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thefragileblackdahlia · 4 years

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Heaven: Part four

Chapter Summary:

Anna recalls her past and Sam and Dean understand why Castiel and Uriel want her dead. Anna recognizes Ariel from 'work' but doesn't remember her as the new and improved angel she is now. Ariel and Dean finally steal a moment for themselves

Character(s): Ariel, Dean, Sam, Ruby, Anna, Castiel, Uriel, Lucifer, Michael

Pairing(s): Eventual Dean x Ariel, Ruby x Sam, (former) Lucifer x Ariel

Warning(s): MAJOR Angst, Little bit of Crack, Angelcest??? Typical SUPERNATURAL Violence, Mild Language

A/N: I've been struggling to write this chapter since I have to write more than 3 characters than what I'm used to. Writing for Sam, Ariel and Dean is easy peasy but Ruby, Anna, Pamela, and the others are very difficult. I am publishing this chapter into two parts since I feel like that would be the easiest and because it's very long.

Also, I have no idea how Angel relationships work. They don't share the same DNA at all but only the same creator so under that, they are somewhat 'related' but not technically. Ariel and Lucifer have a strange, toxic, codependent relationship to begin with because of the bond- so I can expect them to be strange and touchy but with Michael and Ariel, she shuns it.

Please feel free to leave feedback.

Beta'd by Zoe (a friend)

Word count: 3,270+

Sam took a step forward, his eyes wide. He doesn't understand why he's fearful for Ariel's life when a regular hunting knife won't injure her.

The tall hunter outstretched his arms, slowly walking toward Anna. "She saved your life- she isn't with them!"

"You heard them, Anna...lower your blade." Ariel delivered those lines coldly, a dark part inside of her awakening.

At the given moment, Ariel wanted to snap her neck like a twig, and get to the next seal but she couldn't. It wasn't the humane thing to do and inside her head, she fought a constant battle between light and dark.

Anna pressed the rigid blade deeper, breaking Ariel's soft skin. She winced only slightly; Angels still felt pain.

The lesser angel turned her head toward Dean, "Like hell, angels like her don't save lives." Anna tried to get through to him but he just stood there, surprised by Ariel's calm demeanor. "She takes them. She came to take mine- she doesn't help at all!"

Ariel looked at Sam with dead eyes, "Get this lunatic off of me, before I seriously hurt her." A complacent smile to match her dead tone.

Sam finally looked Ariel in the eyes, "Wait- What do you mean she takes them?" But if that were the case why didn't anyone else react that way when they met Ariel? There was a small glint of uncertainty in his eyes, almost like he wanted to believe Anna.

Ariel scrutinized the two hunters, wondering what they were going to do. Were they going to let Ariel explain or kick her out? Inside she felt the suffocating darkness, devouring the good in her, and on the outside, she appeared calm.

Anna lowered the knife, "In Heaven- what do you think she did? Think she sat on a chair all day and watched you guys?" She gave her full attention to the hunters in an attempt to sway them to her side. "She was sort of like a dog. Michael says go fetch...she would fetch. Michael says-"

"Kill..." Pamela cut off Anna, stealing Ariel's attention.

Anna nodded her head, "She kills..." She looked at Ariel before continuing, "I used to report back to her... she was Head of my division. She watched humans for millions of years and then one day..."

Anna turned back to the Winchesters, "She smites an entire city- Children, women, innocent people that didn't deserve to die..."

The archangel's jaw tightened as Anna unraveled her ugly past. Her azure eyes met Dean's, his chartreuse eyes giving the angel a once over before shaking his head.

"People change." Dean murmured.

This earned him an incredulous look from Anna and a small smile from his archangel.

Ariel returned her attention back to the aggressive angel, "I saved your life... I have changed.

"Ariel is not innocent." Anna protested, walking over to Dean who just had a weird look in his eyes. He was ready to accept that she changed rather than lose her. Dean had done some horrible things too, did that mean that he couldn't change?

The worst part for Ariel was Dean, him trying so hard to be loyal, with every instinct telling him otherwise.

Sam shifted on his back foot, "And apparently... neither are you, Anna."

Pamela stood from her chair, "Ariel...why does that sound so familiar?" She turned her head in the boys' general direction. It took her only a moment to piece it together, "Why the hell is the angel that almost killed me- here hanging with you like she's family. I would think you'd kick her ass to the curb once she told you God had work for you."

"Don't talk about my Father like that..." Ariel tilted her head up toward the ceiling, inhaling deeply as she couldn't process what the hell she was feeling. Was this anxiety or panic? Maybe a little bit of both. She felt like she was on the chopping block although they couldn't kill her, she still felt like she might die.

"Why? It's not like he is actually there for you." Anna sneered.

Ariel pushed herself up off of the wall and glared at Anna with contempt in her voice, "He brought me back from the dead just so I can save your insufferable ass," She closed the gap between them, now in her face. "So that's a giant fuck you- to your face."

The archangel snatched the hunting blade from Anna's hand, spinning her around and forcing her against the wall with glowing gold eyes; There was a small hint of red in them. She held the blade against Anna's throat as her back was pressed flat against the iron wall. Ariel had no intention of hurting Anna. She just wanted to scare her into submission.

"Ariel!" Dean bellowed.

Ariel flipped her fiery red hair over her shoulder and let out a low huff, "You all have no idea what the hell it is like- to- to have a connection to Lucifer." She said his name with disgust. "Not just body and mind- but Grace. He's... inside of me. I can feel his...claws hooked deep," Her words fell off near the end.

The archangel subconsciously pressed the rigid blade deeper into Anna's neck, it pricking at her skin, drawing blood. "I was young- Dp you know what happens when you disagree with Lucifer? And you're always meant to be together because your Father likes to experiment?"

Ariel finally lowered the blade, turning to face Dean who had shared the same choleric expression as her. "So, don't paint me as this evil archangel-" She paused, peering over her shoulder at Anna and gripped the blade in her hands. Before she continued, she stabbed the blade right beside Anna's head, sticking it into the iron wall with great force.

"Because I am NOT Him," Ariel growled.

Soon after the outburst, Ariel's heels scuffed against the concrete as she walked past the Winchesters and used her grace to unlock the door. It swung open and she stepped through, furiously strutting over to the steps and leaving the basement.

Only a few seconds passed when the sound of a door slamming shut, echoed throughout the house and startling them all.

Dean flinched at the sound, his eyes still glued to the spot where she jammed the knife into the iron wall. His brain couldn't comprehend what the hell just happened before his eyes. The hunter gulped his jaw and shifted his gaze over to the wayward angel that just attacked his 'girlfriend.'

Everything escalated so quickly.

Anna's voice softened, "I'm sorry... But you can imagine why I was nervous-"

Dean cut her off, trying his best to conceal his frustration. He slightly shook his head in response to her half-assed apology, "Don't," He muttered. "She'll be fine...Just try not to attack her again with a knife."

Sam inhaled deeply and glanced at his brother who was just as unsure as him."Let's uh... go upstairs and see if there's anything in Bobby's books." He murmured as he motioned to the stairs,

Anna nodded at this, reluctantly going upstairs with a terrified Ruby.

Sam sighed, "What do we do?" He looked to Dean for help

The short-haired hunter ran his hand over his face. "Not sure." Dean's response was short, but he wore a stoic expression as he was deep in thought.

Today was going to be a long day.

Sam took a deep breath before giving a curt nod and starting for the door. Once he reached the devil's trap he glanced over his shoulder with a wary expression, "Do you believe her? I mean- about Ariel..."

This question earned a soft grunt from Dean, while his eyes were still fixed on the hunting knife. His brows snapped together as he heard a loud "Dean" from Pamela. The jaded hunter turned his body toward the blind psychic and held out his arm for her to latch onto.

"Sorry," Dean whispered.

Pamela held onto Dean for guidance as they left the panic room and headed toward the stairs. She furrowed her brows as Ariel's words echoed in her mind, 'He brought me back from the dead' If she was brought back from death a month later, would she still be the same?

Dean kept his eyes straight ahead as he traveled up the stairs with Pamela. A burning sensation filled his ears, almost like there was something that needed to be said but what? He decided he should now thank Pamela for her help before anything else transpired and he never gets the chance to.

"Thanks-" "Dean-" They spoke simultaneously.

A small smile crept onto Dean's lips at the scenario, "You first." He stated as he helped her up to the top step, watching her turn around to face him.

Pamela took a short breath before placing a light hand on his forearm, "There is darkness there... I felt it." Her comment prompted Dean to push her hand away and attempt to walk past her but she took a step in front of him.

"You have to consider... is Ariel really on your side?" She murmured.

Dean's eyes shot up to her black sunglasses, glowering at her with a clenched jaw. "Sam's waiting." He stepped around the psychic and walked into the library where he was met with Sam, Anna, and Ruby; Pamela close in tow.

BOBBY'S LIBRARY - DAY

For the time Dean and Pamela had been in the basement, Anna had been upstairs apologizing to Sam for freaking out.

Anna paced the room, her arms folded over her breasts as she pondered who might have come after her. "Don't be afraid... I'm not like Ariel or the others," She spoke with uncertainty heavy in her voice.

"I don't find that very reassuring..." Ruby argued with her arms crossed as she leaned against the doorway. She remained outside of the library and near the entrance because of the Devil's trap above their heads.

The cherry red-haired woman stopped in her tracks and glanced up at the Winchesters. "So...Castiel, Uriel-- they're the ones that came for me? Not the archangel?"

Dean's reply was abrasive, "No, she doesn't want to kill you. If her bashing in that prick's head isn't proof enough then I don't know what is." He perched himself against the desk, hoping Ariel didn't think he believed she was like Lucifer.

Sam inhaled sharply at the memory of the small redhead using all her strength to punch Uriel in the face. A faint smile tugged at the corner of his lips as he thought of her habit of not holding back, it was scary but also reassuring.

"So, you know them?" The giant asked, his eyes following the fallen angel.

Anna reluctantly nodded her head, "We were kinda in the same foxhole..." She fiddled with the zipper on her jacket as she stopped to think of what to say next. She sighed, "Before humans- before you all... I used to report to Ariel."

"So, if Ariel was your boss... What about Castiel and Uriel?" Dean queried, tapping his fingers on the wood.

Anna smiled faintly at the assumption that those two held rank over her. "Try the other way around...Though I'm sure after my fall, someone put Castiel in charge."

"But now they want to kill you?" Pamela's voice came from behind the angel, drawing attention from Anna to her. She stood leaning against the other side of the door frame but decided it was best to sit down.

Being the gentleman he was, Sam stepped forward to help Pamela into the nearest chair.

Anna let out a small sigh and began pacing the room again, "Orders are orders. I'm sure I have a death sentence on my head."

A small 'Why?' came from Pamela which prompted Anna to stop in her tracks and turn to the group, "I disobeyed..." She started. "Which, for us, is about the worst thing you can do... I fell."

"So like... Ariel?" Sam questioned.

Anna inhaled deeply, "No, that's different-"

"How is it different?" Dean cut Anna off.

"Anna fell to earth... became human." Ariel's sudden voice caused everyone to flinch and turn in her direction, she was walking into the kitchen with a bag of what they assumed to be food.

Food always dissolved tension. Right?

Anna tensed up at her sudden presence while all the others relaxed; There was an obvious shift in the atmosphere. The fallen angel slowly turned to face her former superior officer, her hazel eyes darting between Ariel's eyes and the food.

"You can relax. I'm going to murder you with Biggerson's." Ariel joked as she began taking the fast food out of the paper bags and placing it on the dining table.

Dean watched Ariel, searching her for any hint of sadness from earlier but she looked unbothered. At least on the outside. But Dean knew she was hurting inside.

Sam pursed his lips, "I'm not understanding, If you can become human- why can't she?" He pointed to the copper-haired archangel that stepped past the fallen lesser angel and over to where he was standing. It was odd to have her stand next to him and not next to Dean. Was she mad at Dean, or ashamed to be near him?

Ariel perched herself on the desk, leaning close to Sam, knowing he could relate to maybe how she was feeling with the darkness brewing inside her.

"It's different for archangels- ours refills over a long period of time... but regular angels- lesser angels, their grace doesn't. And removing your grace... it's painful," Ariel informed them.

Anna reluctantly nodded her head in agreement, "Try cutting your kidney out with a butter knife. That kind of hurt." She let out a heavy sigh. "I ripped out my grace."

The righteous man's brows snapped together at that statement, "Come again?"

The troubled archangel drew her lower lip between her lip and shifted onto her less dominant foot. "I told you....grace- it's pure energy. It's what let us use our magic," Ariel explained.

"Right... So, I hacked it out and fell. And my mother, Amy, couldn't get pregnant. Always called me her little miracle," Anna glanced over at Dean with a faint smile.

Ariel caught this.

"And the longer she stayed Human... she forgot she was an angel," Ariel added with a curt nod.

Dean raised a brow at Ariel's response. He had to be honest, he wasn't listening. When Ariel entered, his attention went to her wings that were draped around her and Sam. Maybe she didn't mean it or she just propped them up behind her- but it bothered Dean. And she didn't look at him once since she had returned and now he felt like maybe there was something wrong between them. He was pulled out of his thoughts when Ruby broke the silence.

"We're screwed," Ruby huffed. She pushed herself up from the frame and shook her head, "Ariel has little to no grace, Anna has NO grace- I don't think you all appreciate how completely screwed we are."

"Ruby's right." Anna paced the room once again before stopping and recommencing, "Heaven wants me dead- and if Ariel has no grace- She can't fight off angels and demons. Maybe one side- but even then..." The fallen angel let out a frustrated sigh and looked to Ariel for guidance, it was a force of habit.

Ariel's eyes were fixed on the carpet as she thought over how the scenario would go, "The only solution would be, to find your grace." She pushed herself up from the desk and walked around the side. "Ruby is basically human besides a few magic tricks and strength,"

The archangel unfolded the map of the USA and stretched it out over the desk as she resumed speaking, "Anna is human and I can't even smite a fly... So we need her to get her grace back, whether it be for her- that is... if she chooses to stay human."

"So, what, one of you just takes some divine bong hit, and, shazam, and you become Roma Downey?" Dean pointed between the two redheads and each of them nodded but one responded verbally.

"Something like that," Anna replied.

Dean straightened and turned around to face his angel that still hadn't made eye contact with him. He opted to ignore her silent treatment and clasped his hands together, "Alright, Red, I like your plan. So where's this grace of hers?"

Ariel shook her head and kept her eyes locked on the map, "Hard to say," She lied. "After I had the job change, I never paid Anna any mind. She fell sometime around the 20th century...because then- I remember speaking with Castiel. He was... heartbroken to say the least."

Sam smiled faintly at her response, "How old are you?" He knew she danced around the topic of age, he wasn't sure why. It wasn't as if they would be repulsed by the fact she is billions of years old. If anything Sam would probably ask a ton of questions.

A quaint smile danced across her lips, "Like I've told you before, I've been alive since creation- not before..." Ariel gazed at Sam with sweet eyes, "But you already knew that- You're just calling me old." She laughed, keeping her eyes on Sam until her smile faltered when she remembered how serious things were at the moment.

"Anyways," She cleared her throat and focused on the map. "We should be able to figure it out depending on where she fell...so?"

Dean watched this exchange with jealous eyes. He remembered that day... Ariel went off with Sam for two days and they came back acting weird as if something happened between them. Sam would always say 'Ask Ariel' and she would just say 'Ask Sam.'

It was an annoying paradox that would have never ended if he hadn't stopped prying.

Glowering at his brother and not even bothering to listen to the plan, Dean was startled when Sam said his name.

"Dean..."

"What?" Dean snapped.

"I asked if you can take Pamela home while Ariel and I figure out where her grace landed," Sam huffed at his brother's obliviousness wondering what the hell had Dean so caught up in his head. Little did he know, it was him.

"Yeah, sure..." Dean toned down his envy and dug through his jean pockets for the impala keys. Once he found them he pivoted on his heel and held out a hand for Pam to take.

Ariel kept her eyes on the map as she sifted through her deepest memories, trying to remember where her grace landed. She was on earth at the time, right? Yes. The guardian's brows snapped together as she could distinctly remember the screaming. God, the screaming.

How could she have done these terrible things?

Was that what God wanted?

'Did you change your mind?' An incorporeal voice reverberated through Ariel's skull causing her to flinch.

Ruby eyed her, "You alright?" She questioned Ariel who seemed a bit skittish.

Ariel parted her lips, taking in a short breath. She went too deep into her memories and came across horrors and regrets.

It all overwhelmed her.

"No," She murmured.

"What's wrong?" Sam straightened as he gazed at the agonized angel. He could tell it had something to do with Lucifer from how she flinched. He now wondered if Lucifer was speaking to her from the cage.

That couldn't be possible, right? Maybe it was just a flashback.

Anna stared at her former boss with furrowed brows."Maybe just go outside- get some fresh air," She murmured.

FINAL PART

SERIES MASTERLIST

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nekogal89 · 5 years

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I had more thoughts on the epilogue, specifically the candy route.

So...I have seen a lot of people theorising that this entire thing has been a parody of fanfiction. And to some extent, yeah. But I had a different idea on why everything is the way it is.

It starts with Dirk’s death.

The reson Dirk kills himself as given, is due to not seeing a place for himself in this new universe. There’s going to be no challenge, nothing to push himself for, no satisfaction. Everything is going to come easy. Which ends up kind of the Candy Route in a nutshell, and it’s not until those issues start to come up that people can really start getting to a healthy point.

EVERYTHING comes too easy. Whatever the characters want, they get. And when you have multiple characters with different interests and wants, then that causes problems. Jane wants to help run everything, and despite not really becoming president, she gets all the power she wants, she gets to enact all the whims that come to her. She wants Jake? She gets Jake, and all his agency in the situation is taken away from him. And Jake doesn’t get what he wants, actual freedom from everyone manipulating him, until she’s done with her fun.

Jade wants to sleep with Dave and Karkat, and she gets it. They just fall in line with what she wants, no matter how much they resent it. Sure, there’s some token not really resistance at the start, but they ultimately have to abide by the candy universes laws of “You always get what you want.” It’s not until Karkat, in a final fit of everyone elses will getting enforced on him, pushes for what HE wants, that Jade’s bad actions kind of not really get back. John wants Roxy. He gets Roxy. A lot of people talk about how they hate how Roxy became OOC in the candy route, and I hated it to. I still do. But ultimately, what choice did he have? Roxy has a bad history of both impulse and trying to make the people he loves happy, and impulsively going with what you want is a death trap in a universe designed to give it to you. He wants to get married, he literally gets married off screen. He wants a baby, look, there’s his baby. It’s not until John’s depression stops exerting him exerting his will that Roxy gets to be himself again. Even then, things like his gender dysphoria, his feelings about the gender binary and how they affect him get an easy, not satisfying conclusion, because thats what the candy universe gives people. The only pair that gets anything really remotely “Happy” is Rose and Kanaya. And even Rose’s happiness seems to be based on not having to feel the need to push for and against absolutely everything anymore. She has enough conflict to keep her natural need for strife in check with the war, but she thinks about wanting to adopt a grub, she and Kanaya adopt a grub. A grub who grows up to be the exact kind of difficult, rebellious teenager she would be proud to call her daughter. In a way, even we, the fandom, get it, and this why why I’m saying that, yeah, the whole “Parody of fandom fluff” thing is still pretty valid with what I’m theorising. People wanted to know what happens with Vriska? We got her. We get her out of goddamn no where, and she is angry. We wanted characters like Gamzee to get a redemption ark? He got it, and we have to deal with what happens when someone who’s entire scthick is corruption gets to have actual power over people through his “Redemption” cult. It all came easy, and thus there’s no satisfaction to it. So...What does this mean for the meat timeline? If the Candy timeline is everything coming too easy, then that means the Meat timeline is everything being far too hard? Well...yeah. People still make similar mistakes based on their conflicting desires. But they don’t just ‘get’ them. Jane tries to have Jake, with or without his real consent [urgh], but it doesn’t work, because it’s not as easy as plying him with alcohol and oh what is that a juju why mister english if you insist. Jade doesn’t just get Karkat and Dave, because instead of being two, in Candy timeline’s words, “Loser virgins in their basement” [again, urgh], Dave finds a cause to really rally behind. Karkat doesn’t get to become an awesome leader, because it’s too hard for him. And ultimately, a universe where things are given to you for little to nothing does fit Karkat a lot easier than a universe where you have to fight tooth and nail for literally everything. [I love Karkat, but his failure knight tendancies and being brought down by his own self loahting, almost define him at this point]. And Roxy. Without having to just please people, and without his impulses just getting rewarded, he gets to actually take a look at himself and work out who he is. It is as difficult as the narrative has space to show, and even unknowingly he gets treated like shit by the guy who, 1) is supposed to be his best friend, and 2) if it wasn’t for everything it was going the way it was would probably understand better than anyone. But he gets it, and it’s so much more satisfying than the easy solution the candy timeline gave. Which brings us back full circle to the man who started it all. Dirk Strider. The man who thrives most in situations where nothing is just given. We have the whole metanarrative of all the different splinters of Dirk coming together, meaning he gains Bro’s manipulations, Doc Scratches fourth wall awareness, and even Lord English’s utter contempt for anyone he considers beneath himself. But he is still in an enviroment where he has to fight against everyone and everything to achieve his goal, and it is perfect for him. Does this make his actions okay? No. No it does not. Does this make it any better for the people who associate with Dirk like I associate with Vriska? Definitely not. In fact, as far as everything goes, maybe it makes it worse. But when I see everything in the context of no challenge versus as much challenge as possible...it makes things better. Or maybe I’m a dumb bitch trying to find meaning in the webcomic I’ve spent a decade of my life on having a painful as all hell ending.

#Homestuck #Homestuck Epilogues #Spoilers

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tommykaine · 6 years

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Till Death Do Us Part ramblings

Now that I’ve been tinkering with the game for a bit (two days I have no shame) I feel that I can ramble a bit about it

Warnings for assorted spoilers under the cut and also mentions of things of distasteful nature due to the game in question

First things first I’m gonna get this out of the way because I know it’s just unescapable: whether this is “another BTD”, and just the general comparison that is bound to happen between the two BTD games and TDDUP.

My answer to that is no, it’s very much not “BTD 3 but with a different name”.

Yes, the “genre” is of the same nature, and the way the game functions is similar (but it’s a visual novel pretty much, all visual novels have multiple choices and different story outcomes at the end depending on previous choices). However, there are significant differences, enough to make me come to the conclusion that this is only superficially related to the first games.

Firstly, TDDUP is a lot more story-driven. You still have several choices, but there is a lot more reading involved than in the BTD games. Besides the amount of text, however, the main difference is with the MC:

In BTD, the MC was more or less a blank state. Yes, there was a hint of pre existing characterization (in BTD 1 we know they are a drinker and have trouble socializing) and some that would come up depending on the choices (in one route it comes up that the BTD 2 MC likes to paint, for example), but for the most part, you could imagine whatever backstory and it would fit.

In TDDUP, you still have room for your own headcanons and some degree of customization (name and gender - note that the gender option influences more than just pronouns/titles. If you want to headcanon the MC as a pre-op trans character you might want to pick the “they” option), but there is a whole pre-existing set-up that is different in each story.

So basically in BTD it was more like the MC was a self-insert/your own OC in a story, whereas in TDDUP it’s more like you are playing a pre-existing character.

Same with the relationships - in BTD, you’re just getting to know the guys, and even with the more “romantic” outcomes there is no pre-set relationship. In TDDUP, each pairing has a more specific setting. Either you’ve recently escaped a relationship with an obsessive partner who just can’t let you go, or you’re the main asshole in what ends up being a mutually destructive relationship, or you’re in a loving marriage that is suddenly shattered by a dangerous secret. The same is true in the scenarios with Aria and Ellen, albeit a bit less so in Ellen case as she knows about you but you barely do.

Another major difference is that in BTD, your “goal” was to survive (even if that was not the real goal for most of the players let’s be real ;) ). Most of the endings involved the MC being killed for failing, with a few harder to get ones where you get to survive (albeit how “good” of an ending you’d get was quite arguable). In TDDUP however, there isn’t really a “goal” towards getting any specific ending. In one of the routes it’s not possible to be killed in the first place so all endings are survival endings, in another there are a few death endings but they’re not necessarily the most likely endings you’re gonna get. So the “goal” is not really to survive, but to advance the story (or for a “final goal”, to unlock all the endings and get the bonus content, if you’re a completionist).

Finally, there is as far as I can tell no connection between the BTD characters and the TDDUP characters. Whereas in BTD 2, you had some characters being connected to and/or mentioning BTD 1 characters, so there was an explicit connection between the stories. In fact, TDDUP might not even take place in the same universe as the BTD games, as evidenced by the fact that there are no supernatural elements in it (even Strade, who was the closest to a “regular human” you’d get in the BTD universe aside from the MCs, had a supernatural creature as a pet).

There are some other differences (the obvious one being that this is @electricpuke’s fully own creation of course) but I think that these are the main ones that bring me to consider TDDUP as a completely different creation than the two BTD titles, rather than a spin off or a sequel in all but name.

Now that that’s out of the way, I’m gonna talk about some of my first impressions. Please note that this is all very subjective and mostly based on personal taste!

I’m also using pronouns based on which ones I picked in each route, as those are kind of my own “headcanon” for the situations, so it’s not gonna be gender neutral in all of them for that reason.

Also, this is where the most spoilery part starts, so be warned for that!

My first reaction was that I really loved the first endings I got for both Chris and Jack. They are also my two favourites out of the four characters, followed by Aria and Marcus. I don’t know why, but I just couldn’t get into Ellen (no pun intended). Her storyline just didn’t click with me for some reason.

I think my absolute favourite storyline and pair out of the three might be the one with Jack (unfortunately he hates the memes - btw the first time I arrived at the “stab me daddy” option I was unable to continue for like 5 mins cause I was just stuck there laughing at it). I’m a sucker for fictional serial killers, and as unrealistic as that’d be IRL I love the “one exception” type of dynamic with a serial killer and another character. I really liked how Jack was genuinely in love with the MC, the fact that it wasn’t just an act for him to act like the caring husband. In my first playthrough with him my character was trying to reach out to his caring side, to still accept him to some degree, but in the end Jack couldn’t kill him nor keep him - therefore, the only thing he could do was leave. It was really sad, but I liked that ending the most. I was expecting to prefer the one where MC snaps and comes to love the twisted side of Jack (for example the survival ending in BTD 1 where MC snaps and joins Sano as a fellow killer is still my favorite one out of all the endings in that game) but I actually didn’t. I didn’t dislike it, but I didn’t love it either.

I just really like that the ending where he leaves was the closest Jack could get to a genuine love for his partner, as he realizes he cannot have him like he’d want to, and that MC will never see him in the same way he did before, but he doesn’t want to kill him to save himself from the consequences, so the only thing he can do is leave.

The first ending I got with Chris (by the way I hadn’t understood from the warnings that the temperament referred to how MC acted, so I went in thinking “I kind of want my character to be a dick to him” and it turned out that was exactly the case, lol) was the one where he gets his revenge, then he just leaves. It felt like the best culmination of their dynamic, honestly. It just was doomed to not end well, and in the end it doesn’t - not because Chris kills MC or tells him off and says they both need help, but he just has had enough, and that’s it. There’s no closure, no lesson to learn, no attempt to salvage what’s left. MC destroyed what they had built together and was left with nothing, and no one to blame for that but himself - if he even could have the self-awareness to do that.

I also really like the ending where he decides to leave but explains you why, and you repent for your actions but too late, which is probably the closest thing to an actual good ending you can get in the entire game with any character. Arguably the one where you stay together and agree to work on your issues is the “actual good ending” but I’m honestly too jaded to believe it. In my opinion it’s just not going to work out, either MC is going to slip back into his old habits and Chris will either tolerate it or break it off, or if things go a bit better then they’re just gonna end up breaking up because they each bring out the worst in the other. It’s also why it’s not one of my favourites, even if I do like it. My third favourite is the one where Chris turns himself in, which is also the saddest in my opinion. MC doesn’t have the self awareness nor the care to realize their wrong-doings in years (unless someone else forces them to), yet Chris cannot cope with what he has done in maybe a couple days, he’d rather face the consequences of that and be done with it. You could argue there is a big disproportion between what Chris and MC did, but also consider that especially in Aria’s route it comes up that MC sexually assaults Chris, and we do not know whether MC has ever been physically abusive as well, plus MC has been abusing Chris for years whereas Chris snaps after years of mistreatment from pretty much everyone (not saying he’s right to be violent, in an IRL situation no one would be innocent, but in the contest of the story it’s hard to argue that Chris is the one to blame).

I don’t love any of Aria’s endings to the same extent, but I do like her route nonetheless. I think my favourite ending is the one where you are trapped in her basement until you die and she wants both herself and Chris to forget about you. It’s just so tragic and twisted, plus it low-key references Poe so that’s a plus (I loved the Poe reference in BTD 2 too - sorry for comparing the games again but I’m just a sucker for this kind of thing, plus The Pit and The Pendulum is my favorite of Poe’s tales). I like how her confrontation of the MC comes both from a loving place but also from a selfish one - that’s why you don’t get any “good” endings in her route, not even a sad one. She never actually wants MC to do things right, she just wants her gone so that she can no longer hurt her brother, and she wants her to pay for what she has done.

I kind of would have liked to have a survival ending in which she keeps MC for herself but I definitely understand why that’s not an option. Probably wouldn’t have suited the storyline if there was.

Still, if there is ever a TDDUP 2 or another game involving murder husbandos/waifus, I’d love it if we got a femdom route with that option, JS ;P

I liked Marcus’s route, but just not as much as the other ones. It’s the first one I tried, so if I didn’t like it at all I might not have been so inclined to play the others, but I think it just was overshadowed by how much I liked Jack’s and Chris’s routes. So it’s not like I can find any specific fault to it, I just loved the other ones too much, lol. I definitely liked John’s character too (he’s the one true Cinnamon Roll) and his relationship to the MC. Which works very well to make all of the outcomes for MC all the more tragic.

I like that there are ONLY survival endings to his route. MC doesn’t get to escape their fate, not even by dying. They *are* going to stay with Marcus whether they like it or not. The closest they can get to a “good” ending is by getting mindbroken and accepting the situation, which is arguably the “worst” ending you can possibly get as in all of the other ones MC does at least retain their determination.

As I’ve mentione before, I’m not a great fan of Hellen. I think the ending I liked the most is the one where she lets MC go because she is now obsessed with both Jack and his wife. I don’t foresee a good future for MC there XDOverall, I just wasn’t as invested. I wonder if maybe if I had played her route before Jack I would have liked it more, as by that point I was so enamoured by the Jack/MC dynamic, and maybe I just saw her as getting in the way of that? No idea. I ended up using guides to get most of her endings to see if my opinion of her changed, but it didn��t make much of a difference, aside from the aforementioned survival ending.

That’s just me though, I’ve seen other posts from people who really liked her! I’m glad she’s there for those who do, I’m just not going to be one of her fans XD sorry.

Overall, I really liked the game, might play around with it more (especially if I draw or write something with the characters), it definitely was an experience that I’d like to repeat and a great early Christmas surprise as I only found out about it the other day XD

I’ll definitely be looking forward to other games from EP, whether to continue from where this left off, or to see something new entirely.

#TDDUP spoilers #TDDUP game #not really a review as much as my assorted ramblings on the subject #i just was so hyped up about it and had to let it out lol

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