I will not kiss you.

Cause the hardest part of this.

Is leaving you.

It’s weird to think about my best friend who isn’t my best friend anymore. I feel weird thinking about whether she thinks of me as much as I think of her. I wonder if she wishes things turned out differently, if things didn’t end up the way they did. I think about if she had taken her meds yet, if she had lunch, what she had for lunch… Sometimes I wish I knew that the last time I hugged her was truly the last time I’ll hug her.