don't really get much in the way of Cloud's face. It could be put down to him driving, but we get a couple of very good close ups on the bad one with varied expressions, one of which definitely goes towards his personal motivation to be thought of as a hero. Having people point out his faults would cause that kind of reaction.

The second result really doesn't have much in the way of facial expression and Cloud's voice is brisk because he's driving, so I can't really say much about it one way or the other. It’s the one I get the most when I’m playing and it’s kinda blah. Like your standard minigame pass screen. That probably didn’t help.

The last one is hilarious! That's such an exaggerated expression! Do people really believe Cloud pulls that kind of pikachu face on the regular?! I legit needed to stop because I couldn't stop laughing! That's not Cloud or real!Cloud, that's just bloody funny! Also, Cloud doesn't seem too impressed by the result if that last minute frown is any indication. He doesn't want Jessie kissing him, even though it's probably the first time any girl has kissed him – poor sweet summer child lol

If I had to make a guess at the narrative canon I'd say number one, because we know for a fact that Cloud hasn't been driving for years. Boi gets motion sickness ffs! And when did he ever drive a motorcycle? I'd definitely buy that being one of the first times he's ever driven, which would explain why he did so poorly and why he has multiple varied expressions in that result.

isle kingdom au

so i’ve had this idea for an AU for a little while, but i don’t wanna actually write anything for it until i’m done w/ my current descendants wips, but i also wanna talk about it lol so ig im making a post? please send me asks about it i wanna talk about it.... anyway

**tw for child abuse and semi-graphic descriptions of violence.

basically the premise of the au is that even though he tried to get it passed at first, ben never went through with pulling the vks off the isle. he kept meaning too, but it just kept being pushed to the back of his list of priorities bc he was so busy w/ being king and never happened 

so bc of this, the core 4 stayed on the isle and never got off it. if you’ve read the stuff in my keep them close series u probably have a better idea of my hc of the isle, but the basics of it are that 1) most of the parents are really bad and abusive + the conditions are disgusting 2) none of the kids are really evil and 3) the vks are all kinda frenimes/rivals and will work together to keep eachother alive even if they act like they hate eachother or will even hurt eachother

so, in the ‘canon’ timeline before going to auradon the core 4 are a gang and slowly gaining power. they’re already the top of the vk gangs and are like gaining on some of the adult ones.

bc they never go to auradon, they just kinda keep doing what they already are and gain more and more power. but, as they gain power their parents start becoming afraid of them and acting like more abusive in attempts to keep the core 4 under their control 

ok bare w/ me for this next bit bc it’s gonna sound real ooc for like a sec then make sense

so, as they’re gaining power and their parents are haveing more and more trouble controlling them their parents are becoming more and more violent.

im not sure on the order yet, but basically cruella, jafar, eq, and malifacent all do something like really really bad to their respective kid, so one of the other core 4 kills them bc like. yeah. 

i have some vauge ideas of what each of them could have done and i don’t really know if i want to say them or even use them tbh bc they’re like.... bad, like real bad. which they kinda have to be, you know? bc like.... none of the core 4 would turn to killing if they didn’t have a real good reason, and their parents continuing the abuse that they always have woulden’t be enough, so the parents would have to do something really really bad for one of the others to justify killing them 

its important to mention that none of them kill their own parent. it’s always one of the other 4, im not sure who kills who just yet, but none of them kill their own parent. They’re saved from their parents by each other and they never really have any confrontation with their parents (which will change l8r 👀👀, let me explain)

Even tho they didn’t kill their own parents, everyone kinda assumed they did in order to take their places/gain power. A handful of their friends know the real story, but it’s mostly kept under wraps and it’s like general “knowledge” that they killed their parents for power. They’re not really hiding it or anything, I mean they did still each kill one of the 4 most powerful villains so it’s not like anyone is gonna be less afraid if they knew the truth. ppl just make assumptions and never really question them and they just let ppl think what they do

So bc their parents are dead and they let everyone assume they killed their own parent they very easily climb up the ranks and end up in charge of the isle bc atp they’re seen as the most ruthless/evil/powerful

So now that they’re in charge of the isle they start like..... actually making it a livable place. Ofc at first they try to make a version of Carlos’s machine to break the barrier, but they can’t get it to work so he just modifys it to steal magic from the barrair for them to use. (Another idea stolen from my keep them close series but like I like the idea lol)

And when I say they make it a livable place I mean they start doing stuff like building water purifiers, making like safe houses, establishing some kind of working economy, taking control of the barge drop offs and how everything is distributed, fixing broken electricity, etc etc

A lot of what they do is based off of Carlos’s machines and designs, which like obvi other ppl are helping him gather materials and for and build, since he has power bc he’s like one of the ppl in charge. And he like teaches other ppl how to do what he does and fix anything that goes wrong

Evie kinda puts herself in charge of setting up like medical centers + homes for kids and stuff. Also some kinda way to grow food. B4 they’re in charge nothing can really grow but they use the magic they steal from the barrier to make stuff grow. And evie can use it to make like lots of healing items and such

Jay ends up mostly in charge of like collecting and distribution of their recourses. At first like the barge is kinda a hugeeee problem to deal with bc ppl are fighting over the like moldy food and destroyed clothes and stuff. But eventually they get it organized and have stuff sent to the respective place it should, like clothes and scrap fabric are sent to a place that repairs and sells them, parts and electronics are sent to Carlos or his helpers, etc

Other minor vks like Celia, dizzy, the sea three, Diego, etc are all in this two but this is already really long so just know they’re like helping and like pretty high ranking/highly regarded. Send me an ask with questions please

Mal is kinda regarded as the ultimate leader/queen of the isle ig even though the other 3 have basically the same amount of power. Mostly bc her job ends up being keeping the adults who dislike them inline and keeping their power as heads of the isle

Most ppl are just kinda chill w/ them being in charge, especially a lot of the ppl who were banished for minor crimes. A few of the adult villains try to fight them and end up dead lol, and anyone caught doing especially bad things, like r*pe, hurting someone they shouldn’t have, being a child abuser, etc will end up killed by mal or one of the others. They don’t kill u for like every crime obviously only the like inexcusable ones. Stuff like stealing or mental illness or w/e they basically just help you work through

They’re aren’t any like real laws ig but they deal with issues as they go and give harsh punishments if needed. It serves to keep themselves seen as strong/evil/powerful despite all the good they do and helps keep others too afraid to challenge them. Like frollo isn’t going to challenge them if Ursula tried the same thing and got killed. (The fact that she abused uma and her siblings obviously had nothing to do with that,,,,,,,,,,,)

So yeah! They basically turned the isle into a inhabitable place in the years that they spent as its leaders, and it functions as its own kinda kingdom despite its harsh and confusing laws/rules

But we ain’t done yet, lol

Basically everything I’ve just explained is.... mostly backstory? Kinda? It’s the type of thing where you slowly find out about all this stuff while they actual story goes on, but I figured it’d be less confusing to explain it first :3

So the Actual story starts a few years after when Ben originally was supposed to take the vks off the isle. He, all the other princess/princes he want to school with, the core 4, the sea 3, etc are all in their mid to early 20s.

Auradon has basically no clue what’s the deal w/ the isle. They’re only interaction w/ them is through the like goblins that bring over the trash barges, but those guys are chill and basically don’t tell the aks anything lol.

So Ben is ruling his kingdom, and the core 4 are ruling their own, both sides are doing pretty well and ignoring each other, but then! All of a sudden there’s these sudden deaths/fires/some kinda terrorist attack on the outskirts of the kingdom.

I haven’t thought through this part too much, but basically he knows that they’re is some kinda threat, but he doesn’t know excatly what it is. All he does know is that the villain that is attacking is demanding to speak to the children of malifecent, jafar, cruella devil, and the evil queen.

He basically rounds up the heroes of those respective stories bc they’re all being threatened in some way or another. The mystery villain continues to do more damage and seems basically impossible to beat, and has given them a time limit b4 they’ll go and start destroying more

They discuss their options and decide their best plan is to go to the isle and convince them core 4 to help, bringing along the heroes and some of the main aks w/ them

Obviously it doesn’t go well bc they show up and mal basically has them arrested lmao

Again I have more in-depth ideas for this part but this post is already wayyyy to long so I’m trying to hurry and finish up

The talk, vks meet their respective heroes, everything is from ak/hero POV so as they explore the isle and talk to the core 4 and other vks they slowly find out about all ^^^ that stuff up there

The core 4 are eventually agree, and they go to face the villains only to find out its their parents who have been resurrected!!!! Fuck!!!!

Idk how or why just yet lmao but I will soon

Parents are obvi pissed, core 4 face their own parents and finally get like some kinda closer or smthn idk I feel like y’all get the gist

in the end auradon agknolages the isle as its own kingdom and the core 4 as its leaders and open trade/remove the barrier so the isle can continue to grow bc it’s been struggling due to lack of recourses

And that’s like the basic outline of my au! I wanna write it eventually but tbh I’m expecting eventually to be like 3 years from now bc of how much other stuff I have so for rn I’m just gonna blog about it. Obviously there’s a lot of other stuff/plots/emotional arcs etc I didn’t talk about bc like This Post Is So Long I’m So Sorry, So please please please send me asks/questions/comments/even your own ideas!!! Please. Everything about this will be tagged with “isle kingdom au” :3

i luv this shit bruh!! i was tagged by @ladyancientcosmos so uh 🥺🥺ty

nickname: well uh my first and middle names are thomas jaymes so most ppl just call me tj lol, but i also get teej and jayme sometimes, and one of my best friends calls me tommy (he's the only one that gets away with it though lol)

zodiac sign: we cancer up in this bitch!! 10th july babeyyy!!!!

height: around 5'5.5" i think? (lol) i gotta remeasure myself but i've grown since i last measured myself n i was Just short of 5'5" then soo

hogwarts house: i have no clue!! i've taken the test soo many times and i get a different answer every time!! it puts me in slytherin most but i don't think i really match the slytherin traits?? tbh i think i'm a ravenclaw, but ig maybe a hufflepuff?? i'ma have to go w/ ravenclaw tbh though lol

last thing i googled: uh i was looking up the dates of stonewall for an essay for my english language class

song stuck in my head: holiday by green day (a bop!!)

following: 141

followers: 40

amount of sleep i get: generally anywhere from 2-5 hours (yikez!) but i tend to like wake up n then not move for minimum half an hour, and on thursdays (bc i start late) and weekends i generally get like 4-8hrs

lucky number: 7 or 13 lol

dream job: making music bruh!! i live for that shit!!! i'm (technically) working on a covers album rn (but i hit a lil bit of a standstill what w school n stuff rip)

wearing: pair o those art socks (the ones w/ the scream on em), grey workout shorts, a cheap lion ring i got from claires when i was like ten, n then a black shortsleeve tee over a (bright) orange (i luv halloween) hoodie (+ my friendship bracelet and necklace lol i luv my friends sm bruh)

favourite songs: fully i'ma jus drop the tracklist for my covers album here jus bc i have an excuse to now lol;

midway arcade treasures - ghostbusters vhs

townie - mitski

lithium - nirvana

drown - bring me the horizon

jesus christ - brand new

wallflower - moses campbell

half a man - dean lewis

cop graveyard - teen suicide

say something - ceschi

mama - my chemical romance

song for the sleepless - ollie mn

brite boy - (sandy) alex g

broadripple is burning - margot and the nuclear so & so's

like real people do - hozier

u.n.i. - ed sheeran (might change this one tbh but i stand by the fact that this is his Only good album imo)

we found two dead swans and filled their bodies with flowers - teen suicide (yes it's the second teen suicide song on the tracklist lmfao but it's a banger so why not)

thas not all my faves but uh yuknow lol (i need to stop sayin "uh" lmfaoo)

instruments: guitar, bass, ukulele, a lil piano, recorder(if we're counting that), whatever i remember of clarinet from yr5, the teensiest bit of drums, and i'm tryna learn violin at some point

random fact: i recently shaved my own head (down to a buzzcut) for a laugh and livestreamed it on instagram lmfaoo

aesthetics: in terms of clothes mid-to-late 2000s noel fielding lmfao, but in general i luv anything even vaguely edgy and i love mid-to-late 2000s low qual emo shit and midwest emo (especially irt music), and i was gonna say sumn else but my mind jus blanked but yh basically i luv edgy (especially ironically edgy) shit

okay so uh now i gotta tag 17ppl so uhh,, dw if you don't wanna do it n sorry if you've already been tagged or already done it hnnnggg:

@b-lurryblitzbee @izzy-24-xx @glennatohowerton @theentiregdtime @hauntedmoth @anthonycrowley @junkyardvampire @idioticnimrod @macfoundhispride @whatriverrunsdeeperthanthis @bookishbloop @crazypaddydennis @floralmac @gayfatmac @bastardmanvibes @lesbianfreyja @weirditalienplumber

“7” people I’d like to get to know better

I was tagged by @kosmoskth 🥰 thank youuu for tagging me!💛

ONE / NAME / ALIAS: nanna (ik it also what many ppl call their grandma... but thanks mom and dad)

TWO / B-DAY: march 28th 1996🎂

THREE / ZODIAC: i’m an aries ♈️

FOUR / HEIGHT: i honestly have no clue, but I’m tall! probably around 5’10/11 if I’d have to guess😂

FIVE / HOBBIES: writing, listening to music, i read a lot of books as well, and sometimes i go for a run🏃🏼‍♀️

SIX / FAVORITE COLORS: black, white, yellow🖤💛

SEVEN / FAVORITE BOOK: it’s a whole series, but the black dagger brotherhood by j r ward is my favorite📖

EIGHT / LAST SONG YOU LISTENED TO: dionysus by bts😝😝

NINE / LAST FILM YOU WATCHED: The Meg🦈

TEN / INSPIRATION OR MUSE: my mom and bts

ELEVEN / DREAM JOB: if i wasn’t terribly afraid of needle and veins, i would have said a doctor😂🤷‍♀️

TWELVE / MEANING BEHIND YOUR URL: there really is no deeper meaning, other than I’ve always thought that crescent is a beautiful word and Jungkook is my forever bias🥰🥰

I’m going to tag: @pjmskosmos @utopiajeon @tangledsparkles @wthkook @kosmoskth (even though u already did it lol😂) and I’m also tagging everyone else that wants to do it!!🙌🏼

also don’t feel obligated to do it or if you’ve already done it! 💛

it's theory anon,hi!!how are YOU?i'm really good rn thanks:)) thank you for your kindness again,i'm really happy i could somehow help to help you feel even a tiny bit better and hope you're doing well now,too(and it's ok to not rest on your day off but it's also ok to do so if that's what you feel is right for you atm!).about the mf(ilm), i thought the same thing, it felt like a parallel universe type of story!i also really love plotlines about friendship, (again cont.i'll try to be briefer!)

(i’m so sorry i wrote a rly long reply so i’m gonna put this under read more !!)

2. friendship is beautiful and i feel oftentimes underappreciated(but not mx!there they go again being amazing) so i love the concept. personally i like not knowing what exactly the producers were thinking because having my own interpretation of something and seeing other ppl have their own fills me with wonder,like,that's art!so many people think so many different things and no one's wrong i love it!!your thoughts about them appreciating everything they've done so far,you're absolutely right(cont) 3. i hope they are able to bc everything's so hectic for the.i get lost just looking at their official schedule,i don't know how they do it but i also hope they are aware of all these things bc those are all mindblowingly huge accomplishments in my opinion and i just want them to feel like their hard work is worth it,yknow?(is this comprehensible?)and i know they feel pressure because as you said the business is nasty but yea i hope at the end of the day they can feel like (cont.???again 4. everything they've put so much of themselves into is worth it,i love their energy and fierce determination and i just don't want them to lose it but maybe as you said feel less pressured..but then the only way would realistically be to make sure they get awarded in the Real World so we're all doing our best in the system&hating it as you said:/ they just mean so much to so many people i want them to feel that too!i try to contain myself but here i go again! sorry it's so long AND i have more(con 5. also!thank you for your big reply and sharing your thoughts i mostly just agreed with (but you're right so what else can i do),i don't have mbb friends to vent to and fanperson(is there a gender neutral term for fanboy/fangirl?) over mx with and this is really nice and fulfilling(again,if i'm boring you,you can just delete the messages and not reply!) so THANKS!it's great to strive to be a better person but i feel like one(you) should also acknowledge the good things they're already doing(cont?) 6. you showed such pure kindness and really melted someone's(my) heart and that's a Big Deal!djkghddgwe can agree that we both inspired each other :') also please i feel like you're such a wonderful soul and you really deserve every bit of gratitude and appreciation i managed to express(i feel a lot moreprobably) so!yeah!reminder that you're lovely and deserve to be appreciated and i'm also very,very happy you're here!you made my day brighter for the 2nd time now wow!thanks! i hope you and(cont.:() 7. your gorgeous heart are taking good care and enjoying your day/night! and this cb!i really like it i haven't had time to listen to the entire album but jealousy!is a bop honestly it's my type of jam and the choreo is stunning and so are their voices!iwas so skeptical about the lyrics(they could've been like hero or stuck and those made me a bit >:/ honestly) but i really should've known they wouldn't fail me in any way ever!i can't wait to hear the rest of the songs i hope you enjoy them too!bye

hi theory anon, it's nice to hear from u again ! firstly, i am so sorry for the slow reply to this ! but im rly glad to know that u are doing good :-) i'm doing ok too thank u !! how are u ? kfjjfdsjfdf sorry that u had to read my tags but thank u for saying that !! i just feel so guilty when i do nothing bc im absolutely terrified of time passing too quickly ? just the thought of letting a few minutes go to waste is overwhelming ? even though i know it's not rational to think like this but ??? theres just this constant feeling that im running out of time so i try to get rid of it by always doing smth ?? and feel bad when i dont ? idk ?? but anyway im working on it and ill be ok ! sorry..not to be dramatic and tmi and all that kjdfdj istg this blog gives me too much freedom to say...too much :( (hope the internet folks that collect metadata never read the garbage i write bc..yikes they aren't gonna hav the best time) anyway..yea. what a paragraph to start off this reply :( sorry for the honesty and saying so much all the time btw :( not that being honest is necessarily a bad thing but ! idk every time i write smth i suddenly feel extra self conscious and feel like deleting it bc im rly embarrassed and always end up having big regret later when i reread anything ive typed up !! but i just keep writing them anyway bc...idk ?? i'd rly hate it if someone got discouraged from sharing their thoughts/worries/feelings which i think is a rly important human thing :( so  yea im rly embarrassed w anything i write but i'll keep doing it anyway bc i'm all for that kind of stuff and sometimes i know its not easy and it takes someone a lot to share that and its a good thing and i dont ever want anyone to feel discouraged from doing that ! anyway i just felt like i rly needed to say all of this..but pls dont feel obliged to reply to this mess !! anyway back to mx ! you are right :( i also hope mx feel like what they've done is worth smth w/e their definition or standard of that is :( like.. all of the hard work they've put into being mx it certainly means so much to fans but i hope all the hard work they've put into being mx also means smth to them at the end of the day and they are happy w what they're doing and what they've achieved so far :( and yes we'd love mx to always be rewarded in the real world :( though we love them and we want to get them a win, i know that everyone has their commitments, means and different circumstances and we can only do so much :( but even if u think its just a small contribution, everything adds up and counts and i know that all mbb hav contributed in some way in helping them get another win for this cb ! there are some mbb who can't buy albums or streaming passes and things and i hope they don't feel bad for this :( even if all you can do is watch the mv once or twice, even if you could only vote, i hope you know that it all counts and matters !! abt mx's schedule, i get tired just by looking at their weekly one idk how they can even put up w it all ?? after this they'll hav their japanese album and things and then they'll have their concerts and on top of all that apparently [some of them are also studying] ????? they are so hardworking :( HOW do they do it !! just..thinking abt their schedule is overwhelming !!! also pls dont think that you're boring me or anything like that :( im so thankful for any msg i receive and the fact that u actually took the time to type out smth to send to me ?? im so grateful ?? u are never boring !! honestly even if u sent me a stainless steel dishwasher manual w the page length of like..23 bibles, i'd still love u for it and i'd prob read all of it :( btw thank u sm for saying all those kind things !!! receiving kindness for the 3rd time is rly !!!!!!! and once again i've done nothing to deserve it :( i dont even know what i can say to you that will ever be enough to thank u again or to top what u hav already said ! if there was like a...maslows hierarchy of kindness of smth, ur at the very top of that triangle and anything i say will never be as kind as what you have said !! for you, i can agree that we both inspired each other :-) but really thank u so much from the bottom of my heart :( i hope you know how kind and lovely u are too ! if nobody told u this today, i wanted to say that im rly grateful to know u and i'm happy that you're here !! thank u again for being so kind and thoughtful and for making me smile !! :( same, i havent properly listened to the whole album either bc ive just been letting it stream in the background (but i dont count that as a proper listen unless i listen w headphones tbh) ill give it a good listen one day ! also im a repeat 1 kind of garbage person until i feel the need to listen to a new song ?? and rn jealousy to me is a song that gets better w every listen ??? shes too powerful atm :( one day ill listen to another song but today is not that day ! Actually.....I think jealousy is my fav mx song ???? before this cb i didnt hav a fav bc i couldnt pick the song i liked most out of blue moon/blind/fighter/incomparable. i was just gonna base it off the one w the most play count out of those 4 but now i know its jealousy ! what are ur fav mx songs ?? btw i know im always saying that anything mx releases is always a masterpiece no matter what, but in all seriousness its ok if u didn't like smth they released. i don't think it makes u any less of a mbb if u didn't enjoy a certain release or if u only liked one aspect of a thing but not so much the rest of the thing. anyway not to sound so...stale and commonplace but for lack of a better word/sentence, at the end of the day your own reactions and feelings to a piece of art like music...it's all just subjective isnt it ?? not liking that thing doesnt mean that its not a masterpiece or its any less of a masterpiece to someone else either so !! it's ok !! anyway this is rly....ive written a lot and its all over the place and incoherent probably :( i'm sorry !! feel free to reply whenever u feel like it, or no pressure on never replying at all btw ! also feel free to disagree w anything i say ! thank u sm for talking to me abt mx bc ive also got no mbb friends so !!! thank you :( theres so many times where i rly want to start a conversation w someone but im too scared and also i've got no clue abt how to initiate conversation ! and the times when i do manage to...i get stuck on how to keep the conversation going ? but when i figure smth out then im coming for u @ friendship !! i hope u had a good weekend and that you got some rest and that ur doing ok wherever u are !! until next time, take care ❤️❤️❤️

Rules: once you have been tagged you are supposed to write 92 truths about yourself. At the end, choose however many people you want to tag!

I was tagged by @elenaxrodriguez thanks babe!!

LAST…

[1] drink: coke. always coke. [2] phone call: my bff [3] text message: same [4] song you listened to: city and colour, thirst [5] time you cried: earlier today watching long island medium (the purest and most cleansing cry you could ever experience)

HAVE YOU EVER…

[6] dated someone twice: what does that mean? gone on 2 dates with the same person? dated, broke  up, then dated again? yes to the first, no to the second. [7] been cheated on: nope [8] kissed someone and regretted it: definitely [9] lost someone special: yes [10] been depressed: all the time [11] gotten drunk and thrown up: only the morning after thank god

LIST 3 FAVOURITE COLOURS: [12] blue [13] red [14] silver

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU… [15] made new friends: if this website counts then yep! and i love you all so much!! [16] fallen out of love: not this year, nope. still waiting. [17] laughed until you cried: doubtful, but possible. [18] found out someone was talking about you: yup. people suck. [19] met someone who changed you: nope. nothing changes. ever. [20] found out who your true friends are: that happened a long time ago [21] kissed someone on your facebook list: AHAHAHAHAHAHA no.

GENERAL… [22] how many of your tumblr friends do you know in real life: i follow a couple ppl i know irl but they’re not active at all and we don’t talk about it, it’s not a shared interest. [23] do you have any pets: yup! my python houdini :) [24] do you want to change your name: no way dude, i’ve been through a lot with this sucker [25] what did you do for your last birthday: tried to pretend it wasn’t happening [26] what time did you wake up: today? a bit earlier than usual. around 2:15pm. [27] what were you doing at midnight last night: probably giffing and watching a haunting [28] name something you cannot wait for: getting some fuckin $$$$ so i can finish my movie! [29] when was the last time you saw your mother: last saturday [30] what is one thing you wish you could change about your life: i wish i could stop being single [31] what are you listening to right now: drunk history XD god this show is amazing [32] have you ever talked to a person named tom: yup! went to school with one. [33] something that is getting on your nerves:  fuckin everything gets on my nerves. i just thought about that for like 3 minutes and decided the list is too long. everything. [35] elementary: what about it? [36] high school: are you looking for a name? [37] college: i spent way too many years in college, but that was a long time ago. i followed my sister out of town and did theater school for a year before deciding i hated the town and people and needed to come home. so i did my undergrad and grad school here at mcgill, then couldn’t find a job so did another degree in toronto, which was also useless. there was a time i was seriously considering staying in school forever and doing a phd, but there’s this thing called money.....and universities have already taken most of mine :/ [38] hair colour: reddish brown [39] long or short hair: i’ve always wished for long hair, but it never goes much past my shoulders [40] do you have a crush on someone: not a REAL one.....but there’s this guy called tyler posey.... [41] what do you like about yourself?: i care a LOT about things. i also hate it though. [42] piercings: my ears and tongue [43] blood type: no clue [44] nickname: div/divs [45] relationship status: single [46] zodiac sign: gemini [47] pronouns: she/her [48] fav tv show: teen wolf, obvs [49] tattoos: nope [50] right or left handed: right

FIRST… [51] surgery: does dental count? it should. that shit’s scary as fuck. had it a few years ago. [52] piercing: oh i have no idea when i got my ears done....maybe 10? [53] best friend: this girl jillian. we were best friends thru all of elementary. she took my deserts. [55] vacation: my family did a cross country US trip when I was 3. i have some strong memories, it’s weird. [56] pair of trainers: what? shoes? no idea?

RIGHT NOW… [57] eating: not eating, smoking. what else is new XD [58] drinking: i already told you that.... [59] I’m about to: another chapter on this edit i’m doing [60] listening to: STILL DRUNK HISTORY geez [61] waiting for: the weather to go back above zero [62] want: a steak [63] get married: right now? is this a proposal? [64] career: what’s that.

WHICH IS BETTER… [65] hugs or kisses: hugs [66] lips or eyes: eyes [67] shorter or taller: taller [68] older or younger: younger [69] romantic or spontaneous: romantic [70] nice arms or nice stomach: arms [71] sensitive or loud: sensitive [72] hook up or relationship: relationship [73] troublemaker or hesitant: troublemaker

HAVE YOU EVER… [74] kissed a stranger? yep [75] drank hard liquor? certainly [76] lost glasses/contact lenses? all the god damn time [77] turned someone down: of course, and i hate it more than almost anything [78] sex on first date? does it have to have been a date? wtf is a date. i’ve had one night stands, yes. [79] broken someone’s heart? yes and good riddance, he deserved it. [80] had your own heart broken? many times, fucker is on it’s last threads [81] been arrested? eheheheee oh the STORIES my friends [82] cried when someone died? yes [83] fallen for a friend: FUCK OFF

DO YOU BELIEVE IN… [84] yourself? sometimes [85] miracles? yup [86] love at first sight? yup [87] santa claus? the guy who comes down the chimney or the saint he’s named after? [88] kiss on the first date? definitely [89] angels? hmmmmm. well there’s this angel called tyler posey....so i guess they do exist

OTHER… [90] current best friend’s name: nathaniel [91] eye colour: blue [92] favourite movie: like, ever? it’s such a long list. but the eternal faves are titanic, romeo + juliet, sleepers, dogma, and the basketball diaries. yes. the 90s were important to me.

since this was fun i’m actually gonna tag some people! don’t feel like you have to @wellsjahasghost, @westhallen, @xproskeith, @tylerstitties, @archieandsrew, @paullwalkers, @maliia-tate, @stilinskikissme along with anyone who was sweet enough to read this whole thing. you’re the real MVPs <3

because i’m a perpetual mess, under the cut are several things ppl have tagged me in - thank you so much!

if i forgot anything then I’m v sorry and I promise I still love you more than I love my hot water bottle

tagging some people to do all/any of these that they want to/haven’t done yet. ilu guys  @fetchalgernon @snapslikethis @prongsno @ravnclaws @alrightevans @yourbcky @fleamontpotter

@hiddenpolkadots @cupcakeblake​ @lunarlychallenged​ and @stevxrcgers tagged me to do the current loves tag!

one song: never be alone by shawn mendes (also no promises by shawn mendes, also the entirety of his music because let me TELL you that boy is a blessing)

two movies: the king’s speech will always be the #1 in my heart and also love actually because yes

three tv shows: shadowhunters, abc’s castle and how to get away with murder. probably. it changes every day you see

four people: shawn mendes (WOW no one was expecting that kudos to me), emma watson, matt daddario and michelle obama

five foods: garlic bread, my mum’s pasta, avocado toast, breaded chicken and ice cream

@stevxrcgers also tagged me to answer these questions - thank you!

Relationship Status: “devouring tons of fanfics bc at least i wont be disappointed by men that way” (copying ur answer because honestly it’s on point)

Lipstick or Chapstick: lipstick is prettier and i love it more than my own soul but i’ve gone through three whole tubes of lip balm in the last 6 months and so ?? where does that leave us

Last Song I Listened to: ‘that’s my girl’ by fifth harmony

Last Movie I Watched:  i honestly have 0 clue

Top 3 shows: castle, shadowhunters, how to get away with murder. i have sold my souls to these shows

Top 3 Characters: hermione granger, james potter, my own ass because honestly. i’m a Character

Top 3 Ships: jily, myself/mental stability, michaela pratt/happiness

@dancingjily​ tagged me to get personal so here we go

What’s your name? Adriana, Ria for short

How old are you? 16. 17 in less than 3 months

What’s your current job? I’m still a student but also a human mess-copyright pending

What are you talented at? school lmao. no, but in all seriously, i’m v hard working and a tiny ball of rage with a heart of gold. i’m also talented at winged eyeliner which is A+

What is a big goal you are working toward (or have already achieved)? mental health. i want to view it as a first priority, and last year I feel like I’ve started doing that, which is nice. I also really want to work on myself and on growing up and maturing. so I guess I’m working on me, and tbh that’s one heck of a goal

What’s your aesthetic? handwritten letters, chokers and leather, christmas socks and fairy lights, large mugs of coffee or tea, blankets and scarves, red and gold, sunsets and dark hair

Do you collect anything? letters, tickets, and apparently, earphones

What’s a topic you always talk about? harry potter, feminism and dogs

What’s a pet peeve of yours? i’m a grammar nazi. trying to change that though *peace sign emoji*

Good advice to give? “When you wake up, your whole world's flipped. It's just different and you gotta, you know, you gotta, you gotta go with it and that's just simply growing up. And not see it in a negative way, you have to see it as it's been given to you, I mean, as much as times can be crazy, you're gonna feel like that's where you're supposed to be. You're not gonna feel out of place anymore, you're gonna feel like that's where you are meant to be. You don't have to pretend that it's easy all the time, you just let it go and, and grow with it. And you can't hold on to the old you, or the old this, or the old that, because you know you change. And it's not changing in a bad way, it's just changing, because that's what happens in life; You grow up, everyone moves on, you're just learning, you stay true to yourself. Changing isn't a bad thing, it never was. But at the end of the day, you know, you're the same person, and, and where your heart is, that doesn't change." - S.M.

What are the songs you’d recommend? boy, we are going to be here for a while. okay SO anything by shawn mendes (i have said this before and i will say it again), jon bellion’s entire works, ‘wild things’ by alessia cara, ed sheeran as a person and as an angel, FLUME, ‘naive’ by the kooks etc. i could talk about this all day

Do all of them

Thank you for asking!!!!! Is a kiss considered cheating? yes!!!Have you ever faked orgasm? lmaoIf you could have one superpower, what would it be? read people's thoughts!Do you think you are going to be rich in 7-8-9 years? uhhh probably not Tell us some funny drunk story. i got nothinWhy are you no longer together with your ex? wasn't real/ def a reboundIf you had to choose one way to die, what would it be? peacefully?What are your current goals? get bright futures to pay me tf back and keep my happiness upDo you like someone? I like like someone dudeWho was the last person to disappoint you? probably myself let's be real Do you like your body? Hell ya Can you keep a diet? I've never tried but probably notIf the whole world listened to you right now, what would you say? I'm so tired!Do you work? Unfortunately If you could choose only one food to eat to the rest of your life, what would it be? Ice cream for sure Would you get a tattoo? Hell ya Something you don’t mind spending all your money on? Makeup and clothesCan you drive? YesWhen was the last time someone told you you were beautiful? Idk probably today What was the last thing you cried for? I was worried about someone I love Do you keep a journal? Nooo I should start tho good idea Is life fun? Yes!Is farting in front of people irrelevant? Uhh I personally don't do it but idgafWhat’s your dream car? A camaro or a mustang Are grades in school important? YesssssDescribe your crush. very cute, terrible at texting back, sweetest person, loml, etc What was the last book/movie that really impressed you? It's on the tip of my tongue but I can't rememberWhat was your last lie? I told this little girl leprechauns are realDumbest lie you ever told? I also told her the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow was real and that only really special people can see themIs crying in front of people embarrassing? At work? Yes! In front of people u know? Maybe Something you did and you are proud of? Trying my hardest at happy What’s your favourite cocktail? No clue Something you are good at? Being fake in retail!Do you like small kids? Hell ya How are you feeling right now? Very tired and oversharingWhat would you name your daughter/son? Shit idk What do you need to be happy? Good vibes only! Lmao jk idk just like the opposite of anxiety Is there some you want to punch in the face right now? I can think of someone What was the last gift you received? A promise ring :)What was the last gift you gave? lots of stuff What was the last concert you went to? BastilleFavourite place to shop at? SephoraWho inspires you? My cat, Macy How old were you when you first got drunk? 18?19? I think 18How old were you when you first got high? 18How old were you when you first had sex? 18When was your first kiss? 14?Something you want to do until the end of this year? Stay happy?Is there something in the past you wish you hadn’t done? Mucho things Post a selfie. go on my insta I don't feel like itWho are you most comfortable around? Kas and joshName one thing that terrifies you. Ppl leaving me What kind of books do you read? Shitty ya books or lately no books at allWhat would you tell your 12 year old self? Bro hold on it gets so much better also don't be a stupid idiot!What is your favourite flower? Roses and petunias Any bad habits you have? Nail biting, people pleasing What kind of people are you attracted to? Happy hardworking peopleWhat was the last thing you cried for? I already answered this I thinkIs there something you don’t eat? Some food that truly disgust you? Seafood Are you in love? Hell ya Something you find romantic? Cliches How long was your longest relationship? Almost 2 years What are 3 things that irritate you about the same sex? girls are perfect What are 3 things that irritate you about the opposite sex? boys are slightly less perfect but they're okWhat are you saving money for? my futureHow would you describe your bad side? I literally do not care and get angry over everything Are you actually a good person? Why? Damn I hope so I mean I'm trying What are you living for? Idk man life is good!Have you ever done anything illegal? Me??? NooooDo you like your body? Yes damn I already said this Have you ever made someone feel bad about themselves intentionally? Probably I mean I hope not but ppl are shitty Have you ever cheated on someone? no!!! Favourite candy? Pure Hershey's or peanut m&msIs there a blog you visit every day, or almost every day? Tag it! Nah Do you play any computer games? What is your favourite game? I really like overwatch and stardew valley atmFavourite TV series? Greys anatomy!Are you religious? Does God exist? Sure What was the last book you read? Did it impress you and why?i don't even remember What do you think about vegetarianism/veganism? Do whatever the hell u want idcHow long have you been on Tumblr? Too long but I think 5 years Do you like Chineese food? Ya it's not bad McDonalds or Subway? McdonaldsVodka or whiskey? WhiskeyAlcohol or drugs? Drugs Ever been out of your province/state/country? Haha like once Meaning behind your blog name? It's a man overboard song and I honestly don't even remember how it goes I just don't wanna change it What are you scared of? Everything Last time you were insulted? Probably today idk Most traumatic experience ? EhhhPerfect date idea? I'm too tired to answer this something original Favourite app on your phone? Tumblr? IdkWhat colour are the walls in your room? BlueDo you watch Youtube? Who is your favourite youtuber? Kathleen lights is the light of my life also Dan and Phil ofcShare your favourite quote. "No"What is the meaning of life? That's too much Do you like horror movies? Noooo too scaryHave you ever made your mum cry? What happened? Probably Do you feel lucky or special in a way? Very very much so Can you keep a secret?yes