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#Slamming my head against a wall idc at this point all my friends are ignoring me and mh doc stopped me off on of my vital mental meds
whimsidollie · 1 year
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Girls im this [] close to joining random ass discords and the like just to get attention bc holy shit
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jungnoir · 6 years
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are you accepting requests? if you are, please write fluff for jaemin or jisung from nct!! idc what but i noticed they don’t have anything and i love them uwu thanks
friends to lovers!jaemin and jisung
a/n: I’m not accepting requests but… I’m also bored and stuck on everything else so here’s this tiny thing
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⎡JAEMIN⎦
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the annoying spicy best friend and boy next door until senior year
you guys lived right next to each other so of course you always hung out!! despite going to the same school and spending the whole day together already, you spend even more time with each other when you get home
you’d beg your parents to allow you both to play in the front yard and kick balls around or play hide and seek in jaemin’s huge backyard until dinner time and even sometimes past that
as you both got older, you’d get to hang out later, so you’d both chill in jaemin’s hammock in the late evening because you both were small enough to fit and tell each other funny or scary stories while the bugs left bites littered over your arms and legs (not that you really cared until you went home and couldn’t stop scratching)
you never thought of jaemin in a different way, though everyone else thought you did
play fights were commonplace between you two so whenever you’d get particularly rough with each other ur friends would be like “lol there go the lovebirds
and it was gross
it was…
gross
?
it was gross up until high school when your hormones kicked in and hey. jaemin is kinda gross. you still remember when he used to plant boogers on your locker handle or tackle you in sweaty arms if he lost to you in a game of kiddy basketball
but now jaemin doesn’t look like scrawny, stinky little jaemin anymore
no, now he can pick you up off the ground with two arms around your waist and laugh in your ear about how you should be more aware of your surroundings
now when he ruffles your hair he follows up with gently patting down the stray hairs, both hands smoothing down from the crown of your hair to the tops of your ears to the curve of your neck
now when he gives you those dark, mischievous eyes and asks “can I stay over tonight?” you can’t say you don’t shiver
you remember a time when you both were so young and so close that your parents would give you baths together for pete’s sake
and now you can’t even stand in your bedroom, ten feet away from each other, and look each other in the eye
he sits on your bed, slouched and flipping through channels on your tv
but when he sees you enter in just a pair of shorts and a giant shirt (his, though it’s been years since he’d last seen it)… he doesn’t quite remember what he was so focused on doing a few seconds ago
“…did you find a movie?” you ask softly, padding over to the other side of your bed as he immediately sits up and draws his long limbs to his sides
“oh! uh… no dice. maybe we should just rewatch something you have here?”
you shrug, point to the popcorn he’s got on your nightstand, and allow yourself a silent heave of air when he’s not looking your way anymore
he retrieves a movie you two have watched so many times before that you can recite the words together and not miss a beat
so it. it feels different tonight. somehow
there’s just a bowl of popcorn separating your hands from finding the other’s and this odd tension in the air that was birthed the minute you walked into your room after telling jaemin you were just gonna “change into something movie night-worthy”
you two don’t end up throwing yourselves over each other like usual, being deliberately annoying and clingy just to make the other person laugh
the movie is about halfway through when jaemin suddenly moves the popcorn to the floor and rolls onto his side, resting his head on his fist as he stares at you
“what?” you ask, v aware of the warmth he’s giving off now that there’s no barrier between you
“nothing”
“it’s gotta be something if you’re just staring at me for no reason” you drag your knees up to your chest to somehow make yourself smaller under his gaze, even to bury your cheeks between your knees so that you could make sure he didn’t see the little twitch in your lip, the want to laugh nervously or spout out some ridiculousness to get him to stop looking at you building up in your tummy
“can’t I just look at you for no reason?” he scoots a little closer, maybe attempting to look funny to you as he says this but,,, he’s doing a really bad job of it
because he doesn’t look funny. if anything, he looks kind of… what is the word?
you bite your lip, “sorry, gotta pay to look”
“what’s your preferred currency, honey?”
oh my GOD shut up jaemin
you push at his chest, trying to ignore how your hand annoyingly remembers the mold of it even after you’d touched him
“silence” you joke, watching as he licks his lips and sits up so that he’s level with you
he reaches forward and cups your chin, glancing between your eyes and your lips
he isn’t even subtle about it
your mouth parts unconsciously, a sudden understanding to this tension you’ve both been feeling hitting you hard
jaemin resists the urge to run his thumb over your bottom lip when it gets released from you teeth, if only to spend this next moment looking at your face
and he’s not even surprised that you can feel it too
“you’ll have to be specific, there’s all kinds of silence”
you don’t know what this is
no, scratch that, you know exactly what it is, but you don’t know if you want to admit it to yourself yet
maybe you could get away with that for now
neither of you would hold it against the other if you just. tried it out once, right?
and so you lean in that much closer, breaths mingling unavoidably now
“getting specific enough for you?”
of course not
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⎡JISUNG⎦
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idk why i’m so obsessed with this visual of gamer!jisung but hear me out
gamer!jisung, best friends with your best friends aka the other dreamies, but probably the only one you can never get close to
besides the fact he’s a certified bully to the boys, you’re the only one that he isn’t… silly with
like he’ll have renjun in a headlock and then make eye contact with you and the mood immediately dies
you’ve asked each of the boys what the problem might be
are u scary? are u not his type of person to hang around? was he still put off by that time you body slammed mark into a wall?
ok you didn’t actually body slam him but he swears he felt his feet leave the ground for a moment
not your fault he has the weight of a singular macaroni noodle
jisung always talks to you respectfully and if he can, talks to you through the others
it wasn’t… fun… having jisung treat you this way
he was always your favorite not that you have favorites *ahem* forgive me, donghyuck *ahem* so it was v :///// u know
you really wanted him to be able to treat you like he treated the other boys!! because you’d gladly treat him the way you treat the others if only you had the CHANCE
or at least you’d like to know why he didn’t so you could have some kind of closure
jisung happens to run a gaming club at school, and with permission, the “club” (which mainly consisted of all of you) would stay behind after classes and play together in one of the abandoned classrooms
you always had to play against the others bc jisung never wanted to give anyone (you) the floor to challenge him
so one day, you just decide that you’ll sit in and observe jisung play against donghyuck in overwatch
and donghyuck is obliterating jisung
you’ve never seen donghyuck this good, getting excited enough to run over to donghyuck’s side and cheer him on
you place your hand on donghyuck’s shoulder
and jisung looks away from the screen for just one second to see it
right then, donghyuck destroys jisung with a victorious yell
of course, you’re both caught up in the excitement of the moment so the first person he hugs is you
and this is pretty normal for you guys; between wrestling around and being affectionate, it was never weird to receive a hug from anyone except jisung
then you hear a controller clatter to the floor and by the time you’ve peeled away from donghyuck at the loud sound, you see jisung storming out of the classroom
the other boys looked shocked, some even looking between each other, unsure what to do
you notice chenle about to offer to go after him when you stop him, “i’ll go calm him down… he’s probably just upset about the match, you know how he gets”
chenle nods for you to go, gnawing lightly on his bottom lip
you find jisung sitting on the stairs outside the school exit, his head resting in his hands as the evening grows later
the sun nearly blinds you as you move to sit next to him, mulling over what to say
after all, you two weren’t that close in the first place. surely you were the last person he wanted to see right now
without looking up, jisung begins grumbling, “I know, okay? you don’t have to lecture me about it”
you blink
you weren’t planning to lecture him at all!
“I know that it’s stupid to get upset but the game was getting to me and-”
you’re about to cut him off, tell him it’s okay, that it’s just a game and some people get upset about those things but that you all knew it wasn’t that deep
“-you know how much I’m crushing on (y/n)… when I saw them cheering for hyuck, I just lost all focus. it’s pathetic. I wish I could just man up and tell them instead of avoiding them all the time”
oh
jisung… didn’t know it was you
he sounds so distraught too, like he was upset he let himself get angry, upset he let you see him show emotion
you place a hand on jisung’s shoulder and instantly he tenses. you think it’s because he wasn’t expecting a touch but it’s because he knows this hand doesn’t belong to the others
so it had to be…
“it’s not pathetic. if anything is pathetic, it’s that it’s taken donghyuck this long to finally win against you in a game, and even then, you were distracted so it technically doesn’t count”
jisung raises his head and his eyes look rimmed red, frustrated
but his expression is gentle when he sees the caring look on your face
“…hyuck would kill you if he heard that” he mumbles, looking down at his hands
you just giggle and bump his shoulder with yours, “ah, I know. but he also knows you’re my favorite so…”
jisung looks back up at you in shock. “f-favorite?”
you hum, moving your hand from his shoulder to the one furthest from you, wrapping an arm around him so that he has to lean into you. he’s never been so close but it’s. nice. your shampoo smells. nice 
“you don’t think it’s weird? what I said?” jisung looks a little mortified when he remembers that he’d just confessed to you, albeit unknowingly, and you were acting like everything was ok
you look back over to him and shake your head, “not at all… I hope this means you’ll stop avoiding me, though”
jisung doesn’t know how to feel at first; he had always assumed that telling you about his crush would either result in you returning his feelings or cutting off all contact with him
but instead, you don’t do either. you just watch the sunset with him, holding onto him
he also sees that you’re just as wonderful as he thought you’d be. you haven’t told him that you return his feelings but he doesn’t feel terrible at all. if anything, he feels ten times lighter after realizing he never had to hide from you in the first place
he checks to see that you’ll let him before wrapping his arm around your waist and offering you a sheepish smile, “sounds good to me”
besides, he may think you don’t return his feelings, but it’s just a matter of time until he realizes the truth about that too
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