#(but actually it is pretty fun and that's all that's important)
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fratboy!rafe x fem!reader - bunny
TW: smut MDNI, p in v, oral (m recieving), finger(s) in v, alcohol, weed, kinda age gap, non-con (at first!), not proof-read
word count: 1540 words
bro this is long asf sorry and it's actually lowk really filthy .... have fun tho!
pure smut under the cut!
your white flip-flops click!ed against the marble floor as you made your way out of your room and down the stairs to the backyard of your sorority house.
as a freshman at the first party delta eta was hosting for the year, you had been instructed to dress up and look pretty for when the frat boys arrived.
"first impressions are really important," one of the sophomore girls had told you, "you need to look really good so you earn a reputation for being pretty."
you had taken the advice to heart, taking hours to perfect your look. your flawlessly curled hair lay neatly across your shoulders, complete with a little bow clipped onto the side. your pink bikini was one of the most revealing ones you owned, with a top that barely contained your tits. you wore a sheer white skirt over the thong bottom.
just as you made your way through the foyer, the doorbell rang. through the blurry panes of glass on either side of the door, you could see the outlines of a big group of guys standing outside. nervously, you looked around the foyer for someone else to open the door, but the room was empty - all of the girls were outside setting up the backyard. you totter over to the door, taking a deep breath as you swing it open.
at the front of this throng of people stood a tall brunette guy, black polo unbuttoned so the collar hung loosely around his neck. he looked exactly like every frat boy you had ever pictured - hat placed backwards on his head, crooked smirk plastered across his face, and a six-pack of beer dangling from his hands. "hey gorgeous," he said, eyes raking over your figure as he stood in the doorway. "you gonna let us in?"
✮✮✮
the party was at full swing now, and the smell of weed, beer, and cologne filled the air as you stumbled through the backyard. you sat down at one of the tables. as you tried to compose yourself, a guy sat right next to you, hand immediately travelling to your bare thigh. "hey there," said a familiar voice. you looked up at the man and smiled. it was the one from the door, though his shirt was nowhere to be found. a joint swayed between his fingers, clearly the reason why his eyes were low and red. he saw you look down at it and smiled lazily. "want a hit?"
"i'm good," you responded. "thanks though." the guy nodded and brought the joint up to his lips, taking a long inhale and then a long exhale.
"i'm rafe," he said as his fingers began to rub circles on your thigh.
you hummed in response to the motion. "y/n."
"beautiful name. you a junior?" rafe asked, taking another long drag of his joint.
you shook your head slightly. " 'm a freshman."
rafe's eyebrows lifted in surprise and he let out a low whistle. "shittt. you're just a baby, huh?"
"i guess so."
rafe's low eyes bore into you, hand travelling higher and higher up your thigh. "well then y/n, lemme show you how we do things around here," he whispered, hiking your sheer skirt up and slipping his hand up your bikini bottoms. you let out a yelp of surprise and glanced around the yard. no one was really paying attention to the two of you, but that didn't seem to matter to rafe as he eased two fingers into you. you squealed again, hand reaching up to grab rafes wrist. "want me to stop, bunny?" he cooed, fingers beginning to pump in and out of you. you shook your head quickly, eyes closing as pleasure overtook you. rafes expert fingers continued to work inside of you, and you bit back a moan as he hit your sweet spot over and over again. just as you felt as if you were about to release all over his hand, he pulled his fingers out, making you buck your hips and shiver with need.
"rafe," you exhaled. "what the fuck."
"shhh," he said as you looked up at him with desperate eyes. "d'you have a room here?"
you nodded, grabbing his hand and pulling him towards the door. you snaked your way through the people in the yard, guiding him into the foyer and up the stairs. when you finally reached your room, rafe grabbed you by the waist and kissed you hard. "fuck, rafe," you groaned as he planted kisses down your neck, biting and sucking as he got lower. he pushed your against one of the posts on your bed, mouth reaching your breasts. his hands roamed back down to your bottoms and he pulled them off with a crooked finger. you reciprocated the action, unbuckling his shorts and letting them drop to the floor. rafe looked up at you hungrily, lips still roaming over your chest.
"lay down, bunny," he rasped. as you dropped onto the bed, rafe came tumbling down with you, knee pressed in between your thighs. he ripped off your bikini top next, discarding it next to you. he locked his lips onto your nipple, tongue swirling and hand cupping your other breast. you shuddered as you began to get more and more stimulated, and you brought a hand down to your clit to satisfy yourself. "wait," rafe growled, using his free hand to grab your hands and pin them against the bed. he continued to nip and lick at your tits, dick straining against his boxers. finally, he was finished with your chest and he pulled off his boxers with one hand, letting his rock-hard cock spring up and out.
your eyes widened at the sight of it and you locked eyes with rafe's darkened ones, licking your lips. you wriggled out of his grip on your hands and pushed him against the bed. you immediately locked your lips around the head, making rafe grunt in surprise. you bobbed your head on his cock, swirling your tongue around the tip each time you made contact with it. rafe began to groan, panting heavily as you sucked him off sloppily. you looked up at him through your lashes and brought your hands up to grip the base, moving your palm at the same rhythm as your mouth. after a while of this slick movement on his cock, rafe threw his head back with a loud moan. "shit, y/n, 'm gonna cum. holy fucking shit, bunny, keep going," rafe panted, rocking his hips so his dick went farther and farther into your throat. "fuck. fuckkk, y/n." rafe moaned as he released himself into your beautiful mouth. you swallowed hard, taking every bit of his semen down your throat and gasping as you pulled your mouth off of him with a pop!
"bunny," he said, almost incoherently. "hop on top." your eyebrows furrowed as rafe's hands lifted you and sat you on his legs. he used his hand to jerk his now-soft dick a little, watching as it rose back up, all ready to go again. you gazed at him, a little confused, until you realised exactly what he wanted you to do. you spat on his dick, rubbing it all over in preparation for what you were about to do. you hoisted yourself over his cock, sinking onto it with a low moan. it was so big, so big that you didn't think it would go all the way in. you pushed down anyway and watched it disappear into you. you whimpered just from this feeling; how nicely his cock filled you up. rafe felt it too, and he groaned, grinding his hips into you. slowly, you began to lift your body to move on his dick.
up and down, up and down, until it felt so good it was mechanical, until you could barely think - your brain short-circuiting from his size inside you. your breasts bounced as you did, giving rafe a beautiful view. "ohmygod, rafe," you cried out, eyes closed, hands roaming over his abs, searching for a place to grip onto as you practically jumped on his dick.
"that's it, bunny," he husked. "keep on going, c'mon. almost there."
you felt your orgasm begin to unravel, and you announced it, loud. "fuckk rafe, i'm gonna cum! ohmygod," you screamed. it felt as if the earth had stopped spinning when you finally did, and your head exploded into pleasure, your body going limp on rafe's dick. you shuddered as rafe continued pounding into you, hands gripping your thighs to keep the warmth around his cock. finally, he came too, letting his cum erupt inside you (he silently prayed you were on the pill). you were so overwhelmed, so overstimulated, that when rafe pulled out you whimpered loudly, unable to take the fact that you were so empty in comparison to how full you had been minutes ago. rafe pressed a kiss on your hand as he moved you to lay down next to him. his hat still lay backwards on his head, and he adjusted it as he turned to face you. "good job, y/n," he purred, grabbing your face and kissing you. "you did so so good, bunny."
#outer banks smut#outer banks#rafe cameron#rafe cameron smut#rafe cameron x reader#rafe cameron x you#rafe cameron x reader smut#frat!rafe#fratboy!rafe#pure smut#sorority girl#rafe cameron one shot#bruv y am i flopping
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Okay, let me just say this because I don't think some people fully understand just how important this season and these two specific characters, are for some of us.
I think the main reason why this season has had such a huge success is because this one, like Nicola said herself, is for the wallflowers.
This season is for all of us who can see ourselves in either Colin or Pen or both. It's for those of us who spent half our lives feeling invisible, never good enough, or pretty enough or funny or smart enough, just never enough. For those of us, who prefer to lose ourselves in a book because real life and real feelings are just too hard to deal with sometimes. For those of us who convinced ourselves that no one will ever truly see and understand us and love us for who we are, so we obsess over fictional characters and their love stories and just imagine what it would feel like to be loved like that. For those of us, who never know what to say and feel so awkward after taking part in a conversation we didn't have time to prepare for. For those of us who always feel inadequate and uncomfortable in our own skin, who take every compliment as a joke and who constantly wonder at the back of our mind if people are just making fun of us when they're being nice. This season is for those of us who felt we had to hide, repress or destroy any part of us that made us seem weak or weird, just so we could mold ourselves into whatever people needed or wanted us to be. It's for those of us who learnt that you will only be good enough when everyone likes you and have spent our lives trying to make everyone happy, always thinking of how our actions and our words are perceived and worring about making a good impression. This season is for those of us who never quite felt like we really belonged anywhere, so we tried to escape from people and places only to realize that what we were actually trying to escape from all along, was ourselves and what we were feeling.
This season is for the losers, the awkward ones, the invisible ones, the hurt ones who keep a mask on, because no one told them it was okay to take it off. The nerds, the wallflowers, the ousiders. This season is for us. And that's why it's resonating with so many people. Because it means so, so much to see someone like yourself, represented in media; and not only that, but also seeing these chracters grow and step out of their comfort zone, becoming more confident, accepting their own flaws and each other's and falling in love and being loved back; finally being soft and tender and being seen and understood and cared for, after feeling so lost for so long. It means the world.
And all I can say is: I hope we learn to just let ourselves be, someday, just like they did.
#bridgerton#bridgerton season 3#polin#bridgerton s3#colin bridgerton#penelope featherington#nicola coughlan#luke newton
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Aw hell yeah iterator oc drop!!
they don't exactly have a very deep lore so far since they're just a fairly recent character so all you have to know about them is that they are indeed a cunning little shit and loves antagonizing other fellow iterators for the fun of it.
also their design is based off of a bearded vulture! i tried to atleast implement the bearded vulture's color scheme to their design as much as possible
Their local group are all birds of prey inspired iterators! but uh the rest aren't very important unless im bored enough to actually design them
- Nine burning skies or just nicknamed 'Skies' is located at the far up north, between the tall rocky mountains
- their antennae's pretty expressive! they can bend it at will
- skies and their partner owns a pet cyan lizard named shrike (i would draw the guy but i can't draw lizards)
- they LOVE fashion,history,jewelry and golden trinkets and another way for them to preserve the old forgotten memories from the past
- don't separate them from silence. do not separate them.
they have some girlboss,gaslight,gatekeep vibes and honestly??they kinda do LMAO i think they would be leaning more towards gatekeeping
oh and didn't i mention that they are gay and inlove? YES they are gay AND in love!! the iterator shown at the bottom right side is Languid Silence @strandedaylily 's oc hi hello stares at you intensely i love xemm,,
oh also some extra additional art for them! the reason why i made this ref sheet is solely for artfight thanks artfight for making me make ref sheets of my ocs more often
they STARE
#rain world#fishdoesart#rw ocs#rainworld oc#rw iterator oc#rain world original character#rain world oc#rw oc#the birds frfr
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This little NPC is lost. The Narrator [Black] has come to guide her back to where she needs to be.
I imagine Black would be a lot more tolerant toward his NPCs since they're basically just the Dungeons spawns, and by extension, his own creations.
[If you're familiar with manhwas / manhuas that features the dungeon / system genre, you'd be able to understand this AU a lot easier. The majority of my inspiration for worldbuilding came from those specific genres.]
[NOTE: 'Dungeon' is just another term for the Parable. Technically, Black owns a Dungeon and the Parable is just a small part of it. The Dungeon itself is much, much larger.]
For context, the comic below references this post about the Dungeon's children/guard dogs.
[They're more like the immune system since all they do is make sure the (body) is safe.]
[The reason the Narrator [Black] considers them his children is that the Dungeon is feeding off his energy and in turn shares the 'nutrients' to the monsters it produces, which transforms them into an image that resembles his power.]
And the old man below is Joseph!
Joseph is NOT AN NPC! He is a person who exists outside of the Dungeon!
[There are two separate 'worlds' for this AU. Inside the Dungeon (where most of the game-like stuff is happening) and the world outside (pretty much their normal world.)]
[There is a secret third world, and that's our world. Our reality.]
These characters are not actually important or anything, I just made them to make the AU feel more lively. To make a world that exists, you know?
When the Narrator [Black] first established himself in their world, he found a growing problem with homelessness. Not understanding human norms or why this has become a problem in the first place, he offers (tricks) them into working for him as janitors for the Dungeon and they accept for the money.
Most of them left after they got paid, but Joseph was one of the people who stayed. He doesn't have anywhere else to go and has no ambitions in life. He just wishes to live a peaceful life with food and a roof over his head.
Joseph defaults to referring to the Narrator [Black] with feminine terms due to his appearance despite his voice. The Narrator [Black] is not the type to care for such terms anyway so he doesn't care how other people refer to him as long as there's respect.
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This post focuses more on the worldbuilding and background aspects of the AU! There are a lot more in store for the Blank Scripts AU, and I want to explore more on how the characters might interact with their surroundings and how this would work to make a world that makes sense.
It would be so cool if people made self-inserts or OCs for my AU actually. I'd love to see how you guys would work with my stuff. Play around with it like a barbie world for your little barbie dolls. Be canon compliant, be canon divergent, who cares, have fun.
#tsp blank scripts au#I REALLY HOPE I'M MAKING SENSE HERE#this AU is genuinely so big in my head#I barely know how to navigate my way around it to show bits and pieces to my audience little by little so that you get what's up first#before I just dump a truck-full of lore on top of you and expecting you to just understand what the heck I'm on about#because I'm pretty sure if I don't introduce you to the world first you're just not gonna understand what's going on half of the time#let's take it slow okay? sorry if some of these posts come off as boring#I just really love this AU and I'd love to show it to you in a presentable and palatable way so that we can both be on the same level of-#-understanding this AU together#you know what I mean?#and also because I just wanted some background/side characters interactions#tsp au#tsp oc#the stanley parable#the stanley parable ultra deluxe#tsp#tspud#tsp narrator#narrator tsp#my drawing museum
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The guideline to all of the most interesting posts on Doll.
Howdy! I've decided to create this catalogue of Doll's centered content to allow all of the character's fans to reliably find interesting discussions regarding her depth, psychology, role in the story, insights, free time, head canons etc....
As well as various shout-outs to my favourite content creators on this side of the community! (Note for said content creators: if I've inconvenienced you, or made you feel uncomfortable by citing your names on this map, just make me aware in the comments and I won't bother you ever again, as well as erase your names and material from this post)
A quick introduction (skip this part if you are here just for the list)
The reason why I wanted to make this, aside from having a reliable way to look up all of my work, is for the same reason why I started to write articles on Tumblr; you see, I've actually been part of the Murder Drones fandom ever since episode 6 dropped, and Doll quickly rised above the others and became my favourite character of the show.
So naturally, I started to search for some analyses done on my fave, I searched and searched and searched...... and just couldn't find any, aside from one quick @scottmemelordstrashpile (general and usually justified Murder Drones critic, not really focused on a singular aspect of the show) defense comment on a post that God only knows what it was about and where it went.
I kept looking at the specific tag over and over for more than a year, and eventually, I got fed up and wanted to leave the community, especially after reading this YouTube comment:
... Yikes. Luckily for me, I've eventually found out about @melissa-titanium , which finally satisfied my need for someone who shares my passion for the russian worker. She had a pretty good view on her character, which came in handy for me, since, despite me loving Doll intensely, I could never quite put my finger on exactly why and was afraid that it was just her cool presentation and that she was actually a shallow character.
Yet I still wanted more, and asked for more. And then, someone instilled an idea in me: to be the one who provides for more. So, I started planning how I wanted this to go, and came up with a couple of ideas....
Then Episode 7 dropped, and..... yeah. It's definitely the most mind bending episode of Murder Drones to date.
After her death, it felt like Doll really exploded in the tag discourse, not as much as the rest of the episode, but Doll was finally treated as someone (past) important.
At least to me; if I joined the fandom at the height of episode 3, I can only imagine that she was more of the talk of the town than my first impressions were.
But now, with all the useless stuff out of the way, here's what I've managed to gather across my research. Feel free to suggest more interesting things and I'll add them to the list.
All that is mine:
The early days
Asks for Doll's defense
Doll is Wakfu's NOX?!?
Masochism
The fun stuff
Failure girl guide
Nori x Yeva against Uzi x Doll
The Murder Drones RPG
Doll's resurrection: pros and cons
The doorman and the russian
Khan and Doll's scene appreciation
The serious analyses
The russian worker drones tragedy
The show's flaws represented through Doll
Different views on her death
Ship parallels
V and Doll; trauma, mental disorder, and low empathy
My masterpiece
The most important piece of Murder Drones content ever made.
And now, with all of my stuff out of the way, it's time to talk about
The big two.
@melissa-titanium and @dreamii-krybaby are the two biggest blogs to go to if you want interesting takes on Doll and her supporting cast; in particular, Mel and Dreamii are almost singlehandedly responsible for the popularization of the Noll ship and the character of Yeva respectively, as well as partially clearing up some of the misconceptions present in the community regarding certain aspects of the show.
Mel is someone who follows his passions whenever they take him, that currently includes Mob Psycho, Dungeon Menshi, and Dragons if you are interested. He has a very charming writing style and is always happy when people send or tag him into any Doll related post.
Dreamii is someone with a very balanced view of the show and its elements, she is not afraid to criticise the aspects that she likes, and she has a love/hate relationship with Doll, unlike the one that she has with her parents.
Stuff from @melissa-titanium (mainly a N x Doll blog)
Introducing Noll
Happy smile
Insides spilling out
They also have a dedicated Discord server, but I don't think I'm allowed to share the link, so just go to their page and you'll find it there.
Stuff from @dreamii-krybaby (mainly a russian roulette blog)
Family theme
The point of her death
Doll's father
Others
Here, in no specific order, I've put the names of other content creators and some of their work.
Stuff from @rad10active-ketchup (artist with a particular taste for Rebecca)
Too sudden
Stuff from @eveledoze (great artist)
Platonic Doolzi
Stuff from @nyaifyz (they describe themselves better than I ever could)
Doll's pain
Stuff from @yakkuo13 (another artist and Doll fan)
Trying to cope
Stuff from @hjansetv (artist)
Short hair Doll
Stuff from @txttabloid
Uzi's foil
Stuff from @sparklesnake23
A cry in the void
Shout-out to Tirkras, who's not among us anymore :'(
I hope it's just a mistake and they come back.
Look up @scottmemelordstrashpile for various MD related things.
@cmicy has been posting Doll's drawings everyday in anticipation of episode 8.
@biscu1ts made this beautiful gallery .
The @crimson-solver is a new Doll RP blog that answers questions through the russian cannibal's mouth.
@thecoolersolver and her alt @russian-with-a-button is also a big Doll enjoyer, they like to get into arguments with @cyn-bot , a Cyn RP blog. Since I'm talking about them, I might as well credit @lizard12323 , @desgn8n-n , @rebecca-babe , @kittydragondraws , @serial-designation-v , @serial-desigation-vee , @serial-designation-en , @scaredk1tty , @electronix-arts , @blahash , @uzibrainrot and @the-iron-general .
🇬🇧 If you are Italian, check out @zarit-not-here , so that we can start to build our side of the community together.
🇮🇹 Se siete Italiani, cercate per @zarit-not-here , così che possiamo iniziare a costruire il nostro lato della comunità insieme.
@solarspinel has made... This thing which I don't know what to tell you about.
Here's a cool post by @lesslie-sass .
Appreciation (this post was originally made by @zehecatl , but I couldn't find the original so I used the Dreamii reblog, sorry anon).
@md-confessions is a user centric blog where people leave their confessions regarding various aspects of the show.
User @miuleen made this little piece of angst over here, which just so happens to go in conjunction pretty well with this analysis over here by @sisterpaw125 .
@robotthing is a troll.
And finally, last but not least:
A brief moment of appreciation for @dragons-hoard-of-fandoms . They don't create anything really, but their sheer dedication to reblog every single piece of Murder Drones Tumblr everywhere at any given time had to finally be congratulated.
#murder drones doll#uzi doorman#serial designation n#md yeva#md confessions#rebecca from murder drones#md nori#khan murder drones#serial designation v murder drones#russian roulette#murder drones cyn#rp blog#murder drones art#doll fanart#character analysis#essay#md fanart#md fandom#italiano#angst#murder drones spoilers#murder drones episode 7#wakfu nox#theory#mob psycho 100#dungeon meshi#murder drones doll's dad#dragons#appreciation post#murder drones episode 8
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Just talking some Shivadh Romances stuff out to myself, but because I have no inner monologue, I'm actually talking it out to all of you -- aren't you guys lucky :D
I did a bit of cleanup on the Chicken Salad War working document today, and aside from a few iffy points to navigate I think I've got it pretty much laid out. There's 25K words complete, so in theory I'm roughly halfway through the book. It's closer to 1/3 complete in terms of pure timeline, because the book covers from mid-May 2023 through the end of the summer, and at 25K words I haven't quite hit July yet. But much of May and June were groundwork, and the rest is outlined, so I expect July and August to take up slightly less real estate, just more important real estate.
I'm pretty sure it'll come in under 80K, which was the goal. Short and sharp, this one, at least I hope.
The football novel is its own mess, but I'll sort that out later, and then I have a couple of options. There are some time constraints; I need to write the "roman ruin" novel soon, because that has to happen before Gerald finishes collectivizing the estate, and I also need to write Ophelia's Ofelia's (fucking autocorrect) novel soon, since that one is meant to take place during the transition in Galia from monarchy to democracy. So those are, in theory, the next two on the slate.
After that it's the "legalizing davzda" novel, and then from there things are a bit more amorphous, lots of ideas but nothing concretely laid out -- three different historical novels I could work on, or I'm also considering a story about the Duke of Marliave, and one about AI. The AI one was a lot more fun sounding a year or two ago, admittedly. And I'd like to revisit Santa Luna, if for no other reason than it means I get to use the title "The Santa Luna Literary Criticism and Practical Magic Society" referencing Ceece's book club that is also possibly a coven; that could offer an update on Noah too, since by then he'll be at UCSC and sailing to Santa Luna on weekends to hang with the Ramblers.
It's ambitious, and who knows how much will actually get done, but there is a certain level of drive to completing these things because it means all these bits and pieces of stories I've written can be pulled together cohesively. So we will see...
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Part of my confusion about "Rapid Onset Gender Dysphoria" is that it's really just... not a good term? It doesn't really reflect what it's supposed to, which is the idea that some teenagers essentially take on a trans identity as a sort of social role spurred on by friend groups.
I think that this is likely to be actually true in at least some sense, so I was amazed at how unconvincing the Littman paper which coined the term actually is. The parental narratives advanced in that paper are just unbelievable on their face.
Ever since the gay rights movement I've felt that our vocabulary for talking about this stuff is deliberately incredibly stupid, for reasons I haven't quite been able to suss out.
In the gay rights battles, everybody got together and agreed that there were exactly two possibilities:
Gay people are born that way
Gay people made a choice to be gay
I think this is really dumb because those are really obviously not the only two options, and also because there's lots of biological "born this way" things we still treat or try to eliminate, and lots of choices that are still incredibly important to protect.
But also, like, okay, think about sexual fetishes. Say you have a guy with a cheerleader fetish. Cheerleaders are a contingent social phenomenon; no 12th century Breton had a cheerleader fetish. The possibility of such a fetish arose with the invention of the cheerleader.
But it's just as obvious that people do not choose their fetishes the way that they choose, say, a new car. Nobody says, "After listing out the pros and cons, I felt that having a cheerleader fetish was the best choice, because it combines a little bit of exotic spice while still being mainstream enough that it can't be used as blackmail if people find out about it."
No, one day you just realize that you think cheerleaders are really hot.
I do tend to think that gender identity is, for most people, a lot less immediately set in stone than sexual orientation is. My personal impression is that the vast majority of people start to understand very quickly whether they are attracted to men, women, or both, and that they only tell themselves differently because they fear social censure.
I'm not really convinced that the same is true of gender identity; I think that for an extremely large number of people it does function a bit more like a fetish, in that there are people who encounter the idea for the first time, go, "Huh, yeah that's cool or whatever" and after repeated encounters come to think, "Actually I am really into this."
I'm very, very suspicious of the tendency to then assert that this must inherently, then, be a discovery of something that always existed within the person since birth.
There's also the fact that gender roles exist, and people want to be legible to people around them.
For a lot of people, dressing up as a vampire on Halloween is fun, but dressing up as a vampire to go grocery shopping in June would be deeply embarrassing. Because on Halloween all the people around you understand why you're dressed that way and your dress makes you part of a larger social whole; in June you're going against the grain, marking yourself out from the people around you, probably drawing stares and hidden smiles.
Because sex roles in our society are so set in stone, there is a certain extreme dissatisfaction with not following them, even when allowed to do so.
I can wear chokers and frills and pretty hair ribbons if I want, but the women around me can do that anywhere in the country and have people think of it as normal, as obvious, rather than *a statement*.
Rapid Onset Gender Dysphoria, from reading the Littman paper, seems to refer to a parental conviction that their child essentially got the idea to be trans from a peer group who convinced them they were trans despite a lack of gender dysphoria in childhood.
Like I said, the general narrative is really, really hard to believe at face value, for example:
A total of 63.8% of the parents have been called “transphobic” or “bigoted” by their children for one or more reasons, the most common being for: disagreeing with the child about the child’s self-assessment of being transgender (51.2%); recommending that the child take more time to figure out if their feelings of gender dysphoria persist or go away (44.6%); expressing concerns for the child’s future if they take hormones and/or have surgery (40.4%); calling their child by the pronouns they used to use (37.9%); telling the child they thought that hormones or surgery would not help them (37.5%); recommending that their child work on other mental health issues first to determine if they are the cause of the dysphoria (33.3%); calling the child by their birth name (33.3%); or recommending a comprehensive mental health evaluation before starting hormones and/or surgery (20.8%)
So, like, the whole tenor of the paper is that these are basically very liberal parents who are sort of being cut off by their kids for no reason, but like...
This is typical of the general weasel wording used by Littman. Are the third of parents who called their kids by pronouns they used to use going, "She - Oops, he, I'm sorry" one time and getting blasted? Do they claim to be trying but just get it wrong literally every single time? Or do they just flat out refuse to call their child by their preferred pronouns?
When my brother was first entering high school, he joined the Sea Scouts, a division of the Boy Scouts dedicated to learning about sailing. He later entered a maritime college and has had a succession of maritime jobs, which will likely be his career for the rest of his life.
Is that the result of social contagion or was he born that way?
I think the question is obviously both absurd and irrelevant.
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SLAYER
SLAYER IS HERE AND HES AMAZING
a few quick notes:
-c.s>f.s>c.s>f.s is still a thing! the timing feels a bit different from xrd, but its there! no 5K link, though, just use 5H. (EDIT: 5K does link I just suck ass)
-if you can land 6H, you can land P Pile. you can confirm 6H from any hit c.s, air hit 5K, or most of the counter moves such as It's Late, 5H, or Master's Hammer.
-Super Mappa Hunch is a FULL SCREEN WHIFF PUNISH. It is preposterously fast, as well, but you can block it after the super freeze.
-CH Mappa still links into 5K, but ONLY K Mappa. P Mappa gives you nothing on counter hit. CH Mappa > 5K/c.s > 6H > P Pile is quite good, with a lot of corner carry and easy wallstick if you're close enough. use c.s if you're in the corner.
-Pilebunker only wallsticks on normal hit at close range (unless you've done enough damage to the wall, presumably), but counter hit pilebunker will stick from seemingly anywhere so long as your opponent touches the wall (i think? i havent actually tested it but from what i saw doing the arcade mode...)
-Bloodsucking Universe increases the damage Slayer's specials do (for example, Pilebunker goes from 80 to 100 dmg.)
-Slayer gets basically nothing on any Dandy Step followup normal hit without meter, they just result in a soft knockdown so you can reset pressure.
-if you manage to get a Chipp to 100 RISC, while you have 100 meter, and then land a CH Mappa, you can do this combo. It feels weirdly difficult? Last Horizon is not cancelled into here, just linked into, but it feels kinda tight. other than that its very practical, this will be an important bnb.
-He is INSANELY SLOW. His dash is not jump-cancellable and doesnt move him very far, which makes sense given his close range damage.
-Hand Of Doom is pretty whatever, i dont think its invincible the whole way through but i havent really experimented with it much yet.
-Last Horizon hits like 6 times but all of the hits are counted as one, so it scales decently, but be careful using it as it does not break the wall.
all in all hes super super fun and i cant wait to play him against actual people
Edit as I've had some time on Floor 10 with him:
-i don't know if I'm just using it wrong, but Hand of Doom kinda sucks? I think it is invincible but it's quite hard to land (I'm not used to backdashing on wakeup in this game though so it might just take some time to get used to)
-Super Mappa Hunch does NOT suck it's a really good move. Great whiff punish, great fireball punish, though very unsafe on block obviously. It also has a clean hit for some reason? And its, like, slightly longer than round start range? Very strange
-his pressure is pretty similar to Sol's where he just kinda has to fish for counterhits using his normals, and if he uses a special move other than Master's Hammer, you can take your turn back (probably)
-Speaking of Masters Hammer: plus TWENTY FUCKING SIX??? REALLY? I get that it's like 43 frames of startup but Jesus Christ. I'd be fine with it if the hitbox wasn't so obnoxious but it seems to be the size of a small car
-I genuinely cannot understate how horrible his movement is. It is genuinely garbage. Mappa Hunch can help you get in, but JESUS he's slow. He feels kinda like Pot now, actually, given that he has to get in to apply really good pressure
-Bloodsucking Universe is maybe active for a weirdly long time? I've seen the whiff come out and then the grab lands, but that could just be rollback shenanigans
-I miss Crosswise Heel. It was a good answer to jumping over Dandy Step but now you can just jump over Dandy Step. Yes I know it needs weaknesses Slayer is super super powerful but shhhhhhh
#guilty gear#slayer guilty gear#ggst#guilty gear strive#fuck his stage 9 arcade boss battle by the way it was bullshit
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Regarding the sex pet introduction. I remember reading this post from The Lady Of Bloodshed and it was an ask about Feyre standing in the Spring Court VS Night Court. I think it was an old post, please forgive me if I recall it wrong. Please correct me if i got it wrong.
But yes, it also disturb me the fact Rhys introduce her as a whore VS Tamlin introduce her as the "next SC lady". I remember Tamlin set the party and everyone was joyous, respectful to Feyre. Mind you, Tamlin introduce Feyre to his close circle, his childhood friends and we know this friends has influence in SC political structure and dynamic. Tamlin trusted her and I would say he respect her and want the SC to respect her too (Credit to Tamlin from Acotar 1).
But rhys? Suddenly out of nowhere he bring a whore to the Hewn City event/party? No introduction, no proper gathering, no introducing Feyre who is who in HC. Suddenly, Feyre a whore.
If you see this from HC people POV, wont they be disgusted with Rhys and especially Feyre? "The HL kidnapp a Spring Court bride and made her a whore in our court" and of course HC people hated Feyre. Their position os vulnerable because of their HL kidnapped another HL bride. This is emphasize by Cressida when they visit Summer Court.
I get Feyre will be clueless of this but Rhys? It was as if he wanted to isolate Feyre and control Feyre narrative of other. All other court they visited or have history is bad IF rhys think they are bad. Spring Court,? Bad history and suddenly Feyre destroy the court. Summer Court? Rhys somehow dont like them and lie to them and have Feyre stole the book. Autumn? Yeah, they got beef in the HL meeting and Feyre accidentally burn the Lady Autmn hands and then proceed to bully,make fun Lucien and his band.
Urghh I hate the whole thing Rhys introduce him as a sex pet. Feyre was a mortal that got through the trial and can be seen as hero to Prythian but now she is a whore, kidnapped bride from SC and your man dont even do a public marriage with you. It really make me itch thinking Rhys did not do a proper wedding with Feyre. He is a HL, establishing a proper ceremony with his wife is important. It legitimaze Feyre position and guarantee safety of his future heir from being ostracize in the succession line. It would be silly for a 500 years old male not knowing of this.
While all this thing of wedding, confirming Feyre position is not done by Rhys. Tamlin at least acknowledge this thing and were ready to handed it to Feyre.
Yeah yeah, I get Feyre dont want to this docile pretty pretty Wife. But the narrative of her position can be set up and change later after she got married (Though it dont happen because tamlin got paranoid). The least was, she will be wed to Tamlin and recognize as Lady of SC. Any attempt to hurt her is seen as hurting SC overall and challenging Tamlin as HL. Now, Feyre introduce as whore in Night Court. No one would careless if she die why? No paper work, no ceremony,no legitimazation frkm the HL himself.
Thats all, thanks coming to my Ted talk. I shall go lunch and back to Email Factory
Hello Email Factory anon
it's morning for me, I already typed a long reply to this, but Tumblr is fighting me, so I had to get out of bed and fetch my laptop.
(keep in mind i have not read SF and likely never will)
For many fans, Feyre's status of High Lady isn't something they question. Acotar Elon Musk aka Riceball said it is, so it is.
For some antis, they question the validity of it. the argument being: The HL title is not something the current High Lord can pass or share with whoever he chooses, HL is chosen by the land. there is no evidence, lore wise, that supports Riceball being able to make Feyre HL.
my personal theory is that Feyre could actually be HL of ANY or ALL courts due to her having a part of their magic. my evidence being that she was able to bypass the security of that temple in Summer because the magic recognised her as Tarquin. i think Feyre essentially has a skeleton key to every court.
and i think Rice knew that.
i think he recognised not only the threat, but the potential there and not just isolate her, as you pointed out, but fool her too. by having a private ceremony in which he makes her think it was him who granted her the status of HL.
I also think, to varying degrees of intention, he then went on to undermine her authority in each section of his court
The title of Cursebreaker, which should have been the key to his diplomatic strategy in MAF and WAR, was instead replaced
in Velaris:
Feyre could have easily secured lots of love and respect from her actions as the Saviour of the Rainbow. But fast-forward and post war all she has done is a little bit of philanthropy, have sex in the sky, build a 5th house and paint.
Im not sure what she could do for Velaris but what we do get is more about herself and the ic than the people
in Illyria:
Lets start with the fact that because the only Illyrians Feyre knows personally are Rice, Casserole and Adzuki Bean - she should have a more positive or at least optimistic view of Illyrians. but she wastes no time in absorbing and identifying with their racism. and sjm's racist narrative is not going to confront Feyre even when Illyrians only actions on paper are fighting and dying in the war against Hybern.
the books and it's fans will cite the fgm-like cultural practices but not confront that Rice and Co. have done nothing to actually stop or punish it, and admit to needing Illyrian's as fodder - something that is only possible when the society is kept at the brink of anarchy and war, necessitating the continued brutalization of its women and children
Feyre should have gotten the Valkyrie plot. yea, it's a white saviour trope but she is the official ruler of these people so the least she can do is help them, immerse herself in their culture (instead of just wearing their skins willy nilly) and maybe even adopted some kids idk
in the Hewn City:
first we need to set straight that the HC - not Velaris, a secret city - is the offical capital of the Night Court and the seat of it's HL. the people who live in it are the nobility. in a world of eugenics and lesser classes like acotar, this matters
we have already seen that the HL title can skip a royal line and fall to not directly in the line of succession, regardless of gender. (in Summer, the title skipped not just Princess Cresseida but also Prince Varian, to pass to their cousin, Tarquin)
we have also seen that age, even within the direct line of succession, is not a determining factor. (With Tamlin it skipped his older brothers and with Lucien, though we know he is not Beron's son, his older brothers legitimately believed him to be next in line)
given all of this, it is entirely possible that someone from the HC might be next in line. and yet Rice makes no attempt to truly bridge the gap between his Court of Dreams and Court of Nightmares. he introduces the person he knows is his mate to them as a pet.
Again, she's not just a stolen bride of spring but THEE CURSEBREAKER, she could have shown her off like a trophy or a token of his power if he really wanted to tie her power directly to his but no, he introduces her like a thing he owns, a thing that is beneath him.
it doesn't matter that later he says she is HL or that he puts a throne besides his, the narrative is already set: she is what she is, because he said so
a better idea would have been to throw a ball with her as the guest of honour, for her to stop Riceball from tormenting his subjects - would he listen to her? probably not so nvm
in contrast, Tamlin - who given his personality and attitude towards being HL in book1 - might not have wanted a grand ceremony but understood it would be good for his diplomacy and his court
he wanted to publicly marry Feyre - someone who was not his mate - tying them together in front of his court so they could all acknowledge their bond both personally and politically
he wanted her to be recognised and respected as the Lady of Spring even if he didnt think she could be High Lady of Spring
ignoring the similar situations of control and abuse Feyre faces in both - doesn't matter if she decides she likes Rice's, it's still control and abuse
it's kind of undeniable that Rice went about things in a way that is at best stupid and at worst manipulative
sjm tries to walk many lines between politics and love stories but she not every good at either so it just turns into a mess
though i will say: Rice would at least be interesting if he was doing all of this on purpose but so far sjm seems too in love with him to let him be intentionally heinous towards his love interest
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A 3-in-1 set of questions for Don't Look Back if you don't mind?
1) Is Duty Bound the last fic in the series? It's already heaps longer than the previous parts, and I'm wondering if it'll just keep growing and how close we are to the end of the AU story. (I kind of hope it's a while away because I just want to keep getting new chapters ;) )
2) Where about are we right now in the timeline relative to AotC and RotS / how long since the war started? I'm having a hard time keeping a sense of in-fic time.
3) Fun one: What is Shmi dressing like nowadays? I'm pretty sure she's not in her TPM grey dress, but what has she become comfortable wearing? Does she try different hairstyles or stick to her practical braided bun? For that matter, what does Leia wear when(/if) she's not in formal Senator's Assistant garb?
Good questions!
Duty Bound is not the last fic in the series. There is one more story after this with a current working title of We Will Not Wear Chains. I am desperately looking forward to the end of this arc and the start of the next and if I could just get my A plot to stop rewriting itself I might actually be able to get to part 4. Don't worry, there are plenty of chapters of this fic left.
We're close to 2 years since the start of Like Fire, give or take. This means literally nothing in terms of the timeline of the original canon since I've scrapped not only the majority of AotC and RotS plot canon, but also 98% of TCW. Time is an illusion. Mostly the important things to know are Leia showed up just barely older than Padmé and several years older than Anakin and every second she is in this timeline is a second that Sheev is that much closer to death.
Alright, general answer, but I will need to get back to you on this one because @saltkettling is my fashion consultant for all my stories and helps me keep my character's clothes and hair in line and I need to review notes with her one more time to refresh details. Essentially, both Shmi and Leia will have been impacted by Naboo dress standards, Shmi more by middle class ones with a bit of Tatooine flair, and Leia more by Padmé at this point. But Leia also has all of her historical clothing influences in her repertoire, including not only her Alderaanian influences, but also people she was very close to the last few years before her time travel shenanakins. She dresses very differently for anything where she's a representative of Padmé's office than for her personal, practical business.
#Don't Look Back#Leia Skywalker#Shmi Skywalker#writing#I swear I will finish this story one day#canon what canon
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Reblog/comment with your favorite things in South Park *fanon media. Here's some of mine, pairing-related separated since some people don't really care for that, which is totally fine
Craig being partly Peruvian (derived from Pandemic I & II); either not Thomas's or Laura's biological son and half-siblings with Tricia. Also him just being tall asf; I think his dad is supposed to be taller than the average adult male character. Also Craig balding early in adulthood LOL
Plot twist villain Cartman in larger-scale-plot fics
Also, Cartman still earning God's wrath when he really, really deserves it
Kyle being the absolute fussiest little shit you've ever seen, at any age, for good reason usually. This is pretty canon, but still it's important to maintain
I think it's never directly put out there in canon besides Tweek's name being so terrible, but the Tweaks have definitely had Tweek and half the town on meth for years
Tweek being super artsy and those practices helping him relax; visual arts, music, sewing/crotchet, etc.
Clyde Donovan, the most sensitive crybaby football player of All Time
Quarterback Stan, regardless of high school/college/NFL level
It's so sad but longtime-alcoholic-since-10 Stan :( I still love him
Not sure when/where it became popular as it isn't too evident in canon, but the weird Craig and Kenny often being pothead frenemies thing? Idk when or why it started but it's pretty fun
Burnout yet extremely dependable Kenny working a ton in high school and often shooting for custody of his little sister Karen once of legal age. Also him being a scientific/mathematical genius but never applying it to prioritize Karen's comfort and safety instead. Also him being super clean given his family situation
Stan being the 5-in-1 body wash friend and Kyle being a major skin care girlie
When ppl draw them in the show's style and when they make them actually look like they're 9
Adaptation of the wackier canon events into a more realistic context like maintaining Butters's eye injury through other means, Kenny being gone for extended periods of time, Stan secretly taking in animals, still playing superheroes. I recently read an anger management counseling fic where Cartman bit off a guy's finger in an argument which I assumed was a Scott Tenorman Must Die reference
Pairing-related
Tweek being closer to the Tuckers than his own parents; his own house being tidier but the Tuckers' being much more of a home
Craig's been gay since 2007, Season 11 episode 8, "Le Petit Tourette." No straight reason for asking to do "the coolest kid in the world's" laundry. Has a type for twitchy dudes--Thomas from that same episode and then his relationship with Tweek
Cartman's demented-ass crush on Kyle; Kyman shipper or not, that kid's got bigass issues. I do not ship Kyman but Eric's got a fucked up little obsession with Kyle. Bro saved his family from deadly L.A. smug because he couldn't live happily without having Kyle there to constantly argue with
Stan being the one to be super down bad for Kyle yet also be the one with more issues in the relationship. I love Stan but dude has way too much of Randy in him, he's gotta be a pain in the ass
Only Kenny calling Butters "Leo," with most characters not recognizing his actual name being Leopold; being sort of popular as a secretive background relationship and Kenny being very protective
#south park#stan marsh#kyle broflovski#eric cartman#kenny mccormick#craig tucker#tweek tweak#clyde donovan
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So this post is going to be a bit rough and rambly but… I don’t know how we put this genie back in the box.
Do any of you remember when I’d freshly left the abusive relationship I was in and I read VORACIOUSLY, trying to figure out how I’d been taken in by such an awful person? (I vividly remember telling my dad about her saying I’m sure I’m gay because on my previous relationships with men I never thought I was in love, but this was so intense… well. I still wasn’t sure but I wondered if it might be.)
I read stuff like Why Does He Do That? and I Hate You, Don’t Leave Me. I also read things like The Sociopath Next Door and one of Hare’s books on psychopathy. I’m pretty sure my ex just had BPD, and I hasten to say even there that I have known many other people with BPD who I emphatically don’t think would treat me the way she did. I was trying to make sense of her, not trying to condemn anyone with a label I don’t have. (There are prosocial psychopaths, too.)
Mostly I was trying to make sense of her lack of remorse. She presented it as sexy and exciting—oh no, I don’t ever worry about taking kink too far, I don’t care what people think of me, I never give someone who wronged me a second chance.
I now see these as huge red flags and worried about them even then, but I tend to be someone who obsesses over whether I’m giving people a fair shake, so the idea of getting with her sounded like a fun vacation from scrupulosity.
It was actually “surely the leopard won’t eat MY face,” but I didn’t see it then.
Anyway. Around that time I got into a lot of arguments with people here who felt that putting too much stock into those books was inherently ableist.
The things the books said about lack of empathy, about how someone who lacks empathy treats even close loved ones as objects of use and not as full people, resonated with how I’d been treated by someone who professed to care about me. But it ruffled HARD the feathers of people for whom “lacking empathy” just means “beepy boopy, but not uncaring.” I have no solution to this—I think they’re two different phenomena that unfortunately have the same name (on tumblr. Not sure they do offline.)
Any double way. One thing I kept coming across in that research was the specter of the sociopathic leader. A charismatic public figure who charms a whole community or nation, and once they do that, rule with an iron fist.
The appeal was eerily similar to why I’d latched on to such a gross girlfriend. “Don’t you ever just want to go ape shitt,” basically. What if you don’t have to care? What if you get to put yourself, your family, your tribe, America First?
Doesn’t that take a load off your mind?
Those weird leftists who don’t understand God or gender or American exceptionalism… what if you don’t have to understand them anyway?
What if all you have to do is win?
My books said THAT is why we should continue to think of sociopathy as bad and people who have it as predators. Not because human rights stop mattering if someone isn’t neurotypical but because the attitude is infectious.
A person who thinks that way by default, if they’re charismatic (and many are), can EASILY get someone who doesn’t think that way to start wondering why they bother with perspective taking and empathy and remorse anyway.
Dehumanization is a virus, and people like that are carriers. The more power they have in a society, the more virulent the strain.
Do most people eventually snap out of it? I mean I’d better think so, my sister in law is German.
But how long does it take?
That I don’t know. And that’s what makes me think Trump might win.
And why I continue to think fighting ableism is important but ALSO to think acting like empathy is superfluous is playing with fire.
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Tag Game Tuesday Wednesday: 911 Lone Star Fandom Edition
Tagged by @liminalmemories21 and @freneticfloetry thanks, and good timing! You both caught me on my lunch break
When did you first start watching Lone Star? Who or what introduced you to the show?
I can't remember the exact timing, but I'm pretty sure I watched the first two seasons while s3 was airing and then caught up after - I wanted to start earlier but I had some issues finding a way to watch the show here!
My introduction to the show was via @three-drink-amy telling me to watch it (repeatedly), @clottedcreamfudge's judicious use of gifs from the show in the gc and a bunch of SC mutuals yelling about the gay howdy wee woo show on my dash every week.
Season 4 was the first season that I watched "live" which I did with @welcometololaland, both of us texting and screaming as we watched each episode together hours and hours after everyone else had.
Which season is your favorite?
Season 3, hands down. I don't know that they'll ever beat it?
Who is your favorite character? (Bonus: If you answered TK or Carlos, who is your favorite besides them?)
Other than Carlos and TK, I think it's Grace. I just adore the her energy and the way that she takes everything in her stride and even when things are hard, she's very practical about it. Also she doesn't take shit from anyone.
Top five episodes. Go!
I don't think I've ever tried to do this? I'm generally very bad at choosing, my SC fave ep list contains three episodes that I insist must be watched together so they only count as one ep hahahaha Anyway, in no particular order, and not necessarily by episode title or number because I can't be arsed looking them up:
Push, my beloved
3 x 13
the one with Lou
Bad Call
the Soulmates one
Bonus: the Marjan ep in s4 which was just so, so good
If you could pick any character to be given a "begins" episode, who would it be and what would that episode look like?
Either Nancy because we know nothing about her and I want to know, or Paul because I think he's had such an interesting journey.
What is a scenario or storyline that you would like to see in season 5?
I love @liminalmemories21's idea of a Halloween ep! It would be so fun!
We probably won't get it because of the shorter season, but I'd love more Lonestar-is-a-comedy-actually episodes like Red vs Blue and the (original) Lou arc.
More realistically, I'd love to see Carlos actually grappling with the consequences of his actions in s4 and also working through his grief and TK helping him do that. And I'd like to see an absence of Owen love interests.
What do you think is going on in this still?
I want it to be something silly like Lou 2 is lost in the loft and Carlos is Not Happy about it (the reason for TK's posture) and then he answers his phone in the middle of all of that, hence the facial expression. The phone call isn't that important, it's Owen asking Carlos for help on a side quest.
We all know about the elusive 5x05 spicy scene that has been teased, so what is your prediction for how it could possibly top 1x02?
I don't know about a prediction, but I'd love to see them getting distracted from getting ready in the morning. Carlos (in just his underwear) waking TK up with a kiss and TK pulling him back into bed for a good make out session and that turning into more. A very different vibe to 1x02 but hot nonetheless.
Where was the Tarlos honeymoon in your mind?
I think it was somewhere close to home - with the accelerated wedding timeline (lol) they didn't have time for a long trip for to somewhere far away, and by all accounts, travelling overseas wasn't on their radar anyway (see: TK's disbelief when Carlos says he wants to go to Tuscany). So a long weekend at a nice resort somewhere. Enzo paid for it as their wedding gift because he couldn't make it to the wedding when they moved the date up.
Shoutout one of your favorite fan creations.
Just one (1)? Impossible!
This Rafa fan art by @ambiguouspenny made me actually say "oh fuck" the first time I saw it. I adore the way @whatsintheboxmh uses light in all of her fan art. I love @howtosingit's Carlos episode edits because they a) let me watch all of the Tarlos scenes on repeat (and before I actually get to the watch the episodes when they air because time zones), b) give me an easy way to check canon dialogue and c) make it easy to convince new people to watch the show when they sneak into my DMs and tell me that the number of Tarlos gifs I am putting on their dash is tempting them. @liminalmemories21's Knave-verse might be my favourite Tarlos AU, everything about it makes me swoon. Okay, cutting myself off now.
Tagging: @welcometololaland @howtosingit @three-drink-amy just so they know my earlier tags in this post were tags to do this and also @lightningboltreader @orchidscript
@danieljradcliffe @guardian-angle22 @reasonandfaithinharmony @alrightbuckaroo
@cold-blooded-jelly-doughnut @nancys-braids @heartstringsduet
and anyone else who wants to play 💖
PS. if ao3 user olympia2007 is here on tumblr, I'm tagging you too (and please come say hi)
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Hugging, Kissing and Cuddling HCs for König
I'm trying to see him in another light again after everything I've seen about him, so I decided I'd write something fluffy and nice for him. And then came the realization I never wrote some HCs like these for him in my original posts, so I decided I'd change that! He's Austrian, so naturally I have to love him!
When it comes to hugging someone, König is a bit hesitant. Considering he’s not the most physically affectionate person out there, it’s almost an honor to be receiving an unprompted hug from him. Whether his hugs are long or short depends on the occasion: If he’s proud of you for accomplishing something, then the hug will be rather short lived. Though, he might pick you up and spin you around until you’re dizzy. If you’re sad and need some comfort then his hugs could last a while. He’s not the best with words, he prefers to listen to other people, but if he knows a hug is what usually helps you then he’s willing to do so. Despite being a big and strong lad his hugs are surprisingly gentle, he’s worried about crushing you. He could put his all into them, but then you’d likely end up with a few broken ribs and he doesn’t want that to happen. König is also surprisingly warm, so receiving a hug from him is a rare, but nice experience. Although he does go rigid at the beginning, not knowing what to do, but relaxes into the hug eventually.
Again, he’s not a very physically affectionate person, but isn’t opposed to the occasional peck on the cheek or on your lips either. There is some anxiety whether you’d actually want a kiss from him or not, so he doesn’t kiss you very often, even if you do reassure him that it’s quite alright. He’s a bit tense at first when he presses a kiss to your lips, but calms down eventually. It’s especially bad during the beginning of your relationship, but he’s since gotten better at being calm about it. Since there’s a good chance he’s taller than you he loves giving you a kiss on the forehead. It’s a small but sweet gesture. He doesn’t need to bend down entirely to reach you but he still gets to be affectionate with you. However, if you’re on the taller side, or just as tall as he is, then he’d love to receive kisses to his temple from you. It makes him smile every time you do it. If he’s in the mood for receiving a kiss then he’ll lay his head on your shoulder and nudge you a bit. Or try to get his head in your closer vicinity. Kind of like that one bunny video where the bunny stretches to receive some kisses.
Cuddles with him are a bit more common than hugs actually. However, he refuses to lay down on top of you. If you’re shorter and weaker than him then there’s no chance he’ll put his weight on you, he’s just that afraid of hurting you. If you’re taller or just more muscular, then he might, but he’s still a rather heavy lad. Most he’ll do is put his head on your shoulder while you’re cuddling in bed and are both lying down. Although it’d be a lie to say he doesn’t want to be held. König is alright with being the one to hold you, but sometimes he would prefer to be the little spoon as well. That urge gets especially bad if you’re roughly the same size as him. Sometimes just nuzzling into your chest does the trick for him as well, though. Loves it when you run your fingers through his hair as he does so. Another thing he adores is you sleeping on his chest as he holds you. He gets to hold you close, he gets to protect you and he gets to doze off a bit himself, it’s bliss to him. Sometimes he leans down to press a kiss to your head and accidentally wakes you up like that. He feels bad about it and apologizes profusely, but does chuckle a bit when he sees your disheveled hair and your tired expression that shows you just woke up.
#cod#cod x reader#konig#könig#konig x reader#könig x reader#he actually kind of scares me these days even if I don't want that to happen in the slightest so I'm trying to desensitize myself again#I know people always joke about fanon könig vs canon könig but I think I will write him a bit softer with his s/o again#just to combat all those awful things I've seen about him that I don't want to be true and that I also want to forget about#könig is a big lad so I knew from the beginning I wanted him to be good at hugging because this is self indulgent#I feel like if it weren't for his anxiety he'd be much much cuddlier#because that's the case with me even if I have other things going on as well#and what is a funny character you write about if not another piece of yourself?#I've put so much of myself into some of these characters and yet people keep requesting them so I must be doing something right#it's more fun that way as well when you put your characters through something you've gone through. more relatable too#but I think that's something pretty much every writer does. that's why some requests are so difficult to write#I got one about marrying Laswell and Nikolai and that was a difficult request for me because the last wedding I went to#was my parents' and that was almost 18 years ago. man time flies I was 4 years old back then#so naturally I don't remember much either. But I tried and that's what's important!#either way please enjoy this piece of fluff I wrote today!
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An Analysis of Haruka’s MVs: Distance and Disability
Hello! I’ve recently fallen down the rabbit hole that is Milgram and I have been itching to make some completely normal and sane analysis posts. My silly alternate title for this was gonna be “Things About Haruka’s MVs That Just Make Sense: A Hyperfixation-fuelled Analysis”, because honestly my autistic brain has been having a field day over here.
I am in awe with just about every single music video in this project; the animation is incredible and each one packs so much carefully laid out information. But I have been rotating Haruka’s in my head constantly since I first watched them, and I have a lot of Thoughts. Not about whether he’s guilty or innocent/forgiven or unforgiven. Not about whether or not I can justify his murders. Just some straight up imagery and symbolism analysis, through the lens of disability.
Haruka’s disability has not been specified, but I am confident we can at least say he is neurodivergent. I feel like the cultural differences in names for several things e.g. ‘learning disability’ vs ‘learning difficulty’ will just invite unnecessary drama, and is a little pedantic. What does matter here is that Haruka's experience as a disabled person is heavily intertwined within his story and his motives.
So, without further ado... let’s get into this!
Trigger warnings/TW: I will be discussing ableism, eugenics and harm towards disabled people. Everything else will be related to the music videos ‘Weakness’ and ‘All Knowing and All Agony’, so any triggering content within them may also be mentioned. Read at your own discretion and stay safe!
Disability: some brief (important) historical context
It is only within the last few decades that those who are disabled have been ‘seen’ for the first time. A modern society is (ideally) expected to be built to include and accommodate for disability, and to acknowledge disabled people’s existence. But for many countries (even the ones making steps outlined above) this is still not the case. For a very, very long time, globally, that has not been the case.
For most disabled people, society makes it very clear that they are a burden to it and are better off not existing.
I’m going to make this section as succinct as possible because...it’s heavy stuff. But it’s important, and I want you all to get the gist of what I’m saying. The weight of it.
Let’s highlight a piece of history regarding IQ and eugenics, surrounding the publication and subsequent worldwide reception of ‘The Kallikak Family: A Study in the Heredity of Feeble-mindedness’ by Henry Herbert Goddard in 1913:
“In 1927, it was used as evidence in the case of Buck v. Bell, which culminated in a Supreme Court ruling that the involuntary sterilization of ‘mentally defective’ persons was not unconstitutional in the United States. By 1938, thirty-three US states had passed laws allowing for the forced sterilization of women with learning disabilities and twenty-nine had made sterilization compulsory for people who were thought to have genetic conditions. Many European countries followed suit: Denmark in 1929, then Norway in 1934, and after that Sweden, Finland, Estonia, Iceland, Czechoslovakia, Yugoslavia, Latvia, Hungary and Turkey.”
— Limburg, J. (2021) Letters To My Weird Sisters: On Autism and Feminism, p. 126
This history of a ‘sterilization law’ includes Japan, who between 1948 and 1996 enacted the Eugenics Protection Law which “authorised the sterilization of people with intellectual disabilities, mental illnesses or hereditary disorders.” According to the government, about 25,000 were sterilized.
SO. It’s important to bring this up. To establish how much disabled people are not wanted, just from their governments. Let alone society. To this day, disabled people are hidden away from the public by families that are ashamed of their existence.
Japanese culture values collectivism, and maintaining the harmony of a group...to the extent of excluding those that don’t fit into the mould. That are different.
The question is: where do they go? The ones that are publicly rejected?
Haruka and The Curious Case of Distant Waters
Okay that’s enough of the heavy real-world stuff! Time to delve into some...*checks notes*...heavy fictional stuff. Fun!
Haruka’s MVs prominently display themes of distance and separation through the motif of water, specifically being submerged underwater.
The name Haruka reinforces this concept as the specific kanji used (遥) translates to ‘distant’, ‘remote’ or ‘far away’. As there are many, many kanji choices for the name (including but not limited to: ocean/sea, eternity/permeance, clear/distinct/obvious, and spring/growth/cherry blossom) it feels like a particularly cruel and intentional choice to go with that one.
Through the exploration of this motif, we can see the extent in which Otherness/the state of being ‘Other’ drives Haruka to great lengths to close the distance and escape it.
What I noticed throughout both MVs (particularly AK&AA but note the beginning scene of Weakness), is that whenever Haruka looks at himself in a reflective surface (e.g. the vanity mirror, the fish tank), water either begins to rise and overwhelms him, or is already there and he appears submerged:
I think this is the “All-Knowing” part of AK&AA. He knows he’s different, and he knows there’s a huge ocean between him and his peers, his family, everyone. A disconnect when trying to listen and understand, but also when trying to be understood by others and listened to himself.
You know when you submerge your head in water, and your hearing gets all muffled and incomprehensible? And have you ever tried speaking underwater? You can’t, because if you open your mouth you’ll drown. It’ll just come out as bubbles rising to the surface.
I also think the bubbles symbolise rising tension, between what he wants and what he currently has. Bubbles are everywhere in these MVs, even in places where they shouldn’t logically be? Such as this scene, following the line “don’t wipe me out, don’t wipe me out”:
Immediately pans up to Haruka gasping for breath, droplets of water rising from...somewhere. For about a split second, and they’re gone.
This boy is really going through it. I’m getting an ‘emerging from the ocean before I drown’ vibe from this one folks. When the line that follows this scene is “I can’t stop, I can’t stop”, what I’m REALLY hearing is “I can’t stop (killing) or I’ll drown”. This is his lifeboat, pulling him out from the depths of being neglected and hidden away, into the spotlight.
Some interesting images from Weakness in relation to that (of spotlights):
Anyways, onto the next point:
Blue to Orange: Water to...Nectar?
So, the orange liquid. It’s clearly representing blood, but I don’t think this is just a “danganronpa pink blood” situation of censoring/getting this video onto youtube without restrictions.
I think it’s most likely honey, specifically nectar.
The etymology of the word nectar shows its compounds translate to “death” and “overcoming”. Nectar is also called the drink of the gods, so it would make sense for it to be a ‘death-defeating’, immortalizing liquid.
For Haruka’s victims to contain nectar is very interesting. It reinforces that necessity to kill, to take the life of another, to sustain himself. To overcome the ‘living death’ he is experiencing by being hidden away from society.
This is his means of escape from drowning.
However, as we all know, things don’t turn out great for him. By the end of AK&AA Haruka is rejected once again by his mother, after which the door is shut (the light with it is gone too) and we’re met with this imagery:
The nectar floods the room, engulfing him much like the water from earlier.
There are many things we could take from this. One being that the nectar-gathering/killing-spree has clouded his vision; it’s so sweet, so sickly sweet and he’s addicted to the taste of attention, even if it’s very bad attention.
Who else has honey imagery in their MV again?
Oh, right.
Anyway, the nectar/honey situation could also be representing submerging into an even further level of distance. All that murder is gonna push people away, despite his motive being to close the gap between him and normal people. The 'ocean’ has lost clarity and become a maddening, delusional substance. After all, there is a type of honey literally called ‘mad honey’ known for its medicinal and hallucinogenic properties.
That’s enough about honey, though. Let’s move onto less unfortunate... oh, sorry, what was that? *checks notes*...Ah, yes. I meant to say, let’s move onto even more unfortunate symbolism:
The Necklace
So, this necklace. Haruka steals it from his mother’s belongings, and is his only material, physical connection to her. It is taken on the declaration of “making (her) love me again” and getting her attention once more, now he is no longer a child but a teenager closer to adulthood (at least, that’s what I consider the ‘shirt with a vest sweater and tie’ to represent. child him = the blue polo, teenager him = this one, adult him = an amalgamation of his teenager clothes).
I wasn’t sure if this was an opal or pearl/mother of pearl, but I’m leaning towards opal from the other depiction of it in Weakness:
Opals are fun because they can symbolise both good luck and bad luck, usually to do with whether it’s your birthstone. There’s something to be said of Haruka’s belief in his ‘misfortune’ and the superstition surrounding these gemstones.
But they are even more interesting for the powers they supposedly have; in medieval times the opal was considered the ‘patron of thieves’ for their ability to grant the wearer invisibility.
There is a deliciously sad irony to Haruka’s theft with that titbit of information.
Now, if this isn’t an opal, and it’s a pearl/mother of pearl there’s still some fun interpretation to be had! A little less sad, even. Pearls invoke strong imagery of the sea, of purity, and of a connection to the maternal. If this is the last thing he has relating to his mother, I can see this necklace representing a lifeline when he’s deep in the ocean. A reminder of why he’s doing all of this killing, and who it’s for.
His mother’s attention (or the idea of having a mother at all, any mother) is his driving force in life.
Speaking of that...
So We Really Need To Talk About That Fish Tank: AKA, Why Haruka’s Mom Wins ‘The Worst Parent of The Year’ Award
This fucking fish tank.
Okay, I’m gonna start by saying: I don’t think this is reading too far into things. When it takes an animation team months, sometimes years to create a 3-5 minute music video, and one as detailed as this...you don’t just wing it. There are storyboards, there are key frames and there are choices made down to the smallest of details.
From the sheer volume of animal/insect/fish décor that resides in the Sakurai household, you bet I’m gonna pay attention to what type of fish are in that fish tank.
For one thing, they live in saltwater. This is a marine tank, aka the harder choice of aquarium to have. I mean, way, WAY harder. For the experienced only.
These fish right here? One is a clownfish, and the other is a yellow boxfish.
Boxfish are a nightmare to keep alive. This article goes into more detail than I will, but all you need to know is: if there was ever a fish out of all the fish you could possibly want in your tank, this is the one to avoid like the plague.
They release deadly toxins when stressed, as a survival instinct. Boom. All your fish are dead. They need to eat a shit ton of food, but are notoriously clumsy swimmers and slow eaters. Boom. Starving, stressed out boxfish. Boxfish either dies from starvation or dies from stress and toxins.
For Haruka’s mom to have not just one of these fuckers, but a tank consisting ONLY OF MULTIPLE BOXFISH AND CLOWNFISH...
This is a high-maintenance tank. And it shows how much time and effort, how much care she puts into the things she loves.
How neglectful she is as a parent of a disabled child in contrast.
There’s something about the last scene between Haruka and his mother that reinforces this for me:
Haruka’s relationship with animals and himself: AKA, “why don’t I just become the damn fish tank?”
Let me backpedal a little bit. This subheading will make sense in a minute.
So, like I said earlier we have a lot of décor in this house relating to insects and fish. We also have a lot of pets. Both living and dead, taxidermized creatures in one household, proudly on display.
I think this may have created some confusion for Haruka regarding the value of animals being alive or dead, as in his perspective his mother values both equally. The fish in a tank may be full of alive creatures, but they’re still on display as if it’s artwork. Isn’t breaking the glass of a framed picture of a fish equal to breaking the glass of a tank with a ‘picture of living fish’?
(This isn’t to say Haruka is clueless to the impact of his actions, nor to justify any harm to animals. I just find the train of thought to be intriguing.)
So when considering these ‘objects’ are proud trophies of his work:
This is a carefully arranged display, which by the way, doesn’t contain a single fish. In fact the only piece of that moment visible here is the...large piece of driftwood? Okay. Keep that in mind.
We proceed into Haruka’s mother opening the door and seeing her son, for the first time in any of the MVs. Note the way they composed this shot:
I’m obsessed with this scene. The blue eye framing Haruka, with a literal fishbowl effect on him...
He is the goddamn fish in the aquarium now. His mother’s full attention is on him and him alone, with only the dead animals, the books, the lamp and the driftwood as window dressing to this wonderful display.
Doesn’t it just scream “Look at me! Look at what I did, mom!” to you?
That blue spotlight is on him once more. He is not just drifting deeper into an endless ocean, but contained in a vessel to be stared at.
One Last Observation
I didn’t know where to fit this in but I think the end feels appropriate.
His clothing here:
Is a frankenstein-esque mash up of clothes from his younger years. He wears this throughout AK&AA, and as I mentioned before it signifies him as an adult. However, I should clarify what I mean here as Haruka says “he thinks he’s 17″ and “doesn’t care about his age”. So... not an adult, but on the cusp of adulthood.
But I think he actually does care about his age, and quite a lot too.
This outfit feels symbolic of refusing to let go of the past, and of himself as a child. He’s literally grown out of his clothing, but he still clings onto it. He’s attached to the past because it not only contains his happiest moments, but the change from being loved to becoming neglected.
As a disabled person, you’re often treated with a lot more forgiveness when you’re younger. That is to say, some people don’t realise that children with disabilities grow up into adults with disabilities. There is a point where even support from medical and social services drops off like a cliff edge once you turn 18.
The ill-fitting clothing in this context becomes more than a reflection on Haruka’s feelings, and extends to reflecting society’s feelings on disabled adults ‘refusing to grow up’.
I don’t blame Haruka for holding onto his childhood like this. He’ll be even less publicly visible and seen once he is no longer a pitiful child, but a ‘weird’ adult in ill-fitting, children’s clothes.
#milgram#haruka sakurai#analysis#weakness#all-knowing and all-agony#symbolism#disability#*drops this onto the fandom like a ton of bricks* hi i'm new here pleasure to meet u#oh man I finally finished it... this is a very (and I mean a VERY) long post asdfghjkl#I'm pretty happy with how it turned out though! I got most of the things I wanted to say and point out down#believe it or not there was actually MORE I could've said but I think tumblr may have crashed on me if I did that lmao#particularly to do with Weakness as I focused more on AK&AA here. but anyways#I love how morally grey everyone is in this series! It makes for some really fun analysis!#it's so so nice seeing a disabled character in such a position too and not just 'is a cinnamon roll' or 'the devil reincarnate' yknow#I debated leaving in the real-world history stuff but I think it sets the tone of my analysis pretty well and shows the importance of--#--haruka's disability not as a justification of his actions but as a vital backdrop to his environment and struggles
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one thing i noticed (form personal experience and by observing other artists) is that the longer you draw and create, the more boring it gets to simply replicate references, especially when it comes to characers' fashion choices.
with bnha, i keep mine pretty simple and basic because teens ARE very trend-loyal, but mainly im just lazy lol, but when i AM motivated, i love to think about characters' personal style, what could influence them, but also more trivial things such as budget into account, which is why i love to draw Deku in basic tees or clothes provided by his school (while bakugo gets to wear ed hardy and shoto wears arcteryx). i also love to limit the items like its just more realistic to me when someone as ordinary as deku wears the same 5 crewnecks all the time
which brings me to my actual point, namely that the more frequently you draw, the more you learn to do research andto combine your findings into sth new rather than staying faithful to one reference, and i think that's what makes good art so good, being able to draw inspiratioin from all kinds of niches and creating something that feels very authentic and suspends the spectator's disbelief. sometimes i see art and i know exactly which fashion editorial or which kpop idol was referenced, and I'm not insinuating these are bad things i do that too (less frequently now but i sure did!), my point is it's kind of nice to see how ALL artist start out with rather derivative art but eventually move on to create more authentic art that is less about drawing beautiful and perfect people and more about trying to individualize them and that ALSO means giving them weird clothes, scars, asymmetric eyes, a receding hairline etc. like drawing the same beautiful character 200 times gets so boring and it's just more fun to try and make them a bit more human
#i do have a lot of fashion headcanons but i rarely actually draw like that im so lazy#and again im also still stikcing to references and sometimes pretty closely#but this is an observation that i like to think about#as i said i just love artists that draw from a big and diverse source of references and inspirations#and the same applies to other forms of art as well ofc#just because you enjoy one genre and want to write in that genre doesnt mean you should limit your knowledge and inspiration to that genre#its pretty detrimental like you have to read ALL kinds of things#otherwise it's hard NOT to create a derivative work#and you see that with a lot of mangas#like you can kinda tell which battle shonen mangkas are only into other battle shonen and which ones are well read overall#SORRY#or when people who only read fics write their first original story and its an apposition of tropes#my point is its important to dabble in all kinds of niches#dont aim for perfect skills in one niche i think its more fun and beneficial to give everything a try
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