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#I’ll add em and switch out the image later

plumvy · 3 years

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TS2 Tattoo Tutorial!

I thought I’d make a tutorial on creating a tattooed skin! I believe you can use any editing program for this since it’s fairly simple. I’ve never done a tutorial so please bear with me! It’s text & picture heavy so under the cut it all goes! I learned the basics years ago from this video and another one my friend had made but has since been deleted. I had to learn about tricky placement of tattoos on my own and hopefully I’ll be able to show a teeny bit more of that as well soon if you’d like! I know my writing is not the best and it can come off confusing, if there’s something that‘s difficult to get please send me an ask or message!

Step One: Open body-shop and create a new project. Select the skin you'll be using. Pick a name that will make it easy to find. I named mine "Tutorial-Tattoo".

Step Two: Open your editing program (I’m using Photoshop), find your projects folder within the EA folder, and open the folder of your skin.

Step Three/Guide: You'll find all the skin's textures in that folder. It might be a little confusing but it isn't once you know the names! In the case you're new to body-shop, I'll break down what these files are (if I'm mistaken or anyone has a link to a better explanation, please lmk).

Teen through elder have three body textures, "cut" is when your sim is fit, "normal" is their default body, and "soft" is when your sim is fat. (I'll show how to give the different body-types the same tattoo later on!) For adding a tattoo we won't be focusing on the face or hair textures. (You can create face tattoo's though, maybe I'll get to that in the future!)

I've boxed out the groups, the red is adult female (AF), the blue is adult male (AM), the gray is infant (BFM), the black is child (CFM), the yellow is elder female (EF), the pink is elder male (EM), the orange is toddler (PFM), the purple is teen female (TF), and the green is teen male (TM).

Now you can pick whichever you'd like! I'll be using the adult male skin, so open it up in your editor.

Step Four: Place the image you'd like as your tattoo onto your opened skin texture. Find the blending mode option and change it to multiply instead of normal. This will remove your white background.

Tip: The easiest images to use have white or transparent backgrounds. If there's texture (like it's straight from paper) you can edit the image to erase some of it or make the background brighter, then the multiply option will remove most/all of the background for you.

Step Five: Now you can mess around with the tattoo image and find a place you'd like it. Have fun with it, resize it, warp it, etc. do whatever suits your fancy!

Placement can be tricky and you may need to try multiple times until you're happy with it. If you want a tattoo to wrap around their arm or leg it will take a little bit more effort. For this tutorial I placed the tattoo over both sides of his right arm and this will make it wrap around it! If you want more tips on how to do tricky placements like this let me know! You can message me or I could try to make another tutorial. I’m not super great at them but I can do my best to help!

Now you can save it in order to see it in body-shop. This part is crucial, you need to save as a bmp file, or it will not work. It should ask if you'd like to replace the current file so click yes (all this is doing is overwriting the blank texture it was before). Go back to body-shop and refresh, your new skin should show up! If you aren't happy with how it looks, you can go back to your editor and mess around with it until you are! Once you're satisfied move on to the next step, or step seven.

Step Six (Optional): If you want your tattoo to be on another age, gender, or body type this is what you'll do. I chose to add it onto the elder male, so you'll open a new file and choose that texture. Switch back to your adult male texture, right click the tattoo and copy that layer. You'll then want to right click the copied image and duplicate it to send to your elder male texture. It may need a slight tweak depending on the placement if the body is smaller/bigger, but nothing major! This way it will appear in the same exact place for the different ages, genders, and body types and you'll only have to save it instead of start from scratch.

Step Seven: If your skin is ready to go then you can give it a custom swatch. Open a new file and choose the swatch texture. Flatten your tattoo with the skin layer, select a portion you'd like to see as the thumbnail, and make a copy of it. Duplicate that copied selection and send it to your swatch texture. You can move it around until it fills up the space, save it as a bmp and done! Refresh your body-shop once more and your custom thumbnail should appear. You can give your skin a name and import it into your game. All done!

I hope this was helpful and not the most confusing thing on Earth! Thank you for reading!

#ts2 tutorial #ts2 tattoo #ts2 tattoo tutorial #ts2 skin #the sims 2 #ts2 #simblr #sims 2 tutorial #the sims 2 tutorial

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ommsims · 3 years

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story process challenge

i was tagged by @xldkx to do this challenge, created by @herpixels , like a month? a month and a half? ago and it’s been sitting half finished in my drafts for nearly as long. *sigh* (regardless, i love stuff like this so even if it takes me forever to get to it, i appreciate the tags! 💕).

i decided to answer all the qs because it took me damn long enough to get to this, so i might as well put some extra elbow grease into it (plus it was fun!). btw it’s all going under a cut b/c it is long. i apologize in advance.

1. My Writing Process - used to be a hot damn mess. literally word docs strewn throughout my pc. However, I recently switched to using Onenote (it’s what i use to organize my d&d campaign notes) and hoo-boy is it so much nicer. this is how it’s set up and it’s honestly night and day. i can have a page with outlines, a page to organize & order screenshots, and a separate page for drafting text, and i can easily toggle though them without having to switch windows? a big thumbs up from me.

When it comes to actual writing- I used to write my drafts in novel format, which i enjoyed but it made “converting” them into tumblr posts time consuming and frustrating. I ended up scrapping most of the text in the process, retaining pretty much only the dialogue.

Anyway, nowadays I write in more of a screenplay format: dialogue only + key scene information with the occasional note to self.

I do keep a master “arcs” page with key events and each individual character’s arc from beginning to end and secondary “outline” pages with slightly more detailed outline for each leg of the project. No screencaps b/c spoilers galore!

My typical work flow process for a scene goes: (1) brainstorm scene ideas, (2) take screenshots, (3) organize screenshots into a rough storyboard, (4) add 1st draft of text, (5) edit photos, (6) edit text, (7) upload to "drafts” here on tumblr, (8) let sit for a bit (9) take a final look at things/proofread and edit as needed. It may sound counterintuitive, but i find it much easier to write dialogue for a set of images rather than attempt to take images based on prewritten text. I feel more comfortable editing and tweaking tone and content in the text this way. Otherwise, I get frustrated when I “can’t” shoot a scene exactly as it appeared in my head.

2. How I build my scenes - A lot of what i do is rooted in gameplay, therefore my sets are usually (a) play-tested and (b) not super pretty. I’ve certainly improved at decorating & building over the years but more often than not I download lots off tumblr and the gallery because I don’t have the patience, aptitude, or time to build all of my own sets. That being said, I frequently gut builds only to build a number of completely unrelated mini sets inside to reduce the number of times i have to replace lots. I also keep a list of “important locations” and where certain characters live / will move to, to help keep this all straight as there aren’t nearly enough lots per neighborhood or even per world in this damn game...

my least favorite part of scene building is actually decorating. lol. Don’t get me wrong, I love clutter. I honestly do. but fuck me if i expect myself to spend hours meticulously decorating a set, spend another 3 hours toggling back and forth b/w BB & live modes adjusting things to get rid of the damn routing errors. (yeah, yeah, i know i could ignore them, they’re not important, especially in those scenarios where i’m using a set for screenshots and nothing else, but idk. it really grinds my gears.) and then have to replace the lot like a week later because there aren’t enough lots in the game. *sigh*

3. CC/Pose Making - i do not consider myself to be a cc creator nor a pose maker but i do dabble occasionally. And to be completely honest i’d much rather spend my time doing other stuff, so it’s not high on my list of priorities atm. plus there are so many talented cc creators in this community; i can usually get by with what’s already out there.

4. Getting in the zone - Honestly, I do a lot of brainstorming for plot & dialogue in the shower. I don’t have any particular playlists to get me “in the writing mood” but I do enjoy listening to music as I work. Either instrumental stuff or simply artists/songs I like. If something just so happens to “fit” a scene I’m working on, one i’ve got planned, or even just gives me vibes for a certain character or group, I add a quick note to the top of said scene’s draft. Most of the time I stick it in the recesses of my brain and add a quick link when I finally get to the point of posting the draft to tumblr. For whatever reason, when I have one of those “oh this song is perfect for X” moments it’s essentially ingrained in my mind for the rest of eternity.

5. The screenshot folder - this will most likely give some of you out there major anxiety. but i swear it’s an organized chaos. :)

yep. 32.9gb of screenshots & related things...

So with the raws from a single random scene selected, you can see i take roughly 10 screenshots per image posted. not terrible i guess but i’m working on it. Typically I take screenshots and once I’m done editing a scene I’ll move them from the general folder to a more specific project folder.

6. Captions - I’ll answer this in three parts:

for my townie story. not really. I prefer using the text box. I tend to write (& re-write) the dialogue for each one of these scenes several times over as I add more “scenes” into my drafts. It would be incredibly inefficient, time consuming, and would waste a lot more space on my pc to have to save .psds of each image just so i could edit dialogue when I decide: “oh hey maybe so and so needs to bring up X in this scene” and then change my mind an hour later.

for niko, noor, & co. I’m a text on image type gal here. don’t really know why, but it gives the project a different energy. ironically it makes it feel more laid-back to me. which i guess makes sense, it’s a much more light-hearted “story” than my townie project. which is, imo, very soapy haha.

for legacy stuff. all text goes below the images in the text box. reasoning: it’s gameplay, I don’t brainstorm, outline, or pre-write for this. I play the game, take screenshots, plug ‘em into my drafts and write some commentary / dialogue to go along with it.

7. Editing - i am a creature of habit and have not majorly changed my editing process in probably a year and a half (when I began using reshade and had to adjust my color correcting psd). it’s a super basic system:

drag & drop my “color correction” psd.

run actions in ps. (i made my own “all-in-one” actions to really streamline the process; i have different “actions sets” for my premades’ story and for other things that get posted to tumblr. even if no one else notices it, i like the little details that keep my projects separate and “identifiable”.

voila. all set to upload.

sometimes i crop images, add “text effects”, or do more in depth editing (i.e. editing a phone screen or adding rain etc.) but overall i try and keep it simple for myself.

8. Throwback - i posted an image of one of the first (but never posted) scenes I’d written for my townie project up above. but as for how would i redo a scene i’d already posted. well i’m currently re-doing my townie story so i guess i’ll just say you’ll see how it’s redone when i get to part 1! 😉

anyway, no tags because i’m so embarrassingly late to this party but if you hadn’t gotten around to this tag, wanted to do it but didn’t get a tag, or started it and left it to sit and now you’re thinking “oh god that was months ago should i even post this anymore?!?” consider yourself tagged by me and go ahead and post it for all to see!

#tag train #story process challenge #it's long. it's rambly. but that's me.#this one was a challenge! a challenge but fun.

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funsize-lucifer-hongjoong · 4 years

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We Are Stars For Each Other

Chapter 6 - Space Oddities and Hangovers

Genre - Fluff, Yandere Hongjoong (If you squint), Flirtin’

Word Count - 2,492

Hongjoong X You (Implied female reader)

The next morning your eyes open to piercing light shining through the windows, blinding your eyes and causing your head to throb. Your bleary gaze takes in the fact that you're in the living room, sprawled across the couch. A lone empty soju bottle lays on the floor near your feet. The full bottle still on the table makes you nauseous just by looking at it.

"Oh, Oh my God." You feel the urge to wretch as you sit up. "I haven't had a hangover this bad since College." Your hands press at your temples, trying to quell the pain that shoots through your forehead.

You grab up the full bottle of soju, walking over to put it in the refrigerator. The bottle of water in the door piques your interest. The coolness helps, but the liquid hits your stomach and you run for the bathroom.

Violent vomiting wasn't a thing on your to-do list today. Neither was drinking away your pain last night or the fact that Wooyoung and Hongjoong had both been in your apartment. That memory made you jolt your head up from the porcelain.

"They were both here. Both of them. In my apartment. Last night." You set your head against the bathtub behind you with a thump, causing another throb of pain.

"Y/N, you're a drunken idiot." The words come out to the empty walls around you. They slightly echo back your defeat. The deal you made, and the hurt that still lingered.

"Minie is gonna be home tonight. Let's just make it till then. She can help me sort this out." Your eyes watered, you weren't sure if it was because of the pain in your head or your heart.

You stand on shaky legs, pulling open the cabinet and grabbing the nearest bottle of pain killers. "Sweet mother of God, please let this help." Two pills in your hand you walk back out to the living room, grabbing the offending bottled water and chasing the pills with it.

You lay down on the couch again, the sour smell of alcohol fills your nose and makes your stomach turn. There's something else though, smelling like fresh rain in the forest, light and cool. When you crack your eyes open you see what looks like a black jacket laying across the back of the cushions.

"What the hell, now I KNOW those guys didn't come in here and take any clothes off.", grabbing it and holding it up. It's a black denim jacket covered in splotches of orange paint. ATEEZ is plastered across the back, and it looks to be hand-painted. You run your fingers across the letters and crack the slightest smile. When you flip it to the front, the smell comes back, stronger now. It reminds you of the warm sunshine after a storm. Hongjoong is painted in white above the front right pocket.

"God damn if this is what he always smells like I might lean toward Team Hongjoong on this one." You bring the jacket to your face, inhaling its comforting scent. "I love a man that smells good.", whispering softly as you lay back, cradling it to your chest as you fall asleep.

"Well, what do we have here?!" Min Seo nearly shouts from the front door.

"Minie, please. I've got the worst headache and I feel like shit. Take it easy on me, ok?" Your words come out slurred from sleep.

Min Seo gets down on her knees in front of you. You realize now you can't hide the tears from her. They slide down your cheeks as you lay on your side in a pitiful fetal position.

"Oh no, what happened? Did the boys pick on you again?" She stands, hands on her hips, "Where's your damn phone?! I'll give tell them exactly what kind of assholes they're being right now!"

You smirk, clutching the denim in your hands. "Minie, language. Do you kiss your mother with that mouth?"

"I most certainly do, and I'm about to tell those boys what they can kiss too." She replies, her chest puffed out.

You reach up and grab her hand, pulling her back down. "Minie, chill out. Let me explain."

Over the next hour and a half, you explain everything. The Hi touch that went oh so wrong, but kinda right. Hongjoong texting you while he pretended to be Wooyoung. When you got to that part, the tears started. The drunken dialing, and the fact that Hongjoong and Wooyoung came to check on you.

She put her hand up to stop you, grabbing a tissue from the box on the coffee table wiping your cheeks with it before handing it to you. Her hand moves softly on your shoulder, it was almost like all the tears you had held in escaped all at once. Finally, you weren't alone, and you had someone to vent to.

"M-Minie..." You sobbed, wiping your nose. "Minie, what am I gonna do. They made a deal with me. Hongjoong and Wooyoung, the first one to win me over gets the right to be with me." You sniffle.

Holding the jacket up to her as proof. "See? Hongjoong left his jacket here too. Now I've got to see them both at this stupid backstage thing and I don't know what to do." You throw the jacket on the floor, "What the hell do both of them expect from me, Minie?!" You put your face in your hands, leaning against Min Seo for comfort and maybe some wise words for once.

Her arm wraps protectively around your shoulders, giving a light squeeze. "Well, Y/N we do what we always do when men are assholes." You look over at her to see a devilish smirk on her face as she adds, "We play dirty."

Your response is a tight nod of your head, as you grab the jacket back up and hug it to your face, the scent of rain and trees envelope you. Min Seo raises an eyebrow as she watches you, "It seems to me Y/N that you've got it bad for Hongjoong" You can hear her giggling as you launch a pillow at the side of her head, "That's not funny Minie! You know I want Wooyoung, not Hongjoong."

As you think about those words as they leave your mouth you realize they may not be the whole truth of the matter. Flashes of eyes the color of coal come to mind, with a sharp jaw and soft full lips.

You try to shake the images from your head and look up to your best friend with a sigh and a soft smile. "Let's do the damn thing, Minie." You stand, "But first, did you bring me any snackies home?" You pout at her, as she smiles to answer back, "You know I did."

One gifted hoard of junk food and 2 episodes of a drama later, your heart feels lighter, more at ease. When your phone begins to vibrate, you try to grab it before it starts to play your ringtone, but it ended with you falling off the couch in a heap and Min Seo laughing so hard soda came out her nose.

You ringtone blares through the house at full volume. "Y/n, really?" She looks over at your struggle, "Your ringtone is Hongjoong's cover of Space oddity?!" She snorts, "I thought you HATED HIM."

You snatch up your phone, sitting on the floor like you meant to fall all along. You were already caught. "Min Seo!" You scolded, "I just like David Bowie, OK?! It has NOTHING TO DO WITH Kim H-" You stop, your eyes staring at the screen in your hands. The word Lucifer is lit up, and you look over to Min Seo, fear in your eyes.

"Holy fuck Minie, it's Hongjoong!" fumbling, you nearly dropping your phone, "Do I answer it?" Your hands tremble, right thumb poised over the green icon.

"Answer it, pabo!" Minie nearly screams, "and ask if San wants to talk to me." You barely hear that last part, almost as if you weren't meant to.

You take a deep breath and your anxiety goes through the roof as you hit the button on the screen. All the while mouthing the words, "Please hang up, Please hang up..."

"Y/N?" The voice on the other end is smooth but sounds tired. The raspy voice of Kim Hongjoong.

"Yes, Joongie?" The use of his pet name has Min Seo laughing even harder, surely Hongjoong can hear her.

"I just wanted to call and check on you." He quips, picking up on the slight quiver in his voice, he's nervous. "Wanted to make sure you didn't die or anything."

"Well, I woke up with a hangover this morning. Other than that, I'm alright now." Your reply comes out a little sharper than you meant it to.

"Has Wooyoung called you or anything yet?" He clears his throat, quickly adding "I m-mean..I'm not trying to spy on you or anything...I just need to know where we stand."

The smirk that crosses your face is catlike. "Oh..Yeah he did Joongie, we've been texting here and there all day." You give a cute giggle for emphasis on the lie, "I'm not sure what you mean by 'where you stand' though."

He wants to play. Oh, you'll play alright. Your thoughts go to the twisted games he played with you for so long. Surely screwing with him a little isn't going to hurt anything, right?

A huff comes through the line, "I wanna know where I stand with you, Y/N. Did last night change anything for you?" A note of desperation fills your ears. There's those damn butterflies again.

"Kim Hongjoong! How could you ask such a thing? You know a lady never tells." You switch the phone to your other ear. Min Seo creeps over and leans her head over so she can hear, turning the phone more towards her in your hand.

"I just really like you." His sigh into the receiver sends shivers down your neck, "All those things I said last night, and even before, they were all true."

You look over at Min Seo, a shocked look on her faces as she mouths the words "OH. MY. GOD."

Straightening your back in an attempt to get your shit together, you reply "Joongie, I think you're cute... Yes, you're getting somewhere with me." You pause to let it sink in and hit him with the, "BUT, I'm not going to tell you how you stack up against Wooyoung."

"Oh yeah?" You could hear the smirk in his reply, "How about those 'rules' we set up? We still following those?" Your breath caught hearing those words. "Like the 'No getting off till we're together' one?"

Well, you didn't expect this conversation to go there, especially with Min Seo glued to your ear. Her gasp is enough to let you know she heard it. You wipe your face with your hand. Why's it suddenly so hot in here?

"Sure, I'll follow em." You pause for dramatic effect, "But only if you let me talk to San."

"San too?!" he sputters.

"Why not? We can make it between all of you guys and see who wins me then." You snort out a laugh.

"Are you fucking kidding me, Y/N?!"

You gasp, bring a hand up to your chest in mock shock. "Kim Hongjoong, such language!" Your laughing starts to drown out his voice, but you hear him huff through the line again. He's pouting.

"Fine. You wanna play like that? Game on." His voice is darker now, seductive. " I'll let you talk to San. When do I get to see you again?"

"I'd say in about, a week and a half-ish. Minie got us those stupid expensive backstage passes for Busan."

He growls softly. You never knew a sound so quiet could be so sexy, or that Hongjoong could act like this. The butterflies you were feeling in anxiousness were turning into a fire and burning straight to the apex of your thighs.

"A whole half-hour with each of us" He snickers, "You think you can make it that long, Doll?"

His new pet name makes a rosey color spread across your cheeks. Your reply comes out more strained than you wanted, "Can I talk to San now?" I agreed to your terms."

"Sure...You absolutely can. Good luck, Doll. I'll call you soon." Before you can hear him yelling in the background, and hushed voices.

"Hello?" The dark timbre of San's voice comes through the line, and you feel Min Seo's grip on your shoulder as she leans as close as she possibly can to hear him, a smile on her face.

"Hey San, ah...It's Y/N...do you remember me?" rocking your shoulder to get Minie to loosen up her death grip. It doesn't help.

"Min Seo's friend, Yeah." You hear chaos in the background of his end, yelling and San laughing. The word pabo is getting thrown around.

"Uhm yeah. How about Min Seo, what do you think of her?"

More yelling, and you can hear the faint sounds of Jongho singing.

"Min Seo's beautiful, but she's way out of my league."

A slap to your shoulder, "Ow...Oh, I don't think she is San, I think she's perfect for you." smacking back at Min Seo's hands.

"You live with her, don't you Y/N?" His question comes from a more quiet place, he must've moved into another room, "Is she there now, can I talk to her?" You can hear the excitement lacing his voice and Minie promptly falls over onto the couch, squealing with a hand over her mouth.

"Yeah...Sure...Here she is."

The phone gets handed off to her, and you jump up thrusting your hips at her, pumping your fist "MINIE'S GONNA GET SOME.." as loud and obnoxious as humanly possible.

A pillow comes flying at your face, looking over to see Minie with her middle finger out, her phone in her other hand and yours shoved between her head and shoulder as she puts in what looks to be San's number in her contact list.

"Minie! Your face is so red! San really likes you!" you taunt her, as a pillow goes sailing across the room, nailing you in the stomach.

Min Seo hangs up the phone, eyes wide and jaw slack. "I got his number, Y/N." Is she even breathing? "I...I got Choi San's personal number. He told me to text him"

"OooOOo...Minie and Sannie sittin in a tree..." poking at her cheeks you continue, "K-I-S-S-I-N-G"

"Y/N! SHUT IT!" she replies as she tries to hold back her giddy smile.

"Minie's gonna get SOME DICK." you lean closer to her, "and it'll be good dick too. Maybe you won't be so grouchy."

Her only reply as she covers up her smile with her hand is, "Language, Y/N. Language."

#ateez fic #ateez fanfic #ateez fanfiction #Ateez Hongjoong #Hongjoong X You #This chapter sucks #Ohwell #it's here now

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fantroll-purgatory · 6 years

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@time-is-still-a-waste

(This is gonna be fun! I’m sorry if she seems boring though!)

She’s definitely not boring! Themeatically a tiny bit of a mess, but this blog’s got a broom and a dustpan, so we’ll sweep her right into line. From reading through the profile, different things I noticed you mention were optimism, fire/fireworks/explosives, baking, painting, carnivals, phoenixes and therefore implicitly rebirth, a soothing nature and desire to help others…

When you list them all out like that and realize you don’t have a connecting force, it can quickly get a little cluttered-seeming, right?

Well, I have a connecting force. One that’s going to seem like goofily obvious. She should be An Actual Circus Clown. Like not just a fun juggalo ex-cult member but someone who truly believes in the humanesque Principle Of Clownery.

It jives with her optimism and desire to help others because she just wants to make ‘em see the sunny side, she just wants to make ‘em see the funny side! She wants to make ‘em laugh until they cry with- okay I’m done making this carebears joke no one will understand.

Fire easily works for a circus performer, paintings and carnivals obviously work, and rebirth? Well, just take one look at Pennywise.

So now that we’ve got that idea locked in here, we can begin!

Universe: Alternia!

Name: Raizna Ashraz.

“Raizna” was made to sound similar to the word “Raising”, which always seemed to fit her, due to her baking themes (Raising agents), and her optimistic personality (Raising spirits)! Ashraz, simply means “A bundle of torches”, which fits with the fire theme she shares with her Moirail.

I liked the Ra sound and the justification behind the first name, so I wanted to keep it, but I want to do you one better, themeatically. How about Ramkin Ashraz?

Ramkin comes from Ramekin, a small ceramic bowl often used to bake souffles, which, as anyone knows, tend to Rise in the oven. But sometimes they can get too hot and deflate. So, y’know. A fun fact is that etymologically it can be read to mean “little battering ram.”

Age: 8 sweeps, close to 9

Story!: Raizna never really had much luck, with things that happened to her. Being quite unusual for her caste, she (due to no fault of her own, might I add), ended up living with a rustblood, who would later become her moirail. These two, often team up, to set things on fire, but mostly just like fireworks. Preferring to be passive, she tries to hide her own nature, to try and keep her friends safe, to various degrees of success, often baking, and painting to keep up this appearance. When things just started to seem good for the troll, the meteors began falling. This time? She is refusing to think of them as the end. If it would take fighting to survive, then fighting she would do.

I don’t know what the circumstances are, but maybe I can make some recommendations based on the circus clown suggestion I made? She could’ve been a performer for a higher-ranking purple. Then she ditched the church and is here to party with a pal and try to reform himself into someone happier and more pleasant to be around. Getting her anger under control is hard when it was something so accepted as part of a wider cultural persona, but… Baking helps!

Strife Specibus: Bakingkind. (Formerly, Clubkind)

Raizna’s whole theme, was based around baking, and art. So, with a little bit of help, she worked out ways to weaponize her own baked treats.. if only mostly for the aesthetic. She has a set of various pies, filled with explosives, weights and sharp shards of glass, so whoever gets hit with them, gets a nasty (and hopefully explosive) surprise. However, if those aren’t available, she will use a rolling pin, and quite gladly bash people around the face with it.

She could still have a clubkind specibus, since she uses rolling pins as a bludgeon. I think it’s nice for her to keep it on hand. Then she can also utilize, like, juggling torches to whack with.

Fetch Modus: Painting.

Raizna, always finds painting relaxing and loves doing it whenever she can! So, whenever she goes to take something out her modus, she has to paint an image of whatever she wants to get out. The worse she paints it, the worse the condition the item comes out in.

Blood colour: Purple

Raizna, is somewhat of a classic Purpleblood, although she tries her hardest to hide it… to a degree. She still wears her self designed paint with pride. She’s ambitious, stubborn, and a bit emotionally messed up, often hiding her own disappointment with dry and self depreciating humour. However, she is still quite.. volatile, becoming extremely violent when people she cares about are threatened.

Symbol and meaning: Being both Rage, Prospit and Purple, she’s-

TRUE CAPRICORN- THE CAPRICOUS

Honestly I think she might be better off as

CAPRINIUS- THE CREDULOUS.

But we’ll talk about that in a minute.

Trolltag: candiedCarnival [CC]

Candied, is used to reflect her sweet themes, and also to tie in with her sweet personality. It could also reflect her tendency to sugar coat things, that are going on in the world. Carnival, reflects the truth of herself, but also occasionally the fun of them, being places of joy and laughter, things she strives on making people feel.

how about conffectionateCarny, conffectionate is a portmanteau of confection and affectionate, which is a clever way to combine the idea of carnivalous cakes with the idea of her being a sweet person. Carny’s fairly straightforward, but it puts a singular person identifier on it instead of implying she’s the Whole carnival.

Quirk: Raizna isz szuper cheerful! Szo szhe talks with a ton of exclamation marks! Szhe likes adding letters when szhe talks to fit with her name! It’s not like szhe’s bragging or anything! Szhe just likes how it szounds! :}

I gotta be honest, I can’t tell where the sz comes from. She had z’s in her original names I guess? But certainly no sz’s.

What if instead, she replaces her o’s with °‘s? It’s a good reference to her baking interest as well as the theme of fire and heat. Maybe replace P with п? It’s derived from the greek letter Pi, which is a sly reference to Pie! And the letter name means ‘peaceful state’, which implies her interest in making things nice.

Ex: Cheer uп, buttercuп! °r I’ll have t° thr°w a пie in y°ur face!

Special Abilities (if any): Raizna, if perhaps only by sheer nature, is ridiculously resilient . It’s incredibly hard to hurt her properly, or at least. Keep her down. But, if that isn’t counted, she’s just really good at calming people down. It’s like her words have something soothing about them. She does, however have a tendency to get increasing annoyed when doing this, almost like she’s taking their pain, or anger and keeping it for herself.

Now, this isn’t… Purpleblood abilities manifest as a way to keep the lowbloods down. That’s what it’s supposed to be. So maybe you could alter this to be something she really hates having? Something like hideous laughter, maybe? She can use her abilities to make people absolutely lose it with uncontrollable laughter. Maybe she’s trying to work on blunting the effect, somehow? Like making it so that she can make people giggle a little but, but having to suppress the power like that has a negative effect that makes her irritable and headachey?

Ancestor: The Vandal [Aleyna Ashraz, Witch of Rage]

Caught in a war and several rebellions, Aleyna was right at home. Rebelling against her own kind, She’d paint messages of rebellion along the walls of the nobles, with blood that she could find, her own, if necessary.

Quickly gaining fame as a rebel, she kept this image up, stirring up rebellions with her works, and sending messages of danger to those who ruled. This did however, end up with assassins, coming to find for her, only to be led on a wild goose chase. Any of those, that did find her returned back home, scared, although they couldn’t quite describe why.

When the law eventually caught up, she didn’t surrender, and was taken away. What happened to her, was unknown.

Raizna was always interested in her Ancestor, respecting her for speaking up about what she thought was right, in a non-violent way. She often hopes that she had survived, and one day, Raizna hopes that she could do something just as cool.

Ancestors need 8 letter titles! How about The Graphein instead? It’s a Greek word that means To Write and is an etymological root for Graffiti. It still implies the same writing on the walls that you desired, but fits the lettering rules.

Lusus: Her lusus, is a weird combination, of a phoenix and a cat, that she affectionately calls her Birdmum and loves dearly. Raizna often takes food both caught and made to her lusus, as an attempt to return the favour of being brought up by her. Often being very defensive of Raizna, Birdmum often has to guard their hive, meaning she isn’t around very much. They have a mutually caring relationship, and if anything happened to her lusus, Raizna doesn’t know what she’d do.

Purple lusii need to be creatures that cross the land-sea barrier, so Bird Cat doesn’t really satisfy that requirement. Hmm… How about a phoenix turtle instead? Half phoenix, half turtle. It could have feathers on its wings, long tail feathers instead of the short turtle tail. This is because turtles are known to be long-living, so it fits the immortal theme alright. It’s also a sly reference to The Phoenix and the Turtle, which is about a lot of things but The Death Of An Ideal is one of the core themes and it fits well with the hope switch I’ve given to her.

Personality: Raizna is obnoxiously cheerful. Or at least, that’s what most people think. She often goes out of her way, to make people happy, either by feeding away their woes, listening to them, or calming them down with soft words. Often doing things out of her own kindness, many people are drawn to her for aid. She does, have a fondness for helping people, and will often go out of her way to do tasks for people, even if that means beating the hell out of somebody who hurt one of her friends, or stealing. Normally quite calm, she’s often cheerful, always fighting with her own dark urges. When she’s angry, or if her own nature takes over, she can be brutal, murderous and cunning, all the things she often hates about herself. With a deep hatred of lies, and lying, she’s incredibly honest, to the point of being brutally honest sometimes. However, at the top of everything, she puts others first, with very little care for herself.

I really like this base for her personality, like a LOT. I think you should pull some of the clowniness I’ve suggested, though. Maybe have her crack jokes for her friends, or do little performances. Maybe she’s willing to sacrifice her dignity to make her pals laugh. Maybe she’s always willing to throw a pie in her own face to get a giggle. She wants to be a good friend, and she tries to keep up under wraps with these jokes, maybe sometimes with pranks? Just trying to vent it out in any way possible.

The rest of the stuff is really good. Give her a STRONG conviction for honesty, helping people, and doing what’s right. Because convictions are very important with hope-aligned players.

Interests: Baking, Painting, Writing, FLARP (to a degree. She doesn’t play much anymore), Sociology, Fire and “Magic” .

Maybe she plays FLARP but she likes to change the F to mean Funny. Funny Live Action Role Play. You know those people in MMOs who are like high level and terrifying and you’re so scared they’re going to kill your weak little level 1 character? and then they roll up and hand you like 4000 silver for literally no reason and tell you to go buy a horse? That could be her.

You should add a general clowniness here. If she used to use clubs, she probably knows how to juggle! Maybe she could like fire spitting as well. And some pranks! Harmless fun! Fire crackers and noise makers and confetti poppers!

Appearence: Raizna, has never been one to draw attention to herself. She keeps her long curly hair, that’s practically impossible to brush loose. You could probably find a plushie or two in there, if you tried hard enough. Often wearing a plain black shirt, and fluffy black pyjama trousers, she often seems like a mess, to the annoyance of a few of her friends. Quite.. disturbingly, she’s often covered in bright colours, from her painting. However, some lowbloods mistake the paint, for being the blood of people she’s killed, causing uneeded fear.

At all times, she wears her makeup, flame like patterns coating her eyes, and brim of her nose. Streaking down from her lips, are swirls of white and red that stand out against her skin. She virtually never takes off the makeup, and just puts more on each day, without washing the previous day’s makeup off. To keep with her messy theme, she wears soft slippers everywhere. I mean. Literally everywhere. Even when dressed up formally.

She seems cute! I’ll see how I can communicate this in sprite form.

Title: Thief Of Rage.

I’ve always had her, as quite a soothing character, so I figured somebody who stole peoples negative emotions, could be quite a good idea, which is why I originally started with a thief. I couldn’t decide on if I should make her a heart, or rage player.

I eventually decided on rage, and although I don’t think the go to version of the aspect particularly fits her. She can be selfish in a way, so I suppose it still fits!

I think that she’s in a kind of good place, theoretically, as a person. So I think maybe Rogue of Hope might be a good title for her.

She’s someone who cares a lot about others, who has a strong sense of justice and what is right and what needs to be done, and she’s not afraid to do it for others. AND she moves the anger around via her powers. She passively moves hope and positivity and potential onto others, lightening their moods, while actively taking on rage, which she turns into a weapon.

Land: The Land of Fire and Fear.

Raizna’s hive was just destined to be something fiery. I mean, with a phoenix for a lusus that was just fate wasn’t it. She just wasn’t quite expecting it to be on an active volcano. So when she eventually left her hive, and got hit by the freezing cold winds, she decided immediately. Nope. Don’t like cold. Cold things are bad.

So she ran inside again. Like a coward. That was, until said volcano erupted, lava burning away and melting the ice that covered her land. Just her luck. Right?

However, despite all that destruction.. there was something beautiful about the whole ideal. As fire and lava ran across the land that was home, she soon decided one thing.

Maybe destruction can be pretty.

I see what you’re going for here, fire that’s pretty, but… I want to try to push that idea further than just lava flowing over the ground. How about…

Land of Glass and Paraffin, a land where leaping balls of flaming accelerant jump across the land, melting down the glassed surface, creating beautiful swirls, an ever-shifting pattern, molten-hot and deadly, but so wonderfully beautiful you can’t look away. There is always potential for something new, something beautiful, in the mutating surface. But she also has to find hope for the consorts, who live on a molten nightmare planet.

Dream Planet: Prospit.

Raizna, is a Prospit dreamer to a point. She’s optimistic, bubbly and cheerful! However, she does hold some of Derse’s dissatisfaction towards the world, simply due to just how wrong she finds everything. Following what some people do.. would just be lying to herself. Fate, however she does believe in. Fate, and Miracles.

Design:

Horns: I wanted to make them look like the new symbol I gave her. So very curly, fun, and huge.

Hair: I made it a big curly mess just like you suggested. I tried to make the curls come off a lot of larger round shapes, mostly because I wanted to summon the image of a clown wig at least tangentially.

Eyes: Because I liked my own joke too much, I wanted to base her eyes just slightly off of Funshine bear from Journey to Joke-a-lot. And to make her just a little goofy looking, because that was kind of my goal for the whole design, I made her almost cross-eyed.

Mouth: I wanted her to have big scary teeth to hint at her more dangerous nature.

Makeup: I utilized red for some flamey eye makeup, some lines down the face, and the outer part of some cheek dots. I used yellow for her lips and the inner part of the cheek dots to try to bring a bright cheeriness, to hit on some more fire-themed colors, and to make her look goofy, once again.

Shirt: I made the shirt slipping off one shoulder, to aid her messy image. I also like how it bunched the collar of the shirt, because now it’s vaguely reminiscent of a clown frill. I only added a few splotches of blood because her design was already busy color-wise and I didn’t want to overwhelm it.

Pants: I made some loose pajama pants from Karkat’s pants and edited them to be purple. I wanted to carry the yellow down here, too, so she gets stripey pants!

Slippers: They’re just edited from a fan-troll spritesheet to be in her purple color-family.

She’s a really cute character! Thank you for sharing!

-CD

#time is still a waste #raizna ashraz #ramkin ashraz #raizna #ramkin #ashraz #purpleblood #review #redesign #cd review #submission

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gripefroot · 3 years

Text

The One Where Everyone Knows

Stuttering around a corner, Steve’s face is flaming hot as he tries to calm himself, walking sedately into the kitchen as a number of curious stares greet him. He glances around - sees who’s there and who’s sleeping with their head on the table (Clint) - and gives a fervent warning that probably none of them deserve:

“Don’t go down the west corridor toward the fire exit.”

Tony groans from the sink, where he’s rinsing out the coffee pot. Sam takes a moment - face twisting with confusion before warping into revulsion, and Natasha lifts a brow as she sips from her cup of tea.

“You’re a bit red, Steve,” she comments. “Where are they doing it this time?”

He scrunches his nose, and mumbles, “Storage closet.”

“I thought I saw 28 going that way,” Nat muses.

“Yeah,” Steve says, heart still hammering with residual terror. “I was gonna meet Bucky on his way up from the gym to go over our reports from the last mission - but apparently I’m not the person he wanted to meet.”

“Yuck,” Sam says.

“Ew,” says Tony.

“Of course not,” Natasha says. “I think they’re cute.”

“They’re nasty,” Sam retorts.

“Cute,” Nat enunciates, and Steve moves further into the kitchen to inspect a bowl full of fruit. It’ll help settle his stomach. Natasha adds, “Cute that they think they’re pulling the wool over our eyes.”

“It’s pretty impressive how 28 reroutes the cameras each time,” Tony says, turning ‘round to refill the coffee machine. “I mean, I know she does it, but on a stupider system she’d definitely get away with it.”

“I don’t think anyone downstairs or over at SHIELD knows about them,” Sam says after a moment. “That’s pretty impressive, too.”

“Right,” Natasha agrees dryly. “If they weren’t up against the best spies and superhumans in the world…”

Tony sighs. “Wouldn’t it just be easier to out them? Get this over with?”

“No!” Steve says loudly, and Clint gives an enormous snort - but doesn’t wake up. After a tense pause, Steve adds, “Look, this entire thing is a little weird. Bucky has never been this way in his life - sneaking around, I mean. But how much happier he is when 28’s around? I refuse to allow us to compromise that.”

Natasha blinks. Sam grins, and scoops up more cereal. Tony just rolls his eyes.

“Might be happier if they didn’t have to do it in closets,” Stark says.

“Yeah, then we’d have to put up with them pawing each other in public places, too,” Sam says dryly.

“They wouldn’t,” Steve insists.

“They might,” Natasha shrugs.

“I’ll get a spray bottle,” Tony suggests. “Put bleach in it or something. Set Dum-E on them. That’ll teach ‘em.”

“We’re not doing anything,” Steve interrupts loudly, and finally decides on an apple. “We’re leaving them be. They’ll tell us when - if - they’re ready.”

Eyes unfocusing, Natasha stirs her tea absently. “Now that you mention it, I don’t think I’ve ever seen 28 like this, either. She’s pretty upfront about things.”

“Does she date a lot of super-serum people?” Sam jokes.

“Upfront about her real name? Backstory?” Tony teases next - but he gets a full-on glare for that.

“Closed files aren't that closed, first off,” Nat says. “Second, I am now on their side about keeping what they have from the rest of us. You guys are jerks.”

“Jerks that have to hear what they’re doing behind closed doors, right Steve?” Sam laughs. Steve, face getting hot again, just shakes his head. Clint gives another snore, and this time his head lifts slightly - bleary eyes blinking around.

“Good morning,” Natasha says cheerily.

“How’d I get here?” Clint mumbles, grinding the palm of his hand against his eyes.

“Don’t ask me. You were here when I got here.”

“What’s going on? What’re you guys talking about? You woke me up.”

Steve exchanges a look with Sam - Natasha with Tony.

“Nothing important,” Steve says at last. Just in time, too - two sets of footsteps are drawing near, and as Sam rolls his eyes and stands to take his empty bowl to the sink, you and Bucky enter the kitchen, side by side and so obviously beaming that Steve nearly gags again.

“I like the new weights you got downstairs,” Bucky says to Tony with a grin. You’re already sliding into Sam’s empty seat, eyes on Natasha as you ask in her a low voice,

“Did you get that mass text that Pete from IT apparently sent all the women in the Tower?”

Deflection, Steve thinks to himself with a sigh. Of course. It would work on anyone else - he returns Bucky’s smile with a strained one of his own as Bucky goes to the refrigerator for a water bottle - but, alas.

“Your shorts are on backwards,” Sam says to Bucky.

“Oh. Oops. I’ll switch them around later.”

“Not here, please,” Natasha says.

“No, definitely do it here,” you laugh. “We all want the show, Bucky.”

Bucky glares over his shoulder in your direction, cheeks tinged with pink. But you just shrug, still smiling. “Don’t you know, Buck?” you ask innocently. “Half the women here are ga-ga over you.”

Sam’s eyes roll so hard Steve is surprised they didn’t pop out of his head. Tony’s fingers are clenched on his piping hot mug of coffee. Natasha just smiles.

“Who wouldn’t be?” Bucky shoots back, taking a slug of water.

“This is creating images in my mind that I do not want,” Sam says.

“Women like Bucky?” Clint asks with a yawn. Still half-asleep. “I didn’t know they were so into the grumpy type.”

Sam laughs - and reaches over to give Clint a high-five. Natasha snorts, and you hide a giggle behind your hand. And Steve finds himself shaking his head, once again. He tosses his apple core in the disposal bin.

“C’mon, Buck,” Steve says, because he can’t handle this tension anymore. “Let’s go work on those reports.”

Bucky’s expression falls. A twinge of guilt in Steve’s stomach, but since he’ll be remembering yours and Bucky’s mingled grunts and moans the rest of the day - he thinks it’s pretty fair.

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belladonnaandulriched · 4 years

Text

the artist | chapter twenty-three

I was on the phone with Joey for what I had originally hoped to be a few minutes. Instead, a short amount of time wound up being several minutes. My mind was a blur and he was a mess: we had to console each other. It turns out he didn't actually puke but it felt as though he was about to.

“I've got the worst stomachache after hearin' that,” he confessed to me. “Of course, it pales in comparison to what happened to you, though—” I could hear his throat tightening up at the thought. It was without question that he didn't take the news so easy. I tried to calm him down even though he was in tears. I wanted to be there with him, to assure him that I was okay, even though I saw the image of that man over me every time I blinked my eyes. I wanted to snuggle with him. I wanted to put my arms around his little body: helping him would help me, too, I was sure of it.

“Do—Do ya wanna video each other?” he asked me in a near slurred voice. “I wanna see you but I can't necessarily leave the speakeasy, though. Will does have a desktop computer in the back room—I'll use that.”

“Yeah, yeah—lemme grab my computer and bring it up. I'll add you to my list so we can chat better. Sit tight for me, okay?”

He sniffled. “Okay, okay—I'm just jbelladonna,” he said. “No bullshittin' around, you know?”

“Oh, yeah! Is it all lowercase like that?”

“Yeah, yeah.”

I still had yet to video chat with Chris so to add another boy's name to my chat list made it seem so odd. I was going around with another boy, without anyone else knowing, and at that point, I was to have a little virtual meeting with him.

All of those memories of meetings with my old teachers came back to haunt me as I opened it up. Turning things in at weird times of the day and having things like the sound drop out during a class session, it all lingered within my memory like a horde of ghosts, which coupled with the memory of the incident on the street only added to my anxiety. I also witnessed the memories of watching Anthrax and Metallica on live stream, too. Looking into Joey's brown eyes gazing right back at me, even as he was on the other side of a screen and thousands of miles away.

I sang back to him. I had to whisper sing given my mom was right down the hall working on the phone, but I sang back to him.

I plugged in the name and called him.

His dark handsome face appeared before me. He hunched his narrow shoulders to which he rested his chin upon those sinewy strong hands. His fluffy curled bangs dangled down over those brown eyes, now bloodshot from crying. I wanted to hold him right then and there as I put on my earphones.

“So what the hell was this guy thinkin'?” were the first words out of his mouth. “'I'm just gonna come to these two women and go out rapin'' like some twat waffle?”

“I have no idea,” I confessed to him with a shrug.

“What'd'you say he looked like? Tall and pudgy?”

“Tall and porky, rather,” I corrected him, which made him giggle.

“Porky!” he declared with a break in his voice.

“Porky as all hell. Porky like my pussy.”

“Oh, damn.” That got even louder chuckle out of him.

“Made my pussy leak and so now he's havin' to clean up with a mop and bucket behind his wife's back.”

Joey covered his mouth to stifle his laughter. He leaned back in his chair and hunkered down to hide his face, but it was no use. He let his hands off of his mouth and he burst out laughing.

“They say laughter is the best medicine, Joseph,” I declared.

“The hell it is!” He lifted his head up and gave his black curls a toss back from his face: I loved how round and full his face got when he wore a large and genuine grin like that. Perfect for kisses. It was the very sight of his round face wherein I had an idea.

“I oughta draw something right here while I'm at my computer,” I suggested; I had done a couple of demos for my art teacher when I was in school and if nothing, that was the only thing the video app never screwed up whilst in operation. “You know. Do a live drawing session with just you as my audience.” He raised his eyebrows at me.

“You gotta,” he encouraged me with that cute lopsided little smile and a lean forward to the monitor screen. “Do it. It's in you. It's in those hands. Those fingers. The slimy, smarmy fuck-ass has got nuthin' on you.”

“Did you just call him a 'fuck-ass'?” I had to laugh at that.

“Yeah, 'cause he likes to fuck and he's an ass. He raped my girlfriend—” He put a hand over his mouth, but the word had already slipped out. I gasped. That rich flush of warmth bloomed over my face and the reddish hue to his eyes returned.

“Did—” I sputtered. “Did you just—”

His brown eyes grew large, like a pair of marbles. I didn't move. I couldn't breathe. And then he lowered his hand to show me his trembling bottom lip: those same dark lips as smooth as candy.

“I think I just did,” he confessed in a near whisper.

“Joey, I—” I pursed my lips together. “I—I don't even know what to say right now. Oh my God.”

“I'm sorry,” he said in a small voice.

“No,” I insisted. “No, no, no, no. Don't be. Please. Don't be. You—You feel that way about me. Don't be sorry, Joey. Please don't be sorry.”

He swallowed and he bowed his head at me: he rested his hands in his lap. He was adorable already, but even cuter and sweeter when the cat was let out of the bag. I had to show him a smile. Even after having been enraptured on the street a little while ago and hearing him go nuts over the phone about it, I still came out of it smiling. I still came out of it feeling butterflies in my stomach at the realization that Joey liked me.

“So... ya wanna—ya wanna do that for me?” he asked me in a sweet voice.

“Yeah. Sure thing—just let me get my pad and my pen and plug everything in.”

“Plug it into the hole?” he teased me.

“Plug it into the hole, yes!” I laughed at that as I reached to my right for the black bag holding the drawing pad, the cord, and the stylus. I hooked up the pad to the computer and then opened up my drawing app. I also turned on the option for split screen so he could watch me.

“So whaddya wanna draw up?” he asked.

“Well, since—that—happened, I'm thinking something of catharsis. Something that'll take the pain away. Something for me to reclaim control of everything.”

“Control of the mind, body, and soul.”

“Exactly! My mind—” Using the stylus, I drew down the girl's head on a square that was a very dark shade of orange for some added intensity. Her hair swooped back behind her head, like the streamers of a curtain in a high wind. Every so often, I glanced over at him as he watched me with intent. He rested his chin upon his hands and his brown eyes watched my every move on the screen—even when I switched pens and when I chose selections to color her in.

“My body,” I said at one point as I sketched down her body, slender and full of curves. As I reached her breasts and the space between her legs, I felt my shoulders and my back tighten up. My lips still ached from where it hit me. So forceful. So hard. So wrong and leaving me without any sort of grip on anything whatsoever, and yet there I was holding the pen. Still holding the pen.

He looked over at me without moving his head. He knitted his eyebrows at me.

“Are you alright?” he asked me. I sighed through my nose.

“Hahlly?”

I pursed my lips together again. I swallowed and sighed through my nose again.

I managed to draw her hips and the naked insides of her thighs. I changed the color to red. Bright fiery red.

I sketched down roses between her legs: I colored in the petals with a rich shade of red, the color of red wine and my poor lower lips. I kept my eyes fixated on the drawing; out of the corner of my eye, I noticed Joey hadn't budged or lifted a finger. He was hypnotized by the sight of it.

I gave her the full treatment with the airbrushes and even a couple of copic pens for the finishing touches; I gave the flowers all a rich bright glow. The control was mine. The light was within me. Within time, I had a naked lady against a dark background with fiery red roses in between her legs and bright pearly white lilies upon her nipples. I thought of Dave and Stone and their garden; I knew I would have to sneak in there at some point and be alone with the flowers. It would give me some time alone, to really reclaim myself and stay in with the earth.

I signed my name at the bottom and leaned back in my chair. Joey lowered his hands and raised his eyebrows at it.

“Holy shit,” he muttered. I set the pad down on my lap and let out a low whistle. I gazed on at him.

“You should get that printed and put it in the gallery,” he suggested.

“You—You don't think it's too heavy?” I asked, mortified, to which he shook his head.

“Hey, if it was healin' for you, it has'ta be healin' for someone else if they wish. Just watchin' you do it calmed me down a great deal.”

“What would Chris and Lars think?”

“Just tell 'em what happened,” he suggested. “They gotta know what happened to their artist. They'll understand, too—especially Lars.”

“You think so?”

“Absolutely. Hahlly, trust me—they're like me. We're all a buncha guys who love what we do an' love the people who make us who we are. They'll understand.”

He hesitated there for a second before I heard something in the background.

“What was that?”

“I think that was Will—” He craned his neck back for a glimpse into the main room. “Yeah, it is. This is his computer, too. I dunno how he'd react to this, if I'm honest.”

“Wait, what about him?” I asked him.

"What about what? Oh, you mean..."

"Yeah."

“Better if you tell 'em in person, if you ask me," he requested with a nervous swallow. "I don't wanna tell him.”

“I don't blame ya." I took a brief glimpse down to the floor. "So—talk later?”

“Of course! Call me any time, Hahlls. Day or night, rain or shine—makes no difference to me as long as I get to hear your voice and you get to hear mine.” He was about to talk off his earphones and sign off when I stopped him.

“Also, Joey?”

“Yes?” He hung there with his hands over his ears.

“I love you.”

His face softened and his shoulders slumped a bit. Those brown eyes turned to liquid, like rich hot chocolate.

“I love you, too,” he said back to me in a clear voice. “And gt yourself to the ER if ya haveta, too.”

“I'll try,” I promised him, and we both signed off at the same time.

#the artist #the artist fanfic #the artist chapters #chapter 23 #fanfic #fanfiction #anthrax fanfic #anthrax #joey belladonna #joey belladonna fanfic #writing #fan writing #sci fi writing #artistry #also on ao3 #text #dark romance

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ancientbooshartifacts · 5 years

Text

A Bit Rubbish

Author: IDeserveYou

Year: 2013

Rating: NC-17

Pairing: Naboo/Dennis, Naboo/Saboo, Dennis/Methuselah, Howince, Saboo/Methuselah

Fuck, Naboo thinks wearily, leaning against the kitchen table and surveying the wreckage of his once cosy flat.Why the fuck did I say that we’d throw a Christmas party this year? I should have just bullied Howard into cooking turkey for the four of us as usual. Not let Vince invite half of Camden and then gone mad myself and invited the entire Board of Shamen because it seemed like a good idea at the time. I wasn’t born yesterday. I should’ve known. There is a groan and a loud snore from the sofa. Yeah, and I know you did a good job getting rid of the last few paralytics, Bollo, but if you don’t get your act together with the clearing-up tomorrow, I’ll take back what I said about not getting an upgraded familiar. This place is a disaster zone. I don’t even know where to start. Mechanically, Naboo picks up an empty crisp packet from the table, balls it up and chucks it at the bin. See that? Missed. Story of my Christmas. Story of my fuckin’ life. Dunno why I bother. He snorts. Saboo would say that a lot of the time I don’t. He was on good form tonight, hardly acknowledged my existence except to insult me but why change the habit of a lifetime? And why – he kicks irritably at the crumpled packet, knocking it under the worktop – why did he have to look so fuckin’ hot in that red jumpsuit and Santa hat? That’s Vince’s job, mind you he was rockin’ the sparkly angel look and I didn’t see Howard complaining… He glances along the passageway; the light under Vince’s bedroom door has gone out and all is quiet. All right for some. I know, I shouldn’t begrudge them, they are sort-of my friends I suppose and we’ve been through a lot together, why shouldn’t they get what they want for Christmas? He sighs. C’m’on, Naboo, you plum, it could be worse. You're Naboo, that's who, an' you're self-sufficient. You could be stuck with someone who argues with you the whole time. That bitch of a wife of Dennis’s, honestly, she’s well fit but what else does he see in her? Beats me, always has. She’s never happy, can’t just take the D-Man as he is… well OK, he is pretty hopeless and he can’t take his eyes off a pretty pair of boobs in a tinsel basque, but she didn’t have to hit him quite so hard. Fuck, what was that? There’s a scrabbling noise on the roof, and a sudden thud. Burglars? Better wake Bollo – no, hang on a sec, that click, that’s the latch on the skylight, hear that often enough with those two goin’ out on the roof to snog, but they’re in bed so who was up there? ‘Has – has everybody gone?’ a hoarse and hopeless voice asks from somewhere near the top of the stairs. ‘Most of ’em.’ Naboo detaches himself from the table and clicks the landing light on. Oh, the poor sod. I should’ve known.

‘Dennis? What the fuck were you doin’ on the roof?’ ‘It was cold up there.’ Dennis is shivering, swaying on his feet; Naboo isn’t entirely sure he knows where he is or who’s talking to him. ‘You bin out there all that time?’ Naboo kicks himself for a thoughtless git. It must be two hours at least since the fight, and once the music was turned back on and the drink was flowing again, nobody had bothered to ask where the loser had gone. ‘Yes.’ Dennis’s robes are askew, his peacock feather headdress is bent and crumpled, and there is a blackening bruise on his cheekbone. That wife of his is a bitch. A lean, lithe, snarling wild animal in a gold minidress. She really did hit him hard. Punishing her mate for his roving eye, and then taking her revenge… ‘Come on in an’ get warm, then.’ Naboo gestures towards the kitchen. But Dennis seems to be having trouble focusing. ‘Cold is good. Clarifies the mind. Assists in the rethinking of basic principles and the suppression of the animal passions… Where is she?’ ‘Gone back to yours.’ ‘Very sensible.’ Naboo takes a deep breath, and adds the rest of it, the two words he really didn’t want to say: ‘With Saboo.’ Dennis gives an approving nod. ‘Well, that’s… very gallant of him. Methuselah is not much of a carpet driver at the best of times. And tonight wasn’t exactly the best of times. I’m sure he’ll see her safely home…’ Naboo can’t help shaking his head to try to shift the image still burned into his shaman-senses, the two figures tightly entwined, gold against red, Saboo’s big hands splayed across tanned skin... The Head Shaman’s milky blue eyes grow suddenly sharp. They look at Naboo, and through him, and right to the core of him, and there is no hiding place. ‘I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.’ Dennis takes a wobbly step towards Naboo and reaches out, no doubt meaning to put a kindly hand on his shoulder, as he has done many times before. He staggers and almost falls; Naboo grabs him round the waist, and hangs on. Dennis wraps his arms around Naboo, and pulls him into an awkward hug. ‘I didn’t know… I never saw. Never looked.’ Naboo's not quite sure what's happening here; he'd expected to be being sorry for Dennis, not the other way round. But it does feel good to be held by someone. Beggars can't be choosers... ‘Nuffink you could’ve done anyway,’ he mutters into the front of Dennis’s robes. ‘Probably not.’ Dennis heaves a huge sigh. ‘I am somewhat inexpert in affairs of the heart. Otherwise I should not be here now, I should be tucked up in bed with a cup of cocoa and…’ Naboo gives him a sympathetic squeeze. ‘Yeah, I know. We’re a bit rubbish at this, aren’t we?’ ‘Naboo, I am grateful for your support. Yes, we are a bit rubbish at this. In fact we are a bit rubbish at many things. Sometimes I wonder whether the Board of Shamen itself is not actually a bit rubbish. Ditto the Head Shaman.’ ‘Oi, Big D, don’t talk like that. We get enough of that bullshit from Tony fuckin’ Harrison.’ Naboo stares hard into his leader’s troubled face. ‘We need you, Dennis. You’re doin’ good. So what, the Board may be a bit rubbish, but that don’t mean it ain’t still got magic…’ Dennis turns his head away; looks up at the landing ceiling. Naboo looks too, and suddenly they are both very still. Stuck to the lampshade by a curling piece of Sellotape, one single tatty sprig of mistletoe droops forlornly among the abandoned party streamers and tinsel, its leaves wilting and its three berries dull and shrivelled. ‘Bit rubbish,’ Naboo whispers. Dennis looks down at him, and their eyes meet. Naboo has no idea whether he is prompted by hope, or loneliness, or pity, or just sheer bloody-minded determination to wring some sort of fucking seasonal cheer out of this fucking rubbish Christmas; but he stands on tiptoe and reaches up to pull Dennis’s head down for a kiss, and as their mouths meet and they lose themselves in each other, he knows the magic’s still working. Well enough to be going on with, anyway. They can worry about the rest in the morning.

‘Can.. can I stay?’ Dennis’s voice is muffled in Naboo’s hair. Naboo squeezes him tight. ‘Course.’ He’s reluctant to move, and break the spell; it’s nice just standing here all wrapped around someone else, someone he doesn’t have to explain or apologise or protest to, someone who understands… His mouth still tingles from their kiss. The Head Shaman is a good kisser: not the most expert Naboo’s ever encountered in his long life, but passionate, sincere, generous. And heartbreakingly desperate for affection. ‘Naboo…’ Naboo loosens his hold a little, and looks up. ‘One more for the road?’ Dennis is smiling, a bit shyly, his lips all pink and full, and it’s impossible to resist kissing him again. This time he doesn’t draw back in alarm when Naboo licks at the corner of his mouth, he opens up and lets him slip his tongue in. Naboo’s careful not to overdo it, breaking off as Dennis’s breathing quickens. He takes the older man’s arm. ‘C’m on, then. I fink Bollo’s kicked all the drunks out of my bed.’ But Dennis still hangs back. ‘Naboo, I am not asking for… I mean, I would not presume… but I would take it as a kindness if you would permit me to wake up just once with you beside me. I have often wished…’ ‘But never asked.’ ‘The time was never right.’ ‘Tis now, though. An’ I’d like that too. But, Dennis…’ ‘I know.’ Dennis strokes a thumb along Naboo’s cheekbone. ‘This is a one-off under exceptional circumstances. You need have no fear that our professional relationship will be compromised by… whatever may or may not happen in the next few hours. Or that I will make demands upon you afterwards.’ ‘I wasn’t scared of that. I just don’t want you to think –’ ‘I don’t think, Naboo. I know this isn’t love. I am well aware that both of our hearts are spoken for. Now can we just go to bed? My feet are freezing.’ ‘Alright.’ There’s a lump in Naboo’s throat that makes it hard to say more. He clicks the landing light off. Dennis wraps an arm around his shoulders and they start to pick their way across the rubbish-strewn lounge, careful not to awaken the snoring Bollo on the sofa. The bedroom’s almost as cold as the landing. Naboo locks the door, sticks the electric fire on, pulls the curtains, switches on the bedside lamp, turns the covers down on the bed… Dennis is still standing just inside the door, staring into space. ‘Second thoughts?’ Naboo hopes not; they’ve made such a good start. ‘No, I…’ Dennis takes a couple of steps towards the bed. ‘Sorry. Tuned out there for a moment. There is, um, quite a considerable residual odour of illicit substances in here.’ He glances uneasily at the hookah on the dressing table. ‘Unsettled me a little. But I’m sure I’ll be fine.’ Naboo grins. ‘Don’t worry, I’m not plannin’ to get you high. Not with drugs anyway. An’ I’ve had plenty for today, might need a top-up later but I won’t smoke if I do. I think there’s some hashcakes in the fridge if Bollo hasn’t pigged them all.’ ‘Thank you. That’s… very thoughtful of you.’ ‘Dennis, for fuck’s sake stop bein’ so polite an’ get into bed. I don’t want to be up in front of the Board tryin’ to explain how I let the Head Shaman freeze to death in my own bedroom.’ Naboo puts his turban on the table beside the lamp, kicks his curly trainers under the bed, strips his own robes off over his head and drops them on the floor, and is about to take his trousers off too when a hoarse voice says ‘Stop.’ Dennis is standing on the other side of the bed, wearing only a pair of very small, very purple pants and a rather nervous expression. ‘OK, underwear’s fine, one step at a time eh?’ Naboo pulls the duvet down a little further, and gestures encouragingly at the bed. ‘No, you misunderstand me, I do want them to come off…’ Dennis swallows. ‘But I should like to be the one to take them off. If you would let me.’ ‘Course.’ Heart beating fast, Naboo walks round the end of the bed to stand by Dennis. ‘All yours.’ Dennis sets his big hands very carefully on Naboo’s hips; hesitates a moment, then pushes the waistband of the silk trousers down, and lets go. The fabric slides to the floor, and Naboo steps clear. He can feel Dennis’s eyes on him, looking him up and down. ‘Beautiful,’ Dennis murmurs. ‘So beautiful…’ Naboo shivers. ‘An’ also so frozen.’ He burrows into the colourful pile of duvets and blankets on the bed. ‘Never got used to the climate on this planet… Dennis? You comin’ to join me or what?’ Even stripped to his underpants, the Head Shaman cuts an imposing figure: tall and well-muscled, holding himself very upright as he looks down at the bed. Naboo wants to wrap himself around that big body and warm it up; he wonders what’s holding Dennis back now. ‘You want me to put the light out?’ ‘No.’ Dennis gives an emphatic shake of his head. ‘No, I want to see… to see you. If that’s all right.’ Dennis takes a deep breath. ‘And I have nothing to hide from you.’ He slips the purple briefs down over his hips, and steps out of them. He’s already half-hard… and woah, that is big. Naboo hasn’t got a lot of experience of full-males, whether from Xooberon or from Earth, but you don’t share a flat with Vince Noir without getting the occasional eyeful you didn’t want to see, and since Vince and Howard have been an item there have been a lot more mornings when Howard’s wandered happily into the kitchen in his underpants… Dennis is of similar build and, it seems, similarly well endowed. And now, finally, he’s getting into bed. Naboo pulls the covers over him before he can change his mind. ‘You’re warm.’ Dennis reaches for him and pulls him close. ‘So warm…’ So this is what it’s like to be in bed with the most powerful bloke in the galaxy. He’s shivering and chilled and awkward and clumsy but he feels and smells so good… Naboo presses himself against Dennis’s side, craving the contact and the comfort. This might be second-best, it might not be love, and it might not be what he’d really wanted for Christmas, but still he’s not going to be writing to Santa to complain. Whatever happens. Or doesn’t. Looks like it might, actually. Dennis is pulling him in for a kiss, and this time he’s taking the initiative, slipping his tongue gently into Naboo’s mouth while caressing the nape of his neck in a way that makes his spine tingle. And all the while that big hot hardness is making its presence felt, nudging at Naboo’s hip; either Dennis hasn’t noticed it yet or he isn’t bothered by it, but either way that’s good. Naboo reaches up to touch Dennis’s face; Dennis flinches and draws a sharp breath. ‘Sorry, I forgot about your battle scars… You want me to get you something for that?’ ‘No, it’s fine, I’d forgotten about it too to be honest. And I expect I’ll forget about it again in a minute. At least, that is, if you… Naboo, I know I said I just want to wake up beside you, but do you think… could we…’ The lump in Naboo’s throat is back, and this time he can’t stop it from overflowing into tears. ‘Course we could. You’ve waited so long, and you never put pressure on me… You’re a diamond, Dennis, I don’t know anyone else who’d have done that for me… you’re the best… I’m sayin’ that an’ I’ve bin in love with someone else for years...’ He sniffs, and wipes his eyes on the duvet cover. ‘Sorry, I’m bein’ an idiot. C’m’ere.’ He strokes Dennis’s flat stomach; works his way down to the soft thatch of hair in his groin, and finally wraps a hand around his cock, and starts to work it slowly, up and down. Dennis is breathing heavily. ‘That’s… that’s so good, Naboo… but it’s not… What can I do for you? Do you want me to –’ ‘It’s OK for now. I’m more of a long-term project, y’know?’ ‘But this is all one way…’ ‘Listen.’ Naboo pins Dennis down with a hand on each shoulder; looks into his eyes. ‘You’ve spent three hundred and something years givin’ to me. That’s what you do, D-Man, you give. To me, to the Board, to whoever… An’ I figure it’s time for someone to give somethin’ back, an’ for you to let yourself take it. Let me give you a good time, let me listen to your troubles, let me warm your feet up an’ be there when you wake up in the morning. That’s not one-way, it’s what I wanna do an’ it’ll be a pleasure.’ ‘If you’re sure…’ ‘Course I am. An’ you can see it’s true.’ Dennis heaves a sigh, and relaxes. ‘Thank you.’ ‘No worries. Now, where were we? Aww look, now I’ll have to start all over again.’ Full-male bits do his head in, they’re so robustly masculine but at the same time so terribly vulnerable, all outside the body with nowhere to hide. Dennis’s prick feels heavy and soft in his hand, the skin at the tip like silk. Already it’s stirring, hardening again, and it doesn’t take long before it’s rigid and weeping and Dennis has rolled onto his side and is thrusting against Naboo, seeking release. Naboo’s never known anybody need sex so badly. Not even himself. Dennis is whimpering now, quickening the pace, and Naboo wraps his other hand around him and tightens his grip. A tremor runs through Dennis’s body, and Naboo can feel how close he is; and also that he’s holding back, still afraid that this is unwelcome after all. ‘Let it go,’ Naboo murmurs. ‘It’s OK, I’ve got you, you can come for me…’ And Dennis does, his hips jerking out of control, his mouth buried in Naboo’s hair to muffle the funny little mewling sounds he can’t help making. Naboo smiles to himself. He’s heard Howard make sounds like that, trying to be quiet, but the walls in this place are thin… Vince, of course, has never even bothered trying. Dennis just keeps coming and coming; Naboo holds him and helps him ride it out. There’s wet everywhere, slick between their bodies. It’s sticky and uncomfortable and it smells of wet flour and sex, but Naboo doesn’t care. It’s worth any amount of extra laundry just to see the blissful expression on Dennis’s face as the aftershocks die down and leave him limp and panting. ‘Wow.’ Naboo kisses Dennis on the forehead. ‘That was pretty intense.’ ‘It was… it was… Thank you. Just… thank you. But I’m sorry…’ Dennis squirms in the wet patch on the sheet. ‘If I’d known it’d make such a mess…’ ‘It’s OK, got tissues somewhere.’ Naboo reaches for the box and dries what he can reach. ‘I should…’ Dennis is still trembling and incoherent. ‘No, you shouldn’t.’ Naboo pats him on the shoulder. ‘Give yourself a few minutes, yeah? Just rest quiet while I go and get the rest of this off… calm yourself down, do some deep breathing or something.’ It’s cold in the bathroom and he doesn’t linger, just cleans off the stickiest parts of him with a flannel, grins at his nude reflection and flits silently back to the welcome warmth of his room. Dennis is sitting on the side of the bed, staring into space, solemnly doing deep breathing and presumably rethinking yet more of his basic principles. Naboo puts a hand on his shoulder. ‘You all right?’ ‘Er, yes, I think so.’ Dennis focuses on him and smiles. ‘Yes, yes, I’m fine. Or I will be, when I’ve…’ He gets to his feet, a little unsteadily, and heads for the door. ‘I’ll keep the bed warm for you.’ Naboo turns the fire off and burrows under the covers. Oh, so good to be warm, inside and out. He couldn’t possibly have expected tonight to have turned out quite like this. It could have been weird, it should have been weird, Dennis wanting to take him to bed after all this time, but somehow it doesn’t feel weird at all, it just feels… nice. He wonders with a sudden pang whether Saboo and Methuselah are tucked up together too; whether they’re talking about him, or about Dennis. Probably not – probably not talking at all. Not if their passionate embrace on the doorstep is anything to go by. But he doesn’t want to think about that. Change the subject, see whether anything can be done to help Dennis save his marriage. Tap into all that counselling bullshit that Howard used to lap up by the bucketload – and pay good money for, too – back at the zoo. What is it that’s gone wrong? And why is Dennis taking so long in the bathroom?

…….

‘Howard?’ Vince whispers into the darkness. ‘Howard.’ ‘Howard, Howard, Howard…’ Sod it. Vince gives up trying to be gentle about waking his sleeping partner, sits up, and clicks the bedside light on. ‘What the…?’ Howard reaches for him, trying to pull him back down into their warm cocoon of duvets. ‘I can’t get back to sleep.’ ‘I was asleep,’ the big man complains. ‘I was too. But then I wasn’t. And I’m still not.’ Howard sighs resignedly. ‘Why not?’ ‘Well, I had this really weird dream about havin’ ants inside my mirrorball suit an’ they were tryin’ to build a nest … an’ I woke up all itchy.’ Vince scratches and fidgets and peers at himself. ‘No wonder, look, I’ve got all glitter stuck in my bellybutton. Must’ve come off my costume.’ He reaches for a mascara brush and starts trying to extract the scratchy little bits. ‘Oi, stop laughing, tisn’t funny.’ Howard chuckles. ‘Sometimes you have to suffer to be beautiful, little man.’ ‘An’ was I?’ Vince smiles to himself; he saw the expression on Howard’s face when he emerged in his skimpy angel outfit, complete with silver boots and glittery wings and halo. ‘You know you were. You are.’ Howard’s tiny eyes peer up adoringly at Vince over the edge of the duvet. Vince smiles to himself again. Being Howard’s lover is genius. He still annoys Howard a lot, probably as much as he ever did, but these days Howard finds it very hard to stay annoyed for long. ‘I tried to go back to sleep an’ not wake you up,’ he says earnestly, ‘but I could hear ’em doin’ it next door an’… I felt a bit left out of the action, if you know what I mean.’ ‘I have no idea at all what you mean. Hear whom, doing what?’ ‘Naboo and Dennis, gettin’ it on.’ Howard’s face screws up in disgust. ‘Naboo and Dennis? No. No way. You’ve gone wrong, Vince. You must have imagined it.’ ‘Did not.’ Vince is indignant. ‘I heard Dennis’s voice on the landing. An’ I know muffled sex noises when I hear them, Howard. Someone was makin’ sounds just like you do when I’m givin’ you a mind-blowing orgasm an’ you’re tryin’ to keep quiet.’ ‘Vince.’ Howard rolls his eyes. ‘Just because you are having constant sex doesn’t mean everyone else has to be.’ ‘I’m not having constant sex,’ Vince protests. ‘Otherwise, I’d be having sex right now, an’ I’m not. Although I could be…’ He bats his eyelashes provocatively. ‘It’s three in the morning.’ Howard is trying to pretend the eyelash-batting isn’t having an effect, but Vince knows it is, just from the way Howard’s eyes are crinkling at the corners. ‘So? Anytime is sexytime, an’ it’ll help you get back to sleep again.’ Vince trails the mascara brush up the middle of his chest; traces a tickly path around his nipples, and watches the blush spreading over Howard’s cheeks. The door to the next room creaks; Dennis’s heavy tread goes down the hall to the bathroom. Vince puts the brush back on the table. ‘An’ I don’t have glitter anywhere any more, although you might want to check…’ Howard is tempted, he can tell. Vince leans over and whispers in his ear. ‘There were… a few places I couldn’t reach…’ Just as he hoped, the temptation proves irresistible. Howard pulls him down into a fierce embrace and starts kissing him as though it’s been years since they last snogged, not just a couple of hours. And when he lets go of Vince’s mouth, leaving his lips all puffy and tingling from the soft scratchiness of Howard’s moustache, Howard keeps on kissing him, everywhere, pretending to look in all sorts of crevices for traces of glitter. Vince giggles and squirms as Howard works his way down under the duvet and kisses all round the base of Vince’s now rock-hard erection. ‘Nope, no glitter there,’ Howard mumbles, ‘but let’s see about down here, shall we…’ and that gorgeous almost-prickly sensation carries on round Vince’s balls, and behind them, and finally traces round the rim of his hole, by which time Vince has stopped giggling and is breathlessly pleading instead. ‘What, you think you’ve got glitter up there?’ Howard slides a wet finger inside, and feels around. ‘Well, if you have, I don’t want to know how it got there. No, sir.’ ‘Haven’t – got glitter – ’ Vince pants, ‘want – want you in there, Howard.’ ‘What, again?’ Another finger slides in beside the first, gently stretching him. ‘Aren’t you sore?’ ‘Course not.’ A little achy, maybe, but Howard’s always so careful... ‘An’ I know you want to. You – you said you couldn’t get enough of me.’ ‘I can’t.’ Howard has three fingers inside Vince now, and is smiling at him in a way that makes Vince’s insides melt. ‘It still amazes me that I can have any of you, after spending all those years thinking you wouldn’t be interested. And tonight – ’ ‘Last night, now.’ ‘I don’t care what night it is. Was. You just looked so… so sexy as an angel, and you’d gone to all that trouble, and it was all for me.’ Howard leans down for another kiss. ‘So if you want another Northern bumming, who am I to deny you? Even at half-past three in the morning.’ ‘Awww, Howard.’ Vince kisses him back with enthusiasm. ‘I’m glad you liked my outfit. Took me ages to make it, with the wings and the glitter and all.’ ‘I did like it. I liked it a lot. It made me want to… do things. But there were too many other people…’ Vince grins, recalling how Howard’s eyes had followed him around the room. ‘So you just ogled my pumpkin arse and thought about doing things. And when everyone had gone, you took me to bed and did quite a lot of them.’ ‘Yes, but not this… or this…’ ‘Howard, please…’ Vince arches his back as Howard’s fingers find his sweet spot. ‘All right, my impatient angel.’ Howard withdraws his hand, and reaches for the lube on the table. ‘One Northern bumming, coming right up.’ He’s really getting quite good at this, considering they’ve only been having proper sex for a few weeks. Vince had expected it to take years, after all that don’t-touch-me stuff that Howard had had going on, but once across the physical boundary (helped considerably by one of Naboo’s more potent baking experiments) the big man had proved as eager as Vince himself. Possibly more so, if that were possible, which at the moment it surely isn’t. ‘C’m’on Howard, you must be ready by now.’ ‘Can’t rush these things.’ Howard puts the lid carefully back on the tube and puts it back on the table. Vince pouts. ‘Can too.’ ‘Oh, really?’ And Howard lifts Vince’s knees up and back in one swift movement, and slides his perfectly lubricated cock into Vince’s equally perfectly lubricated arse without even pausing to draw breath. ‘Oh yes, look, you were right.’ Howard’s not the only one who can’t get enough of this. The first time was good – if short – and every time since has given Vince exactly the same feeling of breathless amazement, except now it usually lasts for considerably longer and Howard doesn’t keep stopping every ten seconds to ask Vince whether he’s all right. Vince settles into a nice steady pace, matching Howard thrust for thrust, stroking Howard’s chest and brushing a thumb over Howard’s hard nipples every now and then, because he knows Howard really likes that. Howard leans down for another scorching kiss, and Vince wriggles a hand in between their sweaty bodies, so that he can touch himself. ‘I love you,’ Vince says, looking into Howard’s eyes, because he knows Howard really likes that, too, now that eye contact doesn’t make him uncomfortable any more. ‘I love you too, little man.’ Howard must be close to coming, to be talking about love; he still has trouble with that particular four-letter word even though Vince has been saying it lots lately, partly because Naboo told him it might help de-sensitise Howard to it but mostly because he means it. Vince tilts his hips, to take Howard in just that bit deeper, and Howard’s cock finds Vince’s prostate and suddenly Vince is coming all over the place and he can feel that Howard is coming too, and it’s just the best feeling in the world. ‘Oh. Oh, Vince…’ Howard is flushed and tousled and gasping for breath but he’s still very careful as he disentangles himself from Vince and lies down beside him. Vince strokes his hair and pulls the duvet up over his shoulders, then reaches for the tissues to clean them both up. ‘Thanks.’ Howard yawns luxuriously, and nuzzles into Vince’s neck. ‘That was absolutely –’ ‘Shush a minute.’ ‘Why?’ ‘Listen.’ There are noises in the next room. Unmistakable noises of rhythmically creaking bedsprings and someone going ‘Oh.’ ‘Still think it sounds like you,’ Vince giggles. ‘I’m sure’ – Howard yawns again – ‘there is a perfectly innocent explanation.’ ‘Oh yeah? Let’s hear it, then… Howard?’ But the big man is already snoring quietly. Vince lies wakeful for a while, wondering whether Dennis and Naboo are having a nice time and how that is even possible since Naboo doesn’t have bits, although Vince is sure Naboo isn’t a girl. He hugs Howard a bit tighter and is glad both of them are blokes. He couldn’t imagine not having his bits and he can’t imagine Howard as a girl either, although he’d probably still fancy him if he was… There is a sharp cry from the next room, then a murmur of voices, then silence. Naboo and Dennis. Dennis and Naboo. Who would have thought it? Vince had been watching Naboo at the party – a bit concerned that their landlord didn’t seem to be entirely in party mood – and he’d have sworn he only had eyes for Saboo. Mind you, that red jumpsuit was complete genius and a very snug fit, and Naboo wasn’t the only one eyeing it up… and then Saboo went off with Dennis’s wife, very dangerous given the Head Shaman’s track record… maybe Naboo is only sleeping with Dennis to try to persuade him not to cut Saboo’s head off? How is that ever going to work? And what if anything will happen if or when Saboo comes back? Vince yawns wearily and settles his head on Howard’s shoulder. It’s been quite a Christmas. And it’s not over yet.

…….

Naboo is just about to get out of bed and go and see whether Dennis has fallen asleep in the bath, when he hears the door open and shut and the key turning in the lock. Then a very chilly Head Shaman is clambering in beside him, and Naboo stops thinking and just concentrates on warming him up again. Over the sound of Dennis’s teeth chattering, Naboo can hear faint giggling from the other side of the wall. So those two are at it again… Dennis rolls onto his side, his breath tickling Naboo’s ear. ‘Naboo?’ ‘Mmm?’ ‘I’ve… well, I’ve washed and everything, and I thought perhaps…’ Blimey, he’s hard again already. ‘You want more?’ ‘Only if you… You see, I asked, and she said no, and ever since I’ve wondered whether I should have persisted or whether it’s something a man can do without… I need to know, Naboo, and I don’t know anyone else I can ask.’ ‘Ask what?’ Naboo is beginning to suspect that communication issues may be at the heart of the Head Shaman’s marital problems. ‘Well, I’m not certain of the correct terminology, but would you…’ Dennis buries his hot face in Naboo’s shoulder. ‘With your mouth,’ he whispers. ‘You’d like me to blow you?’ ‘Yes.’ At last, a straight answer to a straight question. This feels like progress. And the idea of it is already turning Naboo on, more than he’d have expected it would. ‘Hasn’t anyone ever…?’ ‘Don’t laugh, but no. Nobody ever has. My wife refused point-blank, the one time I asked, and she won’t let me, umm, reciprocate either. She never lets me… There’s so much I want to give her, so much she needs, but I can’t find the way to… I can see, you see. I can see into the heart of her, but she hates me for it.’ ‘I don’t hate you for it.’ Naboo strokes the back of Dennis’s head, tracing the lines of his shamanic tattoos. ‘An’ maybe she doesn’t either, maybe she just finds it, I dunno, a bit scary or somethin’? Anyway, listen, we can talk about that later, right now we’ve got some important research to do.’ He rolls Dennis onto his back; leans over and kisses his nipples, nibbling and teasing until they’re standing stiff and proud and Dennis is making funny little noises again. Then he takes his time over kissing his way all down the middle of Dennis’s stomach, in the direction his arrow-shaped blue markings are pointing, into his very clean groin, and then up his shaft… Dennis groans. ‘You OK there?’ ‘I’m fine. Please, don’t stop, please…’ Naboo grins, and puts his head down again, planting tiny kisses on the soft folds of Dennis’s foreskin, drawing it back little by little until the shiny purple head is revealed in all its glory. He swipes his tongue across the smooth surface, tasting salt and sex and Dennis, and it’s all very strange but very good… and Dennis doesn’t need to know that Naboo has never gone further than this before… It’s a tight fit and it’s straining his jaw, but it’s all in there, or at least quite enough of it to be going on with. Naboo puts a hand round it so he can’t take it in too far, and choke. He doesn’t want to give Dennis any excuse to stop: that hot, hard flesh against his tongue is one of the most arousing things he’s ever felt. To judge by the sounds Dennis is making, it’s quite mutual. Naboo moves his head slowly, up and down, and licks at the ridges and folds of Dennis’s cockhead; he cups the other man’s balls with his free hand, feeling them drawing up and tightening in response. ‘Oh.’ Dennis arches his back. ‘Oh, that is… I never imagined… But you’d better stop, I’m going to –’ Naboo lifts his head briefly, just long enough to make sure his jaw’s still working and say ‘I know, an’ I don’t mind, I want you to.’ Dennis shudders and gasps as Naboo returns to his research. ‘You want me to… Oh. Oh…’ Well, they do say be careful what you wish for. One more lick, and Naboo’s mouth is flooded with thick, sweet, earthy-tasting come. It takes him by surprise, and he’s swallowed the first lot without giving it a second thought; he rolls the second mouthful around his tongue, deciding that he rather likes the taste, before swallowing that too and carefully sliding Dennis’s softening prick out of his mouth. The big man is sobbing quietly. Naboo crawls up beside him, and holds him tight. ‘What’s wrong?’ ‘She - she made me feel dirty for asking,’ Dennis chokes. ‘She said it was disgusting – that I was disgusting…’ ‘She’s wrong there. Both times.’ ‘But doesn’t it taste –’ ‘No, it doesn’t, it just tastes of… well, you. Like this.’ Naboo kisses him, very gently. Dennis resists at first, then gives in and opens his mouth, and they kiss until it all tastes the same, and Dennis’s tears have ceased. Naboo lies back on Dennis’s shoulder and lets Dennis stroke his hair in a soothing rhythm. A shaman could fall asleep like this… ‘Naboo?’ ‘Mmm?’ ‘What do you taste of?’ Unexpected, this is. Naboo props himself on an elbow and grins. ‘You really wanna know? Here.’ He runs a finger through the wetness in his groin, and brings his hand up to Dennis’s lips. Dennis licks cautiously, then opens his mouth and takes Naboo’s finger in, caressing it with his tongue, sucking at it as though it were a cock, not just a finger. So that’s what it feels like… Naboo moans and rocks his hips, and Dennis slides the finger out and kisses Naboo’s mouth, tasting of both of them. Then he’s kissing Naboo’s throat, and his collarbone, and his aching nipples, and his navel, and right down over his un-male mound and between his thighs, Naboo unfurling like a flower in sunshine, opening and softening as Dennis licks and strokes and looks. ‘Could we…?’ Dennis asks softly. ‘I don’t want to hurt you, but I’d really like…’ The D-Man certainly has stamina. His wife doesn’t know what a lucky woman she is. Or perhaps she reckons you can have too much of a good thing… Naboo, on the other hand, will take as much of a good thing as he can get. ‘I’d like, too. If you can get three fingers in then yeah, it’ll be fine.’ A wet fingertip pushes cautiously inside him, and Naboo has to concentrate very hard on thoughts of Tony Harrison in order not to come right then and there. The second finger finds his major sweet spot, making him gasp and wriggle. ‘Does that hurt?’ ‘Do I look like that hurts?’ Dennis stills his movements and looks Naboo very solemnly in the face. ‘No, actually, you don’t. You look like… as though that was very nice indeed and you wish me to continue.’ ‘Spot-on, it was an’ I do. Please…’ By the time Dennis has worked a third finger in beside the other two, Naboo is dripping wet and open and so turned on he can hardly stay still. ‘Are you…?’ Dennis leans over and kisses him. ‘Ready for you? You bet. Here, stick a pillow under my arse, it’ll make it easier for you.’ ‘Do we require, um, lubrication?’ ‘Have you felt what’s goin’ on down there? If I get any more lubricated I’ll float away.’ Dennis smiles, slicks himself with his wet hand, then kneels between Naboo’s parted legs and works his cock carefully inside. It’s a tight fit, but it does fit, and as they start to move together Naboo realises that something has changed. Dennis is no longer clumsy with need but confident, relaxed, in control. The D-Man doing what the D-Man does best: giving. He kisses him and their eyes meet; Dennis is looking right into Naboo’s soul. The milky-blue of Dennis’s eyes clears and darkens, and suddenly Naboo is looking right into Dennis too. Oh, and he is loving this, just loving it. Being able to give Naboo such a good time and at the same time just enjoy himself. This is what he wants for him and his Methuselah. And now he has hope that it might somehow be possible. A fragile, trembling hope… Naboo has to close his eyes, or he’ll start crying again. ‘It’s all right. I just wanted you to see…’ Dennis strokes Naboo and soothes him, then starts thrusting into him in a slow rhythm, touching all three of his sweet spots in turn as that big hard full-male prick slides smoothly in and out. He takes Naboo right to the edge, to the point where the pleasure becomes almost painful in its intensity and Naboo is whimpering helplessly. Then he leans down, his moustache brushing Naboo’s ear, and whispers, ‘Come for me.’ With a sharp cry, Naboo lets go, his climax surging through him and washing away years and years of pent-up frustration in a flood of come and sweat and tears. He’s adrift, and would be lost if Dennis’s big hands weren’t holding him; he clings to the other man for dear life until it’s over and he’s washed up and sobbing and weak, but so very, very happy… ‘You were right,’ Dennis says, as he cleans Naboo up with the remainder of the box of tissues. ‘It does make one afraid, letting someone else see one’s innermost thoughts. It requires a high degree of trust, and that’s not easy.’ ‘’S good though, yeah?’ Naboo smiles at him. ‘Yes. Yes, it was. But then I’ve known you for a long time.’ Dennis sighs. ‘Whereas my wife…’ ‘If it can be like that with me, it can be like that with her too.’ ‘I hope it can, but I can’t see how.’ Dennis shakes his head. ‘Don’t give up on that hope. There has to be a way.’ Naboo yawns, and stretches out under the covers. ‘I need to sleep on it, but I’m sure I can come up with something. We can talk it through in the morning.’ ‘Naboo, I –’ ‘Still think we’re a bit rubbish?’ Dennis laughs, and hugs him. ‘So what if we are, we had a good time, didn’t we?’ ‘We certainly did, Big D,’ Naboo murmurs, snuggling closer. ‘And I’m not giving up hope.’ Dennis reaches up to click the light off. ‘It’s still Christmas. And we’ve still got the magic.’

…….

As always, Naboo’s shaman-senses wake him just before his radio alarm clock clicks on; only this morning he reaches out and clicks it off, instead of lying there listening to Xooberon FM. Beside him, Dennis is still peacefully asleep, sprawled on his side with one arm tucked around Naboo’s ribcage. Naboo has the feeling his boss needs all the sleep he can get. Although… Most of Dennis may be peacefully asleep, but one particular part of him isn’t, it’s wide awake and nudging into Naboo’s hip. Naboo shifts his position a little, to give it more room. ‘One more for the road?’ Dennis murmurs sleepily. ‘And good morning to you, too, morning glory.’ Naboo wraps a hand round Dennis’s cock. ‘Sleep well?’ ‘I – Oh, that’s good, yes, I did, thank you. You?’ ‘Like a log.’ Naboo tightens his grip; strokes Dennis’s arse with his other hand. ‘Didn’t even dream.’ ‘Nor did I… Naboo, what are you doing?’ ‘Goin’ a bit too far?’ Naboo takes his hand away from Dennis’s ring. ‘Sorry. Should’ve asked first.’ ‘That’s, um, a bit personal. I mean, I know you and I… we… last night… and I’ve thought long and hard about my basic principles, many times. But I don’t –’ ‘You don’t need to explain.’ Naboo leans over and kisses Dennis into stammering silence. ‘But I can do this, yeah?’ And he strokes the furred ridge behind Dennis’s balls, pressing in deep, knowing there’s a sweet spot in there somewhere. ‘Yes, that’s… that’s fine. That’s… Oh.’ Yup, there’s a sweet spot in there alright: right there. There’s a knock on the door. ‘Bugger off, Bollo,’ Naboo calls, ‘shaman business. Go an’ put the kettle on.’ ‘OK boss.’ The gorilla’s shuffling footsteps go away down the corridor, and there is a clink of crockery from the kitchen. Naboo takes Dennis’s prick into his mouth until it’s slick and gleaming; reaches a hand down to prepare himself, which doesn’t take long since he’s still pretty relaxed after last night. Then he kneels astride Dennis’s hips, and smiles down at him. ‘You wanna top from the bottom?’ ‘I… how did you know?’ Naboo shrugs. ‘My shaman-senses were tinglin’.’ ‘Your shaman-senses, Naboo, are particularly highly attuned. That’s one of the reasons I appointed you to the Board… Oh.’ ‘Fuck now, talk later, yeah?’ Naboo seats himself comfortably and tightens up a few key muscles, feeling Dennis twitch inside him in response. ‘That sounds like a good plan to me,’ Dennis says gravely. ‘I may not come this time – batteries take a while to recharge, y’know? But that don’t mean I won’t enjoy it.’ ‘I sincerely hope, Naboo, that you will. Enjoy it, I mean. This might be the last time that we…’ ‘Shush. Think of it as the first time that we… do it this way up.’ Naboo moves his hips gently, carefully, following every hint Dennis’s body is giving him. The Head Shamanic Markers are standing out dark and clear on Dennis’s pale skin; Naboo traces the blue curves with his fingertips. ‘I remember when they put those in, you asked me to stand witness at your markin’ ceremony an’ everyone thought it was a condition of my gettin’ on the Board…’ ‘Everyone except me. I knew you would do it anyway. I didn’t want anyone else to see me like that.’ ‘Like what? You barely flinched. I was the one who almost passed out. But I couldn’t look away. An’ they’re beautiful. Thought that at the time. Still do.’ ‘Thank you.’ Dennis arches his body into Naboo’s touch. ‘Sensitive too, eh?’ Naboo is smiling now, and Dennis smiles back, and they move together, easy and gentle and affectionate, with no more need of words. And to Naboo’s delighted surprise, he does come, right when Dennis does, and although it’s a low-key affair compared with the epic dam-burst of the night before, it’s still a magic moment with the two of them perfectly in tune, and Naboo never wants it to end. Afterwards they lie quiet for a long time, Naboo’s head pillowed on Dennis’s shoulder. ‘That was nice,’ Naboo murmurs, when the silence has gone on long enough and it’s time to start talking; start trying to help. ‘That was… something else my wife will never do,’ Dennis admits sadly. ‘Even though I know she’d… reach a climax more easily that way.’ ‘Ever thought that perhaps that’s why not? Maybe she’s scared to let go an’ show weakness. Or she’s holding out on you to make you feel inadequate, prove she’s got the power…’ ‘Or maybe both.’ Dennis sighs heavily. ‘You wanna talk about it?’ ‘Well… I suppose it might help. Didn’t you say you used to do counselling as a sideline, when you worked at the zoo?’ ‘Yeah, but it was mostly for that ballbag Howard, an’ he ain’t exactly complicated. I’ll do my best for you though.’ ‘I don’t know where to start.’ ‘Start at the beginnin’, then. When you got married. What was it drew you two together?’ Dennis thinks about this for a long time. ‘She’s like you.’ ‘In what way is an extreme sports calendar model even slightly like me?’ Naboo’s all at sea here, he hadn’t expected that particular answer, he was expecting a candid admission that Dennis had simply fallen for a fit body and a nice pair of tits. The Head Shaman’s brow is creased in thought. ‘Self-sufficient, or pretending to be, but a loner, in need of support.’ Another long silence. ‘And, of course, she does have a fabulous body and the nicest pair of tits I’ve ever laid eyes on.’ Naboo nods. ‘She’s a stunner alright.’ ‘With a core of fire, but so fragile… she won’t admit it… she wants the world to see her as a successful career woman in her own right, and I can’t blame her for that –’ ‘You jealous of her career?’ ‘No, I’m very proud of it. But she doesn’t believe me when I say that. And the other Board members seem to think I just wanted her as a trophy wife, to prove my virility.’ ‘When in fact the reverse was true.’ ‘I’m afraid so. And I didn’t see it at the time. I was… flattered by her attentions…’ ‘And didn’t see that she wanted you as a trophy man, one of the most powerful blokes in the galaxy, to underline her successful status.’ ‘She really did want me. Physically, I mean.’ Dennis sighs. ‘At least, she used to like me being masterful and waving a big sword around, but the novelty’s worn off now. Besides, I couldn’t keep doing that all the time. The body-count was unacceptably high – it was causing the Board all sorts of public relations issues.’ ‘I fink…’ Naboo takes his time finding the right words; he could very well be wrong here. ‘I fink she made the mistake lots of people make about you – she didn’t see that you do actually have real power as well as the symbolic position. She thought they’d just put you in charge of the Board because you were a pushover, and that you’d be a pushover as a husband as well. An’ when she found out you could see right inside her head…’ ‘She hated it. I told you.’ Dennis heaves a harsh, painful breath. ‘So she’s pushed you away because she’s scared of being close to you.’ ‘Of being close to anyone, I think.’ Well, that’s something Naboo can sympathise with. He hugs Dennis a bit closer. ‘So… Is all the girl-chasing just due to frustration? Proving that you still got it even though your wife refused to recognise it?’ ‘I suppose so,’ Dennis admits reluctantly. ‘It’s more of a habit, one I’ve never broken. I suppose I was being selfish – I never really thought it would do any harm. She goes to launch parties and photo shoots with all manner of young and handsome men…’ ‘Revenge?’ Naboo asks quietly. ‘I hadn’t thought of it in that light, but yes, I suppose so. And last night was more of the same.’ ‘You mean Saboo?’ Naboo stammers a little over the name. ‘Yes. And I assure you, Naboo, I won’t go after Saboo with a sword, whatever I find has transpired when I get home. You have my word, I will leave him in one piece. The Board of Shamen needs him. And you need him.’ ‘Yes, well…’ Naboo tries hard not to think about just how true that is. ‘What about what you need, though?’ ‘That’s not important.’ ‘Bollocks.' Naboo props himself on an elbow, and looks hard at Dennis. 'It’s the most important thing of all, and the whole reason you’re in this mess. Listen, you love her an’ you want her back, right?... Right?... Dennis, look at me.’ It takes a while for Dennis to turn his head and meet Naboo’s gaze. ‘I do love her. As well as… want her.’ ‘An’ you thought because she’s into extreme sport that she’d be into extreme sex as well, and she isn’t.’ Dennis shakes his head sadly. ‘She’s afraid of… anything even slightly unconventional.’ ‘But she wants you, yeah?’ ‘Yes. I can see that she wants to have sex with me, very much. But then she shies away from it. I have never really comprehended the workings of the female mind. I don’t understand.’ Naboo kisses him chastely on the cheek. ‘I think I do. It scares her. Like you said last night. To have really good sex with someone you really have to trust them – it’s like takin’ your skin off and letting someone else see your insides – an’ she don’t trust you.’ ‘I’ve tried…’ ‘Yeah, but think about it. You spend a lot of time away on shaman business an’ she knows fine well that that usually means you’re getting’ wasted with us lot. You run after pretty girls at parties whether she’s there or not. She don’t feel secure. She can’t see inside you. If you want her to know what’s really goin’ on in there, you’re gonna have to let her in.’ ‘I’m not sure I can.’ ‘Course you can. You did it for me, you can do it for her too. You have to do the hard thing, big man, an’ tell her who you really are. Show her. And then trust her to make the right decision.’ Dennis puts both arms round Naboo and holds him tight. ‘Naboo, you’re right. My wife and I need to start again from a position of honesty, and you’ve shown me that that may in fact be possible.’ ‘As well as releasin’ the tension, eh?’ Naboo nuzzles into Dennis’s neck. ‘That too. It should render the discussions… less complicated. And it was everything I ever hoped it would be. I – I don’t know how to thank you.’ ‘No need. Listen, Big D, you’ve been the best friend and nearest thing to a parent I ever had.’ Naboo can feel himself welling up now. ‘If... if I could love you I would, you’ve always stuck by me and bent the rules for me, to save me…’ ‘I think we saved each other, actually.’ Dennis pats him awkwardly on the back. ‘Come on, now, there’s no need for tears, didn’t you say we should look on this as the first time and not the last?’ Naboo sniffs, and wipes his eyes on the duvet. ‘Yeah. An’ it was a fuckin’ good first time an’ all.’ ‘Magic,’ Dennis says firmly. ‘It was magic. And it always will be.’ There’s a knock on the door. Naboo sighs. ‘Bugger off Bollo, I told you –’ A loud and derisive gorilla-snort makes the doorhandle rattle. ‘Yeah, yeah. Shaman business, Bollo’s hairy arse. Bollo boil kettle six times. You two coming out for breakfast or should Bollo just make lunch now?’

…….

‘Morning.’Vince looks round from stirring a big pan of porridge on the stove, and grins at Naboo and Dennis as they come through the kitchen doorway. ‘Good morning,’ Dennis says politely. ‘All of an hour left of it,’ Bollo grunts, ‘Bollo not know why he bother.’ He thumps the teapot down in the middle of the table. Howard is hovering nervously at Vince’s elbow. ‘You need to turn the heat down, Vince, it’s going to burn…’ ‘Give over, ya big fuss-pot, it’s fine.’ Vince’s grin grows wider. ‘Sleep well?’ ‘Um, yes, yes, thank you.’ Dennis seats himself gingerly on one of the kitchen chairs and pours himself some tea. Vince giggles. ‘Yeah, it sounded like it.’ ‘Vince,’ Howard hisses, ‘I don’t think that’s –’ ‘Ah.’ Dennis frowns as he adds milk to his mug. ‘You… you heard, then.’ ‘Course we did.’ Vince hands the porridge pan over to Howard to dish out, and plonks himself down at the table next to Naboo. ‘But it’s OK, we didn’t mind. Sounded like you were having fun… ’Spect you heard us, too.’ Naboo puts his head in his hands and thinks very hard about memory-wiping potions. Vince pats him on the back. ‘Aww, Naboolio, don’t worry, your secret’s safe with us. Isn’t it, Howard?’ 'Er...' Howard is blushing. ‘Secrets not possible in house with walls this thin,’ Bollo mutters. ‘I see no particular reason to conceal the truth on this occasion,’ Dennis is saying earnestly. ‘After all, we are all friends here.’ Naboo shoots Bollo a warning glance before the gorilla can say anything else. ‘Have some porridge, Dennis.’ Howard brandishes the pan. ‘And, um, maybe change the subject?’ ‘Before Naboo sinks through the floor, you mean?’ Vince is laughing, but his touch on Naboo’s shoulder is kind. ‘And make another mess for Bollo to clean up.’ Bollo slops milk into his bowl. ‘Mmm, Vince, this good, you getting better.’ ‘Cheers.’ Vince leans over for the tin of golden syrup. ‘Here you go, Naboo, sugar rush, just what you need.’ He ladles a generous helping onto Naboo’s breakfast, and a still more generous one onto his own. ‘You’ll get fat,’ Howard warns. Vince sticks his tongue out at him. ‘What, with all the exercise I’ve been gettin’ lately?’ ‘Thought we was changin’ the subject.’ Naboo takes a spoonful of syrupy porridge; lets the sugar start to do its work. ‘You guys hittin’ the sales later?’ ‘Maybe,’ Howard says. ‘There’s a late-nighter on at Top Shop and I know Vince had his eye on a few things...’ Vince and Howard – well, mostly Vince – start chattering on about clothes and glitter and shades of brown; Naboo catches Dennis’s eye and says quietly, ‘You OK?’ ‘I’m fine.’ The big man is looking thoughtful. ‘Just… getting my ideas in order. It’s going to be a challenging day. But at least I started it with a good… um… breakfast.’ And then they are both laughing quietly, while Bollo rolls his eyes and licks the last of the golden syrup off his fur. ……. ‘Well, there you go. Bit dodgy, but it should get you home.’ Naboo unrolls his magic carpet onto the pavement outside the shop, and pokes at its threadbare fringe with the toe of one curly trainer. ‘Won’t be needin’ it for a few days, just send it back whenever, it’s got a homin’ device that usually works…’ He looks up and meets Dennis’s eyes. ‘Crunch time.’ Dennis’s voice is quiet, but resolute. ‘Yeah, I know.’ Naboo reaches up to touch Dennis’s cheek. ‘Best of luck.’ ‘Thanks. Er, how about… um… one more for the road?’ It’s a long, sweet kiss, and so hard to break it off, but finally Naboo pulls away and slaps Dennis on the back. ‘Go get ’er, big man.’ ‘I will.’ Dennis smiles down at him. ‘Thank you for everything, Naboo. And don’t forget…’ He steps aboard the carpet. ‘Forget what?’ ‘It’s still Christmas,’ Dennis says, and he looks as though he was going to say more, but he has to sit down rather suddenly as the carpet takes off with its usual jerk. Naboo watches it rise unsteadily into the grey sky; the steering takes a bit of getting used to. Should get it fixed really. The street feels very empty when the carpet finally disappears over the rooftops. And the cold air is making Naboo’s eyes water a little. Heavy footsteps come down the stairs behind him, and he’s pulled into a warm and hairy hug. ‘Shaman business, eh? Good thing you lock door, Bollo didn’t need to see. But Bollo glad you had nice time.’ The gorilla looks long into Naboo’s face, and ruffles his hair. ‘Come on inside. Bollo go and put kettle on again. And light up bong. It nearly time for Boxing Day special of Peacock Dreams.’ As he climbs back up the stairs, Naboo makes a mental note: never to even think about upgrading his familiar ever again. It’s nice and warm in the lounge; the TV is on, and the two humans are already comfortably settled on the sofa. Which is no longer an island in a sea of rubbish and empties. Someone – all three of them, to judge by the smug smiles on their faces as they see that Naboo has noticed – has done a hasty but thorough job of shovelling the crap into binbags and piling the dirty plates and glasses in the sink. And someone has even pushed the Hoover across the carpet – almost certainly Howard, since Bollo always says hoovering sets off his asthma, and Vince has no idea how to turn the thing on. ‘Cheers guys, ’preciate this,’ Naboo mumbles. Vince exchanges a meaningful glance with Howard, and puts an arm round Naboo as he sinks into the cushions beside them. Naboo makes another mental note: to raise his employees’ wages and stop calling them ballbags so often. The hash pipe is lit, the familiar theme music is tinkling, Bollo has shoved them all up the sofa so he can squeeze in at the end as well, and they’re all just drifting off nicely when the doorbell rings. ‘Bollo, go an’ see who it is, would ya?’ Naboo says sleepily. The gorilla grumbles his way to the window, and peers down into the street. He turns back to them, grinning. ‘Well? Who is it?’ Vince asks. ‘Anybody we know?’ Naboo takes another drag of the pipe. ‘Go an’ let ’em in, Bollo, we’re just gettin’ to the good part.’ Bollo grins still more. ‘Bollo not going. Naboo should answer it.’ ‘Why me?’ ‘Trust Bollo.’ And Naboo finds himself being hauled bodily out of his cosy seat and propelled to the door. ‘I gotta good feeling about this,’ Bollo stage-whispers as he shoves Naboo out onto the landing. Naboo doesn’t share the good feeling. It’s cold and draughty on the stairs, and he really doesn’t want to talk to anybody at the moment. He really should have got that entryphone fixed, he thinks, as he opens the door… Oh. Fuckin’ hell, it’s Father Christmas. ‘What –’ Naboo swallows hard, and tries again. ‘What are you doin’ ’ere?’ Santa sweeps off his pointed hat and makes an elaborate mock-bow. ‘I’ve come to make your Christmas dreams come true – actually, no, that’s a total lie, I’ve just come to bring your carpet back.’ Naboo rubs his eyes. This can’t be happening. The visitor taps one fleece-booted foot impatiently. ‘Look, this suit’s got no insulation. I’m freezing my arse off out here. Are you going to invite me in or are you just going to stand there gaping like a stranded goldfish?’ He jams the hat back onto his black curls, and stands there waiting. His silky red jumpsuit is indeed not designed for a wintry climate: it clings tightly to every line and curve of his tall body. The fur-trimmed belt knotted about his waist has slipped down, sitting low over his hips, the tasselled ends dangling down one thigh… He shivers, and takes a step closer. ‘Naboo, you plum, get a grip. Or at least get out of the bloody way.’ He actually wants to come in? No, this definitely can’t be happening. But just in case it is… Naboo opens the door a bit wider, and stands aside. ‘Um, yeah, come in, sorry, we were just chillin’, er, it’s warmer inside.’ He’s not sure whether any of what he’s just said made sense, but he’s hugely relieved when Saboo comes in anyway and dumps the rolled-up carpet in the hall. ‘There you go. One manky rug. With the Head Shaman’s compliments.’ ‘Cheers,’ Naboo says cautiously. Perhaps this is really happening. Saboo kicks the carpet closer to the wall, out of the way. ‘Dennis said you might be needing it. Thank fuck he didn’t make me fly here on it, doesn’t look airworthy to me.’ ‘Don’t knock it,’ Naboo says indignantly, ‘it works fine.’ ‘Does it now.’ Saboo’s lip curls. ‘Well, I suppose I’ll have to take your word for it.’ Naboo searches desperately for a safer topic of conversation: one that won’t involve Saboo telling him he’s rubbish and that he’s never liked him. ‘If you didn’t fly, how did you get here?’ ‘By amulet. Dennis lent me one from his personal collection.’ ‘Bit unconventional.’ Amulets are powerful artefacts; shamanic law decrees that they should only be used in emergencies. ‘Since when has that ever stopped the D-Man? I think he just wanted me out of the way so he could get it on with his wife.’ ‘They’re back on speaking terms?’ Naboo hopes fervently that Dennis has succeeded in his mission. Saboo rolls his eyes. ‘I don’t know and I don’t care. She was still asleep on the sofa when I left. But to judge by the way he was looking at her... Anyway he couldn’t wait to get me out of the house, said you’d be needing help to sort things out after the party, and burbled some nonsense about it still being Christmas.’ A small flicker of hope lights itself up in Naboo’s mind, like a single fairy light on a tree. ‘It is still Christmas.’ ‘Like I give a toss. Christmas is over-rated, if you ask me.’ ‘Didn’t you get what you wanted, then?’ Saboo aims another vicious kick at the rolled-up carpet. ‘No, I fucking well didn’t. Blasted woman. I spent half the night playing the therapist, having my ear bent about how impossible her husband is. And now apparently I have to be Dennis’s errand boy and your home help. Still in this embarrassingly ridiculous costume. Well, the least you can do is make me a cup of tea now I’m here…’ He stomps up the stairs, still complaining. ‘Honestly, Naboo, you are completely hopeless. Dennis was right about that, at least. Look at this place, it’s a tip.’ Naboo can’t even defend himself; he’s reduced to speechlessness at the sight of Saboo’s scarlet-satin-clad arse going up the stairs in front of him. ‘And as for that…’ Saboo isn’t finished yet. But the flicker of hope in Naboo’s mind is suddenly strong enough to illuminate several Christmas trees at once. Including the stars on top. Because Saboo has stopped dead on the landing, looking up at the light. ‘Oh, that takes the cake. It’s pathetic. It has to be the most rubbish bit of mistletoe I have ever seen.’ ‘Don’t knock it,’ Naboo hears himself say as he reaches the top step, ‘it works fine.’ Saboo snorts. ‘Does it now.’ He turns round and looks at Naboo with a challenge in his eyes, and a hint of laughter twitching the corner of his mouth. Naboo lifts his chin defiantly. ‘Course it does.’ That flicker of hope is now a blaze of certainty. Dennis is behind this. Dennis has never let him down yet… ‘Would you care to prove that ridiculous assertion?’ Saboo is grinning openly now; the sparkle in his eyes is more of an invitation than a challenge. Dennis, you diamond. This is really happening. It really is. And it’s still Christmas. Naboo stands on tiptoe and flings his arms round Saboo’s neck. Saboo’s mouth meets his with a hunger and sincerity that drives away all remaining doubt. ‘Why –’ Naboo gasps, coming up for air, ‘ – why didn’t you say?’ ‘Why didn’t you?’ Saboo takes Naboo’s face between his hands and gazes at him in a way that says this is all he’s ever wanted. ‘Fair point,’ Naboo concedes, and then Saboo is kissing him again, and Naboo doesn’t care if they never do anything else, because this is just perfect, and it’s turning out to be a magic Christmas and not a rubbish one after all. Saboo picks him up bodily and carries him through the lounge, to the accompaniment of wolf-whistles, cheering and applause from the others on the sofa. Naboo gives them a two-finger salute behind Saboo’s back. ‘Excuse us, gentlemen.’ Saboo can barely keep a straight face. ‘We’ll join you later. But right now Santa has a couple of late Christmas wishes to fulfil.’ He’s still laughing as he kicks the bedroom door shut.

Saboo puts Naboo down on the bedroom floor, takes a pace back and looks at him. ‘Well. What now?’ A delicious shiver runs through Naboo; he’s not used to being looked at like that. He could easily get used to it, though… ‘Erm, how about a re-run without the audience? And then we can unwrap our Christmas presents.’ ‘Sounds like a plan to me.’ Saboo puts his hands on Naboo’s shoulders, and bends to kiss him again, carefully this time, as though afraid he might break him. Naboo licks at the corner of Saboo’s mouth until his lips part; the other man lets out a small, needy whimper as Naboo starts to explore him with his tongue, tasting and caressing, letting him know just how much this means… It means everything. Everything, just to stand there and hold and be held in return, to feel Saboo’s heart hammering under the flimsy red material, to hear his own pulse loud in his ears. Saboo is shivering slightly and his body is taut with excitement; he smells of sweat and leather and a faint waft of perfume… Methuselah’s perfume. Naboo’s heart twists painfully inside him, and he pulls away. ‘Saboo…’ The name feels strange in his mouth. ‘What is it?’ So hard to say it, when it could wreck everything. But not saying it would be ten times worse. ‘There’s… before we…there’s somefink I have to tell you.’ ‘No, you don’t.’ Saboo smiles; his big hands are gentle as they stroke Naboo’s back. ‘Dennis already did. And it’s all right.’ ‘You – you don’t mind?’ Saboo shakes his head. ‘Why should I? You didn’t know I’d be coming back. Hell, I didn’t know I’d be coming back. And I can’t blame you for taking a bit of comfort when it was offered.’ Naboo buries his burning face in Saboo’s chest. ‘Wasn’t just comfort,’ he mumbles. ‘We had sex…’ ‘I know. But I wouldn’t be standing here if you hadn’t. I’d be a decapitated corpse in Dennis’s front room.’ Naboo shudders. ‘Stop it.’ Saboo pulls him close. ‘Don’t think about it, it didn’t happen. Don’t…’ But Naboo can’t stop shaking, it’s all too much, his world has been turned upside down and he hadn’t smoked nearly enough weed before that doorbell rang. ‘Sorry, ’m havin’ a panic attack…’ His voice sounds wavery and too high. Saboo takes his hand, tows him across the room and sits him down on the bed. ‘Little one.’ His voice is gentle; Naboo has never heard him speak like that to anyone. ‘I know, it’s a big change and it’s been a long time coming. But there’s no need to panic. Take a deep breath and count to ten. You’ll be fine. We’ll be fine.’ He sits beside Naboo and strokes him as though he were a scared small animal, touching him without haste, without demands, soothing away his fear. Pretty soon Naboo is completely relaxed again, his curly trainers have joined Saboo’s snowboots on the floor, and the two shamen are lying on the bed wrapped around each other, kissing deep and slow. Saboo’s big body is warm now, and he’s not troubling to conceal his arousal, not that that costume has much potential for concealing anything anyway. Naboo can’t help pressing closer and closer, until Saboo pulls away, props himself on one elbow and grins. ‘Would you like your present now?’ ‘But I’ve been bad,’ Naboo says seriously. ‘That’s not what I heard.’ Saboo puts a hand on Naboo’s cheek. ‘I heard you were very good indeed…’ That smile is infectious. And it seems that Saboo is genuinely prepared to take last night’s events in his stride. Naboo plucks up courage to untie the furry belt from around Saboo’s waist and and draw it out from under him; growing bolder, he reaches for the zip tag at Saboo’s throat. The zip comes open with a faint ripping sound. Naboo keeps on pulling gently, mesmerised by the gradual revelation of Saboo’s brown skin, his neat nipples, the curling dark hairs around his navel… ‘Hey.’ He gets to his knees to ease the red suit off over Saboo’s feet. ‘I like your giftwrapping.’ ‘I thought you might.’ Saboo stands up and turns round, slowly. Now that is the sort of package everybody should find on (or preferably in) the bed on Christmas morning. It’s a red patent leather posing pouch with a white fur trim and a very small thong, and it’s only just managing to do the job for which it was designed… Naboo stands up too, all breathless and light-headed, and reaches for the very small clip that is struggling to hold it all together. ‘Not yet.’ Saboo shakes his head. ‘I think it’s my turn to unwrap something, don’t you?’ Without waiting for a reply, he lifts Naboo’s robes off over his head, pushes his trousers down and turns him round, his gaze burning Naboo’s shaman-senses. ‘Oh, that is beautiful.’ Saboo’s voice is a hoarse whisper, and the raw longing in his words makes Naboo’s skin prickle all over. Saboo reaches for him; strokes a thumb over one taut nipple. ‘Cold in here.’ Naboo grins; the air is cold, but that’s not what’s giving him goosebumps. ‘Soon warm you up,’ he says, and reaches again for that stupidly small clip. It gives way stupidly easily, and the thong falls to the floor. The room goes very quiet. Saboo stands still, trying not to shiver, watching Naboo watching him. His heartbeats are shaking his body, his erection standing proud. And it’s an erection that anybody would be proud of, perhaps not as big as Dennis’s but strong and straight and elegantly shaped and very, very hard. ‘Can I…?’ Naboo asks dreamily, and puts out a hand. Saboo tuts impatiently. ‘That was the idea, you Christmas pudding. If I didn’t want you to, then I wouldn’t have let you take all my clothes off, would I?’ ‘S’pose not.’ Naboo moves a step closer. He can feel the warmth of Saboo’s body, hear the soft sounds of his breathing, smell the musk of him. This is the best Christmas present ever. ‘Your hand’s cold,’ Saboo complains, as Naboo reaches up to caress his throat, his chest, his lean ribcage. Naboo grins. ‘I know how to warm it up.’ He strokes down the black curls on Saboo’s belly, reaches that glorious hot hardness and wraps his cold hand around it… And Saboo is coming. There was no warning, but he’s gasping and shaking and spilling warm and wet over Naboo’s hand and over both of them; Naboo can do nothing but hold on, aroused and surprised and a bit anxious. Abruptly Saboo pulls away; turns his back. ‘That never happens.’ He sounds angry. Embarrassed. Naboo doesn’t know what to do, this isn’t how it was meant to be. ‘I don’t mind.’ He touches Saboo cautiously on the arm. ‘There’s plenty of time to get it right.’ ‘I wanted it to be perfect,’ Saboo snarls. ‘Not fucking humiliating.’ He looks down at himself, his chest heaving. Wordlessly, Naboo passes him the new box of tissues that someone – Bollo, presumably – has thoughtfully placed on the bedside table. Saboo scrubs at his damp groin, curses, and hurls the dirty tissues angrily at the bin, without looking round. No, oh no, this can’t all be going wrong already. There’s a lump in Naboo’s throat; his body aches with tension. At any moment Saboo is going to grab his clothes and leave, and this Christmas dream will be over. The magic has to be still working, it has to be… Saboo stands with his back turned for what feels like about ten years before he heaves a huge sigh and chokes out: ‘I’m sorry.’ ‘I’m not.’ Weak with relief, Naboo stands behind him; puts his arms round him. ‘You’re here, an’ I never thought you would be… an’ it was a compliment, I didn’t know you wanted me that much.’ ‘Neither did I.’ Saboo is shivering, his skin clammy. ‘Come to bed. It’s too cold to discuss it out here with no clothes on.’ Naboo takes Saboo’s hand and pulls him across the room; he doesn’t resist. Oh, and Bollo’s put clean sheets on the bed as well. Truly a familiar in a million. Naboo tucks them both in and lies quietly beside Saboo; when the shivering finally stops, he lays his hand over Saboo’s, linking their fingers together. ‘Thank you.’ Saboo’s face is still turned away. Naboo leans over and kisses him behind the ear. ‘Ready to start again, then?’ Saboo meets his eyes and smiles, a bit shyly. ‘I suppose so, if you are.’ ‘Course I am.’ Naboo grins. ‘You plum.’ ‘Oi, that’s my line.’ Saboo pins Naboo down by the shoulders and kisses him on the mouth until they’re both breathless and Saboo is hard again. ‘Well?’ Naboo looks up into Saboo’s dark eyes. ‘D’you want to…?’ Saboo looks away. ‘Actually, you know, I’m not sure, not yet.’ ‘This is sure.’ Naboo strokes a fingertip along Saboo’s rigid prick. ‘And I am too now.’ Saboo fidgets uneasily. ‘Well, yes, I know, but we haven’t… there hasn’t been time. We hardly know each other.’ ‘Bollocks, we’ve known each other for three centuries.’ There’s an ironic twist to Saboo’s mouth. ‘Yes, as professional colleagues who don’t like each other very much. Not as…’ ‘Lovers?’ Naboo goes on stroking, the hot skin satin-smooth against his fingers. Saboo half-laughs, and buries his face in Naboo’s shoulder. ‘I’m just not certain we’re ready to have full-on sex yet.’ ‘Because I was with Dennis last night?’ ‘No, that’s not it.’ Saboo rolls away, and stares at the ceiling. ‘I meant it when I said I didn’t mind. And it’s up to you how quickly you recover. If you say you’re ready, then you’re ready.’ ‘But you’re not sure that you are.’ ‘No, I’m not, Naboo, I’m not sure at all.’ Even though they’re not touching, Naboo can feel that Saboo is tense all over as he struggles to explain himself. ‘It’s not that I don’t want you. I do. I’ve never wanted anything so much in my life. But…’ ‘ ’S’alright, I promise not to laugh.’ Naboo does his best to ignore his own rising worry and disappointment, and just listen. Perhaps it’ll be something he can do something about. ‘You’d better not fucking well laugh. It’s not funny.’ Saboo hesitates, clears his throat, and plunges in. ‘Alright, I’ve only ever done it once, and that was with a woman, a long time ago, and it was an utter disaster. And… I’ve never seen a thirdsex before except in textbooks.’ ‘An’ you don’t deal with unfamiliar situations well, they make you nervous, an’ that makes you get angry an’ behave like a total ballbag. I know that from bein’ a professional colleague of yours that you didn’t like very much.’ Naboo is relieved; this is something he can do something about, and he’s going to start right now. ‘Gimme your hand.’ ‘What for?’ ‘So I can show you where to start, OK? The stuff that the textbooks don’t tell you. Thirdsex ain’t so different really, it just looks a bit unusual.’ He kisses Saboo on the cheek. ‘Don’t worry, take your time, an’ if you’ve got questions just ask ’em, I don’t mind.’ He lies down again, flat on his back, and waits for what seems an age until he feels Saboo lay a hand on his stomach. ‘Now what?’ Saboo sounds nervous; his fingers are cold. ‘Naboo, I don’t – ’ ‘Shush.’ Naboo takes hold of Saboo’s wrist and guides him further down, until his palm is cupped over the slight mound that covers Naboo’s internalised genitals. ‘So smooth,’ Saboo murmurs, moving his hand cautiously from side to side. ‘Is that… good?’ Naboo shudders and arches his back, unable to keep still. ‘What do you think?’ ‘I don’t know quite what to think. Not sure thinking has much to do with this. What happens if I… Oh.’ ‘Yeah, it’s wet. Can’t help it that you’re the sexiest thing I’ve ever seen, can I? It’s OK, keep going, there’s only one way in and you’re half way in already.’ Naboo keeps his own hand over Saboo’s, guiding and encouraging him, until Saboo’s long fingers, warm now and slippery, are inside him and pressing up against… With a sudden shrill yelp, Naboo comes on the spot, keening and whimpering and totally unable to help himself. To his surprise, Saboo keeps his hand there through the aftershocks, despite the flood of warm stickiness spreading over his wrist and between Naboo’s thighs and down onto the sheets. ‘That never happens either,’ Naboo says faintly, as Saboo withdraws his hand and looks with amazement at his wet fingers. Saboo just smiles at him, and suddenly they are both laughing, and when they stop laughing and look at each other, Naboo has an idea. ‘Got it.’ ‘Got what?’ ‘The next step.' He rolls over onto his side, facing away from Saboo. ‘Don’t turn your back on me. Please.’ ‘I’m not, don’t worry, you get the music when I’m doin’ that. No, look.’ Naboo parts his thighs, and spreads the slippery wetness over them. ‘One step short of goin’ all the way… but it’ll feel just as good.’ ‘In there?’ Saboo sounds intrigued. ‘Well, that’s a new one on me, but I’ll try anything once.’ ‘’S’nice,’ Naboo reassures him, ‘an’ I can touch you too, an’ we can stop anytime you want –’ ‘You must be joking.’ Saboo pushes carefully into the space between Naboo’s legs. ‘Why would I want to stop this?’ Naboo feels around until he’s holding Saboo’s wet, hot cockhead lightly between his fingertips, stroking and caressing as the other man thrusts against him, pressed tight against his back and his arse. He can feel Saboo’s balls down there, the slight tickle of hair, and it’s all strange and a bit uncomfortable, but it’s completely magic and Naboo can’t think of a reason he’d want to stop, either. ‘Oh.’ Saboo picks up the rhythm, his prick hardening, sliding smoothly back and forth. ‘Oh, that is just beautiful. I can’t…’ Naboo tightens his grip slightly; thrusts back against Saboo’s big warm body. ‘So it’s OK then?’ ‘Little one.’ Saboo nuzzles into the curve of Naboo’s neck. ‘It’s perfect. You’re perfect. I never… wanted… anyone… the way I… oh, Naboo…’ And then he’s coming, into Naboo’s hand and all over his front and… sorry Bollo, that’s another sheet that’ll have to go down the laundrette later. Afterwards Saboo lies limp and heaving while Naboo cleans him up. The theme tune to ‘Colobos the Crab’ comes drifting through the door: someone’s turned the volume up on the telly. Naboo smiles to himself as he wonders when that happened, and whether it was Howard or Bollo who muttered ‘we don’t need to hear this.’ Saboo stretches out on the dry side of the bed, and pulls Naboo down beside him, comfortably entwined, skin to skin. ‘I think, maybe, next time…’ ‘We can go all the way?’ Naboo kisses him chastely on the cheek. ‘Only when you’re ready for it, there’s no rush and I’m not giving you marks out of ten. An’ there’s lots of other ways we can get to know each other a bit better.’ ‘I’d say we’ve made a good start.’ Saboo pulls him just a bit nearer. ‘I’d say you were right,’ Naboo agrees sleepily. ‘Even though it was a bit rubbish?’ ‘Don’t knock it,’ Naboo says, ‘it worked fine.’ Saboo chuckles. ‘I’ll take your word for it.’ ‘Thanks…’ Naboo’s eyes are closing. He rests his head on Saboo’s shoulder and surrenders to the closeness and the warmth and the happy feeling of having everything he ever wanted. He hopes Dennis is feeling like this right now too… A touch on his cheek rouses him from a blurred dream of red leather and warm white fur. ‘What…?’ ‘Sorry to wake you,’ Saboo mutters in his ear, ‘but I need to… and I haven’t got any other clothes… You got a dressing gown or something?’ Naboo wriggles out of the complicated tangle of limbs they seem to have formed in their shared sleep. ‘Cloak on the back of the door,’ he mumbles. ‘Bit exotic, isn’t it?’ Naboo looks up and grins. ‘Suits you though. An’ don’t worry, it’s machine washable.’ Saboo wraps the swirl of glittery purple-and-blue fabric around himself and shuts the door behind him. Naboo snuggles down under the sex-scented bedclothes for a spot more kip. It seems only seconds later that Saboo is shaking him awake again. ‘Naboo…’ ‘Now what?’ ‘I didn’t have any breakfast. Is there anything to eat in this place?’ Naboo sighs, hauls himself out of bed and pulls his robes back on. Now he comes to think of it, he’s pretty hollow himself; this morning’s porridge has finally worn off. ‘Not in here, but there’s stuff in the kitchen. What time is it?’ ‘Half past three in the afternoon.’ ‘Lunchtime,’ Naboo says cheerfully. ‘Let’s go and see what the others have left.’ Saboo’s face falls. ‘Do we have to go and join them?’ ‘Why not?’ ‘They’ll take the piss.’ ‘Well, yeah. But let’s face it, they don’t get a lot of other entertainment round here, they have to make their own.’ Naboo goes to stand face to face with Saboo; takes both his hands. ‘Don’t worry, they’re on our side.’ ‘Even that familiar of yours?’ ‘Bollo’s happy if I’m happy,’ Naboo declares stoutly, ‘an’ I am happy… I got exactly what I wanted for Christmas, in the end.’ ‘So did I, little one.’ Saboo leans down to kiss him softly on the mouth. ‘So did I.’’

…….

It’s a beautiful Xooberon spring day: the suns high and clear, the blue fronds of the featherpalms fluttering and rustling in the ocean breeze. Naboo drains the last mouthful of his purple cocktail. Fuck, that’s good. Good to be warm, good to be back home, good to be at a party... and this is quite some party. Way better than that Christmas disaster, although that did turn out OK in the end. I suppose. Good thing we didn’t invite all this lot, though... The gardens of the Head Shaman’s official residence are thronged with people of all sizes, shapes, genders and colours. It looks as though the entire Shaman Academy has turned up, and then there are all Methuselah’s friends, fans, photographers, stylists and hangers-on... many of them young and handsome men, or pretty girls, but today Dennis and his wife have no eyes for anyone but each other. Dennis looks great, don’t think I’ve ever seen him so relaxed and confident. And Methuselah is much less scary when she’s smiling, and now she’s grown her hair longer that flowing dress suits her, even though it’s sort-of brown... the sort of colour that Howard would’ve chosen. There’s probably a name for it, I’ll have to ask him. Naboo glances across the lawn to where Howard and Vince are standing by the fountain. Howard has a big daft grin plastered permanently across his face; occasionally he glances down at the ring on his left hand, and then at Vince, as if either of them might disappear at any moment. Vince is in his element, of course. He loves parties. He’s chatting away to anyone and everyone, his hair immaculately root-boosted and feathered and tinted (it took him a week), his hand never letting go of Howard’s arm. ‘They look happy,’ a gruff voice says in Naboo’s ear. ‘That good to see.’ ‘Yeah.’ Naboo turns and smiles at his familiar. ‘Yeah, it is...’ ‘Bollo!’ a high voice squeaks. ‘Haven’t seen you in ages. Come an’ meet the girlfriend.’ A bat is flittering round the gorilla’s ears. ‘Not now, Chrissy. Now not a good time.’ Bollo’s face creases into a worried frown. ‘Go on, ya berk,’ Naboo tells him. ‘I’m fine. Saboo’ll be back in a minute, he won’t wanna miss the boss’s speech. Say hi to Barry for me.’ ‘Alright then.’ Bollo shambles off towards a bunch of bespectacled, red-haired shamen whose familiars – all airborne – range from the tiny bat to a twelve-foot red dragon. And here comes Saboo making his way back from the bar, his tall figure weaving gracefully through the crowd. A little twinge of anxiety gnaws at Naboo’s insides. Bollo isn’t the only one who’s worried. Saboo’s been so quiet lately. Something’s on his mind. Didn’t pick up on it for a while, what with all the excitement of Howard and Vince announcing their engagement and then Dennis convening this gathering. Maybe when the party’s over I might suggest he and I stay on here for a couple more days, spend some time together, maybe rent one of the cabins by the beach and just enjoy the warmth and the quiet. Perhaps Saboo’s just in need of some downtime: there’s been a fuck of a lot of organizing to do on Dennis’s behalf to get this event to actually happen. The big man may be magic, but he’s hopeless at practicalities... ‘Whoever suggested we let Tony Harrison run the bar must have been out of his fucking mind.’ Saboo is fuming as he hands Naboo another glass. Naboo giggles. ‘Yeah. You were. I remember that planning meeting. Parts of it anyway... Cheers.’ Saboo smiles as they clink glasses, but he won’t meet Naboo’s eyes. Naboo takes a deep breath. ‘Saboo...’ But he is interrupted by a squeal of feedback from the loudspeakers of the public address system. ‘Is this thing on?’ Dennis’s voice booms anxiously. Dennis and Methuselah are standing hand-in-hand on the terrace in front of the house; Dennis is peering at the microphone in his hand as though afraid it might bite him. Methuselah whispers something in his ear, and he smiles. ‘Ah. Apparently it is. Ladies and gentlemen and all those in between – Friends – I bid you welcome.’ There is a short silence while the Head Shaman rummages through the pockets of his voluminous ceremonial robe and produces a crumpled handkerchief. ‘Ah.’ He wipes his brow and puts the handkerchief away again. ‘I had, um, written a substantial speech for this important occasion but I, er, seem to have mislaid my notes.’ ‘Well, there’s a surprise,’ Saboo mutters. ‘But no matter. Now that I see you all, I realise that what I have to say is actually very simple.’ ‘Like you, D-Man,’ Tony cackles. A ripple of laughter runs through the crowd, but Dennis is unperturbed. ‘I am a simple man, yes. And I am simply very fortunate to have so many friends, and most fortunate of all to have such a beautiful and patient wife. My dear’ – he turns to her – ‘you were generous enough to give me a second chance. A new start. In token of which I would like to renew the vows we made when first we bound ourselves to each other – the vows I bent and broke and brushed aside – if you are willing – ’ He chokes a little. Naboo brushes away a tear. I was a part of that bending and breaking... I’m just glad I was part of the mending as well. Methuselah puts a finger to Dennis’s lips. ‘Of course I will. A new start, yes. Leave the past in the past, and with all our friends to bear witness, let us remake our bond. Where is our Moderator?’ The ancient ex-Head Shaman shuffles forward to officiate. Just as well the secular ceremony is short and simple. Poor old sod doesn’t look as though he’d make it to the end of anything long and complicated. Needs a trip to the Fountain of Youth if you ask me. Everybody cheers as Dennis and Methuselah seal their re-made bond, first with a formal kiss, and then with a much longer and more informal one. I remember how that feels... Naboo sighs, and looks away. He can see Howard and Vince holding hands and smiling; Vince notices him watching them, and grins. Then Methuselah takes the microphone and steps forward. ‘Thank you, Dennis. And thank you all for being with us. I will not waste much of your time. I know some of you have serious drinking to do, don’t you, Tony?’ She waits for the laughter and catcalls to subside. ‘We have one more announcement to make. Another new start. My Dennis and I, we are expecting our firstborn in the autumn...’ Whatever else she was going to say is drowned out by a burst of cheering and applause from the audience. Then the band is playing, the champagne is flowing, and Dennis, looking proud but slightly stunned, takes Methuselah’s arm and leads her around the garden, circulating through the crowd of guests, accepting their congratulations. Even Saboo is smiling. Dennis looms up beside them; Naboo hugs him, hard. ‘Nice one, big man. Listen, lemme know anytime you need a babysitter.’ Saboo snorts derisively. ‘Seriously,’ Naboo says, giving Saboo the finger behind Dennis’s back, ‘I’m a bit of an expert, I ’ad to rear those two human idiots over there, remember? Six soddin’ weeks of changin’ nappies an’ four-hourly feeds before I found an incantation to get ’em back to their proper ages... so anytime, just call me, OK?’ ‘Thank you,’ Dennis says gravely. ‘No worries.’ Naboo hugs him again. ‘So happy for ya...’ Dennis feels big and warm and solid. He feels like coming home, like safety and comfort... Dennis takes a step back, and looks down; his voice is pitched for Naboo’s ears alone. ‘What’s wrong?’ ‘Dunno exactly.’ There’s no point lying to someone who can see right through you, literally. ‘Man trouble?’ ‘Somefink like that.’ ‘I thought so. Could see it from across the room.’ Naboo looks up into those knowing pale-blue eyes. ‘You got any magic to fix it?’ Dennis smiles gently. ‘You don’t need magic. It’s very simple, Naboo. Just ask him.’ Before he can explain what this pronouncement means – if he even knows himself – Dennis is hailed by someone else, and lets Naboo go. Ask Saboo? Ask him what’s wrong? But he might deny that anything’s wrong at all, in which case he’d be lying, and then we’re stuffed; or worse, he might actually tell me what’s wrong, and it might be something that can’t be fixed... Saboo puts a hand on Naboo’s shoulder. ‘Oh, dry up, you idiot, this is supposed to be a happy day.’ He snorts again. ‘Never thought the D-Man was parent material. Nor the D-Man’s woman, come to that.’ ‘Just shows that even the perfect Saboo can be sometimes wrong,’ Methuselah says drily from right beside him, making him jump and look sheepish. ‘I’m sorry,’ he stammers, ‘I – I didn’t mean...’ Naboo winces, waiting for the inevitable blow to fall. But she is laughing; patting Saboo on the arm. ‘I am not offended, I never thought of myself as mother, either. Even I can be sometimes wrong also. Now, if you do not mind, I should like to borrow your Naboo for a short while, there is something I need to discuss with him. No, not about last Christmas’ – she laughs again – ‘do not look so dismayed, I meant it when I said the past is in the past. I need to ask a favour, that is all. Naboo, if you will please come with me...’ ‘Sure.’ Naboo shrugs. ‘Whatever.’ He thinks he hears Saboo mutter something at the same time: ‘he’s not mine,’ perhaps? But there’s no time to ask, Methuselah is taking his arm and leading him firmly out of the crowd. ‘Somewhere quiet,’ she says, ‘let us try the rose garden. This way.’ Naboo follows her through a gate in the hedge and across a green, sunlit lawn edged with flowering rosetrees. I wonder what the fuck this is about. I know she said the past is past, but...We haven’t talked about that Christmas party, ever. Better try not to say the wrong thing, or she might lose it and hit me. My glass is empty, too... I wonder whether I’m going to get another drink or a decent smoke anytime soon... There’s a double seat under an archway at the far end, canopied with heavily scented climbing roses; Methuselah sits down and motions Naboo to sit beside her. ‘I know I said this was not to talk about last Christmas.’ She plucks a leaf, twirls it nervously between her slender fingers. ‘But... I do want to thank you, Naboo, thank you for saving our marriage, for showing my Dennis how to be honest with me.’ Naboo sighs inwardly with relief. She’s not going to hit me, then. ‘I’m glad I helped, but I didn’t really do anything.’ ‘No.’ She shakes her head vehemently. ‘If it were not for you, we would be separated by now, and this baby that is on the way, he would not be on the way, he would not exist at all.’ ‘That’s... quite a responsibility.’ ‘It is also a wonderful gift.’ She is smiling now. ‘And in appreciation, we would like to ask you, will you stand mentor to our son when he is born?’ Well. Wasn’t expecting that one. That’ll offend a lot of well-connected Xooberon nobility who will have been hoping for the honour. And am I really up to the job? But if it’s Dennis’s choice... ‘I – well, yes, course I will, but – there’s plenty of other shamen who’ll do a better job, I mean, I don’t even live on-planet and I’m not exactly...’ ‘There is no other shaman who has such a link to our family. No-one else we would rather ask. You gave Dennis such good advice. I am certain you will do the same again when it is needed.’ ‘I’ll do my best.’ Naboo is slightly choked. Must be the perfume from all those flowers. ‘There is something else also.’ ‘What?’ ‘We would like to name him for you, if you have no objection.’ Naboo chews on his bottom lip. ‘Depends which name. The universe don’t need two Naboos, an’ I’m not bein’ mentor to a boy called Roppity-Poppity...’ ‘But Randolph, that is a good name, a fine name.’ ‘Yeah, that’d be OK, I s’pose.’ ‘Thank you. It is settled, then.’ She puts a hand over her stomach. ‘Randolph it is.’ Then she giggles. ‘I am very pleased, but Dennis’s family will not be. They are so traditional, they disapprove of him marrying extreme sports calendar model, and every firstborn male is always named Dennis. Father, grandfather, great grandfather, Dennis, Dennis, Dennis... But not this time. This time, we break tradition... Oh.’ She catches her breath suddenly. ‘You OK?’ ‘I’m fine. Just the baby kicking, I think he hears us. You want to feel him?’ ‘Well, I –’ I do want to feel, I want it very much indeed, contact with that small new life that is somehow in some weird way linked with mine. But touching the Head Shaman’s wife... might that be crossing the line? She grasps his wrist; places his hand on her belly. ‘There. Can you feel him?’ ‘I can feel...’ Yes. Yes. The kicking comes again, and oh, I can, I can feel it, can feel everything that’s going on in there, every twitch and heartbeat and... Blimey. ‘What is it?’ She’s looking anxiously into his face. ‘Naboo, what can you feel?’ With regret, he takes his hand away, and is surprised to find his cheeks are wet with tears. ‘I fink, you’re going to be able to make Dennis’s family happy too.’ ‘What do you mean?’ ‘I mean...’ He sniffs, and wipes his eyes on the sleeve of his party robe. ‘There’s two in there. Twins. Two boys.’ Methuselah’s eyes are wide. ‘Are you certain?’ ‘Absolutely. So you can call one of ’em Dennis after all. The big one.’ ‘Dennis Junior and Randolph.’ She is laughing with sheer delight. ‘Randolph and DJ. Oh, Naboo, this is wonderful, we have to go and tell Papa Dennis right now.’ ‘Make sure he’s sitting down first.’ ‘Do you think your Saboo would stand mentor to DJ?’ ‘Dunno. S’pose we could just ask him.’ Just ask him... oh, fuck, of course, how could I be such a blind numpty? I know what Dennis meant now, the question I’ve got to ask Saboo, should have asked him already really, cos he’s been waiting for me to ask it, and hopefully he’ll say yes to her and yes to me and then everything will be all right... ‘Come on, then.’ Methuselah jumps to her feet. Naboo takes her hand, and together they run back through the sunlit rose garden.

#the mighty boosh #mighty boosh #boosh #saboo #naboo #naboo the enigma #naboo/saboo #naboo/dennis #dennis the head shaman #dennis/methuselah #saboo/methuselah #howince #vince noir #howard moon #vince noir/howard moon #vince/howard #howard moon/vince noir #bollo

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mrskandiibaby2269 · 7 years

Text

For Old Times Sake

For Old Time Sake

Pt.1

Damn what’s it been about over 10 years

You look well

Real well and good

Yeah it’s cool if we text

But on a friend level

Because I don’t want upset your wife

And my man on my side

He crazy but it’s all good

And innocent

Yeah that’s what we say now

But what about later on

Our intentions is gonna make the next move

Bored at home no one to talk to

Your voice on the other end

Is still just as smooth I mean damn

I’m not suppose to feeling this way

Feelings from way back when

When we had something

Flashbacks making me hot

Thoughts of what we did in

High school got me melting

And quietly actin a fool

Over this phone I gotta play it cool

Damn boo… I mean dude

Again that smooth voice

Is making me ache

Say what ?

Yeah I remember when I said this

And when you said that

Hell yeah our phone sex convos

Was crazy just thinking bout em

Got me playing with my—

Damn please tell me I didn’t say dat

Out loud I’m sorry if I’m making you

Feel uncomfortable I’ll hang up now

No wait do you still have that sex ache

No I don’t

Stop playing be real do you still have

That sex ache

Yes, ok yeah I do

Close your eyes and image me

Right there

Rub your clit nice and slow

Hold on are we really doing this ?

Yea we are for old times sake tho….

To Be Continued

Damn you sure ain’t making this easy

I’m over here getting wetter by the

Minute

Wait hold up

Am I hearing what I think I’m

Hearing plies talking bout his girl

Who got a pretty pussy

But he put a “Ms.” in front of it

Excuse me sir what are you trying

Do to me

Just tryna make you hot and wet

Like things use to be

We can’t do this this is so wrong

But you know it feels so good

Mmm tell me what you got on

Really, I can’t do this

Come on please tell me what you

Got on

A white tank and some shorts

Take it all off

Nice and slow

Now there goes usher throwback

Playing on the radio

That better not be chris brown

wet the bed

Yeah it’s is and you about to do the

Same thing in a few

Damn I want you so bad

I really do miss you

I miss you and I want you too

Can you feel me spreading you legs

Apart and kissing your thighs

Slowly making my way to your

Pretty Pussy damn you still taste

Sweet as fuck

Can you feel my tongue traveling

All over your lips

Yes I can mmm shit

Keep going baby rub that clit

While I go in circles

Over and over

Kissing and licking and slurping

On your lips

Non stop

How am I doing baby

Mmmm real good

Good go ahead cum in my mouth

Mmmm got me moaning your name

Keep going while I go inside you

Deep deeper and deeper

While

your legs get weaker and weaker

Damn now 2012 by CBreezy

Got me wetter like crazy don’t stop

Don’t worry I’m not

Can you feel me going in and out

Hitting your spot

Looking into your eyes

Kissing you

Mmmm yes yes mmmm Ahhh yes

Tell me you like it baby

I like it baby ohhh I like it

I’m flipping you over

Ride me mommy

I’m going up and down

Grinding my body back and forth

Squeezing my pussy tighter on

Your dick

Damn, that feels so good

don’t stop

Put your hands on my hips

While I bounce you up and down

Harder and harder

And you go

deeper and deeper inside of

You

While I feel your juices sliding

down my

Dick

Mmmm aghhh

Fuck shit

Go faster

While you smack

Yo ass

Mmmmm ooouuu yasss daddy

I like it rough

Flip you over on your knees

Put that arch in your back

While I hit it hard

Rough and deep

Smack my ass and repeat

Soon as we get started

Making love going hard

I hear ….

Trey Songz got the neighbors Knowing his name

Home alone so I can do the same

Me too

Fuck __________

Damn__________

You feel so fucking good

Cum on my dick

Not until I suck it

Push you down on the bed

And take you in my mouth

Whipping my tongue in circles

From the tip down to

the whole meat a lil bob

And spit here

A lil bob and slurp there

Add it all up and I’m going crazy

Bobbing my head up and down

While you pull and tug on my hair

How does it feel daddy?

It feels amazing mommy keep

Going kee– keep going fuck

Shit I’m fucking your throat

As I deep throat you

Yesss shh-shit

Just like that

Fuck fuck

Fuck it let’s

69!!!!!

I’ll suck you nice and deep I’ll lick and kiss that sweet pussy

Till you nut in my mouth Till you cum in mine

Cum on daddy it’s game time I’m ready baby

Shit don’t stop Take this dick

Take this pussy

Damn I miss this pussy Fuck I miss this dick

So fucking good

I’m biting my lip and the pillow

I’m gripping the sheets

While you ride

Now I’m on top

Got your legs in the air

Beating this pussy up

Yes you is

Baby we don’t need no script

For this

Twista and Chris

Got us cutting up and acting out

Like a camera is following our

Every move

I’m not tired yet how about you

Hell no let’s do it baby

Round 2

Pt.2

To be continued

You good

Yea I’m straight boo

What about you

I’m ready to take this action

To the kitchen

Oh forreal bring it on baby

Take me daddy

Put you on the counter

Lay you on your back

As I kiss you and rub you pussy

Mmmm I love how that pussy

Sounds let me get the whip cream

So I can eat you like a snack

Mmmm damn daddy it’s so cold

But it feels good tho

Ha yea I know it’s about to feel

A lot better once I countdown

You gonna get wetter

I’m calling you daddy come And make it rain down on me

See there twista again actin up

Moving yo tongue to rhythm of

The beat

Damn you doing it so smooth

Got me scratching up the marble

Counter top and my toes curling up

My hands palming your head

So you can get all can eat and get

Full like a buffet

Damn daddy you my pussy

Like it some birthday cake

Mmmm aghhh fuck ooouuu

You like that baby ?

Yes ohhh yes I do I mmmm damn

I'ma let my tongue keep traveling

your sweet pussy like a journey

Damn baby you taste so delicious

Mmmm fingering you while

I’m licking your clit

Ohhh shit don’t cha stop or quit

I’m about to squirt mmm ahhh yass

Go ahead do it in my mouth

Mmmm ahhhh oouuu fucckk

Mmmm damn mmm you taste

So fucking good I can eat you

For days

Now let me do you

Flip you over and crawl down

Shake up the whip–

Nah matter of fact

I’m in the mood for ice cream

Take one scoop and put it in

My mouth brace yourself

It’s gonna b cold but whatever you

Do try not to shout

Holla or —fuck it

I scream you scream we all scream

For ice cream

Placing ice cold sugary mouth filled

On you dick

Taking my time stirring up the treat

With my tongue around you dick

Slurping It off like a slurpe

On a hot summer day

Gotdamn!!! Mmm shit ______

Keep going

Yea daddy pull my hair if you got to

I don’t mind if you that

🎶It’s five in the morning And I’m up having phone sex With you🎶

Damn fuck

Ahhhh mmmm

Agggh

Hell yea ________

That’s one of our songs

The sounds of slurping

Sucking licking smacking

My lips and Choking my throat

On dick

Is making you even more harder

Ooouuu shit I love it when you say

Fuck!!! Suck this dick yea take

This dick _____

🎶Woah Lover when you call my Name no other can do that the Same🎶

Yeah yes hmm hmm yasss daddy

That’s it be my motivation

While I pick you up

And bounce you up and down

On my dick

Putting you against the wall

Fuck daddy right there that’s my

Spot mmmm got damn

How it feel baby

So fucking good shit mmm

Ahhhh fuck fuck

Damn daddy

Pt.3

🎶You should stay over the night with me one night stand all I need Just you and me 🎶

Aghhh shit you got my pussy

So wet it’s soaking your dick

Hell yea and I love that shit

The word “Damn” and sweet

Moans falls from our lips

As we stare in each other’s eyes

And kiss the electricity between

Our bodies

I mean the mutual

Sensual seduction , Lust and

Infatuation got me

Scratchin’ up your back

And you

Gripping my thighs and stroking

Me harder and deeper

And I got your eyes rolling to back

Of your head and vice versa

Doing the same thing

Shit

Mmm yea baby

Oooh damn

Are you tired ? Had enough

Ha not even close

Oh ok let’s make our way to the

Shower

You read my mind

Let’s slow it down a little this time

Just slow grind on my dick

While you lift me up

And put you against the wall

Hitting your walls

Going rough and deep

Inside of me While the water is glides down

And hits our bodies

I’m Kissing you on your neck

I’m Kissing you on your tits

Mmmm shit

That feel good baby

Hell yes sending chills up my spine

Ooouu yasss daddy do it

Take your time

Damn this feel so damn good

This pussy is amazing

This dick is insane

Bending you over

My hands on the walls

I slide in slow and deep

I gasp for air and play with my tits

While I shed a tear and weep

Damn so fuckin good making me

Cry

Mmmm ahhhh shit

Fuck yea throw it back just like

That mmmh hmmm

Got me biting my lips

Smacking yo ass so hard

Ouiuu i think you left a hand print

But I love it daddy

I know you baby

🎶No teasing you been waiting long enough go deep. I'ma throw at cha can’t catch it. Don’t hold back you know I like it rough🎶

So let’s take it to the bedroom

Lay you down on the bed

And take a lustful look at you

Playing with yourself

I’m jacking off watching you

Mmmmm ahhh shit

Go deeper finger yourself deeper

Ima go faster

And rub that clit till your squirt

Ahhhh shit damn daddy

Giving you the signal to come here

I want some more of Daddy dick

Ohh shit here he come baby

I’m right here

🎶we ain’t gonna stop till 9am if you can’t take it all, baby say when make you cum over and over again and Ima leave it in when we do it all night🎶

Are you sure you not tired fuck that

Let’s go

How you want it baby fast or slow

It feel so good daddy I want both

But for right now tho

Speed it up do it faster.. faster and

Faster ahhhh mmm shit!!!

You like that baby?

I love it daddy I love it

Mmmm damn you got some

Good pussy

And you got some good dick

Flip you over and ride you for

A minute

Ohhhh shit!!!! Got damn________

Yeah daddy wassup

Talk that shit talk dirty to me daddy

Take this dick bitch take it

Fuckin take this pussy nicca fuccck

We go back and forth

Tumbling on top of each other

Me on the bottom

You on top

You the bottom

Me on top

🎶Cause we having sex on the ceiling take me higher, taker me higher me boy. Switch it up one time 180• drive me crazy me Baby🎶

Damn daddy the mirrors on

the ceiling got me feeling

Myself got me feeling sexy

Like a model and a pornstar

Got me showing off for the camera

Mmmmm shit I love this

Gotdamn don’t stop

🎶It ain’t my first time but baby girl we can pretend hey let’s bump and grind and girl tonight we’ll never end let me take you down🎶

Damn

Shit

Fuck

Ahhhh ahhh mmm

Ahhh fuck

This has been one hell of a show

Both of us getting ready to each

Our climax the grand grande finale

You pull your body closer to me

Kissing and touching

Gripping the sheets

Headboard banging against the

wall

Sweet wetness from my pussy

Is about to fall down on you

Damn I’m about to nut too

Fuck my pussy is so wet

Like a typhoon

My mouth is open wide

To catch it all

Let’s do one last 69

So I can swallow of your nut

And you can lick my wetness

We’ll clean each other up

And enjoy the bliss of this

Awesome moment

Damn what just happened

Idk but I enjoyed it

I got to go tho I’ll call you

Tomorrow

Received a text on my phone

“We gotta do it again tonight text me when you can miss you already ”

While I’m laying down in my bed with a smirk on my face like damn…

What now what I should do

Well I guess it’s another

To be continued….

MrsKandiiBaby💋🍭👅💦😏😘😜

#foroldtimessake

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eastofthemoon · 7 years

Text

Where No One Goes- Chapter 10

Title: Where No One Goes: Chapter 10 - Part 2 of What If The Storm Ends?

Series: Voltron: Legendary Defender

Characters: Keith, Thace, Shiro, Pidge, Lance, Hunk, Coran, and Allura

Rating: G

Summary: After Keith’s encounter Thace, questions remain and he’s not certain he wants the answers to them. However, after Pidge’s request to locate the rebels, the two of them seek out the resistance with both of them not certain what they will find out.

Archive of our Own

Thace looked over the monitors as he watched the paladins take on the ships. He tried to ignore the small pang of worry in the back of his mind as he focussed on the controls.

“All systems go here,” Ford said as the engine started.

“Same here,” Daien said from his seat and winced at the screen. “Think the paladins will be okay?”

“They’ve been in larger battles than this, they’ll be fine” Thace stated in a firm tone to reassure the boy..and himself.

“Leah’s ship will be taking off any minute,” Ford said as he took the passenger seat next to Thace. “We got to be ready to-”

“No! No!” Maya cried as she jumped from her seat. “This is bad!”

“What’s wrong?” Thace asked as he turned around.

“We got droid sentries in our tunnel,” Maya spat.

“What?!” Ford exclaimed as Thace zoomed over and hovered over the girl’s head.

He curse as he saw the image of over a dozen soldiers marching in the tunnel straight towards them. “Porok must have found one of the tunnels and decided to send some ground troops!”

“And they’re marching straight towards us,” Maya said as she slammed the control panel.

Ford growled as Daien inched closer. “But that’s not bad, right?” he said and looked to Ford. “You we have a cannon on this ship.”

“A single cannon,” Ford exclaimed as he raised his arms. “Meant to distract a ship long enough for us to escape. It’s not meant to take out a whole squad!”

“What if we just ram them?” Maya suggested. “We would probably get damaged, but we should still be able enough to fly.”

“We have no way of knowing what they have set up at the end of the tunnel,” Thace said with a wince. “They could have a ship waiting for us and we fly straight into their trap.”

“Not to mention, even if we got through, the ships flying behind us wouldn’t get the same chance,” Daien muttered.

Ford yanked as his ears before stomping to the control panel. “We’ll have to back up, tell the other ships to do the same and take another tunnel out.”

Maya’s eyes widened in alarm. “But if we don’t stop the sentries here, they’ll reach the hangar before everyone else gets out.”

“Hate to add to bad news,” Daien said as he tapped the monitor, “but looks like they got a tank with them.” He groaned. “We’re so dead.”

Thace calmed the boy by patting his shoulder. “No, we’re not...at least you’re not.”

Ford glared as he spun around in the chair. “I know that look, and I hate that look. What are you plotting?”

Thace picked up Keith’s dagger and a tablet as he turned to him. “Stig is flying in just a personal transport ship, correct? Made for one person?”

“Yes,” Ford said with a growl.

“Then he and I are switching and he’ll fly with you,” Thace said as he typed into the tablet and held up the map. “I’m going to use his transport ship and take one of the smaller shortcut tunnels outside.”

“What good will that do?” Maya asked. “You can’t take out all those sentries.”

“No, but if I have bombs place in the right positions it will collapse the tunnel and take them out,” Thace explained as he headed to the door and pressed the button. “By the time they dig themselves out, everyone else should be gone.”

“And how exactly do you plan to get out of here once that’s done?” Ford said as he crossed his arms.

“I’ll use the transport ship and follow you,” Thace confirmed.

“But what if the other sentries catch you while you’re planting the bombs?!” Daien exclaimed.

“Simple, I don’t get caught,” Thace stated in a firm tone.

“This is a risky plan,” Ford stated. “We-”

“It’s the only one we have and we don’t have time to argue,” Thace said as he ventured out of the ship.

Ford sighed and swiftly tossed him a comlink from his pouch. “At least stay in contact so I know you’re not dead.”

Thace caught it as the door closed behind him and he hit the ground running. He had to hurry or everything would be for nothing.

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Lance and the Blue Lion ducked ducked as two ships shot at him. “Could use a little back up here!” he called in the helmet.

“Got you covered!” Pidge cried as her Lion suddenly appeared and headbutted into them. The ships collided into each other, which gave Lance the perfect chance to have Blue shoot.

“Yes! Two more down!” Lance cheered and winced as he saw the other ships. “And only a dozen more to go...how are the rebels doings?”

“They just started to evacuate,” Shiro called. “Keep it up guys!”

Lance took a breathe to calm his nerves. Right, stay focus, he thought as he drove Blue to where the Red Lion was taking down a ship. We can’t slip up here-

“Problem! I’m tied up with three ships and one of them slipped passed me!” Hunk yelled. “They’re heading towards Leah’s ship!”

Lance froze. Leah’s ship. The one the kids were on?!

Blue growled in his mind at the same moment his hands gripped on the control panel.

“Keith, you’re the fastest, can you reach it?!” Shiro exclaimed.

“Arrg! Bit tied up right now,” Keith exclaimed as Red did a somersault away from four ships firing at him.

Lance swallowed, the echo of the promise he made to Xenia ringing in his mind.

Shiro’s cursed over the headset. “Alright, I’ll try-”

“I GOT THIS!” Lance exclaimed as he did a u-turn and had Blue fly at top speed.

“Lance, wait!! Shiro cried, but Lance blocked him out.

He spotted the warship and with Blue reading his mind instantly locked onto it. Leah’s ship was almost out of the stratosphere, but the warship was catching up fast.

“Almost,” Lance muttered as Blue flew closer to it. He couldn’t mess up here. Had to make it count. “Almost.”

The warship looked ready to take a shot as it’s canons warmed up.

“NOW!” Lance slammed on the button and Blue shot out her freeze laser.

The warship staggered as it was hit and ice instantly covered it, but it wasn’t enough. Blue’s sensors indicated the canons were going to fire again. Lance drive Blue straight at it and she gave a loud roar as she cut through the ship effortlessly.

Lance had never be more relieved to see a ship explode. He panted and checked the screen. He nearly panic when he didn’t see Leah’s ship, until Blue’s radar showed the ship was now off the planet. The kids were safe. They were out of danger.

“Got em,” Lance told him as he took in a gulp of air. “I got them.”

“Good job, Lance,” Shiro stated with an amused chuckle.

“Whoa,” Keith said over the headset. “Didn’t know you had it in you.”

“I did,” Hunk commented. “I once saw Lance chase off a dog that scared his little sister.”

Lance gave a smirk as he drove Blue back around. “What can I say? I’m a natural big brother.”

“Well, you’re going to have to do it again because two more are headed your way,” Pidge stated.

Lance turned Blue around and groaned. There were indeed two more ships making a straight beeline for him.

“Terrific,” Lance said as he began to charge at them. “Could use some help on this end-”

A cannon shot fired and hit the two ships. Lance shield his eyes and blinked as he watched the smoking ships fall.

“What the?” he muttered.

“CORAN ATTACK!” Coran’s voice cheered in the comlink. “I will never get tired of that!”

Lance looked at Blue’s monitor and a smile grew. The Castle of Lions hovering over the planet and rapidly firing at the ships.

“Sorry we’re late, Paladins,” Allura shouted over the headset. “What’s the situation?”

“The evacuation just began,” Shiro stated. “We’re trying to provide cover and distract the Galra.”

“So we’re having a ton of fun as you can imagine,” Lance stated. “And had you been here a few minutes ago, you would have seen me being awesome, Princess! I-”

“Tell her later,” Keith shouted. “Shoot now!”

Lance gave a pout, but it vanished as he flew back into the fight. The kids got away safely, now they just had to make certain everyone else did. There was no way that could go wrong! Easy as pie.

080808080808080808080808080808080808080

Thace had not ran so fast since he fled Zarkon’s center of commander after freeing Voltron. He could barely think as he seized the bombs, fly in the small side tunnel to the outside and then plant the bombs near the tunnel’s entrance.

Much to his annoyance sentries had been stationed right outside the tunnel. By some miracle, he managed to sneak past them and ventured inside. Thace would have liked to put more thought into where exactly he planted the bombs, but he was pressed for time as is.

After burying the last bomb in the dirt, he took a deep breath as he placed the remote to set the bombs up his sleeve. “There, that should do it,” he muttered. “As long as nothing else-”

“INTRUDER DETECTED. IDENTIFY YOURSELF OR PREPARED TO BE ARRESTED.”

Thace cursed silently as he slowly turned around to greet a pair of sentry droids each pointing a gun at him.

Just my luck, he thought as he straightened his posture and placed his hands behind his back.

“You don’t recognize me?” he spat in his commanding tone. “I was assigned by Commander Prorok to inspect the stability of this tunnel.”

His hands gripped around the hilt of Keith’s dagger.

“ORDER NOT RECOGNIZED,” the droids said in unison. “GIVE IDENTIFICATION NUMBER OR PREPARE TO BE SHOT.”

“Yes, yes, of course,” Thace said as he stepped forward as he pulled out the dagger from its’ hilt. “I have it in my pocket...Here it it!”

Thace sprang forward and stabbed one of the droids in the chest and then ducked as the other droid shot at him. As predicted, the shot hit the damaged droid in the head. With it out of commission, Thace zoomed in on the other one.

He knocked the gun out of the droids hands and stabbed it in the head with the dagger. Thace took off before he even saw the droid fall to the ground. He could hear more troops coming his way.

They appeared and were prepared to shoot. Thace hit the button on the remote. Explosions rattled the cave and then a rumble was heard as the ceiling began to collapse. The droids looked around in confusion at the falling debris, but one still tried to shoot. Thace ducked and rolled out of the cave, mere seconds before the entrance collapse on itself and the droids.

Thace slammed against a rock and hissed in pain as he came to a stop. “I’ll be feeling that later,” he grumbled as he staggered to stand.

“Thace, you alive?” Ford’s voice came over the comlink.

Thace sighed as he picked it up. “I’m alive..sore, but alive.” He began to walk away from the cave. “I’m going to get into my ship and-”

A laser blast struck him. Thace toppled over, dropping the comlink. He struggled to stand up as he gripped the burns on his sides. He hissed in pain as he turned around and spotted five droids with blasters aiming directly at him.

Thace glared as he rose. “I’m amazed you all aren’t shooting at me this instant.”

“I told them not to,” a familiar voice spoke. Thace froze as Prorok emerged from behind the droids. With his hands tucked behind his back, the commander held a large smirk. “I wanted to save the pleasure for myself.”

Thace opened his mouth to speak, but was cut off as Ford’s voice broke over the comlink.

“Thace? What’s going on?” he spoke. “Quiznak! Answer me-”

Thace stomped on it, smashing it to pieces. I can’t risk Prorok finding the others, he thought grimly.

“Now who was that?” Prorok asked as he stepped forward.

“None of your concern,” Thace said as he reached for his dagger and tried to ignore the pain of his burn.

Prorok’s eyes narrowed as anger washed over his face. “I beg to differ,” he snarled as he approached. “You were my second in command, the one I could rely on the most.” His hand tightened. “Do you have any idea how humiliating it was to discover there was a traitor right under my nose?!”

“I have a rough idea,” Thace muttered under his breath.

The Galran commander’s eyes hardened as he started to circle Thace like a predator waiting to attack. Thace knew there was no point in running. The droids were still pointing their guns at him. He’d been struck down if he even attempted to take a step back.

“I’ll admit,” Thace stated as he held out his dagger, “I’m amazed to see you on the ground during an attack instead of your ship.”

“If you want a job done right, you have to do it yourself,” Prorok spat. “The only way I can redeem myself to Zarkon if I managed to capture the ones who have been targeting our weapon factories lately.”

He gave a small bitter laugh. “When one of my subordinates discovered the cloaked ship in the recording, I had the signals traced hoping it would lead me to you.”

He gestured to where the paladins were fighting. “Load and behold, not only do I find you, but I stumbled upon Voltron.” A cruel smile appeared over his lips. “Now, all I need is to discover who you are working for.”

“I work for no one, but myself,” Thace said as tried to take a step back.

“Those ships the paladins are trying to protect suggest otherwise, but no matter, they’re not my concern at the moment,” Prorok said as he brought out his own dagger. “Whatever secrets you have, I’m certain Lord Zarkon will yank out of your mouth himself...that is if the witch doesn’t beat him to it.”

Thace tensed at that. He had only briefly seen the kind of torture Haggar would engulf upon victims and that was for ‘experimentation’. He didn’t wish to find out what kind she would have in store for him.

“So, what’s your plan then?” Thace asked. “Have your droids shoot me?”

The droids blasters clicked ready to shoot, but Prorok raised his arm. “No, he is mine!” The droids paused and each of them lowered their blasters.

“I need to restore my pride,” Prorok said as he turned to Thace. “Only way to achieve that is to defeat you by my own hands and carry what’s left of you to answer for your crime.”

Thace grimaced as he glanced to this wound. Prorok was a strong warrior and not one to be trifled with. He and Thace had spared in the past, usually with the two of them being on tie, but those were merely for training. Prorok was playing for keeps and Thace’s injury gave him a great advantage.

He no doubt planned for that, Thace thought grimly. Typical Prorok.

“Unless,” Prorok said with a hard frown as he lowered his dagger. “You give yourself up to me.”

Thace faltered slightly. “What?”

“Traitor or not, you worked with me for countless cycles,” he said, “out of respect for that, I’ll give you this offer only once.” He pointed at him. “Tell me who is it you work for and I’ll ask Lord Zarkon to grant you a pardon.”

Thace scoffed at that. He was almost touched by the useless offer. “We both know Zarkon is not that forgiving.”

“Perhaps,” Prorok said with a sneer. “But it’s your only chance at survival.”

“I rather die,” Thace spat with a growl. I’ve given up far too much to let it all fall here.

He thought of Keith and a precious person he had been forced to leave behind long ago. His grip tightened on his dagger. I refuse to loose anything else. I won’t let it be in vain.

Prorok sighed and shook his head like a disappointed teacher. “Then, I’ll take you to Lord Zarkon.” He raised his dagger. “After I teach you a lesson in humiliation!”

Prorok charged and Thace braced himself to block. This was not going to be an easy fight to win.

#thace #keith kogane #galra keith #voltron #voltron legendary defender #vld

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actutrends · 4 years

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Tommy Tallarico is making a lot of noise about Intellivision

Tommy Tallarico has been making noise and music as a sound expert and musician for video games for more than three decades.

But lately, he has been leading a retro gaming revival as head of Intellivision Entertainment, which is building Amico, a new version of the famous retro game console from the 1990s. 2020 is going to be a big year in that effort, as Tallarico has committed to launching the new machine on October 10, or as Tallarico likes to say, “10/10/20.”

Tallarico also found himself at odds with Roblox over the Roblox “death sound,” a comical “oof” noise that has become famous to the 100 million kids who play games in the virtual gaming world. Tallarico says he originally created the sound in 1999 for use in the Messiah video game that came out in 2000.

He forgot about it until he learned recently that it has become an iconic sound for Roblox, which never asked his permission to use it. Tallarico is trying to negotiate with Roblox to get some royalties out of the company, but he says negotiations aren’t going well.

Tallarico spoke at the 2020 Kids@Play and FamilyTech Summit at CES 2020, the big tech trade show in Las Vegas last week, and I interviewed him ahead of that session.

Here’s an edited transcript of our interview.

Above: Intellivision Amico

GamesBeat: What’s your update on how things are going now?

Tommy Tallarico: It’s great. Here’s the latest controller. We decided to, in the hardware–we moved the buttons here. This is still a 3D printout, but these are the molds. The buttons light up. The gyroscope is working. You can see all the fun stuff there, the touch screen. The disc, which I don’t think you’ve seen working yet–a normal D-pad is eight positions. Up, down, left, right, and diagonals. We have 64 positions. You can see that there. We have pressure on it as well.

GamesBeat: 64 positions, is that harder to do?

Tallarico: Exactly. When you’re skiiing, for example, and you’re going like this–it’s like an analog stick. But with analog sticks, it always pulls back to the center. When you play a game like Missile Command, for example, or Centipede, in the old days you’d use the trackball and roll it around. In the last 25-30 years, you either had to use a D-pad, which was crap, or you would have to use the analog stick. But the analog stick, it’s always pulling back to the center.

This is the great thing about the controller. For our Missile Command, we can just use this. Now, wherever your thumb goes–it’s so much easier. And this can become a fire button. This can be Centipede. Or if you’re a lefty it can be like this. If you prefer trigger buttons it can be like this. It’s whatever you want it to be. What’s interesting is when we give these to little kids. They hold it like this automatically, because they’re used to a phone. When you give it to millennials, they automatically hold it like a PlayStation controller.

We decided to go with a capacitive touch screen, which bumped our build and materials up. This is a resistive touch, but we’re going with the glass touch as well. It’s just more responsive. We felt like it was so important that this be perfect. We decided to spend some more money and switch over. I tried to get it for CES, but we just couldn’t do it in time.

All of the retailers are super-excited. Wal-Mart and Best Buy and GameStop. GameStop and Wal-Mart are probably our two biggest fans right now. We’re appealing–the whole idea is to bring families together. We’re not necessarily appealing to the hardcore gamer. Our go-to-market strategy is to go after moms who have young kids. Most GameStops are in malls. Who’s shopping between nine in the morning and three in the afternoon? It’s moms with young kids. Even GameStop tells us that moms will walk in at noon with their four-year-old and say, “Do you have anything for my four-year-old?” What are they gonna sell them?

We’re in an interesting time in history in that baby boomers were the number one generation on the planet. Their kids are millennials. Their kids took over last year. Millennials are now the number one age group on the planet. Millennials are all in their early 30s now. As you know, they found their careers later. They got married later, left the home later, had kids later. In the U.S. alone, there are 21 million households that have children between the ages of two and seven. That’s never happened before. In Europe, there’s another 21 million. If you add Canada and Mexico, all of North America and Europe, there are 65 million households that have kids between the ages of two and seven.

In regards to a home console, Xbox and PlayStation are more for teenagers. They start to get the Switch around eight, 10 years old. Even Roblox and Minecraft are seven, eight, nine. A lot of our strategy is, let’s also have games–yes, we have the retro reimagined stuff we’re doing. Yes, we have tons of sports and recreational games. Not only baseball, football, soccer, but cornhole and bowling and darts and pool. All those recreational games. Tons of board games, whether it’s Yahtzee or Farkle or Wheel of Fortune or things like that.

Above: Intellivision Amico controller.

Image Credit: Intellivision

Let’s take a game like Texas Hold ‘Em for example, where everyone has their two cards on the controller and the flop is on the screen. This is the kind of stuff that’s never been before. What if you have dice in a Farkle game? You see the dice and shake it when it’s your turn. You throw it and it goes up on the screen. Every game we’re making is unique to our controller. They cannot be put on a PlayStation or Xbox or Switch or mobile.

All of the edutainment, like all of the hypercasual stuff, is only on mobile. Again, you read the information, the statistics, and the number one concern of parents with young kids is that they give them too much screen time. This becomes the babysitter. The parents give it to the kid, but they want to limit it. Then the kid gets hooked. That’s our whole thing. Play with your children. You’ll be able to play simple, affordable games together. That’s our tagline: “Together again.” You see it everywhere on all our stuff.

GamesBeat: You said more than 100 games?

Tallarico: There’s going to be about 40 games at launch. Then every 10 to 14 days we’ll come out with one game at a time. We’re never going to release two games at once. Keep in mind, it’s a closed system. We’re going to be announcing, at E3, all of our licenses. It’s all the greatest licenses you can imagine in one place. Not only for kids, but for adults. There’s a lot of stuff that people are going to be delightfully surprised by.

GamesBeat: How would you compare and contrast this to competition like the Atari boxes?

Tallarico: They’re in a whole different realm. I still haven’t seen an original game on their system and they’re supposed to ship in a couple of weeks. I think they’re going for this sandbox–I view it as almost like a Raspberry Pi on steroids, a really amazing super-fast kind of tinkerer’s thing. I would love for Atari to succeed so that we can, after 40 years, kick their asses. [Laughs] Round two of the original console war!

I’ll share a little secret with you. We announced that we’re going to do a founder’s edition. We’ll take pre-orders on it at the end of the month, in a couple of weeks. It’s going to be a limited number, and that limited number is 2600. They’ll all be hand-signed and numbered and the whole thing. So yeah, I think it’ll be fun. I say this all with tongue in cheek, but I think it would be fun to relive the original console war. But have fun with it. Of course I don’t have any ill will toward anyone. I think what they’re doing is something very different, obviously, than what we’re doing. We’ll see if there’s a market for what they’re doing too.

The post Tommy Tallarico is making a lot of noise about Intellivision appeared first on Actu Trends.

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heanovelthoughts-blog · 7 years

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Books2Read | Amazon | Nook | Kobo | iBooks

They say the college years are what really shape a person for adulthood, and although rare, unbreakable bonds of friendship can be made.

Gianna Moretti, Alexis Cole and Shelby Lansing are about to discover just how true that is.

When the three of them are thrust together in a new city and on their own for the first time at Boston College, none of them expected to click so suddenly despite their many differences.

They also didn’t anticipate how much their lives would be changed.

Forgotten dreams, family secrets and heartbreaking fears are revealed as they grow, learn and laugh together. What started as a bond of circumstance quickly becomes something they never realized they’d all been missing –true friendship.

However, when devastation strikes, will their friendship survive?

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About Elle Vanzandt

Elle Vanzandt grew up a Navy brat who has had the privilege of living in many places but she will always call Illinois her home. A stay-at-home mom to two amazing children, a blogger, and a writer, she wears many hats. With determination and strength taught to her by her mother, she has made it through many obstacles, always sticking with the family motto ‘pull up your bootstraps and get it done’. Writing is an adventure she could have never predicted but is enjoying the ride all the same. In her free time you can find Elle with a book in one hand and a cup of coffee in the other. Background noise is a must, usually in the form of her kids, but Netflix and country music on Spotify come in a close second and third.

Facebook | Twitter | Goodreads

About P. Marie

P. Marie lives in a small town outside of Boston where she was born and raised. She resides in the house she grew up in with her husband of 33 years and her two fur babies, Tek and Tessie. She is the proud mother of two adult children as well. While she is a corporate girl during the day, she has become both a writer and blogger by night. P. Marie says she owes her success to her mother who taught her that if you believe in yourself, you can achieve anything.

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Grab this fun coming of age novel by @AuthorEVanzandt and P Marie! #WelcomeToBeantown Books2Read | Amazon | Nook | Kobo | iBooks They say the college years are what really shape a person for adulthood, and although rare, unbreakable bonds of friendship can be made.

#Beantown #ComingofAge #ElleVanZandt #HEANovelThoughts #NewRelease #PMarie #ReleaseBlitz #WelcomeToBeantown

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