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#THIS IS SO FUNNYL TO ME
adaricruz · 8 months
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enaelyork · 1 year
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BLUE - A Thrawn x Tarkin daughter OC (reader) Fanfic [Part 1 - The Ghost]
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Agent E. Tarkin X Grand Admiral Thrawn
[+18 ONLY]
A lot of TW English is not my native speak
--
Chap prompt :
During her older sister's wedding, Eleanore Tarkin suffers the consequences of her reckless actions and comes close to death. Until the arrival of a strange Grand admiral
For the first post click here
1. Eleanore
In my family, we all have a propensity for destruction.
It's a philosophy instilled in us from an early age, first by preventing us from grasping what the word feeling means. Then, Eriadu takes away the part of humanity that we have left. Allowing us to detach ourselves from the world of the living. We are there to succeed and this triumph leads irremediably to the loss of others.
But I never did anything like everyone else.
This is how I explain my tendency to focus this destruction on myself rather than on the universe in general. My person being easier to access and the impact on others much less considerable. Yet what is happening to me tonight is beyond my control, I swear. It's bad enough to choose your older sister's wedding to try to die, even when the family tradition is to ruin everything you touch.
That'll teach me to want to steal my dad's stuff, including the drinks they send him. I had decided to swallow it in one go to avenge myself for his indifference and currently I feel totter between nausea and lack of oxygen. The teenage crisis was ten years ago, Eléanore, you should know that we don't touch dad's business, especially when it's an eminent governor of the empire who wants to offer it to him.
I needed to feel alive. It was so funnyl that I burst out laughing alone, telling myself that I spent most of my life putting myself in danger. Integrating the empire's secret services was part of my provocative strategy, as was my irresistible urge to contradict everyone. The taste for danger, the indifference of my existence and yet tonight I wanted to live.
Such a shit.
At this point, my heart no longer knows whether it should beat fast or slow down. Beads of sweat bead on my forehead and I'm sure my face is catching fire in the freezing air. It's probably my loud cough that's drawing attention, because my trachea is retracting and it's almost impossible for me to breathe normally.
And I hit him.
Was I still walking? To stagger, to crawl? In any case, this is how I met the ghost. I called him like that because he had this deep blue spectral complexion and a white uniform, like the sheets of the ghosts of my childhood. And his eyes fascinated me.
- Damn, you are both beautiful and terrifying!
I don't have a damn idea how he reacts, but he's not leaving, that's pretty good news. Although, when you have blue skin and red eyes, nothing should scare us, including the half-crazy one who laughs at her agony. His lava-colored orbs deflect towards my hand and back at me, making me wonder why I'm missing the air.
-What can make me see your skin so blue?
He chuckles in a monotonous and serious tone. The timbre of his voice is incarnated tranquility, self-control in excellence.
-It's not what's in your glass that affects my appearance. What did you swallow?
-Something that wasn’t for me.
I still have enough lucidity for not say too much. I don't know who he is and it's better for him that he doesn't know my identity. Anyway, everyone wants everyone dead here, nothing is too good to win favor with the emperor, not even a corpse.
His hands rest on my cheeks and he pulls me closer to him, leaning down to examine my pupils. It must be absolute darkness in my eyes, because the effect of this contact has on me is absolutely insane. Was there an aphrodisiac in that glass?
-How long ago did you ingest this substance?
His tone remains peaceful, but something must have changed in his features, I guess behind a slightly more troubled vision. I gather my thoughts, my eyesight begins to derail dangerously, the barrier I'm leaning over blurs, and he pulls me into a more secluded space to allow me to kneel on the floor.
-Less than five minutes.
I'm cold, I'm hot, my legs are a kind of spinning material unable to hold the rest of my body upright.
-Are you sure ?
-It's the only thing i know.
And the fact that he is clearly not human. So why is he wearing an imperial white uniform? Only prestigious officers wear it, and the empire is not one to ennoble the unhuman.
-You need to see a medic droid right now.
- No ... please. No, not that.
They must not know, no one must know. Don't make waves, don't draw attention to me. I will never be forgiven.
-In this case, you will have to make you vomit. -Dying is a good option too. Your hands are warm and you look friendly. - Lean into this basin.
That's it yeah. After all, a wedding is more of a great opportunity to die stupidly. I'd rather think about my fate than even consider for a second sticking a finger in my mouth.
- My fingers ? In my mouth ? No way !
That's good, my life is coming to an end, it limits opportunities.
-I'll have to do it for you, then.
He's not serious? Oh, yes, he is, I can't see much in his red eyes, but the wrinkle that forms under his forehead marks his determination. I'm completely screwed and I'm probably going to die in it. Facing this extinguished fountain, he leans my head down to allow me to remove the poison more easily. Something happens then, when the placid cold around me gives way to the warmth of his body against mine. He gently brushes my hair back, his fingertips brushing my skin with stunning delicacy. Despite the urgency of the situation, it does not lack sweetness and it stirs something deep inside me and I can't explain it.
- May i ?
I am speechless, my trachea choking with the poison that oppresses me. Unless it's him. His imposing body and the coldness of his insignia which is flattened against the bare skin of my shoulders.
- Close your eyes, it will go faster.
And I don't have time to react when his movement already hits my glottis and causes a lightning vomiting reflex. Everything that comes out of my stomach is dark and slimy and even though the pain that pierces my insides tears me in two, I feel a real relief there.
Several nauseas manage me to spit out what was forming in the hollow of my bowels and slowly, my heart resumes a normal rhythm. It's finish. I know that in such a short time what was in the glass had no time to reach anything but my stomach and although the pain was still unbearable the rest of my body won the battle.
My mind is different.
Cause apart from this awkward situation and the fact that I just threw up, I find this situation, the way my body fits into his, particularly erotic. He is a hardened soldier, my evening dress is not thick enough to prevent me from feeling his build under his costume. The fact that he is not moving, that he has barely moved away to let me vomit, arouses doubt in me, the idea that he is not so indifferent to it either.
- It's done.
- Already ?
What a stupid question. Our eyes meet for a moment and my lips still tremble from the shock I just suffered. For a moment I believe, I hope, that he touches me again. But instead, the ghost stands up and detaches itself from me, giving way to this coldness that characterizes me so much.
- How do you feel ?
Horribly, I thought for a moment to sex with a non-human, despite my situation. Nothing is going anymore.
- Nauseous.
- Nothing out of the ordinary.
-Horribly frozen.
-Drink some water from the fountain over there. And if you feel bad tomorrow, see a doctor droid.
-As you order, Doctor GreatBlue.
I watch him rinse his hands and not even the water washes away his skin tone. He doesn't say a word, turns around and leaves me in my disarray. Time to prepare myself, to let my palpitations calm down and to discern what is real or not in what has just happened.
Despite the water I've just swallowed, I still tremble when I reach the grand ballroom where my sister's guests are feasting on the best imperial dishes.
No trace of him.
-Oh my god, honey, where have you been?"
A hand rests on my shoulder and my fiancé's big caramel eyes hit me as hard as a collision of ships. It brings me back to reality, that and his perfume with acid notes that he sprays on himself outrageously every day.
- Where were you ? You slipped again! We are looking for you everywhere! Your father is furious.
Dying, poisoned by the drink they wanted to give my father. He should be thanking me instead of spitting on me like that. Erwin Spencer is a young prodigy in the Imperial Army. A brilliant academic, admiral in the marine and he rose as an instructor for trains pilots and future recruits alongside me in our training unit.
He's also the man I'm going to marry. An agreement his family and mine made to guarantee him a bright future in the shadow of Tarkin's influence. And, as usual when it comes to major decisions in my life, I had no say in the face of my father's authority.
-The speech is ready, I hope?
I shake my head, absent, my gaze wanders around the large room and the lights are still very blurred. Am I still under the effect of the poison? Is there something else confusing me so much. His hand slips into mine and I let myself be drawn into this tragic current that takes me to the head table.
-You better not shame us tonight, El'. If I learn that you have consumed spices, I will inform your father immediately.
Like a torrent trying to break the dam, I feel my emotions catching up with me. Nothing human, we said, yet what constricts my throat and blurs my vision is all my humanity about to scream for help. Then, suddenly, the world stops turning and I see him again.
The ghost.
He is facing me and although we are far apart, I am convinced that he has seen me. That he perceived what crossed my eyes and from behind I recognize the silhouette of Colonel Yularen at his side. This moment is fleeting, but it seems endless in its intensity.
The ghost saw my tears.
And it is no longer the poison that squeezes my heart.
[Next]
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ashe in front of his family's grave (they all have one grave for some reason): 😢😢
richard: auyayayyayaya it's aparty in the usa! hi ashe. do you reembef that one time when we were at a school tirp and then it was sooooooo cold! me and matty didn't care but you were freeeeeeeeeeeezing! i could see you shvering and shaking. it was so funnyl, we weren't eeven sorry for laughing! hahaha...sorory, ashe! we just could'nt helep ourelves!
ashe: Shut up, Richard. I'm so sick of this. Every single time I'm having a moment by myself, you always find me somehow...and sing Party in the USA...and tell me a story about something that didn't even happen...and...and...
richard: woaho! what's wrong? hahaha... *slaps ashe ontheback relaly ahrd* i waws just trying to lighten the mooood! what's thematter?
ashe: 😟
this is an actual canon interaction between them seen in ashe's conclusion/j
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gracematelli · 1 year
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Watch "Dont touch me l#So cute l#Funnyl#Funnyanimalsl animals l@akirafactchannel" on YouTube
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kimmiethered · 1 year
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Watch "Dont touch me l#So cute l#Funnyl#Funnyanimalsl animals l@akirafactchannel" on YouTube
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spookyhugsandkisses · 4 years
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More of the creepypasta au(?)/Coven au(?) I know I said this before, but I like the beauty and beast dynamic/trope, and the power of love. Sometimes a show will get that one dark season
Damien translation(s):
"Hey, Joy."
"Hey, Doll, I got a meeting with my Dads. Could be awhile."
"Love you too, Vicky. See ya soon, have fun with the witch."
(Inspired by a creepypasta ROs mod.)
----0----
One of the Covens' most popular season was the most intense one they've ever been through.
There were close calls.
They spent every episode following a trail of destruction left by the big bed.
There was the big bad's sidekick. Who spent her every waking moment throwing them off his trail.
There was the big bad himself. They didn't learn his name until the two-part finale, but he was always a lingering thought in the back of there minds. They saw the aftermath of wherever he caused destruction.
But in the center of it all, was their nonhuman sidekick for the season. The coven owes her, even though she sees it otherwise.
----0----
Joy stands inside a circle drawn using chalk, waiting.
Hope is finishing drawing the pentagram inside the circle.
Faith was placing candles, lit, on the outside.
"You sure you're okay with going alone?" Faith asks. "We could all go."
"Yeah, I'm sure," Joy says, nodding her head. "I need to make sure she's okay, and I know that more than one of us would make suspicious."
Hope groans, "he's so paranoid."
"You can't help but get a little protective of her though, "Faith smiles, a small one, and then lights the last candle.
Joy shakes her head, smiling. Even she got protective of their old friend.
"Just in case," Hope tosses Joy a small bottle of holy water and then says, "Say hi for us?"
Joy catches the bottle just as Faith sets the final candle outside the circle. She pulls out a small vial, full of blood, and pours a drop on the outer ring.
The circle starts to glow, and the lights in the room shut off.
The candles seem to glow brighter.
Joy's body starts to tingle.
Faith says, "Let her know we got all her letters and that we miss her."
Joy nods, "you got it."
There's a flash of red, and then she's gone.
----0----
At first, Joy feels like she's fly; the air moving around her makes her feel like that.
But in reality, she's falling.
She casts a levitation spell and floats to the ground below. She gathers her bearings and takes a quick look around. The area surprisingly is very green; her feet crunch under grass. Right in front of her lay rows of roses.
"Joy?"
Joy smiles at the voice behind her and turns around.
A girl made of stitches stares at her in shock.
"Hey, Vick," Joy says with a grin.
The girl, Vicky, sprints over to her and slams into Joy, hugging her tight.
"Joy!" Vicky squeals, "What are you doing here? Where are Faith and Hope?"
"I'm Visiting you, obviously," Joy says, laughing. "Faith and hope are busy, but they say h-"
A shadow suddenly falls over them.
Joy looks over Vicky's shoulder and meets the eyes of a Demon. Joy tightens her grip.
A melting halo.
A torso that bleeds eternally.
Eyes, and a permanent smile, that glowed white.
Damien Lavey. The prince of Hell.
Last seasons big bad.
Vicky's boyfriend.
A flower crown, made of daisies, sits atop his head. It would have been funnyl had Joy not witness the destruction he caused in the past.
"Damien, Joy came to visit!" Vicky chirps, breaking the tension.
Damiens voice echoes in Joys mind as he speaks, ""̴̨̋H̸̩̀e̴͍̊y̴͖̚,̵̥̽ ̵̡̂j̵̬̓o̵̪͠y̶̠̔.̸̻͝"̵̼͊"
"Mhmm." Joy esponds, she can hear the smugness in his voice.
Damien tilts his head in Vicky's direction.
"̸͉̈H̵̝͊e̶̼̾y̷̲̎,̵͈̕ ̴̩͑D̴̨̃o̷̡̓l̶͇̈́l̴̦͠,̷̗͝ ̵̞́I̶̖͆ ̷̤̄g̴͓̚o̸̰͗t̸̨̓ ̶̣̆ȃ̸̘ ̶̣̀m̷̥͠e̸̠̒e̵̜͒t̸̜͂ì̸̡n̴̰͝g̴̼͑ ̸̢̛w̷̱̽ì̴̱t̴͇̐h̶̘̿ ̵̟̎m̸̪̒ȳ̸̯ ̷̲̆Ḍ̸̿a̷̡̓d̸̮̓s̵̗̓.̷̝̐ ̴̙́C̴̟͘ȯ̶͓u̷̖̔ļ̸̂d̷̻̒ ̸̳́b̷͓̀e̸̖̒ ̴̗̊ă̶̠w̸̫̍h̴̡́i̶̫̓l̶͕̓ė̸̪.̶̜̏"̸̦̀ Damien says.
"No problem," Vicky says, releasing joy from her hold.
She walks over to him and stands one her tiptoes, him kneeling a bit, and kisses his cheek.
Vicky then hugs him snuggling to his chest, "Love you!"
"̴̨͝L̶͂ͅó̸͎v̸̱͒è̸̤ ̴͈̚y̷̘̎o̶̞͝u̴͓̾ ̵̩̔t̷̠͝o̶̭͘ǒ̸̯,̵̼́ ̸͇͆V̶͇̐į̵̾c̷̫͐k̴̭͆y̶̕ͅ.̴̻͂ ̸̨̛S̶̡̊e̶̥͗ẽ̴͙ ̵͓̃ỹ̶̤a̶͉͋ ̸̹̚s̸͕̈́o̸̠͐o̶̲͊n̷͙̍,̸̮̎ ̸̙̈ĥ̷͔ã̷͖v̶̻͆e̷̼̍ ̵̑͜f̵̮͘u̴̹͗n̵̺͆ ̸̥̅w̵̻͌i̷̠͑t̶̥̔h̵̢͑ ̷͉̆t̷͓͆h̴͈͂e̷̫͠ ̷͙̃w̷͔̅i̷̻̿ţ̴́c̶̲͝h̴̲̍.̶͕̐"̵̗͑
He takes a step back and disappears in a burst of flames.
Vicky turns around and grins at Joy, "So, fill me in, how have you guys been?"
-------0-------
Damiens sidekick is actually Amira. She's a mercnary hired by Damiens dads to mess with the coven.
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princesseblade · 6 years
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Pam I know you dont do star wars but the whole 'fandom swearing up and down the sexual tension between the space hotties is actually them very platonically related' is giving me flashbacks. People are so funnyl
Lotura has them shook, they really out here grasping at straws to justify why the ship is bad and are so fucking scared  and mad because their ship didn’t get anything bubhooobub please. It’d be funny if it wasn’t so annoying.
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datesfordummies · 7 years
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hi please teach me how to effortlessly flirt i'm so bad at it i'm too obvious, rough, or funnyl it's bad plz help ily
well, if you feel like you are too rough and obvious then that’s actually kinda makes things easier because you can always take away when there is too much but you can’t devise more of what isn’t there. so you have some flirty, friendly confidence in you it’s just a matter of channeling it. i think you might be letting nervous energy take over and that’s why you over do it. try calming down as much as you can around a crush (which i know is hard) and just remember less is more! try listening more so that you can impress them by subtly remembering and bringing up things they told you but also remember, no one needs a smooth operator. some people might love how you flirt now!
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