Flip!Trumpet and Regressor!Skeptic Headcanons

Something that sets the Meta Liberation Army apart from other villain groups like the League or the Hassaikai is that they are made up of professionals. Yes, they are Big Bad ProfessionalTM villains—they are going to change society to align with Destro's vision, they have already set the plans in motion, they...also need small time. How else are they to maintain the "well-oiled machine" aspect of the MLA if they don't take proper care of themselves? Given that they all lead rather high-profile lives—the public part of their secret double-life as white collar villains—it's unsurprising that this would come with a lot of stress. What is surprising (or statistically unlikely, if you ask Tomoyasu) is that more than one of them have the same way that they manage all of that stress: regression. Although they do find that it manifests differently for each of them, as is to be expected.

No one is exactly clear on who began regressing first, or even when it started becoming a more common occurrence. All they know is, at some point, it wasn't exactly odd to find someone slipping during the lulls in official MLA business while staying at the villa. If they had to guess they might have said it was Geten, or maybe even Tomoyasu who first started to display some more obvious signs. But there are a few things they are certain of despite the wishy-washy beginnings. Like the fact that Koku is a flip with a fairly wide regression range of anywhere from two to seven, and usually settles at about five when he regresses. Whereas Tomoyasu is very much strictly a regressor and is permanently stuck in his terrible twos, although he maybe reaches his terrible threes on a few rare occasions should the stars be aligned.

Most of the time Koku doesn't mind playing cg to Tomoyasu if Re-Destro or Curious are busy, but the second they ask him to watch Geten at the same time is a different story entirely. Both of them require undivided attention in his opinion and watching them at the same time is a nightmare because someone tends to get jealous and fussy if he isn't getting all the attention. So Koku will absolutely jump from team cg to team regressor for the day, completely checks out and has left the big boy building, thank you very much. He does this out of spite and for the pure joy of knowing he won't have to be the one to clean up whatever the resulting chaos is if he's helping contribute to aforementioned chaos. He's just a little guy, they cannot get mad at him! Even if he did abandon ship on them...no, cannot yell at him, especially when he bats those eyelashes at them all innocent-like. Koku knows what he is doing when he gives the puppy dog eyes; he knows exactly how to play this game and he's going to win.

It's usually during this time that he slips on the smaller end too, a fact that Tomoyasu isn't pleased about. And he will make sure everyone knows that he is displeased. Because whenever they do happen to regress to the same range, it never ends well. Usually this means they'll play nice for about an hour or so, until Tomoyasu's temper gets the better of him—which isn't a difficult state for him to reach, especially when he's small and all those already-big emotions are even bigger. All it really takes is one "inexcusable offense" (typically crimes against his dolls, because Tomoyasu knows that Koku knows he isn't supposed to touch them but he says he can't help it! they're so pretty!) and then he's yanking on Koku's hair accompanied by a litany of no, no, no, no, an act that is met with a screech and his own hair getting tugged on (turnabout being fair play and all). Until, a very short while later, they are both crying and someone has to come separate them. They have cool-down time in separate corners before they have to apologize and try playing nice again.

Conversely, Koku handles acting as the big brother rather well when on the older end of his range, though it isn't clear whether he has a lot of patience or simply is used to Tomoyasu's antics. Probably the latter, given that Tomoyasu can put quite the strain on a person's nerves if they aren't used to how he operates. He can be well into the middle of one of his little hissy fits, huffing and well on the verge of frustration tears and Koku just. Plays along without really discounting whatever it is he's feeling. Taking his toy microphone and conducting a little interview of sorts and working through the tantrum. Asking him at first about whatever has him upset before moving on to a different subject, like what colors he likes or what they should have for lunch, to more specific questions about the dolls he likes so much. Tomoyasu can't really remember what it was that set him off in the first place when he's being prompted with what he would normally describe as asinine questions, if he were feeling bigger that is. As it stands however, he answers the questions (because he's so so good at knowing things!) until there's only the occasional hiccup and sniffle, his fussing forgotten for a time.

When they do collaborate together while small, it can sometimes be dangerous—or at least, dangerous for Daddy's credit card. Borrowing the credit card is their prerogative though, and they can and will use it. It isn't their fault that Curious left the TV on the home shopping network and it happens to be the hour that they are showcasing a lot of very enticing toys. They practically have to use it at that point! Tomoyasu isn't going to argue either as he watches Koku put in the long string of numbers on his phone, especially since he assures him that Mr. Re-Destro won't mind buying him a new LeapPad (which he needs because Geten broke his old one after dropping it in the toilet). It isn't as if they'll get into immediate trouble either and baby brain doesn't exactly work in long-term consequences; it isn't until much later that their little crime is discovered and their new toys revoked for a few days, banished to the cruel fate of having to share the (incredibly sticky) iPad with Geten (who is also incredibly sticky in that special way that only toddlers can achieve).

But rather than any arguing amongst the pair of them over who is to blame for the latest credit card incident (as this sort of incident occurs more often than it should, really), they must instead act as a united front against the true enemy: Geten. They come to the conclusion that it was his fault, since he broke the LeapPad that they just had to get replaced—an argument that had fallen upon deaf ears, unfortunately. Which means they must enact their own form of justice by shunning him. Lest they face another Chocolate Extreme incident, where there were no survivors and everyone was subjected to a bath by the end of it. No, they won't be playing with him or the yucky iPad, and instead are gunning for Re-Destro's phone (given that their own were confiscated once again due to their shopping spree). Somehow they do manage to get their hands on it and Tomoyasu unlocks it for them using his rather impressive hacking skills (i.e., remembering the pattern to swipe). Their mission successful, they are going to download so many games, they are...immediately buying more LeapPads, per Tomoyasu's request for another since the new one was confiscated and Koku's desire to show-off how well he can operate the phone. They might learn their lesson this next time. Maybe. And so the cycle is complete, and they can return to their regularly scheduled MLA business come Monday.

🌙 Character Paci 15/?: Chikazoku Tomoyasu 🌙