#Self-Portrait with Hawk & Armada
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for all of March I've felt the water rising
& I've measured what I knew.
Emily Skaja, Self-Portrait with Hawk & Armada
#Emily Skaja#Self-Portrait with Hawk & Armada#Brute#March#water#water rising#knowledge#American poetry#poetry#poetry quotes#quotes#quotes blog#literary quotes#literature quotes#literature#book quotes#books#words#text
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Emily Skaja, from “Self-Portrait With Hawk & Armada”, Brute
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Oh hawk after hawk over Indiana—
are you watching me
break up on bed after white bed sobbing,
doing all the dishes
except the one his mouth touched,
burying my grief
in the thaw-wet yard,
turning mud into water miraculous?
What are you here to collect?
Spring, I can see, is in full effect
allowing grass-reeds-wild-river-
birch-flood-plains & even robins
are compelled by the way this
broke the hell out of that’s ripped heart.
Slow. I’m taking it with Ecclesiastes.
A time for a time for a time.
Yes, hawk, the winter was disappointing,
but we’ve left scraps.
Beetles have arrived like shorn locusts
shedding what I remember
of the summer when the trees buzzed with wings & shells
the leaves alive / alive
it leaves the problem of remembering
without erasing it—
for all of March I’ve felt the water rising
& I’ve measured what I knew.
Oh hawk, what’s your damage—
are you here to pick the bones
of the years I laid waste to
like I never loved a thing? So be it.
I see the beetles march across the linoleum
& I let them.
Can’t feed young trees to the chipper
can’t suck the dirt out of my nails
but I can stand here reciting all the words I have
over the hole & that’s what’s left—
Done with the whole dark
& the insect dirge
under blue lit lamps.
Done trying to remember
June, first stars & August
when I was Penelope
when I was Eurydice
when July was missing
& I was my own dull shade.
Listen to me, I’m not hiding it—
I’m swimming out to meet the boats
coming armed up the river
& I wish he were watching
through a lead-black fog.
I had his book of exits learned by heart.
I thought I knew it.
Self Portrait with Hawk & Armada by Emily Skaja
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are you here to pick the bones
of the years I laid waste to
like I never loved a thing? So be it.
— Emily Skaja, from “Self-Portrait With Hawk & Armada,” Brute
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I had his book of exists learned by heart. I thought I knew it.
Emily Skaja, “Self-Portrait with Hawk & Armada” from Brute
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Done trying to remember
June, first stars & August
when I was Penelope
when I was Eurydice
when July was missing
& I was my own dull shade.
Emily Skaja, Self-Portrait with Hawk & Armada
#Emily Skaja#Brute#summer#summer quotes#June#July#August#Penelope#Eurydice#memory#poetry#poetry quotes#American poetry#quotes#quotes blog#literary quotes#literature quotes#literature
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