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beemusik · 3 years

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How David Bowie Invented Ziggy Stardust

Jason Heller’s book Strange Stars: David Bowie, Pop Music, and the Decade Sci-Fi Exploded is the story of how science fiction influenced the musicians of the Seventies. Out now in hardcover via Melville House, Strange Stars also examines how space exploration, futurism and emerging technology inspired the sometimes-cosmic, sometimes-mechanistic music the decade produced. In this section, Heller delves into the creation of Bowie’s most-famous alter ego, Ziggy Stardust.

A small crowd of sixty or so music fans stood in the dance hall of the Toby Jug pub in Tolworth, a suburban neighborhood in southwest London, on the night of February 10, 1972. The backs of their hands had been freshly stamped by the doorman. A DJ played records to warm up the crowd for the main act. The hall was nothing fancy, little more than “an ordinary function room.” The two-story brick building that housed it – “a gaunt fortress of a pub on the edge of an underpass” – had played host to numerous rock acts over the past few years, including Led Zeppelin, Jethro Tull, and Fleetwood Mac. Sci-fi music had even graced the otherwise earthy Toby Jug, thanks to recent headliners King Crimson and Hawkwind, and exactly one week earlier, on February 3, the band Stray performed, quite likely playing their sci-fi song “Time Machine.” The concertgoers on the tenth, however, had no idea that they would soon witness the most crucial event in the history of sci-fi music.

Most of them already knew who David Bowie was – the singer who, three years earlier, had sung “Space Oddity,” and who had appeared very seldom in public since, focusing instead on making records that barely dented the charts. His relatively low profile in recent years hadn’t helped his latest single, “Changes,” which had come out in January. Despite its soaring, anthemic sound, it failed to find immediate success in England. But the lyrics of the song seemed to signal an impending metamorphosis, hinted at again in late January when Bowie declared in a Melody Makerinterview, “I’m gay and always have been” and unabashedly predicted, “I’m going to be huge, and it’s quite frightening in a way.” Bowie clearly had a big plan up his immaculately tailored sleeve. But what could it be?

Before Bowie took the stage of the Toby Jug, an orchestral crescendo announced him. It was a recording of Beethoven’s Ninth Symphony, drawn from the soundtrack to A Clockwork Orange. To anyone who’d seen the film, the music carried a sinister feeling, superimposed as it was over Kubrick’s visions of grim dystopia and ultraviolence. Grandiloquence mixed with foreboding, shot through with sci-fi: it couldn’t have been a better backdrop for what the pint-clutching attendees of the Toby Jug were about to behold.

At around 9:00 p.m., the houselights were extinguished. A spotlight sliced the darkness. Bowie took the stage. But was it really him? In a strictly physical sense, it must have been. But this was Bowie as no one had seen him before. His hair – which appeared blond and flowing on the cover of Hunky Dory, released just three months earlier – was now chopped at severe angles and dyed bright orange, the color of a B-movie laser beam. His face was lavishly slathered with cosmetics. He wore a jumpsuit with a plunging neckline, revealing his delicate, bone-pale chest, and his knee-high wrestling boots were fire-engine red. Bowie had never been conservative in dress, but even for him, this was a quantum leap into the unknown.

Then he began to play. His band – dubbed the Spiders from Mars and comprising guitarist Mick Ronson, bassist Trevor Bolder, and drummer Woody Woodmansey – was lean, efficient, and powerful, clad in gleaming, metallic outfits that mimicked spacesuits, reminiscent of the costumes from the campy 1968 sci-fi romp Barbarella. The Jane Fonda vehicle had been a huge hit in England, and it became a cult film in the United States, thanks to its titillating portrayal of a future where sensuality is rediscovered after a lifetime of sterile, virtual sex.

In the same way, Bowie’s new incarnation was shocking, lurid, and supercharged with sexual energy. Combined with his recent admission of either homosexuality or bisexuality, as he was then married to his first wife, Angela, Bowie’s new persona oozed futuristic mystique, which Bowie biographer David Buckley described as “a blurring of ‘found’ symbols from science fiction – space-age high heels, glitter suits, and the like.”

But what bewitched the audience most was the music. Amid a set of established songs such as “Andy Warhol,” “Wild Eyed Boy from Freecloud,” and, naturally, “Space Oddity,” the Spiders from Mars injected a handful of new tunes, including “Hang On to Yourself” and “Suffragette City,” that had yet to appear on record. Propulsive, infectious, and awash in dizzying imagery, this was a new Bowie – cut less from the thoughtful, singer-songwriter mold and more from some new hybrid of thespian rocker and sci-fi myth. These songs bounced off the walls of the Toby Jug’s no-longer-ordinary function room. The audience, whistling and cheering, was entranced. A show eye-popping enough to dazzle an entire arena was being glimpsed in the most intimate of watering holes.

Although the crowd was sparse, people stood on tables and chairs to get the best possible view. The stage was only two feet high, but it may as well have been twenty, or two million – an elevator to outer space designed to launch Bowie into an orbit far more enduring than that of Major Tom in “Space Oddity.”

At some point, amid the swirl and spectacle of the two-hour set, Bowie announced from the stage the name of his new identity: Ziggy Stardust.

Like an artifact from some alien civilization, Bowie’s fifth album, The Rise and Fall of Ziggy Stardust and the Spiders from Mars, was unveiled on June 16, 1972. By then, Ziggy had become a sensation. After the Toby Jug gig in February, concertgoers embraced Bowie’s new persona in music venues around the UK. Attendance swelled each night, as did a growing legion of followers who dressed themselves in homemade approximations of Bowie’s outlandish attire.

Just as the album was released, he and the Spiders appeared on the BBC’s revered Top of the Popsprogram, performing the record’s centerpiece: the song “Starman.” For many of a certain age, watching Bowie on their family’s television that evening was tantamount to the Beatles’ legendary spot on The Ed Sullivan Show in the United States eight years earlier. “He was so vivid. So luminous. So fluorescent. We had one of the first color TVs on our street, and David Bowie was the reason to have a color TV,” remembered Bono of U2, who was twelve at the time. “It was like a creature falling from the sky. Americans put a man on the moon. We had our own British guy from space.”

Musically, “Starman” was an exquisite and striking slice of pop songcraft, exactly what Bowie needed at that point in his career. Lyrically, he smuggled in a sci-fi story that centers around Ziggy Stardust, who was both Bowie’s alter ego and the fictional protagonist of the Rise and Fall concept album, as loose as it was in that regard – it is more a fugue of ideas that coalesce into a concept. Through the radio and TV, an alien announces his existence to Earth, which Bowie describes in lovingly rendered sci-fi verse: “A slow voice on a wave of phase.” The young people of the world become enchanted and hope to lure the alien down: “Look out your window, you can see his light /If we can sparkle, he may land tonight.” But that alien is reticent, and his shyness makes him all the more magnetic.

Bowie sang the song on Top of the Pops clad in a multicolored, reptilian-textured jumpsuit, which Melody Maker called, “Vogue’s idea of what the well-dressed astronaut should be wearing.” In that sense, “Starman” is a self-fulfilling prophecy: before he could truly know the impact the song would have, he used it to describe its effect on Great Britain’s young people in perfect detail. He was the starman waiting in the sky, and the kids who saw him on TV soon began to dress like him, hoping to sparkle so that he may land tonight.

If Bowie intended “Starman” to be an overt reference to [Robert A.] Heinlein’s Starman Jones, the book he loved as a kid, he never publicly confessed to it. But the admittedly sketchy story line of Rise and Fall parallels another Heinlein work: Stranger in a Strange Land, the novel that had influenced David Crosby in the ’60s and, later, many other sci-fi musicians of the ’70s. The book’s hero,Valentine Michael Smith, comes to Earth from Mars; in Rise and Fall, Mars is built into the title. And both Valentine and Ziggy become messiahs of a kind – androgynous, libertine heralds of a new age of human awareness. Bowie claimed he’d turned down offers to star in a film production of Stranger in a Strange Land and had few positive words to say about the book, calling it “staggeringly, awesomely trite.” Be that as it may, he clearly had read the book and developed a strong opinion of it – perhaps enough for some of its themes and iconography to seep into his own work.

The opening song of Rise and Fall, “Five Years,” elegiacally delivers a dystopian forecast: the world will end in five years due to a lack of resources, and society is disintegrating into a slow-motion parade of perversity and moral paralysis. It’s a countdown to doomsday, with the clock set at five years. The song’s ominous refrain, “We’ve got five years,” is sung by Bowie with increasing histrionics, his voice sounding more panicked and deranged as he repeats the phrase. “The whole thing was to try and get a mocking angle at the future,” Bowie said in 1972. “If I can mock something and deride it, one isn’t so scared of it” – with “it” being the apocalypse.

“Five Years” set a chilling tone, but Rise and Fall didn’t entirely wallow in it. The coming of an alien rock star named Ziggy Stardust is relayed in a multi-song story that’s equally melancholy and ecstatic, tragic and triumphant. On tracks such as “Moonage Daydream,” “Star,” and “Lady Stardust,” Bowie wields terms such as “ray gun” and “wild mutation.” He also claims, “I’m the space invader,” as though he were channeling the ideas of his sci-fi heroes Stanley Kubrick or William S. Burroughs, particularly the latter’s 1971 novel, The Wild Boys.

As Bowie explained, “It was a cross between [The Wild Boys] and A Clockwork Orange that really started to put together the shape and the look of what Ziggy and the Spiders were going to become. They were both powerful pieces of work, especially the marauding boy gangs of Burroughs’s Wild Boys with their bowie knives. I got straight on to that. I read everything into everything. Everything had to be infinitely symbolic.” The photos of the Spiders from Mars inside the album sleeve of Rise and Fall were even patterned after the gang of Droogs of A Clockwork Orange; Droogs are mentioned by name in the Rise and Fall song “Suffragette City.” Furthermore, Bowie posed on theback cover of the album, peering out of a phone booth – just as though he were that other cryptic British alien who regularly regenerates himself and is often seen in a phone booth (specifically a police call box), the Doctor from Doctor Who.

Bowie also drew from work of the Legendary Stardust Cowboy. Born Norman Carl Odam, the Texan rockabilly artist released a twangy, oddball 1968 single titled “I Took a Trip (On a Gemini Spaceship)” that Bowie wound up covering in 2002; it was from Odam that Bowie borrowed Ziggy’s surname. And after going on a record-buying spree while touring the United States in 1971, he bought Fun House by the Michigan proto-punk band the Stooges, whose outrageous lead singer was named Iggy Pop. He jotted down ideas on hotel stationary while traveling the States, resulting in a name that was a mash-up of Iggy Pop and the Legendary Stardust Cowboy. Ziggy Stardust was a fabricated rock star, one whose sleek facade flew in the face of the era’s reigning rock aesthetic of laid-back, unpretentious authenticity. Instead, Bowie wanted to puncture that illusion by taking rock showmanship to a previously unseen, self-referential extreme.

When it came to Bowie’s urge toward collage and deconstruction, Burroughs remained a prime inspiration. A pioneer of postmodern sci-fi pastiche as well as the literary cut-up technique, in which snippets of text were randomly rearranged to form a new syntax, Burroughs straddled both pulp sci-fi and the avant-garde, exactly the same liminal space Bowie now occupied. Rock critic Lester Bangs accused Bowie of “trying to be George Orwell and William Burroughs” while dismissing him as appearing to be “deposited onstage after seemingly being dipped in vats of green slime and pursued by Venusian crab boys” – a description that sounded like it could have been cribbed straight from a Burroughs book.

In 1973, Burroughs met Bowie in the latter’s London home. The meeting was arranged by A. Craig Copetas from Rolling Stone, and the resulting exchange was published in the magazine a few months later. In the article, Copetas observed that Bowie’s house was “decorated in a science-fiction mode,” and that Bowie greeted them “wearing three-tone NASA jodhpurs.” The ensuing conversation ranged across many topics, but it circled around science fiction – and in particular, the similarity Bowie saw between Rise and Fall and Burroughs’s 1964 novel Nova Express, a surreal sci-fi parable about mind control and the tyranny of language.

In an effort to convince Burroughs of the similarity, Bowie offered one of the most revealing analyses of Rise and Fall as a work of science fiction:

“The time is five years to go before the end of the Earth. It has been announced that the world will end because of a lack of natural resources. Ziggy is in a position where all the kids have access to things that they thought they wanted. The older people have all lost touch with reality, and the kids are left on their own to plunder anything. Ziggy was in a rock & roll band, and the kids no longer wanted to play rock & roll. There’s no electricity to play it.”

Bowie went on:

“[The environmental apocalypse] does not cause the end of the world for Ziggy. The end comes when the infinites arrive. They really are a black hole, but I’ve made them people because it would be very hard to explain a black hole onstage.”

Curiously, it took him another twenty-six years before casually revealing in an interview that a sci-fi song called “Black Hole Kids” was recorded as an outtake during the sessions for Rise and Fall. He called the song “fabulous,” adding, “I have no idea why it wasn’t on the original album. Maybe I forgot.”

But Bowie dropped the biggest revelation about Rise and Fallin the 1973 conversation with Burroughs. Ziggy Stardust, according to his creator, is not an alien himself; instead, he’s an earthling who makes contact with extra-dimensional beings, who then use him as a charismatic vessel for their own nefarious invasion plan. But like Frankenstein’s monster being erroneously called “Frankenstein” to the point where it seems senseless to quibble with that usage, Ziggy Stardust continues to be widely considered the alien entity of Rise and Fall. Considering the shifting identity and gender of Bowie’s most famous alter ego, that ambiguity may well have been his intention. Talking to Burroughs, he ultimately labels Rise and Fall “a science-fiction fantasy of today” before reiterating its similarity to Nova Express, to which Burroughs responds, “The parallels are definitely there.”

Rise and Fall has always been as fluid as Bowie’s facade itself. Michael Moorcock’s Eternal Champion cast a shadow over Ziggy Stardust, especially the glammy incarnation of the many-faced character known as Jerry Cornelius – who was adapted to the big screen in 1973 for the feature film The Final Programme. It coincided with Ziggy’s own ascendency, not to mention the New Wave of Science Fiction and its preference for fractured narratives and multiple interpretations over linear stories and pat endings.

During their mutual interview, Burroughs brought up the then-current rumor that Bowie might play Valentine Michael Smith in a film adaptation of Heinlein’s Stranger in a Strange Land. Bowie again dismissed it. “It seemed a bit too flower-powery, and that made me a bit wary.” For his part, Bowie’s fellow sci-fi musician Mick Farren of the Deviants later admitted he always thought Michael Valentine Smith was a major influence on Ziggy Stardust. “I was certain someone would call him out for plagiarism,” Farren said. “Nobody did.”

Bowie may have denied his affinity for Stranger in a Strange Land by his boyhood go-to author Heinlein, but he was not shy about professing his love for one of the authors Lester Bangs compared him to: George Orwell. Almost as a footnote, Bowie told Burroughs, “Now I’m doing Orwell’s Nineteen Eighty-Four on television.” That project would never come to pass, but it would lay the groundwork for his next, less famous sci-fi concept album – a jagged, atmospheric song cycle that plunged Bowie into the darkest extremes of dystopia.

#David Bowie #Ziggy Stardust #article

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less--beans · 4 years

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lihn asks: 2, 9, 14, 19, 20, 22, 27, 28, 39, 40, 47

2. Fav scenes?

can i just say the whole musical? i really want to just say the whole musical. i’ll not mention any scenes with songs, bc that’s a whole other thing, but i’ll pick a few (i said a few but it’s a lot more than that, i’m very sorry) top scenes. i’m pretty sure most ppl answer this with like 3 scenes but i’ve never been very good at picking so here, have 10. i’m going to make a list bc if i just put it all in a paragraph it would be way too long.

-i love sheila and susannah’s first actual conversation. it’s funny how nervous and awkward susannah is, and how many questions she asks and weird things she says. i love how sheila just rolls with it, answering her questions and ignoring the weirdness. francis’ little interludes are funny and it makes my heart melt when sheila goes ‘but in the good way,’ especially after seeing that susannah believes francis and everyone else when they tell her she’s weird in the bad way, and i can’t help but die when i remember that sheila is probably the first person who saw how weird susannah was and didn’t insult her or act like it was a bad thing but instead just rolled with it.

-it’s a short scene but i love when they’re teaching susannah how to smoke and she visualizes francis being torn apart. it’s the funniest thing. so short and yet so good.

-another short yet awesome scene is right before the other one, when sheila spends a solid 20-30 seconds just staring at susannah and listening to her write songs. very gay. also, in the same scene, sheila listing what she likes and then adding that susannah’s interests weren’t too bad either. her acting like she usually does and just kind of putting down the other person’s interests a little before letting her walls drop and acknowledging susannah as a person was amazing. again with the walls dropped thing is her respecting susannah’s boundaries and not demanding to know who the letter was from. we love character growth.

-yet another short scene is right before oh well when sheila’s kind of teasing her about the morse code thing and being like ‘you’re obsessed.’ it was hilarious. and then it kind of clicked in their heads with the nonsense syllables and the secret code and it was like they were finally on the same wave length. it was very very sweet.

- i loved the scene where sheila got taken to solitary. phenomenal acting. my heart broke. i’ve watched it so many times and i love looking at various reactions of the girls (judith being victorious, sheila being hurt and scared and angry, dorothy in shock and still trying to comfort others, ya-ya collasping, kitty being angry and disappointed, rat just watching concerned and scared from the sidelines) as it all goes down. it’s painful and it was such a different ending to act 1 than i thought would happen just two minutes prior, and it’s a majorly emotional scene.

-in the beginning of act 2, she’s like ‘no, this is my fault!’ and all the girls just agree with her, and then judith tells the history of harriet. i did not see her backstory coming at all. that part made me physically sick and very horrified. i didn’t necessarily like that scene, but i respect it bc of the acting, and the effect it had on me is proof that it was good. also, when kitty comes from judith and reveals that sheila took out her eye? that was the second huge revelation in the same scene and i had to pause it to process. plus, that was a sick burn. go kitty.

-the scene with kitty and susannah before masochist!! powerful, emotional, had me in tears. I adore kitty so much. some real stuff was said there, and i, as someone who is part of the lgbtq+ community, was really affected by that scene. also masochist, but again, we’re not going into songs right now. that’s a whole other thing.

-i died when the music was building up and susannah was on the steps and she was giving her whole rousing speech and she finally admitted that she loved sheila. the music stopped, susannah stopped, my heart stopped, and the girls gave a wonderfully funny fake gasp. the girls’ reactions in that scene were impeccable and so hilarious to me, and there’s of course the fact that susannah, after stumbling over her words and feelings the entire show, finally admitted out loud that she loved sheila. not only that, but she did it in front of everyone. very big character growth, plus the growth of my heart as it swelled and burst in my chest. i loved it.

-the transition of judith being like ‘there’s no way she just thinks the plumbing sucks’ to sheila loudly complaining about her hatred of the sucky plumbing was perfect. also, i can’t watch sheila’s slow realization of what’s happening without laughing. she’s such an idiot and i love her. her slamming her head into the pillow and slowly raising it up again as it sinks in? comedic genius. just the parallels of susannah being like ‘she’ll figure it out soon’ at the exact same moment sheila figures it out is amazing. judith going ‘i will happily eat my own sh-’ and then being cut off by sheila knocking back was hilarious, and kitty’s ‘do you want fries with that judith?’ was so iconic.

-them being like ‘how are we going to do this??’ in the middle of the song and everything going dark and quiet for a few seconds other than that sign of ‘four minutes and 38 seconds later’ before going ‘that’s a great plan’ was so freaking funny. we’re going to skip the moment where sheila and susannah reunite for now bc i’m probably going to make another post about it and this post is already so long. also, i love how they outlined the plan as they put it into action. it was poetic cinema. perfect execution of one of my fav tropes and i really enjoyed it.

9. Fav lighting moments?

I love the beginning transition where the lights flash and show the silhouettes of the girls, it’s so powerful. I also love the emphasis the lighting gives when it changes in the pre-reprise of teenage delinquent and also in susannah’s song reprise (basically whenever everything stops and susannah has a gay moment). the lights shining through the smoke to give the illusion of fire? amazing. that was exactly what the scene needed to take it from incredible to literal perfection. on that note, i liked the ghostly feel the lights gave as they shone through the windows once the girls were outside. lastly, i loved the lights in the end of teenage delinquent. that was a very emotional moment and the lights just added to it.

14. A major(s) character you love?

I love sheila a lot. she’s so tough and yet so sweet. i first met her and i was kind of worried about if she was going to be one of the stereotypical mean tough girls, but she managed to be strong and kind, and it’s amazing. i love how she’s a little aloof and yet totally willing to take down anyone who hurts the people she cares about. she fights asp, buzz, and even judith, all bc they hurt her family. plus, that girl’s been through a lot. i’ve made a few other posts just based on what i got from the three failed escape attempts but i really feel sad for her and all that she’s been through.

19. Fav (pre)reprise?

So we obviously have the oh well reprise when susannah is delivering the esp to sheila and that’s such an amazing one that always gets me. i’ve cried a lot at that scene. sheila smiling and trying to hide it while half-heartedly trying to get susannah to stop playing by warning her that she would get in trouble... ugh. my heart. another one that i really like, however, is when sheila and susannah first met. the pre-reprise of teenage delinquent gets me almost as much as the oh well reprise does. it’s so short, only a few lines, but we see susannah immediately fall for her. it’s so sweet and it sets everything up so perfectly, and i especially love the percussion. in the last line the drums kick in and crescendo and it’s just a masterpiece.

20. Headcanon(s) for what happens before the show?

i’m very sorry to announce that i forgot who the creator of this (if anyone knows please message me!) but some created this amazing timeline. it’s phenomenal. i’ve pretty much accepted everything on that list as canon.

22. Headcanon(s) for what happens between Teenage Delinquent and Finale?

judith definitely became a chill therapist. 100%. she keeps in touch with ya-ya and they try to arrange meetings every now and then. sometimes they see certain plays together. ya-ya went to hollywood with dorothy. she made it big in special effects, and dorothy prefers to act in smaller gigs in underground places. ya-ya helps out with dorothy’s plays sometimes. they share an apartment together. sometimes dorothy sees rat in the audience of her shows. she doesn’t question how rat knew where she’d be performing and she doesn’t question the money and cigarettes that are pushed into her hands after. she also doesn’t question it if rat ever shows up in need to stay for a few days. it happens every few months, and dorothy just makes sure there’s good food in the house and slips some money into rat’s things when she’s sleeping. kitty keeps in touch with susannah, and she attends all of susannah’s performances she can. susannah goes on tour with her band, and she could’ve sworn in their tour in hollywood she saw three familiar faces in the crowd. she’ll never know for sure though. sheila stays in mexico for a while before deciding to go back to the states. she doesn’t know what happened to francis. at the border she told him he was lucky she didn’t kill him and left on his bike, never to see him again. she traveled around the us with that bike, eventually deciding to visit hollywood. she saw a familiar name in an underground club and immediately went to the next showing available, watching with barely held back tears as dorothy starred in a play. she saw rat in the audience and ya-ya’s name credited in special effects, and she had to leave at intermission to keep herself together. she wasn’t sure how to approach them or what she would do or say, so she took off that night to keep the temptation away. she went all the way across the country to nyc, figuring it was about time she visited some old friends from mexico. she walked into a record shop to ask for directions and caught a thief stealing from the store a few minutes later. she walked in to return the record.

27. Teenage Delinquent or Revolution Song?

how am i supposed to choose?? from the moment i heard teenage delinquent pre-reprise i loved both versions. it’s such a pretty tune, and it’s so meaningful, and the emotion in it is so powerful. it makes me cry every time, and the end... wow. they’re gay and in love and i get very emotional about it. i absolutely love teenage delinquent. revolution song, however, was one of the first ones i ever heard and probably the one that made me watch the show. it’s so energetic and so great, and i cannot listen to it without wanting to start my own rebellion and take down some terrible patriarchal system. it’s constantly in my head and it’s so catchy and fun. plus, i love watching it in the show, and the girls throwing things and burning down the building is one of my fav things. i love both of these songs so much and i physically can’t choose which one is my favorite.

28. Something you like/have noticed about the show that you haven’t seen anyone else mention yet?

both of these things are only briefly mentioned in the show but i’ve still never seen anyone talk about them. this show takes place over the span of only 17 days (excluding the finale, obviously). in the beginning, when susannah had just arrived, asp got the call about the interview and she mentioned it being in 17 days. a lot happened in 17 days, especially since they were locked up for 8 of them. all of the events of act 1 took place over 9 days at most, and probably less, bc we know sheila didn’t respond right away in solitary and we’re not sure of how much time passed until she did. that feels like such a short time span to me. another thing is that they’re on the fifth floor. i don’t know why this stood out to me, but it’s probably something to do with the fire. they would have lit the fire and gotten out really quickly. i feel like imagining them on the first or second floor is different than imagining them on the fifth floor for some reason, and i just felt like pointing it out.

39. What got you interested in LIHN?

I was bored in between classes and so i watched a random youtube video of musical clips. there were three clips of lihn in there, and they interested me enough that i watched the entire musical a few days later. i immediately fell in love and i’ve watched it almost every day since.

40. What does LIHN mean to you?

love in hate nation means so much to me. i absolutely love this show. there’s so much to think about and so much to build on. musicals are amazing bc there’s choreography and lighting and lyrics and sets and so many things with hundreds of little hidden messages, and deciphering potential meanings for those messages is so fun. this show is no different. there’s so many things to analyse, and it’s such a good show that i want to analyse everything about it. i can’t put into words how much i love this show. just know it’s a lot.

47. A single wish for the future of the show?

it says a single wish, but i have three, so i’m going to list them all. if i could only have one it would for sure be the first one. first and foremost, i want a cast album. goodness gracious, i want a cast album. so bad. second, i really want this to get to broadway. more people need to know about this show. it’s so good and it’s worth everything. i want this to get big. third, i believe joe posted something about a potential proshoot? i could be wrong but that would be amazing to have.

my grammar is terrible and this is so much longer than it should’ve been, so i’m sorry about that. thank you so much for asking!! it was really fun to answer these. if anyone wants to ask more questions, the link to the asks is here

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drrjsb · 4 years

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Happy Holidays! Body and Soul: The Endgame Fix "Part 16: Tea and Empathy"

Summary: Bruce and Natasha return home to find a friend waiting on the porch. They tap into Bruce’s supply of Girl Scout cookies, make a call across the galaxy, and later they answer one from closer to home. Yes, we earn our mature rating.

Notes: Happy Holidays to those who celebrate! Here’s nice big chapter for those who’ve waited. It’s still the evening of Monday, October 30, 2023.

AO3 Fanfiction.net WattPad

Excerpt . . .

The last thing they'd expected to find was Dr. Stephen Strange waiting for them on the porch, but the Sorcerer Supreme was relaxing on the carved wooden swing with a gray cat on his lap as Bruce pulled up and parked the HX in its usual spot.

"Dr. Strange," Bruce said as he got out of the vehicle. Natasha didn't hesitate to hop out of the passenger's side door. She'd never met him, yet he looked exactly like the pictures she'd found when she researched him after Tony and Nebula had arrived back from Titan. She guessed the large gray cat that jumped out of the tall man's lap must be Gertie.

"Dr. Banner . . . and Ms. Romanoff, I presume," the magic-user returned in his deep baritone voice as he stood up.

"You presume correctly," she said as she joined Bruce. It was nice not to have her identity questioned from the get-go. The cat darted inside through the pet door, and Natasha caught Bruce huffing out a rather flummoxed breath through his nose.

"Stephen, good to see you. I assume you've already met, Gertrude. May I introduce you to Natasha Romanoff," Bruce said, extending his right hand. "Nat, this is Stephen Strange, Earth's Sorcerer Supreme," he explained and mirrored the same open-handed gesture of introduction with his left hand.

"A pleasure," the dark-haired physician said with a slightly amused smile. Natasha came forward and shook the hand he offered her as she stepped onto the porch with Bruce right behind her. "It's a pleasure to meet you," she said. Nat noticed his hand was every bit as scarred as Bruce's was and almost as warm, too. She'd read about the auto accident that ended his surgical career in his file.

"It's good to finally meet you, Ms. Romanoff." He held onto her hand a moment longer than necessary, and Nat knew he was scanning and scrutinizing her, so she stared steadily back into his intense blue eyes and matched his firm grip.

"She's the real one," Bruce assured the sorcerer as he used the tile pad to let them into the house. "Please come in and have some tea, Doctor."

"I can't stay for long, but tea sounds good," the physician admitted and followed the couple through the mudroom and into the kitchen where Sirius greeted them with a low "Whoof!" as Bruce assured the dog the guest was welcome. Strange held out the back of his hand, and the overgrown pup gave it a brief sniff before backing off and circling Natasha protectively.

"Have a seat," Bruce said and filled a copper kettle with water and placed it on the stove before reaching into the cabinet for cups and saucers. Natasha collected Bruce's jacket and hung it up with hers on a peg near the door. She offered to hang up Strange's cloak but he kept it draped over his shoulders as if he were still warding off a chill from the evening air.

"Darjeeling, oolong, green, herbal, some other kind of herbal, or Earl Grey?" Bruce asked as he checked through the containers on the cabinet where the loose-leaf teas had congregated.

With a mischievous smile, the sorcerer suggested, "Surprise me."

"All right, but I doubt you came here for the tea, Stephen."

Strange looked at both Bruce and Natasha, moving around each other with the ease of an experienced pit crew. "No, but I did come for the company and to compare a few notes on certain loose ends, which have turned out to be something more like an unraveling than a tying up of threads."

Bruce sighed. "No neat dénouement for the Time Heist?"

"No, apparently not." Strange studied Natasha who had found Bruce's oversupply of Girl Scout Cookies in the pantry. Without missing a beat, Bruce handed her three small plates to go with the teacups and saucers he'd just set on the counter. The sorcerer was still marveling at how well they coordinated and in-tune they seemed, despite being separated for so long. "Please tell me you have the peanut butter ones dipped in chocolate," he requested. Those had always been a weakness of his.

Natasha dispensed with formality and handed the physician an unopened box of his apparent favorites. She stacked half a box of Thin Mints on a plate for Bruce and pulled out a few butter cookies with chocolate backing for herself. She placed the opened boxes in the middle of the table since it might take the remainder to get through the conversation even if it was brief. Bruce passed her some spoons and napkins to lay out, too. The honey and sugar were already in the table's center. None of them took cream with their tea.

Natasha sat down across the table from Strange whose back was to the mudroom door while Bruce stayed leaning against the higher section of counter, waiting for the kettle to boil. She'd missed seeing what type of tea he'd put into the stainless mesh ball, so it was going to be a surprise for her, too.

Strange cleared his throat as he slid the remainder of his box of cookies into the middle of the table with the others. "First, Ms. Romanoff . . ."

"Natasha, please."

"Natasha, I'm very happy to see you are among the living. I spoke to Wanda earlier, and she passed along the good news. I've since communicated with Fury and Captain Danvers, so I have some information about your captor to pass along if you'd care to hear it."

"Of course," Natasha affirmed.

"Please do," Bruce said with his burly arms folded across his chest.

"As you've already surmised, your impersonator was indeed a Skrull, Natasha. The assumption was the Skrull was either from a different group that Earth hadn't encountered before, one which split off during their diaspora, or perhaps he was some kind of a rogue agent. However, once Fury's allies, the Skrulls under Talos' leadership, compared cell samples collected from the craft in the lake to their database, it became evident that there was a connection."

"So, Nat's fake is related to some of Talos' people?" Bruce asked.

Strange nodded, "Four of them to be exact."

"I hope we're talking siblings or cousins," Bruce said with a frown.

Natasha cut to the other possibility, "Would they be grandparents?"

Strange nodded toward Natasha in acknowledgment, "In a manner of speaking, you were dealing with a being who doesn't exist yet."

The kettle's whistle gradually crescendoed to its full-throated high note as the implications sunk in. Bruce removed the kettle from the burner and turned the gas off. "Something tells me there's a common thread between this issue and what's been happening since the Time Heist. Clint told us there have been more paradoxes turning up."

"Yes, more than just the ones we've been dealing with concerning the Sousa family. In that case, it does seem to come back to a certain individual."

"Speaking of him, have you had a chance to sit down with Steve?" Bruce asked.

"We spoke about a week ago at a coffee shop in the Village, the day after he arrived (or reappeared?), but I can't say that he was extremely helpful. We went over what he'd done and where he said he was for all that time he was absent from our reality, but there were discrepancies almost from the beginning. Before I came here, I stopped by his apartment in Brooklyn, but he doesn't appear to have been there in some time if at all since Tony's funeral."

Bruce continued to frown. "I was hardly able to speak with him the day our Steve left and the old man arrived before that version left the Compound grounds. I asked if he understood the implications his little side junket might have for our timeline, and he clammed up tight. Sam and Bucky got in my face when I asked him again, so I thought it was better to back off before heavier things than words were flying. Do you think he's skipped?"

Natasha was imagining Sam's over-protective reaction and the possible outcome of a three-on-one fight with Bruce and the control it had taken on his part to avoid one. Even with those odds, a damaged arm, and a reluctance to harm the others, she'd have still put her money on Bruce. Nevertheless, the whole thing bothered her. She'd been at Peggy's funeral, and Natasha knew just how much Peggy had meant to him. Natasha also remembered seeing Peggy's husband Daniel there, not an older version of Steve. Selfishly throwing the rest of the universe into chaos and creating multiple splinters of the timeline—multiple conflicting realities—didn't match up with Steve's character or ethos at all.

The sorcerer shook his head. "I believe you were right not to press the matter, under those circumstances, Bruce." Strange thought a moment before answering the physicist's question, "If he's still in our reality, it seems likely he's gone underground. I've not been able to track him, and I suspect that's because he's not who he claims to be."

"Or he's found a way to cloak himself from a magical search since I imagine that's what you've already done," Natasha suggested. Strange nodded his confirmation. He'd used a hair from Steve's apartment to weave a tracking spell, and the magic had completely failed. "Do you have any idea exactly what he did to affect the timeline?" she asked.

Strange tried to keep from rolling his eyes with frustration before he dove into his explanation. "It appears he created a parallel timeline in which he lived out his life with Peggy Carter and then renounced that reality after her death to return to our own long enough to drop off the older version of his shield to Colonel Wilson. I'm not completely certain why he felt so compelled to return it, except that he seems to have wanted to pass along his mantel to Sam."

Bruce shook his head, feeling just as frustrated as the magic user. "Why would he want us to think he'd lived his past out in our timeline? Are you sure this really was our Steve?" the physicist asked.

"Those are good questions," the sorcerer stated.

"Was he human?" Natasha asked.

Strange shrugged the slightest bit. "That's also a good question."

"So, we really don't know if this was our Steve, another version of Steve, or a Skrull or something else?" Bruce posited. He'd warmed up a large ceramic teapot and steeped the tea, so now he poured their three cups full and settled them on the saucers for the other two.

"Correct, and that also leaves us with the anomalies involving the Souzas' background shifts and other exchanges or apparent 'edits' of digital footprints," the physician noted and blew on the steaming tea in his cup. "Mmm, white tea, ginger, and . . . bergamot?"

"You're good," Bruce said and placed his larger-sized cup and saucer at the head of the table and sat down in his extra-sturdy seat between the other two. "Whether this was our Steve or not, I'd seriously like to know where he acquired the Pym particles necessary to do the extra hop back to our reality," Bruce groused.

"Although I couldn't get him to say as much, I imagine he stole an extra vial or two when he returned the Space Stone," Strange surmised.

Bruce nodded, "That's the most likely explanation, but I'm amazed that didn't sabotage the whole Time Heist. Damn, it likely created at least one more splinter." The physicist clenched his jaws and then his right fist tightened. Now, he wished he'd thought faster, swallowed his pride, and called in Carol as soon as the old man had appeared on the lakeside bench. Things might have gotten messy, but they also might have had definitive answers to some of their questions. He felt Natasha's hand on his left forearm and realized his frustrations were getting the better of him. Bruce relaxed his jaw muscles and quit grinding his teeth as he loosened his clenched fist, flexing his damaged hand.

"Is Carol the only one who can detect a Skrull?" Natasha asked as she reached for a jar of honey in the middle of the table. Strange flicked his finger to levitate the jar gently into her grasp and unscrewed the lid. She raised an eyebrow and smiled her thanks.

"Please tell us you've figured out some method of detection, Stephen," Bruce said a bit forlornly.

Strange chuckled. "That actually brings me to another interesting piece of news," he said and unfastened his cloak to expose a familiar artifact resting on his chest.

The scar behind Bruce's right thumb heated up even before he realized what was once again housed in the amulet. A green light flared behind the metal housing, making the connection unmistakable. "How did you get it back?"

"As you might know, Stark returned the broken amulet that housed the Time Stone to Master Wong who had it repaired and returned to the place it had previously been kept. Two days ago, the Time Stone reappeared in its housing. I and several others have been investigating this phenomenon since then."

"How is this possible?" the scientist asked in disbelief. "Did Steve pocket it and bring it back?"

"I don't think so. Our surveillance cameras would have detected that" the sorcerer noted. The couple both gave him slightly incredulous looks. "What? We're not allowed to use both magic and technology?"

"You're right. That makes perfect sense," Natasha said. People were only human even if they were powerful magic users.

"What was on the recording?" Bruce asked, moving on with his inquiry.

"There was a green flash and the Stone manifested, once again whole and seated in the amulet just as it had been before."

"You wouldn't happen to have had a spectrometer nearby?" Bruce asked ruefully, wishing there had been more solid data collected.

Strange sighed, "No, but we can talk about adding one if you think that would be useful in the future."

"I'll start the paperwork for you myself," Bruce offered.

Natasha had grown quiet, her mind racing through possible scenarios and ramifications. "Is there any way to check for the presence of the other stones? If the Time Stone has returned, it must be possible for the others to do the same, right?"

The men looked at each other before Bruce spoke. "That's why I wish we'd gotten an energy signature and a reading on the Time Stone's manifestation; then, we might know what we need to look for with more specificity."

"Don't you have some of the data from the testing you and Tony and later Shuri did on the Space and Mind Stones?" she asked.

"You're right. We have data on those two energy signatures, which leaves . . ."

"The Power, Reality, and Soul Stones," Nat finished for him.

Strange held up his hand. "Perhaps another angle of inquiry that would help narrow a search would be to focus on the most likely places each Stone might manifest." The couple looked at each other and nodded. Strange gave a little snort as he watched them telegraphing and ending each other's thoughts. "Are you two sure you've been apart?"

Bruce went a little pale and then flushed beneath his verdant complexion as he looked at her with adoration. Natasha simply smiled back at the sorcerer and patted Bruce's muscular thigh beneath the table. "Now, Doctor, you're sounding like Tony Stark, except he'd have said something more embarrassing, and Bruce would be blushing less."

Bruce started to object but stopped himself. "True," he admitted with a thoughtful nod. "Anyway, as you were saying, Stephen?"

"I think it would help facilitate our search if we looked in the other Stones' last known locations," Strange suggested.

"You mean before Thanos 'acquired' them," Nat clarified.

"And using them and destroying them," Bruce added.

The sorcerer stroked his beard in thought. "Yes, and I believe I may know whom to ask for help with some of that. Bruce, can you still contact the Benatar?"

"That depends upon where they are and whether or not they're using a jump port," Bruce said. "Have you spoken to Fury about this? He may have better equipment and more contacts."

"Fury already knows and is checking through his channels, but I suspect the Guardians and Thor might be closer to Nowhere, Morag, or the remains of Xandar and Asgard than Fury's contacts."

"I have the prototype communication linkup that Rocket and I first put together if you'll give me a few minutes to set it up," Bruce said.

"I can spare it, especially if it gives us some answers," the physician responded.

"Back in a minute," he said and stood up from the table. Sirius watched as his master disappeared out the back door and headed to the warehouse, but he stayed at Natasha's feet.

"How about the Mind Stone?" Natasha asked. "Would Wanda be able to sense if it reappeared?"

"So far nothing," Strange admitted. "She was the first person I contacted after returning from the Kamar-Taj."

"And the next?"

"Wakanda."

"To check on Vision?"

"Yes, but nothing new, no manifestation. His body is still an empty shell."

"But Bruce, Shuri, and Helen are all working on it now," Natasha said.

"That's my understanding," Strange said. "The last time I spoke with Bruce they were working on integrating the programming and data from different sources, but still searching for a power source to replace the Stone."

"That's my understanding, too," she said, not wanting to get ahead of what Bruce may or may not have shared.

Sirius stirred and Bruce entered the kitchen with a reinforced metal case in hand, which he laid out on a clear spot in the middle of the kitchen floor and opened. "Give me a minute. This wasn't designed for hands my size. Friday, bring the array online and prepare the reactor for a higher power demand."

"Already on it, Doctor Banner," the Interface intoned brightly.

The physicist tapped a tile in the wall next to the counter to expose a variety of ports and outlets. He'd looped a coil of cables over his shoulder, which he unrolled and attached to the outlets first before connecting it to the device.

As Natasha rose from her seat, she looked at the open case that was unfolding onto the floor around itself to create a circular pad. She recognized some similarities to the diagnostic device at the medical facility from earlier in the day and the holographic communication array Bruce had designed for the Avengers Compound. She'd used it for almost a week to communicate with Okoye, Rocket, Rhodey, and Carol before the Skrull replaced her, but that device had been larger and less portable. Nat was certain this was the beta version of the machine, on which Bruce had kept tinkering after Rocket and he had designed it. Luckily, he kept it because the larger one was probably destroyed. "Do you need some help with the controls?" she asked.

"If you could flip the input lens up and handle the keypad, I'd appreciate it," he said as he handed her a modified Stark-pad and pointed to a manual set of switches on the base that stood out from the sleeker parts of the design. "That should give control of the contact calculations over to Friday." Nat did as he'd requested and adjusted the lens when it flipped into position. "Friday, engage please," Bruce said.

"Aye, initiating. Doctor, whom would you like me to contact?"

Strange caught himself before answering and Bruce grinned back. Having another degree holder in the kitchen was only slightly unusual. "Whoever is on the Benatar—Rocket, Nebula, or Thor will do. I imagine we'll be talking to all of them if this goes through."

"Please, not Drax or Quill," Strange said half under his breath.

The device hummed slightly and they waited a few moments. "Where is your antenna set up?" Natasha asked.

"The warehouse roof. It's the one place flat enough and big enough to hold the communication array, the telescopes, and some other equipment. The local Historical Society would have thrown a fit if I'd stuck anything on top of the house."

"And the reactor?" she asked as the pad in her hands began to display a map that looked like a detailed, three-dimensional star chart.

"It has a lab to itself. Why? Are you worried we'll need more juice?"

"Just thinking ahead to the Christmas lights," she teased back. "Can I display this with the holographic projector in the device?"

"There should be an option for that in the dropdown menu at the upper left," Bruce explained. She quickly had the images flashing into life in a gold column of light, and Strange moved around the table to get a closer look.

"I've found them," Friday said. "Do you want me to hail the Benatar?"

"Please," Bruce said.

In a moment, they heard a crackling that quickly resolved as the channel cleared. "Awwww . . . Did ya miss me, Big Green?" Rocket Racoon's voice asked as the golden image of the stars broke up and reformed into a life-size image of their friend that almost looked solid.

"Just the person I wanted to talk to," Bruce said.

The Guardian tilted his head and squinted. "Holy shhhh... .? Natasha?" Rocket sputtered as he recognized her. His fists went to his eyes and he wiped at them with disbelief before staring back again. "Nice haircut. What's going on? This better not be a joke!"

"No joke. Long story," she said, stepping further forward. "I lost about five years, but I did get to work with you for about a month and a half on the policing council we were setting up before I was grabbed."

"Sweet sushi! Then who was I working with? Who died? Who said she wouldn't let me in the kitchen anymore if I ate something out of the garbage can again?"

Natasha looked at Bruce for direction, and he raised his eyebrows and gave her a small shrug. Strange nodded briefly when she looked at him. "It was a doppelganger, a double who was also a very talented spy," she said.

"A Face Dancer or a Skrull?" Rocket asked.

"A Skrull. So, you've heard of them before?" she asked.

"Well, there aren't a lot of them around since the Kree went all empire on them, but they are known for their shape-shifting talents. I've never heard of one doing it for a whole five Earth years though. That's a hell of a commitment."

"Natasha! I knew I heard your voice!" Thor rumbled as he came into the column's projection field, pushing Rocket a bit to the side as the little technician protested and held his nose.

"Thor?" Natasha asked, sounding quite puzzled by his shaggy and fleshy appearance in exercise shorts and a tank top.

"Damn, I meant to tell you about him," Bruce whispered apologetically. "He got very depressed."

"Sorcerer Strange, do we have you to thank for her resurrection?" the Asgardian asked.

Bruce and Stephen looked at each other, and the sorcerer cleared his throat and stepped closer to the communication device's input lens. "No, I believe Natasha managed to free herself."

"Then you escaped Vormir on your own? That is truly auspicious!" the thunder god assumed.

"No, Thor, I was held in stasis for about five years."

"Five years? Baldur's ghost," he stammered and looked away, calculating how long she'd been a prisoner. "I . . . I'm so sorry. Then who did we work with? How did it happen?"

"A Skrull spy, you smelly dope," Rocket growled and slapped Thor's belly to back him up a bit.

"Is that who died?" Thor asked.

"Yes," Natasha said with a nod.

"I guess that explains some of her behavior and the shabby way she treated Bruce. You've told Clint, right?"

"He knows. He was here earlier," she explained.

"Ah, good," Thor said with a nod. "I'm glad you called me."

"You weren't the only one they called," Rocket said irritably as he elbowed in front of the gigantic blonde again. "Why don't you go back to helping Quill put that Bo-Flexier thing together?!"

"Looks like you've lost some weight," Bruce noted.

"Only because we're outta beer," Rocket snapped.

"Thank you for noticing," Thor said with a pleased smile.

"Actually," Strange spoke up, "there is another matter we wanted to discuss. If Nebula is there, we'd like to include her in the conversation." It took about ten minutes of discussion to get everyone up to speed between interruptions as the rest of the Guardians joined the conversation, except for Groot who mostly rolled his eyes as he worked a newer handheld game in the background before leaving the cabin. No, they'd not heard any news of the Infinity Stones manifesting, but they'd been mostly focused on following Gamora's trail and looking for Asgardian survivors. There was confusion, but also a lot of joy after Bruce's Snap returned people.

The Guardians had good news on that front. The spaceport where the heavily damaged hulk of the Ambassador had been hauled after its destruction at Thanos' hands had doubled its population of 1,200 as unsnapped Asgardians and even some resurrected ones rejoined the living along with a few Sakaaran gladiators as well. Thor teared up as he thanked Bruce for including so many of his people in the Hulk-Snap.

"It was the least I could do. I really wasn't sure if it had worked. Were Loki or Heimdall returned?" Bruce asked.

"No news of them yet, but we've not given up hope," Thor said with a shrug. "Most of the survivors will be immigrating to New Asgard to join the rest as ships become available," he explained.

Rocket chuckled, "It's not like we could get them an Uber Lift, but the locals seemed pretty motivated to get them all off the station and resettled."

"Before they eat them out of lauder and breathe them out of oxygen," Nebula added. "We're headed toward Nowhere next as we search for my sister. Perhaps we'll hear something about the Power or the Reality Stone there."

"Hope so," Quill added. "We've heard stories that don't match up. Some reports say there's nothing left of Xandar, but others say only the capital was damaged and it's slowly and quietly being rebuilt. When we get closer, the information should get more reliable."

"If there's something to see, we won't know till we see it with our own eyes or not," Draxx said stoically.

"I hate to break up this love fest," Rocket intoned, "but we are nearing the jump port. Has everyone made their requests, kissed their moms, and said their good-byes?"

"Please let us know as quickly as you're able if there's news of a Stone manifesting," Strange entreated.

"We certainly will," Nebula replied in her husky all-business tone. Bruce had a good rapport with Rocket and an abiding friendship with Thor, but he placed most of his confidence in the tall blue cyborg.

"Just a moment," Thor said and got close to the device as the others receded from view. "Let me know when the wedding is, okay? I'd like to be there." Before Bruce or Natasha could respond, he'd winked and signed off.

"Well," Strange asked impishly, "when is it?"

#DrRJSB #Brutasha #Bruce Banner #Natasha Romanoff #Hulk #Black Widow #Endgame Fix #EndLame #MCU Fail #HulkWidow #BruceNat #Dr. Strange #Guardians of the Galaxy #Pepper Potts #Happy Hogan

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browniefox · 6 years

Text

The Dark And Light Sides Of The Moon 9

Pro No Even’s of @trulymightypotato‘s Royal Expectations

Snow and Gar finally talk it out

Aftermath of learning the truth goes smoother than one may think

oOo

On the bright side, the cut was fairly clean.

Lark’s face was screwed up in pain, sweat spotting his brow. Snow was running his fingers through Lark’s hair, muttering words of comfort. Gar meanwhile did his best to gently pull Lark’s hand off the part of the cut it was covering. It was hard, since by now Lark was doing extra harm as the nails started to pierce his skin.

“Lark, Larkspur, I need you to let go,” Gar knew Lark probably wasn’t paying attention. It was probably the kid’s first real injury that approached anything close to serious. Still, he managed to get not-his son’s hand off the cut and put his own hand over it. Carefully he eased his own magic over the slice, encouraging the flesh to knit back together, closing up at if it had never been opened in the first place, healing over without a mark.

“Lark, bird, you’re okay,” Snow comforted as Lark’s eyes darted over. He may be healed, but the echoes of the pain didn’t fade quite as quickly. Lark moaned and slowly sat up, rubbing his now-healed arm.

“Thanks dad.” Gar stopped breathing at the word. He didn’t deserve this. It wasn’t his to have.

“... you should get some rest.” Gar got up and pushed his way through the crowded grounds.

He should’ve just stayed in his room. Kept away from everybody until they figured out what was going on.

“Garuku,” Gar stopped at Violetscale’s voice. They were staring at him with those long-dead eyes that cut deeply into Gar. “You do know you’ve done nothing wrong.”

Gar didn’t respond to that, simply turned back around and continued on his way. People from the inside smiled at him, waved to him, believing they knew him. Not realizing he was just an imposter. He went back to a room that wasn’t his, sat down on the bed of a stranger, and pulled the medallion out from under his shirt.

At least back at home, he knew where he belonged.

*knock knock knock*

Gar didn’t respond, hoping whoever it was would leave. They didn’t though. The door creaked open and the person Gar wanted to see the least came in. Snow stood awkwardly in the doorway for a moment.

“Thank you for healing Lark.” Snow said after a long moment.

“I just did what any decent person would do.” Gar shrugged off the compliment. Snow didn’t leave though, if anything he came farther in. And farther in. In fact, the door closed and Snow was on the opposite side than Gar wanted him to be on.

He heard Snow draw a deep breath.

“Gar…”

This was it. It had to be. When Snow would finally lay into him about his anger, his disappointment. Gar braced himself for the onslaught of ‘stay out of this’ and ‘you’re not him’, ‘you should’ve have ever gotten the chance to even glimpse what you missed for your mistakes’. At least he’d already heard it all from himself.

“... I’m sorry I failed you.”

Wait what.

Gar finally looked over as Snow, whose face was overflowing with guilt.

“You became a-a demon and were forced to kill, ruined the magic of the Changing Lands when it was the last choice you had, lived longer than anybody should be forced to. And you still managed to turn things around, save the Realms, and where the ever-loving Fuck was I?!” Rage replace the guilt as Snow stared down at the ground, at nothing? “Did, did Soulstealer get me there too? Was I just some useless puppet? Did I die without the death even being able to help my Royal? You must-” Snow swallowed, afraid of the words in his own mouth. “You must hate me?”

“Hate you?” Gar stood up. “Snow, I, what… Snow, I don’t hate you.”

“Then why can’t you stand to look at me?!” Snow shouted, taking a step forward. “Why do you seem like you’re avoiding me?”

“Because YOU hate ME!” Gar shouted back. “I’M the reason L- Lo- Lozul is gone, I’M the reason those kids don’t have their father here, I’M the reason my world was so ruined for years! I shouldn’t be here, I shouldn’t be ruining this more than I already have!”

“I. DON’T. HATE. YOU.” Snow stepped forward enough to grab Gar’s shoulders. They were finally looking each other in the eyes. “I… I’m proud that managed to do what you did. That you held in there… without me.”

“You didn’t die. I tried to save you but I messed up. But you were able to save my daughter, take her to the guardians, keep her safe. You’re the reason I’m human and alive now.”

And they stared at each other. The words shouted bounced around for a long while, and with them a weight felt like it was lifted off of Gar’s shoulder.

“I will find a way to get you home.” Snow promised.

“SNOW, SNOW, SNOW, SNOW,”

A crescendoing shouting drew the two Protector’s attentions, and Snow opened the door, looking out into the hallway.

“Yes?”

“SNOW! Snow, there’s-”

“He looks just like Lo-”

“-alking style was we-

“-ust sort of nodded to me, which only-”

“-estroy the Kingdom!”

“Piya, Crumpler, I can’t understand I word you’re saying.” Two soldiers skidded to a stop before Snow, moments away from bowling him over. Gar perked up at the familiar names.

“Snow, there’s an imposter Lozul walking around.”

“Is there really?” Snow raised an amused eyebrow.

“Oh definitely. I don’t think he knows we’re onto him yet though.”

“Does he look something like this?” Snow waved Gar over, a mischevious grin on his face.

“Hoi!”

“Demon!” One of the guys - he sadly had no idea whether it was Piya or Crumpler - slapped him.

“Crumpler, it’s alright.” Snow tried placate the upset man. “Everything’s okay.”

“Then who the hell is that?” Piya pointed at Gar, hand on the hilt of his sword.

“Just an old friend.”

“This is some magic stuff going on, isn’t it?” Crumpler squinted at Snow, then looked at Gar.

“You got us.” Snow held up his hands in surrender. Crumpler sighed dramatically.

“You two make it so hard to do a good job.”

“At least it’s not as bad as when we were younger.” Snow chuckled.

“When we were younger, we had less to lose.” Piya pointed out. “Now there’s kids to think about, and a definite future instead of just a Hopefully There Is One.”

“Those were the days.” Snow sounded almost wistful. It was easy to romanticize times you’d already lived through.

“Snow!”

Snow sighed and shook his head lightly at the familiar voice. Gar looked down the hall, opposite the way Piya and Crumpler had come, to see Agora.

Limping.

“Agora!” Gar shouted and rand down to them. The young protector looked up at Gar with wide, terrified eyes. They leg was bleeding, as was a slice on their stomach, and their eyes was steadily bruising. “Agora what happened?”

“Edel’s been taken.”

oOo

Despite Snow’s continual reassurance, Lozul didn’t trust Gar.

He just had a thing against a demon - ex or current - being so close to his family.

But, frankly, there was nothing he could do about it. Which was the worst part.

“Lozul, are you ready for today’s meetings?”

Lozul jumped as Molly entered, already dressed for the day. Lozul sighed and put the wolf helmet back over his head.

“I supposed I am.”

Oh, it’s the meeting time of year? Snow floated into view. I haven’t seen those troublemakers in a while.

Molly jumped upon seeing the shade.

“Don’t worry, it’s just my old protector, Snow.”

“How… did you get here?” The queen asked, watching the shade.

Bluescale brought me. Lozul needed an explanation.

“So, then, you know about Gar?” She bit her lip nervously.

“I don’t blame you for keeping it from me.” Lozul quickly said. “But yes, I do know now.”

“I’m sorry, I-I was just trying to do what I thought was best.”

“What’s done is done. Let’s not be late to the meeting.”

The rest of the Nobles were in there. A few had some unsettling grins on their faces. Phil was missing from the beginning. Molly took her place next to Wade, quickly scribbling something on a piece of parchment and pushing it over to her husband. Lozul’s eyes tracked the clump of shadows that was Snow as his deceased protector slipped under the table.

“Good. I was worried about this being dull.” Bluescale was standing against the wall, watching the group with a small, proud smile.

Lozul had to admit, he’d been surprised how… professional everybody was being. Sure, a lot of them were asleep or not paying attention by the end of the day, but nothing completely wild had happened. Perhaps it was because there were so few. When you had 98+ people in a room, there was constantly people getting away with things. Getting away with, as in before things just inevitably devolved into complete and utter chaos.

King Wade started to on about the financial state of the kingdom and and Lozul let himself get distracted by the shadow on the other side of the room creeping up near Protector Kjellberg.

“Snow?” The whisper caught him off guard, and he turned to see Amile also watching Snow’s journey to Felix.

“Is it a bit cold in here?” Felix asked, shivering.

“Oh, must be me.” Bluescale replied and winked at Lozul.

“Hey, what was that wink abo- AARGH!” Felix slammed his head back into the wall in a desperate effort to get as far away from the sudden chilling mass of darkness in front of him.

I’M THE GHOST OF PROTECTORS PAST, HERE TO RETURN YOU TO THE GRAVE WHERE YOU BELONG, Snow bellowed.

“Snow!” JP jumped up, staring at the darkness. “But I thought you were gone.”

I’m just here for a quick spookening. Snow floated to the center of the room.

“Please tell me you’re not actually going to re-kill me.” Felix pleaded, still pressed up against the wall to be as far from the shade as possible.

Don’t worry, it takes too much effort. I’m just here to… chill, for a bit. Carry on please.

He then proceeded to be the biggest distraction of the morning, floating through people, messing with notes, and generally being a nuisance. But it was pretty clear nobody was really focused today anyway. Not much progress was done that morning, and eventually Bluescale left early, apparently not being able to stand statistic for much longer. Not that Lozul blamed her in the slightest. If he wasn’t obligated as a ‘Protector’, he’d be doing something else too.

It was a relief when it the break for lunch came, and everybody basically ran down the dining hall. The first one through the door was the very unfortunate PJ. The second he stepped into the room, a vine whipped down from the ceiling, wrapped around his foot, and returned from whence it came.

“Oh hey PJ, nice to see you hanging around.” Phil’s voice could be heard from the dining hall.

“Great. It’s begun.” Wade stepped to the front of the group, drawing his sword. Dan cursed.

“I should’ve known by how Phil didn’t even try to come to the meetings. I guess I didn’t think he’d be up to doing something on this caliber. JP, where’s your wife when we need her?”

“Stick close to me.” Cry instructed, going up next to Wade. “We can make it through this.” Some lightning crackled around them like a force field. Half of the group stayed outside of the hall, cheering them on. The vines did try to grab them but jerked back upon getting zapped.

“Nice job Cry!” Jess cheered. “Let’s go get some lunch.”

And that was when Cry slipped.

The break in concentration was enough time for the vines to go down and pluck Jess, her Protector, Static, and Wade up to the ceiling. Lozul managed to freeze the two that tried to grab Molly and himself, and Cry started the electric field just in time to avoid the same fate as everybody else coming to Felix, Dan, and him.

“You might want to watch your step.”

Lozul looked up to see Bluescale and Greenscale lounging in vine-swings, Phil grinning down at them.

“PHILLY I AM GOING TO KILL YOU!” Dan shouted upwards.

“We’ve got to keep moving Dan.” Cry said, shuffling forward unsteadily on the ice. “The others are counting on us.”

“Oh he’s going to have it coming to him tonight.” Dan muttered.

Lozul couldn’t help the laugh that bubbled in his chest.

This was just starting to almost feel like home.

#browniefox writes #moon au #royal expectations #garuku bluemoon #pro no evens

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snowtoroislord · 7 years

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List 97: Top Eleven Favorite Soundtracks in Anime

So much god damn music! From amazing tunes to ear shattering sounds, it was a journey listening to them all individually and rating them as such. Some were impossible to enjoy, and others had no official ost sadly. Yet, I had a lot of fun going through all of it. Music is a joy to me, and out of those 100 series(movies were exempt) these are the best of them all. I do hope some of you can enjoy these picks for their musical composition and if you have a little time go search them out. It will be well worth your time.

Also I counted wrong when making my final cut so I have 11 because I didn’t have the heart to cut the 11th show.

11. Spicy Wolf

Gosh what a lively OST. It is so charming to embark on. That fantasy world you see and imagine trying to be a part of really comes right off the screen when you hear this soundtrack. The music is so fitting in every way. I think the one drawback is this OST doesn’t have a particular show stealing song, outside of that though it is very wonderful.

10. Baccano

Historical anime tend to be very realistic. Well, Baccano isn’t exactly that way but it’s like if history decided to be a lot more creative and let loose. Hence why the jazz accompaniment for this OST is spot on. One of the more free feeling and wild musical genres(and a personal favorite of mine) this soundtrack is dripping with pure excitement and fun. Some tracks are a tad short or samey but for the most part you get a lot of strong pieces that get you tapping your foot to them.

9. Mushishi

Mushishi is really a dark world full of mystery and the occultic. It always finds a way to bring the viewer on a spiritual journey with those mushi though. It’s something very tranquil and almost fragile. The music captures this feeling eerily well in the best of ways. I’d say most if not all the tracks are superb, the only drawback is they lack any length and end up being hard to name on the spot. As a whole though they were a strong cohesive.

8. Haikyuu

Wow this was a surprise. I didn’t expect this soundtrack to be so damn mesmerizing with it’s selection. I really could feel the intensity and emotion welling inside me while listening to it, and I found a new respect for the series. The time spent on the music was damn good. Really I am impressed with this soundtrack for how it delivered. Props to you, props to you.

7. Trigun

Such great guitar tracks right here. Most anime tend to really fall back on piano music of some sort, and guitar tracks seem to be less and less. And when they do appear boy are they just devoid of any effort. Not with Trigun, that classic rock and rock electric guitar to get you amped is there in spades! And it kicks ass just like the Human Typhoon. The issue is the OST is so long you kinda get some throw away songs before the good stuff settles in the dust.

6. Clannad

Emotional OST’s are hard to come by. I heard so many soundtracks try to be moving and just fail with plain pieces. Clannad however excels at being a great mixture of SOL, comedy, and drama with it’s show and the music needed to match that tone. And by golly it sure as heck does! I would say some of the finest individual tracks are on this OST, but they get a bit diluted with overuse in remixes to the point of making you go, “Please stop that, please right now!”. This is an issue in all Key OST’s and Clannad suffers from it whilst being so good everywhere else.

5. Darker than Black

Another big surprise was this OST! Wow, just wow how could this show have such a powerful Jazz musical powerhouse OST. Then I look it up and remember Yoko the Angel Goddess Kanno produced it. Seriously this is good stuff and makes an already enjoyable action thriller series feel even more exciting and bombastic. Truly a delight to hear, it’s only shortcomings would be a handful of short needless tracks.

4. FLCL

Here is a respected pick I am sure, but I think we can all agree in terms of anime music, it is very unconventional. While thinking that, I also think that it is strange and foreign in the best of ways. What else would fit the weird ass blob of storytelling that is FLCL than something very unanime. A great selection of music to support a very odd ball short anime. I love it for what it is. It isn’t the best but it is damn good.

3. Kids on the Slope

Did I mention I loved Jazz music? Yes? Ahh knew it! Well this is a time piece with all types of jazz music. From piano to drums to trumpet. The music hits all sorts of new creations and old historical classics. Yoko Kanno does it again with brilliance. Kids on the Slope has a powerhouse OST, the only reason I can’t rank it higher is not all the music is original and so 1/3rd of the strength of the music comes from preexisting music. I don’t want to credit it all to Kanno that way but it is well placed and makes a lot of sense. I can’t give it the overall win though for anime OST’s should be mostly of their own merit.

2. Shiki

Atmospheric and disturbingly creepy as fuck this OST makes Shiki the chilling ride it is. While the character designs can detract from the horror, hearing the haunting ambiance this OST produces as it builds up to a soul splitting crescendo is hard not to be amazed by. I really think it is one of the best OST’s I have ever heard. A lot of simple and deeply effective scary music tracks that create a horror vibe like none other. It would be a winner but the top pick is just too good to best.

1. Cowboy Bebop

Obvious pick is obvious but with over 6 hours of music Cowboy Bebop has my hands down pick for best anime soundtrack. The amount of genres it covers alone is impressive to boot, but to see the musical quality attached to each and every one of them is so noteworthy, I can’t praise it enough. Bebop is the master of music in anime for me and Kanno’s finest work. She is my favorite composer and this for me as of now is her Magnum Opus. It never fails to amaze me after hearing it time and time again. These 11 OST’s are all fine works, but for me Bebop’s soundtrack just reminds me how sweet life can be with a little music in it.

Disclaimer: I do not own or claim to own any of the above pictures. The credit goes to the original creators of each and thus will be considered theirs. Enjoy the pics!

Well those were my all time favorite soundtracks! What anime OST’s do you get your rocks off to!? Tell me somewhere!

See ya Space Corgis!

#anime #anime list #top ten #actually eleven #soundtracks #ost #anime music #spice and wolf #baccano #mushishi #haikyuu #trigun #clannad #darker than black #flcl #kids on the slope #shiki #cowboy bebop #space corgis

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