Tumgik
#[ when i say almost non-stop-- i mean i don't eat until like late afternoon and i call it dinner. ]
iniziare · 1 year
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Shady’s back, tell a friend— god, it feels good to type on a regular keyboard again, behind, guess what, behind the third-biggest babe in my life, my desktop computer. I don’t know what it says about me that I put so much value in a stationary computer, does it make me more of a boomer? I sure hope so. Anyway, she is installed and while we’re still waiting on internet, my phone is being used as the common hotspot in the apartment and the signal is pretty strong, so apart from work preparations, maybe it’ll also allow me to set up some things because I’ve started a Game of Thrones rewatch; I miss my books. But also, this boomer misses dodging bullets here (and writing too, I guess).
Aka, hi, we’re in our apartment— I have almost forgotten to cook/eat every day for 4 days now, because I’ve been single-handedly at war with one really greasy kitchen. Two more cabinets to go, folks, then I will know some kind of peace (translation: save me, my back is absolutely killing me, and I’ve been, mostly, suffering in silence).
#[ out of character. ] whatever. i don't really care. i'm just gonna sit this one out.#[ aka; this apartment was inhabited by i believe two guys. ]#[ you can tell. ]#[ that's all i'll say. ]#[ ... no i actually have a lot to say. the toilet smells like one you'd find in a gas station. ]#[ and we're unsure what happened there-- so we're gonna nuke it with products. we haven't yet decided what products. ]#[ the entire apartment feels like one that has been decently heavily smoked in but doesn't smell like it. ]#[ or not anymore any way. ]#[ it's that residue-- it's similar to caked on dust feeling greasy? except it's on places where caked on dust just... doesn't stay. ]#[ also the kitchen was gross. it looked fine on the surface but holy shit i've had to do a lot of cleaning. ]#[ when i say almost non-stop-- i mean i don't eat until like late afternoon and i call it dinner. ]#[ i just can't focus on anything other than this damn kitchen with all of its wonderful storage that i'll happily use once it's all cLEAN. ]#[ guys pls send help. i need help-- i can't do this alone even though i've been doing it alone. ]#[ /breathes. ]#[ i will sleep and finish it tomorrow. then i gotta get a steam cleaner for these floors and tackle those with it and a vacuum. ]#[ i love the apartment a lot but /holy shit. ]#[ my back. :( ]#[ and i'm waiting on my bedding so i can properly sleep-- in a bed... i will sleep for 24 hours. ]#[ hi; welcome to me returning but also-- welcome to my burnout and also my cleaning woes. ]
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mosshead-lover · 3 years
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The Snowflake & The Kitten
Shoto x Reader
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Summary: It’s your first Christmas with the Icyhot. You know he shows little or no enthusiasm in the holidays. How will it end up after you go against your instincts and decide spend the Eve with him.
A/n: Hey y’all! Hope you had a fabulous Christmas. I wanted to post this in time for Christmas, but my lazy ass was well..busy procrastinating. Any ho, I'm a Lil late, but hope you like the Present :D
It was late evening, and you were strolling through the streets, slower than usual, observing the decorations on the buildings and homes. Christmas sure brightened up your otherwise mundane city. You go back to wondering the same thing that's been in your mind for so long, whether you should get him something and if yes, what should you? It's been almost ten months since you and Shoto started going out. If you had to point out one thing that you not necessarily liked about him(not until recently), it would be how minimal Shoto's reactions or expressions were, almost all the time. It just made it really difficult to gauge his likeness or dislike-ness towards something. It was hardly a problem or something that bothered you until you had to pick a gift for him.
*Buzz Buzz*
You have a new text message.
Jirou: Yo! Coming?
Y/n: Will be there in 5 min.
Jirou always played her gigs to you before she actually performed. This had become a ritual more of. You started walking faster, paying lesser attention to the decorations along the way.
Jirou rocked it, as usual.
"Are you sure you don't want to join?"
You Jirou and few other girls in the class who couldn't go home for the holidays had planned a night out. Jirou still couldn't digest that you were missing it. Her reaction was only normal considering the enthusiasm your boyfriend had towards holidays.
'I want to spend the holidays productively,'
is what he had told the last time holidays came up in one of your conversations.
"Yes." You replied with a hint of uncertainty.
"At least buy a tree and some decorations on the way. Pretty sure he wouldn't have put one up." Jirou sighed.
"You don't know that!" You defended, regretting it a second later.
Jirou shrugged.
Your head was filled with ambiguity. You knew Jirou wasn't the kind who joked around or even talked much. You knew there was weight to whatever she said. You draw the cell phone and type a quick message.
y/n: Hey, I am on the way and stopped by to get a tree. What size do you prefer?
*Buzz Buzz*
Doki: What tree?
You despised Jirou for a second for being so accurate. Was not bothering Shoto with the pressure of celebrating the best gift you could give? You wondered if it was too late to join the other girls.
Doki: Oh, I see. Whatever works for you.
You picked a tree small enough for you to carry and some decorations along with candy canes. You had forgotten about the Christmas present for him until you came across the headband section with cute cat ears. You bought a white one and read one. At the billing counter, you struggled, You still had time to put it all back. Maybe just have dinner and watch a movie like any other weekend and not bother your not-so-festive boyfriend. But, you made up your mind. There was no turning back now.
--
"Hi, y/n."
Shoto helped you with the shopping bags and the tree. You reluctantly unzipped your bag and took a white sweater out. It matched the one you were wearing. The couple-Christmas-sweaters that you drunk ordered three months ago. Before you could say anything, He checks the time and,
"Hey, the webinar that I was supposed to attend this afternoon? They postponed it to seven. It will take an hour, Hardly, okay? I'm sorry, but I hope you understand."
He rushed through his sentences.
"Oh! This is for me? Thank you"
He grabbed the sweater from your hands, pecked your cheek, and hurried to his room.
You crashed into the couch. He didn't even notice that you were wearing the same sweater. You sulked and buried your face in the couch pillow and let out an inaudible scream. You took a deep breath and reminded yourself why you wanted to do this in the first place. It was your first Christmas together. You had to make it memorable for both of you. Moreover, Shoto never got together with his family to celebrate anything. You couldn't blame him for not getting excited about the festival.
You decided to look at the brighter side of it. You had an hour to make the house Christmas friendly. You went and bought some more lights and bells, set up a tree, put the lights around. You had to go to his room a few times to get the stapler, tape etc., He didn't mind. You had time to modify the cat ears as well. You removed one of the ears and carefully sewed the other color ear to match his hair color. You took one last look at the setup. It wasn't much, but it was a pleasant sight. It was almost ten. He wasn't done yet. You were too hungry to cook, you'd end up eating, and eating without him was the last thing you wanted to do. You decided to stay away from the kitchen. You fired up the TV and started surfing through the channels. Another hour passed. You gave up and went to the kitchen to fix yourself a cup of coffee. You were too sleepy and didn't want to doze off.
Finally, after what seemed like forever, you heard his door open. You set your coffee aside and sat up. He was wearing the sweater. He wore an apologetic face that transformed into a delight when he saw the tree.
"There is .. on your.."
Before you could process what he was implying, he bent down and cleared the foam mustache above your lips with a kiss.
"Coffee? at this hour?"
Shoto spoke up softly as he settled down next to you.
"I had to stay up, so..
”Did you eat?” He sounded tired too.
"No..I.."
He widened his eyes as a mother would, reacting to her kids skipping meals.
'Wait a minute, I am the one who should be mad!' You shouted on the inside.
"That was one heck of a long webinar." You comment, trying to suppress everything that you were feeling.
"I know." He acknowledges and takes you by your arm to make you sit on his lap. You put your legs on either side and sit on him, facing him.
"The fact that you were here, waiting, made it even more difficult for me." he continued as he wrapped his arms around your waist.
The sincerity in his voice was something you could never bypass and stay mad at him even if you wanted to.
"I am sorry."
"You are forgiven," you murmur and begin arranging his bangs. His face was ever charming against the constantly changing TV lights.
You both stayed there for a while, making out. You might have, longer if it wasn't for your grumbling stomach.
"You think that Soba place will still be open?"
You both go out and eat stomach full. Shoto offered to hold your hand on the way back. You were surprised as he never did that before. He always stayed away from PDA.
"It's too cold. I'm just keeping you warm." He justified.
"Besides, this way, there is a higher chance of people noticing that we are twinning."
You felt warmer as his heterochromatic eyes met yours. Your eyes dilated further at the sight of his tender smile. It was almost midnight when you reached home.
"Hey, It's almost Christmas." You squeak. You weren't worried about him being non-festive anymore. He reacts with an equally encouraging smile. As the clock struck twelve, you swing your arms around him and raise your toes, he helps by lifting you a bit, you kiss and wish him a merry Christmas.
"Merry Christmas to you too, y/n" He kisses you back and puts you down, gently.
"Hold on." He said and rushes into his room. He came back with two tiny boxes and placed them under the tree.
"Too Late?" You nod and join him to near the tree.
"Open!" his excitement was palpable. You carefully unwrapped the first box and saw a tiny glass slab covered in transparent resin shaped like a cuboid that was decorated to look like a charm.
On further inspection, you realized what was inside was a slide. You bought it closer to your eyes and tried to make out what was inside.
Shoto handed you a magnifying glass.
"Doki, Is this a ...?"
"Yes." He sounded proud.
"A real ...?"
"Yes."
You were awestruck.
"I didn't know Snowflakes can be preserved like this!"
You finally took your eyes off the charm and looked at him.
"Apparently, we can."He beamed a brighter smile, soaking in every inch of your reaction.
”And this way, an important part of me will always stay close to you."
He meant it. It was obvious from his tone and expression.
The present had exceeded all of your expectations. It was thoughtful, symbolized much more than Christmas. It was perfect. You were left speechless.
Shoto handed you the second box. Your vision blur from teary eyes. You managed to stop the tears and open it. It was a silver snowflake bracelet.
Shoto went on to explain it.
"Since the actual one is quite delicate and I couldn't morph it into a bracelet like I wanted to, I got this too, you know a ..."
You interrupted him the midway with a kiss, followed by another, and another.
He returns all your kisses with equal passion and holds you close.
He reaches out to grab his gift, you push away his hand, and take the present away from the tree. You felt so stupid. You were flustered with embarrassment suddenly.
"Hey, let me see it." He complains.
"No!" You exclaim and hide it behind your back.
"Why not?" He was confused.
"B..B...Because... It’s is not for you!"
"What?" He chuckles.
"Y/n... Are you sheltering someone else here without my knowledge?" He narrowed his eyes to look serious.
"Wh..what...No...I mean.."
Shoto pounced upon you and snatched the gift while you were in a state of confusion. You tried to snatch it back, but it was too late.
"Cat ears?" Shoto turned it back and forth, inspecting the band.
"Looks adorable. Should I put it on?" He asks innocently. You nod, still looking down.
"Like this?" You finally look up, and all your unworthy feeling lifts that just how adorable he looked. He smiles and brings his palms closer to his cheeks, trying to imitate a kitten. You almost had a nose bleed. Your reactions must have been so obvious, for he burst out laughing.
"Here, you try it on."
"No! don't you dare take 'em off!" You warn him.
"There is an extra pair." You beam ear to ear and get the other one. Of course, you had enough time to mend the other set.
After you pet each other, you take a bunch of photos together, you took his solo shots. Near the tree, in the kitchen, in front of the door, in the bedroom. You wanted to take a couple more, but you decided against it, reading the growing annoyance in his face.
Then you both sat by the tree, checking the cards he received. You were honestly a bit shocked to know he never went through them.
"Wow. Isn't this your sister?"
"Yes. and her Boyfriend." he eyes at the photo and gets back to his phone.
"They look so cute together!"
You were a little annoyed he wasn't paying attention to the cards. You snatch the phone to find him looking at the cat-ear pictures of you both.
"I think we look better." He states, unaffected by your barbaric snatching.
”We should use one of these pictures to send out cards”
You ruffle his hair and giggle, not because of the comments he just made. But because he could make such cheesy statements with a straight face.
Suddenly, you couldn't recall why you were worked up the whole day.
”Hey”
Shoto breaks the silence. You were on the couch, sitting between his limbs, as he wrapped his hands around you, warming you up and letting you rest on his chest.
”Um?”
”We should do this every Christmas”
”Do what?”
”You know, the tree, the matching sweaters, the cards...”
You chuckle.
”We will, Doki”
’Oh My baby Kitten, this is how Christmas is supposed to be!’
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saikostories · 3 years
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MHA - Enough
"ACID BLANKET!"
"RECIPRO BLAST!"
"TENEBROUS ABYSS BODY!"
The training room was bursting with everything from flames to acid as Class 1-A pushed themselves to train for the Provisional License Exams. The students were putting everything they had into working for the exams, ignoring their exhaustion and weaknesses to achieve their goal.
"DETROIT… SMMAAAAAAAASHHHHH…!"
Izuku splintered for what seemed to be the hundredth rock that day with the sole of his foot, sweat dripping heavily from his forehead. He'd been training all day, even before it had officially started. To become the hero he'd wanted to be for his entire life, he had to put his entire soul and body into this. He had to get his license to fulfill his dream of becoming a hero. There was no other option.
"You're getting better, Midoriya." All Might's voice wafted up from beneath the rock Izuku was standing on. The student looked down to see his former teacher staring up at him. "Good work."
"Thanks…" He was panting and out of breath, but he was so excited about what he'd been practicing that he continued on. "I've been studying the force and trajectory of my foot… as it travels through the air… considering my quirk's extra power… and body mass… to find the most efficient way to destroy the targets… without harming myself or my costume… and also-"
"Midoriya, you really need to work on that muttering."
"Huh? Oh… s-sorry, All Might, I don't… even realize I'm doing it out loud… till someone tells me, heheh…"
"I see." He paused. "You seem out of breath. You've been working hard?"
"Yeah…" Izuku swiped his sweaty brow. He would really kill for a water break about now, but he didn't want to rest just yet. There was still so much he needed to work on. "Training late last night… and I woke up early, too."
All Might smiled. "That's very 'plus ultra' of you," he chuckled. "But… in all seriousness, make sure you're not working yourself too hard. Good health comes before training any day."
"In order to get my license, I have to work harder, All Might. I have to do better than I am now or I won't be good enough. I'm going to push myself in these last weeks. I have to."
All Might hesitated, clearly wanting to object but acknowledging the truth in his words. "True, you're going to face some tough challenges in these exams. I'm proud of your hard work thus far. Keep it up and you'll be sure to get through this."
"Thanks; I will!"
Izuku soon returned to his training as All Might moved onto another student. His focused his newfound energy into kicks that were twice as powerful than before. It stung, but that was the price for getting his license. A price he was will to pay.
He had to work harder, even if All Might might not like it. Because, his mentor had spoken the truth, even if he hadn't realized it.
Keep it up and you'll be sure to get through this.
"I can do this," he whispered to himself, clenching his fist, "to be a hero!"
He sucked in a breath, trying to compose himself before another foot smash (I really need to name that move, already). His body ached with hours upon hours of exertion and no break, but he drilled his mind to focus on the task at hand.
Heroes didn't give up because they were tired. If he was going to be able to help people, he had to spend every moment his time proving he could do it. Proving he could be the symbol of peace. Proving he was enough.
"MISSOURI… SMMMAAAAAAASSSHHH!"
No matter what it took.
"My whole body hurts," Uraraka whined as she wandered up to Izuku. Training had just been let out for the afternoon, room taken over by Class B. "I don't know about you, but I'm starving. I'm ready to eat something and then relax for the rest of the day."
It sounded tempting. But, Izuku looked back at the training course the new students were beginning to train on. They were filled with an energy and potential Izuku was scared he wasn't able to compete with,
If I'm gonna win these exams, I have to step up my game. No time for breaks.
"You go ahead," he suggested. "I might do a little more training. I can catch up with you guys later."
"Even more? We've worked hard all morning," Iida approached his talking friends, expression troubled.
"Yeah. I just want to be ready for the exams." Because, in all honesty, he was really doubting himself and his abilities right now.
Uraraka frowned. She looked a little worried for him. "Are you sure? I think maybe you should just take a break. Everyone needs to sometime, and you can always come back later!"
Izuku smiled at her concern. "I'll be fine, Uraraka. Really. You guys go eat lunch, I'll meet up later." He was hungry, too, but the thought of getting in even more training hours was more appetizing. I have to get that license.
"If you say so. Just… don't overdo yourself, okay?"
"Okay." Why did everyone keep on saying that to him?
Iida and Uraraka left, and after a quick swig of water, Izuku moved from the training room to the yard. He'd practice outside for now.
The rest of the day, he more or less spent training. By evening, he was worn out from all the exercising he'd done, but he felt good overall. Stronger. Smarter. If he kept at this, he'd be so much better by the time the exams rolled around.
I'll just work hard in these last few weeks, he promised himself. Harder than I ever have in my life. If I want to be a hero… I have to be good enough!
Energy levels boosting his determination at that moment, he didn't really take into account what "enough" even was. Or if, when he got there, he'd be satisfied…
Izuku struck to a strict schedule throughout the fifteen days he had left before the exams.
Mornings, he'd always wake up at five and start to stretch in his room. He'd begin exercising at six, not even using All For One; he wanted his whole body stronger, not just his powers. He didn't know what he'd be faced with in the coming trials. At seven thirty, he'd be so pumped up to actually train by then that he'd sneak downstairs and practice his moves outside (forgoing his thundering, verbal "smashes").
Official training started at nine thirty, and he was always eager to start. He appreciated his teachers' comments, as they helped him get better as they criticized his moves from an outsider's view.
And getting better was good. It was the best thing he could hope for.
Around eleven, sometimes he'd start to realize he'd skipped breakfast. He didn't mean to, per se, but sometimes he was just so excited to train that he forgot to sit down and eat something. As the days rolled on, it turned into more of him being too tired to go downstairs than anything else, however.
Well… he could be faster on an empty stomach, right?
When training ended, his friends would all head to lunch. Izuku would usually make some lame excuse about having a big breakfast, or that All Might wanted to speak with him about his training and he had to stay behind - either way, he never followed them. He would always slink off to the courtyard, any faults he believed he might have needing to be improved right away. He practiced everything from super moves to long distance running, traveling across campus and sometimes even to town. He trained all day around his classes, blood pumping with non stop adrenaline.
He felt like he was flying at times. He just hoped he wouldn't crash anytime soon.
When he finally got back to his room, he immediately crashed on his bed, exhausted. He often fell asleep around twelve or one AM. But, the need to get even more exercising in woke him up earlier and earlier each day, like an itch he could only scratch by moving around. He was almost addicted to it, literally not able to sleep at this point, even though he was tired. His brain was just too wired up to rest. So, he woke up every morning and did it all over again.
And he would train.
And train.
And train.
And that was his sole priority. Who cared about whether he was getting barely one meal in a day? Who cared that he was sleeping for only a couple hours each night? Who cared that somedays his energy broke through the roof and some days he felt on the verge of collapse?
He didn't. He couldn't.
He ignored his body's suffering because he could, and didn't care about the possible damage he was doing to himself. There were more important things to be concerned about.
Izuku's friends were getting worried about him, though. He was good at hiding his troubles, but even he couldn't hide his exhausted face. By day four (yes, he was keeping track), they started to mention his weary looks until it became almost a daily routine.
"You're as pale as a ghost, Midoriya," Todoroki would say to him soberly as the class marched off to training in the mornings.
"Are you shaking now?" Uraraka would tell him worriedly, brow creased as she took in his figure, which was slumping a little more every day with fatigue.
"It would be wise to take a break," Iida would suggest after Izuku told him he was going to town for a jog for the fifth time in three days.
Even Bakugo seemed to take notice his withering state, on day seven sneering, "Maybe today will be the day you finally pass out."
He always made some excuse that would eventually satisfy them, but he was growing frustrated with this. Come on, how bad could he really look? He felt fine (well, most of the time) - in fact, he felt like he was soaring above all his troubles as he was able to accomplish so much in so little time.
But, he once looked in the mirror and was surprised at what he saw. A pale face sagging with exhaustion. Hair that was dirty and without its usual shine. Dark purple bags lying underneath bloodshot eyes.
A part of him knew he should stop. But, his sleep-deprivation made it hard to think as clearly as he would've and he didn't think he had done enough, yet… after all, the exams were just around the corner. He only had to continue like this till then. Six more days.
He could do that. He nodded as he sucked in a breath. I can do it.
Because he had now time to do everything he wanted to.
The only thing he didn't was to relax.
Before he knew it, the end of another week was approaching. The exams were only in a few days (it was day twelve), and Aizawa had suggested they all show off their news skills to their classmates to "attempt to boost their stamina in preparation for what was yet to come." Class 1-A was extremely excited about the idea, everyone eager to boast their moves they had been working hard on.
Everyone except Izuku, that was. He thought he'd jump up from bed this morning, ready to continue on in the tireless way he had pushed on with for eleven days…
...Except, when he woke up, he had felt awful. Incredibly, horribly, cripplingly awful. That was the best word for the way he felt he could think of. It was as if the effects of not sleeping or eating well for days on end had finally caught up to him. As the class excitedly made their way to the training course, he had to almost drag himself there, exhausted and trembling with soreness. His head felt awfully dizzy, to top it off. Sometimes, he saw black spots nibble at the edges of his vision.
"We'll go in the alphabetical order of your names," Aizawa said as they approached one of the training platforms. "Do your moves swiftly as possible; I still want some time for real training after this. Ashido, you're up first."
"YES, WAHOO!"
Izuku cringed at her loud voice, abnormally sensitive. Would it kill her to be a little quieter…?
Everyone watched in awe as their pink-skinned classmate showed them her new move - the incredible 'Acid Veil'. She got a round of enthusiastic applause, and then another student hurried to take her place.
As the remaining class all waited in line for their turns, a nearby Uraraka turned her head to say something to Izuku, but her brows suddenly lifted in surprise. He was too tired to think of what she could be looking at, and squinted in confusion.
"Wow, Deku… you're sweating a lot!"
Izuku was just as startled as she was to find strings of sweat soaking his face and neck. "O-oh… I guess I am." I'm not even hot, though, I'm pretty cold, actually… He shivered, and involuntarily rubbed his arms. It was then he realized he was already trembling.
"Are you okay? You've been training… a lot this week. You must be pretty tired."
"No, actually, I'm fine." Liar. He'd barely slept twelve hours this week combined. His body was visibly slack with exhaustion. Though his muscles felt stronger, they were also sore from overuse, causing his body to quiver at the strain of having to use them.
Uraraka gave him a suspicious look that soon faded into worry. "Deku… I wasn't going to say anything earlier, but you're looking worse today… I didn't see you at breakfast this morning, though - did you get to eat something in your dorm?"
"Um… probably. I can't really remember." No, he hadn't eaten anything. He'd been exercising in his room hours before the others had woken up, and had forgotten to grab something on the way out. That must've been the cause of his hollow stomach. His head was also pounding at him with a killer headache…
"You haven't made yourself sick, have you?"
"Of - of course not! I'm just a little tired…"
Unamused at his continued claims, Uraraka leaned forward, and before Izuku had time to stop her, she had placed a hand on his forehead as she checked for a fever. He tried to twist away, but she persisted.
"Uraraka…!"
"No! I… Deku…!" She pulled away, speechless and visibly horrified. "You're burning up! Why wouldn't you tell anyone you were sick?! We could've helped you earlier!"
"But, I… I'm not!" However, he felt awful enough right now to believe it. "You're probably just imagining it…"
"Deku, I know you don't believe me, but you feel like you're on fire! Here-" She jerked her head to the side and touched her nearest classmate's shoulder. "Todoroki, feel his forehead; he has a temperature probably as hot as your flames!"
"Wha… no, I don - Todoroki, come on, why can't you be on my side?"
"Uraraka's right," Todoroki said seriously, pulling his hand away from Izuku's feverish brow. "I know heat. You have a bad fever, Midoriya. You should really get some rest or at least take some medicine."
"I'm fine," Izuku said through gritted teeth. He didn't want to snap at them, but he was so tired and their worry made him feel guilty. "I have to do this… I mean… one small fever isn't going to…" He had to stop talking for a second as a wave of dizziness swept over him, causing him to hunch over slightly.
"Deku? Deku, are you alright?!"
"Your turn, Midoriya," Aizawa said dryly before he could answer. Already? I had hoped for a little more time to gather myself… "Show us what you've been working on."
Uraraka shook her head. "Mr. Aizawa, he can't, he's-"
"More than ready." Izuku was able to force his slouched body to stand up straight. He met his friend's eyes, letting her know he wasn't backing down. "I'm fine," he said quietly to her. "I'm going up there."
"Deku, no you're not! Please, just look at yourself… You've got a raging fever probably making it hard to think right now, but you're shaking all over, and you look like you're going to pass out!"
"Do I need to mark you as incomplete, Midoriya?" Aizawa snapped. He couldn't hear their conversation, but clearly saw his students talking together, and that meant wasting time.
Izuku head turned towards his teacher. His pale face seemed even more translucent than earlier. "N-no! I'm ready… hold on…" He approached the rocky platform before his friends could intervene. He was doing this - and no one could stop him.
But I'm shaking, he thought, watching his arm tremor under the strain of overworking his body. And I do feel kind of lightheaded…
The tougher part of him was quick to object. Heroes wouldn't stop because they didn't feel well. When All Might or other heroes are sick, they don't back off.
That was true.
He had to keep going. He'd already gone this far.
He climbed onto the platform, by now, sweating like crazy and head spinning. He ignored it. He couldn't stop now after all he'd done… haven't I thought this five times by now…?
"Midoriya? Are you ready?"
"Yes… I'm… I'm ready, Mr. Aizawa." He was clenching his teeth. He mentally told himself to stop it. "So… I've been working on my k-kick… and it's been going pretty well so far…"
He turned towards the rock pile on his left. The sudden motion left his brain reeling, and he had to pause for a moment as his body tried to function, frozen in place.
"Midoriya, this is getting quite ridiculous. Are you going to show us what you've been doing or not?"
Fueled with panic at his teacher's words, Izuku sparked All For One in preparation for his kick, even though he knew something was wrong with him. He couldn't think about the consequences right now. "Y-yes, I'm ready! I promise!" He composed himself in determination.
You've been working all week for this. Stop getting distracted. You can do this.
Letting All For One pulse throughout his body, he leapt up in the air, sailing towards the rocks. His head pounded in warning, telling him to stop, screaming that he'd done way too much already…
He didn't listen. He felt his heart begin to explode against his chest.
No. I have to be… enough…!
"DETROIT… SMMAAAaaAAaa…aa…"
His vision flickered as a roaring in his ears clouded his head. Distantly, he felt All For One begin to die out, and then finally cease to work, having been strained far too much over the past week - but he was still in the air.
Without support, he felt his suspended body begin to drop.
And Izuku couldn't do a thing. Gosh, he was so tired. He didn't have an ounce of energy left to move a muscle to save himself. He didn't feel like it, either. He'd failed. Why o on?
"...MIDORIYA…!"
"Somebo - atch him, he - go - na fa-...!"
Defeated, his eyes fell closed as he plummeted. He gave up.
I'm sorry. I guess I'm just not enough…
The roaring in his ears overtook him and he slipped into final unconsciousness.
It didn't feel like it lasted for long, however. The silence he'd at last been blessed with was broken as a soft, yet stern voice began to nag at him.
"Midoriya… it's time to wake up."
He groaned. No. I'm so tired… He just wanted to sleep forever.
"You've already slept in long enough. Come on, now, I'd like to speak with you…"
Wait… is that… All Might?
He squinted open his eyes, but winced as the simple action was surprisingly painful. His vision was blurry for a few seconds, but slid into focus as he slowly regained his senses. The first face he was able to see was All Might's, who was sitting in a chair next to his…
...hospital bed?
I'm in the nurse's office.
"You're awake," All Might said roughly, seeing his eyes at last peering around the room.
"I…" It was hard to talk; his mouth felt as dry as cotton. "...wa…'er?"
His mentor seemed to be very troubled about something, but he stood from the visitor's chair and picked up a glass of water from a small table beside the bed. Izuku gulped the drink down upon All Might helping him sit up and bring the cup to his lips. He realized he hadn't drank anything besides this today.
Today.
Wait. Today… today, we were training… showing off our quirks… Uraraka thought I was sick… I had… a fever…? Memories flooded back to him, and he had to take a moment to himself in order to absorb them.
"How are you feeling?" All Might asked. Izuku was lifted from his thoughts. "Do you need Recovery Girl? She wasn't able to do much for you earlier, as your being here was more exhaustion-related, but-"
"No. No… I just…" Confusion lined his brow. "I… I passed out."
"You did."
"But… now I'm here."
"You are."
"And… so are you…?"
"I am."
Izuku chewed on his lip. "Er… it's really good to see you…" He took in a short breath. "...but, um… what are you doing here? And… how'd I get even here?"
"I came to see you, of course. Aizawa told me you collapsed during training, and though a student was able to catch you before you hit the ground, you remained unconscious. You were brought here shortly after." He glanced at the door. "Your friends are all waiting out there, but Aizawa and I both thought you would want some time alone before visitors came inside to see you."
Izuku's head reeled with this new information. Fatigued, he was still processing things slowly. "Oh. Thanks."
There was a long pause in which All Might simply stared at him. His student grew uncomfortable under his gaze, feeling guilty as if he'd done something wrong, but couldn't quite place his finger on exactly what he was in trouble for.
"Do you know what karoshi is?" All Might at last demanded, breaking the silence.
"Um... it sounds kind of familiar." He was so tired, he couldn't remember the exact meaning of it. He recognized the roots of it, though... "work" and "death"...?
"Karoshi was a term created in Japan many years ago. It literally means 'overwork death.' If this happens so much in our country, we have a name for it, then can't you see that this is serious? That you… doing this to yourself… is serious?"
Oh. So, this is where he was going with this. "A-All Might… I've just been working hard… it's not like-"
"You managed to hide it well, but today you showed everyone how poorly you were coping. Midoriya, I don't… By pushing - no, destroying your limits, you could've not only diminished your powers, but you could've also died."
Izuku didn't like the seriousness throbbing in his words. All Might was never this… hard with him.
"Die?"
"You could probably last a little longer on this path; maybe a few months. Maybe even a whole year if you're driven enough. And then, one day, you'd collapse again. Just like this. Except, next time, you wouldn't wake up in the hospital."
Izuku swallowed.
"You wouldn't wake up at all."
"I… I wasn't trying to…"
"Please, young Midoriya… I'm trying to make you understand the significance of the situation. I maxed myself out so much I eventually lost my abilities because of it, and it was all due to the fact I worked too hard. I pushed myself beyond my limits - and though I thought I was doing the right thing, I'm now unable to save another person in my lifetime." He sighed, leaning forward and rubbing his temples. "Your hard work is admirable, Midoriya; but there is a time when going 'plus ultra' and simply overdoing it begin to blur. This has gotten far out of hand."
"...but, it's just, the exams-"
"-will be fine. You were already doing so well before this extra training. This just exhausted yourself. I don't care what Aizawa says. I don't want the new symbol of peace overworking himself like this again, do you understand me?"
Izuku pushed himself up on the bed, but quickly regretted it as his head gave a painful throb. "If I'm going to be the symbol of peace, I have to go beyond! I don't - I can't care about what it does to me. I want to be a hero."
"This… is not the way!" All Might's expression was exasperated. "Do you really believe you can continue like this? Surviving on three, four hours of sleep a night, one meal a day, and a fever blurring your sense of reality?"
Izuku was about to protest, but he stopped short as All Might's words begin to sink in. Can I really do this forever? I collapsed after only a week... how am I supposed to do it for months without break? And did that mean… he didn't have the strength to be a hero?His tensed shoulders slackened. "I just… I-I want to be like you… so bad..."
The familiar Midoriya waterworks were turned on as all the feelings he'd bottled up this week surfaced at last. He had to hide his face from All Might, embarrassed.
Suddenly, he felt a hand rest on his shoulder. He forced himself to stop crying, bracing himself for a typical berating speech from All Might telling him to cease his tears and push through his exhaustion if he wanted to be a hero.
But, it never came.
"Midoriya," All Might said softly, "whether or not you become the symbol of peace is not my greatest concern."
"I… what?"
"I've been hard on you today… but not because I'm angry at you. I was just so worried. I don't want you to end up like me. I want to see you live and be happy and avoid the mistakes I made." He shook his head. "My greatest concern right now is you. Not the successor of One For All. Not an aspiring hero at U.A. High. You. Izuku Midoriya, the boy who would do anything to help people."
A little color returned to Izuku's cheeks.
"Just a little while ago, I promised your mother I'd look after you, and yet I stood by and I let you do this to yourself. But, no more, alright? I can't bear to watch this happen to you. Not only is it unhealthy, it's a horrible thing to watch your protégé killing themself before your very own eyes. When I heard that you had collapsed, I feared…"
Izuku looked up at his teacher. He always looked serious in this form, but now, he just looked sad.
All Might truly cared about him. He was worried about him.
Izuku was exhausted and trembling with dozens of different emotions right then, but he was able to think clear enough to realize that All Might… was right.
All this pushing himself wasn't necessary. He was, more or less… enough. His abilities were enough. He didn't need to kill himself to become a hero; he just had to do his best. Had to know exactly what he was working towards. He wasn't training to become the License Exam champion. He was trying to become a hero.
And heroes didn't destroy themselves. Because people still needed them. And if I keep going like this, I won't be around for the people that need me.
"I'm... I'm so sorry for worrying you, All Might," he sniffed. "You're right. I can't do this forever, and I can't be a hero if I die. I was wrong. I've made a lot of mistakes these past weeks. But…"
His pale lips turned upwards into a small smile.
"I think now… I'm ready for the exams. I've realized what and what not to do. I'm not going to overdue myself in training… or in combat. Even in the exams... I'll be smart. And this time, I'll control myself."
A spark of relief lit in All Might's eyes. "That's the idea, young Midoriya. You're learning from my mistakes. I'm so proud that you've come this far. You're going to ace these exams, I know it. You have the talent in you, and now you've got the drive."
"I guess… I do."
Izuku didn't know if he'd ever believe he was truly enough. But, he just had to accept that and keep going. That's what heroes did, after all. When they couldn't save all the people or defeat all the villains, they didn't sit around cry; because look at what they had accomplished.
Look at what Izuku had done. Even before all his training. He'd saved lives, protected his friends, defended All Might, and so much more. He had done all that. He, Izuku Midoriya, the quirkless, useless, wannabe hero.
All and all, he wasn't perfect. Far from it, to be frank.
But, he was enough for the people he loved. And that, he supposed, was quite enough for him.
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