#I'm absolutely ranting right now
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Hey quick question, why the fuck was everyone angry at sword and shield for being ugly, rushed pokemon games but was pretty much completely fine with Scarlett and Violet being worse?
#simon says#I'm absolutely ranting right now#I'm trying out pokemon violet (using a friend's copy) and I am still so iffy on it#because this game is... so fucking ugly and poorly optimized#and I still remember the backlack sword and shield got for the fucking trees#this game... is worse#it's worse!#and it didn't get nearly as much backlash#sword and shield still get shit to this day but scarlet and violet get to just... move on??#I'm honestly so upset#Galar looks so much better compared to sword and shield#people are saying the gameplay is what makes Scarlett and Violet worth it but I'm just... not seeing it so far???#just#OUGH#sword and shield I just sorta forget about#like they're not awful it's just easy to kinda forget about them and not play them#but Scarlet and Violet so far make me want to just turn off the game and play a 2D pokemon game instead#sword and shield's biggest crime is being forgettable#scarlet and violet are actively infuriating#they can't keep doing this
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THE BEST OF SHENKO 1/?
The end of the world has a way of reminding you of all the things you forgot to say do.
Mass Effect: Legendary Edition (2021)
#mira makes gifs ✨#kaidan alenko#sophie shepard#EDI#shenko#fshenko#mass effect#mass effect legendary edition#dailygaming#OTP: you're real enough for me#i learned i am physically incapable of creating less than like 20 gifs at a time#but shenko stonks are up right now!!#gif’ing my favorite bisexuals gives me joy 🥹#even though ME2 is dry as shit for shenko content like it’s literally the sahara desert#like a whole ass 10 minutes max of cutscenes between shep and kaidan like come on#like 2 minutes in the prologue and like 8 minutes of cutscenes on horizon#and then an email and looking at the picture in your cabin before the suicide mission#i'm so sorry y'all ME2 shenko canon is absolute shit (besides kaidan being rightfully angry on horizon) which is why we ✨ignore it✨ 🥰#but i rant about ME2 VS treatment too much so i will not write another essay about it in the tags#i will say the EDI line isn't the exact quote from the game but i think about it a lot tbf#same with the quote i borrowed from anderson too lmao (which is also a tiny bit paraphrased)#i just love EDI asking shep for relationship advice when you get to follow shep and kaidan's relationship/struggles across 3 games#and anderson's quote about all the things you forgot to do in relation kahlee to is just *chef's kiss* when you think about shenko#like whether it starts in ME1 or ME3 shenko has some really fantastic moments across the series#two characters with strong morals who realize that they're falling in love and literally start to become each other's strength??#their soft place to land?? their support when they need it?? shenko will always have my heart#also the shenko quotes you get are the most fire thing in the world#you're real enough for me?? you make me feel human?? i want to be your strength- your soft place to land?? shenko you will always be famous#I FORGOT IM GONNA FIGHT LIKE HELL FOR THE CHANCE TO HOLD YOU AGAIN TOO LIKE??#but i’ll stop ranting now bc i do that wayyy to much in my tags lol. have a good day wherever you are! <3
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#ranting in the tags like a big whiny baby#reminder to myself never to cross post a story to tumblr again#getting interaction from only one person on a fic is a big oof (don't get me wrong tho I absolutely eat that interaction up)#and i hate having to tag people to have anyone see it because then I feel like i'm forcing them to read and i dont want to do that either#writing a 70k word fic over the course of 6 months and not having the fandom interact with it at all because its not x reader hurts too#the lack of interaction is a big ouchie to the pride#makes me feel like i'm stuck being a one trick pony with kit if i want anyone to be interested in my stuff#but then i also cant just write smut all day either#writing for my self just isn't all that much fun right now. I love my story but I want others to love it too.#gotta suck it up and keep on keeping on. at least AO3 readers got my back
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just finished reading the hunger games trilogy and when i tell you it changed me
#screaming my head off#it destroyed me emotionally SO MUCH#but the writing is soooo good oh my god.#absolute blast#yet. i hate suzanne collins for supporting israel#honestly - SPOILER#the scene in book 3 where the capitol blew up a fucking hospital reminded me so much about the horrible crimes happening in gaza#and knowing collins got her inspo from the iraqi war (which i know quite a lot of#being born in iraq with iraqi parents)#i really hoped shed be aware of the shit going on and a supporter of palestine#because GOD the parallels are so?? strong??#mind you one of them is a bestselling dystopian trilogy and the other IS A GENOCIDE HAPPENING RIGHT NOW.#i'm still enjoying the hunger games as a media - but i definetly am not a supporter of collins#uhhh yeah sorry for the politics rant#hamocrap
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so even though i pick favorites, i pretty much ship any and all the yellowjackets girls, but you guys also get in a mood where you can only think about one ship and can't deal with any other ships getting in the way of that one???
#like. i always ship lottielee. and it usually Doesn't get in the way of shipping lottienat#but today??? oh it absolutely fucking does#and it's so annoying!!! i'm reading this incredible fic and i love it SO MUCH and i signed up for it knowing it was a lottienat fic but????#somehow i'm getting so annoyed at the lottinat moments??? 😭😭 i'm like this isn't working literally where the hell is laura lee??????#girl she's NOT going to show up????#why am i upset about reading lottienat in a lottienat fic come on what am i doing 😭😭😭 the fic is perfect why am i like this#i love lottienat! you know i love lottienat i've written lottineat before!#but i'm in too much of a lottielee mood :((( i can't do this right now :(((#okay dumb rant over thanks for reading <3
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So because I just got this anon:
I'm gonna disable anon asks for now. If you have stupid bullshit to say to me then I'd at least like to know who is saying it. If you wanna be antisemitic sooo badly then don't be a coward
#what the fuck are you even talking about anon???#you know i'd go on a whole rant right now but i'm tired and i have a headache so i'm not going to do that#but just know that this anon has absolutely no idea what they're talking about#also like#i just want to enjoy my esc in peace#leave me alone#antisemitism
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*pst* imagine rolling down a hill with foul legacy, it just sounds amazing and cute I can just imagine his armour getting filled with grass and then getting it out and or just both of you getting itchy and laughing after it all 🥰
🍑 anon
ohhhhh wait wait WAIT what if Foul Legacy has grass/pollen allergies???
you reach the bottom of the hill and he sits up and starts sneezing!! he's trying valiantly to brush off the grass from himself and your hair but he just can't stop sneezing!!! you have to go over and help him get all the grass off and you're trying so hard not to laugh but his sneezes are both funny and absolutely adorable. he whines pitifully as you chuckle and remove the grass from his hair and fluff, and once you're both finally grass-free he buries his face into your shoulder and sulks. you'll see him giving the field glares, even sticking his tongue out when he thinks you're not looking!!! because it was so fun rolling down the hill but IT MADE HIM SNEEZE >:OOO
#genshin impact#childe#tartaglia#foul legacy#foul legacy childe#genshin tartagalia#genshin childe#genshin tartaglia#chit chat#🍑 anon#SORRY ANON I'M HIJACKING THE TAGS TO RANT#ok so the thing i was sad about last night ended up sorta happening today????#but like??? strangely i am not that sad????#i dunno if my brain was preparing for it or if it'll hit me later (i hope not)#i kinda suspect that because i've been slowly suffering this past month or so i was already expecting/used to it????#or maybe it's because i went through something similar a while ago that hurt arguably more???#so this time it's like 'please this is nothing'????#man i am so confused like yes it hurts but all the hurt was spread out so i'm not. hurting that much right now#like my brain is just 'buddy i've been hurting for a while you really can't do much more'#wild. absolutely wild#maybe it's 'cause i got kinda closure so now i can stop worrying about it#anyways i cried last night haha how's everyone today#ALSO I KEPT MY PROMISE I GOT SOMETHING OUT THIS MORNING (it's short but i was distracted i'm sorryyyy ;-;;)#short scenario#other's stuff#morning call
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#alright these tags are super embarrassing but i needed to rant publicly so uh. you can read this but please don't perceive me too much#it is so fucking exhausting having nobody to share my life with#i have literally zero friends at this point bc ever since my grandpa died i've pretty much stopped trying to keep in touch with my hometown#friends and i cut off my 'friend' group that were racist assholes who treated me like a doormat back in october and haven't really made any#close friends at college since. and i just fucking hate that this is the same way i've felt for so many fucking years like you'd think it#would be bearable at this point and i'd be used to being alone and for a while i honestly was but it just hit me tonight how fucking lonely#i am and how tomorrow i have to keep on just doing the shit i have to do in life without anyone to talk to and share it with#other than my mom who's been pissing me off lately so i've been pushing her away too!#it's so tiring to have to go out and do things and have responsibilities everyday and not being able to share that with anyone idk it makes#it feel almost like i'm carrying the weight of the world on my shoulders which is SO dramatic i know#like today i wanted to talk about the stupid false alarm gas leak thing with my sort of friends in this club i'm in but i didn't get to talk#to anyone at the meeting bc everyone was just talking amongst themselves in their little groups of best friends and it just reminded me that#i don't have that and i've never fucking had that i've only ever pretended i had that#it's like all these years i've been pretending to be a person that has friends and knows how to live life normally but i never have#more than anything i just miss my friends from home bc they're the closest i've ever felt to having friends that are like family but. i#don't know how to talk to them anymore. i didn't tell any of them when my grandpa died and i think they just assumed that i've moved on so#they've probably moved on and i already know that they have their own lives and friends at their schools that are a lot more full than mine#wanna know the worst part about all of this? i just had therapy and basically told her everything's fine#and i won't meet with her again until 3 weeks from now so literally the only person i can talk to about this right now is my mom#which i am absolutely not gonna do bc she's gonna get so scared and worried for me and i can't have that rn#anyways yeah. this isn't even that big of a deal like i haven't had friends for at least the past 6 months it's not like anything's changed#i just feel extra sad about it right now. i need a distraction stat gonna go watch watch some tv goodnight#shut up hanna
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feeling like a total asshole today 👍
#an aunt's mom passed away yesterday night#i didn't really know her that much just spoke to her a few times for the typical merry christmas & happy new year you know#so when my mom told me i felt bad for my aunt bc i knew they were really close but i don't feel SAD#but my parents seemed to be like so shocked and sad and my little brother even started crying#and i felt absolutely nothing#idek what my mom saw in my face but she went like 'don't you feel anything?' and like wtf am i supposed to feel#like. i'm sorry for my aunt and everything but i just?????#that already made me feel like an absolute asshole but now we have to go there (like 2hours away by car)#and because i am an adult now i *have* to go to the funeral home (?) today and to the funeral tomorrow#and i REALLY don't want to and thought it's making me so fucking anxious bc i haven't been there since my grandma passed away 2 years ago#i really don't want that feeling that i felt back then to come back#not right now#not when i've been starting to feel a bit better this past week#but i'm already failing at that because they started to come back the moment i was told i have to go#and i feel like a fucking asshole because my aunt's mom literally passed away and she (and her whole family) must be heartbroken right now#and all i can think about is that i'm anxious#i'm anxious to go back there. i'm anxious just thinking that i'll have to express my condolences to people that i don't even know#i'm anxious because i'll have to TALK to people and at least try to look a bit SAD but i can't just fake it#bc if i don't look sad my brain tells me that i'm an asshole that doesn't have feelings like apparently everyone around me has#but if i fake it my brain tells me that i'm an asshole bc why tf do i have to fake my fucking personality#why can't i just express my fucking feelings like normal people do and the only thing that i know how to do is fucking complain#like. i know i rant a lot here but it's literally the only place where i talk about my feelings#i NEVER talk about my feelings with anyone because idk HOW to do it#i have like a million things in my mind that i want to tell my mom or my therapy for example but when i finally convince myself to do it#i just CAN'T. the thoughts won't leave my mouth because i don't know how to phrase them properly#so nothing ever leaves my mind unless i make a post here bc apparently writing my thoughts in english (my 2nd language)#is easier than talking in spanish#and at least if i write them here they don't just stay bottled up in my mind#but i'm too tired of myself and my stupid brain that tells me that i do everything wrong :/#i'm gonna shut up now bc i once again reached the tag limit
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the way im paying £9250 per year for my professors to screenshot a textbook, paste it onto slides, and read from the slides for an hour. then i buy the textbook for £4.44 on ebay and its much easier to learn from than any of my lectures
#i can literally just read it and learn. for 4 quid#biomed eng#sorry for ranting i don't go here anymore i'm just#sick of it#reallyy want to drop out i am so close to my limit#there's so little joy left from anything in the vast range of stuff i have to study right now#this textbook subject (physiology) included#when i get to build a circuit with my hands or do maths or something it's so nice. otherwise absolute shit#it has sucked the fun from an incredible field/discipline/career whatever and is now sucking the life out of me#😭😭😭 srry for the dramatics i need to listen to sle//ep t/oken RIGHt now
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I keep seeing like 5 different ways that people are wanting to help tumblr, change tumblr or fight against tumblr and I have still yet to see anyone make any concrete ideas as to what it is people are supposed to do in order to keep the site from being monetized & become something it's not.
If the site does not pay off it's debt, it will eventually cease to exist. If you don't petition for change, it will continue to label queer bodies as mature and sexual, continue to remove BIPOC folk from it's premise and continue to allow white supremacists to infiltrate this site.
So what's the options? What are we supposed to do? How are we supposed to change a site without everyone sitting down and actually talking about what change means and how to get there?
I see so many people just tossing out ideas that in theory do work in one way or another, but might not fix all the problems so there HAS to be something that can fix things without disenfranchising half the communities on this site?
There's so many "don't do this, this hurts these people and now your a horrible person for suggesting this thing." When most the people on this site have no idea who most of each other are and why or how it would effect people.
Give actual insight as to what could be done to get Staff to pick up their fucking big boy pants and do their job. Going around and telling people that they are horrible people for trying to suggest a solution or the people who share those solutions in an attempt to help isn't going to help anyone.
This isn't aimed at one post or idea in particular either, I've seen NUMEROUS ideas floating around that in theory could work for one thing or another and all there is, is people shooting these ideas down without actually backing up with something that might work.
Half the people on this site are children who have no idea how websites work on a corporate level, the other half are adults who've been on this site since they were children and just want the site to stay online and not disappear. There's disabled people who need this site (I'm one of them) to keep having a social life, there's artists who need this site to contuse having any form of recognition, there's writers who've got their entire portfolio on here and people who's entire blogs are dedicated to helping queer and trans kids learn about themselves and communities dedicated to finding people like themselves so they don't feel so alone in this world.
So what is it? What are we supposed to do? Without money the site fades away, with strikes you completely disenfranchise entire groups of people, without fighting against the staffs changes, current policies and lack of care about the white supremacists and TERFS that run rampant then people are still going to get harassed, reported into the ground and completely removed from the site for no reasons at all.
So if you have any fucking ideas then please actually tell people because at this point, everyone's trying to not get people to do one thing or another and yet no one is backing up these ideas with actual action that will work.
#Tator Rants#I'm just exhausted with how everyone fucking yells at each other for coming up with ideas that might do something#and then hound anyone who doesn't understand how these things work just because they tried to spread a word about something potentially wor#working*#so either come up with a plan or stop shaming random fucking users for hoping to find a fix#it's not going to help just shooting absolutely every idea down from the sky#EXPLAIN why things wont work#We all know funding this site isn't going to change policies but it would keep the site afloat#we all know that striking the site would lead to profit drop and push the staff to change things but it would disenfranchise entire groups#so suggest something that works because right now everyone's just yelling at each other while#tumblr still gets to pull it's bullshit by hurting people and plotting to monetize the site to hell and back
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I have regrets
#do not go into the mdl comment section#i should know better and yet#i have seen some truly horrifying things this night#and i know it's for a show that i am not a fan of#but my concerns are about how casually racist and lowkey homophobic some of the comments are#without any self awareness about it at all#saw someone say that the writing sucks but that's fine because you can't expect good writing out of thailand because it's a small market#and i'm just like pARDON me??? there is AMAZING writing coming out of thailand#just because you watch shit shows doesn't mean they're all shit what in the absolute shit is that?#if i was feeling feistier i would call them out on it#but i used up all of my fight earlier at work because [redacted] department sucks and i hope they get told off#for screwing over me and my coworker who doesn't seem as annoyed as i am but now i have no energy#but that's some shit to just casually say you won't ever expect good writing out of thailand#when uwma and bed friend and triage and 1000 stars and so many more exist#and that's just bl so what the fuck are you going to write off an ENTIRE country saying they can't write? absolutely the fuck not#i hope that person stubs their toe and then right when it starts to feel a bit better they stub it again#i hope their pens always have barely any ink so they have to struggle to write anything#i hope they never get to have wonderfully delicious thai food ever again#and they can only ever eat midwestern casseroles that are more jello than anything else#oh these tags are long oops i guess i'll end my rant here
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i'm probably the only one on here who's extremely excited about summer night lmao
#it's in my top 3 series that i'm looking forward to the most from the 2024 pt1 line up#next to the trainee and pluto#aaaaanyway i'm absolutely DYING to see dunk without joong#and i'm also excited to see him act opposite a girl#i'm even more excited about it now that i sat my mom down in front of hidden agenda#and we were also rewatching simm this week (we actually watched it live as it aired)#dunk works so well with joong like. they complement each other so perfectly#and i'm SO curious to see if dunk will manage with different acting partners#there's actually many things that he does where i'm like. yeah. i think he'll do well even without joong#and i just need to know if i'm right about it#for months i've been saying dunk is a better actor than fandom gives him credit for#it feels like summer night will be the series that'll prove it to me#or maybe i'll be proven wrong idk#that's what i'm dying to find out. will i be right about dunk's acting skills?? or will i be wrong??#if i end up being right tho then i might just go off tho#(we'll see. maybe i'll just rant to my mother in private)#hidden agenda and various stage performances already got me into the dunk protection squad#but if summer night proves me right then i WILL turn into mama bear if i see people shit on his acting#and that's that on that#airenyah plappert#summer night#adrm#this rant was brought to you by: dunk posting about the summer night fitting#bye
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me: yeah so we haven't had a meeting about it yet, but I asked my coworkers about past interns and why they left; chances are they won't hire me full time at my internship immediately. However, the chances of having it extended are pretty good, and I like what I'm doing, and they're going to be talking about budget in July. Sure my finances are a little tight but--
my sperm donor (only slightly exaggerated): look for a new job immediately and tell them if they won't hire you full time you're leaving. and no, I don't care if you don't find something in your industry and you have to settle for a job that will make you hate being alive even more than you already do. Also I'm going to ignore how long it took you to find this internship to begin with
me:
#dylawa rambles#dylawa rants#this man gives zero fucks about actually seeing me go into what I fucking trained to do he just wants me to make him money#i am literally sick to my stomach right now thinking about job hunting again#'i want to see you successful and happy' okay why are you still charging me rent then#why are you making job hunting even more of a traumatic experience than it already is#literally said to him 'I don't trust my chances of finding a new job within two months' and his response: 'oh well go work customer service#it took me MONTHS to find just this internship and it's a miracle it's paid at all#it's in a nice office with nice people and i have my own computer and they feed me almost daily!#i'll live another six months in this hellhole if it means I get a guaranteed post-internship job like this#is it the ideal job? absolutely the hell not#the commute sucks i don't have work from home so i can't get away with doing other shit on the side#i feel limited in what the role requires of me vs what I'd like to make#but good fuck it's better than food service or retail#but nooooo he needs me to be his little rent cash cow without him feeling guilty about it#very tempted to bail even if it means I start eating through my savings a little bit#I don't know if I can go through the daily interrogations of 'did you apply? why aren't you hearing back? it's your fault' again#i have somewhere to go but I'm trying to keep it very 'last resort' territory#A) it would make my current work commute twice as long#B) it would require completely burning bridges with my old man bc I'd have to move out in secret#not just because i don't want him to know where the people who are sheltering me live#but also because if he saw that place even if he was willingly letting me move out he'd say 'absolutely not'#because I don't trust him not to do something weird. not necessarily DANGEROUS but. weird.#I want to burn all bridges someday!#but even now that I own my car it's still not the safest course of action#I'm so sick of being stuck dawg!#dylawa vents
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Hate hate hate when a migraine has pain (plus light and/or sound sensitivity) that's juuuust bad enough so I can't turn on a fave show or movie to help with the "I'm in pain while sitting the dark all alone but can't get to sleep" boredom
#the pain isn't the worst symptom right now and I'm really glad most of the aura numbness subsided when the pain started#because i couldn't really use or feel my hand for like 30-45 minutes which was... unpleasant#but fuck the dizziness and nausea are brutal#and I've also gone from absolutely exhausted and barely staying awake to almost wide awake since the pain started#so i can't sleep and i can't do anything and i hate it#ok rant over because my phone screen is making me feel like I'm on a tilt a whirl or something
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A Lil Snootles Ranty Rant Time
Hoo boy I need to rant for a minute so everyone relax and just go with this, okay? Don't gotta read or say anything, I just need this out
I am at a really weird point in time right now.
I dropped out of college in September, I started working full time a couple months later, and I will be working full time until at least August. Which is when I plan on going back to school.
But like, I'm still working on figuring out everything I need for my future career. I'm working towards being an aquarist (basically a zookeeper but for an aquarium), and there's a lot of moving parts there in terms of what I need in order to even be considered/eligible for a job position.
I need to sign up for swim lessons this year, and I need to get my scuba certification. Neither are a requirement until I am ready to apply to different positions, but they'll only help me with school and internship opportunities. Which that's like a whole 'nother can of worms I am not prepared to deal with for the time being.
There's a woman at work who used to work with sea lions and she gave me some really good information and said I can contact her whenever. Which is great! I need to ask her what exactly she did, if she was an animal keeper with the sea lions or something else, what schooling she had before then (which I'm assuming and it was implied on she had a marine biology degree of some sort)
Anyways, what I've been avoiding saying is that I am just really overwhelmed with all this, I guess? Like I know it's gonna be a long process, which is better, but I still feel rushed, almost?
I just feel a certain amount of pressure to have all this shit figured out and like soon. I know I need to have an answer on going back to school by the summer so I can register for classes and stuff, and it'd be nice to have swim lessons already in the works before then.
I'm in my early twenties and I work full time. Honestly, I'm in a position that I really want my life to get a move on. I want to meet people and do fun stuff, I want to start dating, I want to put effort into my appearance this year. I don't know, I feel like physically I'm in a great spot for a relationship, and mentally I'm the best I've been for like 3 years now.
But I have to keep reminding myself that I'm only 21, I have time a plenty to figure this whole life thing out. I have time to figure out my career and finish schooling for it. I have time to find a partner. I have time to get stable enough financially to move out of the house.
I'm still just impatient, I guess?
It doesn't help that I still have like no social life. Especially since dropping out. I had a somewhat social life before when I was still in school, but I wasn't mentally in a good place so I rarely pursued being social.
But now I am in a good place. I've gotten past the point of needing my "weekend" to be a recovery period. I can do a bunch of shit over these two days and not feel exhausted, and can still start a new work week feeling pretty good.
I'm overwhelmed by all this but at the same time I'm not because I'm ready to get shit done. I'm ready to take the next step forward in life.
But I can't right now. It'll take so much time for all of this, and right now, I keep getting anxious about the future. I don't know, I'm struggling to put some of this into words.
I feel so silly being this distraught about life because I'm only 21 but I am.
#I don't know#a mutual said something a few days ago about wanting to be a girlfriend again#and I was just hit with the realization that I'm in a good spot mentally and physically#and that a relationship would be absolutely fucking top tier cause life is already pretty good right now#*mild slightly awkward scream cause ?????*#Snootles rants#Certified Snootles moment
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