#I LITERALLY LOVE HIM SO MICH
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Asahi photo dump again<333
#I LITERALLY LOVE HIM SO MICH#lizandbo#like I’m so fucking in love#I think this is a problem#help 💀#he’s just so cuddly and kind and non judgrmental and I just wanna get crushed by him n his arms and AGRGRGHRGRGDGHFGDGDH#Haikyuu#asahi#asahi azumane#asahi azumane manga panels#asahi azumane anime#<3
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HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY SON, MY BEAUTIFUL BABY BOY EDOGAWA RANPO
oh and Edogawa Ranpo I guess.
This fictional character is my heart my soul, I respond to people with Ranpo, I buy stuff for Ranpo, I read stuff about Ranpo, I wrote fanfiction for Ranpo, we have the same enneangram type, I kin this man so hard you don't even know. I just want him to have a happy birthday...
ALSO GO READ RANPOS ACTUAL WORKS!!! THEY ARE REALLY GOOD!!!
#i swear i love him so much i-#hes my 26 year old son#hes so smart and amazing and#a#especially after reading “the untold origins of the armed detective agency”#like???#i understand him even more and feel him even more#like bby thats autism#you dont get people? you think social norms are hard and you literally need fukuzawa to teach you them? you cant not remeber something#and it annoys you?#you notice little things and get confused when others dont notice them? and then miss the big picture? baby#baby#i love him so mich and he does so much for the Agency and loves the people aroumd him so much and-#bsd ranpo edogawa#bsd edogawa ranpo#Edogawa ranpo#ranpo edogawa#bsd rampo#bsd ranpo#bsd rampo edogawa#bsd edogawa rampo#bungou Stray Dogs#bungo stray dogs
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eating dinner and then drawing this image
#HES SO SILLY#I LOVE HIM SO MICH#violently crying and throwing up over him#he’s literally the worst ever#and i adore him
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Inside Y/N L/N’s Bag | Vogue | Dad!H
MASTERLIST | PATREON
“Hi Vogue I am Y/N L/N and this is what’s in my bag.”
After she introduces herself, Y/N looks down at the bag in her lap. The bag she had used every single day was a personalized Pleasing mesh bag. It was a light pink color and had a blue ribbon tied onto one of the straps.
It was clear that it meant a lot to her.
“What I carry with me everyday is this.” She says grabbing onto her bag. “You can fit anything in here. And the thing about this is, it’s technically Inez’s diaper bag.”
Y/N then grins at the memory of Harry gifting her the tote.
“This specific bag was gifted to me by my husband a while ago, right before he had launched Pleasing. My son actually loves this bag and has one of his own but smaller. He doesn't go anywhere without it.” Y/N shares.
Setting her carrier onto the wooden coffee table in front of her, the Styles woman reaches into her bag and pulls out a bag of candy. Beau's favorite type.
Y/N remembers the night when Harry had got their son addicted to the chocolate minstrels.
“My son is obsessed with these and when I saw them I had to get them for him.” She laughs. “I spoil my kids way too much.”
The next thing Y/N pulled out was her phone. Just a plain iPhone 14 with a case that she had stolen from Harry or borrowed it, so she said. Once she taps on the screen her face lights up.
Her lock screen was a photo of a newborn Inez sleeping on Harry’s chest with Beau right beside them.
She almost shed a tear.
“This is my phone, nothing special until you look at the lock screen.” Y/N grins. She loved her family so deeply.
After placing her phone onto the table, she slides her hand into her carrier pulling out a blue bandanna. It previously belonged to Harry until Inez came around and slid the bandanna off of her father’s head.
It was truly her favorite thing in the world. You could say it was sort of like a safety blanket for her.
“Harry’s bandanna or should I say Inez’s bandanna. That girl loves this thing so much.”
-
A small bag of diapers, bibs, toy trucks, hair clips that she had stole back from Harry, kids sunscreen, Love on Tour’s backstage/V.I.P passes, bandaids, Harry’s headphones, her family’s passports and a camera
“Since we’re currently on tour and always traveling I always have to carry my children’s essentials.” Y/N explains looking at all the items laid out in front of her. “You can never be unprepared.”
Just five years ago her bag was filled with very different items than now. She was now a mother and had a family with a man she’s always wanted to grow old with.
Two kids later and she’s become a changed woman, a better one. She’s always valued the life she had, especially right now. Y/N couldn't have been more happy.
“Another toy!” Y/N laughs, pulling out another toy from her bag. “A mini statue of our dog Kendall who was actually named after Kendall Roy from Succession since Harry is obsessed with that show.” She holds out a miniature dog in her palm.
Following the toy, she slides out a pair of rings that clearly belonged to Harry Styles since they were his initials.
Y/N leans forward and slips the rings into her back pocket. She remembers the last time Harry had lost jewelry. It was at Coachella and he went insane looking for them.
“We are not losing any more rings.”
Comments:
harryfan2 WHEN WAS THEIR WEDDING OMFG?????
harryfan10 best mother in the world truly
harryfan4 harry’s love for succession has me rolling 😭😭
harryfan8 this. is. what. we. needed.
harryfan13 THE LOCK SCREEN
harryfan7 i cannot stress how much i love this video
harryfan5 the literal girl version of harry
harryfan9 harry is finally y/n’s husband 🧎♂️
harryfan11 i’m literally crying
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tag list: @harrysmatcha @harryspinkpillow @helen-with-an-a @florencepughily @peterparkerbae @toji-dabi-wife @fallonx @drphilssoulmate @cherriesrae @alienorknight @valluvsu @ayeshathestyles @hazgoldenstyles @eiffelmezarry @tsukishimawhore @renatavieira @michellekstyles @eleanordaisy @shawnsblue @agustdpeach @hannahnikohl @whoscamila @ch3rryrry @msolbesg @futuristicpalacegardenpsychic @youusunshineyoutemptress @cherryfragrancx @milkiane @golden-hoax @sunshinemendes8 @your--sweetest--downfall @melllinaa @tenaciousperfectionunknown @cashtons-wife @stellarossii @scenesofobx @manifestrry @lomlolivia
#harry styles x reader#dad!harry#harry styles#harry styles au#harry styles fanfiction#harry styles x y/n#harry styles x you#boyfriend!harry#husband!harry#harry styles writing#harry styles one shot#harry styles blurb#harry styles fake ig#harry styles fan fic#dilf!harry#harry styles fluff#harry styles imagine
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soft launch.
in which, mick is soft launching you.
mich schumacher x reader.
fc: sophia birlem.
liked by maxverstappen1, estebanocon, y/n and 789 009 others.
mickschumacher: holiday season 🏝🗺
_
fan1: wait a damn minute…
fan2: WHO IS THAT
fan3: with all due respect you look delicious but WHO is that lovely lady?
fan4: the pic is so cute omg
fan5: whoever that is i hope she’s good to him
fan6: NOT MY HUSBAND
fan7: mick soft launching?
fan8: the rings 🫠
fan9: who is that slut next to mick?
fan10: new wag alert
fan11: those comments are not it, he’s a grown ass man let him be
fan12: i bet he’s going to ditch her after summer ends lmao
view all comments.
_
mickschumacher just posted a story!
y/n just posted a story!
liked by mickschumacher, estebanocon, francisca.cgomes and 240 103 others.
y/n: say hi to mickey <3
_
fan1: YOURE SO BEAUTIFUL OMG
fan2: mick is one lucky mf
fan3: they’re going to break up in a month mark my words
fan4: i’m literally heartbroken rn
fan5: my new parents
fan6: girlie run they’re coming for you
francisca.cgomes: cuties
liked by y/n.
fan7: they compliment each other so well tho
mickschumacher: hi pretty lady
liked by y/n.
fan8: mick i hope you can fight bc your girlfriend is GORG
fan9: the pictures are so cute omg
fan10: the mick girlies already crying in the comments
fan11: he hid her so well wdym he had a whole gf this entire time?
fan12: i’m so happy for him qjjabakzlzm
fan13: thanks for your service y/n, we now have tons of pictures of bf material mick
y/n: 🫡
fan14: the BIG ASS hickey in the first picture wtf
fan15: ew you can tell she’s classless
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liked by mickschumacher, lilymhe, carmenmundt and 192 023 others.
y/n: my camera roll is full of cats we met on the street and mickey
_
carmenmundt: ♥️
fan1: their vibe is so chill, they really match each other
fan2: i’m a lil sad that mick is dating someone but she seems nice
estebanocon: i see two owls in that pic
fan3: nooooo they’re so cute
fan4: she’s getting so much hate on twitter but she’s just minding her business??
fan5: WHORE
fan6: don’t worry guys she won’t last till the end of the season 🤭
fan7: the obsession y’all have with random men who don’t even know y’all exist is insane
fan8: so CUTE
fan9: i bet mick paid for everything lmao
mickschumacher: she actually paid the whole trip, i’m just her sugar baby
fan10: JAKQOSPSPPSPSOS BRO
fan11: and that’s how you clap back at haters, guys
fan12: if only others drivers were defending their gfs like mick is defending y/n
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liked by mickschumacher, estebanocon, luisinhaoliveira99 and 501 019 others.
y/n: ‘cars outside’ is out :)
_
fan1: not it being a love song for mick :(
fan2: WHY am i crying hysterically about two adults being in love
fan3: "oh darling, all of the city lights, never shine as bright as your eyes." GOD
mickschumacher: why did i do to deserve you?
fan4: they’re so in love it’s almost disgusting
fan5: esteban will have to third wheel now lmao
estebanocon: i’ve been third wheeling for a year now
fan6: A YEAR???
fan7: THEY’VE BEEN TOGETHER FOR A YEAR??
fan8: a year like 365 days? damn schumacher
fan9: nah but hiding a whole gf for a year when you have crazy groupies up your ass every single day is insane
fan10: the cutest couple if you ask me
fan11: i just fell to my knees
fan12: WHEN IS IT MY TURN GODDAMNIT
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taglist: @ferrariloverr
#f1 fandom#f1 au#f1 fanfic#f1 fic#f1 imagine#f1 instagram au#f1 social media au#f1 x oc#f1 x reader#f1 x you#mick schumacher#mick shumacher imagine#mick schumacher x you#mick schumacher x reader#formula one x reader#formula one#formula one x you#formula one x y/n#formula 1
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✧.* 𝑴𝑨𝑻𝑻𝑯𝑬𝑶 𝑹𝑰𝑫𝑫𝑳𝑬 𝑵𝑺𝑭𝑾 𝑯𝑬𝑨𝑫𝑪𝑨𝑵𝑶𝑵
[ aftercare ] ― he would cuddle you right after and clean you up depending on the mess you two made. I can also imagine him smoking a cigarette next to you If you‘re okay with that and If not he would cuddle you for a while and then stand up to smoke at the window – then coming back for cuddles ofc
[ body part ] ― he is a ass type of man to me. Always has a hand near your booty but also your face ? Like his hands would always stroke your cheeks and he would leave kisses all over it - oh and ofc he LOVES your pussy
[ cum ] ― he‘d go NUTS seeing you covered in it, marking you as his
[ desires ] ― He would go crazy for any kind of sort of begging from you - hearing your whiny voice begging him to do the filthy things to you he loves so much. Teasing him would also he a big turn on for him. Bending over things, accidently brushing your hand over his thigh near his dick
[ experience ] ― HONESTLY i know most of us like to think he‘s experienced and knows what he‘s doing bc he had mich sex before BUT I think a lot of girls would be terrified of him being the dark lord‘s son. So yes he is a natural and knows just what feels good, studying your reactions to his touch all night long but he would not have that much experience
[ first time ] ― Like i said he wouldn‘t sleep around that much so maybe it‘s with his first girlfriend or situationship he has with a girl he likes
[ grooming ] ― he wouldn‘t be very picky about how you groom as long as it‘s not completely out of control - he himself would make sure it‘s always clean and trimmed ? Idk man i never thought of that
[ horny ] Mattheo is a horndog 100%. And she wouldn’t even have to try since he would get a boner from almost everything she does. I think physical touch would be important to him since he never got much of it and also wants to try so much with you so he can win more experience to please you even better.
[ intimacy ] — Depends on what you like - he‘s a pleaser in my head so If you would want soft he would prepper you in kisses and praising words "you‘re doing so good baby i love you so much." but If you‘d like it rough he would dirty talk to you until your eyes roll back and manhandle you "fuck baby you feel my cock inside your belly? M' gonna fuck every other thought out of your head."
[ joker ] ― he could laugh when slmething clumsy happens but otherwise he‘d be more on the serious/passionate side
[ kinks ] ― Mattheo loves seeing u begging as i said but also is into you calling him daddy or sir, anything that makes him feel powerful. A kink he didn‘t know he had was his being sub. It didn‘t happen that often but he‘d enjoy it so much after like a rough week - you taking care of him and not judging but loving his little whimpers - also a little orgasm denial on you
[ locations ] ― literally anywhere - he would not give a single fuck If someone saw you two fucking as long as he can shield or hide your naked body - but If it would he a quiecky with him just sliding under your skirt he would love the drill of being caught and claiming you as his for other‘s
[ masturbation ] ― he‘s a horndog + single? Then he‘d masturbate quiete a lot but when he finally got you, he didn‘t need to anymore
[ no go ] ― anything that has to do with other people - he‘d be way too possessive and jealous for including someone else into your sexlife
[ oral ] ― MUNCH MUNCH MUNCH you cannot tell me otherwise! He would get drunk on your pussy, eating it out for hours sometimes. But he also enjoys getting sucked off by you too
[ positions ] ― he loves seeing your face twist in pleasure and your little gasps for air when he fucks into you. so anything like fucking you from behind but in front of a mirror or you riding him and trying your best bouncing up and down on him would do it for him - but I also think when the two if you argue and fuck he would push your face into a pillow while grabbing your hips from behind so you would shut up
[ quickies ] ― he‘d love them cause that means he get‘s extra sex in between classes, before quidditch training or studying
[ rounds ] ― i think his stanima is good like 2-3 long rounds before he would have to take his first break. Either he would smoke a cigarette or eat you out in the meantime
[ secrets ] ― he doesn‘t have real secrets since he‘s really comfortable with you
[ toys ] ― he would be confused when he first caught you with one - poor voy thinking you don‘t enjoy his cock but after you explain it to him he would use it here and there on you vut mostly just when he try‘s teasing and edging you
[ underwear ] ― he LOVES when you wear red for him, not caring what kind of underwear as long as it‘s red. He‘d also almost come directly in his pants when he notice you don‘t wear any under your skirt but would punish you still
[ volume ] ― Mattheo loves your loud moans and screams of his name, he would praise you so much for it and just gets drunk on your little whimpers for him - mattheo would also be quiete vocal always dirty talking to you or groaning at how tight you feel around him
[ watch ] ― he would never let anyone watch you - not even over his dead body but like i said before when you have clothes on and he slips under your skirt he‘d enjoy someone catching you two
[ xxx ] ― would only watch when he‘s single but even then not that often
[ yearning ] ― he would be the biggest tease ever! Stroking your inner thigh under the table in class or at dinner. He‘d tease you by whispering all the things he wants to do to you in your ear while all your friends are around, slowly brushing his hands over your clothes pussy when nobody‘s looking
[ zzz ] ― usually depends on his day. If he had quidditch training or was awake all night then he‘d be tired after it but otherwise he‘d kind of get his energy from fucking you
you do not have to agree on that – remeber he‘s fictional and that‘s MY opinion 🫶🏻
here‘s my masterlist If you wanna read more <3
taglist: @justarandomcanadiantransdude @sofa-couch26 @helendeath @thatonepansexual2000 @imabee-oralizard @supernaturaldawning @little-miss-naill @kolsangel @itsarajr @jolly4holly @hisparentsgallerryy @slytherinscreamqueen @mixvchelle @littlemadamred @ummmmmmm-username @jeannie-beannie @belle-blue @izriddle @kr-1-sta @sagetakami
xoxo sarah <3
#sub mattheo riddle#mattheo riddle masterlist#mattheo riddle blurb#mattheo riddle x you#mattheo riddle headcanon#mattheo riddle fluff#mattheo riddle imagine#mattheo riddle x reader#mattheo riddle#mattheo riddle smut#slytherin boys fluff#slytherin boys smut#slytherin boys x reader#slytherin boys imagine#slytherin boys headcanons
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instagram official | blake hughes au
blake hughes masterlist
blake.hughes
liked by nicohischier, jackhughes, trevorzegras, and others
blake.hughes life lately :)
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jackhughes suit jacket looks a lil familiar...🧐
blake.hughes oh really?😁
nicohischier whoevers jacket it is has really nice taste!
liked by blake.hughes
trevorzegras 🤭🤭
user00 wtf are u giggling about?
blake.hughes wait trev do u know?
trevorzegras yea jack called a mandatory ft a few days ago
blake.hughes omfg??
trevorzegras im happy for u goldie!
user01 BLAKE WATCH OUT!!! THERES A MAN BESIDE U!!
user02 blakes got a bf? omg im so happy for her
user03 monroes the cutest cat omfg
user04 wait can we acknowledge trevor calling blake goldie? what is that
user05 its been a thing for awhile now! he started calling her goldie after she won olympic gold! he mentioned it in an interview or something i think
user04 NICO NICO NICO
nicohischier
liked by blake.hughes, john.marino97, trevorzegras, and others
nicohischier Happy Holidays!😈❤️
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jackhughes 🔥🔥
blake.hughes 😈
user09 using the "😈" when soft launching ur teammates sister is crazy
user10 waittt who's he dating?
user09 streets are saying hes dating blake hughes! she recently posted a soft launch AND she was caught liking thirst edits of him😭
user10 oh theyre so unserious😭😭
comments on this post is limited
blake.hughes added to their story !
nicohischier posted one minute ago!
liked by jackhughes, blake.hughes, lhughes_06, and others
nicohischier the best december :)
tagged: blake.hughes
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blake.hughes :)
blake.hughes you make me beyond happy
nicohischier Du bringst mich zum Lächeln❤️
jackhughes nice but was the last pic really necessary?
nicohischer my bad
lhughes_06 does this mean I get to call you dad now?
jackhughes no
_quinnhughes no
user17 BLAKE???????
user18 OMFG ITS CONFIRMED THEY BOTH POSTED
user18 at the same time too like thats soulmatism😭🙏
user19 nicos reply in german... im gonna kms theyre so cute wtf😭
blake.hughes posted 1 minute ago!
liked by nicohischier, _quinnhughes, trevorzegras and others
blake.hughes my nico<3
tagged: nicohischier
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jackhughes … yours🤨
jackhughes pretty sure he was mine first bud
blake.hughes right but out of the two of us, who does he spend his nights with?
jackhughes WOAH?????
trevorzegras i think he’s ALL of ours
jackhughes no
blake.hughes no
nicohischier my girl❤️
trevorzegras 👽🍿
blake.hughes ok
_quinnhughes FINALLY🙏
jackhughes ?
_quinnhughes i’ve been waited for MONTHS for them to go ig official you don’t understand
jackhughes how tf did you find out so soon? Dawson literally told me like 2 weeks ago
_quinnhughes I know everything.
jackhughes alright mr. “i don’t really consider myself someone who knows what’s going on”
_quinnhughes they probably could’ve made out in front of you and you still wouldn’t have realized… mr. “I didn’t know there was a city in New Jersey”
trevorzegras Trevor ZEGRAS🧡
user20 in every pic of blake and nico hes always touching her in some way... like he loves her so bad they are my parents
user21 THE WAY BLAKE LOOKS AT NICO IM GOING TO JUMP OFF A BRIDGE THEY LOOK SO IN LOVE
user22 oh to be a fly on the wall when jack found out about the news...
user23 bro was definitely pouting he has such intense middle child syndrome
user24 MY NICO... MY GIRL??? ?OHHH ITS SO OVER THEY'RE SO DAMN CUTE
user25 i'm so glad that blake is happy after everything that happened... she deserves it the most<33
user26 NICO AND BLAKE ARE FR DATING??? WHY WHY WHY WHY
user27 ? get serious
#blake hughes au#nico hischier fic#nico hischier x reader#nico hischier blurb#nico hischier imagine#jack hughes x reader#quinn hughes x reader#luke hughes x reader#trevor zegras x reader#nhl imagine#nhl fanfiction#nhl blurb#nhl fic
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Hi, Salem! I hope you’re doing well! Thank you so much for all of your works! 😊 I looove the way you write and how you’re able to capture the characters so well. It makes my day every time I see you post 😊 Would it be possible to request law x reader on their wedding day? Like would the two of them secretly meet up before the wedding (or sneak off in the middle of the celebrations) just to have a moment with each other away from the crazy? Are they doing a first look? Are there a lot of tears? Just some ideas but would love to see anything about what you think his x reader’s wedding day would be like! 🥹💕 Thank you so much and keep up the fantastic work!!
Hiya papaya bb!! I'm going to do this as more of a hc bc i do have some thoughts about Law that are more suited for that, so I hope I can do this justice for you!!
[Heads up!: fluff, lil bit of angst/touching on Law's past]
Law ㅡ marriage isn't really something that Law thinks about, point blank. Does he want to spend his life with you? Yes, but he doesn't think that it's necessary to get married. To him, it feels like if he starts thinking like that, he's slapping a target on your back. But that's in terms of pre-Dressrosa ㅡ post, when he's getting a little more used to thinking of what he wants now that he's gotten justice for Cora, he might entertain it a little more.
He's still incredibly wary about it though, because y'know, ex-Warlord and post Wano, he's got a really hefty bounty on his head. Not necessarily conducive to stopping somewhere to get married. And in terms of marriage, he also isn't a fan of anything extravagant, either.
No, he'd be more inclined for a quiet ceremony ㅡ and not necessarily with rings, either. If you want them, he'll do it ㅡ but he'd rather exchange hearts. A little daunting yes, but it means more to him in that then you have his heart on a literal scale ㅡ and he has yours.
If you agree to it, it also means that he's a lot more cautious when you get caught in confrontations. That heart beating in his chest isn't his, after all, it's yours ㅡ so he definitely makes note to not be so careless because the last thing he wants is something to happen to you.
And again, with the ceremony ㅡ it's a quiet, private one with just the crew, but that's okay. They're his family and yours too, and there honestly isn't anyone he trusts more than them.
Now speaking if at the end of all of this, when everything is said and done and he gets that happy ending ㅡ if you want something a little more traditional, he's more willing to go with it. Doesn't cry necessarily, but he's definitely only got eyes for you.
(Bluescreens in the best way possible when you call him your husband for the first time.)
Afterwards, when you're cuddled up to him, he thumbs at the ring on your hand with quiet awe. You're married to him, you're his ㅡ just as mich as he's yours. It makes him a little giddy every time he thinks about it ㅡ he's making the most of the life Cora gave his to allow him to have, and he gets to spend that life with you.
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PLEASE MAKE 2005 BILL HCS 🙏🏻🙇🏻♀️
I based this on the song Ich Bin Nich' Ich from their Schrei album so I hope you enjoy!
content warnings: bill being sad? 😭 lots of angst yk (which if you've been here for a while you'd know I actually LOVE writing angst) idk if this is considered toxic bc the way I've written it, it's very much filled with codependency to like a point where without a person youre suffering so 😬.
summary: bill misses you more than anything right now.
word count: 1.4k
a/n: for this fanfic, you're dating Bill at the time and have been for a little while, and it's set in like 2004/2005. I decided to do this bc Ich Bin Nich' Ich is literally my favorite song from Schrei sooo I can't wait to write this. I'm not sure if anybody else has done this so if they have please tell me! also, lmk if you want to be added to the tag list 💖💖
+ this is from bills perspective
Ich Bin Nich' Ich
meine augen schaun mich müde an und finden keinen trost
I laid down in my bed, my head pounding achingly from tonight's show. Sweat dripped down my forehead and rolled onto my pillow as I turned over. My shallow breathing was catching up to me and my eyes closed ever-so lightly. The cold pillow was a perfect embrace after the show tonight. Well—almost perfect.
My heart twinged with sadness as you came into my head. You always sat in the back of my head like a lingering melody, haunting and sweet. My mind never was able to get fully rid of you, especially now since we're on tour. Your soft and supple hands always seemed to fit perfectly in mine. You're glistening eyes, staring back at me and that enchanting smile that sat flawlessly upon your face. Nothing could ever pull me away from staring at you when we were together. Everything about you always made me feel like we were destined to be brought together, we fit so well with each other and our bodies seemed to always be pulling towards each other like magnets.
My fingernails dug into the bed sheets as I closed my eyes to "watch" you. Who cares if I couldn't see you right now, right? I could always close my eyes and watch the way your perfect body; your perfect everything, moved like the water as you glided through the air, running towards me whenever we would see each other again.
That wouldn't be for months, though..
The coldness of my pillow was fading as my body denied itself rest. I couldn't fall asleep with the sound of your angelic voice, whispering in my head. Which was ironic, because that voice was the same one that always helped me fall asleep on my hardest nights. Nothing right now could ever comfort me.. not unless you showed up.
I groaned in annoyance as a soft knock cracked against my door. Who needs to talk to me right now, it's 11 o' clock at night.
I pulled myself up off of my bed; the bedsheets lightly sticking to my skin from the sweat that once dripped from my body. Walking felt like trying to pull myself through quicksand, all I wanted to do was to see you. You see you—no, feel you jump into my arms and press your beautiful lips up against mine.
God, how amazing that would feel right now.
My body finally brought itself to the door and my hand slowly pulled it open to see a face I had known for quite some time.
"Tom?" I mumbled out, pressed my face into the tinted wall, "What are you doing up here?" I asked, my breath feeling heavy again.
"We're going to a party, are you coming or are you going to coop yourself up in your room again, for the nth time in a row." He spouted at me.
I rolled my eyes before telling him I'd be staying in my room again. He may have seemed a little agitated about that, but from the way he was looking at me, I think he could tell what was wrong. He always knew what was wrong.
"It's always obvious, your eyes tell us everything, Bill.." He would say to me every once in a while when I felt down. I guess I was never the one who was good at hiding my feelings, especially from my brother.
ich kann mich nich' mehr mit ansehen—bin ich los
alles was hier mal war—kann ich nich' mehr in mir finden
I forced myself into the bathroom, my hands gripping onto the sink in front of me as my eyes hesitated to look myself in the face. I'm sure I looked awful. Ever since I met you, I never felt like myself without you. You brought the me out of me. That's what I loved about you so much.
My eye makeup was smeared a bit and some of my mascara had run down my cheeks. I honestly looked like a mess. I blinked in the mirror, watching myself crumble. I needed you so badly. This was one of the hard nights, the hard nights when I really needed you.
The water i splashed upon my face dripped down my neck as my eyes slowly came upwards to look myself in the face.
I could never seem to see myself when you weren't with me, you always made me feel so much better. About everything and anything. I'm still not sure how you did it..
alles weg—wie im wahn, seh ich mich immer mehr verschwinden
My freshly dried face from a cotton towel felt stiff as tears rolled down my cheeks. My eyes stung with a fiery intensity that only someone as gracious and wonderful as you.
My body didn't seem like my own anymore as I crashed down against the soft, recently sweaty bed. Makeup smeared on the pillow as my cheek rested against it, staring over at the dimly lit; slightly sparky (?) lamp next to me. The curtains surrounding my room seemed to understand my awful being right now as I could feel more tears threatening to spill over my waterline, down my face.
I could almost swear this was an out of body experience, maybe I was just tired. Everything around me felt like a dream and I could feel myself slipping away. My body, my dreams, my everything. Nothing felt real anymore. Not when I'm away from you.
ich bin nich' ich wenn du nich' bei mir bist—bin ich allein
und das was jetzt noch von mir übrig ist...
My breath was caught in my throat as more memories of you poured into my head.
××× I remember the first time I saw you—
Walking outside the studio while everybody else finished up inside, the cold wind blowing in my face, brushing my hardened bangs to the side. My teeth lightly chattered as you flowed by me. I could swear you were an angel.
From your angelic face, to your scent. You were absolutely perfect and I was infatuated with you. I remember thinking someone like you would never go for someone like me.. right?
How happy I was when I figured out I was wrong.
From the way you held yourself to your laughter to your strength. You were everything I was looking for and more. How could I stumble upon love so quickly? How was I so lucky to have you enthralled with me.
You had never even heard of my band yet, you weren't a crazy, obsessed fan girl. You weren't someone looking for a one night stand or someone who wanted fame by association. You were so beautiful and real and absolutely raw. I still don't understand sometimes why you chose me, but I'm so glad you did.
×××
but here... without you. I feel as though I've lost a part of me. Like I'm not me when I'm not with you. I don't feel whole and I don't think I will until we've been reunited.
××× you're bright red, slushy red tongue seemed to gawk at my blue one as we laughed. I laid my around around you as we walked through the park. I finally had a day off from rehearsing and playing live shows, to hang out with you.
I swear my heart was going to explode out of my chest just from staring down into your beautiful eyes. The way you were staring up at me—i don't think I had ever loved somebody so much. You were my true "everything".
××× your warm breath, slowly yet calmly blowing against my neck as you fell into a deep slumber was probably one of the most relaxing things I could ever dream of. My arms were wrapped around you as the TV quietly played in the background. My body had never felt so amazing. And now with you—you just made everything so much better.
My hands glided into your hair as you snuggled closer into me. With the warm air surrounding us and the soft hum of the noise around us. Everything seemed absolutely perfect.
How could I live without you?
will ich nich' sein
draußen hängt der himmel schief
und an der Wand dein abschiedsbrief
ich bin nich' ich wenn du nich' bei mir bist—bin ich allein
I slowly closed my eyes, my body finally relaxing. Ever-so slightly, at least. We'd be together again soon, I'm not sure why tonight was so hard for me, to be without you.. but I cannot wait to see your sparkling beauty staring back at me when we come together again. I don't feel like myself right now, but hopefully with time, you will bring that back to me...
sorry this isn't longer 😭 I hope you guys enjoyed this though! also here are the English translations for the lyrics. They're pretty accurate, but some stuff may be a little off 😞
translations:
one: My eyes show off all of my sadness, and find no comfort here.
two: I can't face myself anymore, I'm not me.
three: Everything that was here, I cannot find myself inside me.
four: Swept away like a dream, I see myself vanish more and more.
five: I'm not myself when you're not, not with me, i'm all alone.
six: And everything that is still left of me.
seven: I don't want to be outside the heavens hang a slope and on the wall your farewell note. I'm not myself when you're not, not with me, I'm alone.
also this isn't proofread, so if there are any mistakes sorry!!
taglist: none yet
#tokio hotel#bill kaulitz#tokio hotel x reader#tokio hotel bill kaulitz#bill kaulitz fanfic#2005 bill kaulitz#bill kaulitz angst#tokio hotel fanfics#tokio hotel angst
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Colin Thewes and the Issue of not Being Able to Kiss his Best Friend.
— how Colin doesn’t know the difference between love and friendship until he does and how that could also mean something entirely different in terms of how he is attracted to people
This is basically just me getting proof for that one headcanon I have. Feel very free to disagree but this is just the way I personally view it because of my own personal feelings about this topic. Thank you very much and let’s unpack it from the start:
1. The Issue of the Kiss
So we are introduced to Colin as Julias counterpart, as her best friend and we get to know how deep their friendship runs, how they are able to play parts with each other, be silly with each other, etc. At the heart of their friendship in Season 25 is also them playing roles in the Theater Modul and playing lovers who eventually have to kiss. Julia seems fine with that, she is a born actress but suddenly Colins acting seems to lack, at the prospect of having to kiss his best friend. What’s up with that? The thing is, Colin himself doesn’t seem to know why he has such problems with kissing Julia. Why is kissing such a big deal to him if everyone around him manages to be fine with it?
Some might now argue that the kissing issue stems from the fact that they actually have some unresolved feelings for each other but! This theory is entirely brought up through Reena who basically tells Colin that the only reason he is afraid of the kiss is because he is in love with his best friend. And he actually denies that.
“Weils ja so unvorstellbar ist, dass man sich in mich verlieben könnte.” Is that some issue with love I hear Colin having? This is probably one of our only signs that even if Colin seems very passionate about love, he is still insecure about it. Perhaps because he has this underlying fear of being unlovable, he ends up constantly falling for people who already love him in a certain way. I mean, Julia is his best friend, so surely she loves him and Noah trusts him and that’s a form of love too, no? Perhaps Colin needs this layer of trust first, the security that someone already knows parts of him before romantic love sets in.
“Willst du nicht lieber bei deinem 1.Kuss jemanden küssen, in den du wirklich verliebt bist?” Here we get proof that a kiss isn’t just a kiss to Colin. He actually seems to not understand kissing someone just for the sake of kissing and not for the sake of actually loving them. Because to him, it seems like kissing isn’t just something friends do or people at Flaschendrehen have no problem brushing over. To Colin, a kiss seems to mean a million more things and he actually has to be in love first in order to be able to kiss someone.
2. The Line between Love and Friendship and Colins Unawareness of it
“Keine Schmetterlinge im Bauch. Ich hatte mir den ersten Kuss anders vorgestellt, aber naja.” So Colin actually does have expectations when it comes to love and very stereotypical ones at that. When he thinks of romantic actions, he thinks you’re supposed to have this warm fluttery feeling inside your chest, the butterflies, the heart beats, etc.
“Was ist, wenn wir uns nicht nur mögen, sondern auch lieben?” - “Bei Freundschaft liebt man sich doch auch.” Colin seems to have a few little issues when it comes to differentiating love and friendship or better, the love he has for his friends versus the love he could possibly have for a romantic partner. How will he know if he actually loves Julia or if that’s just friendship?
And he doesn’t know until they literally get into a relationship and the issue of acting as a couple arises.
3. And when romance comes, love ends.
Their cinema date doesn’t go as planned but it’s kinda destined to fail from the start as Colin watches another couple kiss and be all cuddly and when he looks back at his best friend, or better girlfriend, he can’t picture them like that. And even when he tries to be romantic, it ends up failing because it doesn’t feel right. This is him slowly realizing that perhaps he mixed up romantic love and platonic love because it all felt kinda the same to him in the beginning and surely if Julia loves him like that, he must like her like that too, right?
“Deine Freundin sitzt direkt neben dir. Fällt dir da nichts Romantisches ein?” No. Colin knows plenty about romance, he knows about the butterflies in your stomach and that you should cuddle and kiss on your first date. He knows the starry sky is romantic. Colin doesn’t have an issue with defining what romance is. He has an issue finding something romantic about Julia.
And it sounds harsh but he has all these expectations about how romance should be and how love should evolve and he feels none of it when he looks at his best friend. Because that’s all she is to him; his best friend. Even when at the start, it seemed so easy to blur the lines between love and friendship, Colin slowly started to realize that what he thought was love, was nothing more than friendship and perhaps the appreciation of being loved.
4. Enter Noah
And then Noah comes in Season 26 and everything is different except nothing really is. Colin makes a friend, warms up to a dog and without realizing, ends up falling in love. Because this time we don’t get any second guesses, we don’t get the fear of separation, we don’t get the talking about feelings. No, we get Colin kissing Noah because he feels like it. We get Colin asking Noah to go to the cinema with him and the very next day, he is already asking to go again because this time, the cinema felt right. (Perhaps because he went there with different expectations than when he did with Julia but guys, the underlying message please!)
“Der Kuss hat mir echt was bedeutet” because Colin doesn’t kiss people unless it means something, because he said he would much prefer to kiss someone he actually likes in a romantic way than simply kiss for the fun or the experience of it.
And Noah makes him see that he does know the difference between romantic love and platonic love, the difference between romance and friendship.
It’s just a bit hard to tell for him but he got there in the end eventually, with the right person.
To sum up the points of this piece:
A kiss is more than just a kiss to Colin
He has a hard time figuring out if he is in love or if it’s just friendship
Because his friendships mean more to him than any romantic relationship ever could
He has high stereotypical expectations for love
This is all a bit messily written and explained, I apologize for that but all we know about love in relation to Colin is that the two times he could see himself in love was with the people he was closest to at that moment. Even when he goes on that date with the guy from the Challenge thingy it doesn’t end up feeling right because he doesn’t know him yet, because there isn’t the same layer of trust that Colin and Julia have or Colin and Noah. And he gets really hung up on love and how once he is able to tell the difference between romance and friendship, he is actually very unable to go back to just being friends because love does mean this much to him and he brings it up plenty of times because it has this very deep meaning for him. Because Colin doesn’t just fall in love with anyone, he couldn’t even properly fall in love with his best friend even if she was the person he trusted most because that was what love was supposed to be all about, no? About trust and knowing each other and still it doesn’t work out.
In Conclusion:
#schloss einstein#colin thewes#this is just a headcanon i've had since s26 no one take this too serious thank you so much#colin and i are too similar might just add one more thing to the list
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With the homies
Luke Hughes x college vlogger!reader
Series masterlist
yourusername
liked by adamfantilli, user90 & others
Yourusername my love language is coffee shop dates 🫶
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Dylanduke.25 love you a latte!
Yourusername you just get me Dyl 🫶
Luca.fantilli so if I bring you coffee can we call it a date?
Yourusername sure Lu
Adamfantilli Luca’s getting a death glare now
Rutgermcgroarty oh yeah, he’s dead
User83 ranking AA coffee shops vid?
User62 Yes!! Would love to know
Yourusername oh, I like that. It’s an area I’m very familiar with
sholtz_024 doing schoolwork on a date? He must not be that interesting
Yourusername nah, he’s pretty cool & he feeds me so 👍
Yourusername
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Yourusername quick visit to Bestie at smart kid school!
Vlog coming tomorrow! #suphomies&wecomeback
📍NYC
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Bestie fun was had, smarts weren’t used
Yourusername true
Friend4 aint that the truth
Friend9 wild weekend!
Jackhughes you were in NYC?!
Yourusername yes
Jackhughes and you didn’t tell me?
Yourusername why would I
sholtz_024 you say that as if you aren’t crazy smart too
Yourusername yeah, but I’m not Columbia smart
sholtz_024 I’m pretty sure you are
Yourusername no, I’m literally not. They rejected me
User84 Mich is better anyway!!
yourusername hell yeah it is
jacobtruscott_20 concrete jungle wet dream tomato
Edwards.73 There’s nothing you can’t do
Dylanduke.25 now youre in New York
mackie.samo these streets will make you
Markestapa feel brand new
lhughes_06 big lights will inspire you
Pplapointe_22 lets hear it for New York!
Yourusername can y’all do karaoke somewhere else?
Dylanduke.25 rude
User83 new tattoo?
Yourusername gotta get the matching ones <3
User02 how many do you have?
Yourusername this makes 10!
User83 tattoo tour?
Yourusername maybe!
lhughes_06
liked by yourusername, markestapa & others
lhughes_06 with the boys
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User939 and a mystery girl👀
Edwards.73 what a stud
thombordeleau_ he’s got rizz
Markestapa hey thats my line!!
Dylanduke.25 swaggy swag
JackHughes Luke being a gentleman?
_quinnhughes I taught him well
nolan_moyle how sauced are you?
lhughes_06 yes
mackie.samo there’s your answer
yourusername is that hat surgically attached to Duker head or something?
dylanduke.25 I just like it okay?!
yourusername
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Yourusername the week vs the weekend
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sholtz_024 dont be fooled its Saturday night & she’s been camped out at the library since this morning
Yourusername I like to pretend I’m cool okay?
lhughes_06 dont lie, you’re normally at the arena
Yourusername okay well this is a typical non game week Hughes okay?
Bestie study hard, party harder
Friend7 retweet
Yourusername thats right baby!
BigBro are you wearing pants in that pic?
Yourusername yes 🙄 ever heard of shorts?
BigBro you do know its March?
Yourusername its for the aesthetic bro
User03 show us his face bestie
Yourusername its sholtz_024
sholtz_024 dont bring me into this!
xxx
#luke hughes x reader#luke hughes#vlogger!reader#jjs insta edits#umich hockey#umich imagine#hockey instagram au#michigan#sup homies!
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Summer
Liked by y/nhughes, tzegras and others
elhughes: all my kids back together (ft. the non-biologicals)
tagged: quinnhughes, y/nhughes, jackhughes and lhughes
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colecaufield: glad to be back mama hughes
y/nhughes: Love you mama bear 💕
elhughes: Love you too baby bear ❤️
yourbestie: one minute you've moved to NJ then you come back to Mich for the summer. Bruh 😒
y/nhughes: bro you're literally here with me. Don't complain too much
jackhughes: there is always something to complain about when it comes to you to being together
colecaufield: jackhughes I'd being sleeping with one eye open over the summer buddy 🫣
lhughes: Q with the ugly-ass glasses. Matches him perfectly
jimhughes: Why did they all have to come
y/nhughes: you love usssss 🥰
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quinnhughes: Double Trouble back together 😈
tagged: y/nhughes
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y/nhughes: look out Mich 💅🏻
yourbestie: God you're hot
y/nhughes: I need you to clarify which twin you're talking about please. And you better pray to god you answer correctly 👏🏻
user: Quinn is looking fineeeee
user: Can't she just go to Vancouver after the summer. I don't want Huggy alone 🥺
bradytkachuk: Chill Bonnie and Clyde
user: I don't think Brady knows his true crime
y/nhughes: Em hasn't taught you that well it seems bradytkachuk. Do some research next time please 🫢
lhughes: where is my photo creds?
quinnhughes: 🤠
user: y/nhughes is actually so cute
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y/nhughes: \\Summer 23//
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yourbestie: Peep that last pic. Soft launching 🙄
y/nhughes: still single babyyyy
yourbestie: not for long 👀
quinnhughes: wtf is going on here?!
tzegras: that's a lovely picture of me you posted
user: Is that Trevor, Jack and Cole?!
y/nhughes: Indeed. Drunk beach walks are fun!
user: I see why Quinn and Jack call y/n the menace
lhughes: Why does no-one in this family give me photo cred?!
y/nhughes: clout chaser 🙄
lhughes: uh you literally have less followers than me
y/nhughes: check again moosey. The devs post boosted me just a tad
user: that it did 💅🏻
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nicohischier: Off-season is finally here ☀️
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jackhughes: worked hard now hardly working
nicohischier: still working out though
y/nhughes: nerdddd 🤓
user: thank you for gifting us this picture
user: who took it though?
jbratt: boy oh boy this will be a fun off-season
timomeier: 😈
user: That doesn't look like Switzerland
njdevils: oh captain my captain 🥵
user: just random but does y/nhughes have access to the devs insta? That's a very her comment
user: unsure... she's only just been hired so doubt it
user: and suddenly the devs are thirsty
y/nhughes: was not me but can't wait to work with whoever did 🫢🫡
#nico hischier imagine#nico hischier x reader#nico hischier fic#nico hischier#new jersey devils imagine#social media imagines#swissboyhisch social media fics#swissboyhisch imagine#swissboyhisch
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The Ackerbond (Shorts 1): The End and The Beginning
Pairing: Canon!Levi x F!Reader
Warnings: none i don't think, just heavy grief and drinking
A/N: uh... hey. i'm back :3
once again as always thank you @peace-for-levi for beta-reading for me. my literal knight in shining armour when it comes to these :3 love you boo
Taglist: @levmada @awesomeness1679 @purplecandygerl @iam-the-villain-of-this-story @pluvio-pluto @midnightbarnes97 @aresclouds @imkumichan @xxpadfootxx @cmjh3 @justa19 @notgoodforlife @leviackermanmyhero245 @kaea-peverall @jakillski @macaronnv @acker-night @oldtownwonderland @snailsposts @lunardeiity @clusiesuzie @hi-imkaiya @isabellawigginss @ackermandick @orionsalos @disaster-writer @temariskadi @nariko1989 @elizaack @dixie-chick @death-by-bullseye @leviackermanst @poisonpeche @arcticcashew @feelingsandemotionsnotexplored @littleagxs @wall-maria-fritz @mal-writes
It wasn’t like you to doubt your captain. He’d never lead you astray this far. Sure, he was a fan of taking risks that always seemed to pay off in the end, and his gambles always seemed thoughtless at first (until you realised his long game) but this seemed a little extreme. You tailed him as he strode to the courtyard, the rest of your squad too following behind. He looked formidable in front of you. Captain Erwin Smith. The confirmed next Commander of the Scouts.
Whenever Shadis decided to throw in the towel anyway.
You’d never once questioned him in his gambles, always putting your complete faith in his decisions. But dragging renowned criminals up from the bowels of the Underground City and trying to force them into a military career they had no choice in… that was bold, even for him.
The glare of sunlight made you squint as stone greeted your boots, apprehensive expressions and concerned muttering littered the square. Nobody really knew what was going on, or why it was happening. Only that there would be some unexpected new blood.
It was only Hange who seemed unreasonably excited, waving you over the moment you were at ease. You crossed quickly, glancing around to see if you could spot the newcomers. Moblit, as per usual, seemed utterly beside himself with worry. Nifa, too, was chewing on her nails. You assumed Nanaba was off somewhere being wooed by Miche.
As per usual.
“Woah, what’s with the stress Nifa? I can fucking smell it radiating off you,” you commented.
Hange instantly throwing their arm around your shoulders as you stood with the little group. “Been taking lessons from Miche?” She quipped back weakly, her nerves getting the better of her.
You would almost pity the girl if her stress made sense.
“Did you not hear the rumours? They’re criminals. From the Underground! Why aren’t you stressed?” She squeaked, eyes darting like a scared animal.
“Hange doesn’t seem to be worried.” You pointed out your friend who seemed almost drunk off excitement.
“Worried?! How could anyone be worried? This is the most exciting thing that’s happened in MONTHS! Fresh meat, street meat at that. Who wouldn’t be excited?!”
“I think calling them ‘street meat’ is a surefire way to get yourself stabbed…” you said sceptically, folding your arms as Hange started to shake your shoulders, unable to control themselves.
“Hange please…”
You’d never seen her companion look so tired. Poor Moblit, he didn’t exactly have the easiest job. Hange was notorious for running experiments, with or without the Commander’s permission. Everytime they were caught, they’d claim it was ‘for science!’ and to ‘advance humanity!’ Naturally, your captain condoned her work. But this just added more stress on Moblit’s shoulders.
“Stand there and don’t do anything.” Your group whirled to the raised platform at the sound of Commander Shadis’ voice, Hange’s eyes popping out their head as the three newcomers lined up. Two of them looked happy to be there. The other one looked like he wanted to be anywhere else but there.
“Oh shit, that’s them,” you muttered, eyeing them each individually. Glancing back to your friends, you swore Nifa looked like she was about to faint. Moblit’s eyes were predictably on Hange, who you swore was fucking drooling.
“You’re so fucking weird, Hans– no. don’t wave! What the fuck are you do– oh my Walls!” You gave up trying to fight their hands down, instead pinching your brow in utter embarrassment. You heard a familiar cackle from behind you.
“The fuck are you doing, Hange?”
You were saved by Nanaba sauntering over with Miche in tow. You didn’t even want to know what they’d been up to before coming here. Though you were surprised when Miche split off to talk to Erwin.
“Making us all look fucking weird in association to them, how’s your morning going?”
“Oh, you know, each day that passes brings me closer to death.”
“A ball of sunshine, truly.” You snorted as she came to stand next to you. You’d avoided looking back to the trio on the platform, desperate to keep some of your dignity, but it was unavoidable now.
Oh, how you fucking wished it was still avoidable. “Great. They’re all looking. Hange, the middle one’s actually fucking sneering, would you cut it out?” You clipped them across the back of their head, Nanaba barking a laugh behind you. For once, Hange actually listened, and dropped their hands.
“He’s not sneering, he’s smiling. Look!”
“I’m surprised there’s a girl to be honest.” It was the first time Moblit had spoken properly, and you almost wanted to slap him.
“What, because dangerous criminals can’t be women?” You asked, more than ready to start a fist fight. But he looked instantly apologetic, frantically waving his hands in front of him.
“No, no, no, that’s not what I meant at all! It’s just, well, most women tend to become escorts or prostitutes just to make money. They have nothing to sell, so they sell their bodies to survive. In fact, most of them don’t survive. There’s no form of abortions or preventative teas down there, so most either die in childbirth since they’re too weak, or their bodies never recover and they die from diseases.
“Not only that, but most paying customers won’t go for a pregnant woman, or a woman who’s just given birth, so starvation is also one of the main causes of death for women in the… uh, Underground.” Moblit turned a bright red as he noticed the entire group had fallen silent, stares of horrified bafflement all turned to him.
“I have so many questions right now,” Nanaba commented, confused.
“Yeah, the first one being how the fuck you know all this?” you asked, completely in awe of his knowledge.
“I, uh– did some research for Erwin before he started his mission. Looked into living conditions, economy, stock markets, that sort of thing. Unfortunately, in brothels, women are classed as stock.”
“That’s fucking awful. Why doesn’t the King do anything about this?” You’d never been more horrified. Seeing your first titan was nothing in comparison to hearing this. Your mouth dropped open, even Hange looked a little downtrodden.
“Not sure. Overpopulation?” Moblit offered meekly, still trying to calm his burning ears from his previous embarrassment.
You huffed, turning back to look at the three on the platform. “Well, at least she managed to escape it. Hopefully her life will be better up here.” To your surprise, the young girl actually turned her head to look at you, her lips cracking up in a beaming grin. Her smile was infectious, and you found yourself grinning back.
“Wow. Already made a friend.” Hange nudged you with their elbow.
“I will hang you from the wall by the strap of your fucking glasses, I swear–”
“All soldiers line up!” You were rudely interrupted by the Section Commander onstage and the instant bustle of movement.
“Finish your threat later!” Hange called as you walked away from their line to find your own. Unable to muster a good response over the kerfuffle, you simply flipped them off as you walked away, earning yourself a look of disapproval from Erwin.
“Hange.” Seemed to be all the explanation he needed to understand with a quiet ‘ah’ as you took up your position in the line.
Your eyes fell to the newcomers, instantly caught off guard by the middle one borderline glaring at you. You straightened yourself up and glared right back, a silent battle of wills commencing as the soldier onstage addressed the ranks. He raised a thin brow, you followed suit. He set his jaw, yours tensed just as much. It was only when he went to introduce himself did he finally look away, almost rolling his eyes.
“Levi.”
At least his introduction was short. You had to physically refrain from making an internal joke about his height.
“Squad Leader Flagon! You will be taking on these three as part of your own squad, thus you will show them to their barracks and commence their training instantly.”
You internally cringed. Why, the fuck, did Shadis and Erwin think that Flagon would be the best fit for these three. Surely anyone else would be better suited. Why didn’t Erwin fucking take them on and make them a part of your squad?
His decisions really did make no sense sometimes.
“Sir!” Flagon saluted, though you could tell by the clench of his fist behind his back, he wasn’t exactly thrilled. Hange, on the other hand, couldn’t have looked more excited. These poor criminals had no idea what they were walking into. Turns out they were in more danger here then they were down there, with Hange on the prowl.
“Soldiers dismissed!” You saluted in unison with the rest of the courtyard, most making any excuse to leave instantly after the dismissal.
“Sooooooo? Whaddya think?!” Hange sidled up to you, Nanaba and Nifa chatting to each other as they, too, made their way over. You threw a glance back to the trio currently being talked at by Flagon. None of them looked engaged. The girl kept looking around with an excited smile; Isabel was her name. Farlan, the taller guy, kept trying to hold a conversation with the Squad Leader, but it very much looked like a half-hearted attempt. And Levi, once again, looked like he wanted to be anywhere but here.
“I mean, they look like soldiers enough. Though isn’t Isabel a bit young? She only looks twelve,” you murmured, a little worried they’d allowed a child to join the Scout Regiment. The moment you turned away, you felt holes in the back of your head, and you snapped back to see Levi glaring at you. Again. “Not entirely sure what his problem is though…” You shivered despite yourself.
“Awww, maybe he’s just got a crush!” You snorted in disbelief.
“Hange, that is not the look of somebody who has a crush. That’s the look of somebody who would like to see my blood dyeing his fucking curtains.”
Oh, he could absolutely hear you. Though, you didn’t know if that was a bad thing. In a split second he looked a little taken aback, searching your face, before looking away back to the conversation.
“Now look at what you’ve done. You’ve upset him!” Hange lamented, just as Nanaba and Nifa joined the two of you.
“Think it might take more than that to upset the most notorious criminals of the Underground City since Kenny the Ripper,” Nanaba flattened, giving Hange a look of disdain before glancing back at the new trio. “Honestly? I don’t trust them. Fucking criminals? The hell was Erwin thinking? Whoever rooms with them is gonna wind up dead!”
Looking at them? You doubted that. One was just a kid. Younger than every new cadet in the corps. The other, Farlan, looked pleasant enough. Not unlike Erwin with his disarmingly charming smiles. But Levi?
Yeah, he could definitely kill someone in their sleep.
“Bit dramatic. don’t ya think? Two of them seem… I don’t think nice is the right word, but–”
“Less murderous than the other one?”
“Exactly!” You snapped your fingers to Hange, who sent you a wink. You looked back just as Flagon started to walk away, calling after the trio like dogs to heel. You snorted as the shorter one scoffed, never seeing somebody look so insulted in your life. You couldn’t blame him though. Flagon had that effect on people.
“We should probably get ready, Hange. Likelihood is Flagon’s gonna want his whole squad there training. Though I can’t say I’m looking forward to it,” Nifa sighed, nervously chewing on her cuticles. You had half a mind to slap her hand down from her lips.
“I. Am. Ecstatic! Oh, I cannot wait to see what these guys can do. You know, from what I’ve heard, they taught themselves everything! Like, the inner workings of the ODM gear, the blade mechanisms, and apparently they could even out manoeuvre some of the best Scouts. It was only thanks to Miche that the little one– oh, what was his name…”
“L–”
“Levi! Yes, that’s it, Levi. It was only thanks to Miche that Levi was actually caught. Honestly, I reckon once he saw his friends captured, he just gave up. Noble of him, no?”
Nanaba barked a laugh, waving her hand dismissively. “Noble? Sure, for a rat.”
Something primal flipped in you, your legs itching to be anywhere but here. You felt unreasonably angry at her for saying that. To the point where if you didn’t find an excuse to leave, you would likely end up slapping her across the face.
“I, uh, need a shit or… something. I’ll catch up with you guys later.” You didn’t spare them a parting glance as you left for the barracks, trying to calm your adrenaline.
You stopped dead upon hearing your name called from the men’s barracks, having only breezed past the door to get to your own room. You sighed heavily. That voice was Flagon’s. You knew it was. You could hear his infuriating tones from the training grounds.
You back tracked, popping your head round the doorframe.
“Sir?”
“Have you seen Nifa? Or Hange? I need one of them to take the girl to her room.”
“But I’ve already told you! I don’t wanna go to–”
“Quiet!”
You watched Isabel fold her arms petulantly, and you definitely put her age in the twelve to thirteen bracket.
“Uh, no I haven’t. Not since the courtyard,” you responded, staring at him blankly as he raised a brow of expectation. You looked around the room, confused before a sickly realisation dawned in your chest, and with a heavy sigh, you continued. “Sir.”
That seemed to stroke his ego enough. “Damnit, well I can’t go in there.”
You searched his face to see if he was being serious right now. Did he not notice what was standing right in front of him?
“Oh no, if only there was another woman around to take her to the women’s barracks,” you lamented sarcastically, flattening Flagon with a cold stare and just waiting for the message to sink in. He looked reluctant, but relinquished anyway.
“Fine. You take her then. I don’t care,” he spat, storming past you and knocking into your shoulder as he went. You genuinely couldn’t tell whether it was deliberate or an accident. You didn’t pay much mind, taking a moment to curb your frustration at the man before turning your attention back to the girl.
“You coming?” You raised a brow, nodding your head back to the door. Though she shook her head fervently.
“No! We’ve always stayed together, it’s not fair!”
Your eyes widened slightly. Why the hell would she want to stay? The men’s barracks constantly stank of BO and shit. “I mean, you can stay here if you want,” you offered, knowing she would finally take the offer to come with you.
“Wait, really? Thank fuck! That Flagon guy kept saying I had to be with the women but that’s just not how things work with us.”
…Or not.
“Oh fuck I didn’t actually think you would say yes. No, you can’t stay here, and I’m kinda surprised you want to. It stinks to the Walls and back.” You scrunched your nose, glancing at your surroundings. Yep, this was definitely a men’s room. You saw Isabel about to open her mouth again in protest, before Farlan stepped in.
“Ah, sorry. We’ve just, never been separated before. Grouped together for survival down there and it’s gonna take some time for us to adjust,” he explained, scratching the back of his head. Somewhere in your mind, you registered how surprisingly sweet he was. A face you couldn’t say no to. Annoyingly.
You sighed heavily. “Look, if it puts you at ease, you can bunk in my dorm. We’ve had a bed spare for a while since– well, yeah, a while ago. I’ll get Nifa to find you some sheets and I’ll steal some pillows or something.” It was more of a mental checklist than intentionally telling them what you had planned. You trailed off, still thinking about what you had to do to get things ready for them, before your thoughts were interrupted.
“What happened? You said you’ve had a bed spare for a while. What happened?” It was the first time you’d heard him speak after just saying his own name. You raised your eyes to meet Levi’s, your expression falling solemn.
“What always happens. Titans.” You didn’t mean to sound so hollow, but the room fell silent at the mention of what awaited you beyond the Walls. None of them had even seen a titan before. You wished you possessed that same blissful ignorance. Ilse didn’t. “Anyway,” you broke the silence awkwardly, “come on, I’ll show you to your bed. You guys can come too if you want, it might be nice to know how to get to each other easily. Only Flagon seems to be a stickler for rules here. Men are constantly in the women’s barracks, and vice versa.”
You were glad for the short hop to the opposite side of the small square, explaining the different wooden buildings to the three of them. “So, that’s your barracks, that one is laundry, washing up, all that shit, the one opposite is the main mess hall and kitchen, that track leads down to the training grounds which is where you’ll be later today, and thiiiiiiiiis–” you opened the door to the women’s side of the barracks, “–is where you’ll be staying. Quaint, no? Certainly smells better than the men’s.” You glanced at the two behind you. “Uh, no offence or anything.”
“None taken.” Okay that was definitely sarcastic. Even his glare was dripping with sarcasm. Yeah, Levi really needed to lighten up.
Out of courtesy, you knocked on your door before striding in, not actually listening for a response. You were lucky Nanaba wasn’t changing when you invaded her space.
“You know, there’s no real point in knocking if you’re not gonna listen to the response.”
“I didn’t think anyone was in here!”
“Evidently.”
“I’m just showing the new kid to her bunk. Good news! We got a new roomie,” you grinned, though froze upon seeing her disgusted expression. Straightening up, you folded your arms. “Got a problem with that?”
Unfortunately, Nanaba was never one to back down from a fight. Neither were you, which would often lead to some explosive arguments when you butted heads. “Yeah, I do. The fucking criminal? She still stinks like shit.”
Your fury flared, eyes flashing dangerously at her arrogance. “I’d like to see you crawl up from the bowels of hell still smelling like roses,” you spat, gaze narrowing venomously on your roommate, who returned your animosity.
“I’m just saying, if she slits our throats in our sleep I’m going to fucking kill you.”
You barked a sharp laugh of disbelief. “She’s a fucking kid, Nana. You know you don’t have to be a cunt about everything. You can just let things happen without opening your shitty, toxic mouth about it. If you don’t like it, find another dorm.”
“Are you serious right now?”
“Deadly fucking serious. So either get over yourself and stop being such a bitch, or leave. Two choices. Pick one. Because she’s staying.” You all but snarled. You’d never pegged Nanaba as being such an arrogant bitch about things like this. She’d always been pretty chilled out, so you had no idea where this was coming from. Before she could answer though, Isabel piped up from the bed, a little too meekly for your liking.
“It’s okay… I can find somewhere else. I don’t have to–”
“The hell you will. You’re staying.” Your tone held no room for argument. “Nanaba,” you prompted sharply. The woman strode up to you, her face inches from yours, scrutinising. Holding firm, you resisted the urge to push her back.
“This won’t bring her back, you know.”
You stopped dead, and the concept of breathing became merely that. A concept.
“The fuck are you talking about…?” It was a stupid question. You already knew what she was talking about. Though there was no sympathy in her eyes. Only burning savagery.
“I get you wanting the empty space filled, but this won’t bring her back. Stop dragging us into your guilt fuelled–”
She didn’t finish. You didn’t let her finish. Before she could blink you shoved her against the wall, your arm against her throat. Not cutting off her airway, but enough for her to realise you could if you wanted to.
“Finish that sentence. I fucking dare you.” You’d didn’t usually let your anger get the better of you, nor that guilt she was talking about. Besides, she was still alive. Her body was never found. You were just waiting for the day she came home.
“It’s been three years. She’s dead. Move. On.”
You pulled off her with a sharp shove into her throat, levelling her with a piercing glare. “You don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Come on. I know everyone else is oblivious but I can see right through you. Y–”
“Nanaba, I'll give you thirty seconds to leave before I kick the ever-loving shit out of you.”
She looked a little taken aback. You didn’t give out empty threats like that. Not ones you could easily achieve, and if two seconds ago was anything to judge you by, you saw her come to her own conclusion. “Fine. But if we all end up dead, know it will be your fault,” she hissed, her lip curling in disgust as her eyes slid to the kid next to you.
Some wave of protectiveness hit you, and you stepped in front of her without thinking. Nanaba scoffed, before storming out, Farlan swiftly moving out of her way. Levi stayed put. You almost smiled at that.
The moment she was gone, you relaxed slightly, though your shoulders still tensed. “Sorry. About that. She’s not usually like that but–” you stopped dead as an unfamiliar warmth encased your side, Isabel’s arms wrapping around your middle. Your eyes bulged, not really knowing how to respond.
“Thank you,” she muffled into your arm. Your confusion melted into a warm smile. Who knew criminals could be so endearing?
“Don’t mention it. I should probably leave you to get settled in. I’ll come back for you when Flagon starts training. Should be in, like, an hour or so.” Understanding her cue, Isabel took her arms from you, though her eyes still sparkled with gratitude. You still had one question for her. “Out of curiosity… How old are you?” There was a little trepidation in your tone, almost too scared to ask out of fear of the answer.
“Fourteen!” she answered proudly.
Your heart sank. “Oh my Walls, you really are just a kid… Erwin has so much to answer for,” you muttered, your words clipped. You turned only to be faced by the other two, having almost completely forgotten they were there. As if your display wasn’t embarrassing enough, you forgot the three most dangerous criminals to previously walk the Underground were there to witness it. Fan-fucking-tastic.
“You guys are welcome to stay. Or not. Honestly do what you want. Personally speaking, I couldn’t give less of a shit.”
Drink. You needed a drink. Tea, coffee, vodka, anything. Not many taverns would be open this time of day, and you didn’t have permission to leave the premises today either, but that hadn’t really stopped you before. You strode back out into the fresh air, which helped somewhat, and made a beeline for the mess hall. Your hands almost shook as you slipped through the back door and into the kitchen, not really wanting to talk to anyone. There weren’t many in the hall, but you still didn’t want to risk it.
You searched the cupboards first, for any sign of alcohol, as doubtful as that was. Predictably, your search came up short. As did your search for coffee. Fucking Hange. Tea it was. And in hindsight, it was probably the healthier option. Though the lid of the tin was dusty with disuse, and you didn’t doubt the inside was exactly the same. Nobody drank tea here. Not even you. Only when you were truly desperate.
Like now.
With trembling fingers, you lit the stove, filled the pot, and waited. Though with the growing silence, you started to feel uneasy. The back of your head started to itch, and you inched towards the knife block. Fuck, was Nanaba right? Were they seriously here to pick you all off one by one? An uncanny rage fuelled your bones. If you were going to be taken down here, you weren’t going down without a fight. Your fingers curled around the hilt of a kitchen knife.
“Pretty sure you don’t need–”
Startled, you whirled, the blade flying from your hand. Truthfully, you didn’t want to throw it so soon, not without seeing who it was. But you hadn’t expected anyone to speak up. The room was silent after the sharp twang of the metal embedding into the wood, inches from the thug’s face.
“–knives to make tea,” he finished, silver eyes gliding to the still quivering blade, a brow quirked with intrigue. “Good throw.”
“What the fuck is your problem?” You accused, placing the second knife in your hand back into the block and crossing back over to your boiling pot.
“You… throw a knife at me, and ask what my problem is?” Levi drawled, folding his arms and leaning against the door frame. His eyes flickered to your shaking hands, chalking it down to adrenaline.
“Not many people take kindly to being sneaked up on like that, just to let you know,” you bit back, mind still reeling from this shitshow of a day. Pressing your palm to your forehead, you tried to calm the headache you could already feel pounding against your skull, hoping the tea might help with the ailment. “I’m making tea, if you want any.” You offered, still trying to recover from your close murder charge.
“You change your tune quickly.”
You sighed, exhausted. “Look, it’s been a hell of a day. Do you want some stupid tea or not?” Dealing with some tiny guy’s attitude was not how you wanted the rest of your afternoon to go, honestly. And you were already getting really sick of his blank stares.
“Sure.”
“Oh, don’t sound too grateful, will you?”
At the expense of that knife possibly finding its way into your back, you turned back to the counter, now retrieving two mugs from the cupboard. You saw one of the strainers missing from the open drawer, and chalked that down to Captain Erwin. Though you hadn’t seen him, you thought you could detect the slightest warmth to the cast iron pot. He must have brewed himself one beforehand. Wait, was he the one to finish off the coffee?
Bastard.
The kettle started to whistle, announcing with great flamboyance that its job was done. Using the stained cloth from the hook next to the stove, you poured the steaming water into one of the mugs, before dipping the strainer of leaves in. You almost turned round and threw the pot at Levi’s head when you heard him scoff in disgust.
“What?” You asked, too irritated to turn and look at him.
“How is everything up here just as filthy as it is down there? Would have thought you’d keep your standards higher.”
“Don’t like it? Get your own shit then.” Why, today of all days, was this fucking asshole testing you? If he didn’t stop soon, you might genuinely have to answer to the court after killing him.
“You’re making it wrong as well.”
The slam of the pot on the counter shattered the peace of the kitchen, your glare akin to the knife you hurled at the door earlier. Though he seemed completely unbothered by your fury. He was the second person you’d met who didn’t shit themselves when you looked at them like this. The first person being Nanaba.
You watched him shrug, before sauntering up next to you, taking the strainer from your hands and dumping the contents into the bin, before pouring the brew away.
“What the fuck? That was m–”
“Sit.”
You scoffed in disbelief. “Excuse me? You just got here and are already barking out orders. I’m a higher rank than you, you can’t just–”
Oh shit. Looks like you weren’t the only one with a hair-raising glare. With a furious huff, you shut your mouth. And, to your credit, you did technically sit. But clearly where he didn’t want you too. The countertop seemed as good a place as any, but his own annoyed glare told you otherwise. Guess he just should have been more specific with his instructions
Though your heart was still angry at the events of the day, you felt your face muscles relax as you watched the almost mesmerising process of this man make a cup of tea. He made it with the expertise you would not expect someone like him to have. You almost felt bad for judging him before. Almost.
“There. Now it won’t taste like piss.”
“Lot’s of experience with that kind of thing, have you?” To your unending surprise, he actually smiled. Well, almost. It was a half smirk hidden by a teacup, but there was a smile there! You swore.
Falling into a strangely comfortable silence, you finally let yourself relax, the aromas of the brew sending you into some kind of peaceful trance. Even your shoulders relaxed, which was completely out of character for you. The back of your head touched the wooden cupboards behind you as you let out a breath, feeling a slight tickle on the side of your face.
Hange called it your superpower, to know when someone was looking at you, but you could always feel it, no matter who it was or how far away they were. So you weren’t surprised when you turned your head to see Levi looking at you with a brow raised.
“What?” You asked, a little less unkindly this time.
“Nothing” he responded, turning back to face the other side of the kitchen. You huffed a laugh, returning back to your relaxed position. It was his turn to ask.
“What?” He asked, almost defensively, and your smile broke into a grin.
“Nothing, just… thinking. Guess I can cross ‘have tea with a notorious criminal’ off my bucket list.”
There was a silence, and you worried briefly if you’d offended him in some way, until you heard a huff of laughter mirror your own.
“Guess you can.” He didn’t turn to look at you this time, but he didn’t need to for you to know he was as relaxed as you were. Weird. “Thank you.”
Well… that caught you off guard. You sat up, crossing your legs on the counter. “What for?”
“Helping Izzy. Defending her. Your roommate’s an asshole.”
You sighed, resting your elbows on your knees. “She’s not so bad when you get to know her, she’s just protective and can lash out when shit like that happens.” You couldn’t help but feel slightly bad for treating her the way you did when you could have just had a conversation with her about it instead.
“Still. Thanks.”
A smile pulled at the corners of your lips, and you let it unfurl. “Don’t mention it. You two aren’t so different.”
Oh he turned to look at you then, eyes narrowing in offence. “The fuck is that supposed to mean?”
You smiled once again, blossoming into a teasing grin. “You both seem like assholes, but not so bad when you get to know you.”
Levi clicked his tongue in what you assumed was irritation. A better reaction than you were hoping for. “You don’t know me.”
Hopping down from the counter, you drained the last remnants of your drink, now in much better spirits than you were before this conversation. “Not yet I don’t, but I will. Your tea tastes like shit by the way. See you at training!” You waved him goodbye before he could respond, though you didn’t miss his mutter of “fucking brat” as you left the kitchen, almost skipping down to the training ground.
Maybe these three won’t be such a nuisance afterall. And maybe he won’t be as bad as you thought he would be.
“So, then what happened?” Hange was way, way too excited about this fight between you and Nanaba.
You’d only really seen them get this hyper when the conversation turned towards titan anatomy, so this was a little foreign to you. They also seemed to be strangely interested in your shared tea with the raven headed one, though their cause of interest escaped you.
“Well, then she just kind of left, and I apologised to those three on her behalf. Was she out of order? Or did I just majorly overreact?” You asked with no small degree of insecurity. Though you were known for your silent anger, you were also known for occasionally lashing out when stressed. And fuck were you stressed during that exchange.
“I’ve never really known Nanaba to act out like that. It’s quite strange for her, she doesn't seem the type to lash out on a whim,” Nifa thought aloud, her eyes fixed somewhere beyond the ground.
You’d found your way down to the training ground after sharing impromptu tea with Levi, being there almost as early as Hange before other squads started to trickle in. You’d instantly spotted Nanaba whispering to Miche, you assumed about the situation. That was fine, they could whisper all they want. You were content knowing you were in the right about this. Right?
An ear piercing screech of your name had your head whipping round, wondering who the fuck could be that excited to see you, other than Hange who was standing right there. The voice wasn’t familiar, not that you remembered anyway, and it only made sense when your eyes focussed on the young girl who’d hugged you earlier.
Isabel.
“Oh hey, you, how’re you–” Your eyes widened in horror as you realised she wasn’t going to stop barrelling towards you, and had full intention of crashing straight into you. “Oh no wait waitwaitwaitWAIT I–”
Cut off by the surprising impact, you felt the full weight – which was admittedly not much – of this fourteen year old girl colliding into you, throwing you backwards into the dirt in possibly the tightest hug you’d ever experienced in your life. With little grass to cushion your fall, your spine sang in distress, vibrations rattling up and down your vertebrae. Though, despite the pain, you managed to huff out a wheezed laugh. “Hey, Izzy.”
You could barely hear her response over Hange’s howl of laughter, and Nifa’s delicate giggles. “I was hoping you would be here.”
Your heart clenched, having not expected her to latch onto you quite so quickly. Not that you minded, in a strange way. It was extremely endearing how, for a criminal of The Underground, she was so trusting.
“‘Think I’d miss your big debut? I wanna see what you’re capable of, kid,” you grinned as she clambered to her feet, taking Nifa’s hand to help yourself up. Hange had barely managed to stop howling like a jackal before the blond came running up, spewing more apologies than you could count.
“I am so sorry about her, she doesn’t know her own strength. We didn’t think she could knock somebody like you over. Fuck sake’s, Isabel, can’t you just behave like an adult for once in your fucking life? All you needed to do was–”
You couldn’t help but feel like Farlan was being a little harsh with her, especially when her face morphed into a petulant pout. She reminded you of yourself at that age. Headstrong, brash, explosive. You never quite had her over-trusting nature nor her excitement, but the similarities were there nonetheless.
“It’s fine,” you butted in, interrupting him. “Seriously, I’ve received worse injuries than a kid knocking me over, I can promise you that.” That same familiar tickle made itself known on the side of your head, and you glanced to see Nanaba staring with nothing but searing hatred. Fucking Walls, you were starting to think this problem ran deeper than just a criminal moving into your dorm. Though… when you put it like that…
“Calm down, both of you. Behaving like children.”
It was strange, you thought, that for someone who talked so little, his voice was incredibly distinctive. You noted Levi already had his gear strapped to his hips, only now realising Farlan had done the same. Assuming Isabel had simply run straight down here, you quirked your head to the side.
“You're not joining them in the air, Izzy?”
“Don’t call her that.”
You blinked, surprised at the venom in Levi’s tone. Just as you thought you could have been friends with the man, he goes and pulls stunts like this. Fucking freak. Hange sucked in a breath behind you, clearly wondering whether you were about to go ape shit at him. But you’d had enough of that today, and you weren’t going to let this taint the tea from earlier.
“Okay. You’re not joining them in the air, Isabel?” You rephrased. Might as well respect the man’s wishes. They were family, they said so themselves.
More or less.
“I think Flagon wanted me to start off with the horses, since I’m already good with animals.”
You paused for a moment, wondering just how many animals found their way down into The Underground, until you considered rats and mice. And as sweet as it was that she could defend the rodents, horses were a completely different ballgame. Though you didn’t want to crush that starry-eyed look.
“You’re gonna nail it. Good luck!” You offered her two thumbs up, hoping she would take the cue and end the conversation.
She didn’t.
“Luck? I don’t need luck. None of us have ever needed luck. Ever. We make our fortune–”
“Izzy…” Farlan warned, placing a hand on her arm.
Your gaze oscillated between them, wondering how to exit this conversation without seeming rude. Your hopes lay with Hange and Nifa, who had taken several steps back to watch the exchange, muting and chuckling between themselves. Clearly they were going to be no help at all.
“–and you haven’t even seen what bro can do with ODM gear. He’s like a bird! Constantly swooping and soaring faster than any of us can, that’s for sure. And faster than any of you can! Just you wait, you’ll s–”
“We’re done here.”
How did Farlan have no luck getting through to the kid, when Levi could stop her in her tracks in a heartbeat? It was baffling to witness, and you almost pitied the blond, if you were being honest. Although… Was that…?
Definitely. That was definitely the slightest quirk of amusement on Levi’s face. Or was it fondness? You honestly couldn’t tell the difference. You doubted anybody could, not even these two.
“Well, that was certainly something! At least you know the girl likes you, and maybe the blond too, that’s three outta three!” Hange beamed excitedly, hooking an awkward arm around your shoulders as you both watched the three walk away, Isabel still gesturing wildly as she spoke. Sweet kid.
“I haven’t really spoken to Farlan much, and I don’t know if you just heard what happened, but Levi literally told me to not call Isabel by a nickname… so I have at least one out of three, maybe,” you sighed, folding your arms. You were no stranger to people blowing hot and cold, it was borderline required in the Scouts. But he’d been here for less than a full day, and he was already giving you incredibly mixed signals?
Ridiculous human being.
“Hey.”
Your heart froze the second you heard her dulcet tone and irritated cadence. Hange looked between you and the woman behind you, before decisively opting to not be a part of what was obviously going to be a very awkward conversation, and wandering off to find Nifa. Where’d she gone during your chat with the three newcomers?
With a ‘fuck you’ of a huff, you turned to meet Nanaba’s hard stare. Sucking in a breath, you kept your arms folded. If she was going to be defensive, so were you. “Hey.”
“Wanna talk?” She offered stiffly.
“Depends. Are you gonna be a cunt?” You asked, raising a brow as she rolled her eyes. Well, at least she wasn’t going to instantly go for your throat. A bonus.
“You can understand why I was, though, right?”
You let loose the breath you were holding, realising this wasn’t going to be a fight, but rather an actually mature conversation. Holy shit. You never thought it possible. “Obviously. I’m not an idiot, Nana. But seriously? She’s a child. How much murdering do you think she’s actually done? Do you not think maybe the other two might be doing most of the stabbing, and the worst she’s done is maybe steal a man’s coin purse?” You asked, trying in earnest to make her see your point of view. You knew why she blew up like she did. It made sense.
“I know, I know. I just– I'm wary, okay? We’re allowed to be wary around notorious murderers and thieves.” Unable to meet your eyes, Nanaba instead turned to the ground. You knew then she was sorry, for what she said. And you forgave her, of course you did. She was part of your family. They all were. Nana, Nifa, Hange, Miche and Moblit, even Erwin at a push, though he was always busy nowadays.
“Nana… I get it,” I also care too much about you all to let something happen. “And… you were right. This won’t bring her back… I know that…”
She raised her eyes, now finally looking at you. It seemed her message got through your thick skull, too. “But we have a job, just as people, to make newcomers feel comfortable. The reason I told her she could bunk with us was because Flagon was being a fucktard about it. She’s never been away from her own family before.
“Think about it, being down in that shit for fourteen years, bonding with people in her same situation, just as we have, and then suddenly having to be away from them? I just… I wanted her to feel safe.” It was a kindness you were shown back when you were fourteen. When you’d upped and left your grandmother for reasons you don’t fully understand or remember. But you’d been made to feel welcome. To feel safe. It was so foreign you didn’t understand at first, but now, obviously, you do. And you had done so for the last four years.
Nanaba nodded, scratching the base of her neck. She knew. And you knew. You both did. “I hate fighting with you,” she admitted to your slight surprise. It was no secret you and Nana had been close since the day you met the girl, but that also meant that when the two of you fought, it was so much worse.
“Why? Cuz you know I’d kick your ass?” You grinned, shattering the tension between you two. Nanaba scoffed, returning back to her usual, snarky self. A light punch to your arm had her usual demeanour confirmed. It had only been just over an hour, but you didn’t realise how much you’d missed her.
“I beat you once!”
“And you never let me forget it.”
Though the moment was sweet, you both knew it was going to be cut shorter than either of you wanted by the grating howl of Flagon’s voice. With shared huffs of laughter, the two of you wandered over to the forest’s edge to watch the two new Scouts demonstrate what they could do.
Hange already had their hands on their hips, surveying the blond’s skill. Your eyes followed theirs, their head nodding in surprised awe.
“He’s not bad, ya know. Not Miche or yourself, but he could easily fit in with the rest of Erwin’s squad. They were self taught, he said? Incredible…” They mused, mostly to themselves.
It was one of the reasons you loved Hange as much as you did. Half the time, you didn’t even have to engage in conversation with them, you could just listen in and nod where appropriate. Unless they started to get ahead of themselves and you genuinely had to intervene and tell them to go the fuck to bed because it was two in the morning and you had shit to do tomorrow… because that totally never happened.
“I’m actually with you there. Flagon doesn’t deserve these guys, they’re too good for him.”
You snorted, hearing Nanaba talk shit about one of your superiors, and it warmed your heart. She was saying this about the very same criminals she was freaking out about earlier. Looking at her out of the corner of your eye, you saw her smile to you. You nodded in response.
“I could talk to Erwin, see if I could change his mind on where he wanted these three to go. Though he’s never made a shitty decision like this for no reason…” You fell into thought. He’d seen their capabilities when he took them from The Underground. He knew how good they were, so why the hell wouldn’t he want them on his squad? They could be perfect additions. You made up your mind there and then to find him later and have a chat. You still needed to chew his ass out for benching you on that mission anyway.
“If any one of us can, it’s you. He doesn’t listen to Hange.”
“I wonder why…”
“Hey!”
You barked a laugh just as the blond came down from the trees. It looked like he hadn’t even broken a sweat. Something definitely wasn’t right here. Someone with not only skills, but the endurance of a veteran? How could Erwin Smith pass up the opportunity of not wanting them?
Flagon grumbled something along the lines of ‘taking these criminals down a peg or two’ and it brought you more satisfaction than you thought it would. Good, let him see just how good they were. You knew his opinion would never be changed, it just made him being proven wrong even better.
“Reset! Alright, you, get up there,” he ordered gruffly to Levi, who you watched give Flagon just another one of his flat stares. You wondered briefly what he was thinking about when he did that? Was he imagining snapping the man’s neck in his sleep? Or was he not listening at all and thinking about something else completely different? It would forever be a mystery to you. Hange’s overexcitement, however, was anything but a mystery to you.
“I’ve been waiting for this. Ever since hearing what happened on that mission, I’ve wanted to see what he can do… oohoohoohoo! This is going to be good!”
And there was the look you were so afraid of. That terrifying fire in their irises. You knew that was when shit was about to get weird.
And weird did it get.
“You’re not supposed to hold them like that, you’re going to break the blades.” Looking over from where you’d been shitting yourself at Hange’s expression, your head tilted in confusion. To be fair, Flagon had a point. You’d never seen anyone hold ODM gear the way he was; with one of the blades pointing backwards. How the hell did that even work? How was it possible to operate the gear when the switches and triggers were all the wrong way around? You almost stepped in to support your superior, before remembering who he was and why you’d felt such satisfaction earlier.
Fuck Flagon.
Besides, Shortass McGee didn’t take any notice and honestly? You weren’t surprised. If you could barely hold a conversation with him, Flagon didn’t stand a chance.
“Interesting… he uses it backwards. Huh…”
Was Hange taking fucking notes? You wouldn’t be surprised if they told you this was suddenly all for research into some kind of titan/human correlation bullshit. Though that would be a little farfetched, even for them. But you remembered something from earlier just as they said that. Something you thought weird at the time, but didn’t comment on.
“He holds his cups like that too. Sort of, backwards-ish. Like this,” you demonstrated with an imaginary mug, “He held it with sort of a claw thing going on. I didn’t say anything, but thought it was fucking weird.”
Nanaba hummed in thought next to you, though once again glancing at her, you realised she was in no way paying attention to the conversation, and was instead staring, not even subtly, at Miche’s ass as he bent down. Disgusting girl…
With the ODM Gear’s signature hiss of gas, Levi was in the air, and the session had begun. Well, he moved insanely well, how the fuck did he make ODM gear look so effortless? Not even you or Miche could look this graceful. You detected, with no surprise, a kernel of jealousy sprouting within your chest. Fucking bullshit tiny criminal able to just fucking fly like that. What an asshole…
Your jealousy was only nurtured the moment he tore apart the nape of his first practice titan. Even with his grip so fucked up and backwards how was he able to pour so much power into his strikes? The padded target almost exploded in impact, shards of wood scattering to the ground. He sliced through the target? That’s just fucking showing off. How was he so good? It made no goddamn sense. You kind of hated him for it.
“Bro’s always been good with ODM gear,”
You almost shat yourself. When the hell did Isabel creep up next to you? You thought she was training with the horses? But before you could ask her anything, her blond friend joined you.
“Yeah… even before I met him, Levi was a skilled fighter. Picked a fight with some older thug at age… oh, what was it…? Fourteen, I think. The guy was like, in his thirties and Levi almost killed him.”
You had so many questions. “Wait, you all didn’t meet at the same time?” You queried, glancing between Isabel and Farlan. They definitely looked more like siblings than the girl did with Levi. You briefly wondered why she only called Levi ‘brother’.
“Nah, I met Levi first and he joined my gang. Yep, strangely enough I’m actually the leader. Or I was. It’s more of a council now,” he responded to your look of surprise at the mention of him being in charge.
It was strange, Farlan still referring to the three of them as a gang even though they're now in the Scouts. You jokingly hoped they didn’t start taking on jobs on the surface.
“Then they met me, and after recognising my extraordinary talent and skill, instantly invited me to be one of them!” Izzy chimed in with one of the biggest grins you’ve ever seen on a person in your life.
“You begged us to let you join until Levi taught you how to clean,” Farlan clarified bluntly, earning a soft chuckle from you and an irritated scowl from the girl. You could get used to this. You could get used to having these two around, maybe even three if Levi lightened up a bit.
“Was he always so… irritable?” You asked, turning your attention back to where he was ripping apart various targets with viscous precision. You decided there and then you never wanted to find yourself on the wrong side of his blade.
Farlan shrugged, also looking back to his friend. “As long as I’ve known him, yeah. But it’s understandable, considering the shit he’s dealt with.”
You tilted your head in curiosity. “Oh? Like what? He’s a man living in The Underground. Sure it’s not ideal, but at least he didn’t have to– what the fuck is Flagon doing?!” You interrupted yourself, spying the hateful man having now positioned himself next to the titan right in Levi’s path.
There was no point asking, you knew exactly what he was doing. Trying to catch him out. Any jealousy fueled spite you’d previously felt was instantly drained the moment you realised this was going to result in Levi getting hurt.
You went to grab the handles of your own gear, ready to jump into action if need be, or at least try and catch the man before he goes spiralling out of control.
Turns out you didn’t need to. He had the reflexes of a cat.
The second that target flipped up from the ground, he was already dodging, as if he anticipated its arrival. What should have been a nasty collision became a masterclass in manoeuvres, and within moments, it was over, the dummy titan sliced to bits, and Levi back on the ground.
Ho-ly shit.
You all watched in wide-eyed awe, speechless. Isabel and Farlan smiled slyly next to you, smug satisfaction written all over their faces. You couldn’t even be mad. That was one of the greatest displays of ODM skill you’d ever fucking seen, and though you were happy to suffer the consequences of ripping your superior a new asshole for pulling a stunt like that, it seemed you wouldn’t have to.
“Huh… you weren’t kidding,” you managed to state absently, hands falling from your own gear. Even Flagon looked on in amazement.
“Let’s go.” Was all the man said, leading his two friends away from the training ground and back up to the barracks. You huffed a laugh.
Erwin was either an idiot, or a genius. And you’d never considered him to be stupid.
“Hange, Hange, no, don’t! Hange, leave him alone! HANGE, STOP, LEAVE HIM!”
Well, can’t say you didn’t try. The moment you’d all eaten in the mess hall, Hange had made it their mission to find and interrogate the three new recruits, despite your best efforts to try and talk them out of it. Even Moblit, ever supportive yet slightly apprehensive Moblit, tried talking them out of this one. But it seemed nothing, nothing was going to stop them. Especially when they saw the three of them in the courtyard. Taking off at an immediate sprint, you struggled to see what they’d spotted through all the fucking dust they’d kicked up. But the moment you realised, you were hot on their heels.
“HE’S NOT AN EXPERIMENT, HANGE, LEAVE HIM ALONE!” You shouted behind them, racing to catch up before they got themselves beaten to death by a 3ft imp of a man. You could hear the footsteps of your friends behind you, they, too, now racing across the courtyard to stop the scientist in their excited frenzy.
You wished you could have run faster, engaged some kind of speed boost that Hange was able to do when fueled by the prospect of a new discovery, but alas it was too late by the time you joined the four of them. “Since fucking when could you run that fast?” You grumbled to yourself, before turning to the other three and surveying a smorgasbord of emotions.
Farlan looked apprehensive, almost worried for Hange rather than himself. Isabel looked almost protective, like she was ready to jump to his defence at a moment's notice. Sweet. And Levi looked as if Hange had just claimed to be the King. It was a nice change to see another emotion on his face other than passive malcontent, even if this was pure and utter shock.
“What the fuck did you say to him?” You hissed, elbowing Hange in the ribs to finally get their attention just as Nifa and Moblit finally joined you. “Did you kill his fucking dog or something?”
“What? No! I just said that what he did was incredible and that I boiled over with excitement!”
You stared at them. Blankly. In stupor. How… how could they possibly think that was an okay thing to say? In your bafflement, you almost didn’t hear Levi’s surprising gratitude.
“...Thanks.”
You looked between them, almost pitying the man for engaging with them when they’re excited. It was hilarious to watch, but significantly less hilarious to be a part of. And you were absolutely not about to get involved.
“I need a fucking drink.”
Turning away from the conversation, you left them to it. And though you felt that familiar tickle at the back of your head, you didn’t turn back. Besides, everyone would likely be turning in soon. Early evening was the favoured time of day for the Scouts. No training, no responsibilities, you could just drink and relax as though relaxing was still possible for you all.
“Oh hey, I was talking to Miche and he mentioned heading to Dickie’s tonight, wanna join?”
Though you may have mentioned wanting a drink, the thought of socialising in a tavern drained your soul.
“Actually, nah, thanks, I’m good. You guys go ahead though.” Waving them off, you turned on your heel. It had been… a day, to say the least. And you hadn’t stopped thinking about Ilse since this morning. With a resigned sigh, you acknowledged the extremely likely possibility that this was going to be one of those spiralling nights.
Paying no mind to the concerned looks from your friends, you left them in search of some form of alcohol, before falling into the inevitable.
The sun was kissing the horizon when you finally settled on the rooftop, contraband whiskey in hand, swigging from the tan bottle. It was old now, this specific bottle. And since you’d already given her bed away, you might as well finish off her drink too.
Nanaba was right. Ilse was gone. And nothing was going to bring her back. You’d spent the last three years of your life being dragged down by the weight of her death. Grief your soulmate, bound together in rain. Shackles around your wrists locked by guilt, freedom’s key six feet under.
You’d waited. Oh how you’d waited for her return. Her cocky grin, freckles and mud splatters indistinguishable from each other. Each night spent staring out the window, each day spent training for a recovery mission that was never approved. Money spent on ink, ink spent on letters to Command, tears spent on rejection. You wanted to make it right, so you’d punished yourself for years. Thinking about her was torture, so no second of the day was spent without her on your mind. Your sole motivation was finding her.
You huffed a humourless chuckle, only now realising you’d been crying when a gentle breeze dried salt to your cheeks. You knew it was her. It was always her. Caressing your tears, easing your pain.
But where were you when she needed her tears wiped? Where were you when she needed to be held?
Raising your gaze from the wall you were sitting on. You had a clear view over the wall from up here, watching the sun find solace in its lover’s dusk embrace.
“Meet me under the fig tree when we get back. There’s something I want to tell you.”
Ever the romantic, she was. Ilse was the reason you fell in love with romance literature, because you swore she got half her ideas from those novels. Not that you could blame her. They were pretty good.
“Late night musings?”
You weren’t really shocked he was in the same place at the same time. You’d known the man for a while now, which meant you knew where he went to clear his head.
“Something like that, yeah,” you responded, inspecting how much liquor was left in your bottle as your captain approached. “You?”
“Being in constant meetings makes me long for fresh air.”
You chuckled, sliding your gaze to Erwin now next to you. It was irritating how tall he was. Even sitting on a wall, he still towered over you. Ridiculous.
You fell into a tangible silence, thoughts of Ilse fading ever so slightly as you thought of all the questions you had for him about today. About the newcomers. You were glad he could read you well enough.
“Ask.”
“They’re talented. Incredibly so, especially Levi,” you paused, searching for some kind of explanation of his face. But, as per usual, he offered nothing.
“Go on…”
You sighed. “Then why assign them to Flagon of all people? They could have been a huge asset to our squad. Assigning them to Flagon seems like a waste to me.”
Erwin hummed in contemplation, but you knew it was for your own benefit. He had his answer already, he just wanted you to think he was taking your words into consideration. Conversational politics bullshit.
“So observant yet so blind. Forcing them to join was a risk in and of itself. Shadis is losing his touch–”
“We’ve known that for a while,”
“And who will be made Commander after him?”
You rolled your eyes. Everyone and their dog knew Erwin was going to be the next Commander. All you had to do was wait for Shadis to either die or realise he wasn’t special and retire. But you nodded in understanding. Now it made sense.
“You really think they’d make a move on you for being next in line for Command? I don’t think they care that much.”
“Being Commander isn’t just about leading the Scouts. It’s politics. It’s having leverage in the right places. It’s weeding out corruption and inspiring hope.”
You set the bottle down next to you before throwing up your hands in frustration. “You know I hate it when you talk in riddles.”
He huffed a bassy laugh, clearly finding amusement in your confusion. You weren’t ever cut out for politics. Strategy, you could do. Killing Titans, you could do. But politics? Oh no, you weren’t brave enough for politics.
“You’ll realise soon enough.” he mused, before eyeing the half empty bottle next to you. “Commemorating?”
You scoffed. “Hardly. Just… thinking.”
“Don’t ‘think’ too hard then. I’ll need you tomorrow. We’re going over plans for the up and coming expedition and I want you to be there.”
You blinked at him, raising a suspicious brow. “Me? Why…?”
Erwin sighed, turning to face the scenery rather than you. A pit of dread opened in your gut as you realised what he was about to tell you. And you already had your answer.
“When I’m–”
“No.” You responded instantly, your jaw tensing. You knew he knew. You knew he knew why, though you found yourself unsurprised that he was still asking.
He tried to reason, barely able to say your name before you interrupted him again.
“I can’t. You know I can’t. Make Hange a Captain. Make Moblit a Captain. Fuck, make Nifa a Captain. I can barely be a Second, let alone take on that kind of responsibility. Anyone else. Give it to literally anyone else. Just… don’t give it to me.” you sounded weaker than you meant to, weaker than you wanted to. Almost pleading with him. You’d known Erwin for years now. He was only two years ahead of you in the Cadets. But knowing him also meant knowing that, if he thought you were good enough, it didn’t matter how much you didn’t want it.
It didn’t matter what you wanted full stop.
“You’re the best candidate to fill the shoes of Captain of this squad.”
“You don’t know that.”
Erwin rested a hand on your shoulder, squeezing slightly in what you knew he thought was comfort. But in reality, it only served to make you feel worse. You were disappointing him, you knew that. But you couldn’t. “What happened three years ago wasn’t your fault.”
You grit your teeth, bringing your knees up to your chest whilst fighting back that tidal wave of grief with sheer willpower. “You don’t know that, either.”
With a heavy sigh, his hand left your shoulder. “You need to let go of that guilt. If we let it consume us, we’ll never take the next step in this fight. Think it over.”
You knew. You knew that. You knew you needed to let her go. Because holding on was killing you. But you said nothing as his footsteps became nothing but an echo down stone steps.
Once again a gentle breeze enveloped you, ruffling loose strands of your hair, pushing them from your face as you picked up the bottle again.
“He wants me to be a Captain, Ils. I… I don’t think I can do that. I got you killed. I– that was a choice I made. To leave you behind. We could have been all poetic and shit and died together, side by side. Fighting to the end.
“And I took that from us. I took that from you,” you let your tears flow freely, no breeze strong enough to dry them this time. “I’m so fucking sorry. I’m so, so sorry.”
Wrapping your arms around your legs, you cradled yourself on the rooftop, rhythmic gusts keeping you company in the otherwise clear night.
“I need you to help me move on. I… I tried today, I really did. Giving that kid your bed… But Nanaba called me out on what it really was. I don’t know how I’m supposed to forget you and carry your legacy at the same time. It fucking hurts,” you sobbed, clutching at your chest. Grief wracked your ribs until your throat was sore and your head was pounding and you could cry no more. Only micromovements in your shoulders gave away empty sobs.
“You were my purpose…” you whispered to the wind, once again raising your head to the horizon. “What do I do now..?”
You went to take another swig of your bottle, but stopped as the wind changed. It was no longer blowing toward you, but rather toward the landscape and beyond. Taking a moment to look, really look at the moonlit washed fields and hills beyond, and even further to your future, you smiled slightly.
It was always her. And will always be her.
With a lighter heart and a clearer mind, you took the bottle and tipped the contents into the wind.
“One last drink. For old times sake.”
#levi ackerman x reader#levi ackerman x you#levi ackerman#captain levi#levi aot#levi attack on titan#levi#levi x reader#levi x you#snk levi#aot x reader#snk x reader#aot levi#shingeki no kyoujin levi#snk fanfiction#levi ackerman fanfiction
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sun to me, part 3
but she was layin' there across me
series masterlist
I hated syllabus week. Don't get me wrong, the lake of homework was great, but sitting there and listening to professors go through the syllabus page by page when I could just go through it on my own and not have to come to class, was torture. Literal torture. I sit there pretending I'm looking at the syllabus when I'm really doing anything else on my laptop that's open in front of me.
By the time I get through my second and last class of the day, I'm heading to my car as fast as humanly possible. I felt like my brain was mush, not because we did anything remotely close to learning, but because if I had to hear the words deadlines, and final papers, one more time, I was going to lose my shit. It was the first day of the semester, and I didn't want to be thinking about the giant ass papers I'd have to write come the end of November.
I get home as I get a text from Luke telling me he'd be there in ten minutes. I dump my backpack in my room and toss my car keys onto my desk before going back downstairs. The only one of my roommates that's here is Lindsey. Ava and Josie both have class until later on Tuesdays and Thursdays.
"Ready for your date?" Lindsey teases as I slide my Birkenstocks back onto my feet.
"Not a date," I point a finger at her.
"Right," she nods. "Does your brother know you're spending the afternoon with his friend and former teammate?"
"Also no, he doesn't need to know what I'm doing," I say. My phone buzzes with a text from Luke saying he's here. "I gotta go," I look back up to Lindsey.
"Have fun on your date," She calls as I walk out the front door.
"Not a date!" I yell as the door closes behind me.
Luke is looking at his phone when I pull open the passenger door of his car and climb inside.
"Hey," I smile at him as I pull the buckle across me. He smiles back at me. "Are you going to tell me what we're doing yet?" I ask him as he backs out of my driveway.
"That would ruin the surprise."
"What if I hate surprises?" I ask.
"Do you?"
"Not the good kind." He just shakes his head at me.
"How's your brother?" He glances over at me.
"Ew, you want to talk about Ethan?" there's a hint of amusement in my voice. I don't give him a chance to respond, instead answering his question. "He's fine," I shrug. "We don't really talk about anything important ever," I explain. It's not that I don't like talking to my brother, I do, it's just that we really don't talk that often when we're at school. We're both super busy and staying in touch just doesn't become a priority, which is unfortunate because as much as I love to hate on Ethan, he's my best friend.
"Why didn't you go to U Mich?" He asks me. Everyone's favorite question to ask me. Especially people who knew Ethan, he'd tell them that U Mich was my original plan and that I ditched him for the East Coast.
"I was going to," I start. "It was my plan, I liked it, Ethan was there, I could play hockey, but then Garden State offered me a full ride, and they have a better women's hockey program than Michigan, so I decided to come here instead," I give him the quick explanation.
"Are you going to keep playing after college?" He asks.
"I don't know, it wasn't something that I had ever even thought about until last year. It wasn't even an option until last year. Ethan brings it up all the time actually, but I don't know if I want to keep playing after college to be completely honest," It was the first time I had actually said that out loud, and to Luke of all people.
"Then don't, it's your life, you don't have to keep playing hockey just because people think you should. If you have other plans or whatever, then who cares." Me, that's who cares. I feel like I'd be letting people down. I don't say that thought, that conversation is far too heavy for someone I've just become friends with. So I shrug and nod in response. He pulls into a parking lot and I look at the building, raising an eyebrow at him.
"We're mini-golfing?" I ask him.
"Why not," he lifts a shoulder in response.
"This feels awfully date-like," I climb out of the car.
"Nope, you said not a date, this is just me making sure you don't rot away doing homework or freeze at the ice rink," he smiles. I roll my eyes, but can't help the smile that creeps onto my face.
__
After I absolutely demolish Luke in mini-golf, we end up at some little sports bar place to get food.
"You definitely cheated," Luke says for the 100th time since we left mini golfing.
"You are a sore loser," I point my finger at him. "I didn't cheat, I'm just that good. Or maybe you just suck at mini golf."
"Please, I'm so good at mini golfing, that's why I'm saying you cheated."
"If it helps your fragile little male ego, then sure, I cheated." He just shakes his head at that.
By the time Luke pulls back into my driveway, it's dark out, which is when I actually look at the clock and realize that I have been hanging out with him for 7 hours. My roommates were going to have a field day with this.
"Thanks for this," I wave my hand in a vague gesture. "I had a lot of fun," I smile at him.
"Anytime, you're pretty good company Edwards," He grins, calling me by my last name, something most people who knew my brother only called him.
"I'm gonna go before the tirade of roommates come out, but we should do this again sometime," I open the door, ready to call it a night.
"Sure, I'll text you," the smile doesn't leave his face, and he sits in the driveway until I open my front door and step inside.
#umich hockey#luke hughes#luke hughes imagine#luke hughes x reader#luke hughes x y/n#jack hughes#quinn hughes#nhl imagine#ethan edwards
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Would AOT men support Andrew Tate??
I'm bored so why not (unbiased headcannons, feel free to add your opinion)
Levi:
•doesn't even know how to use electronics, in fact he doesn't even know who Andrew Tate is. He overhears everyone talking about him and how outrageous or "masculine" he is. He pictures this huge scary man with millions of scars, Dutch Van Der Linde history and that.
•when he finally hears an explanation from Gabi's phone, he tries to peek over from his wheelchair. Let's just say, he was disappointed. His imagination was crushed at the sight of what seemed like a gay porn actor that talks too much.
Eren:
•At one point in his life, Eren Sasha and Connie cosplayed pitbull at a pitbull convention (cult) , what makes you think he wouldn't use the bald hats again?
•of course he thinks Andrew Tate is a dumb ass but a little bit of trolling never hurt anyone.
•No he doesn't like him but he does quote him ironically
Bertholdt:
•Bertholdt scrolls on tiktok only for gardening and gaming content, and anything that doesn't fit into those genres, he instantly clicks 'not interested', he doesn't even bother listening. At some point the amount of Andrew Tate videos on his fyp began to piss him off so bad he blocked the hashtag, and even that didn't work 💀💀💀
Reiner:
•Reiner throwing on his dad glasses and squinting at he screen, "who's this?"
"Andrew Tate,"
He listens for a few seconds, but the words just aren't wording,"Just block him babe,"
No but seriously he finds the redpill community embarrassing af, especially with the hatred they have for single mothers, since he came from one and his respect for them
Jean:
•Jean would agree with a few points, but will happily take pleasure by trolling his fans with Connie and Sasha
Connie:
•If you ever see Bottom G edits, of random bald men twerking or dancing in an odd manner, labelled "top G spotted at an orgie" that was Connie and Sasha
Armin:
•He’s a literal feminist, with receipts, try him.
Erwin:
•could not give less of a shit, his tiktok is full of those flowery 'goodmorning🌹🌸💐😘’ edits that he downloads and sends to people on WhatsApp
Zeke:
•This is tricky, on one hand he looks like the type of man that redpillers would make an edit of, on the other he looks like he'd bully them
Porco:
•I'm sorry to my Porco stans, as much as I love him he would say "free top G" and no one even knows if he's being serious or not- like if you made fun of him, he’d laugh with you, so maybe not idk
Miche:
•He thinks they're pathetic little boys
Floch:
•Very proud of his mysoginistic beliefs, would defend Andrew to his death , and unlike Porco, very much goes on protests to "free Top G"
#reiner braun#reiner#aot warriors#zeke#levi ackerman#erwin#pieck#aot veterans#reiner x reader#floch#eren#Levi#Bertholdt#porco#armin#Miche#jean kirstein
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devil i know | trevor zegras x reader
suki waterhouse masterlist - luvhughes43 masterlist🌷
note: this is part 2 to nostalgia
summary: trevor finds out yn is engaged, and things escalate
lyrics: "i'm okay with history repeating, tell me i'm the one you can't forget"
"back in hell, at least i'm comfortable. need your body when my fire's cold. hand to heart, i'm gonna stay faithful to the devil i know, the devil i know"
word count: 2.4k
you haven't seen, talked, or checked any of Trevors socials in a while. you moved on. you were engaged to a nice man, and you dutifully accepted his promises of forever.
your fiance wasn’t like Trevor at all. he was home all the time, he didn’t prioritize anything above you, and you knew he wouldn’t just leave you as soon as he got his dream offered to him. but he also wasn’t the good parts of Trevor either. he didn’t try hard to make you laugh, he didn’t shout out his i love yous for all your friends to hear, and worst of all, he didn’t make you feel those butterflies that everyone tells you to watch out for. you knew you were supposed to go for the guy that makes you feel calm, like your fiance. but you'd be lying to yourself if you said you didn’t want those butterflies that only Trevor could make you feel back.
y/nuser posted one month ago !
y/nuser
liked by jackhughes, yourbff, and others
y/nuser 05/04/23 🤍
Trevor wasn’t going to lie, he did keep some tabs on you. although he didn’t follow you on instagram anymore, his friends did and when there was a major life update they’d update him. It all started with them updating him on your wellbeing, knowing that Trevor was upset with how he broke things off.
but you knew better. you shouldn’t have messaged him back, especially with your fiance laying asleep right next to you.
Instagram dms
trevorzegras Hey yn… I know it's been awhile but I just wanted to check up on you
y/nuser why? It's been years…
trevorzegras I've just been thinking a lot about us lately
trevorzegras I’m really sorry about how I handled things. I should've tried harder for us
y/nuser you didn't try at all. you literally broke up with me and kicked me out. we didn't even have a proper talk about it.
trevorzegras I know and that’s all on me. I’m sorry
…
trevorzegras Can I see you?
you shouldn’t have opened the first message, but you definitely shouldn’t have responded. And now here you were, debating on whether or not you should go see Trevor. A man you haven't seen in years… your dms with Trevor still lit up your screen, providing you with the light to see the man sleeping peacefully next to you.
…
y/nuser when would you be able to meet up?
trevorzegras Are you still living in michigan?
y/nuser yes. i live about 40 minutes from the lake house
trevorzegras I can be in mich by the beginning of May
y/nuser I’ll see you then
i'm okay with history repeating, tell me i'm the one you can't forget
“what are we having for dinner?” your fiance asked as he thumped down the staircase. you were fixing your makeup in the living room mirror, getting ready to go meet up with someone you shouldn't.
“i'm going out, remember?” you asked, turning around so you could fully face your fiance.
“uh, right. with the girls?” he questioned.
“yeah. we’re going to go hit the bars so i might be home late. You don't have to wait up,” you turned back to the mirror, capping your tube of lipstick and moving on to scrutinise your hair. Trevor always told you he liked it up, so you grabbed an elastic and tried to figure out a style you could quickly do.
“right. well maybe I'll just order take out or something?” his statement took on a questioning tone and you lightly sighed.
“yeah that sounds like fun. maybe you can finish that show we’re watching, what's it called again?” you said flippantly, hoping to find something that could distract him from asking too many questions. although you knew there was nothing for him to question you about (it wasn’t unusual for you to go out with your friends) it felt different this time knowing who you were going to meet up with.
“The White Lotus?” he supplied, but then quickly added “it’s not the same without you. it’d be traitorous to watch without you”. you cringed at the word traitorous but quickly covered it up as you knew he could see your reflection from the mirror.
“maybe you could start a new show?” you stated in a lighter tone “you can tell me all about it when I get back,” you turned around smiling at your fiance. he smiled back and moved over to the couch to find something on the tv. he seemed pleased for the moment and so you decided to make your escape.
“I’ll see you later,” you waved to him from the front door as you gathered the rest of your belongings needed for the trip.
“no kiss goodbye?” he pouted, causing you to smile.
“goodbye” you teased, dragging the last syllable out for emphasis. “bye!” he shouted as you shut the door behind you.
the drive was short, and soon enough you were standing outside of Trevors rental house, unsure of whether or not you should go through with meeting him. you were convinced earlier that you should, but with the deception of your fiance… you felt guilty for what you were about to do.
Trevor opened the door, giving you no more time to question and let yourself be consumed by the fresh waves of guilt washing over you.
the first thing you noticed when you saw Trevor was his smile. you don’t know what you expected, but he looked the same. he was more grown up of course, but seeing him ignited everything you ever felt for him inside of you. you felt the pain, the heartbreak, and of course the longing and loving that came with being so close to him for so many years.
“do you want to come in?” Trevor asked in a low tone, momentarily startling you. you nodded in response, and he moved aside to let you in. closing the door shut behind you.
you spent most of the time just talking on his couch. you had gotten the tense apology out of the way, and you couldn’t believe how quickly you were forgiving him.
“I just think it’s interesting how now-” Trevor leaned over mid sentence, cutting you off with his lips on your own. you didn't pull back, but you didn’t react either, letting Trevor decide how things would go. he pulled away slightly, a soft apology leaving his lips but you couldn’t hear anything.
lust and longing clouded your vision as you pulled him back to you, arm slung around his shoulders as the other lightly caressed his jaw. as soon as you kissed him you started remembering just how Trevor felt before, how often you two would be in situations just like this… how much you had missed him when he left.
you woke up in the morning in the airbnb bed.
“good morning” Trevor said lightly as he brushed one of his hands along your hair that was now out of its updo.
“good morning,” you whispered back as you sat up in bed taking in your surroundings. yours and Trevors clothes were strewn around the room. your body felt on fire once you came to recollect last night's events.
fiance💍🤍: You haven't texted me an update
fiance💍🤍: Are you staying the night with one of the girls?
fiance💍🤍: Message me when you wake up. I love you
you shut your phone back off and groaned.
“Is that your…” Trevor started but trailed off, becoming aware of what you both have just done the night before.
“my fiance? yeah…” the two of you said nothing, looking away from each other and the mess that littered the bedroom floor.
you quickly got up and ready.
“please don’t go,” Trevor pleaded as you stood in the entry with one hand on the doorknob. you quickly dropped your hand.
“i can’t stay Trev i have a fiance at home and-”
“leave him. just stay with me, please” he pleaded, reaching out a hand to grip yours. you didn’t push him away.
there was a brief silence, “tell me i’m the one you can’t forget” you cut through it.
“what?” Trevor asked in shock, glancing up to look at your face.
“tell i’m the one person you can’t forget” you basically pleaded, no sense of pride left in your body.
“i can't forget you yn. i haven’t and i won't” he said, moving to stand less than a foot away from you. he leaned down so his forehead was resting against yours and you both sighed out.
“i’ll see you soon, okay?” you whispered, looking up into his eyes. Trevor nodded slightly, pulling his head away from yours and leaving a small kiss on your forehead. he watched you walk away.
"back in hell, at least i'm comfortable. need your body when my fire's cold”
after the first time, you snuck out to meet Trevor multiple times throughout his stay in michigan. things gt tricky with him leaving the airbnb about a week into your rendezvous and moving into the hughes lake house for the summer, but you made it work.
you felt sick admitting it, but you were comfortable with the routine you and Trevor had created. The guilt from sneaking off into the night soon turned into pleasure, and your love for your fiance turned into something meaningless. the vow you were supposed to take in a few short months meaning absolutely nothing to you.
It was one stupid comment made about dress shopping from one of your friends. your fiance had overheard and agreed. he was actually nervous for you. the fact that you might not have your perfect dress weighed heavily on his mind as he kept pestering you to make various appointments at different bridal shops.
you had tried on about twenty dresses, none of them looking or feeling right. you felt absolutely miserable. the weight of the fabric weighing heavily on your body as the secret you’ve been keeping from you soon-to-be husband weighed on your mind.
“yn come on, this one looks beautiful on you!” your best friend expressed as your entourage soon became tired of waiting and watching you try on different dresses just for you to reject them.
you smiled lightly in the mirror, letting your hands trail down the dresses bodice and onto the skirt. it would have been perfect if this was what you wanted at all.
“why are you marrying him?” Trevor asked one night. you had your head on his shirtless chest, arm wrapped around him in a makeshift hug.
you tensed at his question. you weren’t even sure why you were going to get married. it had seemed like the natural progression in your relationship earlier, but now with Trevor back… you knew it wasn’t right.
“i don't know. I feel like i have to” you admit.
“you shouldn’t feel like you have to get married,” he replied, hand resting against your bare back.
“what other choice do i have?” you replied, sighing as Trevors hand trailed up and down your back softly.
“you have so many options,” he whispered. “you could come back to cali with me or-” you sat up looking down at him. there was a slight blush tinged across his cheeks, and the small smile on his face made you a little nervous.
“Trevor…” you trailed off.
“no, please hear me out. you can move in with me, and we’ll figure it all out” he exclaimed, a slight frown taking over his face at your hesitant reaction.
“i’m comfortable doing this with you,” you gestured between the two of you and the room that you were in, “but leaving… Trevor i don't know how to tell you this but-”
“but what? this isn’t what you want?” he gestured to himself, obviously meaning that you didn't want a relationship with him.
“It's complicated” is all you said, but that wasn’t enough for Trevor.
“this,” he gestured between the two of you and the room just like you had done earlier, “is an affair. yn you’re cheating on your fiance” he stated. “you want to hook up with me? have an affair? fine. i agreed to that. but you can't just say it means nothing to you when you're going so far out of your way to meet up with me. To lie to your fiance that you’re perfectly fine with marrying him despite everything going on with us right now” he said more aggressively as he pushed you aside so he could sit on the edge of the bed, facing away from you.
you stayed silent, taking all of his words in.
“I’m sorry,” you whispered out as Trevor huffed and got dressed. leaving you behind in the hotel as he left.
“hand to heart, i'm gonna stay faithful to the devil i know, the devil i know"
it was your wedding day. you were in the dress you had picked out, you had walked down the aisle with your dad holding onto your arm. your fiance had cried, you could see your friends and family smile as the officiant kept talking about promises and forever.
your vows were over and done with next. You watched in silent horror as your finance professed his love to you in front of everyone you knew. he was holding your hands and you were terrified to break away. scared to continue on with the rest of the ceremony and terrified that you’d have to live the rest of your life out with a man you knew you didn’t love.
“if anyone objects to this marriage, speak now or forever hold your peace,” the officiant continued and you turned, almost comically, to see if there was anyone out there who was going to stop this.
your eyes were big and wide, you were clearly nervous and scared. your hands that were still holding on to your fiances seemed to be slick with sweat. the wedding party looked around a little nervously at your appearance.
“don’t get married,” a man's voice sounded throughout the tense venue and you visibly relaxed as soon as you saw Trevors mop of hair rise from the crowd. “please yn” Trevor pleaded painfully.
you didn’t even look back at the man holding your hands before you dropped them. shocked gasps and chatter sounding throughout the hall as you took off running towards Trevor.
#suki waterhouse fic list#trevor zegras x reader#trevor zegras imagine#trevor zegras blurb#jack hughes x reader#nhl fanfiction#nhl imagine#nhl fic#nhl blurb
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