#Don't mind me I'm just a weirdo
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Time for a lighthearted review!
By now a number of people have heard of ボクの神隠し(boku no kamikakushi), aka “My Spiriting Away” or “My Mysterious Disappearance,” aka the BL manga that Okamoto Nobuhito, voice actor of Bakugou Katsuki, was involved in. It is available to read for free in Japanese here with a total of three chapters. This post contains spoilers for the ending.
Here’s a Q&A peppered with my thoughts on it.
The Premise
Crybaby Uzuki idolizes his childhood friend Haruto who always protected him, but since they started high school, their relationship has soured, leaving Uzuki utterly alone. One day, the pair are kidnapped by a strange man and forced to participate in a mysterious game of life-or-death.
How is Okamoto involved?
Okamoto is credited for the 原案 (gen’an). A corollary industry term in English would be “original idea” or possibly “scenario.” In my experience with comics, this suggests he created the characters and premise, then wrote the concept out and submitted it to a second party to be fleshed out for full production.
The script is credited to Production Beijyu (プロダクションベイジュ), a company who offers a variety of production and promotion services with a focus on editing and proofreading books, magazines, manga, and anime.
The manga—so the artwork and all of its production—is credited to 戸真伊まい, a name I can only guess is read as Tomai Mai, which sure sounds like a pen name and doesn’t appear to be linked to any other published work. This could be for a lot of reasons; the artist might be totally new or they might have worked in other genres and chose a unique pen-name for BL, but the only thing I found attached to this name online was their Twitter account.
How’d it get made, anyway?
As far as I can tell, Okamoto must have personally reached out to Beijyu and applied for their services to help make his idea a real thing. Beijyu gear themselves towards small, independent artists and authors, especially those who haven’t debuted with a magazine or printed publication yet.
For those unaware, manga is a massive industry in Japan, and it can be extremely difficult to get your foot in the door. Many creators talk about having their concepts rejected repeatedly by magazine after magazine, or getting a single one-shot published and then struggling to keep the momentum. There’s a reason all of the huge Shounen Jump creators talk about the intense pressure to keep their work popular and to avoid getting dropped from publication by any means necessary.
Boku no Kamikakushi is available for free and I haven’t heard of any plans for a physical release. To be honest, this suggests to me that Okamoto genuinely wanted to get his story made regardless of profitability—he isn’t just a celebrity attaching his name to a series for attention. There wasn’t some industry demand or opportunity that he took advantage of for professional gain, he must have been the one to initiate this endeavor, and honestly, good for him.
Is it really bkdk?
Nah. I will grant you that the tropes at play certainly reveal Okamoto’s tastes, and we sure could extrapolate about his feelings on bkdk from those tastes. But beyond the similarities in backstory, base themes, and design aesthetic that people have pointed out, the couple have very little in common with bkdk, and in fact, the way they diverge is kind of hilariously shocking??
Okay, fine. What’s their deal, then?
Uzuki is a yandere rich boy who likes to get choked. Haruto is honestly a hapless, horny victim in all this.
What!?
Yeah. The “mastermind” behind the kidnapping is Uzuki himself, who staged the whole thing with his butler. Basically, their high school classmates tease Haruto for being associated with Uzuki, the son of the richest noble in town; Haruto resents it so he distances himself from Uzuki and rejects him. Uzuki ends up lonely with no friends and missing Haruto, so he stages his own kidnapping and puts them both in the “death game” as a way to force Haruto to remember his childhood promise to protect Uzuki as his hero.
That’s insane???
YES. IT IS ABSOLUTELY INSANE.
It’s especially funny because the parameters of the death game don’t technically require them to have sex or get intimate, Uzuki is just a fucking freak and Haruto is confused by his own horniness and goes along with it. The first trial involves a selection of drinks, one of which contains poison, and they have to keep choosing one to drink from until someone dies. Haruto ends up poisoned, and Uzuki uses his prize (“one wish”) as the winner to get the antidote and save him, of course passing it to Haruto via full-on mouth kiss.
Haruto has a gay crisis about it.
The second game: whoever raises the other person’s heart rate to 130 beats per minute first wins, and the person with the elevated heart rate dies. Haruto’s heart rate spikes from aftereffects of the poison, and Uzuki’s solution is… for Haruto to choke him… on the bed they woke up on… so his heart rate increases as well. And then he asks Haruto to kiss him, too, and they just start making out until Uzuki’s heart rate hits 130. Haruto gets upset because he lost his head and ended up dooming Uzuki, but then somehow they arrange for this death to also be nullified, and they end up continuing to play the game for three days.
Three whole days!?!
THREE DAYS! This kid traps Haruto in a dungeon so he can make him participate in weird, sadistic, horny shenanigans for three days!
And then when they finally escape and everything is revealed, Haruto is just blankly confused and has this absent look on his face, repeating that he’ll protect Uzuki. The butler says that Uzuki performed excellent mind control, but then Uzuki imprisons the butler so it can be “just the two of them.”
What the fuck, Okamoto???
Right? And you know what, it isn’t my jam at all, but can we just take a moment to recognize that a professional voice actor who is popular and prominent in the public eye wanted his weird horny BL idea to come to fruition, so he went forth into the world and made it so? And he didn’t even hide behind a pen name or anything, he wants people to associate him with it, he’s promoting it! He loves the hell out of it!
Like, I’m pretty astounded by that, and honestly I respect it. More people should just make things that cater to their own tastes without any self-consciousness about it. Wave your freak flag high, Okamoto.
#boku no kamikakushi#bakuhatsu silly reviews#this is THOROUGHLY unrelated to mha#but I thought it'd be fun so here we are#also there are some typographical choices unique to small press and online comics that I find super interesting#for example how Uzuki uses the pronoun boku EXCLUSIVELY in katakana#while Haruto uses the standard kanji for his pronoun ore#and the characters' names are only in katakana not kanji or hiragana#and you even see little internet slang like ww for laughing#I'm just here dissecting minute choices in how Japanese is written#don't mind me#anyway proud of okamoto for revealing himself to be a total weirdo#just like the rest of us#hope this post was elucidating for everybody lmaooo#now back to your regularly scheduled programming
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it’s funny to me that larries [the ones that seem to care about this, if you don’t this is not for you keep scrolling] keep giving the time of the day to solo harries content creators when they outright want you gone so bad and treat you like the plague and yet content creators out here have to beg you all to give an ounce of support sometimes because you would rather reblog the big blogs content instead <3
#is it some humiliation kink or what?#i know some dont actually realize#but i feel like some are so blatantly obvious#without even checking#dont mind me#i just find infuriating because they act like that#but feed off all of your support on their shit#and pretend they dont see it#while still cursing you off#i'm too petty for this shit#i don't like this type of mistreatment#or mocking#i don't even do the solos dni interact bullshit myself#as long as you don't act like a goddamn weirdo for no reason you're good#i'm sorry i'm in a foul mood im blaming my late ass period#its all coming down to me along with shitty days over and over#so you get me complaining about silly things#[rant over]
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Even though I am a lesbian I do often fantasize about how much better my life would be if I was just a cis straight guy. Genuinely would solve not only my fears about social stigmas but also a lot of medical problems I have. Sometimes I feel like I've been cheated from the good life by a simple coin toss
#jelly.txt#like... it always feels like *i'm* the weirdo bc i don't really like telling ppl i'm a lesbian#just off of that it makes me feel so shameful but even if i just tell ppl 'oh i don't date'#or 'oh i'm not really interested in relationships i don't plan to get married' i get side-eyed#and ppl saying i'll change my mind and i look bad if i say no i won't cause that sounds arrogant#but at the same time it's like being stuck between a rock and a hard place. it's either look like some arrogant youngster#or look like some kind of predator (to some ppl). there's no winning!
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guys you're actually so insane for this
this isn't shit that happens
like, what, i'm legit stunned !
#y'all i can't express how much i'm... i don't know how to word it even#this is just unbelievable#that you guys even care#i mean i WANTED people to care but...#it doesn't feel like... i don't know. it feels unreal that you do.#that you like this stuff my mind produced#that i'm a person that is accepted as “good” in any kind of community#that there's people like-minded that want me around. that enjoy and get thoughts from things that i have made#like !!! that's amazing !#for the longest time i've felt like an outsider#i always wanted to be part of something#but i never really belonged#it's awesome to be accepted#i guess weirdos should go to the places where people are just as insane as them over the things they're weirdos about#ah rambling aside... sorry i'm just emotional from some stuff i just watched#rambling aside. thank you all for the interest !!! it means a lot !#off topic teka talk
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got a “oh so anyone who disagrees with you is an anti?? :/// well i disagree with you and i’m not an anti so :////” and like
disagree on what? what is the discussion and/or argument that we’re disagreeing on? because as far as i can tell there isn’t an actual two-sided discussion here, there’s literally just me thirstposting about mohg and talking about wanting to kiss his cute nose and one or two anons going “how DARE you, a complete stranger, not vehemently hate content that WE say is BAD and not tailor your entire blog and online presence to OUR very specific preferences??? don’t you understand how traumatizing and harmful that is for us??? how DARE you just joke with your followers at us for being creepily obsessed with you and imply that we could just leave if we hate you so much???? you’re a teenager btw so let me tell you my thoughts on incest”
like. what
#fandom discourse cw#i guess#it's like i'm hanging out on my own yard minding my own business and some weirdo is shouting shit at me over the fence#like bro if you don't like my yard you can just. leave#you shouting at me isn't a discussion or a disagreement it's just you being a Fucking Weirdo
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while im (takes a deep breath to hold back my rage) sympathetic to the fans of Those Wizard Books who're taking a death of the author approach so long as they're not supporting the series financially or actively promoting it and are sticking to fan communities, I really, *really* wish people would put away their merch. Because when I see someone in public with merch from it, I always have to wonder if I'm safe around them as a trans person, if my trans friends are safe. And that's a sucky feeling to have, especially when talking to people who otherwise seems perfectly fine and nice!!! A lot of HP fans are just, people!!! Who maybe don't know what the big deal is, or have chosen to deal with the problem by doubling down to spite the author!! But even when I know for a fact they're totally safe or even trans themselves, I don't want to be constantly reminded of the series whose author is an incredibly rich and powerful person whose whole agenda for the past several years has been to push back against the rights of people like me, and who people like my own god damn mother is more willing to listen to about trans people than her own nonbinary child.
I know it's irrational to feel surges of rage at the mere mention of a popular multimedia franchises, but while I know not every trans person is bothered by it, I also know that a lot of trans people and even allies *are* bothered by it. Just... begging for some understanding, and for people to just PLEASE dial back their fandom-ing in public spaces, especially mostly queer spaces. You don't know how much difference it might make in the comfort and feeling of safety for the trans people around you
#maybe this matters less in the US#or like anywhere else in the world#but in the UK............. please holy shit terfs are a bigger force here than anywhere else#PLEASE stop openly showing support for the multimedia franchise that made the one with the most mainstream influence insanely rich#that she still uses to prop up her arguments about trans people#do you know that she's claimed the fact that people still like her wizard books means that shows people support her beliefs?#do you know that she's compared queer people to the villains of her books?#do you know how much she hates us? how much she hates our transfemme sisters especially?#im just a short afab nonbinary weirdo#i'm not seen as a threat by anyone#i can't imagine how trans women must be dealing with this#vent post#technically#ugh#sorry this has been on my mind for a while and i'm in a weird mood rn#don't come at me for this just block me if you're going to be bothered enough by this#because if you do bother me i'll just block you first lmao#edit: not that not being seen as a threat is necessarily a good thing because in the case of us afab enbies we're mostly just dismissed#there's a lot of us but it also feels like we're so invisible outside our own communities#we're just assumed as queer women most of the time especially those of my generation who haven't had any opportunity to medically transitio#except the lucky few who were able to get a diagnosis relatively early in life#or had the money to turn to private healthcare#trans men who don't pass too#moodle rambles
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Not me sitting here shedding actual tears as I write the ending of part 5.
#don't mind me#just a total weirdo#i'm probably hyping it up to much by posting this#why am i like this?
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Finished English Class this semester but am going to read this just because. I’m sorry that the book is tattered. There’s a lot of old, poorly maintained books in my house that only recently got out of boxes and were shelved.
#listen I am not a book nerd or romantic#at least I don’t think so#but sometimes I just intrigue myself so much in some things that I indulge in that spring to mind#I’m not easily understandable and I guess its fine#I used a quote from this book and reading up on the analysis of it I am intrigued and also happy that I used that quote appropriately becaus#in my mind it fits#you just gotta know the context lol#books#literature#wuthering heights#emily bronte#the context of the quote and also why I personally thought it to be appropriately used#In case you haven’t noticed I'm weird. I’m a weirdo. I don't fit in. And I don't want to fit in.#have you ever seen me not let my curiosity get the best of me and suffer the consequences?#did you not see me get obsessive sometimes over shit I love and (rarely I’d like to think) shit I hate?#yeah. that’s weird
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DSD577 Here for whatever.
Gave my account a persona. Not sure why I chose DP. But I feel dead inside at times... so just go with that.
Pokemon, Mario, and Sonic seem to be my prominent topics. But I like lots of franchises.
JSYk I'm bad at keeping conversations due to my introvert nature... or I just don't know what to say. I'm also "oblivious" to trends and fandom hype or slow to warm up to them (I tread the internet at my own pace).
I can be classified as an artist. My art hashtag is #DSD577art if you wanna burn your eyes... Feel free to look around.
My ask guideline
Click here
If my blog is suggested to you then it's an error cause no way is it relevant!
#I like some weird sh!t...#you've been warned#If you don't like what you see feel free to unfollow me! I don't mind we can still talk and stuff#Just respect me and vice versa (I respect you)#true colors show with time!#This weirdo does have standards#DSD577#DSD577art#<- eye Burning#DSD577ask#I'm just making The pounds/HashTags easier for me#they're different when you click on one and when you search it in the blog#or is it just me?
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i got lucky in that my brand of weird is good enough that my coworkers and peers find me, at the very least, entertaining
#nsa messages#although it's an isolating experience realizing that you've spent most of your life being unable to relate to people#I'm not like sad about it#but it also feels funny to see how other people excell at social situations and assimilate better than me#but that's also because the one new hire sam is a dude that everyone seems to be attracted too so they tend to include him#I'm pretty friendly with my coworkers and that's good enough for me tbh I don't want to be very open about my personal life#there are three people who know me the best and thats Roch Demi and Miles#part of this is me just tending to keep to myself and mind my own business#but sometimes i need a designated weirdo to speak to or i will suffer#i've cultivated a personality that just says fully unhinged shit with a deadpann demeanor and people find that funny
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few things that bring me joy like watching HiMERU in the older crazy:b videos and him in the newer ones because somewhere along the line he seemingly got really into dancing and I think that's just wonderful :)
#go enjoy your idol career while you still can honey#good for him good for him#the spps for his Obbligato card and the one for his date scout card are hysterical to me#the discrepancy please#but yes as said let the man enjoy his idol career while he still can#let him enjoy the thrill of performing and the dopamine rush during a concert#let him grow close to his unitmate brethren#let him find a home in his weird little newfound family of weirdos#and then let the Kaname bomb drop :)#I'm just here to be silly don't mind me really#himeru
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So Sherlock x Enola tag is still empty. After two movies. Siiiigh.
#sherlock x enola#but they are so sweet#there is so much natural chemistry#i mean I'm not picky and i will check the platonic tag as well#but people write for that kid she met ok the road#and while the kid is cute I'm not interested in reading about him#i just want sherlock and enola together (whatever that may be) :(#21 fic on ao3 for their tag is so sad#i started watching the second movie and it's as good as the first one#it immediately brought me back to this duo and their interactions <3#natiswatching#where are my local weirdos?#where are you open-minded besties that don't hate fun?#enola holmes 2
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"How can I ask for my internet friends' addresses so I can send them cool mail without looking like a scary internet weirdo" -- me, never even actually sends mail to the people whose addresses I DO know
#that said if we're friends and I don't already know your address I can put you on my christmas card list if you like#in theory I would also send you cards and stickers or whatever but in practice I have never ever actually done that :')#I overthink everything so much forever kfjdghkg I never know what to WRITE or SEND so I just simply don't#christmas cards are nice because I make One and then send it to thirty people and don't have to think about it any more than that#anyway I guess this is me asking dkjhgdk no pressure I swear I'm not a scary weirdo :')#I am a 'has a bunch of wax seals and an idealized version of herself in her mind who makes that everyone's problem' weirdo#about me
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A MILLION THOGUHTS RUNING THROUGH MY HEAD RN !?! sometimes i just think about myself n wonder WHY TF ARE THERE PPL INTIMIDATED BY ME 😭😭
#🌙.rambles#sometimes it's funny esp when online n these ppl are older than me#ffxiv in particular i think i've encountered several ppl that have been intimidated by me ??#but then w others when they talk w me i swear i'm such an airhead#like i came across a weirdo in ffxiv once n i was just like 'huh?'#idk how to explain but several things just easily pass over my head#even when being direct my overthinking mind is probably gna come up w some bs 💀#i feel like rambling rn#i tried some omegleast night bcs an irl decided to as well#just text ofc n i find it funny how i trolled some random strangers w the uhh ffxiv copypasta#& uk 💀#WAH LMFAO that aside tho#(apollo n i got matched together once n the outcome was chaotic .)#UH I MADE A FRIEND THO !! they like pjsekai n like rui n we have similar music taste omg#sobv whenever i meet new ppl i think the perception they have of me is shy/kind or intimidating#i rmber i used to not talk /a lot/ back on twintania ffxiv a year ago but#my friends wld often call me cute :<<#I WANT TO KNOW WHY?? DONT JUST TELL ME THAT N TELL ME Y PLEASE 😭😭#sorry i slept at nearly 6 am i think n woke up at 10 idk n i'm going a bit insane today but i don't feel braindead in a sad way nymore rn#nah tbh i think i'm going a bit insane#gotta get out of the car rn tho so ill stop typing while walking#hmmm do you ever wonder though abt what passing strangers think and remember of you#that's interesting to me wah n i wonder what music they think i'm listening to#but maybe a lot of people don't think of strangers like that ?
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@outofthiisworld asked- (⑅ ‘﹃’ ) = What the character daydreams or thinks about?
headcanons! (accepting)
It's, I don't want to say weird? He kind of ping pongs around the place. Sometimes he daydreams about playing video games or browsing the internet. Sometimes it's thinking or daydreaming about being a different kind of monster and how his life would play out like that.
He often imagines it being somewhat the same. Though he does have an unhealthy amount of thought and time put into dreaming about hunting down people. The thrill of the hunt. The taste of blood and flesh in his mouth. It grosses him out and yet, he keeps coming back to indulge it. But yeah, he also tends to think about being this built up image of a "normal" person in his head. Shopping at the mall, going to school because he never got to go there (or finish going there as he never completed middle school), having tons and tons of friends to hang out with. Stuff like that.
#//yeah so this kind of took a turn at the end#//there's a lot of stuff he does daydream or think about but i'm going for stuff that i tend to have in mind for him#//and maybe something he thinks about a lot that i don't have the chance to delve into here#//because yeah for as much as lambda wants and does normal stuff he's also a complete fucking weirdo!#//and he's not entirely ashamed about it either (even though he does feel lots of shame for that but not the point here!)#//there's a lot of weird thoughts he's got going around his head that he keeps under wraps bc he knows they're not entirely appropriate#//or purely impulsive thoughts that aren't very good but he pushes them down bc they're just that. spur of the moment impulse#//and he doesn't really need to let those loose bc it's a lot of stupid shit! you know?#//and yeah. i could ramble a lot about this in the tags but im going to stop now fhnjdfbhdfnjd#//here's this i guess?#why are you botherin' me? {answered memes}#hidden depths: {info}#outofthiisworld
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