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emptymanuscript · 4 years

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One way to REname a character with internal story logic

I want to talk a moment about Zephyr.

Not the wind.

My character.

(He wishes he was this tough) Not even really the person but his NAME itself, Zephyr, and how it changed.

One of the things I don’t mention too much just to avoid trouble is how extremely different Knights of Day is now compared to how it was originally. At its early height, Knights of Day peaked at 4 authors. The goal was in no way to publish or publicize any of it. It wasn’t even really meant to be any sort of cohesive story. Or even to consist of cohesive stories rather than “adventures” for fun. I’m not even sure I can tell you WHAT it was. It wasn’t quite a piece of fiction, it wasn’t quite a table top rpg, it wasn’t quite rp’ing. It was just its own behemoth of a thing that included all of those. Compared to 1 book and 1 book in progress now.

Case in point: Fun Adventure #3 was ~

Kinda John Edward but real & real evil

Set up: Most Mediums are terrible people who fake their powers to rip victims off when they’re at their most emotionally vulnerable. Because when you’ve just irrevocably lost one of the most important people in your life you’ll pay anything or do anything for the even the illusion of getting them back.

What if: Imagine someone who can really do everything they say they can do… but they’re still a terrible predator trying to take advantage of people when they’re at their most emotionally vulnerable - they just have more power to make it even worse.

Mission: Save young suddenly widowed mega-rich heiress Helena Lawson from real Medium but still conniving con-man Kenton Dean. Because the greedy, racist, no goo Ted Lawson doesn’t want Kenton Dean to get the money instead of himself. And Ted is willing to pay exorbitantly to make sure it doesn’t. So James and Zeferrello are tasked with finding any reason to separate Helena and Kenton.

Twist: Yeah, Kenton Dean CAN summon and control the dead but it’s so much worse than that. He can summon and control the GOD of the dead. Assuming, of course, that all of this isn’t the god of the dead actually controlling Kenton Dean for its own purposes.

Which Became The Hidden and the Maiden. But instead of a climactic conflict between James, Zephyr, Kenton Dean, and Kherty-Aken decided by force, force of will, and clever use of all magic available inside the seat of Kenton Dean’s power, his theater, “Kinda John Edward but real & real evil” ended with a mildly tense chat between James and Zefferello versus Kherty Aken just kinda hanging out, tensely, next to an ambulance. James points out that Kenton Dean has reprogrammed Kherty Aken like a computer to just believe all this BS. Kherty Aken realizes, Oh Shi-! he’s right, and flys away. Next day, paper says Kenton Dean is dead. So the general idea is there but just not at all the same when you look close.

As an aside, this is by the way why most writing teachers dismiss ‘ideas’ as the least important element of story telling. One version of this ‘idea’ I stuff under a rug and pretend doesn’t exist. The other I sell in paperback for $10 a pop. If the fundamental idea hasn’t changed really, why the vast difference in price? Because of the execution. And if execution is more than infinitely greater in effect 0 -> 10 why bother putting that much effort into the idea when, even if you only go to 5 through execution, that will have more effect than any idea will. I am not 100% convinced by this line of reasoning but it’s not meritless either. A bad idea well written will just get more in the marketplace of ideas than a good idea poorly written. A bad idea badly written is doomed. A good idea well written may or may not do as well as the mediocrity. So, I disagree that it is of zero importance but I do think it is certainly not the most important element for 3/4’s of all story types. Ok, that’s another post, enough asides.

The real thing I’m actually thinking about is the Zefferello to Zephyr change. Zefferello was Zephyr’s original name. The author who created the original character said specifically her thoughts were that she had never had any character under any situation whose name started with Z. So she wanted a Z character and she plucked the rest out of thin air because. And because it didn’t matter, that was cool enough. So he was Zefferello for the first few years of life. No particular reason why. Never mind that nothing in any back round of anything anywhere would give Zefferello as a name.

It was only as I was moving from the first to the second draft of The Hidden and the Maiden that it was really bothering me about this Korean-American dude with the abusive Super Whitey Mega Rich father, the utterly absent and possibly dead Korean Trophy Wife mother, and the abusive DID having ghost but still white mother. Why would any of them give him that name?

Well, the father might do it just to torture his son throughout life. He’s that kind of asshole. As little as he is in it, I actually think of Zephyr’s father as the Antagonist for Knights of Day because he is just pure dagnasty evil because he likes it. He may not appear most on the page or wield the most power - partially because he’s just not my favorite kind of villain, at all, his side-kicks is way more my speed - but there’s no denying he does the most damage. BUT, the father is also very image conscious. Part of what he likes is doing terrible things while other people praise him for it. For making people suffer but having no one believe them because he is such a paragon of virtue. One of his side kicks actually got James to just start punching him toward the end because he kept talking about what a saint Zephyr’s father was and all the haters just didn’t understand what a wonderful person he was and how hard he worked when he never had to to improve the life of others. If I recall correctly James literally held a knife on the guy and pointing to Zephyr: ‘you had to fucking know what that motherfucker was doing to him! You evil lying sack of fucking shit!’ So… torture wasn’t going to work for a reason.

So I’m looking for any great people in history with the name Zefferello. Nope. Nada. Is it by some miracle a Korean name that Eun Ae Gwon might have given him? Nope. No dice. And slowly all eyes turn to JJ. JJ is nuts. There’s no getting around it. But I’m rarely happy with that as an explanation. Especially with JJ because most of what she does that SEEMS nuts, isn’t. The fundamental rule I made for JJ fairly early on is that she is ALWAYS up to something. She is playing every angle. She is working every leverage. She is a survivor in a way that most people will never be. She’s dead and she is still playing to win. So she will do things that appear unreasonable at point A in time in order to increase her odds of getting what she wants in point B in time.

And I’m looking at that name. That ello. That’s sounds latinate to me. And masculine. I already knew Zefferello’s real name at this point, and it had a Jr. at the end and I started wondering if maybe, just maybe, JJ gave Zefferello a different Jr. name. A name for the father that she wished Zefferello had. Instead of the one he did. He’s hers, and what better to claim a baby she would never hold than to rename him into a family that she wanted to exist but never did. That’s very JJ.

At which point I’m reviewing JJ’s history. It’s sparse-ish at that time. But I know when she got pregnant and I know more or less what happened to her from that point until she died. And there’s nothing in there to hint at a Zefferello Sr. But… there were already some hints about there maybe being a Zefferella. And of course that’s not a name either. But fiddle with the spelling and drop the “el” sound and you do get a Greek female name: Zephyra \

And that was the lightning bolt of inspiration and change. That JJ’s second and last love of her life was a fellow prostitute named Zephyra, and IF JJ could rewrite reality to be anything she wanted then her son would also be Zephyra’s - that they would be the family unit and the other would be the ghostly illusion. And with Zephyra as a real name, I also had a male equivalent: Zephyr. Sounds similar but much more plausible that he might somehow obtain it. Plus, with the idea of Zephyra, his name also becomes a key to unlocking tons of emotion and backstory.

And you’ll know it’s important the second that this repressed little guy walking around giving out the name of Zephyr Wayne, shamefully cringe-admits that his legal name is Peter Bailey Jr. That that exists at all says that there is a story to find down in there and that it isn’t a simple one.

So that’s one to rewrite a name based on the internal logic of a story. Zephyr’s name was researched and found but never picked out of a name directory. It was back-engineered to tell the story I wanted to tell and avoid the random story I didn’t. By following the logic that might lead to a name like his, I was able to find the one I thought was right for him.

And, since the original Cup Bearer was one of the winds, that also worked to my advantage… though it is generally considered the wrong wind. Oy. Which I’ll probably just end up deleting because Zephyr’s name is better for a story hook than anything I made with Thulebelore being the General of the Western Winds.

If you actually got here. Wow. Thank you. If you ever want to solicit writing advice, dropping a question in my ask prompts me better than whatever happens to occur randomly to my head. So, you know, that’s there.

#Knights of Day #Zephyr #The Hidden and the Maiden #Writing advice #writeblr #writeblogging #unsolicited advice

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emptymanuscript · 2 years

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When I was in college, the plum job given to the most senior journalism students working at the school newspaper was the weather report.

Generally, no one cared about the weather. It was going to be nice. So the weather report became this tiny column of philosophy and random musings.

In some ways, I always wanted to write a weather report on here. I used to think about doing the Wire Island Weather Report, since a significant chunk of Wire Island, including Isles University, is based on the town I went to college in… and now live in again.

Then, in some ways, I think essentially all my posts are pretty much the Wire Island Weather Report, it’s a blog, what the hell is it if it isn’t odd ramblings and things I find interesting.

And then I think about how messed up the world of Knights of Day is. And I have to wonder if some break in reality is somehow publishing some version of my latest wall of text to the Isles University student newspaper as the weather report.

That would actually probably be a fairly accurate emotional weather report for Wire Island.

“Welp, weather report has JJ in it today, all students are advised that they have a three way even chance of too much sex, too much violence, or too many tears.”

“Golly, morose musings about Bonelfoermos and Thulebelore’s tragic love story in the weather report. Expect to have reasons to mope today. Buy your ice cream now.”

“Weather report is all politics and rage today. Expect everyone emotions to run high for at least the next three days. Students daring beach front partying are reminded of the dangers of alcohol poisoning and hate sex.”

“We’ve got Thulima! Tonight’s basketball game is going to be epic! Go Gauchos Misioneros!”

“Today’s Weather Report is about the Weather report. Very meta. It’s going to be a long strange day my peeps.”

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emptymanuscript · 2 years

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Thulima

When the Great Races turned on eachother, each sought new advantages to tip the fortunes of war in their favor. The Mighty magicked up lesser children, copies of themselves, so they could fight their multitude of foes with even numbers, even if the even numbers were cannon fodder compared to the other Great Races. To make them better warriors four Mighty wove them into a new independent child race, the race that would become humans.

The first spell, which all other copied, produced Thulima, her hair the color of her father’s fire.

The spell was done by four Mighty but Thulebelore put the most of his own essence into her, so she is considered his eldest daughter. There was no doubt she was his favored daughter, and to the rage of many of her sisters, she was the favorite of others, certainly the most beloved of Bonelfoermos, her father’s soul mate.

Unfortunately, her pride of place as eldest and most favored daughter also earned her the right to be first to die when the peace between the Mighty and the Gods demanded Human mortality as a price. But Thulima bent even that to her advantage. She plotted against her and her sister’s husband, The Hidden King, taking from him much of his own power for herself and her descendents. And she fought so well in the underworld by night that she earned herself and her sisters a place on the Sun’s barge to be resurrected each Dawn as one of the lesser Knights of Day to serve still with her father at the right hand of Sol Invictus.

Over the ages, Thulima has grown from a soldier into a wise warrior Queen, a great lady still laying long plans for victory on behalf of her descendents, growing the once minor race of Humanity into a world ruling behemoth, benefactor of her relentlessness, cunning, and a might worthy of her fathers.

While she does not actually appear herself, Thulima is referred to by her (post fall of the Sun’s “perfect” Kingdom) title in The Hidden and the Maiden. The Hidden is her husband. They’re separated. She made sure of that.

#Thulima #the knights of day #mood board

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emptymanuscript · 2 years

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Dulzon, Last Unsworn

Since he is supposed to be in the Eshu Adventure, I figured I would make a mood board for Dulzon.

One of the few remaining first generation Mighty, Dulzon is older than matter. He was one of the contenders for High King of the Mighty and let it go to go be a pacifist, meditating at the edges of creation. Or as much of a pacifist as a Mighty can be. He forged the peace between the Mighty and the Gods by threatening to eat Sol Invictus’s eyes if the High King of the Gods didn’t accept his surrender.

He is one of the four original creators of the spell that made humanity. While Thulebelore is the one given the most credit, the first woman, first to die, was as much his daughter as anybody’s. And he spends most of his time these days in human form. Mostly to not upset his father - The First Father, The Father of Lies, Father of Us All - who has a bit of dementia, whom he now serves as Acolyte.

The face claim for Dulzon has been Samuel L. Jackson since day one, since I’ve always pictured Dulzon as a Moth Seraph (see the movie “The Cave Man’s Valentine” for Jackson’s relation to Moth Seraphs) in his matterless form and a moth white dragon of unfathomable hugeness in his true body. But he also spends time living as a bum in the abandoned/never used subways in Wire Island, keeping an eye on things in a way no one will look for.

The title of Last Unsworn comes from the deal struck by the Gods and Mighty. Mighty could swear to a god to be the most honored of servants. Dulzon made the deal and pretty much all the surviving Mighty took it. Except Dulzon who wasn’t going to lower himself to serve a god. There’s a bit of resentment to the title. Dulzon is “respected” but not well liked by most.

#dulzon #dulzon last unsworn #the knights of day #Queued Post

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emptymanuscript · 2 years

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The Extremely Brief History of The Knights of Day so far...

Before the beginning there were the First. They were assholes. But largely they were happy.

A few of the unhappy ones said fuck that, we’re gonna make our own reality. Lates! And they locked up all the rest of the First and did what they set out to do.

The First that started our reality had a bunch of brats. The Fae. The Mighty. The Titans. The Gods. The Kherty (Death Gods). The Last Child. And... somebody murdered the First Mother before she could have any more. Because it is NOT a clown car! This made everyone very sad.

The other First were so sad they said “Lates!” again and scarpered.

Everyone else said, wait, they’re coming back right?

They did not come back.

So the High King of the Mighty decided he was the biggest asshole left and declared himself King of everything. This made everyone mad. So everybody tried to kill eachother.

Dulzon, the one guy ballsy enough to tell the High King of the Mighty to his face that the power grab was a bad idea (and got exiled for it), finaly gets called back when the Mighty realize they’re not going to win the war. They want him to broker a peace deal with the Gods because the Gods seem moderately reasonable.

Dulzon just fucking surrenders. Goddamnit, Dulzon.

But Dulzon has with him Bonerlfoermos, Thulebelore, and Thulima (Thulebelore’s eldest kinda a little bit mortal already daughter). They impress the King of the Gods so much He agrees that the Mighty can be allowed to swear to the Gods as honored servants. So they do. All except Dulzon (heavy finger quotes) “Last Unsworn”. Goddamnit, Dulzon.

The Gods and the Mighty together kick everyone else’s asses. Gods rule the universe. The... end well... not really the end. Because there are plenty of people left who are terribly unhappy. So the High King of the Gods Multiiverse sends Bonelfoermos out to kill them all.

Bonelfoermos gets tired of this job because he’s killing lots of old friends. He also gets a little tired of the fact that the High King is sleeping with his soulmate, Thulebelore.

So they give the High King the finger. Suck it Sol Invictus!

Sol Invictus, High King of Every Fucking Thing, loses His shit.

He not only kills Bonelforemos and Thulebelore (and casts their daughters forever into the underworld to be perma-mortal - good luck with that) he curses them that they have to live ten thousand mortal lifetimes before they can ever think about trying to come back to life for realsies. Because He KNOWS those bastards are going to try. Goddamn Mighty.

Their first mortal incarnation, they blow up Heaven. This is why Dragons are bad, mmm’kay. The mortality is really leaching in by then though, so they only blow up Atlantis the second go around. This is why everyone wants to kill Dragons because fucking really?!??!! Are you serious right now??!

Ancient Human history unfolds and everyone politely pretends that the Gods made Humanity and gave them all their blessings and that the Mighty (or anybody else) had zero to do with it because the Mighty cause too much shit and Sol Invictus wants everyone to worship Him anyway.

Illiaraden, who is really too powerless a Mighty for anyone to care about normally, finds Jesus. Literally. She just walks off the job and devotes her myriad incarnations to serving Jesus as she remembers Him. The God Illiaraden is sworn to doesn’t even notice.

Plenty of other Mighty take this as a sign that they can just go, too, as long as they’re quiet about it. And they’re right. Because the Gods are too busy squabbling with eachother to notice what even their supposedly honored servants are up to.

Life goes on, Humans become so populous and widespread that they literally drive everything else out of the mundane worlds into the connective space between because there just isn’t room. The Gods are dumb enough to think this isn’t a problem because they’ve never lived in the mundane worlds. They’ve mostly, purposefully, forgotten that the Mighty made Humans and Humans are just mortals anyway, so who cares. All the really important stuff, they’ve got a handle on. Let the Humans do their thing.

May 8th, 2007, a regular old Human lets the Hidden King, the eldest and most powerful of the Kherty, out of the cage he got locked in to for everyone else’s safety. Because the Kherty, as a whole, are not ok with anything but them having ultimate authority over the universe. This might not have been so bad except... the sonovabitch doesn’t put the Hidden King back. He just keeps the Death God as a servant to run silly little errands for him. Well... shit.

The events of The Hidden and the Maiden occur May 9th to May 11th, 2008.

I think I am writing about August 2008 ish now. There may or may not be an orgy at sea.

This has been your end of the year catchup. Happy New Year. Many happy writing days ahead to all.

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emptymanuscript · 6 years

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So now the really big question: what do I do with my break?

I could just forge ahead with the prelim work for Book 3, which I should prepare you all, the working title is a little horrendous. It’s currently called Project Golden Abortion.

I could start a totally different book, that actually has nothing to do with any incarnation of Bonelfoermos or Thulebelore. I’ve got a couple of ideas floating around, one even has a few pages started.

I could write a short story. For which I have zero ideas but, you know, it might be cool to finish whatever I start in the break.

I could actually not write and devote myself to other tasks. Which I have to do a little bit anyway. :p The new tax season is coming. :p

#just my life #tw: abortion #watch me work

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emptymanuscript · 7 years

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World building June - Belated Day 7

Gender/Sexuality

Woops missed a day. I’ll have to do another later.

I've spent the most time on Mighty gender and sexuality. Mighty change sex as part of their lifecycle. Mighty have approximately five sexes, though they culturally recognize six. The five sexes are neuter, male, female, super-male, and super-female. The sixth that Mighty recognize culturally is the child sex which Mighty see as different from an adult neuter but biologically all Mighty are born neuter. Mighty tend to switch sex frequently while young adults but eventually settle into a favorite gender with only occasional divergences.

The most notable gender role is that Super-males in particular are associated with child rearing, to the point that anyone who is Super-male is expected to be engaged in the activity or vying for the position to do so. Exceptions usually face severe cultural disapproval and censure. Other genders are allowed to assist in child rearing activities but the bulk of it goes to Super-males. This is why the ancestral term for progenitors among Mighty tends to be “Father” since biological caretaking is culturally taboo.

Neuter adults are stereotyped as the cleverest gender. Males are stereotyped to be more aggressive than the other genders. Females are stereotyped to be physically stronger than the other genders. Super-females are stereotyped to be the most metaphysically powerful gender. Super-males are stereotyped as the most patient and relaxed. These cultural stereotypes don't bare intense scrutiny as they rarely hold up to careful examination, though male and super-male territoriality do tend to provoke them more easily to anger than the other three genders and super-males have more than their fare share of opportunity to learn patience.

Leadership positions are generally held by Super-females, Super-males, and Neuter adults. Neuters are generally the politicians of the Mighty as they act as go betweens for Super-females and Super-males who are too instinctually territorial to talk to others of their own sex safely without risk of aggression.

Mighty are usually serial lovers, two or a few getting together when it suits them and then going their separate ways. An affair can last for one encounter up to a several months. Mighty that are particularly close might reconnect many times over their lives but the idea of monogamy is an oddity to Mighty, even for the purposes of reproduction. Thulebelore and Bonelfoermos are infamous among their race for being a permanent pair even if others are occasionally involved just because that isn't the way the culture works.

Another interesting note for gender roles is that the suggestion that a Mighty can't change gender is somewhat derogatory, implying a lack of power and flexibility. Even though it is common for individuals to have a favored gender, to stay a particular gender for a long period of time, and to experience difficulty changing gender both if they have stayed a single one too long or they have reached an advanced age. The suggestion that a Mighty is incapable, rather than unwilling, to be a Super-female or Super-male is asking for a very serious fight right then and there.

#wbj #world building june #worldbuildingjune #worldbuilding june #worldbuilding #knights of day

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emptymanuscript · 7 years

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World Building June - Day 16

Family Structure

This actually dovetails off of yesterday pretty well because originally, political and cultural power was identical for the Mighty. Now cultural powers have very little to no political influence. Even the terms have largely passed away.

The major three positions were King (always a Super Male), Queen (always a Super Female), and Voice (most usually a neuter but technically could be any).

Kings, Pa'askeig in Mighty, were the main political autocrats of a region, tasked with dominion over the physical world, but most importantly for raising the children of every subject under his command as siblings. The King was quite literally the father of the state, every child raised in his dominion was raised by him and every child born in his dominion was given over to him to raise, so he was effectively father to everyone. Really, single parent to everyone.

Queens, Ma'askthul in Mighty, were secondary political autocrats of a region tasked with dominion over the metaphysical world, but most importantly for making a conduit for the passing of things unseen – be that magic or the children of subjects so that the King will never know whose child he might be raising so he can't show it favoritism or disdain. Part of her job was the keeping of secrets and lieing to get desired results when the truth wouldn't work. She was also a tutor in places where the King was lacking. A lot of her job though was simply channeling energy to the kids. Which got her a lot of prestige because that was considered a very taxing and draining job. Spending time with the children was often seen as the reward for all she did. Queens tended to hold their positions for relatively much shorter durations than Kings but it was also generally agreed that Queens went on to make the best Kings.

Voices (which is very hard to reproduce with english letters, ba'atli is the best I can do without IPA and it isn't very good) were the true political power of an area. A voice is sworn to a king or a queen or more rarely both and speaks for them. Most often that meant that a voice made the actual political decisions with the benign acceptance of the king and queen who were occupied with more important matters. As the Mighty slipped more and more under direct personal control of the gods it became ever more “just” a Super Male father raising the kids with a Super Female mother making sure they were spiritually ok. It's still a valued job but the power ends at the edge of their home. Politics is all divine. They too, though, got the “reward” of being tutors and favored godparents to the children of the kingdom.

So family structure most often ended up with a core nucleus of a creche of children raised by a King, with a Queen as sort of a close beloved aunt figure (Kings and Queens are allies, not mates), and then two godparents, with older siblings and cousins occasionally dropping in to help tutor and train the creche when their skills would be useful.

An important cultural taboo that often moves the core nucleus on is that those four most parental figures are never allowed to raise their own children. For a King or Queen to put their own children into the creche is reason for other Mighty to gang up and kill them. Culturally this has pretty much moved to the King and Queen just not mating while they hold the position. So they'll leave their position to do that and then their children can end up being reared by the next King and Queen.

Mating is a fairly temporary thing for Mighty and isn't really a family structure because of that. There isn't a standard structure beyond that a Mighty need a female and a male in order to form the body of a Mighty child. After that requirement Mighty pretty much do what they want. And it'll probably be different next time around. Of particular note is Bonelfoermos and Thulebelore who were notorious for essentially being a mated pair, they were thought of as unusual because of their over fondness for each other and not being with other people. A mating pair or group will usually stay together from the decision to get together until the birth of a child.

After the birth of the child it is one of the parents responsibility to take it to their Queen to be given to the creche. Usually even the Queen isn't told the other people involved, to make it easier for her to keep the secret. And because no one ever sees what their child really looks like and most children stay confined inside for a significant portion of their early years, pretty much any child of the approximately right age could be theirs, leading to the cultural expectation to treat all the children of their King as their own. Pretty much any Mighty that doesn't ADORE Mighty children, all Mighty children, is considered odd. Because they could be yours or a sibling or a cousin or something. But don't think too well of them. Mighty are also cannibalistic and they do eat children that aren't developing to their standards. They consider that good for the kids, seeing it as allowing them to be reborn better next time. And yes, most usually that is done by the King, with the Queen second, it is a parental duty.

#wbj #world building june #worldbuildingjune #worldbuilding june #worldbuilding #knights of day

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