#all that i know is i kinda don't like yennefer and triss is best girl sorry not sorry
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Okay, so I'm finally caught up with The Witcher 3 and as expected, most of the discourse here is about our favourite bard Jaskier and his hot lover. And while I LOVE him and Radovid, I really wanna see more discussion about the rest of show. So here's some of my favourite points/moments/whatever before vol. 2 comes out:
Yennefer genuinely trying to make amends with everyone, and becoming a better person. Her letters to Geralt?? Love them.
Ciri being not very great at magic - very refreshing to see a Chosen One™ teenage girl actually struggling and being clumsy and imperfect, and seeing her abilities improve realistically. Very tired of seeing the "trains for one week and instantly becomes a master at magic/whatever skill" trope.
On that same note, I really love that she gets to be a badass fighter, dirty and scruffy, but also still enjoys her pretty dresses and other traditionally feminine things. Girls are both, one doesn't excuse the other, and I just find that very neat.
Domestic Geralt and Yen. The dinners, the anniversary celebration, co-parenting Ciri. Hella cute 🥺
VERY interesting to see Nilfgaard seeking yet another truce with Francesca and the elves. Literally one of my favourite plot points of season 2 - Nilfgaard are the supposed "evil" ones, and yet so far are the only ones actively helping out the elves, even if with an agenda.
Emhyr burning his portraits and Pavetta's, erasing his past as Dunny. I'm very interested to see how the father dynamic parallels between him, Geralt and Ciri will play out.
Cahir, my skrunkly boy. ✨Him✨ Is he evil? Is he kinda okay? Is he actually disgusted with himself for murdering his elf boyfriend, and thus securing his position in the Nilfgaardian court, knowing that he's simply sinking deeper into Emhyr's grasp as merely a pawn, or is he just a cold-blooded army blorbo, and truly believes that the White Flame is the answer? Who knows!
Fringilla?? Living her best life as a free woman, dancing and drinking the trauma away? We love to see. Her hair looked AMAZING in the tavern scene. But please, someone give her something to do, girlie was NOT made for the streets.
Yarpen (his that his name?) is such a sweetheart, I love him 🥺
RIP Fern and her husband (am bad at names), and all that Library of Alexandria worth of knowledge and literature.
Love love love the gay uncle/rebel teenager relationship between Jaskier and Ciri. They're so funny together. Them spying on Geralt and Yen?? Fabulous.
YEN FINALLY BECAME A MOTHER. Listen, I almost teared up when Tissaia said that because, ugh. I love their friendship. And Tissaia is one of the very few people who really knows Yennefer, and how much having a child meant for her. And now she is, and she gets to be a parent with Geralt. And she's so awesome. I love that she, unlike Triss, isn't always kind and gentle with Ciri. She knows how much Ciri is struggling for control, she gets it. And she allows herself to be vulnerable and truthful with her - something that even Geralt struggles to do at times [with Ciri].
Geralt learning that his mother has died, and genuinely crying, less because of her passing, but more because he never understood why she abandoned him, and how much that hurt. Especially now that he's a father himself, and knows what true love and care and fear for a child means. Because he could never, ever hurt or endanger Ciri the way Visenna hurt him. Because there's always another way, it has to be. Someone correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't this like the first time we see him cry? I don't remember if he actually shed any tears after Sodden, or when Roach died. Crazy to think he's been alive for so many decades, and yet still carries so much hurt and saddens towards his mother.
Jaskier having a crush is so cute hahaha. But also, I love the way he talks about his love for Geralt. Because sure, he's a slut (affectionately), and sure, him and Radovid? Their chemistry and connection is off the charts. But Geralt? His love for Geralt is so genuine, it runs so much deeper than people realise. It's unfair to say it's purely platonic or romantic or whatever because how can you even label a love that profound? "Family goat", AS IF BURN BUTCHER BURN ISN'T THE MOST HEART-WRENCHING, ANSTY BREAKUP SONG EVER, like okay, we all know how you really feel about Mr. Grumpy Pants. Honestly, big thank you Joey Batey, he really brings that romantic artist energy to life.
Philippa and Djikstra being in a bdsm relationship was NOT on my bingo cards. We love a dominatrix witch.
Tissaia's hair. She looks superb.
In comparison, someone please give my girl Triss some hair conditioner. Why did they let her walk around like that like, bestie, define your curls, please I'm begging you.
Vengefortz being the Big Bad - I did have a suspicion but didn't really want to believe it. What he did to those girls was atrocious and messed up, I was legitimately horrified. But also, bravo, whatever his purpose is, he pulled it off quite well.
Istred with that hair and eyeliner. Weirdly hot. Kinda wanted to see more of him.
Jaskier x Valdo Marx beef was EVERYTHING. I cackled when his trope appeared on the boat like fucking glee club. Their song on the conclave was extremely annoying tho, I did not love the constant replay of scenes.
GERALT SAID I LOVE YOU. Geralt said I love you. To Yennefer. Out loud. In public nonetheless. Gasping, clutching my pearls, screaming, crying, throwing up. I love them so much.
Yennefer serving looks 24/7 like the total boss babe she is.
Also, side note but, have you noticed that this season (so far) has had much less ~spicy~ scenes, or just generally less hyper-sexualised content, especially when it came to Yen/Geralt? Even the others, all of the sex scenes felt a lot more "plot relevant", and less "fan-servicey" than in previous seasons, which I for one really appreciate. I feel like before, especially s1, every other scene was an opportunity to show Yen's boobs or Geralt shirtless. Now it feels more, respectful? reigned in? Not that there's anything wrong with it - I'll never say no to a nice titty shot of Henry Cavill - but it can definitely take away the focus from the story, which is a shame because the plot is so rich and there's so much happening.
#i'm very excited for vol 2#also i'm aware that the show is very different from the source material so let's not get into that#the witcher#the witcher spoilers#the witcher season 3#geralt of rivia#yennefer of vengerberg#jaskier#cirilla of cintra
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I quite liked your Witcher!Jaskier short fic! The idea that Calanthe allowed a single Witcher to remain on her lands and the pull of destiny brought them both there even in such different circumstances really caught my interest. Will you be continuing it?
Awww thank you!
Prooobably won't be writing that fic anymore, so I will just tell you what was supposed to happen, hope you don't mind :)
So the base is this: Jaskier once was a witcher of the (redacted) school, but for - apparently - no reason, left everything and everyone he knew behind to serve the crown of Cintra as a personal tool, if you will
Obviously the other witchers didn't like that so they started attacking Jaskier and the crown-wearer (Calanthe's father in this case), verbally and physically
The problem is that Jaskier is mighty strong in this one, like Eskel he's very good at magic stuff, super intelligent and high endurance etc etc - in a way he's the perfect soldier
After to many wichters got fatally wounded or died, Cintra became kind of a no-go-place for them, though every once in a while someone is stupid enough to try and take Jaskier down
The story starts with Geralt entering the cintran palace at Pavetta's betrothal, where he meets Jaskier for the first time and the reader learns about all those things I just told you
Geralt isn't really afraid of Jaskier, (he actually could take him in a fight, I tell you know) but the not-witcher makes him really really uncomfortable for a few reasons, but he's there on a mission
What am I talking about? You see, Pavetta hired Geralt to protect Duny and while Geralt doesn't want to get involved in any of those weird politics, he kinda does need the money she offered him and the curse Duny is under intrigues him
So yeah, Duny appears a la hedgehogman, Calanthe orders Jaskier to kill the monster and Geralt's and Jaskier's swords meet
Peculiarly enough, Geralt wins
Because Jaskier wanted him to
Jaskier, who hasn't said a single word yet, had let his actions speak louder than anything - the problem is, Calanthe who knows what Jaskier looks like when he's fighting, has noticed too
She starts punishing Jaskier, who does nothing to protect himself, so Geralt steps in and his brain short circuits as he calls for the law of surprise - the unborn Ciri is now bound to Geralt and what he doesn't understand yet, so is Jaskier
Years pass, things happen and Cintra goes up in flames
Geralt finds Ciri in a forest, crying over Jaskier, who is heavily wounded after doing everything to protect Ciri, Jaskier sees Geralt, smiles and passes out from blood loss
Geralt tries to take Ciri away to safety but the girl is having none of it, desperately screaming and crying that she won't leave Jaskier, that he's her best friend, that she will do everything to protect him because that's what he has to do for her, because surprise surprise Jaskier is cursed to serve the Cintran Crown until a rightful ruler (with elder blood) sets him free
So now Geralt somehow has to get Ciri and Jaskier to safety (Kaer Morhen), preferably without either of them dying
(this is the part where Yennefer and Triss help and they also discover the whole elder blood discourse etc)
Obviously Geralt and Jaskier fall in love along the way and it turns out that Jaskier has quite the cheerful personality when he's not oppressed by a certain warrior queen and half her courg constantly watching him
He still can't talk, that's part of the curse (to make him a perfect soldier and so on) but he is very quick with paper and ink and over the years Ciri has become quite excellent at interpreting his wild gestures and weird faces
In the beginning the other witchers are definitely not thrilled to suddenly have a hated "traitor" amongst themselves, but with Geralt, Ciri and the sorcerers explaining everything they slooooowly begin to trust him
Then there's this whole thing with a nilfgaardian king that decided to just declare a full on war to every single witcher and it's all vefy dramatic and heartbreaking and there's a lot of cried confessions and then everything goes to shit when said king captures Ciri and she's crowned Queen right there during the battle and suddenly you can hear Jaskier scream her name and she's sobbing and crying as she hears his voice for the first time, thinking it all ends there and that they have lost
But oh, hold on, the curse is broken and with it Jaskier regains a loooot of strength and he berserks across the battlefield like a parent throwing a car off their child with bare hands while simultaneously fighting three bears and a moose
They win because Ciri stabs the shit out of the nilfgaardian king, which also makes her queen of nilfgaard and yeah
Lots of crying, lots of hugs and then there was supposed to be a calm epilog where Ciri is back at the cintran palace where Geralt and Jaskier first met and Jaskier stands by her side as she is traditionally crowned queen and one of the first things she does in front of everybody is bow down to Jaskier
#the witcher#artistsfuneral about the witcher#geraskier#jaskier#geralt#witcher#long post#ask answered
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this was part of an old scrapped comic that will never be, but i find this crack ship idea so sublime that i guess i’ll share it
and as a proud owner of both a kratos and geralt nendoroids they do indeed hold hands on my shelves in what i like to call a pro gaymer move
#kratos#geralt of rivia#the witcher#god of war#moth arts#i am a gamer and that's pretty sad but honestly kratosxgeralt canon now#the comic was ...i don't...#they're just two gay gruff dads raising their kids and fighting monsters#this is dandelion/geralt erasure i'm so sorry to all you bard fuckers out there#me crack shipping this like 'begone twink' even though i'm more familiar with the witcher game dandelion where he's not a twink#i never did finish witcher 3 mostly because i got stuck save-scumming trying to get a fucking card that has a random chance of being awarded#all that i know is i kinda don't like yennefer and triss is best girl sorry not sorry#although....yen/triss...the solution is found...i've been blind all this time
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yeah i followed you back when you posted newsies stuff and i don't know anything about the witcher but ur still a cool person even if i don't understand most of your content lol
okay okay here's a crash course in the witcher:
geralt
needs a nap
the so called witcher the show is named after
hasn't felt an emotion in at least 100 years
horse girl at heart
tired of getting mixed up in peoples bullshit after he killed a bunch of people and got a bad rap for it
kills monsters for a living
vocabulary consists entirely of “fuck” “shit” and “hmm”
yennefer
a sorceress
wants to be a mom but cannot
shoots fire at some assholes
has sexy times with geralt
does not like the ridiculous bard
was born a hunchback with severe scoliosis that got fixed when she became a sorceress
ciri
a princess of a kingdom that no longer exists
does a lot of running from evil dudes trying to kill her
is geralts like sort of adopted kid kind of
magical screams
pretty much every one shes ever loved is dead
a literal child
renfri
another princess
has like some knives and stuff
shames geralt for talking to his horse
has like a fun little gang
gets killed with her fun little gang by geralt
literally only in one ep
roach
geralts horse and best friend
the secret star of the show
best good girl
has all the brain cells
gives geralt boops with her long snoot
puts up with a lot of bullshit
triss
another sorceress
geralts friend
also zaps some bad guys with yennefer
specializes in healing magic
heals geralt once or twice or maybe a bunch of times
generally is slept on and deserves better
dara
an elf
one of the few surviving ones from the elf genocides
has a funky little hat to hide his ears
meets ciri in the woods and they wander around together
saves ciris life a few times
ends up abandoning her to protect himself
calanthe
a queen (like a literal one)
ciris grandma
is also dead
generally kind of a badass
is feared by everyone
invites geralt to sit at her table of honor once
the ridiculous bard jaskier
a bard with a lute and too much to say
follows geralt around like a lost puppy and sings embellished songs about him to fix his reputation
dresses geralt up like a sad silk trader once
gets zapped by a djinn and is therefore disliked by yennefer
wears very bright clothes that are not conducive for travel
is not allowed to touch roach
okay there are like a billion other side characters in the show but im too lazy to list all of them and most of them are villains. but. theres some other fun important people from the games/books that are coming in s2 that are important and they are:
eskel
another witcher
got his training with geralt and they are Bros (or more depending on how you look at it)
has a big ol face scar from a kid he sort of adopted
has a goat (or several)
banged a succubi once for clout
thicc
lambert
yet another witcher
younger than eskel and gerald but still bros
an asshole
friends with another witcher from a different school named aiden who was mentioned once in the games and aparently died but no one can prove that so as far as were all concerned he's alive and theyre dating
generally just a prick
has brain cells but doesnt use them
vesemir
the dad witcher
eskel, geralt and lamberts father figure
kinda like well known and sort of a legend
old as shit
makes sure none of his kids succumb to stupidity
has the braincells
coen
another witcher but from a different school than vesemir, geralt, lambert and eskel
spends winters with all the witcher gang tho
had the chicken pox as a kid
helped to train ciri
died in the books
aparently looks unusual for a witchier
there is also: valdo marx (jaskiers rival), lil bleater (eskels goat), and aiden (lamberts boyfriend even though thats not canon)
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IMO I don't think Yen ever gets better 😬 I dunno if she's the kind of lady who would ever be able to stop chucking jam jars if you know what I mean. I can't tell if it's just shitty writing or bad interpretation on my part, but I really want to claw Yen's eyes out sometimes. Her calling Ciri ugly, even as a ""nickname""was just...... awful. Yen screams at Geralt and he just takes it. But also they seem don't talk about their problems or discuss fidelity expectations and it's kinda uncomfy idk
[part 2]Not that Yen is a bad character by any means!!! I should say. I kinda think that the relationship she and Geralt have is incredibly unhealthy at times, and I never really felt like book!Yen grew into a mother role for Ciri. Maybe as a mentor, but not a parent? Emotionally she's kind of a wreck at all times. I know these are spicy opinions and I should probably read the books through again, but that was my takeaway from my first read-through. Haven't played the games so can't really speak to that
[part 3] Another caveat: i LOVE the fandom interpretation of Yen. Just don't really care for her in canon
Hmmmm. There is definitely issues with how she is written in the story. I mean. This was pretty clearly written by a straight man in the 70′s. Well. I wouldn’t put it that far back but. Progressive for the time. Rough for today.
She does have issues with control and power and anger. They all have shitty coping mechanisms. Geralt, Yennfer, Dandelion. All of them. So I do genuinely worry for Geralt’s safety in that relationship. At least with the versions of her that would throw things. Or hurt him with magic.
Yeah for how ‘communicative’ this Geralt is. Theirs not actually a lot of communication that seems to happen. I can see why every other version of the story just. Had him talk less. When you can See him you need less words to be able to tell the audience what’s happening.
I haven’t seen her call Ciri ugly yet. I’d assumed that it was like a reversal of Daisy saying ‘I hope she grows up pretty and stupid. That’s the best thing a girl can be in this world.’ And Yennefer - as someone who grew up ‘ugly’ is saying the opposite. I hope you grow up ugly and smart. But i can definitely see why it could easily be upsetting or miss it’s mark.
I really hope she does grow into the mother role for Ciri. I need her to. It is so important to me for her character. Game Ciri seems to think of her as mother. If I have to I will be satisfied with that.
And just to be fair- they are all emotional wrecks at all times.
So far Book! Yennefer I feel bad for but don’t want her in a relationship with Geralt.
Hexer! Yennefer I feel Very bad for because honestly from the tiiiiny bit we see of her screams someone in a great deal of pain. And she’s the closest thing we see in that show to Geralt eagerly participating in a sexual/romantic relationship. Still don’t want them in a relationship. Cause I trust that Jaskier with Geralt’s emotional wellbeing and he doesn’t want them to be together.
Game! Yennefer is Badass lady that Geralt CLEARLY adores. but i honestly haven’t seen enough to know if she’s changed meaningfully from the books. I hope so. I want them to be happy. And whatever Triss did in the first game was clearly unforgivable for a lot of people so. Better option? Still wish I could have let him romance Regis instead. They seem like a fitting pair of old men.
Netflix Yennefer Has a Lot of potential for me. She’s clearly been thought out by a team of writers that include actual women. And their discussion to not include Jaskier’s more... repulsive aspects gives me hope that their relationship might grow into something I can enjoy.
Someone said that the Netflix Geralt/Yennefer relationship isn’t a standard romance. It’s a Kink romance. And Netflix Geralt seems to be into it. (He’s clearly got some Game Geralt influences. That is a man who would enjoy the unicorn i think) So. Depending on how things go in season two I could ship them. It’s just. So much of their relationship appears to be based on their Physical attraction to each other and as an Ace I don’t get that at all.
I remain hopeful. And if not. I will continue to enjoy Fanon Yennefer in all her glory.
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