im gonna cry why does everybody i love ditch me like this

Part 2.5

<- part 2.4

OKAY now I’m going to sleep ✨🙈✨

Sad boy hourz

That last piece was so sad 😞 please hug wren for me 😞♥️🥺

Consider Wren hugged!❤️

Hngh,,, I want an alien family,,, :((((

My final goodbye to someone I should’ve let go of earlier

When exactly did you decide that you didn't want to be my friend? I found the letters you wrote to me, saying that I was your best friend and that no matter what, we had each others backs. I always had yours but at what point did you decide that you didn't have mine? What action made you want to no longer be associated with me? At what point did those letters start being a lie? I was cleaning out my room and sorting through my letters and pictures, deciding which ones to take and which to leave behind and I found yours. I never thought that they would end up in the leave behind pile while I packed up everyone else's. I read the words you wrote and all I read were broken promises and lies. I felt dumb, how did I never notice you hated me? Maybe I wasn't as good of a friend as I thought I was or maybe I always knew, but continue to make excuses for you. I remember asking Walter why you didn't want to hang out, trying to figure it out and find ways to incorporate you into the group again. You were slipping away and I was trying desperately to drag you back into my life. Even at the end, when we first started fighting, I still trusted you. Do you remember when I told you about Ricardo at the swim meet? You were the first person I told, despite us fighting. I didn't even tell Walter or Saira, I told you. Now looking back at it, I feel dumb for thinking you'd care when at that point, you had decided you didn't want to be my friend. I have kept all of this inside of me all summer, trying my best to suppress my anger and sadness at the sudden loss of 70% of my friends, but something about those letters opened up the wound that all my unanswered questions created. I don't really care about Celeste anymore. I hear that name and I don't react, nothing positive and nothing negative, just a friendship gone sour over a boy (typical high school ending). I didn't even know Nina and Julie didn't like me anymore either, I found that out from other people telling me their insults and betrayal. But that doesn't bother me either, I expected that kind of behavior from them. But something about the way we ended has me thinking. I hear songs of broken relationships and I don't think of me and Magvern, or any romantic interest I've ever had, I think of us. At one point, you were the closest person I had. You and I have been through the worsts experiences with each other. Your heartbreaks over Celeste, my mom's cancers... I can't pinopoint where we broke. All summer, I've been going over conversations where I confront you and it hurts. I never thought that there'd be a point where I hear Matthew and I don't see a goofy image of you in a Shadow the Hedgehog in my head. Instead, a see a text message saying "Yes. I am closer to her and wanted to see her." To me, no one was closer to me than you and Walter, but to you, I was a stranger. How could you let me go on believing that we were still friends when you had decided that I was horrible and to ghost me in real life? What did I do to deserve such an incosiderate end to the era that was Matt & Fabi? Today, as I packed up my sentimental belongings to take with me to San Diego, I left behind every trace of you and the friendship of 7 years that we shared. I'm leaving home with nothing of you, I'm leaving pieces of my real friends hearts; a photobook from Walter, a photo cube from Meryl, old middle school pictures of Saira, and so many little memories I found of those who showed me this summer the love that had been absent from my life towards the end of high school. So, I guess this is a good-bye. I never expected to talk to you again, but I needed to have this communicated. This is the the product of a summer of thinking. Good-bye Matthew, I hope you're confident in the choices you made. At first, I was sad that the decisions I had made led me to losing a lot of my friends, but now, I'm glad I decided to stay true to my value of speaking my mind. I used to feel bad about always talking about UCSD, always gassing myself up for it, but after everything, I deserve it. I deserve everything good that's happened to me. You and Celeste gave me a lot of shit for being proud of getting in. Yeah I bragged a lot, but I'm a fucking success story. You've seen me at my lowest, and when I was at the height of my life, you didn't feel happy for me. I think that's when I should've known that we were doomed. But I didn't, and now we're here. While we did end badly, I have to say thank you for the good memories you did leave. Bitch Ass Yolanda St, In n Out runs, all those inside jokes. I occasionally come by something that reminds me of you and I get nostalgic, but that's done now. I'm leaving for San Diego soon and I think that has triggered all of this because I don't plan on coming back to the Valley. So to finally end all of this, I don't plan on coming back and I'm tying up loose ends. Good-bye Matthew Gosparini; I hope you're proud of the path you chose because while I was sad, I'm glad now. I'm better now without all of you who left me, I'm about to embark on the adventure of my life and you all couldn't appreciate the friendship I was so happy to give you all. Good-bye, from now on, the "you" you are now and the "Matt" in my head are two different people and "you" are a stranger while "Matt" is a bittersweet memory.

you have romantic feelings for someone right now

*   TRUE   OR   FALSE  │  ACCEPTING   │ INBOX  .

"i've  seen  what  romance  and  the  such  does  to  people..  what  it  did  for  me  and  my  family.  i  want  no  part  of  it,  and  yet..  a  part  of  me  still  lingers  and  hopes  something  will  change  that  ugly  narrative.  someone.  in  short,  i  don't  know  if  what  i  feel  is  love,  but  maybe..  there  is  someone.  i’ll  call  it  a  tentative  truth."

Stop giving all your love to people who don’t fucking deserve it

13 songs i’m currently listening to 🎶

tagged by @rumprich! thank you, love!! 💖

just friends - keshi

million days - sabai x hoang

orbit - hwasa

into you - matisse & sadko

chemicals (acoustic) - jvna

you should see me in a crown - billie eillish

moratorium - omoinotake

you're cold - heize

tabun - yoasobi

i see you - missio

nightlight - illenium

tonight - punch

uncover - seulgi (red velvet)

tagging: @hoekaashi @onefortyninecm @animoozies @und3lla @itachihaa @wuatsui @fake-charliebrown @ultkags @stardust-make-a-wish @karasu-hoes @wordswithinmoments @moonchildtsukki & whoever else wanna do it c:

!

i care about her and her only

reagan help I am absolute DOODOO at the game and I don’t understand HFJSHDH

what about buck getting a call to say one of his parents died and him not knowing how to feel because they weren’t the best parents and he’s resented them for most of his life for what they put him through but they’re still his parents and he can’t help but love them and so he also kinda feels a little guilty/sad because he wasted the last few years not speaking to them and now he’s never gunna get that missed time back and just a whole lot of conflicting feelings for him

i dont like this :((((((( buck being jus kinda numb and rly quiet for a while cause he just has no idea how to feel. buck debating whether or not he should go to the funeral bc on one hand, theyre his Parents, but on the other hand, him and his parents never rly saw eye to eye. buck talking to maddie abt how he feels, asking if shes gonna go to the funeral, cause if Shes going, then maybe he’ll feel less nervous abt going. buck never rly crying abt it, jus sorta feeling strange and floaty :(((

Part 2.4 ( Chester is having a heart attack😩)

<- part 2.3

Next part ->

Oh my heart, it's a fish out of water

Oh my heart, it's a rock in the gutter

Oh my heart, it's a black in a rainbow

Oh my heart, it's so damn cold

And I throw my heart into the fire

'Cause I want to set my heart on fire

And I watch it try befriending embers

But the ice don't melt in mid December

:/ im so torn between actually wanting to go to college bc im tired of how my life currently is and not wanting to go because it’ll be such a major change plus a financial mess

Hello hello!! Might you have any BenaPuff headcanons? If not, just some Benatar headcanons perhaps?

OK SO I RARELY END UP LIKING BENAPUFF BUT I HAVE *ONE* LONG HC FOR IT AND ITZ THE ONLY WAY I CAN SEE IT HAPPENING- - Ben and Puff play gay chicken in highschool (yknow that one game where if u chicken out of kissing the other dude, ur the gay one) Benatar can’t finish the game so he getz called gay and itz sad boi hourz for him - thats the only way puff actually figures out his feelings but hes like “thats a problem for another day, im straight lol”  and continues making fun of ben like the rest of the gang - so uhh slowburn moment - confession scene be like “hey remember in highschool when we played gay chicken-” Benatar has no wordz :| ANYWAY BENATAR TIME BECAUSE COMFORT CHARACTER GO BRR (I bully him, he has no rights here/j) - hc that he has those stupid ugly emo bangs is cuz he has a lazy eye and doesnt wanna be picked on more, more evidence for this hc is from Tig Ol Bitties where he only covers one eye (i assume the lazy one lol) - was super talkative in highschool, someone asked why he talked so much and he never spoke again hadvfsd-

 - his legs snap in literally every animation from era 2 (after studio ladybug was fired rip) so yknow my boy got that calcium deficiency

  - this is rlly simple but his fav colours blue - that being said, he only eats cool ranch Doritos specifically Because they are blue

  - his keytar is a comfort item since he literally never lets go of it, and he got his dads tie when he was moving out so he always wears it  - his mom taught him piano, she was nice about it (unlike mY mom smhh) - got a piercing on the “straight” ear in hs, found out later he wasnt and realized it was all for nothing - grew up in a conservative catholic household, ended up emo (his mom freaked when he got a piercing so he was never allowed to get anymore), has a younger sister!! she is a gremlin and he does not like her :// - AXEL WAS HIS FRIEND FROM CHILDHOOD CUZ THEIR MOMS KNEW EACH OTHER AND THATS WHY THEY LOOKED SO SIMILAR IN GEN ONE CUZ THEY WERE BOTH JUST COPYING EACH OTHER (they are besties and you cant prove me otherwise)

- he is incelcore im sorry, if yfm was made in 2021 he would be browsing reddit - he’s bi cuz self projection - no one lets him cook, he can cook, but brits arent allowed in the kitchen (and most of the band worries he might snap one day and poison them) - what if i told you he’s actually not british and got his accent from watching british television as a child (this ones a joke but its funny to think about)